Preparing Phase Ten
It was evening and the pieces of Princess Luna’s grand game were standing at the ready to move into their positions.
Diamond Shadow had adorned herself with a variety of her old spy gadgets: a pair of binocular goggles, a belt with several pouches full of quick-cloud-powder and a headset to keep contact with Luna. The mare was obviously glad that she didn’t have to wear a bodysuit or a night-vision enhancement, as her natural colour would hide her perfectly in the night and her slitted gaze could easily pierce the darkness.
Autumn Galerina had been visited by the royal tailors, who had clad him in an amazing piece of tailoring. A fine tuxedo suit of purest black with pointy, bat-like edges and rims. He had also been given a shirt with generous ruffles and a blood red bowtie. To hide his unnatural appendage and to give him some more authority, they had added a black, one-shouldered cape with red inlay. It also hid yet another communication device so he could call for support if need be. Luna had noted that he looked even more vampiric than his fiancée now, but she had to admit, she loved the design. The tailor knew what the princess who regularly wore a cape made of bats liked.
And finally, there was the Princess of the night herself, clad in her regalia and crown, ready to hold court and support her followers through a communicator, hidden in her mane and crown if need be.
“Very well…” Luna said, nodding firmly “My sister and Twilight are to leave the castle within the next half hour. Blueblood and his entourage should appear not before the next full hour. I will open the night court immediately after this meeting.” She turned to the stallion in front of her “Autumn, I will do my best to be speedy in my proceedings. But even with Moneypenny’s and all other secretaries’ help, I am not sure how quickly we can finish. I trust that you use your skills as a speaker and leader to distract the prince. Don’t forget: You ARE my seneschal and speak with my fullest authority. Use it! Don’t stall with empty phrases and small talk. Demand that he asks his questions to you and answer them as you see fit. Prince Blueblood will not expect an actually competent leader to challenge his empty claims.”
Autumn nodded, a small yet proud smile sneaking onto his face. “Don’t worry, Princess. He isn’t the first, white royal pony I have had to stand up to. I won’t fail you!”
Luna nodded. “I am certain. I have also sent for Blanc Beauregard to oversee the meeting. He is an exceptional night guard. Maybe you should have a talk with him before Blueblood arrives.”
“You got Old Blanc to watch the whole thing?” Diamond Shadow giggled “Poor guy… don’t worry, love, he looks scary, but he’s a huge softie.”
“He has also been a day guard for a long time.” Luna added “His loyalty to Celestia and me is without question. You will meet him in the Blue Corridor in the east wing. Now you should better be off, Autumn. You may want to collect yourself before Blueblood arrives.”
Autumn nodded firmly. He turned to Diamond Shadow to give her a quick peck on the cheek only for her to grab his chin with her hoof and pull him into a big kiss on the lips. She winked at him as he pulled back and he gave a sheepish smile to Luna as he left towards the door.
“You seem glad that I rejected your offer, Agent Shadow.” Luna stated calmly after the door had closed behind the stallion.
“Let’s not talk about that anymore…” The other mare sighed “Being in love is scary enough. I don’t need to be reminded of my own foolishness.” A smirk invaded her features “And the fact that he looks really nice in that suit does help. Shows him off way more than our robes…”
~Rejected what offer?~ Autumn’s voice asked through the communicators and Diamond Shadow’s face went white. ~Did you invite her to dinner? I told you that we can’t have ponies over until I get new silverware! I know that we don’t use it often but it’s just good manners to- ~
“YES, HONEY, I INVITED THE PRINCESS TO DINNER! But you know… professional relationship and all, now be quiet and go humour Blueblood!” Diamond Shadow yelled into her communicator. A shiver went over her as she made sure to switch it off.
“I would agree to an invitation to dinner, Agent Shadow.” Luna offered carefully, her expression somewhere between surprised bemusement and reassuring gentleness.
“He’d love that…” Diamond Shadow answered carefully “but I don’t think that that would be a good idea. I am your guard, and if you start fraternizing with one of us… that would look like we were fishing for favours.”
The moon princess let out a sigh. “I am the absolute co-ruler of Equestria, the princess of the night, and… you know the rest. Every invitation Celestia and I get is about fishing for favours. My sister has simply adopted the strategy of pretending not to notice and allowing her deeds to redeem her from suspicion of corruption. What other headmistress would visit her student’s home to dine with their family?”
“Well… I had my headmaster over several times during my school time…” the bat pony admitted sheepishly.
“Yes, your ability to talk impressionable foals out of their lunch money is on record…” Luna answered with a wink “But as I said: I would not deny an invitation outright.”
