Chapter 33: May 21, The Best Night Ever
Yet Another Human in Equestria Story
By: Bardic Knowledge
Chapter 33: May 21, The Best Night Ever
It was time at last for the Grand Galloping Gala. I had yet to tell everyone how their dreams weren't going to work out, because in comparison to the heartbreak of Pinkie thinking her friends were abandoning her, the event was going pretty much just going to be a minor inconvenience. Plus, I didn't want to ruin Princess Celestia's fun.
Trixie's intention on going to the Gala with me had changed over the months. Instead of wanting to go to shill herself as was her initial intention, she just wanted to go with me to dance. I did have some plans for the night outside of a few dances, but she didn't mind as long as I was there at the start of things.
As I've stated in an earlier chapter, it takes pretty much twelve hours to get to Canterlot by train. So you'd think it would take longer to get there by hoof, wouldn't you?
So did I.
It turns out that it actually only takes about six hours by hoof, with some slight differences based on cargo. The reasons for the massive discrepancy and why no one minds the train taking longer are fairly simple: for one, the train has to take an inclined and winding path carved out of the mountain that adds a surprising amount of time. The other main reason is that the train is incredibly more capable at the mass movement of cargo and ponies, facilitating the economy (and there are plenty of ponies out there too lazy to hoof it).
So the whole carriage ride idea presented in the episode for the Gala was not only feasible, but faster. Twilight's little Cinderella pastiche, though? I may not have been there at the time, but I did let Fluttershy and Rarity know what was likely to happen.
Anyways, the girls spent the morning getting ready, and I started at noon. In part because I wanted the sleep, and also because I had much less hair than them, which would speed up my end of the full spa treatment Rarity was treating us to.
So, with all of us decked out in our finery and Twilight's apple-carriage being big enough for all eight of us, we set off for Canterlot Castle. Spike decided to sit up top for some reason, likely pretending to be the driver even though Noteworthy and the other guy (I didn't get his name, but he looked a lot like Caramel) knew where to go.
I spent the journey looking out the window at the landscape rolling by whilst everypony talked excitedly around me, holding Trixie's hoof in my hand. As the sun dipped below the horizon, I was treated to a spectacular burst of night sky, the moon glowing bright and big in the distance.
As we neared Canterlot, Rarity's voice broke through the conversation with a breathy "Canterlot."
With a quick glance at Trixie and Twilight, who were smiling, I echoed, "Canterlot!"
Trixie followed suit, "Canterlot!"
"It's only a model," said Twilight, in exactly the right tone of voice.
I shushed her, and then the three of us plus Pinkie started laughing.
"I'm sorry, but... what?" asked Applejack.
"It's a reference to a movie from Earth. The movie in question is a parody of the legendary tale of King Arthur, whose castle was known as 'Camelot.'"
"Interesting coincidence. Canterlot and Camelot, I mean," commented Twilight.
"Certain themes are present in every universe. When used as a literary device they're known as 'tropes.' Another parallel between the legends and this world, for instance, would be Merlin and Starswirl; two powerful wizards of great renown. Or to lean on another universe, Narsil and Caliburn, which were succeeded by Anduril and Excalibur. Arthurian legend is deeply ingrained in the culture of England, so far as I know, and a ghost of that was carried over to American culture."
Twilight glanced out the window and sighed. "I wish I had more time to talk to you about that, but we're almost there now." She perked up slightly. "This night is going to be so great!"
A few minutes later, the carriage pulled to a stop outside the palace and the "Into The Woods"-esque song began. I was determined not to join in. Not only did I not feel like singing about dancing with my marefriend and wanting to visit with Princess Luna, but I had my secret plan that I didn't want to reveal by accident. Trixie, however, joined in, and did sing about dancing with me. She also sang that she wanted to shill her talents as an illusionist to the Canterlot nobles, in not so many words.
