"Apple fritters! Apple cider! Um, boy, they's good on a chilly night!"
Standing at her stall near Ponyville Town Hall, Granny Smith hugged her shawl around her and grinned at the happy theater crowd.
"Warm fritters... they's good eatin' in winter! An' hot cider... wull, it just ain't a good evenin' without hot cider! Come git some!"
"Mrs. Smith, I am appalled!" declared Rarity the unicorn, before Granny Smith's cart.
"Yer whut, now? An apple?" asked Granny Smith.
Rarity trotted around Granny Smith's cart, drew off her long, warm cape and tossed it over the older pony.
"There now," said Rarity, tugging the edges of her cloak around Granny Smith. "Isn't that better?"
"Aw, Ah wuz okay a'fore. Long as th' timberwolves ain't bitin', Ah gots no complaints," said Granny Smith, as she pulled the cloak more tightly around her. She squinted up at Rarity. "Say! Ain't you that fancy lady that's good friends with muh grandotter? Oh, she dotes on you! You should come up t' the house some time! We'd love t' entertain yuh! Winter's kind of a quiet time fer us.
"You might never guess it, but Big Macintosh sings. Thass right. Him an' Apple Bloom, they're quite a pair. Applejack is good on harpsichord an' banjo, but not like her Ma an' Pa, rest 'em. Ah do m'best t' keep up, but these tired ol' hooves, wull, they ain't too cooperative. Ah still miss muh Mister. Oh, he wuz a stallion t' consider! So big an' fine! Ah miss him 'specially, this time o' year.
"Whut can Ah get ya, dearie?" Granny Smith asked. "These are cellar apples, Ah'm afraid, since th' trees are a'sleepin'. Oh, but th' cider an' fritters are first rate!"
Rarity glanced down at her hooves, dressed in splendid shoes of silver, then looked at Granny Smith.
"Oh, Mrs. Smith, I am so glad that you are here!" Rarity said. "I have been so, so stupid. Oh, the shame! I have completely neglected the needs of the play's cast and crew! I forgot about catering! How ridiculous of me! Would you, I beg you, bring your cart inside the Hall? The children, the cast and crew, will be so thirsty and hungry during and after the show! Please, won't you come with me? I only have a little to offer."
Rarity levitated three gold solars from her purse and deposited them before Granny Smith.
Granny Smith's eyes lit up.
"And it would mean so much, to the company, to the children, if you would," pleaded Rarity.
"Wull, all right," said Granny Smith.
Rarity helped Granny Smith maneuver her little cart to the stage door. Once inside, the two of them set up a little concession area for the company. It only took a moment for members of the cast and crew to show up and help themselves.
"Thank you so much for your help, Mrs. Smith," said Rarity. "I can't imagine what I would have done without you."
"Wull, Ah wuz kinda hoping t' see th' show," said Granny Smith. "Both of muh grandotters are in it! Thass right! And Big Macintosh, wull, he's busy, movin' th' heavy sets around. Ah hope Ah can still find a seat!"
Rarity smiled. "I know of one empty seat. Come with me, dear! Let's see if you like it!"
And so Rarity the unicorn gently escorted Granny Smith to her proper place: a seat at the front of the Princess's Booth.
***
The night of the play, as the theater slowly filled with eager ponies, Octavia's quartet focused on soothing variations of Patchy Belle's Canon in D, warming up her strings for the musical challenges to come.
Despite the tranquil music, there was, understandably, some commotion when the Lord of Chaos entered the theater.
Discord, clad in a purple top hat and tails, waded through the crowd, grinning toothily. Fluttershy held his arm, trying to reassure everypony.
As the pair approached their seats in the front row, Director Dash flew out of the wings to confront them. "What are you up to, Discord?" challenged Rainbow Dash.
"Why, I'm only here to enjoy the play," said Discord. He consulted his program. "'Hot Swarming Evil.' It sounds delightful."
"The title is 'Hearth's Warming Eve,'" shouted Rainbow Dash.
Discord blinked. He looked down at his program and turned it right-side up. "Why, you are correct," he said, squinting at the program.
Discord turned to Fluttershy sadly. "Not even one little zombie?"
"No, I'm afraid not," said Fluttershy, placing one hoof upon his lion paw. "Maybe next time."
"You better not try anything," warned Rainbow Dash. "I've got my eye on you, Discord!"
Discord haughtily adjusted the monocle in his right eye. Then the second monocle in his left eye. He put on his pince-nez, to assist his third and fourth eyes. Then he settled his glasses over his fifth and sixth eyes.
"I don't know," Discord said. "Sometimes, I just want to make a spectacle of myself."
His head snapped back to its usual binocular form. He grinned wolfishly and winked at Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash nodded. "Remember I'm counting on your good behavior. You better watch him, Fluttershy," she said, then fled away backstage.
"Oh, my," said Fluttershy. "Don't worry, Discord. I think she's just a little nervous right now about her play. Oh, here are our seats! Right down front, like you wanted."
