• Member Since 28th Oct, 2011
  • offline last seen 10 hours ago

chief maximus


Why do I write? Because I can't draw! I write mainly as an outlet, and don't take it too seriously. If you like what I write, awesome! If not, that's cool too.

T

It's been said in prophecies that nopony will know the time or date the magic of Equestria that empowers its citizens would leave. I thought it was just superstitious nonsense written by ancient witch doctors. In a sense, they were right. But I would have never expected it to come like this. —Princess Twilight Sparkle, 05/05/1268

AU tag added due to the Cutie Mark Crusaders getting Cutie Marked.

Chapters (13)
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Comments ( 396 )

um, wow, fimfiction broke for me :|

Loving the atmosphere here, dude. Very chilling and... Off.

I take it this is going to be some epic length affair? Also, glad you're back!


Now, where is MacinDash part three?!

3233626 Mac and Dash is coming. It's all already planned out, all I have to do is make it into words.

I have enjoyed it thusfar, although the idea of an equestria where the equines lose their minds is kind of chilling.

Well, this is beautiful. You really are good at setting up whatever atmosphere you choose.

congrats on the Feature.

thumbs down.

This is a fantastic piece of quiet horror. Mental and magical death... ugh. Terrifying. Winter leads in to spring, but that may be overextending the metaphor...

In any case, looking forward to more. Especially whatever happened to Discord.

Looking forward to more! :pinkiehappy:

"Wanderings of a Non-Brony" ended and one day later this gem hops in the feature box... I ain't even mad. :twilightsmile:

Dude, that's creepy.

I could not stop reading this. This story truly deserves to be popular.
The idea of slowly losing one's sentience, one's mind, is chilling. The fact that the ponies that were affected slowly didn't even notice it makes it way more terrifying.

I fear it won't end happily...

Still, continue this. I can't wait for more.

Okay, wow. This? This is good. The premise is unique, the pacing is excellent, the characterization is good, and my feels are already bruised from you hitting them! :fluttercry: This is going in my favorites.

Whats this? Something unique on fimfic for a change! Looking forward to more, good sir! :pinkiehappy:

Wow, this is like "The Last of Us" with how bleak it is. Loving it by the way.

This is one of my favorite of your ideas so far, Bronius. Truly. It's fascinating.

Well that's pretty awful. Why did Celestia even bother if the whole thing was inevitable? I take it that the grass claimed Celestia some time ago?

The premise is interesting, although the justification seems a little thin on the ground. I hope there's more to build up to than a depressing winding down to the END OF EVERYTHING. Really, if it's a magic leaving the world issue, then it ought to start affecting the griffins too. I have to wonder if that "prairie lion" was really a lion and not a griffin...

If it's really just a spiral to a depressing end, you might want to scoot back to the beginning of the story and write it from there. Even if it does make more sense from this end of it, since the reader is just as much in the dark as the main characters (so far) are.

Comment posted by Zanthos deleted Sep 21st, 2013

Very intriguing. I'm looking forward to seeing how this pans out.

Do not disappoint me.

Soooo, none of the other clearly magical creatures have this limitation...

Wow... that's just... so thoroughly biased.

I could accept the entire world losing magic and everything reverting to an animalistic state, but ONLY ponies losing magic and their minds along with it? In a world with magic wolves made of sticks? With griffons that can walk on clouds? With love-eating bug ponies that can change shapes? With DISCORD?

That's just a low-blow against the ponies.

3234868 The way I'm reading it is that for some reason only the ponies are going to lose their magic and minds. And that they were once just animals and Celly and Luna gave up mortality to let them keep... wait... they GAVE UP mortality?

So, to keep these ponies from going back to the animals they were made from (for whatever reason that was done in the first place) Celestia and Luna had to lose their capacity to die! Oh what a sacrifice!

