Chapter 10: The Invisible Problem
“Searching is half the fun: life is much more manageable when thought of as a scavenger hunt as opposed to a surprise party.”
- Jimmy Buffett
Chapter 10: The Invisible Problem
Mr Carnage POV
I found myself in an unfamiliar position; on my knees. I wasn’t bowing to anypony though, I was just mentally exhausted. My plan had gone up in smoke in matter of hours, and I could only imagine how well the others were doing. This was all wrong. That bitch had set me up again, but why would she risk jeopardising the entire mission just to get back at me? She was manipulative, I was certain of this now. Was this just more of her mind games? If she wanted to mentally pulverise me, then she certainly did a good job of that.
What was it with me and mares that get some kind of control over me? My mother was first, and now Silver. I keep taking orders from mares, sometimes intentionally and sometimes not so. Illusive didn’t count, as I was following orders with my own will, and he was certainly not female. Sometimes I wonder if I really did what I wanted, considering I was in my other state more often than not. It was the same story really. Follow the leader, and then get stabbed in the back by said leader. I kept looking down at the grass, trying to cool off. I didn’t want to explode on her, which would just make things ten times worse. That’s when I felt a pair of forelegs wrap around me.
They were soft and gentle. Each movement was deliberate and made me feel at ease more and more. Judging by the coat colour, Sun Drop was now hugging my neck and brushing my mane. The situation was awfully surreal the more I thought about it. The changeling we were keeping captive was now trying to comfort me. How bizarre, story of my life I suppose.
I heard Question Mark approach, and when I looked up at him, he gave me a pitiful look. “I’m terribly sorry about Pinkie,” he said. “The first meeting with her is often intense. She means well, but she has a lack of understanding when it comes to personal space. Are you going to be alright?” Sun Drop let go of my neck, and I got back on to my hoofs.
“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I’m sorry I broke down there, I just… things haven’t really been going my way today. Mental exhaustion would be the best way to put it.”
“I imagine that argument with your marefriend didn’t help.”
“Shes NOT my marefriend,” I replied.
“Oh, really? It’s just the way she looked at you… never mind. Is she going to be fine by herself?”
I looked over to where Silver was meant to have flown off, but there was no sign of her. She could handle herself, and her being out of my mane for the present sounded like a wonderful idea that I could get behind. “She’ll be fine. She’s probably off doing some tricky bullshit.” I looked back at the detective. “Anyway, you’re Question Mark, correct?”
“Yes, can I help you?”
“Actually, you can. You see, the three of us aren’t the only new ponies in your humble town. We’ve come here for important business. You could say that we’re here to protect the crown.”
He didn’t say anything at first. He was probably adding it all up in his head, so I allowed him to catch up. “Shouldn’t you be talking to the elements about this sort of thing?” he asked. “Not that I’m not flattered you’d come to me, but if you’re telling me the truth, surely the elements of harmony would be better for this kind of task.”
“They can’t know,” butted in Sun Drop. “They have to be left in the dark.”
“Why?”
“Um, well… it’s more of an espionage task. Secret agent stuff. I mean, you’ve met the elements, right? They’re more suited for all out fighting, not espionage.” Despite the childish language, Sun Drop had made a very good argument.
“Well you do have a point. Yet, I still fail to see exactly how I can help you guys out. I’m just a modest detective, not a fighter or really suited for espionage either.”
“We don’t need you to be any of those things,” I answered. “We need you to be a detective, to use your skills to help us figure something out.”
“And pray tell exactly what it is you want my help with?”
“When I tell you this, you must keep this information to yourself. You cannot tell anypony in this town what I tell you right now, understand?” He nodded his head, but instead of answering, I turned my neck to Sun Drop. “Sun, I want you to explore the town for a bit. Get a feel for the place.”
Sun Drop seemed quite surprised by this. Yet a grin formed in her sweet face. “Alright, I’ll see you at that party then.” She was about to head off when she froze mid-trot. “Oh, when is the party.”