Discord and Fluttershy took their seats, front row center. Discord used the opportunity to stretch his legs. Stretching them until they rested on top of the stage.
"Ah! That's nice," he said, wiggling his odd number of toes. "You know, until you've been encased in stone for a thousand years, you don't really appreciate flexibility."
"Um, Discord?" said Fluttershy. "If you could shrink down just a teensy bit, it would help everypony behind you to see the stage."
Discord twisted around. The seats immediately around the Lord of Chaos were strangely empty. Still, there were a few ponies behind him courageous enough to look annoyed.
"Oh, how thoughtless of me," said Discord. "Thank you, dear Fluttershy, for your advice."
Discord shrank down to the size of a young colt. Unfortunately, as he became smaller, his top hat grew taller, so that he still blocked the view of the ponies behind him.
"Perhaps you could take off your hat?" suggested Fluttershy.
Discord said, in a squeaky, childish voice, "Moi? A gentlecreature, bereft of chapeau? You wound me, Fluttershy. Still, as your friend, I will accommodate you."
Discord removed his top hat, which instantly telescoped down to normal size. Perched atop Discord's head was a very confused-looking rabbit.
"Angel?" asked Fluttershy, concerned.
Discord glanced up. "Ah, there you are, my little friend. I wondered where you had got to. Oh, you seem lost! Here, let me help."
Discord grabbed Angel Bunny with his eagle claw and threw him into the top hat. Discord then tossed the top hat into the air, where it disappeared. "Voilà!" announced Discord, with satisfaction. "Home again, home again, jiggity-jig."
Fluttershy patted Discord's lion paw. "Thank you, Discord. You are a good friend."
Discord gave Fluttershy a sideways glance. "I'm trying, Fluttershy. For your sake, I'm trying."
Fluttershy beamed.
Discord slouched down in his seat. "Hmmph. Bored now. Let's get on with this," he said. From the air, he produced a lollipop as large as his head and licked at it, sulking.
Director Dash signaled to Octavia. Octavia nodded and relayed the message to Vinyl up in the booth and to the other members of her quartet. The strings fell silent for a moment, then struck up the traditional opening to Hearth's Warming Eve.
The lights in the theater dimmed. The ponies quickly scrambled to their seats. (A brave few even sat close to Discord.) The crowd settled. And the play began.
For some reason, I imagine that Rarity would delight in feisty old Granny Smith.
Patchy Belle's Canon is a ponification of Pachelbel's Canon, which I think would be perfect music for Hearth's Warming Eve.
I imagine that Discord's relationship to Fluttershy is something like Q's relationship to Picard: he's an enormous challenge that she has only the weakest handle on.
(This might amuse you: in my personal head-canon, I imagine Discord lives in Fluttershy's cottage, in a tiny hole-in-the-wall, and enjoys "adventures" with Fluttershy's critters, much like Urd in Adventures of Mini-Goddess. Wunathesdaze, I'll buckle down and write "Ah, My Little Goddess" for all you fans of Kosuke Fujishima.)
2271933
...I really want to see the adventures of Mini-Discord now.
"Oh, she dotes on you!" Ehehehehe. I believe it. AJ might not believe it, but I do, and I believe Granny does.
"You might never guess it, but Big Macintosh sings."
I believe it. Even better, it forms a nice little loophole within that story I wrote about him. Hot damn.
... I really should have expected Discord. Or at least not been nearly as shocked. This is a story about how far we've come since the beginning, after all. Still, the idea of just having him walk in and sit down like any other character (or at least as close as he can manage) is pretty brilliant. Any number of authors might have made "Discord shows up at this year's HWE pageant and everyone questions how serious he is about being reformed" the entire plot of their story, but this feels much more in line with the world of Equestria and the attitude of the show. After all, at the end of the opening two-parter Celestia comes back to Ponyville with a depowered Nightmare Moon in tow and the residents send their kids forward to give her flowers.
2272088
I want to second this idea of Discord being treated as normal (or as normal as possible: this was the right level of weirdness and confrontation) as being appropriate for the setting. It's very interesting. It's downright daring to treat him with anything resembling normality, but in a good way.
2252463 2252668 2253223
*affixes poster to the wall of the comments section*
i.imgur.com/AYBa6vl.png
*quietly exits*
You know, I'd bet Rainbow Dash has put in plenty of cold swarming evil, if the earlier chapters are any indication.
I've just realized that Discord would be a great pal to go the cinema with. He can make popcorn appear out of thin air. You would never run out of popcorn!
Should be interesting to see what Discord and the Princesses (who likely knew them) think of Dash's re-interpretation of the characters from the play!
2274558
You brought up an interesting point.
The history of Equestria is very flexible at this point. Hearth's Warming Eve, canonically, predates the rule of the Princesses, but where does the Reign of Discord fit in?
