Dreamstrider: Tale of the Impossible

by Alasdair Edom

Chapter ten: Another unusual start

Chapter ten

"Deep breaths. Deeeeeep breaths..."

I feel like I'm a turbine motor on overdrive right now, I just can't keep clam. I had been suppressing my excitement until now, just so I don't mess up, but now I've been here a day and got somewhere to stay, all my excitement is flowing out of me like a torrent of water.

"Eeeee! If only my friends could see me now! HAHA!"

I need to calm down, might as well get started on that walk.

I start walking the same direction I did yesterday, towards the hall, and I plan to go from the hall out to the edge of town and walk all the way around until I make it back to the hall. Hopefully without too many questions as to why I'm now a mare, but I might as well prepare for the worst...

"Hey there!"

My mind makes a tyre screech sound as I hear Roseluck greeting me from a few yards away. "And this is why you don't play with magic kids."

My brain has just gone on holiday and has left a note saying: "Gone to Hawaii to relax and watch you fail on television! Good luck!"

You know what? I don't care about plans anymore, lets just get this over with.

"Hey Roseluck! Nice to see you again!" I greet, knowing it's a little cheesy, but it's cheerful.

"Hi! I... Er..."

"You okay Roseluck?" I say, knowing exactly why she is stumbling over her words, but I'm playing this innocent.

"Well... When I last saw you..."

"I was a colt? Yeah... About that..." Loki mode: Activate.

"Yesterday, after I got back to the library, the librarian said she needed somepony to help test a new potion of hers."

Doing good... "She said it wasn't dangerous, so I said yes, and the effect was... Unexpected to say the least."

Roselucks eyes widen a little in thought, then raised an eyebrow at me, "Aren't you a little embarrassed to be walking around like this? And why hasn't Twilight reversed the effect?"

Damn. Both are good excuses, but while I'm in Loki mode, nothing will beat me in a battle of wits.

"I'm not actually that bothered about it, and I decided to stay like this incase there were other undocumented side-effects of the potion."

"Thats very selfless of you to volunteer like that, after all, there could be terrible side-effects."

"It's nothing, I'm just helping a friend." I say, trying not to be too cliché, "And if something were to happen, I doubt it would be too bad."

If I hadn't been a part of fast-paced sports on Earth, I probably wouldn't have noticed the momentary flash of thought across Roselucks eyes. The emotion that surrounded that thought was... Strange... Almost like two, or three different feelings or thoughts in conflict with one another.

"Hey, that sounds familiar!"

"No shit Sherlock."

"What? It's your own damn fault that you have so many different voices in your head anyway."

"And your in my head, so shut it."

"Ugh, fine."

"So, what are you doing today? Any exciting endeavours, or dangerous deeds?"

The sudden change of attitude catches me off-guard, and this shows a little in my expression. If she had said that in any other way, I would had dismissed it as sarcasm, but she didn't say it sincerely either...

Is she playing with me?

I quickly shove the thought out of my head, I'm just still thinking human. Ponies don't get lusty or flirt with strangers, thats just in cheesy fictions... Right?

Either my mind is being perverted, or this is really happening. Either way... God give me strength.

I keep a cool expression and continue on without my mind doing Twilight vs Pinkie on me.

"Nah, just wondering around town, maybe visiting a few friends, then have a nice walk along the river."

"My, sounds like quite the day you've got ahead of you. I wouldn't want to get in your way."

"You know, either way, it does kinda sound like she is messing with you... Among other things."

"I would tell you to shut up... *Gah* You know what? Lets have a little fun shall we? How about I change from the defensive, to the offensive?"

"Is that such a wise idea? Think of all the things that could go wrong..."

"What? It's not like you, or me have had an opportunity to meddle like this before. And I can see why people find this fun too. And anyway, who's head is this?"

"Fine. Just if something goes wrong, it's not my fault."

"Fair enough."

Never done this before, but as they say; "Practise makes perfect"... *Groan*

"Oh, I don't mind. I don't have any urgent appointments for today." I say is a way that would make it apparent to Roseluck, (If she was flirting with me), that I'm interested.

"Such a shame I'm stuck at this stall. Say, would you like to 'Hang out' sometime?"

"That would be brilliant."

"Drop by my house anytime. I'm the fifth house down the right along from Sugarcube Corner." She says almost seductively, but restrains herself due to being in public.

