• Member Since 4th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen Nov 14th, 2019

thatguyfromkfc


I'm British, I write sad-fics, play Minecraft and watch ponies.

E

A normal brony is in for a big surprise. In the form of a small group of ponies. Will he be able to cope or will he be driven insane?

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 36 )

This has promise. I'll give you a 4 for now.

173973
was it ever really there?

Why can't this be longer!

Eh.... Clean it up and make it longer and you'll have 5 stars from me. I love where this is going, and I can already see the plot beginning to melt in, but boy, you need to step up your game. =] In a good way of course.:derpytongue2:

173973 i think teh 4th wall was shattered and it will never exist again cuz its in a unrepairable state and all the workers did die soooooo no more 4th wall:applecry:

This has a lot of promise, you deserve my track and stars.

Yes, yes, quite right. Clean it up a little, make it longer, add a little more detail, and I'll rate a few chapters later.

Seems good for an intro. And the others are right this does have a lot of promise. Tracking.

173973 Celestia took the fourth wall, smashed it and sent the bits to the moon, banished the 4th wall workers to the moon and as well, and threatened anyone that would rebuild it with moon banishment. :trollestia:

Pretty good, just make yo chapters longer bruh.:moustache:

I'll give you 4 stars for now...:pinkiehappy:

end there

Ohhohoh jake, you make it sound like it's going to be hard!

174587

Then she called Pinkie Pie to continue to violate the imaginary fourth wall and prevent any possibly rebuilding.
:pinkiehappy:



Story has loads of promise, I want more.
Can you please include more bronies in this? I like to think that if Equestria was real, and we got visited by ponies, the hardcore bronies would be all like "YEAH!" and foam at the mouth, dying of some sort of cuteness overload within a few hours.
Then the less-rabid members of the community would mount a raid on the Pentagon and acquire the technology required by the ponies to build a portal to Equestra (All the Cupcake fans dying in the process, horribly.) and then we shall bring forth a new age of tolerance love, magic, and adorability!
:yay:
Then again, it's just as likely the US government will go "Magic? ZOMG" and try to harness Twilight and Rarity, using them to fuel cell phones and television instead of coal power.
That would suck. :fluttercry:


Uhm.. so yeah. More bronies if you please, we need to represent every facet of the brony community in this story. I demand it :pinkiecrazy:

Except Cupcake fans. They can all get sent to.. uhm.. a rock farm! Yeah! Straighten their hair, send them to a rock farm, and LAUGH at their misery! Cheesbakes!

You're obviously looking for a slice-of-life feel, but I can't get it from how brief the chapters are in this style. If there were more subtle jokes a short format would be more acceptable (think the Azumanga Daioh manga), but if you continue with just the drama and laughs of life, I think longer chapters with more intense detail are in order.

Can you make the chapters just a bit longer?

Agai and Frizzy are right, it needs to be a little longer. Enjoyed reading though. :twilightsmile:

Tip: Pinkie MIGHT be more willing to let you take down the decorations if you allow her to use said decorations to throw a party FIRST. She may even help you clean up after the party.

Some tips:
-should be longer chapters
-needs maybe more speech lines
-at some point a montage of you getting these six mares under control
-maybe some akward moments (it's always fun)
-and ~yay~ :yay:

... You know it is a wonder nobody is complaining about the LOUD BOOMING EXPLOSIONS....
Might want to fix that.

So far, story is good. Can't wait to see the surprise.

My face after hearing ponies recseach human all the time :twilightoops:

I found this story very interesting, got all the characters correct in attitudes. Hopefully there will be a sequel or epilogue :twilightsmile:

Too fast, not enough detail or emotion.
:ajsleepy:

Uhh, I don't think that it would be that easy to kill Pinkie Pie, or any pony for that matter. If Rainbow Dash can slam into a barn face-first at the speed of sound, I think Pinkie could take a knife to the face. Not to mention, even Twilight could take an anvil and a piano dropped on her head.
Also, I think the story went along too fast, and was overall lackluster. Still, it killed a good bit of my time.

Can't wait for the sequel :twilightsmile:

Pleasepleaseplease do a sequel.
The story was great, but when pinkie died i went:pinkiegasp:--->:raritydespair:

My expressions to ponies researching humans all the time: :pinkiegasp::twilightoops:

My reactions to the fact Pinkie had to go to the hospitle: :pinkiegasp::pinkiesad2::fluttercry::applecry:

Nice story. :twilightsmile:
Grammar could use some work, but who am I to criticize?

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