A Research Journal of a Madpony.
An excerpt from Foxe Yi Kimchi's research journal.
I have worked long and tedious hours try to study Alicorn biology from afar. Sadly, I am nothing more than a meager microbiologist, unworthy to meet the Princesses of Equestria. However, that does not mean I will give up on my life's work! I have scoured countless tomes from just as many libraries to try and catch a glimpse of the Princesses' daily life. I have asked just as many palace staff about our beloved Princesses, trying to find every rumor I could get my hooves on. As we know, our Princesses are immune to virtually all diseases. Heavens be praised! But I may have found a disease that actually infects the Princesses of Equestria.
There are stories that over a thousand years ago our Princess of the Moon, Luna, contracted this rare disease. I have read that first symptoms are very similar to that of the common flu. However, as quickly as the symptoms appeared, Princess of the Sun, Celestia, had to take drastic actions. I heard that Princess Celestia had to quarantine her sister in her room until the illness passed. It must have only gone worse from there, because I have read stories that cries of anguish could be heard from her chambers. Princess Celestia assured everypony that everything was alright. But still, it must have been a horrific illness due to the fact that when Princess Luna was asked about it, she adamantly refused to talk about it. Some say her face turned green when thinking about it.
In addition, the last piece of information I was able to obtain is that in recent centuries, Princess Celestia was known to get a shot in a routinely, centennial, fashion. However that shot is kept a secret, as the physicians who administered it will not reveal any information. Could it possibly be a vaccine like the flu vaccine? Surely it could not be something as simply as that. This is a pathogen that can infect the most powerful beings on Earth! I have attached above a diagram of what I think the pathogen must look like. Since it infects only Alicorn princesses, it too must share common properties with said Alicorn Princesses.
Oh how I would love nothing more to study this disease! If only I could get my hooves on a culture of this pathogen! Think of the SCIENCE that I could do! But I must work fast. I cannot let somepony beat me in this discovery. I CANNOT LET TWILIGHT SPARKLE BEAT ME IN THIS DISCOVERY! IT IS NOT FAIR! HOW COME SHE GETS TO FIND ALL THE SCIENTIFIC DISCOVERIES? I mean yeah she is Princess Celestia's personal protegee a saved Equestria numerous times... BUT IT IS NOT FAIR! CAN'T SHE THROW JUST A FEW SCRAPS FOR US LOWLY PONIES? JUST ENOUGH SO LONELY SCIENTIST LIKE ME HAVE A CHANCE AT A SCIENTIFIC BREAKTHROUGH! JUST ONE IS ALL I ASK FOR! WITH A SCIENTIFIC DISCOVERY UNDER MY BELT I CAN FINALLY GET A MAREFRIEND! WHY DOES TWILIGHT SPARKLE GET TO HOG ALL THE SCIENTIFIC DISCOVERIES? WAAaa-
The rest of the segment is unlegible due to numerous water like stains found on the bottom of the page, which in turn has caused the ink to run off. Chemical analysis of this water like substance revealed that it was in fact, tears of unfathomable sadness. In addition, rumors say that Foxe Yi Kimchi was found passed out with many empty bottles of beer around him during this time.
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I was originally planning on adding these pictures to chapters one and two. But things got in the way, so they were delayed. So I decided to add these pictures in their own separate chapter.
As mentioned above, chapter 1 and 2 have been cleaned up somewhat, and are still in the process. The site says they have not been modfied, but they have. It is a bug on the site.
Lastly, boy does this Foxe Yi Kimchi sound like a loser, am I right?
*drinks*
Edit: Sorry for removal of chapter, had to fix a mistake I found.
Edit 2: Pictures have been moved to appropriate chapters.
I found wat I was looking for
derpicdn.net/media/W1siZiIsIjIwMTIvMTIvMTQvMjBfNTBfMTRfMTNfMTgwNjc5X19VTk9QVF9fc2FmZV9hbmltYXRlZF9iaWdfbWFjaW50b3NoX2dpZl9zaGl0c3Rvcm1fYnJhY2VfeW91cnNlbHZlc19icmFjZV93aW50ZXJfaXNfY29taW5nIl1d/180679__safe_animated_big-macintosh_shitstorm_brace-yourselves_brace_winter-is-coming.gif
Nice one foxy. :P
It's looks really cool with all the pictures added.