I sighed and reluctantly opened up the card I had been given moments ago. It was pink, and the message was written in different colours. Crudely drawn balloons and smiley faces littered the inside, but I was specifically looking for a place and time. “Says here that the party will take place at “Sweet Apple Acres,” at around seven PM. Well, I suppose that gives us the rest of the day to explore. You're dismissed, Sun Drop.” She nodded happily and trotted off. I let her go because I wanted to give her a reward for caring about me. Something anypony rarely did. She clearly liked this town, why not let her explore at her leisure? At least for today. It hadn’t really occurred to me that she could run off, but then I just knew she wouldn’t. It was just a feeling I had, like she wanted to prove something.
“So, what is it you wanted to tell me?”
I looked back at Question. “There is a changeling, hiding out in Ponyville. We need to locate him or her.”
There was a long silence this time. His face scrunched up in thought and he turned away from me. I could faintly hear him mutter, but despite my acute hearing, it was so gargled and disjointed that I couldn’t make anything out. In that moment, I couldn’t help but look over him again and re-evaluate the shocking resemblance. It was uncanny. It was like looking at my… oh what’s that new-age term… my brother from another mother? Or something like that. He was smaller than me, and despite the fact we had the same mane colour, our coats were very different. Yet our faces were similar, and the whole thing was just a bit too uncanny to ignore. He stopped muttering to himself and turned back to me with a cautious look.
“How do YOU know there is a changeling, here of all places?”
“I can’t tell you that. It’s been confirmed though, and we need to find him or her as soon as possible.”
“Why?”
“Information. Specifically about the location of somepony… or rather, someling that we’re looking for.”
“So there are two changelings you’re looking for?”
“Sort of, but right now we need to find one who was part of the Canterlot invasion, and has had some involvement in the transportation of dangerous material. All I know is that they’re in this town. I need your help to find him or her. Will you help me?”
“…”
“…”
“… Alright. I have no reason to say no. I will refer to Twilight Sparkle later about signs a changeling might display since she’s had experience dealing with them before. I’ll make up an excuse, her desire to teach will overwrite any suspicion. First though, I suppose we should sort out this party business. I’m going to tell you now, don’t try and get out of it. Pinkie is something else, let’s just leave it at that. Perhaps this party could benefit you though.”
We began to walk towards the town. “What do you mean?”
“Most of the town will show up, they always do. This could help us gain a list of suspects.”
“… Fair point.”
“You could also get some questions sorted out there.”
“… Maybe.”
“Maybe that was what your lady friend was trying to do? I don’t think she would throw away a mission just to get at you.”
“…”
That was a very good point, and it took another pony to make me see that. I started to feel guilty, which was much unexpected. She had manipulated me, right? Of course she had, that much had to be true. Yet, all she was really doing was trying to save lives. Maybe she did trust me more. No, surely not. Or maybe… Ugh. My head began to spin as we fell into silence. I didn’t second guess myself often, as I trusted my instincts completely. Now though, I was starting to feel regret for some of things that I had said. Were they as harsh as I remember?
“You’re a failure of an assassin… and a whore!”
“I’d be more insulted you dumb bitch if you actually spoke in a language I understood. Yet another reason why you’re a failure I bet.”
“… Yes, I imagine you did work your flank off as it were.”
"You’re job wasn’t for your skills, it was to seduce me into joining. Probably like every other pony you’ve fucked and then left when your mission was over.”
They sounded worse than I remember. It was the last thing she said directly to me though, that really got me.
“… I thought you were different.”
I started to feel sick. I clutched my stomach and growled, halting in the process. Question stopped too, noticing my unease, but he didn’t say anything as I growled again. I started cursing in my head, screaming at myself and my stupidity. She really had wormed her way through my head. Was this more manipulation? Or was I in the wrong? Quite frankly, I just didn’t know anymore. I ignored the sick feeling and continued on towards town with Question Mark in tow.
---
Fade POV
For a unicorn, this filly was strong. Try as I might, I couldn’t break free of her hold as we went charging down the street. I didn’t want to pull too hard, otherwise I’d hurt the kid, and then I’d look like an asshole child beater. Funny thing about foals, they’re delicate as tartarus, but constantly climb trees and other shit so they’ll break even easier. I was willing to bet his kid was just the same. Mercifully, the filly stopped and I nearly ran straight into the door from the momentum.
“We’re here!” she cried. This place stuck out like a sore hoof compared to the other building. It was all fancy and white and… well it just didn’t fit in a place like this. What I did know for sure was the pony that owned this place was definitely in the money. She might as well have painted this place gold, because I had bits in my eyes. “My sis will fix your coat mister. She makes dresses and stuff, so she’ll make it look even better than before.”
