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I'm not proud of this fic by any means, it was my first, and by far my least favorite. Go ahead and hate it, I have to partially agree with you.
A chronicle of the precursing events and the ultimate conflict which left the world in the hooves of ponies. The first story of many which will revolve around this conflict, The War of the Fallen Race details one man's struggle to survive in a world fighting against him and his race.
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Without reading it I'm thinking Assassin's Creed.
OC and other? Sounds scary.
Damn, well the first try never goes as planned.
Yeah... But how did she forget about the other humans who actually give a damn?
@Forlance Sometimes, its a just a simple matter of Them or Us.
Looking forward to see if you continue you this, I was always the sort of HFY (Humanity Fuck Yeah) type of guy, and it is interesting to see how both genres could come together.
To me....it has a promising start. Let's see how this can be developed further. I'm liking this idea so far..
So far it's a good story and i think you should continue to write more. It really interested me.
@ForlanceAbice I meant for that to be a satirical statement. The many may care and voice themselves, but the few in power will always be louder in their actions.
The storie makes it sound like we loose too easily. Any enemy of humantiy that can't destroy the planet, or everyone without hurting themselves will find it more trouble then they can handle. Even with magic attacks human's will besure to take more of the enemy down with us. Look up some WWll clips. We would NOT die easy. The ponies should at least loose 69% of their forces if the war you write of was one of survival and not conquest or for resorces. Also take some pride in your species boy we ain't all bad.
@MrSpartan Its gets better, I have a plan that explains the rise of the other subspecies of pony AND how we manage to get our asses handed to us in the end. 182984
Definitely interesting. Could do with some proof reading. Also, going to nitpick a little. I don't think they use M16s anymore, but more modern versions of said weapon.
=( I dont want the humans to lose
Dont kill the humans. It will be too much like James Cameron's "Avatar" *shudder*
I fucking love this so much mang.
Awesome story dude!
Tracking and you deserve a cookie or something. Sadly I can not give a cookie because smashing one in the screen doesn't work D:.
While I want the Human Race to survive and kick ass without bubblegum, I really like your mane. I mean story.
199448 This
198033 You know, I accept stars and referrals as reasonable substitutes for cookies.
*Throws cookies at screen* I KEEP THROWING BUT NONE ARE GETTING TO YOU!
Anyway, awesome story.
Awesome another chapter!
Love how they named their daughter "Hurricane" as in commander hurricane!
Who in the flying fudge would clop to something like this?
That's just sick.
Anyway, awesome story and another awesome chapter.
Man the human forces don't know how to wage conventional warfare, not to mention they know very little about the enemy tactics, which they should be quite aware of given they've been fighting them for a while (I mean the cloud thing should have been obvious). If I were them I'd not throw my army at them en masse, I'd bombard the shit out of their positions for a few days even (as long as possible), holding the army back while waiting for them to make the first move. Preliminary bombardment would be accompanied by various probing and skirmishing attacks by infantry and light armor in order to harass their lines or provoke their units, either way fraying their divisions and tiring them out. All the while (given that the enemy is concentrated in one position), a portion the attack helicopter squadrons (as well as infantry via apc's) would be sent around their lines in order to establish various points of attack. Mind you, the main army wouldn't even be in their view (as our weapons out-range all of theirs, artillery being able to hit from miles away), therefore they would have a difficult time doing anything about the bombardment or the flanking (as they can't even see the main army well, and any scouting or raid attempts could easily be routed via patrols and anti-air). Bottom line, they hold a defensive position, thus tactics should not be focused on throwing everything at their strong points, but wearing down their forces with constant artillery and skirmishes. This will vastly reduce their fighting capability, moral and resources. After a period of doing this, forces would be branched off into divisions, therefore not throwing one massive chunk at them, but holding many auxiliary and reserve forces. A head on assault is unavoidable, but it can be assuaged by attacking on various fronts (thus the flanking and skirmisher divisions) and weakening their defenses (artillery barrage). With their already weakened defenses, a standard advance led by an armored spearhead with infantry and air support (plus artillery cover) would easily break their ground forces (and the tunnels dug beneath the lines by the diamond dogs would have been collapsed by the artillery). The flanking attacks would force them to split their air forces, thus reducing their effectiveness on the main advance. All forces would, however, not charge right into their lines right away, as CQC is their strong point. Holding positions far enough to use midrange weapons and tanks would be best, and these units would unload a steady barrage on all of their forces (thousands of tanks, infantry and choppers firing on a concentrated defensive position would be devastating). As per how things went in your version, the dragons and air infantry wouldn't pose much of a threat, as they'd be split by various angles of attack. Once their forces start to break, a Blitzkrieg maneuver would be sent a their lines. The shock value of charging tank divisions and intense air and artillery support would deal the finishing blow, driving them back completely. Once this is done, the army would be deployed to completely surround their remaining defense. Any remaining resistance would be obliterated, and if necessary their cave positions would be subject to copious amounts of artillery (or if the Geneva convention doesn't matter anymore, simply use gas or flamethrowers/napalm to kill everything in the underground, a very simple and relatively inexpensive option). This is all, however, how I'd carry out the attack, and I'm not targeting you at all. I like the story, though it does present some really unrealistic events (like how does a force that can't take on 500 000 men wipe out over 6 billion humans and potentially hundreds of millions (with conscription) of military units with such ease, not to mention why the hell are the ponies completely fine with the genocide of an entire race just because we had them in captivity due them being animals (We'd not do so if they had human qualities), especially given that their views are biased and based on the assumption that all humans are "evil" and out to kill them [of course now they are out to kill them as they have full reason to, as the ponies in their "justified" actions have become a million times worse than Adolf Hitler by committing complete genocide...we never did that to them when they were animals]). Maybe the 'creator' should have taken a less...extreme response (as its response is one on such an immoral scale that even the evil "man" wouldn't do), or maybe the ponies shouldn't have attacked right off the bat, either way all of this could have been avoided (as humanity isn't the evil thing that they perceive it as, most humans are good), or better dealt with by humanity as in reality the anti-human forces wouldn't last long at all). Whatever, good story, I just can't help but get annoyed by the unrealistic perspective of humanity...yeah I'm very pedantic in that sense...and I shouldn't be given that this is fan fiction of a show about prismatic ponies and magic...