"I'll make sure to "Drop by" sometime then." I say, copying her seductive tone, but still holding a restrained expression.

"Look forward to it.

"But I don't want to stop you from your daily endeavors now. See you sometime in the future." She says, slowly returning back to her normal tone.

"I'm sure you will." I return to my normal tone and we exchange our goodbyes as I get back to my, "Morning endeavours".

"...What just happened?"

HAHAHAHAHA! Thats what you get for switching off stupid brain!

"...That wasn't at all what I had hoped would happen."

"Deal with it."

"Smooth moves."

"Glad you think so"

"I was being sarcastic."

"Well I stole your face!"

"Har-de-har."

I mentally stick my tongue out, because I'm having too much fun to care. I don't know any rational reason why I do silly spontaneous things like that, it just happens.

"Also, brain, can you tell me what the fuck I just got into?"

"...You either just started a sexual relationship with a pony, Roseluck no less, or you just became Ponyville's official town whore."

...

"...Thanks... For being an asshole..."

"You know, I can get 'Asshole' up here to join the conversation..."

"SHUT. THE FUCK. UP."

" You're the one who asked my opinion in the first place."

"I asked for your opinion, not for your smart-assery and cynicism."

"But who would I be if I could not be critique?"

"You would be bearable, and generally not make me want to dissect my own brain."

"Good thing that you can cope."

"Just only. I'm not even sure how I do it sometim-"

I get called out of my head and back into reality as I walk into a wall, banging my head and generally causing lots of physical pain. Not to mention the strange looks I seem to be getting by everypony who witnessed the event.

"Just shut up, I'm beginning to like walking into walls."

"I have some things to do anyway, besides making you walk into walls."

"I'm happy for you."

At this point I just kept on walking in silence, both inwardly and outwardly. I just want to go uninterrupted through my planned route, and avoid anymore arguments with my brain followed by smashing into walls.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the time I can think straight again, I find myself at the edge of town and conveniently on the dirt path to leads to Fluttershy's cottage. I think better of going to visit Fluttershy because I'm not in the mood to cope with such a timid mind.

Not to say I have anything against her or her timid nature, it's the fact that my 'Argument' with myself has taken it's toll on my patience and I don't want to snap in front of Fluttershy. If I ever made her cry... I would never forgive myself.

I look around and see the river that flows nearby Fluttershy's home, and decide to follow it left. If I'm correct, then I should be able to go left and at some point reach Rarity's and drop in for... Whatever it is that friends drop in for.

I start walking, basking in the sunshine, and listening to the relaxing sounds of the river as I pass beside it. It's peaceful, and peaceful is what I need...

Too peaceful.

"This is too quiet, Pinkie usually throws a welcoming party on their first day, and this is is my second stay here. not counting my arrival..."

"She never forgets these things, the only reason she could have held it off so long is..."

"She is still planning out the party..."

"And that must mean it's an important party..."

"Which means it gonna be a big party."

"Exactly."

"And this is why having another me inside my head is awesome."

"How about superextremeawesomemazing?"

"Aim high kid, but don't aim for the impossible."

"Touché."

I walk on with a smile on my face, in better spirits from my brief conversation with myself. But despite the lift in mood, I still feel worn out from the heated argument with my brain. Of all things to argue with, it had to be my own brain.

The cheered effect slowly slips away until I'm stuck with yet another blank face, and deep thought consumes me again. It's either that, or I go into a depressed state for an hour.

I'm thinking too much, I just need to sit down and calm myself. I see a nice grassy bank of the river I could sit on and stop myself from over-thinking. I hated over-thinking.

...Why am I staring at my reflection in the river?

I give out a loud groan and collapse on the ground, curling up into a ball, tucking my tail close to my body, and facing the river. Thinking... Thinking...

What am I even thinking about? I have no idea, I just keep thinking for some reason, my mind doing its own thing and leaving my body and consciousness lying here in the embrace of Gaia.

It feels... Like I'm in a lovers arms, cradled like a newborn and without a care in the world. I feel like I'm being embraced by the earth itself, and I am loving it back with equal measure... Whatever is going on, I don't want it to stop. I thought back to when I was young, when my mother embraced me, and how it felt so warm... And secure... Like I was in the safest place in the world.

I just lay there for who knows how long, but no more than an hour. At least, until I heard hoofsteps in the soft grass from behind me.