“She makes dresses? She use… gems at all?” I asked, trying to sound as innocent as possible. Wasn’t that hard with a kid though, they’ll buy anything you tell them with a treat dangling before them.
“Yeah, she uses gems too. She’s got a bunch of them.”
“Does she now?” I looked over the building again, before I felt a sly smile spread over my face. “I better go introduce myself then.” The filly beat me to the door and held it open for me. She was a nice kid, but very naïve. Looking around, the place was well-furnished, and was as fancy inside as it was outside. Welcoming to any rich types, but intimidating to anypony not part of the elite. I could instantly hear footsteps approaching us, but my eyes were busy looking for anything good to pinch. Downside was that my jacket was busted, and I couldn’t grab anything till it was fixed. I was stuck window shopping for the moment.
“Welcome to Carousel Bout-“ I looked over to find a drop dead gorgeous mare looking at me in surprise. She was a fine mare to look at. Beautiful face, stunning and curvy body, and even looking at her from the front, I could tell she had a sweet flank. I had to make sure I didn’t start to drool through my bandages when she looked me over with her pretty eyes. “My goodness sir, are you quite alright?” She looked over to her sister and gave her a threatening glare. “Sweetie Belle…”
“It wasn’t me sis!” Sweetie cried in defence. As funny as this conversation might have been, I was more interested in getting my coat fixed.
“Cute sis ya got there. Relax, got caught in a fire is all. Your sis weren’t involved.” Reason seemed to take over her. She cleared her throat and trotted closer to me.
“I’m terribly sorry. My sister can get rather over excited, and she has a… history, let’s leave it at that.” I gave Sweetie a sideways glance, but she was beaming up at me.
Cute kid like that bein’ a terror? Nah, don’t see it. Lively, sure. I tipped my hat to the mare. “The name’s Fade, Fade Away.”
“Rarity, charmed,” she replied while presenting her hoof. I shook it quickly.
“So, your sister here says you can help me with this old thing.” I took my jacket off and held it up, showing the holes in it. “As ya can see, it’s got a lot of holes in it.” She looked as I was showing her a severed head. She looked absolutely revolted. I was kind of surprised honestly. I know it was a bit ratty, but still, I liked it. “Something wrong?”
“Well, you have certainly come to the right place. I assume you wish for me to fix this thing?”
“Yeah, that’d be great.”
“Well, I must refuse.”
“Huh… well, should’ve seen that coming.” I found myself rubbing the back of my head. I didn’t really know what to do now. Should I just leave? Sweetie was blocking the door though, looking on in anticipation.
“That thing is simply ghastly, and very outdated. You require a new jacket entirely.”
“A new jacket? I ain't got the bits for that.”
“I wouldn’t dream of making you pay for it, especially in your current condition,” she said, motioning to my body. The upside of the bandages was that I could get sympathy when I needed it, here was no exception, I hadn’t even tried. She took my coat with her magic and discarded it to one side like it was trash and walked off to her sister.
“Off you go, Sweetie Belle. I have to help my client now.”
The filly let out a quiet ‘aww’ but put up no resistance. “Bye, Mr Fade,” she chimed as she walked out the door. Yeah, she’s way too cute to be a bother.
“Now, Mr Fade, if you would please join me upstairs and I can get your measurements.”
I wasn’t really too thrilled by the idea of standing around doing nothing for who knew how long, but the idea of a new coat willed me forward. I gave one passing look towards my old coat before heading upstairs. I was going to miss that thing. It had been with me through thick and thin, but as they say, out with the old and in with the new. I didn’t have a clue what to expect next when Rarity opened the door, but I was so glad I came.
It wasn’t the room that enticed me. It looked pretty much the same compared to the rest of the boutique. There were mannequins with unfinished dresses on display, bundles of cloth tidily placed into separate sections, a box of different gems, but there was one particular gem that nearly caused my jaw to drop on the floor.
My senses had picked up on it as soon as the door opened. Just in the corner on my vision - placed near a nasty looking white cat - was a giant red ruby. A fire ruby if I remember correctly. The thing about gems is that they’re not a rarity at all, they’re actually quite easy to find in your nearest quarry. However, there were certain types of gems that are rare, and the bigger they were, the more bits there were on offer.
