The Twilight Struggle

by Lapis-Lazuli and Stitch

Chapter 10 - Twilight's Struggle

The Mind of Twilight Sparkle, ??? until Sunrise

Logical, she needed to be logical about this.

Twilight sat in her old, original unicorn mare form with none of those special gobbledegooks that strange shadow has made her up in. Sure, she had been attractive, but it had been a very odd attractiveness. Right now, she needed to focus on the important things. Namely, what did she stand to gain, and what did she stand to lose?

Her surroundings looked and felt exactly like the Golden Oaks library. It had been trivial to transform her head-space into a place that was far more comforting and familiar. She wished she had a little mental Spike here to help, but she’d have to do the heavy lifting herself this time. Tomes began to flow off of the shelves, one at a time. Within each was a piece of her. Memories of friends, accumulated knowledge, and one particularly massive tome which sat prominently in the center of her library.

The binding was simple, stitched together with the gentle loving care of a filly trying to do the job of a pony many years her senior. Yet there was warmth and soul in every stitch, and in the crude art that graced the cover of a small purple unicorn and a tall white Alicorn embracing one another.

The shadow being had nearly overplayed his hand, she thought. He obviously held some long standing grudge against Celestia, she thought. Yet the small dark tome which contained his story that was now sitting quietly next to the far more massive tome had softened her heart to him somewhat. Tragedies of power were not unknown to Twilight, Celestia had insisted she read a great many of them to learn the perils of taking the easy road to power. Of course, he could very well merely be trying to trick her with a story that would call out to her memories of herself.

She did not think so, though. The pony calling himself Tantalus had far too much of the air of a young pony he’d claimed to be upon his botched ascension ritual. That had been the only explanation she could come to – that the boy had taken the lessons of the ancient magical tome and tried to utilize a spell he had frankly no hope of actually completing. Through sheer determination and willpower, he’d actually modified earth pony magic to act, however briefly, like Unicorn magic. Such an act would have been very attractive to a dark creature as described in Saddle Trelahny’s book, proof of immense strength of will and a willingness to do anything to accomplish his goals.

Ultimately, Twilight could not reconcile any sort of special earth pony ritual as being true. Simply it had been the truth as he had experienced and seen it, in a time so long ago when knowledge of that kind was always slipping into the wrong hands. After committing such an act and losing so much for so little gain was it any wonder that he covered the truth up with a fanciful tale about Star Swirl the Bearded or how the Princesses had taken his rightful place as protector of Equestria?

She felt pity for the poor creature. More, she felt a keen kinship with him that was difficult to place – much of it likely stemming from their so different backgrounds, yet so obviously similar loves. Her desire for scholastic achievement and magic had led her to become the student of Celestia. His desire for the same had led him down a path of darkness an eternal loneliness in the dark places of the world, forever shunned by the society he loved. It was a cautionary tale, to be certain and a reminder of the things she fought for every single day.

None of this brought her any closer to an answer. Logic, she reminded herself sternly and continued to pull tome after tome down from the shelves that surrounded her. A pile of parchment and a set of her finest quills floated from the supply cabinets. Ever since she had come to Ponyville, Twilight was more convinced than ever that no problem could remain unsolved when properly presented it in list form. She mentally unstopped an ink bottle and dipped in the quill pen, taking a moment to quietly focus.

A fresh sheet of parchment slipped quietly onto the worn wooden table, and she carefully scratched into the top of the sheet ‘Accepting Tantalus’ Power – Pros and Cons.’ A neat dividing line separated the two sides of the parchment, and a quick table put together of the two categories. Okay, think of the costs first. Always best to think of the negatives before the positives, lest you bias the results.

Tomes by the dozen floated about the room as she pulled their knowledge into the fore of her mind. Images of the battle she had fought against Nightmare Moon were at the forefront. It seemed so obvious now, how Luna had somehow been able to out-class Celestia in power after her transformation. She had been backed by a second powerful creature, one strong enough to tip the scales into her favor. That argued that Tantalus was in possession of an incredible amount of raw magical energy for a pony, but that same magical energy was not exactly wholesome.

“The shadow magic appears to be based on his earth-pony magic. It ties him physically and mentally to the earth itself, but prevents him from gaining power beyond that. However, if my understanding of this transference is correct – I would effectively be gaining the same earth pony magic, but without the restrictions.” She hemmed and hawed, examining his small black tome again and again, pouring over the details of what it could do. “Further, it appears to be capable of modifying his appearance and provides him with some limited powers in the Night magic domain. This magic bears a strong resemblance to the ‘Black’ school of magic, which would explain the inevitable corrupting influence it had over the years upon him.”

