60
It was the day of the wedding and everything seemed to be going well. Barb and several other fillies were in flower girl dresses. Twilight was sitting the crowd taking notice of the clear weather, she made absolutely sure no changelings were involved and that meant checking every pony here. There were no changelings, so at least the changeling held up its end of the deal. As for Tress she was currently with Fleur. Vinyl and Rainbow were sitting with Twilight in the crowd. Rainbow was wearing a dress and Vinyl was wearing a suit.
“Hey, how come I had to get stuffed into a dress and she didn’t?” Rainbow was whinnying about Vinyl wearing a tux. She also wished she could muss up her mane after Twilight made it all girly looking, though she didn’t mind when Twilight was brushing her mane previously.
“Because she actually looks handsome in it and she can actually pull off a stallion’s voice so ponies wouldn’t question her on it.” Twilight commented to her while pondering how Vinyl got so good at sounding like a stallion. “Besides getting the dress off should be easier for you, we’re going to need you to help us catch Fleur’s ex if he causes any trouble or makes an appearance to interrupt the wedding.”
“Yeah and I really do make this tux look good.” Comically enough Vinyl pulled off the perfect voice to make her sound like a stallion and despite her rather slim appearance; she thought she pulled it off perfectly. Her mane was in its same spiked style it usually was and it stood out amongst the ponies who had had there’s styled eloquently for this day. Twilight hadn’t managed to talk her into getting her mane styled like Fleur had with Rainbow.
“I think you look really pretty in dress anyway Dashie.” Fluttershy came walking up to them to take her own seat; her mane was braided and slightly curled. Rainbow calmed down knowing that Fluttershy could smell when a pony was upset and she would have gone rabid on her with a massage if she kept acting up.
Octavia was with a small band holding up her instrument waiting for the signal to start playing her cello, two stallions and another mare made up an elegant string instrument quartet. She really thought Vinyl had to be the odd one at the wedding given it was very easy to spot her in the crowd, things were about to get started so she had to focus on her music.
“Are you sure you’re ready for this Fleur, it’s a pretty big commitment.” Tress was getting the final touches underway with Fleur before she led her down the aisle to matrimony.
“Ah yes, I feel so alive today and quite giddy. I can’t wait to say yes and then kiss my stallion at the altar. Are you sure you’re ready for this Tress, is being a bride’s mare troubling you that much?” Fleur just shook her head and smiled. “Don’t worry, just don’t say anything and we’ll be at the altar before you know it. I’m so glad you’re here for me today and that you’re willing to do this for me.”
“Yeah, I’d do just about anything for my friends. We’ll see whether or not things are going to go correctly… ” Tress narrowed her eyes at the sky and the dark cloud that wasn’t there a minute ago.
Fancy’s family wasn’t entirely full of nobles and quite a surprising number of them were completely fine with this wedding. Fleur had a family full of average ponies that were happy that their cousin found a keeper. Every pony here was just here for these two, they were all talking to each other in excitement for how this would all go down.
Soon the ceremony was started, Octavia started to play the wedding march with the rest of her quartet. The bride marched down the aisle with a veil covering her face and it appeared that Tress was keeping her face hidden; Fancy was waiting at the end of the isle at the altar with his best stallion. This outdoor wedding was looking good so far.
“Rainbow, be ready. I see him.” Twilight knew that a dark cloud was not something you’d see in a clear sky.
“Huh where is he? Yeah I think I see it, give me a signal and I’ll circle around to take him down.” Rainbow noticed Twilight discreetly pointing above them to the dark cloud.
The priest started his spiel about why they all had gathered there today, the usual things one would expect at a slightly fancy wedding where there was a reception waiting for the two special ponies of the day to enjoy.
“Can any pony think of a reason these two ponies should not be wed? If not, then hold your voices and let these two ponies speak their vows.” This is when the villain always made an entrance or some pony that was more truly in love or some such shtick like that. The priest was told ahead of time about the problems that may occur during the wedding and he was bravely waiting for it to happen and it did in a spectacular manner.