That thing was humongous, and I ain't poetic, but it was love at first site when I walked through that door. Everything else disappeared as I just gazed at the ruby. Everything about it was just perfect, absolutely perfect.
“Oh, how did this thing get here?” I snapped out of my daze when I heard Rarity’s voice. “I must have left it out by mistake. I’ll put it back in my safe later,” she chimed as she levitated it with her magic. Her cat seemed annoyed for some reason, like that thing had any use for gems. She moved it to a desk on her far right. I couldn’t take my eyes off it as hard as I tried, no matter what I did, my vision refused to move from that jewel.
“Mr Fade, please come over here.” I finally got a hold of myself when she called to me again. I took a breath and walked onto a pedestal she was pointing at. Once there, her eyes began to look me over, studying every part of me. “This will be difficult since I cannot see you under your bandages. Tell me darling, what colour is you fur?”
“Uh… well…” I couldn’t remember. Crazy, right? I’ve been invisible for so long that I’d completely forgotten what I used to look like. “White. Yeah, I’m a chalk white,” I lied. I might have been, but it was unlikely.
“Hmm, I think black would work. Yes, a colour that goes well with nearly anything. What do you think?”
“I guess black works.”
“Excellent, let’s get started!~”
As soon as she spoke those words, she levitated a nearby tape measurer and began checking the size of my legs. I wasn’t really paying attention though; it was that gem that had me again. It sparkled and shined and was practically begging me to take it away.
Crap, I can’t do this now. Normally I’d be unable to take my eyes off this chick, but the damn jewel! She hasn’t sold it for some reason, Celestia knows what, but it’s Hearth’s Warming for me right now. I began to weigh up my options. Okay, I got Carnage on my back and one fuck up could land me in the hospital. I have no way of hiding it since I don’t have my coat, and who knows how long I’m gonna be here. Eventually, that designer would notice it’s gone missing. Actually, she seems kind of important, have I seen her somewhere before?
It was weird because I felt like I should know who she is. White body, purple mane, great flank, actually that’s like an award winning flank right there. Anyway, she seemed really familiar. She must have done something important or OH SHIT THAT’S THE ELEMENT OF GENEROSITY!
I thanked Celestia that I didn’t scream that out loud and began to ponder my new predicament. Keeping minimum contact with elements just went out the window, so it looked like all I would have to do is keep the chit chat light. Keep my distance from her and I should be…
“So what do you do, darling?”
I realised she was across from me, looking at a bunch of cloth. I cleared my throat and tried to ignore the sweating.
“Me? I’m sort of like an agent.” Why did I say that? No idea, and I immediately regretted it when her eyes began to sparkle.
“Really, how interesting. An agent of what exactly?”
Think of something! Think of something!
“Uh, I can’t really say. I just sort of… find things.”
“Alright, I won’t pry, I’m sure you have your reasons.” I sighed in relief upon hearing those words. “Since I asked though, do you have any questions for moi?”
I immediately came up with one. “Where’d ya get the jewel?” It just slipped out, but Rarity was happy to answer.
“That was a gift from my Spikey Wikey.”
“… Coltfriend?”
“No, although he wishes. As much of a gentle drake he is, he is also far too young. Legally speaking that is.”
“Ah, he has a young love kind of crush on you.”
“Yes, you could say that. He gave it to me after an incident with these dreadful diamond dogs. He’s simply a gem, and I’ll never be able to repay his kindness, but he’ll technically be a kid for the next… fifty years if Twilight is to believed.”
Fifty years as a kid, what a childhood. I figured she was talking about a dragon, and the name Twilight rang more than a few bells. I felt myself relax a little and allowed the mare to do her work. The jewel was a gift then, I surmised. Be harder to pinch it then. I thought she might of thought of it as just another gem, but maybe she still doesn’t really know how much it’s worth. Might be a bit easier to ste- What in tartarus?
I felt like a banana being peeled. I cocked my eye to find that cat had literally sliced through a bandage and was now pulling the edge with its teeth. This usually wouldn’t be a problem, as I would normally be heavily wrapped, meaning two or so ripped pieces of tape wouldn’t show, but this had been a hasty job in the woods, so I was thinly wrapped. Before I could react, the bandages began to tumble down. I desperately tried to grab on a cover up, but to no avail. My entire front right hoof was gone, and Rarity was looking straight at it.