*Helix, the mad scientist pony, sympathizes with Foxe Yi Kimchi's rage* Stupid smart Twilight making all the discoveries just because she has unlimited access to the Royal Treasury... Maybe we can join forces and get rid of the Princesses once and for all!
Then WE shall rule Equestria! BWAH HA HA... Wait... why should I share the glory! Yes, I'll pretend to be on his side and then betray him once the Princesses are destroyed! BWAH HA HA HA!!!
2319511
Yeah, total loser. He probably couldn't write one thousand words to save his life.
I liked the picture of the disease, though. Funny.
Ooh, pictures!
I hate that you did a recap, but since you added a note about the illness they have this adds another plot for the story.
2319657 A masterful plan. Just like all the others the rest of the herd (except myself) are hatching or brewing.
Me? Oh, hay no, I'll just wait for the dust to settle and re-build Equestria, then run away, because those idiot ponies will ask me to rule over them.
GROW A BACKBONE, WILL YOU!??!
This was too good not to laugh at. Especially after reading a Pinkie Pie narration elsewhere.
Although I did have an odd turn, 'cause I thought the germ was looking at me. No. No. Do not want.
Damn these Princesses, they drive me to drink.
2320665 Alondro's master plan:
Phase 1: EXTERMINATE the Princesses with Daleks (or something)
Phase 2: Stab Foxy in the back! (Et tu, Alondro? X___x )
Phase 3: Profit! ... Er, ruling da vurld!
It's fool-proof!
Pictures! Yay!
2321004 I'd rather have a free bottle a-front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy.
Insanity MUST insue.
) tries to get a sample but fails hilariously each time 
That or a scene where foxe (author self insert?
2321528
How could this Foxe Yi Kimchi be?
The world may never know...
A one a two! A three!
CRUNCH
...
The secrets if the universe have now been told to me
Great idea with the pictures, it's always nice to have something to visualise the story.
And aalicorn pathogen is the best pony
i1.ytimg.com/vi/48H34ukFe8g/hqdefault.jpg
So delicious
2324857
Wat.
Alicorn pathogen is best pathogen.
As for your various "scientific" plans for world domination:
Are you thinking what I'm thinking, Pinkie?
2327151
Woo woo woo, who said anything about domination? I dont know if you know this or not, but I am Foxy Kimchi, not Foxe Yi Kimchi.
Foxe Yi Kimchi just wants to get his name out there.
2327177 I was referring to 2321039 and 2319657 mostly.
This Foxe Yi Kimchi character doesn't sound like a threat to anypony.
But in a world where Twilight Sparkle, you all lose.
2327258
Indeed, we are nothing compared to her...nothing...
Dont see the point of putting a chapter up when its simply the past 2 recapped with a bit of science added too it. Got my hopes up of another luna-tortures-Tia chapter...
2327495
Those pictures were orginally meant for first two chapters, but delayed. So i wanted everyone to see them
2327258 But now that Twilight Sparkle has become an alicorn, she has become an invalidated god-mode character, and thus is vulnerable to destruction by PLOT CONTRIVANCE!!
MUWAH HA HA HA!!
2319511
Oh... I just got that...
This story is hilarious!
Good job, good job indeed.
Small typo
I almost feel sorry for poor Foxe Yi Kimchi.
That picture of the alicorn disease is awesome
2341483 Fewer girls in England, or Equestria?
Heehee. Liked the pictures.
Cleaned up indeed. Now I just need...more material...
The pictures killed my headcanon
2347488
Working on it, resubmitted. Next chapter 3.
2347525
How?
2347589 Woohoo!
2347589 "They weren't what I pictured in my head when I read the story" he said, trying his best not to sound like a whiny Rarity.
