Moving On

by Kaii-Leiko

Flashback Special: Halloween

Author's Note:

So this is crazy. It's been years. And I know this short, little flashback chapter isn't what you all want. But this seemed like the best way to throw myself back in here. I truly hope you all like it. I've been out of the fandom for a long time, life takes interesting turns. I still care about this show and this fandom, I just haven't had time to deal with any of this.

I want to finish this. I will, one day, I promise. But I don't even remember what happened in my story, not in great detail. I don't remember what I had planned, I barely remember the characters from the show. I haven't even finished the show!

Thank you though, to everyone. To all my supporters. You all push me to do this, you all make it all worthwhile. I love you all and I'll never be able to thank you enough for the support. That's why I'll try to get this done. I'm going to start planning and I'm going to try a couple of other things too. New stories, rewriting old ones... I want to do this right, so I need a little more patience.

For now, do me a favor and comment below. Tell me what you think of this little flashback, tell me how you've all been, tell me what I've missed!

Thank you everyo- everypony. Ha it's been a while. Thank you everyone. I look forward to getting back to all this.

PS. Follow me for some upcoming blog posts. I want to try and find some ways to connect with you all, so stay tuned for that.

Twilight's diagnosis was still rather early on when Nightmare Night came around. After all, it had only been a matter of months since she'd been told she had a year to live. Even less time had gone by since she'd gotten together with Fluttershy. It had been a crazy ride since then, everything was happening so quickly. It had taken so long for Twilight to get used to not using her magic. She went from using it every day to almost never. Sometimes she would try, just small spells. Every time she did she would get chastised since somepony almost always caught her. It was becoming something of a problem, somepony was always hovering over her.

Those first few weeks had been the worst. Her parents had stayed for a bit, Shining Armor and Cadence too. That had been a lot. Each time Twilight would walk into a room her family would put on a brave face. They'd pretend everything was fine, they'd pretend that everything was normal. Sometimes, when Twilight was at her lowest, she felt like she couldn't talk about it. Seeing them doing their best to stay strong forced her to remain indifferent about the whole thing too. Her friends weren't much better in that regard. They were walking on eggshells around her, with Rarity not even using her magic when the intellectual would arrive.

As one can imagine, starting a relationship during all this was nothing short of hectic. Getting time alone with Fluttershy was nigh impossible. Somepony was always interrupting, somepony always felt the need to stay around Twilight. No matter how many hints she threw out they just wouldn't... get it. Fluttershy was the one picking up on it the most, but couldn't overcome her shyness enough to tell people to get lost. This resulted in not very many dates, not much romance, and not much exploring of their relationship. That was the most difficult part. Fluttershy was, in a sense, the only source of light in this dark time. The only thing that brought peace to Twilight's aching heart.

Now with Nightmare Night coming up... There was more to do than ever. Twilight's family was gone (for now) but she felt like she was getting bombarded with everything. It wasn't like she wasn't looking forward to nightmare night, no, she was rather excited. It just would have been nice to relax every once in a while. The side effects of her blunder hadn't really started destroying her but there was a sense of weariness. She was getting tired, day by day she could feel herself growing more fatigued. Sometimes she wanted to lay in bed for hours upon hours. She wanted to curl up. She wanted to give up. She never did though. Not once...

Not yet... the moment the thought entered Twilight's head she regretted it. It was too early to start being defeated. She spent much of her time wondering how many of her thoughts were hers and how many were implanted from the darkness growing within her. How much was it affecting her? Physically? Emotionally? Even her irritation with her friends and family was that her? or her? Was there even a way to know? It was maddening, sending her into a spiral she couldn't escape. Negativity bred negativity, if she didn't get it under control Twilight worried she'd be consumed that much sooner.

Their main project had been preparing Ponyville for the younglings, the fillies who would be going out to get candy. A haunted house was being set up and even Princess Luna intended on making an appearance. The entire town was turned into a veritable town of nightmares. The weather ponies had even managed to get permission to roll some extra fog in. It was spooky, even for the older ponies. Twilight had been looking forward to handing out candy but then a thought struck her, making her rethink her plans.

This was going to be her last Nightmare Night ever. Ever. There would never be another one, not for her. This had initially sent her spiraling into a panic, then she'd cried, then she'd grown angry and lashed out. All the usual steps that came with such realizations and when she'd calmed down she'd concluded there was only one thing she really wanted to do. Spend the night with her friends. Lucky for her they weren't likely to deny the dying girl. Everypony had agreed and it would be the first time since the devastating news that they would all be together. Twilight hoped beyond hope it could be a fun night. Her final Nightmare Night. Just because things sucked, didn't mean she couldn't enjoy Nightmare Night.

The library was ready. The decorating was light, the focus for decorations had been mostly for the town. A few pumpkins were put up for ambiance, and the decor had shifted to a more orange tone than usual. She'd done it with magic, earning her a scolding from Spike. Using her magic, as much as it pained her and sped along her demise, was occasionally the only source of respite she could find. It quieted her mind. It had been a simple spell but had left her on the ground for several minutes, which is when Spike had found her. At least the library looked good, but Twilight had been wondering since then if the laughter she'd heard in the recesses of her mind was real or just her mind playing tricks on her.