“Please don’t fai-“
She hit the floor like a sack of potatoes.
---
Doctor POV
“Zecora, get away from that thing!”
I leapt from the bush and rolled in front of her. Screwdriver in one hoof, I aimed it straight at the small, furry creature in front of me.
“Now, I don’t know what you are, but I’m a Time Lord. I’m over nine hundred years old. I’m from the planet Gallifrey in the constellation kastabrous. I am the oncoming storm, the bringer of darkness, the destroyer of worlds, I am the Doctor! Whatever you’ve got planned, forget it-”
“Doctor dear, there is no reason to fear,” cut in the zebra behind me. She rolled her eyes and pushed past me so she was standing over the small furry creature. “This is a pichu, and it has no desire to hurt you.”
The creature resembled a small yellow mouse. It stood on two legs but ran on all fours. It looked up at me with a cute, but confused, expression. If one looked closely, you could see tiny electrical sparks crackle off its circular red cheeks. Its little black stripes complemented its yellow coat, and I chuckled when I noticed its tail was in the shape of a lightning bolt. There were a lot of strange and marvellous creatures on this planet, but nothing like this should exist here. Natural conclusion, it was an alien I hadn’t encountered yet.
“Oh… looks like an alien to me,” I said with a frown. I was disappointed now. I had made a big speech and everything.
“You’re not quite exact. He is the creation of a friend in fact.” Zecora gently stroked the top of its head with hoof, and whispered in her native tongue. I understood of course, and she was recalling an ancient lullaby. “Now, lift yourself from you glum, it’s time to go back to where you came from.” The yellow mouse smiled brightly and hugged the zebra’s leg. It then shot off past me, deep into the heart of the forest.
Looking around me, the trees had seemingly gotten thicker the further I had ventured into the forest. There were no clear pathways here, just tiny sources of light pushing their way through leaves and branches. Some aspects felt like they came straight from a fairytale, but this forest held dark things within. I was half expecting a Zygon to pop out at any second. This time, I’d try and avoid kissing it.
“Well, that was interesting. Is that why you’re out here then?”
I fondly looked back on the time I was stranded in Ponyville. It wasn’t like when I was working for U.N.I.T. It was a much more peaceful time, minus the cyberman invasion. Normally I’d be bored, but the characters of this world fascinated me to no end, and adventure was always close by. Zecora was one of the many friends I had made in that time. I found myself popping over and watching her make her brews whenever I had a spare moment. Honestly, it was probably some of the most intelligent conversation I’ve had since I came to this universe. She was naturally insightful, educating me on the creatures that inhabited the world. She never mentioned that mouse, but I could tell that was on a need to know basis.
“My quest for herbs initially came first, but I noticed that creature was suffering from a terrible thirst. When I gave him water that was when you came crashing in, making a very frightful din.”
“Sorry, force of habit I suppose. It’s good to see you again, Zecora,” I said with a smile.
“You too, Doctor,” she said with a tilt of her head. “So now that I’ve collected some honey from the bees, what brings you here to the Everfree?”
“Oh, you know, saving some young fillies, exploring an uncharted area with high concentrations of magic, listening to you somehow always rhyme. The usual I suppose.” A little bit of me wanted to find an orange, but I thought that would be cruel.
“I know you wandered off from your group. Sometimes I swear you exist only to snoop?”
“… Now how did you know I was part of a group?”
“I… uh… well, wait! Is that Pinkie Pie?”
I turned to find a pink blur navigating the brown trunks in her path, and she was heading straight for me.
---
Spitfire POV
Oh yeah, this mare was good, like Wonderbolt levels of good.
I felt the tip of a spear just brush my cheek. A centimeter closer and it would have broken my skin, any further and… well… trouble. I swung blindly at Shadow and connected with a right hoof to her face. It was a weak punch though, as I was too busy dodging the blunt end of the spear. I failed and it connected straight to my back.
“Ah!”
I couldn’t dwell on the shot of pain, I had to give as good as I got. I immediately used the momentum of the strike to cartwheel and punt Shadow straight in her chin. I got her good that time as she flew away several meters. She stopped herself and began rubbing her jaw. I couldn’t help but smile smugly, but she sure wasn’t done. I admired that. She didn’t let a bit of pain hold her down for long and she came straight back for another attack.