Spike stood beside me as they sang, and I said farewell to our "drivers." As they didn't have tickets, they couldn't come into the Gala proper, but there was a place for chauffeur/driver/cart-pulling ponies to stay during the Gala and eat and drink.
Once the song itself was over, the Mane Six scattered themselves around the area, leaving me, Trixie, and Spike behind.
“Well, I can at least show you guys around, right?” asked Spike hopefully.
I sucked a breath through my teeth, “Sorry, Spike. We've got a couple dances to do before Pinkie disrupts the music-”
“Wait, what?”
“-And then I'm going to see if I can find Princess Luna while Trixie attempts to hob nob with the big wigs. But, hey, we'll meet up later, alright?”
Spike kicked at the floor despondently. “Okay...”
“Spike,” added Trixie. “Isn't there anyone you used to know in Canterlot that you could find at the Gala? Just to catch up on things or something?”
Spike perked up slightly at that. “Well, I guess I could see if Moondancer is here. She is from a noble family, so she could have gotten an invitation.” He headed off into the crowd, an eager smile on his face.
“Well, then. I hope we'll still run into him at Donut Joe's. Whatever. Shall we dance, milady?” I bowed and held out a hand.
“Let us dance,” she replied. And though I felt a hoof in my hand, when I looked to her, she had applied her human illusion, this time wearing her Gala dress instead of the outfit from Nightmare Night, only it had been somewhat re-tailored to suit her human form, looking similar in shape to Belle's gown from Disney's Beauty and the Beast. She smiled at my reaction. “I talked to Rarity about what it should look like on a human. And ever since Twilight accidentally told me about the anthropo- anthromo- humanizing spell, I've been practicing walking on my hind legs for this dance.”
I groaned. “That was supposed to be a huge surprise. I'm guessing that she let it slip during the Photo Finish thing?”
Trixie simply nodded and led me out to the dance floor. Pinkie had already disturbed a few of the nobles that were just standing around talking and was looking mildly confused at their stuffy reaction to her idea of a party. Honestly, I think I would prefer Pinkie's parties to this thing, if only because they feel warmer, cozier, homier.
Trixie and I got more than a few few stares as we walked into the ballroom, just in time for what I recognized as a song with a waltz beat started playing. Which was exceptionally fortuitous, because the only dance I really know how to do is the waltz. I found it rather odd, though, that of everyone in the room, only Trixie and I were actually dancing. Everypony else was just standing around talking or staring at us in fascination.
After the waltz, the band started playing an incredibly dreary-sounding tune, which I don't think ReDead could have danced to. And they dance without music, just Link wearing the Captain's Hat! So, feeling really disappointed, Trixie dropped her illusion and sank back to all four hooves, with a soft sigh of relief (pony skeletons were not designed for bipedal motion).
“Well, at least we managed one dance,” I said.
“Yeah...” sighed Trixie. “Judging by the atmosphere, I'm actually hesitant to even try and do the simplest of tricks.”
I pondered for a moment. Yes... That might work. “Well, neither of us are sure where in the castle Princess Luna is, right? I only know that Princess Celestia and Twilight are near the entrance because Celestia's on greeting duty.” There was a scandalized gasp just to my right. I glanced over to the noblepony, quirked an eyebrow, and turned back to Trixie. “Maybe if we split up and both look for Princess Luna, we'll be able to hang out with her for a while. If you find her first, send up a firework illusion, and if I find her first I'll ask her to do something similar.”
Trixie smiled. “Sounds like a plan.”
I gestured towards the gardens, “I'll check out this side of things. If neither of us finds her in the next, say, twenty minutes we'll meet up at Donut Joe's.” After a quick hug, we separated.
I headed straight for the sculpture garden. The wind was light, so I couldn't depend on the victory flag flapping in the wind to guide me, but I kept my ears open as I scanned the area. After about five minutes of looking, I finally spotted the bright orange flag, and only a couple feet away stood my target.