Pages turned over and over, Twilight’s mind began to pick up speed as she examined the minute details of how he described his powers. “Yet, there is strong evidence here that he resisted any serious corruption of purpose or mentality for nearly a thousand years. His hatred did not coalesce into action until very, very recently.” The dark journal snapped shut as Twilight pondered the implications of this. Of course, earth ponies already lived the longest of the three tribes. Yet powerful unicorns had often had dramatically long lifespans, stretching even into multiple centuries for those whose power ran at the zenith. His mental fortitude was not merely the product of study and self-determination – it had come from within.

The implications were intriguing. That an earth pony, lacking any formal teaching or study in discipline had kept at bay the corruptible influences of the power for so long was mind boggling. It also suggested that she, even in her youth, would be able through careful study and self-discipline ultimately master that magic to the ends of good. There would of course, be side effects – But were they not ultimately worth what she would gain?

There was no doubt in Twilight’s mind that Tantalus was better read than she – more than that, his story suggested he had kept copious notes for hundreds of years as to the historical goings on throughout the world. Even more exciting was the prospect of getting her hooves on his notes on the nature of magic from an earth pony perspective. A lustful greed for that knowledge seized her for a moment as she contemplated the incredible things such a dedicated scholar might unravel over the course of ten centuries.

Just as the thoughts began to cross her mind, she recoiled from them – flinging her dream self away from the dark journal with panicked breaths. “By Celestia, what WAS that?” she whispered out, and a moment later a figure faded into view…it was Tantalus, but...

~”That is the price I paid. It is the monster who gave me my power. Worry not, he can have no hold upon you.”~ She narrowed her eyes at him – no longer the strong, full bodied earth pony, Tantalus was…cute. He looked young and gangly, all slim half-grown limbs too long for his body. His coloring was different now – a bright, verdant green that seemed pale under the gentle light of the library. ~”My apologies. I know I promised you peace, but my time in this world grows short.”~

Twilight furrowed her brow and moved back into a sitting position – shadows seemed to be shredding off of him at an accelerating rate. “What’s going on?” It was against her better judgment, but curiosity had always been her sin. The little earth pony gave off a shiver, as though he was excessively cold. He licked is lips and stood as straight and tall as he could.

His voice was higher pitched now – but still in those lower registers that identified nearly all earth ponies. ~”Your friends came for you. It is taking a considerable amount of my power to keep them from killing me and removing you from the place where everything must occur. “~ He shuddered again as Twilight’s mind exploded with joy. Her friends had come for her. Streamers and colored balloons floated about her head space, and triumphant music seemed to sing from the walls as her emotions translated to the world around her. Tantalus merely sneered – but it was without rancor, only weariness. ~”It is good to know you find joy in my imminent demise.”~ his voice took on a sarcastic tone, biting and laced with sour acid.

Twilight gave him a flat look, crossing her hooves over her chest and giving him a dismissive sniff. “Nonsense. My friends would never harm you, and soon enough we’ll have all the time in the world for you to be cured so you can turn over all of this knowledge to the Princess-“ A sudden roar of black wind cut off her sentence, sending her careening back against the wall. The eyes of the tiny earth pony were practically afire with rage and…sadness? He was crying. Amidst all of this power, he wept like a child being scolded by his parents even as the power hammered her to the wall and suddenly cut off, silence filling the library.

His voice was forced out from behind his teeth as he wiped the tears away with an awkward hoof. ~”No. There will be no future for me now. It is too late to stop the ritual one way or another, and now I lack the strength to survive it. I underestimated your Brother and those meddling friends of yours, and they have damaged me sufficiently to ensure I cannot preserve my life and keep the ritual from going out of control.. I will die, Twilight Sparkle. After fifteen hundred years, I will know the peace of my grave, and you will take NOTHING from me unless I get what I want first!” His voice was as stubborn as Applejack at her worst, his eyes flinty with determination forged over centuries.

Twilight’s mouth fell open slightly – His mind contained history and knowledge that was centuries old! Only princess Celestia knew more, and there were things she had never bothered herself with learning. Who knew what sort of mysteries he could lay to rest? His library was as old as he was, and contained who knew how many books lost to the world through fire, theft and mishandling? “I…You’re insane!” She blurted out, and immediately regretted it the moment she realized her words.