A blush began to crawl onto the bat pony’s cheeks and she swallowed. “Erm… I think I should go and get into position, Princess. But I will think about it… Autumn would sure love it. And so would I… but maybe not in our home. It’s… small…” She quickly spread her wings. “I will keep contact, Princess!”
Luna watched her protector fly off, wondering why her employee was so worried about her home.
Diamond Shadow, meanwhile, hoped that she could stall a visit from the princess until their home was adjusted for royal visitors. Princess Luna didn’t need to see that they had installed the pole Autumn bought for her vertically and added a little stage for recreational dancing.
As Diamond Shadow was flying towards the royal chariot yard and Luna prepared mentally for another night of petitions and work, Autumn arrived in the Blue Corridor.The Blue Corridor was a marvel of architecture, as old as Canterlot Castle itself. Celestia had ordered it in memory of Princess Luna, therefore the hall had been decorated with sapphires and lapis. Small quartz crystals on the ceilings simulated a wonderful, starry night and at its end was the Midnight Chamber, a conference room known for a candelabra that had a full, silver moon at its centre. Maybe due to wishful thinking or out of nostalgia, Celestia had insisted that the creators leave out the mare in the moon, even though it was made after Luna’s banishment. The maids had already taken the orders of the ponies announced and left a buffet for them for dinner.
As announced, Blanc Beauregard was standing at the end, waiting without moving. Blanc was a career soldier only a few years short of retirement. The fact that he had few to no visible scars and only a few missing teeth was a testament to his sheer skill. Never one to go for a desk-officer’s career, he had been an honour guard of Celestia for a long time.. Though the change had turned his feathers into stringy leather they were still white as alabaster. His eyes had taken the typical slits of the night guard, though they had remained red, revealing his albinism and betraying the dye on his dark blue mane and tail.Autumn closed in on him, offering an awkward smile. He was not sure how to treat the guards in the castle.
“There you are…” Beauregard said with a smile, opening the door behind him. “Now, let’s talk this through: I had quick briefing with Luna, and I will announce you as ‘Night-Seneschal of Canterlot Castle’. I’ll pronounce it so it sounds like “Knight”. Makes it a bit more intimidating and respectable. Gits like Blueblood need that kind of fluff or they won’t hear a word when you talk. I think it’s better you give me a hooffull of things about you that I can spin a title out of. Trust me, I’ve been announcing ponies for decades now, I know how to-“ He stopped, noticing the complete surprise on Autumn’s face. “What?” the guard asked.
“I don’t know…” Autumn admitted “I just… didn’t expect you’d be so supportive. I mean, I just got the title and-“
Beauregard let out a laugh and shook his head. “When did YOU become so humble?”
“What do you mean?”
“Boy, last time I saw you, you burst into the throne room declaring the end of an era.” Blanc laughed.
“Goodness, you were there?” Autumn asked, old shame bubbling up inside of him.
“Didn’t have these at the time.” Blanc nodded, stretching the digits of his wings and spreading them a bit “But yeah, I was there when you made a complete and utter ass of yourself.” Bemusement danced over his features “But I can’t say that I resent you. You’re a weirdo… but one of the good kind of weirdos. When you come in to kick out the rightful ruler, you humiliate yourself and show the other princess some love. When Blueblood does it, he makes an ass out of himself, incites civil unrest and insults everypony around him. I go with the one who causes less damage.”
“Trust me, losing dignity is my forte…”
“I could say the same thing about myself. I literally got my haunch spanked by Nightmare Moon’s lightning! And now I serve her!”
“If I may ask: Why? Why did you join the lunar guard? I saw how unpleasant the changing process is. And you don’t seem as if-“
“As if I was waiting for pasture?” Banche laughed “I can tell you why: Because Celestia told me that she trusts Luna. Because that is all I need to know that I can trust Luna.” He sighed “And because it allows me to keep on doing what I love doing…”
Autumn tilted his head a bit to the side.
“Look, boy, you might have already noticed, but the “Blanc”-part in my name isn’t because of my shimmering heart. I suffer from albinism. Or better to say: I have always been albino, but I began suffering from it recently. I’ve always had issues with bright light. That’s part of not having any melanin. So I was given mostly night-shifts and nopony complained. But lately, I began having issues with age-related night blindness. And trust me, it's tough being the guard of the most important pony on the planet when you need a cane and an armband with three black dots.”
“But the change gives perfect nightvision.” Autumn added.
“Now you get it! Celestia offered me a pair of eyes that can actually see. And all she asked in exchange was me doing the same thing I have been doing for a long time.” He winked “Only that the colour of the princess has changed.”