“So, here's the deal,” I said, stepping up to Discord's statue. “You and I both know that the seal keeping you in there is weakening, and it won't be long 'til you're free. Being what I am,” – In other words, a Brony. – “I can almost feel it weakening as I speak.
“So, I have a wager for you: Once you're free, you get one chance to break the girls permanently without my interference and be free forever. If you succeed, I will willingly be your servant, you could even make me immortal, if you wished, then, if you wanted, you can try following my quantum frequency back to my reality. Spread the chaos to other realities. However, if the girls manage to recover, also without my interference, and hit you with the Elements of Harmony, I get a fraction of your powers. Only enough that I can handle, because let's face it, you're the Kami of Chaos, and I'm only mortal. I'll even spread a little chaos in your name from time to time, but it won't be anything overly destructive.”
I turned away and started walking. “Think it over. We'll shake on it when you get out.” I paused. “Oh, and you may want to keep an eye on the Gala tonight. You might find it funny.”
Now that that was done, it was time to actually seek out my favourite Princess. Maybe I could keep this year's Nightmare Night from being a total disaster.
About five minutes after leaving Discord behind, I saw a flash of light in the sky. Looking up at it, the image of Trixie's cutie mark was just fading, and I hurried in its direction.
I passed around the castle to find a courtyard overlooking Canterlot itself, a stone balcony with a gazebo upon it at the edge. Near the gazebo, Trixie and Luna stood, talking, Trixie alternating between being boastful and bashful. Luna, for her part, looked mildly confused. I approached the two of them and bowed.
“Your Highness, it is good to see you again.”
Luna's confused look faded slightly, “Ah, Joseph, it is indeed a pleasure.”
Trixie seemed rather relieved to see me.
I looked out over the city. What had been blinding light when I first visited Canterlot almost a year ago was instead dotted with glittering lights, some of which were street lamps that were reflected off the buildings. It seemed to almost be a reflection of the night sky.
“I'm glad to have found you, your highness. There's some things I wish to speak to you about.”
“Oh?”
“It pertains to a future event. I presume you've heard of Nightmare Night at this point?”
“Indeed We have, though most in the castle seem oddly skittish when We ask for more information. There has been little to be found in the library as well.”
“That's because it pertains to Nightmare Moon, and a legend that I'm quite certain is false. Though, I'm not one-hundred percent on that. However the event began, it has since changed to a festival of sorts.”
Luna looked bewildered. “A festival? What sort of festival could possibly stem from Our transformation into Nightmare Moon?”
“I feel the best way to explain it would involve explaining Earth's comparable holiday, Halloween, though I may get a few facts wrong. The name is a corruption of 'All Hallow's Eve,' the night before All Saints' Day. Legend had it that All Hallow's Eve was a night were the boundaries between Earth and the fae worlds were thin, and all manner of demons and faeries and creatures would interact with the world. I'm not sure how it developed into candy, but children would dress up in costumes to, I think, trick the fell creatures into thinking they were one of them.
“In the modern age, the tradition is to escort kids dressed in various costumes based on famous figures or concepts from house to house to get candy. Halloween has become one of those traditions children look forward to.”
“So, Nightmare Night is a holiday of candy and costumes?” Luna said, looking contemplative.
“There's slightly more to it than that, actually. You know how fear can cause a euphoric feeling when it passes?”
Luna's expression became cautious, “Indeed?”
“Well, there are a lot of people, and ponies, that have fun by being frightened.” I smirked. “In fact, this year I plan on turning my house into a haunted house for Ponyville to enjoy.”
“Fun...? We are afraid We have not heard this word before.”
Trixie was startled. “Really, Princess? That seems odd.”
“Well, even on Earth 'fun' is only six hundred years old, so it's understandable.” I screwed up my face for a moment. “To have fun is to enjoy oneself. There are many ways to have fun, but the most common is to play ga-”
I was interrupted then by a loud shout from the ballroom. It was a voice, and words, that I recognized. “-LOVE ME!”