I like them regardless though. I guess I should of mentioned that before.
Don't worry, my head canon regenerates
2351678
Dont worry, this doesnt follow my head cannon either. Just consider it some alternate universe or something.
2359508
First and foremost, I am sorry about the pictures. I do not know what is wrong at the moment as I can see it quite fine. Send me a PM if you want me to send you the actual link to them.
All right, I will give my thoughts on this. First and foremost, this is not a Twiliestia shipping, there will be no shipping between Celestia and anyone really. I put it in for a joke for two reasons, one I like Twiliestia (because it is bestia), second is was supposed to be blunt force object for Luna to use. Now for the actual shipping part.
Based on what you said, Celestia is not allowed to like anyone except for Discord and Luna. Now Luna it would be creepy as fuck because she is her sister. Discord, that is a different story. Depending if you want to take other fanon out there, and if you believe opposites attract or not in this case.
It seems very unfair for Celestia, who because of her age (yet she does not look like it) to having any close relationship with anyone. Let us take for example the Twilight crush on Celestia as seen in most shipping. Twilight confesses her love, and Celestia also confesses her feelings. Is this any different, Celestia having feelings for her? It seems completely reasonable that Celestia took Twilight as a student to mentor her and be her teacher. Over time, as Twilight becomes an adult, Celestia could become closer to her because outside of Luna, Twilight is the only one Celestia had a personal relationship. It seems fair and reasonable that Celestia feelings developed over time. In addition, it is not like Celestia is lusting over her or anything.
So, in this part Twiliestia serves two part. One to amuse me, second it is a tool for which Luna can use to mess with her sister. It was supposed to be blunt as a 2x4. Something to get Celestia off her guard. Celestia thought she had a secret, but in reality everyone knows Twilight has a crush on Celestia, and Celestia on Twilight.
If you worried about actual shipping, there is none really. I used it as a gag, and it served its purpose. I may not include any more references depending on what I feel at the moment.
Foxy Kimchi
2359893 Well, if the crush is on both sides, but you want to avoid a romantic relationship, it would seem like you need to insert an Immortality Cock-Block. Namely, I'm immortal, you're not. Twilight realizes how much pain Celestia would go through after Twi's death (unless this goes on to Season 3. Then go ahead and fire the shipping cannon, because Twi's immortal too!) and the last thing Twilight would want to do is cause more distress to her mentor.
2344181 in Equestria. Given the lack of clothing, everyponie's doing that already.
2363059 There's probably some social thing against showing the area between one's backlegs to a stallion or mare.
2363048
Well here is how I see it. Celestia may not want to express her feelings because she knows Twilight. She can stress herself crazy, and Celestia knows that Twilight will do whatever she says. So she dosnt want to express it because she is afraid she will put Twilight in an stressful situation. That and maybe Celestia already knows Twilight will become a Princess
Twilight may be afraid to express it because she think she will be sent to prison in the place she will be banished too.
Point is, I just wanted to hint at it so Luna can mess with Celestia. There are already Twiliestia fics out there that work this problem out (see Composure), so there is no need for me to do it.
Why did the site not tell me this had updated? That's two different story updates I missed due to the site just not putting them in with the favorites that had an unread chapter. Oh well, I just have to go through all 300+ stories I'm tracking EVERY WEEK OR TWO to make sure I don't miss anything.
Also, as a biology major who has had to deal with microbiology entirely too much, I can safely say that if I saw a cell that looked like that, I would have to ask if someone had spiked my drink. Then I would be terrified, regardless of the response I was given. 'Tis the king of all Bacteria! Flee for your lives!
2375858
A bug that could make the princesses sick? Dam it would have to be one scary looking one.
:D
2321039 What do you do when the Dalek's decide to continue their extermination and destroy all the subjects you were hoping to get a profit from?
2399968 The Daleks will need more of those Dalek bump things! (has a monopoly on the supply)
2407973 Ah, supply and demand, gotta love it, gotta hate it.
Now that was funny. Okay I'm hooked. You got a new fan right here
It's protégé.
Also -