“Glad to know that you are on my side…” the other stallion said with a sigh.
“If it’s against Blueblood? Who wouldn’t be? But I stick with the guy who goes steady with my comrade in arms… oh, speaking of… can I ask you a favour?”
“Sure.”
“Two weeks ago, your squeeze-“
“Bride to be!” Autumn interfered, not without pride.
“Congratulations! Anyways, she had these weird portobello biscuits with her and they were amazing! I was wondering if you could write down the recipe for my husband.”
“Do all lunar guards have a home stallion these days?”
“Mares weaken legs!” Blanc replied completely seriously.
“I’m not sure that means what you think it means…”
“I take any excuse to give my husband a good one. Anyways, you write me a note with your full name and a series of accomplishments that I can spin and I will make Blueblood want to go home and cry into his pillow before he even enters the room. Given you write the recipe for those awesome biscuits on the other side.” The guard added.
Autumn smiled. Saved by mushrooms… story of his life.
-
“Is that really your full name?”
“Never go on a drunk bender with a pony that can legally change your name.”
-
It had been almost an hour of waiting and Autumn had become excessively bored. Every ten minutes, he would ask for a status update on his co-conspirators and every time he got something like “Package wrapped and safe, over” from Diamond Shadow and a “Noble is still whining, over” from Luna. A part of him was wondering if the two had just ditched him and were now having a filly’s night out in the royal spa.
As thoughts of his two favourite mares being massaged by other, equally hot mares crossed his mind, he instantly forced himself to think about hoofball before his fantasies went to places he could not return from.
“Announcing!” Blanc Beauregard declared loudly “Prince Blueblood of Unicornia! Prince of the unicorns! The royal advisor of lawful matters: Marble Inkwell! And the court mage of Unicornia: The Great and Powerful Trixie!”
Three unicorns slowly approached the conference table. One was an old sage, burdened with glasses that seemed too heavy for him to keep on his nose and two saddle bags full of tomes and books, and advanced age. His coat was a matte yellow, his mane was black--combed over some balding--and his cutie mark was a square inkwell with the word “LAW” on it.
The second was a rather fetching mare in her best years. She had a sky blue mane with almost silver stripes in it, a brilliant azure coat and a cutie mark showing a moon and a wand. Autumn had never seen this mare before, but something about her spelled trouble.
And between them walked the big white himself! Prince Blueblood, still blond, big and handsome, just like Autumn had him in memory. How could anypony with a compass rose for a cutie mark be this lost?
As soon as Blueblood noticed that none of the princesses were in the room, his eyes narrowed. “WHAT IS THE MEANING OF TH-“ He began to scream, but an even more forceful voice interrupted him.
“Announcing!” Blanc continued “The night seneschal of Equestria, Autumnalis, The Third, Godzilla Galerina! Founder and Leader of the Followers of the New Moon! Co-inventor of the geothermal heating plant! Inventor and sole provider of Equestrian fungus cider! And most recent winner of the annual Canterlot stallion pole dancing contest!”
Autumn felt his chest swell with pride. He had worked his haunch off to get that medal! Much to Diamond Shadow’s pleasure.
“This is unheard off!” Blueblood yelled angrily while his advisor put one of the books on the table and began flipping through the pages. “Who is this traitor? We demanded a meeting with the princess! This is unprecedented! This is absurd! This is-“
“Actually, Prince Blueblood…” Marble Inkwell interrupted carefully “The Princess is clearly in her right to announce a seneschal and have him discuss matters with us. I even find this lad’s family in here. A very old bunch bu-“
“I get it!” Blueblood snorted and approached the table. “Anyways, I hope that Princess Luna is aware of what a spectacle she is making of herself! How can she expect this complete nopony-”
“Well, not nopony.” Inkwell added again. “Seems like they still hold a few old claims. If roughly 712 ponies, 41 donkeys, 12 gryphons, a minotaur and two goats were to spontaneously die, he would be the new prince of the unicorns!”
“Wouldn’t I be king in that case?” Autumn asked, slightly annoyed.
The elderly sage tilted his head slightly. “Hmm… I think you are just creepy enough to get kinghood. Though you look a tad more like a count at the moment…”
Autumn blinked. “What?”
“Have you no education if it comes to royal titles?” Blueblood grunted “Thanks to the ingenuity of my ancestor, the wonderful Princess Platinum, it was declared by law that royal titles are specified by the appearance of the wielder. Dashing males are princes, beautiful maiden are princesses, creepy weirdos are counts and so forth.”