She wasn’t trying to kill me, I mean why should she? This was only a spar to settle the score. She didn’t think I could cut it in a fight, so I was going to prove her flank wrong. Maybe I got a bit overconfident though, because when she charged me, all I did was hold my hoof up, waiting for her to collide with it. A rookie move and I paid for it when, just before she collided, she ducked below and punched me straight in the gut. That knocked the wind straight out of me. She collided with another shot to my face that sent me reeling.
My instincts were screaming at me to erect a wall of fire between me and Shadow, but the two ponies I caught in the corner of my eye reminded me exactly why I couldn’t. Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were watching from the ground in awe. Fluttershy was covering her eyes with a foreleg, but was peeping just over it. Rainbow Dash was practically drooling at the display. I wasn’t sure if she was enjoying the match or getting turned on, maybe both. Needless to say, I couldn’t just demonstrate that I could burst into flames at will, especially in front of civilians, so I had to keep that to myself. Besides which, it’d be kind of cheating.
We came out to this clearing when I suggested we battle it out. A sparring match with no rules apart from seriously wounding or killing your opponent, I even let Shadow use her spear. There was a lake just by us, and the Everfree was close by also. Shadow had taken off her armour, saying that it would be foals play with it on. I resisted arguing that time. I had definitely surprised her thus far, but now she was on the offensive as she sent another strike with the blunt end of her spear straight for me.
This time I dodged it, but instead of counter attacking, I fled, assessing my options. I was faster, but she was stronger, possibly tougher in general. I had to outsmart her. I looked around for anything I could use, and then it hit me, literally, she was pretty fast and she struck me in the jaw again. Luckily, my eyes caught the lake just below and I got an idea. I let out another quick kick that was more to buy me time than anything else and flew downwards.
“Is that all you’ve got,” called out Shadow.
“Oh, I’ve got a lot more sister,” I replied, stopping short of the water. “If you’re not too busy playing with yourself with that oversized dildo, how about you come down and face me.”
That sure did it. She really did not like me insulting her spear.
She let out a noise that sounded close to a roar and zoomed straight for me. She switched the sides of her spear when she realised its pointed end was facing me, but in that moment, my speed kicked in and I dodged out of the way as she splashed into the water. She let out a squeak as she collided and was engulfed into the lake below.
Immediately I began to laugh out loud, but stopped myself before I fell into hysterics. I couldn’t get distracted now, gloating would come later. Shadow’s damp fur and wet wings were going to hinder her flying ability which, overall, neutralised her fighting ability. She was putty in my hoofs now, and as Shadow submerged, she looked like a wet cat.
“This has been fun Shadow, but we both know you-“ I narrowly dodged her spear as she flung it at me. I turned around as she came straight at me and charged at my stomach again. She caught me by surprise that time, and despite her slow movements, my brain didn’t register quick enough and she tackled me into the lake.
Looking back now, Shadow and I splashing around in a lake was kind of hot, even to a straight mare like me. It wasn’t so hot at the time though, as she was full on throttling me in the lake, trying to make me pass out. We were in the water though so it was easy to escape her grip, and I gave her an elbow for good measure. We broke up to the surface and all hell broke loose at that point. Hoofs went flying, water splashed everywhere, and I was half expecting blood to start gushing.
“STOP!”
We both froze when we heard a high pitch scream. We turned our heads and on the edge of the lake was Fluttershy, glaring at us. “Both of you stop this right now. You told me that this would be a friendly spar like Rainbow Dash did in her martial arts classes, but this has gotten out of control. You’re both acting like foals.”
“Now hold on a minute here,” interrupted Shadow. “You have no right to-“ Suddenly, she went wide eyed and shook in absolute terror. How I would regret looking in the direction she was looking as I froze up too.
Fluttershy had the most terrifying stare I had ever encountered. Her blue eyes were so innocent at one moment, then debilitating the next. My muscles froze up except for the ability to start shaking uncontrollably.
“You two have clearly shown you can both fight, but also have very hot heads. I am about to let you go now, and when I do, I want you to turn to each other and apologise to one another. You should be acting like friends, not treating each other as enemies.”
She shut her eyes and I could suddenly move my muscles again. Without another thought, we turned to each and said “sorry, sorry, sorry, I’m really sorry,” in unison. She began to blush and so did I.
