• Member Since 15th Jun, 2012
  • offline last seen Oct 30th, 2019

Evening Storm


T

A pegasus named Evening shares his final words with you before he gives up on living. He can't take his life any longer. He is done.


First person story.
Rated teen for suggestive moments

Chapters (2)
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Comments ( 27 )

:fluttercry: Oh no even the title makes me sad.

Bro..... your scaring me. :twilightoops:

2406655 Nothing.... it's just that this story is pretty much a suicide note. :applejackconfused:

2406671 that is what it's supposed to be.

Hmn, interesting. I am left questioning what this 'carving' could be however.

this is good, but depressing.... :fluttercry: it has a strong sentiment to it

Hmmmm. Decently written, but seeing at how this is a letter hand written by the character I can't really judge any grammatical errors and certain spelling mistakes.

However, I believe that the Fiance was physically cutting and harming Evening.

Noooo!!!! Midnight is dead!

Despite wanting to pick at this thing for being even a letter, I really cannot due to what you mentioned. For a suicide note, it seems a pretty decent one considering the fact I have written them myself. I do like the mystery of it all, especially what the marefriend did to Evening Storm. Overall, intriguing concept that is delivered well enough to be readable. One thing I might suggest is a continuation of sorts and see how the marefriend of Evening falls as well or something, just an idea. :twilightsmile:

sad yes, but it didn't exactly seem to spike the interest. slow beginning and a quick ending, that is what i seemed to have noticed first. if you can find a way to reverse roles the story would be quite enjoyable.

Man this makes me want to cry:raritycry:

5617498 yeah. i wrote while i was in a dark place. Hope you liked it

5617508
I did like it. Very descriptive. Made me feel like I was the one reading the letter:fluttercry:

5617517 that was exactly what i was aiming for

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