~That is a law?~ Diamond Shadow's voice asked through the earpiece.
~We found it a small compromise when it was Platinum’s last demand before uniting the tribes. Granted, Celestia and I do enjoy our titles. It lets one forget the age…~
Autumn’s eye twitched, and his tentacle moved beneath his cape, slipping over the button of his communicator. It was stuck on send! The other two would be hearing every word that was about to be said in this room. This would get even more humiliating than expected.
“Even if this is somehow valid! The great and powerful Trixie did not put on her best hat and cape to stand before some glorified clerk!” the mare declared and ran a hoof through her mane. “Trixie was promised a chance to talk to Princess Luna and show her Trixie’s amazing feats in diplomacy and organization!”
~This mare is not using the royal Canterlot voice correctly! She sounds like a report from one of Celestia’s old tacticians! He always spoke of himself in the third person.~
“Well, I am here to listen to said ideas and suggestions and offer whatever help I can give before the Princess is done with her other duties and manages to join us here.” Autumn explained calmly. “Surely you will have little problem convincing me to bring those suggestions to her. I am certain to call for her once your wisdom has been revealed.”
~Using their ego, very well done Autumn. I knew you were the one to choose! Agent Shadow, how is my sister doing?~
~From what I can see, she is rolling around on the floor with Twilight’s mother while the dad and Sparkle share a knowing smile. Is that a thing with royalty?~
A satisfied smile crept onto Blueblood’s visage. This commoner seemed to know his place. But the mare beside him narrowed her eyes. “The great and powerful Trixie does not feel safe revealing her secrets to a complete stranger.”
“Both the guards as well as Mister Inkwell can vouch for my authenticity.” Autumn rebutted.
“Trixie is not concerned if you are who you are but about the fact that you might take credit for the work of the great and powerful Trixie!” Trixie stressed indignantly. “Trixie will not reveal her grand designs before anyone but the princess! Nopony here can vouch for your character!”
“Of course not… what is a title these days?” Autumn answered with only a hint of joy.He did, however, take great pleasure in her eyes narrowing. Now he was sure who had masterminded this evening.
“A title! That never changed!” Blueblood answered.
“Very insightful and accurate, my prince.” Inkwell answered eagerly. There was a sincerity in his voice that made Autumn wince internally. So far he could tell that Trixie and the prince were pretty much on the same level of sheer arrogance as well as determination. Marble, on the other hoof, was apparently more in love with titles and his regulations. He could prove as much an asset as a hindrance.
“So, how about we all have a bite to eat before the great discussion?” Autumn offered with a polite smile.
“What a blatant attempt to play for time!” Blueblood sneered. He wrinkled his nose.
“This was supposed to be a dinner over which we talk, and I thought we might as well eat if the esteemed guests refuse to talk.”
“Yes, yes, whatever!” the prince answered, waving his hoof.
Behind him, Blanc produced a bell from under his armour and rang it. Seconds later, two maids appeared and began preparing plates from the buffet.
“I think I know how to put food on a plate.” Autumn muttered. He approached the buffet himself, grabbing a plate in his forehoof.
~There is nothing wrong with getting served food, Autumn.~ Luna whispered.
“Yes, but while I shove things onto my plate I can talk to you.” The stallion answered into his cape as he grabbed a fork with his mouth. “Princess, do you have any suggestions how to deal with this?”
~The letter spoke of Blueblood asking for advice, and now the narrative has completely changed. It seems as if the two are trying to shove you into a defensive position. Also: I think I have heard the voice of this mare before… but I can’t put my hoof on it.~ the princess responded.
“Inkwell?”
~A means to an end. He is a court-known scholar and probably only there so Blueblood can back up any claims.~
Autumn nodded. “Thank you, Princess. I’ll do my best.” Not allowing himself a sigh, the stallion returned to the table. He had to admit this much: Blueblood had rather good table manners. But his lack of tact towards the maids made Autumn cringe a bit. Those mares and stallions did amazing work. Trixie was a bit better in that regard, though she didn’t take off her hat.The dinner tasted amazing, but the constant poisonous stares made it impossible to enjoy. At this point Autumn was wondering how those two could hold that kind of spite with food like this.
“So, are we just going to stare at each other angrily?” Autumn asked after what felt like an eternity of chewing.
“Why would I bother speaking with peasants?” Blueblood spat.
Autumn wanted to reply, but suddenly an idea crawled into his head. “Well, fine…” he said “Mister Inkwell. I was aware of my family’s past, but I’m not what you can call knowledgeable. You seem very well versed in genealogy. Could you tell me a bit about my titles?”