Dude, sign me the hell up for that! :trollestia:

3235472
Hmm... Yeah. That doesn't make a whole lot of sense, unless Griffins are somehow naturally sentient? I'm guessing by give up their "mortality" the authors means they agreed to eternal/long-term oversight that would be a burden to anypony. Unfortunately that doesn't make a whole lot of sense, especially considering how you pointed out that most ponies would go for that kind of exchange (at least initially). Besides, if even the Princesses succumbed to grazing, how can/why should they be immortal? What about Princess Cadence?

I'm also a bit confused how they had to convince this 'Epona' and why it would need to be done in the first place. It's implied that somehow ponies overstayed their time limit and Celestia/Luna had to somehow pay for more. If all the ponies are supposed to become extinct, why don't they just die when they lose magic? It's all very confusing.

Why on earth would Celestia not want Twilight to linger. If she's going to lose everything, why not enjoy it while it lasts. Why succumb to grazing on purpose and die a dumb pony? Is Celestia advocating suicide? I can't she why she would since it's obvious she, Celestia, didn't take that router out of this.

just waiting for some more.:twilightsmile:

3235564 maybe Celestia and Luna were caught off guard by the grazing, maybe there was some grass laced into their food when they weren't looking by a would be assassin who then later fell to the grazing as well and Rarity took Twilight's laced sandwich which is why she is in the cell instead of the lavender princess mare. just an Idea on how it could have happened.:twilightsmile:

3235564 I really have no idea why the ponies were given sapience to begin with if it was something so temporary.

It's completely illogical.

And if magic could accomplish that, wouldn't beings capable of that ALSO know how 'natural' sapience works and, maybe, magically alter their genomes such that intelligence becomes naturally hereditary? That's a much more sensible way of doing this. It's also much easier than creating fake personalities for every single pony in existence as it becomes self-perpetuating after a single generation.

Even magic must give way to reason. :twilightsmile:

I would be the best god. I think of everything. :trollestia:

The only thing I could make any sense is if this is meant to be metaphorical in some way, that the ponies were supposed to be Celestia and Luna's 'toys' and that they couldn't bear to let them go when they began to 'grow up', so they instead gave up mature divinity to continue playing the parts of pony princesses.

But in that case, Celestia and Luna should be the only alicorns. Neither Cadance nor Twilicorn make any sense with that backstory.

Discord also doesn't fit into the picture in either circumstance.

I like these guys!
And I like this story:pinkiehappy:

I wonder how long until the griffon kingdom moves in to take the vacant land?

3235453 Okay, I see your comments a lot, and while I usually don't agree with what you say, I with you on this one. Why are the ponies the only ones affected by this when you consider the fact that pretty much every being on the planet has magic. If it was the result of the grass having a bacteria or fungus that only effects ponies then I would be fine.

Fascinating so far, nice job Bronius.

I must have misunderstood who was in the barn back in chapter two, I would have sworn Dash was there. Or at least a mare with fading streaks of color in her mane.

He watched helplessly as his sword lay in the dust, getting further from him as the shack pulled him into its maw-like doorway.

He hooked his claws into the doorframe, stopping his momentum for a moment. He opened his mouth to scream, but no sound came. The half of his body in the darkness was cold. He remembered that distinctly. Eros fought to stay in the sunlight, but soon more cloth snakes took hold of his arms and pried his talons from their embedded position in the mortar. Once he was inside the shack, the door slammed shut, startling him awake while it was still dark out.

Well, I get reeeally confused by some of the narrative. I love the story and concept, though. But I at least need to re-read certain parts three or four times before I can catch on to what's happening. :derpyderp1:

I rather like the style and setting of this so far. Can't wait to see more! :pinkiesmile:

3235453 Pardon the trope-quoting, but perhaps Magic A is Magic A?
The premise of specific regression reminds me of Dies the Fire, but this one affects even their sentience. I would definitely keep an eye on this.

Here's my bit of speculation: Celestia told Twilight not to linger, because she is the Element of Magic, the literally embodiment of magic. As such it can't be taken from her. She maybe the only pony who is immune to the grazing. That said, it may also be that as an alicorn, she has the ability to move beyond the current world and go to wherever Celestia, Luna, and their mother are from.