Her hooves clamped over her mouth as his look turned from stone to weary resignation. His head lowered where he stood and he looked to be about ready to just leave. Twilight stammered her words out as quickly as she could “Ohnononono….P-please, T-Tantalus…I didn’t…Why would you want to die?” She whispered into the silence that hung between them, trying to contain her own horror and disbelief. What was going on out there? What had Shining Armor been able to do to him to weaken him so?

The little earth pony closed his eyes for a moment and exhaled. “I have lived for so long in shadow. No friends. No family. I am tired, Twilight Sparkle. But why should you care? Our time is coming to an end very soon, and you will be reunited with those that love you.” His voice had changed now – no longer the mysterious multi-tone of before, it was now just the voice of a young earth pony. “Before then though, you will perceive perhaps ten or fifteen minutes passing. Then, you will awaken. In that moment, you must decide what to do with what remains of me and my power.”

His hooves turned him on the spot, shaky and weak from something – and his body was starting to show signs of unnatural aging upon it. “I leave that choice in your hooves. Nopony else can make it now. Good Bye, Twilight. May Shadow guide you. “Then, he was gone.

Twilight Sparkle’s Mind – 15 Perceived Minutes until Sunrise

The time had ended for careful research. There was no time for lists, or carefully constructed chains of logic. There was no time to consult with Celestia on the dangers she might face. She could sense her body rousing to wakefulness with every passing moment. She didn’t even know how he had achieved this compression of space-time within her own head.

What could she do? Twilight felt herself torn – unable to justify either course of action. If she did nothing, one of the most ancient repositories of knowledge and magic in the entire world would perish in a blaze of power to no useful end. If she took him up for his bargain, she would be forever changed, marked by the dark powers he wielded. Even if those powers would have no hold on her, it would not matter. She would be judged regardless. Was there no third way? Could her magic, or the magic of the Elements of Harmony which they had surely brought with them save that poor child from his death?

Could he not be saved from his mistakes, as they had saved Nightmare Moon? It was a tempting thought, but there was no time to be sure. For all she knew, exposure to the Element’s power might obliterate him anyway given how long he has stewed in the power. There was no time for a Hail-Celestia play here. She could not place that burden upon her friends. With that single thought, everything crystallized.

She could not let her friends bear the burden of her decision, and bear it they would. If she did not take his power, he would die by their hands however unintentionally. If she took it, there was no telling what monster it would turn her into, and yet…

Luna was not a monster. She had made ill decisions, her powers had run away with her emotions, but she was not a monster. Twilight could learn from her lessons. The Princess would not abandon her. They would find a way to master this power and, in time – purify the negative influences it might have. Her friends would not abandon her. Pinkie pie would probably throw some kind of party just to celebrate her new…looks.

She stared down at the vast tome before her and laid her head upon it, even as her world of dreams slowly faded away. It was an impossible choice. There was no right answer, and Twilight began to think that…ultimately, that was the point. To face her so-sure self with a question no logic or emotion could provide a satisfactory end to.

Tantalus’ story was a tragedy. Yet from that tragedy, a bright mind had spent his lifetime trying to make the best of his mistakes. He had worked to protect the people he loved. He had tried to learn, to grow, and to be strong for his world. That the world did not need him, nor want him was ultimately what brought him low. It was, if she thought about it the same thing that had ultimately driven Luna to madness and darkness.

Would that be her fate? To live for untold centuries – eventually to be driven into darkness beyond reason only to be put down by her own teacher? Was she prepared to sacrifice fifteen centuries of lost knowledge because she feared what her future might bring? She felt hot tears slowly trailing down her cheeks. Was there even a right answer?

Of course there is, Silly. Learn from their mistakes! She lifted her head from the book, staring at it – the voice had almost been the voice of Celestia, speaking into her mind. That was, of course the most obvious answer. But how could she do that? How could she correct their mistakes – the mistakes of a Goddess and of a Demi-god? You know what you need to succeed – your friends… That was true. But they were all mortal ponies! There was nothing she could do to save them from the ravages of age! Are you sure? After all, you are the most brilliant unicorn in all of Equestria…with all that power at your disposal; could you not find a way to keep them and you together down through eternity?

It was…an intriguing thought. A difficult problem of course, without the shadow power to preserve them, immortality might well be impossible. Yet, why could she not imbue them with all the positive aspects of the power and filter out the negatives? There were spells that could filter effects out from other magic, why could she not apply the same principal! It would take a little time, but she could put her other studies on hold for this. She could ensure Equestria had bearers of Harmony for the rest of history! Six bearers of such incredible power and friendship, no force in the world could threaten them ever again!