Inkwell’s eyes lit up. “But of course!” he giggled. Seconds later, he produced another book from his saddlebag that seemed to tower over the table. Autumn didn’t even want to consider how the frail stallion could carry it in a bag. “Well, let me see… oh, there they are. Galerina! What a shame that the line stopped recording all this time ago.”
“Yes, the records were purged after… her.”
“A tragedy… anyways, from what I can gather, your current titles are “Minor Gallant of Yaldaur”-“
“Of what?”
“That place doesn’t exist. I think it’s a scribal error. That’s probably why nopony retracted it.”
“I see…”
“Then you hold the right to a full four-poster bed with squirrel-fur curtains.”
“What?”
“Oh, it’s not being enforced, but by law, only nobles are allowed a four-poster bed. Beds were a status symbol back in the days.”
~Oh! Four poles for you to dance on! We should get one!~
~Agent Shadow!~
“And you are the current in line for the position of Hay Staler.” Inkwell ended.
~What is that?~
“You forgot my position as Seneschal.” Autumn added.
“Oh, that is actually a peasant’s title.” Inkwell said with a smile “It can be granted to anypony worthy of the title.”
~Oh? Celestia had that one changed?~
“Speaking of titles…” Autumn continued, an idea grazing his mind. “Trixie, you currently hold the title of court mage?”
“That is correct! Court mage of the unicorns is exactly what the great and powerful Trixie deserves! Trixie has, after all, almost bested the personal student of Princess Celestia!” the mare answered with apparent eagerness.
“It is also an earned title then.” Autumn continued, feigning interest.
“Indeed!” Inkwell answered before Trixie could “Granted by the unicorn royalty, it is a title that is open to whomever the highest noble deems worthy!”
“Ah, yes, Clover the Clever was given that title as well, correct?”
“Very good. She had indeed earned it. Not only was she Starswirl’s prodigy she al-”
“Anyways, we are not here for a history lesson!” Trixie interrupted harshly.
“Certainly not…” Autumn concurred “But what am I to do? I am here to offer advice and support. And if I can’t do that, I thought I could inquire a bit about history and titles…”
Trixie glared. “Fine… Trixie accepts your… authenticity. She will talk to you.”
Autumn nodded and suppressed the urge to do a little victory dance. “So, what irks you, prince?”
“If you must know, pawn, Trixie and your prince were worried about the state of affairs within the school for gifted unicorns.” Trixie explained with a bit of a scowl.
“Yes, Auntie’s pet project…” Blueblood nodded with an air of superiority. “I never understood why anyone would send their treasure there… I was educated in the most expensive private school in all of Trottingham.”
Yes, because you failed spectacularly at the entry exam! We are the same age. I was there! You went before me! You screamed at the dragon egg for ten minutes and then had a hissy fit over your nanny not being able to convince the jury of your creativity!
Autumn thought.
And that school was so expensive because it spends all bits on bribing the teachers to give minor academic titles to idiots like you!
“For as long as Princess Celestia is absent, I see uncertainty in the future of our most valuable foals.” Trixie added grimly.
“Celestia may be the headmistress as well as the teacher for several subjects, but I clearly remember that she always had very capable supplement teachers whenever she had to go on a diplomatic journey.” Autumn answered calmly “During the water crisis in Baltimare, she was gone for over two months, but we never had a single late lesson. I am certain she made precautions. Every foal will get the tutoring they need and deserve.”
“We are not worried about brats doing their homework!” Blueblood sneered. “We worry that the foals will be indoctrinated into anti-sun rhetoric.”
“Anti-Sun?” Autumn deadpanned.
“It might start harmless, but can you possibly imagine what kind of sabotage a group of indoctrinated foals might do?” Inkwell asked carefully.
“Sabotage the sun?” Autumn groaned “That thing in the sky? How can anyone sabotage the sun?”
Inkwell scratched his chin. “If you say it like that it does sound a bit-“
“The great and powerful Trixie will not tell a suspicious pony like you how to sabotage the sun! Trixie certainly knows a way!” Trixie interrupted.
~She is bluffing.~
~Excuse my impudence, Princess, but DUH!~
“Does it involve a big sling and a lot of wet sponges?” Autumn asked while rolling his eyes. “Goodness, with what is on the market right now even the craziest foal could at best launch themselves to Cloudsdale…”
Inkwell scratched his head. “That’s oddly specific…”
“Whatever!” Blueblood sneered. “Just because the brats can’t directly destroy the sun doesn’t mean that their minds won’t be warped by-“
“For goodness sake! Celestia will be gone for a week! You couldn’t brainwash a goldfish in that time!” Autumn groaned. “I am a cult leader! I should know.”