182984
What he said, though I don't think it's at all possible for a bunch of magical creatures (with primitive weapons and tactics) to wipe out an entire race that militarily trumps them in every way.
217754 Simple explanation, willful suspension of disbelief. Also, advanced targeting has been removed from the equation, most if not all of military bombardment must be done via LoS, (Line of Sight). Since supply routes have been severely damaged, stocks of ammunition and fuel are down to the last drops, necessitating the need for CQC and en masse strikes without the exceptionally wasteful tactics of preemptive scouting and raiding. And the mass forward attack is a tactic put forth by the criminally insane and power hungry mind of General Winters who honestly believes an all out attack pushing the enemy forces to the center followed by energy containment is the absolute best tactic. As for the genocide, I plead the fifth amendment. Besides, I'm a fiction writer, your insight will help me cover my ass in the next chapter.
218139
Indeed. Thanks for the explanation, though artillery doesn't need LoS (data attained by forward scouts, topography statistics and trajectory calculations would suffice for the absence of advanced targeting, that's how it was done in the old wars. Given that there are a large number of artillery batteries and the large target area, pinpoint accuracy doesn't matter. Military units are trained to use such methods of targeting should EMP disrupt targeting systems and satellite feeds). Either way, they could have used better tactics and a less careless assault in order to properly degrade their defenses, which in turn is the General's fault. My question is how the hell does an idiot like that get into a commanding position over the fate of humanity? Perhaps someone who's actually studied military theory and strategy should do it, or is high command that stupid? If that is the case, General Winters is an idiot for using primitive military ideology and careless disregard for the variables in enemy defense (not to mention careless use of valuable military assets). Just because they were low on resources doesn't negate the necessity for preemptive scouting (it's endemic to victory), which would not take much in terms of resources (as only a handful of units are required). Also, while an en masse attack may be deemed 'necessary', one could still carry out flanking and raiding maneuvers on their flanks and exposed areas simultaneously, causing further confusion in the enemy whilst dividing their forces. Obviously Winters is complete shit at commanding, his mental state making him unfit for military service let alone high command. I'm not even going to argue about the fifth amendment...God why the hell am I arguing about any of this?!
Epic.
Ok this story is starting to tick me off. The suspension of belief needed for the events and tactics is reaching ridiculous proportions. Why couldn't these "peaceful" ponies try harder for peice? The "demon" humans tryed harder then the ponies. The charge was just fucking stupid on the part of the humans. We have long range artelary and sniper rifles for a reason. Also 3 words for a back up plan. NUKE THE FUCKERS! There are nuclear silos scatered all over the continant. Many can be remotely launched and they can cross closer counties now so hitting a mountain (where all the enemy forces are covenaintly in one target spot I might add) in our own country is very much NOT out of the question. No targeting you say? You'd only need one bomb to get through on a fast drone to manually drop it on them. Something hits it in the sky before it drops the bomb? Have you seen the giant freaking explosions those things have? Being shot an exploding in the air might even be worse due to the radation fallout that would blanket the area more fiercly. Also did I mention that as of the Obama administration we have about 5,110 warheads ready for use? I'll keep reading for now but only just bearly. I'm sorry but that's the truth.
Damn, now the ponies have god-mode and divine intervention. This is just like Avatar, only it doesn't make sense at all...Oh well, it's magic so it doesn't have to make sense I guess. I still think that they should have flooded the caves with incendiary bombs or toxic gas, that would've fixed the problem. I am a bit vexed by your use of magic to automatically rape everything, but that makes good reading (as I get more involved in it)....Still a good story, I just hope humanity doesn't get completely wiped out.
suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/4571998/images/1242534005480.jpg
How far are you taking this story? To the end of the war where humanity hides away underground or way beyond that, to when they return or something. I think that it would be interesting if you continued it to include their return to the world (in present equestria), such a plot contains a lot of potential (though I'd hope it won't be the same as this story, with humans being unrealistically portrayed as evil...I mean seriously we ain't that bad. If anything present Equestria would be an ironically hypocritical society, being it that is was built on the wonton bloodshed of billions). Either way, it's a good story in that it always gets a reaction out of me (even if it's one of dismay for my kin).