“Yeah, I got something to say. If I can’t have her no one can!” A blonde haired pegasus stallion with a dark teal coat immediately kicked the dark cloud and bright bolt of lightning struck the pony in the brides dress with perfect accuracy.
There was a dark spot marring the wedding dress and the pony was lying on her side.
“No, Fleur my love! Shock Hazard you cad! How dare you interrupt our wedding?” Fancy was angry however the bride slowly stood up and stumbled towards Fancy Pants.
“I dare because… how is she still capable of standing? No matter I still have enough for one more bolt.” The now named Shock Hazard bucked a second lightning bolt and it struck the pony again in the heart, this time the bride didn’t fall over. “What in the world is going on? You should be dead!”
After a moment a dark chuckle erupted from the bride, it turned into a dark demented laugh.
“Hey Rainbow, send him here!” Tress reached up and pulled away the veil of the brides’ dress she was wearing and ripped off the fake metal unicorn horn she had on her head. The lightning had felt really good and only the force of it hitting her had knocked her down and she was prepared for the second one. That really charged her up to halfway and she was feeling positively alive, they had this all planned out.
The stallion looked confused and turned around to get blown off the cloud by a solid blue hoof ramming straight into his face sending him toppling off what was left of the cloud and rolling along the floor. He came to a stop in front of Tress who marched down the stairs from the altar and reared back and stomped down on Shock Hazards head knocking him clean out.
“Okay, that takes care of that…” Tress turned around then thought better of it and turned around to punch him one extra time to bloody his nose. “Everything clear Rainbow?”
“Yeah, no sign of demons, giant banana’s or even a single minotaur in sight. You’re good to go Fleur!” Rainbow flew down to go struggle back into her dress, who said weddings had to be boring as that was awesome.
“Okay, let’s continue this thing then! You were at your vows I believe?” Tress walked back into position and took the ring bearing pillow from the fake Tress.
“Oh thank goodness!” The fake Tress reached up and wiped off the pink makeup dust covering her white coat and removed her hood to reveal a fancily styled two tone pink colored braid and bun combo. It was Fleur, who walked up to stand next to Fancy. After a moment Twilight quickly trotted up and cast a bit of magic and Fleur’s horn appeared on her forehead where it rightfully belonged. “Sorry for scaring you like that my love, Tress was just being a good friend by taking my place temporarily and Twilight told me she has been trying to get into illusion magic recently. I vow to try and be by this stallion’s side in sickness or health for the rest of my life. Until we meet again in death, because screw loving any pony else if I die. I’m not letting any other pony have me in the afterlife.”
“Fleur my dear, I fear that you might soon have a penchant for giving me heart attacks. I too vow to try and be by her side to share my life with this wonderful mare in sickness or health for the rest of my life. I agree to the same thing if I die, you’re the only spirit I’m going to look at in that way and I bet you’ll always be as beautiful as you are now.” One could almost feel the hearts flowing off of Fancy and Fleur, as the stallion waggled his brow at his beloved.
“Do you take this stallion and do you take this mare in holy matrimony?” The priest continued without pause.
“You better believe I will after that.” Fleur stated clearly and concisely.
“I’m not here for any pony else but this really beautiful enchanting lady.” Fancy said smarmily.
“By the powers invested in me, you may now ring your mate and kiss each other as husband and wife.” The priest chuckled despite himself; the stallion trying to ruin a perfectly happy couple certainly deserved that bloody nose.
Fleur levitated a ring onto Fancy’s horn and he did the same for her, taking each other’s hooves they closed the gap and kissed. The crowd of ponies cheered throwing confetti into the air, within a few seconds Fleur deepened the kiss and had Fancy on his back in seconds.
“Hey, you two get a room! Or else you’re going to scar us young ones for life!” Barb got a good chuckle from the audience as the pair stood up blushing vibrantly.
“She’s right my dear, it’s time we all adjourned to the reception hall for food and drink!” Fancy smiled and started trotting back down the aisle with Fleur holding his hoof.
Eventually some Celestial guards arrived and took Shock Hazard into custody. The reception went quite well with Vinyl keeping the musical beats pretty loud. Twilight might have been a little high strung the entire time waiting for something worse to happen, but nothing ever came and she eventually relaxed once Fluttershy got a hold of her.