She and Spike had laid out snacks, candy, soda. They had set up all the sleeping bags and Twilight hadn't prepared an itinerary this time. Not this time, this time she was just going to... wing it. That in itself was an exciting idea. Her and her friends, just seeing where the night would take them. The bookworm, ditching her lists and planning and going all out. It could turn into an absolutely crazy night!

As her friends arrived one-by-one, each in a costume of their own Twilight's heart only grew with happiness. She hated the thought of this year being the last of, well, anything. But maybe that meant they could make tons of special memories. Rarity and Applejack had shown up, dressed as one another. This had brought a chuckle out of Twilight, one of the first real laughs she'd mustered since the news. Both were clearly overjoyed at having brought some mirth to Twilight during these trying times. Rainbow Dash had arrived, as expected, dressed up as one of the Wondercolts. Pinkie came dressed as a cupcake. It was Fluttershy that made Twilight stop in her tracks though.

Fluttershy had somehow found a way to be even more endearing than her already cute self managed to be every single day. She'd arrived dressed up as a bunny, one that suspiciously resembled Angel bunny. The poor, yellow mare saw the look on Twilight's face and faltered, hesitating before entering the library. Their eyes locked for several long seconds, before both looked away. Fluttershy was the first to speak.

"Um, is there something wrong with my costume...?"

"No!" Twilight replied quickly, too quickly. She raised a hoof to cover her mouth and cleared her throat before continuing. "I just... was surprised,"

"Oh. Why?" Fluttershy's head tilted, melting Twilight's heart.

"You just looked so adorable. It made me... slow."

Fluttershy's butter cheeks flushed, and she kicked lightly at the ground. "Oh, gosh. Your mind is a lot of things Twilight Sparkle, but I don't think slow is one of them."

That brought Twilight to a smile, and she stepped forward. She brought her head into Fluttershy's neck and they spent a solid minute nuzzling softly. Were they cats they'd both be purring contentedly. Alas, they were ponies. And their friends were around. One of their friends cleared their throats, knocking both girls out of their tender bubble. They jumped, both turning towards the others and coughing shyly. This was just further proof that they needed more time alone, though.

The night went on just as Twilight had hoped for. They'd watched spooky movies, giving the two lovers a chance to cuddle. They'd swapped scary stories, gossiped, and just generally caught up. For a few hours, Twilight wasn't sick, for a few hours she was just a mare with her friends enjoying Nightmare Night. There was laughter and fun, and even time for a little romance, small pecks traded when nopony was looking.

As the ponies grew more tired, eyes growing weary but nopony willing to go to bed yet, they laid together in a circle. Spike had fallen asleep hours ago and the sun would be peeking out above the horizon before long. Somepony suggested trading what scared the other most, revealing their greatest fear. It had seemed an innocent enough idea, some silly bonding between best friends. Once everypony had a turn, save Fluttershy and Twilight, that was when things got awkward. For starters neither could decide who would go first.

Fluttershy was terrified from being put on the spot, desperation peeking through that usually shy demeanor. She kept glancing towards Twilight, revealing that surely, that was a part of her fears. Something to do with Twilight's death. Was she terrified of finding love only to lose it so soon?

Twilight decided to step in, so to speak, and cleared her throat to shift the attention towards her. Under the blanket she had a hoof overtop Fluttershy's though, just rubbing soft, reassuring circles. "I'm afraid of-" she paused. What was she most afraid of? She'd been afraid of many things in her life but they all seemed trivial now. "I'm afraid of what happens to you all when I'm gone." Twilight's voice faltered, choking up. "I'm afraid to think of how many Nightmare Night's I'm going to miss with you girls. I'm afraid of how much I'm going to hurt you by leaving," leaving was easier to say than dying. "I'm afraid of hurting you, I'm afraid of being alone but I'm afraid of being with you..." Twilight was growing almost manic, as the tears overflowed and hit the ground silently, staining the wood of the library floor. She placed her head to the floor, refusing to look towards her friends anymore. Then she said the most obvious thing, something everypony knew. Something they all knew but had been avoiding. "I'm afraid to die..."

Nopony said anything for the remainder of the night. They'd all huddled together around Twilight and comforted her until she'd stopped crying until she'd fallen asleep. Then they too fell asleep. They knew they'd have to do something, but that was a problem they'd need to deal with in the morning when all their fears had been safely tucked away.

Comments

[TheMTVGAMEONE1]

Nice chapter and a pretty solid start although I think it would have been better in DiD since you've already started bonus chapters there.

Also, I think I found an error

" You just looked so adorable. It made me... slow. "

I think this has the wrong color. Twilight says it if I'm correct

[GjallarFox]

It is most excellent to see both you and this story alive once more. This is most certainly worth the wait, and I will gladly await further updates.

~GjallarFox

[Ryoki The Kirin]

I just bindge read these two stories and now I can't get enough FlutterLight! Hope you keep up the good work! Can't wait to see what Fluttershy is going to do next chapter!

[GuestD579]

I just reread both stories, and I remembered why I love them so much. The ending of the first has me in tears. Even if you don't have time to write this story that okay, you have a talent. It's hard for many authors to get that genuine emotion to come across, let alone do it justice. I hope you still write at the very least, no matter what it is. I'd still read it.

[Sucy Manbavaran]

Just found this story series and i am pleasantly surprised to see you plan on picking it up again!

i hope to see an update soon! but its fine if ya don't cause you've already given me such a wonderful story to read!