“Goodness!” Inkwell exclaimed “Cult leader? Then we can’t call you a king! Dear Leader! Yes, that would be your title.”
“Not nearly as impressive as Court Mage.” Autumn said, a smile creeping onto his lips “Say… Court Mage isn’t linked to land or any kind of inheritance, is it?”
“Of course not! Beside a minor stipend, it is a typical commoner’s title. Bound only to merit of skill and knowledge!” Inkwell answered.
“Where are you going with this?” Trixie asked with a hint of anger in her voice.
“Nowhere!” Autumn answered completely innocently. “It was just that I don’t remember you from the school for gifted unicorns… I mean, you would have been just a few classes beneath me. Like Twilight Sparkle was.”
A hint of paleness entered Trixie’s cheeks. “Trixie had an extensive education in the great and powerful school of life! I did not need petty schoolwork to become the mare I am today!”
“Oh, I would never doubt the merit of practical and diverse experience! I was just wondering how these titles are granted these days…”
“Oh, Prince Blueblood himself granted this charming filly her title.” Inkwell explained, completely overlooking Trixie’s hoof-sign to stop.
“She has earned it more than any other mare I could imagine!” Blueblood added proudly, equally ignorant.
“Good that it went to such a deserving young mare…” Autumn almost hummed “Some ponies might see it as some kind of stepping sto-“
“INKWELL, you are excused!” Trixie suddenly interrupted.
The elderly pony looked up in surprise. “But-“
“You will receive your full payment for your services, but it’s clear that we will not need any juristic or genealogic advice for the evening. Have a nice evening!” Trixie stressed, much to the surprise of the smaller stallion.
After a few moments of wondering, Inkwell fetched his books and left. Halfway out, Autunm quickly turned to Blanc. “Could you help him? And give us some time…”
Blanc nodded and took the elderly pony’s saddle bags.
“What a useful title to give to his marefriend.” Autumn noted as both other ponies were outside “Have her around until the other higher ups get used to her and suddenly there is no scandal when you go steady with a commoner, right?”
“Who told you that?” Blueblood exploded, both of his forehooves on the table.
“You just told him, my prince…” Trixie groaned.
~Autumn, I want you so much right now!~
~AGENT SHADOW! ~
“What? I would never tell anyone about us!” Blueblood stressed “Especially not some stranger like that!”
“I will explain it later…” Trixie groaned and turned to Autumn “That was extremely underhoofed!”
“That? Underhoofed? You sent a mule ninja after me! A NINJA!”
“Granted, Prince Blueblood let his passion get the better of-“
“NINJA!”
“Oh, please! Who hasn’t been bound and gagged these days?” Blueblood shrugged.
“It’s not exactly my kind of kink!” Autumn hissed.
~Oh goodness, no! Yours is way more fun!~
~Don’t you have a couple to stake out, Agent Shadow?~
~They are sitting in the living room and talking! Listening to my future hubby being amazing is the only thing that keeps me from falling off this cloud in boredom.~
“Fine, fine, the Ninja was a bit much. But you can’t deny that Celestia’s disappearance is extremely suspicious.” Trixie said “A vacation out of nowhere, and no contact with the outside world?”
“It wouldn’t be much of a vacation if she had to deal with all the nobles she has to deal with during her working hours, now would it?”
“Without a warning?”
“So the changelings have time to prepare a potential attack?”
~Nice one, honey! You can really look forward to when I come ba- No, wait! Package is moving. Package- No! Wait Package is wrapped but empty! Box is empty, bow is fancy!~
~Autumn, you have to keep them busy until the carriage is back. If they see an illusion come home, they will have every right to assume the worst!~
Both Trixie and Blueblood glared. “Very well, you have your story and you’re sticking to it.” Trixie said. “We are obviously wasting our time here.”
Autumn’s eyes went wide. “So… how did you meet?” he asked with a smile “You know… Must have been very interesting for royalty and the lower classes to come together!“
Trixie was about to put all her sarcasm into the answer, but Blueblood sighed dreamily “It was a night of pure glory! There I was, travelling to the meeting between Equestria and Sattle Arabia. I had prepared a speech about the ‘18 Hole War’-”
“You mean the one that they lost?”
“Indeed. Anyways, I was on my way, when suddenly, my guards seemed to vanish and a group of ruffians attacked me. Cowards as they were, they struck from behind, put a stinking bag over my head, slapped an inhibitor on my horn and left me bound in a ditch.”
