For most of her life, Twilight Sparkle has taken on the teachings of Princess Celestia. She has found all of those years to be the most enjoyable of her life. If not for her, Twilight would not be the pony she is today. She wants to learn as much about magic as she can, as she strives to be the best magically-inclined unicorn she can be. But there comes a time when the teacher cannot teach more to the student than is necessary. For Twilight Sparkle, that time has come. The student is eager to learn more, and this is her chance to take on more teachings
Chapters (5)
I think we know what is going to happen. Maybe?...
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Can't know for sure. You'll have to wait, silly.
is this AU or does it take place before MMC?
I haven't read it yet, but I see it doesn't have a "Romance" tag...
Wait-wait-wait, I can't comprehend it.... another story where Luna becomes Twilight's teacher, but without TwiLuna shipping? 
That's new!
I'm enjoying this so far, though Twilight not bringing reading material on a long train ride does seem a bit OOC to me, as well as Pinkie throwing Fluttershy, though that did have me cracking up
Hmm...you've already shown me everything outside of the train sequence.
I did notice some repeating phrases here and there, and some past-present-future tenses used the wrong way.
The scene with Ember was a little hard to read, but if she's going to be a side character of the story, it's not really flaw because it needed to happen.
That said, all the things I've said before about your writing remains true. Very show accurate in style and characterization and it's an easy read.
2730 words in three weeks, a long wait? I've done worse. 2944 words in four weeks worse.
Anyway, since I'm not writing at the moment, may as well make myself productive (and doing proofreading like does help with any negative feelings I might have (stress, sadness), regardless):
but she felt a bit more secure around their company
In works better than around
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Surprisingly, the cover was made of some sort of leather instead of plain plastic like the usual books had, and deeply resembled the looks of an ancient tome, such as an old spell book of some sort
If I may politely suggest a rewrite to:
Surprisingly, the book had a cover made of some sort of leather instead of the plain plastic most books had, and greatly resembled the appearance of an ancient tome, such as an old spell book of some sort
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standing tall stood her elder sister Celestia
"Standing tall stood" is redundant, try "Standing tall was"
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It wasn't until her magic erupted that I had noticed how much of a potential she had for magic.
I think the last two words are a bit redundant
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While I had many students during the years of your absence...”
put have between I and had
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At the time, her eyes were close as if to focus on nothing on her thoughts.
close should be closed.
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While Twilight was waiting at the entrance to the castle, the inside of it anyway, she was getting annoyed.
This would flow better if written as:
Twilight, who was currently waiting inside of the castle entrance, was starting to get annoyed.
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She already knew what she came here for. She had a pretty good idea where she needed to go. Why did she have to wait for a guard to escort her, just to get confirmation from the Princess beforehand?
Try merging these three sentences like so:
She already knew what she came here for and had a pretty good idea where she needed to go, so why did she have to wait for a guard to escort her, just to get confirmation from the Princess beforehand?
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It was obvious to her this was a new guard, so it was apparent that he did not know who Twilight was.
a bit of redundant wording, here. Try:
It was obvious to her this was a new guard, so it was not surprising that he did not know who Twilight was.
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The patience was killing her.
I think you meant anticipation
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the mane was just as free-flowing as Celestia's mane
remove the second use of the word mane, since we know that Luna's mane is being compared to Celestia's
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When she turned around, she was surprised to find Celestia's younger sister before her,
If she already knew it was Luna behind her, as was implied in the last paragraph, then why was she surprised to see her when she turned around? This needs a bit of explanation.
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Twilight would not ever be where she is now in her life
The present tense doesn't make sense in a story written in past tense. Change is to was here. Also not ever could be shortened to never for the sake of flow.
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Twilight wasn't sure how to feel about this, almost just as much as Celestia had felt.
The first and second half of this sentence don't make sense when put together, and I'm not sure what to do to fix it.
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Before Twilight could respond, she fainted without warning, which very much surprised the pony standing over her. "Twilight?!"
Better written as:
Without warning, and without having time to give a response, Twilight fainted, surprising the pony standing over her. "Twilight?!"
Though I admit that it's still not perfect.
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leaving Celestia and the unconscious Twilight inside alone
swap inside and alone
BTW, if you're still looking for a proofreader and/or someone to bounce ideas off of by, say, Thursday, and you don't mind someone who is easily distracted at times (see: it taking me a good while to post this up, though other issues were at play), I may be able help out.
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See, this is exactly why I needed a proofreader. I didn't realized I've made so many mistakes without closely looking. I would really love your help if it's not too much for you.
2492511 It shouldn't be too much, especially when I consider the fact that I can use it to decompress. I tend to spot these things as I'm reading through a story anyway, and, when I feel like it, just pull up notepad and copy over any sentences that I see have issues with notations about the issues below (as you saw in my comment). In this case, I did that during my read through (taking about 15 minutes), and then just got lazy in posting them up. Doing so before the story is published shouldn't be too different, except for maybe how I note the errors I find.
I can go ahead and send you a PM on EqF sometime in the next few days (probably Monday or Tuesday, depending on my mood and sleep schedule) detailing all the info I'll need and giving you any you might need, and we can work out the details from there. Sound good?
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Yes, that can definitely work well for me. I should thank you for this.
I still would've at least liked to hear what you liked about the chapter.
2493350 I did forget to mention that didn't I? I blame lack of sleep, but I'll give my opinion now.
It's an interesting setup to...something, as well as a good way to she that the teaching duties are being handed from Celestia to Luna, and I'm still curious as to where this will go. Overall, though, a good, engaging chapter that keeps the plot moving at the pace you chose for it (A bit slow for my tastes I admit, but well within the realm of good pacing overall)
I noticed two PMs on EQF, and I'll get to them when I've had a bit more sleep, but I did notice the following errors (far far fewer than before, you're getting better):
she had figured her teacher to make a few jokes every know and then.
know should be now
After about a minute, they approached a guard that was busy walking around on guard duty.
walking around on guard duty? Patrolling the hallways is a clearer and more concise way of putting it
that made her more happy, as the night was her element.
more happy works better as happier
It was shown to be ominous with the image it gave off.
Er, this seems redundant, but I don't know what you're trying to say, so...
Whens she finished, her glorious wings spread out and wide, extending about a great length of feet in wingspan
Whens should be when
Anyway, I'm still wondering where this is going. You're dong a damn good job of leading the reader on, and rhyming Luna was great (though I ended up reading that line in Zecora's voice). I can't wait to see where this goes.
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Ugh, I was pretty sure I saw all errors that needed fixing when I went to edit the chapter before publishing it. Either way, you weren't responding to my PMs, so I went ahead and uploaded the chapter anyway. I have patience, but not that much patience, especially for something that took me this long to write.
As for Luna's rhyming at the end, that was just a little something I thought of to add at the end.
I don't they understood what Twilight was saying.Sounded like to me like she had mastered everything else wanted to learn bigger and more complex magic,not that she had reached the peak of her magic potential/ability.If anything she's either bored or wants more power
What happened that made you cancell this story?
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Man, it's been over three and a half years.
It was due to a lack of ideas. I didn't really know where to go with the story after finishing up with Chapter 5. I just gave up after that and started working on another story.