Her mind raced as the moments drifted by, her dream-scape was cracking and crumbling under her hooves. She had little time. There was, after all – only one logical choice. Before she made it, she would not leave anything to chance. Her horn glowed with a bright purple power as her dreams faded into reality – and a massive iron box clamped itself around the tiny dream library, sealing itself shut against anything that might attempt to corrupt the truth of Twilight Sparkle that lay inside.

The Old Palace, Throne Room – Sunrise.

Twilight’s eyes opened to the world for the first time in what felt like an eternity. The Sun’s rays were just about to peek over the horizon – and she could feel a massive tidal wave of energy building in the forest all around her. Tantalus stood directly opposite of her – and her friends stood around her in a protective semicircle, the Elements of Harmony glowing with incredible power.

For the first time in her life, Twilight felt fully in control of her magic. Her horn began to glow incandescent white as she willed the element of Magic to protect the ones she loved, and a glowing golden shield reminiscent of Celestia’s own works surrounded her group of friends. Tantalus smiled at her as best he could – his body obviously fading and failing as his strange ritual took shape around her.

It had to have taken centuries to build it. Complex arcane formula hung in the air written in shining magical strands, placed at dozens of angles relative to where she floated above the same dais where she had shattered the power of Nightmare Moon so long ago. It was daring, brilliant, insane – but functional. He was going to use the very same power Celestia was tapping into to fuel his one use only creation, a funnel to throw all of that which he was into a new vessel. To defy the dark power that had tortured him his entire life with the knowledge that a new guardian of the people would be born today.

The sunlight burst over the horizon as the spell itself began to take its final shape around her. She could feel the magic flowing through her veins as though it had replaced her blood, and a soft voice spoke into her ear just as the formula began to tighten up around her, forming the ritual sphere all around her body as the magic crashed into her. It spoke softly, and faded away with the last syllable. ~”Thank you, Twilight. Good...luck...”~

~~~

A Column of magic shot up around her as ancient power flowed into her body and changed her within and without. It was like what Twilight imagined the center of the sun must feel like, to be surrounded by magic in the most total, complete way. To be filled with warmth and a suffuse of power so great that any action seemed possible. For the briefest of moments, she could comprehend what vast power Celestia must live with every day of her life. It was almost enough to inspire a little jealousy in Twilight even amidst the singing song of her magic. Almost, but not quite. There were prices that Celestia paid for her power too, and they were prices Twilight did not know if she could ever pay herself.

Those were her last thoughts for quite some time as the magic consumed her and bore her soul up on wings of shadow and magic, and the world changed forever.

Comments

[Golferguy758]

Madre de freaking dios. What a great read. Thanks for this I am eagerly anticipating what is going to happen next. You take this like and favorite and use it as fuel for more!

Seriously though, I hope this goes on for a long while this storyhas an immense amount of potential in it. And I feel as though you I've only begun scratching at the surface of what is potentially an epic tale.

[Lapis-Lazuli and Stitch]

2301857

Thanks so very much, GolferGuy! (Love the profile pic.) Spread the word about the fic, encourage more folks to come and read it!

And there is definitely more to come. Keep your eyes peeled, I will probably be starting a Part 2 of this story in the relatively near future.

[Mossflower]

i've been slowly chewing my way through the story, and i have to say, your 'promise' that it would be riddled with mistakes and far worse than "The Apprentice" in execution and telling was very very wrong; this is awesome! certainly, you can see the improvements when you compare them, but it's almost unfair to call this worse than "The Apprentice".
the one thing which annoys me a tiny tiny bit is how alike it is to "The Apprentice" in its core concept, it's like they are the same concept-story with different emphasizes, at least so far relative to the mirrored progression of "The Apprentice". still, that 'annoyance' is almost not worth mentioning since this is so damn good! not even considering that it's my very favorite kind of story.

[Pnakotic]

Reminds me a lot of how Arthas took up Frostmourne to protect his own kingdom, only for it to end up destroying it. Let's see how a very similar gamble goes this time around.

[jwizard]

2931581

Arthas did NOT take up Frostmourne to protect his people; he took it up out of vengeance. He might have then used the power to protect what he could, but his first reason was to find something that could help him destroy Mal' Ganis. This has no parallel, because Twilight IS taking up the power to protect. It'll still corrupt her, of course, but only in body.