In my head-canon, I think of the G1 series as the Reign of Discord. (Oh, for crying out loud! What now? Witches? Evil Zebras that steal dreams? Lava monsters? Gimme a break!)
In my own mind:
Steven Magnet is the Eldest, the Lord of the Old Lands, when dinosaurs ruled the Earth. He has grown childish and vain, but he is still a power in the Free Lands.
Discord is the child of Typhon and Echidna, prisoners of Tartarus. Echidna has produced so many children, no two the same, that she hardly remembers Discord. (I have a story about this.)
I think it touching that so many other writers have depicted the young Discord, Celestia and Luna as friends.
2274707
FWIW, My headcanon is that Celestia and Luna were born towards the very end of G1 (possibly the result of the very last wish for a foal before Queen Majesty's magic finally faded away) and may have known Megan, Molly and Danny personally. However, they remained just humble commoners for many generations. Humble immortal commoners but content in their anonymity. Discord had always been a presence - he had been the real power behind Tirac and a lot of the Chimeric beasts, including the Windigoes and Changelings, are his creation. However, it wasn't until centuries after the Hearth Warming Night events that he openly revealed himself, having tired of subtly playing with the ponies like some draconic Loki.
After Discord had destroyed all hint of the old rulership, had turned the laws of nature on their heads and everything looked hopeless, Celestia and Luna made their appearance. They had spent centuries as wandering scholars, teachers and mages in the style of the Istari in Lord of the Rings and had led a band of heroes on a quest to find the Elements of Harmony. Then they engaged Discord and his forces openly, progressively destroying or driving into the wastelands his monster army before facing the Lord of Chaos himself.
In the post-war anarchy, Celestia and Luna took direct control of the nation as 'a temporary measure' until the pre-Discord government was restored but, somehow, that's never happened. The ponies have got too reliant on them (Celestia especially).
So, yeah, in my headcanon, the Celestial Sisters and Discord knew the principals in this drama. In the case of the alicorns, maybe some of them were even friends of theirs.
Approximate and Abridged Timeline
3000 years before present - Megan walks Ponyland (G1)
2000 years before present - Hearth-Warming Night
1500 years before present - Age of Chaos; alicorns take throne in aftermath of fall of Discord
1000 years before present - Sombra disembodied; Nightmare Moon exiled
2274707 Personally I have it so the princesses knew the founders, but only in the old world before they went to Equestria. The lost touch becasue Equestria is on another continent, not nothing, like they probably kept in touch with Clover. We do know Clover was Starswirl's student, and that Luna at least knew Starswirl personally. Discord then showed up, wiping out most of the history of the nation up to that point, albeit not on purpose, and enough time passed no one really remebered things right either. Thus you get the current flag in the play instead of the old one since Luna and Celestia never knew what is was.
Ah, Discord... down in front! :p And good on rarity to get Granny Smith out of the cold.
Soon, in your offshored theater: Hot Swarming Evil
A chaotic spectacle written, directed & produced by you favorite Discord: draconequus himself!
I can't decide which I love more, the epicness of Discord showing up, or the quiet, shining moment of Generosity from Rarity.
Excellent portrayal of "reformed" Discord.
Honestly, while I do like the exchange between Rarity and Granny Smith, I can't really see the point in including it. It seems like a distraction. But I may be wrong.
2326803
I went back to my notes for the reason: I was sort of tying up a loose end here while making a small point.
Rarity had made a fuss earlier about "the Princess's Booth" and how Twilight's proper place was there. In the back of my mind, I wondered what happened to the seat that Twilight gave up. Was it left empty, or given to somepony else? I thought it was entirely appropriate that Granny Smith, one of Ponyville's founders, should be given the seat of a Princess.
2339907
I have to say your Rarity is absolutely pitch-perfect. I'm impressed.
2615373 oh, i think i know where you got your username from, faolan
course, its just a guess.
Like everyone else has already said, Rarity is spot on. Your head-canon is just so right at every turn.
–Discord haughtily adjusted the monocle in his right eye. Then the second monocle in his left eye. He put on his pince-nez, to assist his third and fourth eyes. Then he settled his glasses over his fifth and sixth eyes.
"I don't know," Discord said. "Sometimes, I just want to make a spectacle of myself."
Oh my god, I died. Seriously, this line had me laughing so hard for some reason.
2271933 Watch and be amazed at the adventures of Discord, Discord, Discord and tiny Harry, the bear! They battle the evil rabbit emperor and his numerous lackeys in and about Fluttershy's cottage.
2274770 I love your comment, if only for the mental image of alicorns as Wizards from Lord of the Rings. It is a PERFECT idea, and also meshes wonderfully with my personal (although pretty much jossed) headcanon that alicorns are some sort of divinity, like demigods. (That can also fit nicely with the idea of ascension, if you'll recall your Greek mythology.)
Yes you are, Discord. Very.
5560531
Well played, my good sir, well played.
7046168 I borrowed that from Dennis the Menace I think. But it's still pretty funny.