~The guard calls it Protocol BB. They have become very- OH CRAP! Present incoming! Cutting com!”~
~Agent Shadow! What is going on?~
~They are landing on my cloud! Over and out.~
“So there I was! Bound! Gagged! Helpless! All alone in the world!” Blueblood continued dreamily. “And then she came! My heroine! My… erm… the Great and Powerful Trixie!”
Autumn had to suppress a giggle as Trixie actually blushed.
“Indeed, as if to reward me for my humility and kindness, Trixie found her prince bound and helpless when she ran… erm… retreated from the show for the Saddle Arabian delegation.” She looked over to Blueblood. “I found him in the ditch, unbound him, and at once knew that I had found a treasure.”
“And I rewarded my saviour with a title suited for her greatness and powerfulness--and, at some point, my affection.” The prince continued. Finally, his features hardened “So what do you want?”
“What?” Autumn asked.
“Until a certain time has passed, it would be highly problematic for our secret to see the light of day. I am ready to be… generous…” Blueblood stressed.
~They breed the good out of them! And are we that cheesy? Autumn, hit me if we ever get this cheesy!~
~I agree and you are, Agent Shadow! Did you escape my sister?~
~Ditched the cloud and am repositioning. Those two are too busy with each other to notice. Goodness, the sweet-talk!~
“Look, Blueblood, I don’t want anything from you! I just want you to give Princess Luna a chance! Stop your petty attacks and you will see that Princess Celestia will return as soon as the week ends.” Autumn stressed angrily. “And this is not a bribe! I’m not gonna tell your noble friends about your affair! Who do you think I am?”
“A weirdo cultist who looks like a vampire!”
“Point taken. But I’m not going to mess up your love for some… I don’t know. Petty politics. There isn’t anything in it for me. You don’t have anything I could want!”
Blueblood glared. “I am a prince!”
“Did this seriously just hurt your ego?”
The prince gave an indignant snort.
“Whatever. Your secret is safe with me. Just don’t send any more ninjas!”
~My servants just informed me that the carriage has arrived. You can release them, Autumn. I will talk to you two in the morning. Thank you for your amazing work! Your princess is very proud! Luna out!~
Autumn let out a sigh. “Fine. I think we have said everything there is to say. You can look forward to explaining all this mess to Celestia when she comes back…”
“Auntie will understand that I do all this out of love!” Blueblood announced loudly, turning to go.
“Erm… Miss The Great and Powerful Trixie, could I talk to you for a moment?” Autumn asked suddenly.
Trixie rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Darling, give me a second…”
Blueblood nodded and left the room.
“You’re not a gold digger. Godhood isn’t worth this treatment. How in Luna’s name do you handle this guy?” Autumn groaned.
Trixie gave him another glare. “He means it!” she hissed.
“What?”
“He does this because he is seriously worried about his aunt!” Trixie said in a strained voice “He cares! He cares deeply! He thinks he is a beacon of virtue and role-model! And that he has to act like that because of it. But nobody ever told him the truth. Nopony ever told him how much of a twit he can be. But you know what? Trixie once did. Trixie once told him that he was hurting ponies. And he was devastated! He couldn’t look in the mirror for a whole day! That’s like a week for Trixie… and two weeks for the average pony! But that’s beside the point! Trixie happens to like him! Trixie was lost in in her own ego too and Trixie knows that one can change!”
Autumn sighed. He really wasn’t the best pony to criticise anypony’s love life. “So, where did you actually go to school?”
“The Ecole Gaullier Prance!” Trixie answered proudly
“Wait! That’s a clown school!”
“I WAS IN THE MAGICIAN COURSES!” The mare yelled, rushing to leave as well
Autumn sighed in relief, at last allowing himself to slouch a little..
~You did amazing, love!~
Autumn bit his lip. “I’m sorry…” he muttered.
~What?~
“I never told you… I know that you hate nobility, but I never told you that I was one of them. I knew that we had still-”
~Have you BUCKING LOST IT?~
Autumn flinched as the yell rang through his ear. Diamond Shadow was past pushing the volume of the speaker.
~I hate nobles for what they do! For being terrible to ponies! If you are one, you are proof that there might be a chance for them to end up good ponies! DON’T EVER BE ASHAMED OF WHERE YOU COME FROM EVER AGAIN!~
The stallion flinched again “Yes, love…”
~And by the way: You’re gonna get so much flank when I’m back! Go to bed and wait in position 4!~
“YAY! Position 4!”