“There there, nothing bad is going to happen to us Twilight. How about some punch? You haven’t even had a slice of cake yet either.” Fluttershy noticed a lot of mares gathering around Fleur and she was holding a bouquet, maybe someday she’d be able to throw one of her own at a bunch of crazy single mares or stallions.
“Yeah, stop being uptight Radiance. Only one of the things on your list truly happened and you should be glad that’s all that did.” Tress and Fluttershy started dragging Twilight off for some refreshments. Tress stopped a moment to look back while giggling at the mares fighting over the bouquet Fleur just threw over her shoulder idly without a single care in the world. Fleur was last seen leading Fancy away from the reception hall.
In all things had gone pretty well, Twilight didn’t know where her calculations could have went wrong until she and all her friends were making their way home. Twilight turned a corner on the way to her parents’ house and just froze at what she was seeing, her ears dropped.
“Sparky why’d you…whoa.” At this moment Vinyl couldn’t do anything to stop her jaw from dropping.
“Okay what’s going… on? Wow.” Octavia just stood there with them staring and then Fluttershy and Tress turn the corner to see what was so incredible.
“You have got to be bucking kidding me.” Even Tress tried to make sense of what she was seeing.
“Tress I would kindly ask you to watch your language please as there is a minor around, even if it is a bit strange.” Fluttershy knew saying this was strange was an understatement of the century.
“Mom, am I seeing things or…” Barb started off.
The Cerberus quickly caught the last minor demon in its mouth and charged out of the city and leapt off the side of Canterlot. There was a giant fifty foot empty banana peel covering the streets with the words ‘Celestia was here’ written on it. There was a bunch of battered and bloodied minotaurs littering the streets around the banana peel and a gaggle of celestial guards were currently detaining some badly injured large cats and the ahuizotl from earlier. One pony in particular was covered in blood and looked horribly battered, bruised and wounded on the ground breathing heavily.
“We need a medic over here! With all that you have done today Shining Armor Sparkle, I’ll make sure you get a promotion even if I have to yell Celestia into the ground!” One of the guards proudly said to a pony very familiar to Twilight.
Fluttershy immediately went over to the guards trying to detain the cats to assist them; Tress sighed and followed to make sure none of them hurt her shy friend. Vinyl, Rainbow, Barb and Octavia just stood by Twilight.
“Sparky, let me be clear with you on this. Why in the hay didn’t you write down that all of your friends suddenly receive a thousand bits? Without anything bad happening to us when did get said bits.” Throwing her hooves up in the air Vinyl thought she could abuse her friends on paper prophetic powers.
“Well obviously Twilight’s a pessimist Vinyl, she doesn’t think of all the good things that can happen in life considering all the random stuff she has to deal with on a daily basis.” Octavia’s comment got to Twilight’s brain.
“Oh darn, of course I forgot something in my calculations! Only my family, ugh and all that worrying over nothing! Come on; let’s go check on my big brother and see how he’s doing.” Twilight face hoofed for forgetting to account for her family. At least her worries were completely put to rest, even if all the things she wrote on the list actually happened to her brother Shiny. They most likely hadn’t heard the ruckus because of Vinyl’s relatively loud music. Even now she still had to have a good long chat with Princess Cadence before she left Canterlot and she didn't know how to contact her.
Shining Armor Sparkle has just had a really, REALLY, really bad day.
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yea all in all that went pretty well.
I should have expected...
I don't even... 
gotcha...
Giant Banana Cake
Ishoulda... ipro...i have no words for how
this is! It bucked up my vocaburlary! And it is the first of cojntless other times. Now than, gotta rebuild my vocab from day 1 back to baby books away!
Was not exactly expecting that, well good job and keep up the work.
4141559
Octavia even foreshadowed the event by saying that not everything revolved around Twilight and Tress.
...*and then we all got one thousand bits*.
~Later~
Stupid mosquitoes. Stupid irony.
Wha?...
when did flutters gain THIS super power?