But I've got to wonder what Discord is up to. I doubt he can undo the grazing himself, so maybe he's moving the sun and taking care of the weather for Equestria. I doubt he'd abandon Fluttershy and others since becoming their friend.

I eagerly await the next chapter.

Ooh, good dark fuel for my dark writings... I like it.

Oh! I do hope we get to see something like a flashback to watch the process more in-depth. Maybe a 'How it happened to Celestia' bit?

So the real question is whether the transformation into a grazer is due to a slow return to the instincts that were held at bay by inert magic or perhaps the grass has a memetic effect on ponies. Either way, things don't look like they are going to improve in the foreseeable future.

This is damn good, looking forward to reading more, and will be showing it to my friend.

Oh my god, the reason those ponies ran away... i just realized, faved,liked, very cool and original

How this story has 9 down-votes is beyond me, and whoever did is either a troll or an ignoramus who wouldn't know an epic if it kicked them by their shins :rainbowdetermined2:

3235472>>3235564>>3236027 >Implying it doesn't spread.

Tsk Tsk readers. You should know me better than that. :ajsmug:

Jesus Christ, how horrifying. Kept reminding me of the bit in Larklight when everyone just up and turns into trees over the course of a summer, their skin going all scratchy, digging their toes into the soil, stretching their arms...

Though it's kinda funny for magic to be a finite resource that just sort of drains away like bathwater once every X thousand years, and that that was the only thing stopping the ponies from going native this whole time. You'd have thought Celestia might've used her massive lifespan to figure out some way around it. Unless it was one of those things she just never got around to doing. Or they were just all "Welp, it's been a good run, time to go frolic in the fields".

Doubtless explanations will be provided, however aggravating the wait for them is.

Geez, I almost say this needs a tragedy tag, BM. That's a fate worse than death, man, being reverted to some primitive beast like that. Although, I DO have to ask, why just ponies? I mean, it would appear that Griffons need magic to fly, and a bunch of other species are sapient. Why aren't THEY being affected? And even then...

3233954
Mayhaps, a reason why? Although, I know you... kinda... so I think I can guess, and I THINK it's the same problem I now have: why would the god that created them... MAKE this happen? Like, okay, if it was some outside thing, and she does not interfere, that's fine. But if this is something she designed to happen... dafuq?

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Regression! I get it now.

Original! I'll fave this one and keep reading.

Based on a combination of the description, Dark tag, and a few comments that I read...

I'm too scared to read this.:fluttercry:

I'll put this down as "Read Later."

So... how likely is it that this'll have a not-so-unhappy ending? I know that might be 'spoilery-ish', but... well, call me a pansy if you want, but I don't like going into a dark tunnel without knowing there's a light at the end. I've read too many crapshoot-stories with tragic endings to just hop into this one and naively hope for the best. I don't handle unresolvable tragedy very well. :fluttercry:

The premise really does sound interesting. I'd love to read it if it's not going to just give me bad feels and then end.

3236031 Same here. Maybe there's another Pegasus with a similar mane?

Hold on a minute, a gem merchent called Argos
cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/250x250/38162824.jpg

Anyway another epic story.

I'm with those scratching my head over the justification. Why are only ponies affected? Why was the "price" Celestia and Luna's ability to die? You might have been better off making this a microbe or maybe even some supernatural cause. The ponies' supposed benevolent creator saying "You know how I made you sapient? I put a time limit on it because...quantum." just doesn't make any sense.

Outside of that, this is a brilliant story. It's chilling and the atmosphere is rich in every scene. Argos and Eros are very likeable characters and perfect avatars for the readers to experience what's happened through.

Hooo boy. This is creepy as it should be so far.

BR

I feel like this is a mix of The Last Of Us and Stephen King's Cell.
Anyway, wonderful story. Can't wait to read more.

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