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- NeonEclipse · 33k words · 862 23 · 14k views
- HermitKlam · 27k words · 680 17 · 15k views
- viwrastupr · 33k words · 630 14 · 10k views
- TAW · 15k words · 1,311 29 · 23k views
- butterscotchsundae · 70k words · 1,248 45 · 18k views
- butterscotchsundae · 3.4k words · 869 21 · 15k views
- Medievalman · 35k words · 1,076 39 · 17k views
- aquilerafroot · 40k words · 996 24 · 23k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.044 seconds
Total duration
978 users online
243,380 hits today, 2,314,256 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
And here I was wondering why I faved this. This chapter slammed me in the throat and let me have it for even thinking that. I love this chapter.
Wow an update to this story. Awesome.
I hope I can say "welcome back!". And I definitely enjoyed the chapter :)
I am mildly disturbed by this chapter. Stuff happens and I'm just taking it and thinking: well, that happened.
Squeeeeeee! Yay!! A new chapter to read when I get off work! I love this story! So happy a new chapter was posted!
22nd Dec 2015, 6th Jun 2016, 8th Feb 2018... those are very big differences in time... and doesn’t bode well for my patience...
Eh, whatever, I’ll see what happens.
Glad to see you back.
this is fucking great I have to reread this one later
8719542
Exactly my sentiment. I'm happy as a little filly, but have no clue what was going on. BRB, rereading.
>Karrakaz releasing daily updates on new steamy TwiLestia
>Davesknd releases first update in ages to favorite ongoing TwiLestia RomCom
Is this what heaven feels like?
This is an excellent chapter, glad you didn't lose your touch!
Also, it was confirmed, by Faust, that Trixie did assisted in the School of Gifted Unicorns... But that's beyond the point
This was so good. Raising characters from walking jokes without losing the humor? Good show
baldingg = balding
they won’t hear a word when talk = when you talk
your creativity!
Autumn thought.nd that school was so expensive
= Extra paragraph break and a missing "a"
Now I want to re-read this! Had it tracked and favorited forever. So good to hear you're back.
I love the air of casual ridiculousness that follows Autumn around and how it fits so naturally into everything. I'm really enjoying this!
That ending... Ha!
Glad to hear that you made a recovery. I hope you keep pushing forward.
8718943
Oh, physical violence? Just what I like to hear. Good chapter, keep hurting people!
8719030
Distress, pain... wow, this chapter is on fire!
8719902
Glad you enjoyed it.
Sorry, but I just like the idea of Trixie going to a clown college and gambling that people don't know what it is way better.
8720561
What can I say? It's the goal I had for myself. And while I love to hate Blueblood, I don't like the idea of "the bad guy" in the context of MLP: FiM. It works for exceptions like Chrysalis and... no, the others are pretty boring... (Discord being nice now)
8721219
I'm glad. Casual madness is exactly what this setting deserves if you ask me
8722518
Thank you. I will
I had put off reading this story a LONG time ago, I had red the first three or four chapters when they came out and decided I was going to wait until it ended to continue/re-read it. So today, I finally find it flicking through my read later and felt like I was in the mood for some adorable Twilestia, and holy hell was this amazing. I just love the fluff and the interactions between all of them.
I know it isn't finished yet, but I'll be anxiously awaiting updates. I was overjoyed to see that it's alive, and that got me to reading the AN- which I tend to skip over since I usually read on breaks at work.
I'm glad you got help, and I'm legitimately happy that you're back to writing again. Not just because it's an awesome story that deserves to continue, but you seem like a cool person. I hate seeing people suffer, and seeing that you've gotten out of a deep trench in your life and have enough positivity in your life again to summon up the drive to resurrect a two year old story means that even if you're not actually out of that trench, you're climbing.
The community might not be what it used to, but if you feel yourself slipping don't be afraid to reach out to your fellows here. Some of us at least care more about the Twilestia.
TL;DR: Awesome story, glad things have turned around in your life!
Sorry to hear you were suffering from depression glad you got and all better now.
I really love your story especially the chapters like this one with Luna Autumn and Shadow those three are hilarious adorable and awesome together and that ending made me lol!
Of all the things that entered my mind in this chapter....
I kinda want to know what position 4 is now.
This is a wonderful story.But I'm wondering if it will continue it has good potential.Well I'm glad your getting better I know depression and make things seem like you just don't matter.Also if anyone pressure a you about the story SCREW THEM THOSE COLDS
8869904
"Position 4" might the the one with the weather vane.
I kindly ask for more updates, please.
Love this, please more!
*POSITION 4!* -me, giggling like a mad person-
This is so cute!! Yay position 4!!! I do hope you update this eventually.