This story is awesome and you should feel awesome, and to any haters: I myself am anti-humanistic, but not on the "All humans should die and someone take our place" kind of bullshit, I am the one that thinks humanity has already done enough bullshit that as a whole it should start paying it's debts socially all the way to the entire planet. But we all have our opinions and such, In my opinion humanity still has time to fix many problems that it still faces now and will face in the future, and blah blah blah I could go on for hours on this, but I won't I've already typed out too much stuff that no one really would like to read.
My point that I want to say is: you win some, you lose some, just appreciate how the writer writes, I was not confused when reading this story and I have a short as hell attention span, ya'll need to read slower.
Anywho, PegasusKlondike your story is awesome and I patiently wait to see more chapters!
First
Awesome another chapter!
I don't really have any real feedback to give besides keep up the awesome work and stuff.
When will we get to the part with the humans waking up and emerging again.
245975
This.
I listned to this song near the end...
it fit so well
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmvE7_H_h-A&feature=related
I LOVE IT MOARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
"The Princess' word is law."
Ah the infinite benefits of monarchy
Can't wait tell next chapter
This is a great story, but I am reduced to a frothing rage whenever I read it.
The very actions of the ponies betray the truest thing about all life: It is evil. Every last living thing in the universe is evil. By committing genocide on humans, the other races have become exactly what they've been fighting against. They have become the demons. They have become the monsters. They have become the animals. What humans have done is unacceptable, but now the true evil of all the races is shown. They would murder and burn and pillage, they would kill and destroy, they would commit hatred against an entire race, even though not every one is the same. They kill children, women, men, the young, the old, the sick, the ones who try to do good... All because they are human.
I personally now want to murder every pony, dragon, griffon, and every other sentient being in this fic. I want to rip out the hearts of Celestia and Luna, and eat them before their dying eyes. I want to kill this sick and twisted goddess, who does not recognize that every thing she created was evil, and how she discriminates between them. Humanity is evil, but that does not mean we have no capacity for good. Good does not come from us, but from the Divine. Human and pony alike, we all live for ourselves. We are evil. Evolution has no explanation for kindness, for mercy, for doing something for someone other than their self. It has no explanation for Love. Chemical signals? At a microscopic level, yes, but WHY do we feel these things? WHY do we forgive, when we know it will only hurt us? Why do we sacrifice so much, even though it gains us nothing? Why do we die for something, disregarding our own survival? WHY DO WE LOVE? Did we evolve from some primal ooze? Are we accidents? Are we just some random combination of genes? NO. If we are animals, if we are only out for our own survival and gain, then how does one explain the unexplainable? We were created. Not as some bizarre accident of fate, but as a labor of LOVE. It saddens me to say this, but this story makes me sad to be alive. All of us, human, pony... we are all alive. Just because one man will hurt another, does not mean ther is not another who wishes to help. Condemning a race, in it's entirety, deserves nothing more than hatred, rage, contempt and damnation. I am human. I am evil. That does not mean I do no good. Your view of life is very twisted, but your writing is powerful. Powerful enough to make me write this. You sure know how to bring about my emotions. I haven't read all of your story, but I hope the ending is not as soul-wrenching and not as sorrowful as the rest of the story.
God bless you, friend. In war and in peace.
253534 Dude.
The ponies and other races didn't commit genocide there.
It was Discord, Discord killed the humans.
Celestia wanted to save them.
And to have true peace.
GAH I LOVE IT.I MUST HAVE MOAR!!!!!!!
254390 Oh? Sorry, didn't read that far yet.
253534
4.bp.blogspot.com/-9-zfgrUE2nU/ThRRHYocsgI/AAAAAAAAAfU/ODR5erIYUPs/s1600/boom.jpg
255156 :D Thanks.
I'm an Astartes, sir. Hail the Emperor!
Anyways, yeah. I heard about the ponies destroying entire cities and killing people who were taking care of them. How is it slavery if we pay in food, love, protection and a place to sleep? That was a riding school and that means KIDS. I will fucking murderify ANY pony who kills a child. I will paint the streets with their blood, and hang their severed head high for all their brethren to see.
And I don't need to join the IG to get a flashlight to kill them either.
As you can all probably see, I'm quite the emotional lycanthrope. I will enjoy any discussion you have to offer.
255178Cand cthe ponies called the humans barbaric. The nerve of some ponies.
255521 Can't tell if sarcasm. What? So a pony killing a human child is FINE?
Screw that shit. But if you're not sarcastic, then I'd respond with this:
LIFE IS BARBARIC. Only a few even TRY to live against that barbarity.
255609 Maybe I should revise that a little. Clear the murkiness.
255848 Ah. Possibly, but then that would take away from the emotional grip you've got on me.
255864 No, I never intended to imply that children or innocents were hurt by intelligent creatures, this was a war of pacification, not annihilation. It would only serve to make humanity more stalwart in their efforts to destroy the ponies. That is something I should alter.