Luna and Trixie looked startled at the shout, and I nodded. “I believe that's our cue. Your Higness, it was nice to talk to you, though I wish it had been longer.” I paused. “Actually, would you like to come with? Your sister will be there.”
“Whoa, Joe,” said Trixie, holding up a hoof. “What?”
“That was Fluttershy, quite mad about the animals of the castle gardens being skittish around her. Chaos currently reigns in the ballroom, and the Elements plus Celestia are going to be going to Donut Joe's. Spike is already there.”
“Oh.”
Luna sighed. “While it would be a nice diversion, We will likely be needed to restore order. Have a good night, Joseph. Trixie.” Luna opened her wings and prepared to take off.
“Just a moment more, Highness,” I said. “When Nightmare Night comes this year, if you do come to Ponyville... The ponies won't be used to you. They'll likely remember Nightmare Moon more than the de-powered form you had before. They'll be scared. Just try to remember that, please?”
Luna smiled. “Of course. Thank thee for the advice.” And she flew to the ballroom doors and entered. As Trixie and I left, I could hear Luna's Traditional Royal Canterlot Voice echoing out the doors.
Unfortunately, Trixie and I had almost no idea where to find Donut Joe's. She hadn't been to Canterlot before, and though I had, I didn't know the streets or the location of the shop. So, there we were, dressed to impress and wandering the night time streets of the capital.
“Had a good night?” I asked.
“Yes,” said Trixie, smiling up to me. “You?”
“I had a marvellous night, my dear.” I held a hand out to her, and she put a hoof in it. I exerted my small strength to lift her to bipedal height and stared into her eyes.
After a couple seconds, I committed myself to what I had set out to do.
And kissed her.
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Interesting deal Joe's trying to cut with Discord. I just hope Joe knows what he's setting himself up for, figuratively making a deal with the Devil.
Oh, and by the way...
Merry Christmas!
If I recall theirs something on the evil overlord list on how much power one should absorb let me just check...
Ah here we are!
Rule 22 No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I will not consume any energy field bigger than my head.
Hope Joseph knows that rule of thumb...
5422253
Well, yes. Hence the line
While I may not have the numbers memorized like my best friend, I do know all the major points of The Evil Overlord List. Which is why my laughter is only semi-maniacal.
5422269 Oh I knew he knew that he couldn't take much but I didn't know if he knew how much was to much what if he had gone for say a torso sized ball of energy? No doubt that would still be a fraction of Discord's power, but it would also be much riskier for him.
Yay for the Gala!
YAHES update? This really is a merry Christmas!
In any case, a lot of dominoes being set up here. I look forward to seeing them fall. I know how a few will go, but others not so much.
I love this chapter so much!
Pros: Scene with Discord
Trixie and Joseph Ship (LET IT SAIL)
Spamelot
Into The Woods
Luna is Best Princess
Cons:
This is all I can think about when "Milady" is said.
i1.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/014/711/1380697092809.jpg
As you can see, the Pros outweigh the cons, big time.
Merry Christmas to you!
5427332
...I'm afraid I don't know what that picture is supposed to be referencing.
But I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter.
5428466 It's not really a reference to anything in particular, it's just meme that portrays fedora wearers as people who view themselves as being a higher class than other people (it's a meme for a reason, but perhaps not the best reasons). A better picture probably would have been this one:
i.warosu.org/data/fa/img/0060/51/1367138294599.jpg
It's all silly.
5430224
I think that's actually somewhat amusing, because I consider myself a gentleman, but in the S.C.A. I'm a beggar. So is my dad, but he's also a baron.
Also, I'm not sure that's a fedora. I don't really know, because I don't like hats.
And suddenly, Trixie was new alicorn princess.
WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT?!
5453669
/).- That's supposed to be Luna. Thanks for pointing that out.
No! Not the romance! Why world!
5666415
I'm working on the last chapter now. I was hoping to have it up by now, but I've been running into a lot of writer's blocks along the way. There will be a sequel.
Oh monty python, never change