“To save ourselves from further embarrassment, how about we walk out of this lake and never speak of this again,” suggested the bat pony.
“Agreed, as long as you admit I can fight.”
“Yeah, I have no issue agreeing with that. Let’s get out of here.”
Instead of flying, we opted to swim to shore but, as soon as we got to land, we were assaulted by an excited cyan mare. “Ohmygoshohmygoshogmygoshohmygosh! That was the most epic thing I’ve ever seen. Did you see that Flutters? I mean they were shooting around and kicking and Spitfire looked SO AWESOME!”
Rainbow Dash was flying around us like a fan filly, gushing over every single detail of our fight like every moment was pure gold. I was used to this, but Shadow was blushing like crazy upon hearing such praise. She excused herself so she could collect her armour. I watched her walk away, and felt a new respect grow for her. She was no slouch, and she could have my back in a scrap. I hoped she might feel the same way, but I couldn’t be certain.
“Wow, that was amazing!” A very high-pitch voice chimed behind me. When I turned around I saw lots of pink. A curvy mare with a springy like mane was smiling at me.
“Heh, thanks I guess.” I didn’t feel very good after being scolded like a foal, but saying thanks couldn’t hurt. “I recognise you. You’re Pinkie Pie, right?”
“Yeppers! I’m here to give you all your invites!”
“Invites?” She handed me a pink card and did the same for Dash and Fluttershy.
“Let me guess, Pinks. This is an invite for a welcome party for Spitfire and co.”
“Yep, I’ve got it all set up for you.”
“Awesome, I am so there.”
“Oh, I would love to come as well,” agreed Fluttershy. I looked a bit confused but I didn’t see the harm in it.
“I invited the rest of your friends too, but I couldn’t find the spider guy. The cutie mark crusaders said they didn’t know what I was talking about when I asked where he was. They’re such silly fillies. Ah well, you tell him I said hi.”
“Wait, how do you know-?” I tried to ask but I was cut off.
“Oh look, another friend,” she said, pointing at Shadow putting her armour back on. “See ya at the party.”
As she zoomed off, I looked back down at the invite and smiled. Well, this is gonna be interesting.
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Great chapter as always! Have a
I have to criticize your first person.
Sentences like
or
don't feel natural, or like anything anybody would be thinking.
And then sentences like these
don't feel natural when you already have characters thinking like this
Just want to say, the first person writing here has a lot of telling and exposition going on. I still like the story, and your third person ain't bad, I just find the first person writing here annoying.
3899521 Who knows?
I actually put off playing ESO for a few minutes to read this.
Ulysses is a hero from Greek mythology.
Awesome story I eagerly await the next chapter
You have no idea how stupid I felt after realizing who Question Mark was! Like come on brain, work, you were reading a story focused on him, which linked to this!
Also, this is really damn awesome, and wonderful. A few spelling errors here and there, but really, the plot has me, I could care less about small errors. Oh, and the many references are great as well.
Feel bad for Silver though, gotta feel bad for her.
How's the next chapter coming
4084328 Roughly 1500 words so far
Okay
4235150
Carnage isn't the friendly sort
4249750 I think I'm overdoing with the video game references, but thank you very much. Gonna aim for more book references as there really should be more in this.
update maybe, please?
4363327 It STARTS before that, yes.
4655436 I have no idea what I can do about that I'm afraid.
I reallllly want to read this, but am wary...what are the chances of it being finished/coming off of hiatus?
crap i was sort of looking to do something like this but i search it up and someone is already doing it ?
Hopefully it continues! ;)
Черт побери. Я только вошла во вкус и он закончился.
Так спокойно... Ты не будешь ругаться... Ты знала чего ждать, когда посмотрела на статус. Не глупи... Не начинай использовать неприличные выражения. *Вдох*
Просто... ААААААААААААААААААААААААААААА! ЭТО СЛУЧИЛОСЬ СНОВА! Я СНОВА НАТКНУЛАСЬ НА ОХРЕНЕТЬ КАКОЙ ФАНФИК И ЕГО ЗАМОРОЗИЛИ БЛЯТЬ! ПОЧЕМУ СУДЬБА ТАК НЕ СПРАВЕДЛИВА КО МНЕ?!