A new evil arises and must be stoped. The mane six must recover the elements of harmony to save Equestria, through unconventional means, and with a little help from some new friends. Also i suck at writing descriptions but if the title and the image doesn't give away what the story will be about then just read it.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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This fix could definitely have potential! The characters all seem very IC and their voices really shine through.
Would you mind if I left a longer critique on some grammatical and structural errors I noticed? I don't want to be too pushy.
175500
*fic
Whoops.
175500
not at all in fact if you pm me your email or some other way i can let you read the next chapter i could send it to you for editing/prereading. but also like i said in the beginning dysgraphias a bitch but im not going to use it as a crutch and pawn all my mistakes off with it so be gently brutal
also im just glad that people are reading it
My biggest complaint is that the scenes felt a tad rushed and the transitions didn't quite feel as smooth as they could have. Also, the entire part where Applejack and Twilight argue about 'French or fancy' comes out of no where as no one says anything in french.
175626
i will have to agree i suck at transitions but the 'French or fancy' part is a butchered version of the saying "its all Greek to me" and i included it because i needed to have Twilight and Applejack preoccupied by something so that Fluttershy would not just sit in the background for the majority of the scene. in the end it was suppose to be a comedic bit that functioned like two characters arguing in a movie while a third character goes and discovers something important.
This seems hilarious so far. You have a track.
176293
glad you liked it i am working on chapter 2 right now and it is about an eighth of a quarter done, and in chapter 2 there will be mayhem and property damage YAAA mindless destruction
Oh my god yes.
Continue this.
176851
will do glad you like it
wow i just down loaded a text to speech software and i will be using it when i edit chapter three
I really like the idea of the story, can't wait for the next part! Also, as far as grammer, not too much. A run-on sentence here, misspelled word there, nothing too distracting though!
242283
well hay im very glad that you liked it pleas suggest it to your friends, your family, your dog, and anyone who would enjoy the story and keep falowing the story youll be glad you did