"Um... Excuse me, are you okay?"

The irony... I specifically avoid visiting Fluttershy in case I snap in front of her, and instead, she comes to me... Oh well, best go with what the universe throws at me.

"Hey Fluttershy." I say, just lifting my head over my tail so my voice isn't muffled.

"Oh my, is that you Dreamstrider?"

I can't help but smile, if not facing her, at her courtesy for which she was renowned for. Not to mention a huge factor in making her the most adorable pony ever.

"Sure is," I say, changing position and lifting my head as I face her, "I'm just chilling..."

I make a huff and sink back down into my previous position, except facing Fluttershy, and move my eyes to the ground.

"Just chilling and thinking about life."

"Okay..." She says simply, bolting her eyes around and fidgeting a little, all traits of when Fluttershy is trying to ask some sort of question.

"Um... If you don't mind me asking... How come you were... Um..."

"A colt yesterday?"

She just nods and shyly waits for an answer, one that I have come to expect having answering a lot the next couple of days. I look around a little with just my eyes to check if there was anyone coming down the road, and there wasn't.

"The story I tell everyone is that Twilight got me to test a potion and it turned my into a mare, because no-pony actually knew me as a mare except you, Twilight and the others, and everypony knew me as a colt originally.

"The real story is that I was messing about with magic yesterday morning and decided to test a genderswap thingemie, and I was silly enough to go out as a colt, so now I have to explain to everypony why I'm now a mare because they think I'm supposed to be a colt."

We both stay there in silence for a few minutes, as neither of us can think if anything to add to the conversation. That is until, ironically, the quietest of us speaks up.

"Um... Are you sure you're okay? You don't really seem... Um... Okay..."

No... No, I guess I'm not. I am just sitting here next to a river, thinking about the fabric of the universe, and procrastinating to a degree. Problem is, I don't know what the problem is... And in thinking that I've just started another paradox in my head.

"No..." I mumble through my tail.

She slowly makes her way over to my side and sits down next to me.

"What's wrong? Can I help?" She softly says as she supportively rests a hoof on my back.

Great, now I have two motherly beings comforting me. Well, I can't complain as their not conflicting with one another. If anything, their complementing each other, whether either side realises it.

"I don't know Fluttershy..." Beyond caring about withholding any kind of information, because with Fluttershy next to me, doing that just... Just wouldn't make sense, and would seem... Wrong...

"I have dual-personalities, except there is more than just one alternate me, and they're all stuck in my head like some kind of lounge."

I dig further into my tail, and close my eyes as if in an attempt to hide from whatever is making me like this.

"It's just... Hard... To cope sometimes..." I mumble through the mess of unkempt hair that is my tail. Fluttershy just keeps quiet and listens while she soothes me.

"And I was also thinking about why I have magic. Why me? I'm not special or anything, and I appreciate having these powers... But do I really deserve them?"

I don't think I do. I'm not special, I'm not outgoing, I'm not worthy of anything. It was out of my selfishness that I came here to escape from the human race that I'm a part of.

I could had stayed, but what then? Become a master magician at carnivals and do impossible things for money? Get fought over by countries who want to study me for their own selfish needs? Live in solitude from the world because I'm considered a freak? No, I left to escape all that, and come to a place I know is accepting of who you are, and what you are. Here I can be who I am, and also live in a considerably better world than the one I was born on.

And even through all that... Did I really make the right choice?

I tighten the ball like shape I've curled into, and squeeze my eyes closed in an attempt to hide from myself. Fluttershy notices and tries to comfort me through the situation which who-knows-how I got myself into.

"Hush-sush... Don't be so hard on yourself." She says softly, now with her foreleg draped over me, with Fluttershy slowly moving from side-to-side as a mother would when she is comforting her child. Something I should've come to expect from Fluttershy as she is the Element of Kindness.

"Why wouldn't you deserve it? You're a wonderful pony."

"I don't know who I am Fluttershy. All I know is I'm an alone filly who went too far from home out of their own stupidity."

Right now, I've lost pretty much all composure. I'm not crying, it's not that kind of breakdown, but I felt as if I was falling apart.

Which choice was the right one? did I make the right choice? Was there even a right choice? Why am I tearing myself apart here?

"You're not a filly, you're a young mare like me. And you're not stupid, your a very intelligent pony."

I give a sigh, "Let me rephrase that; By my age I'm considered young where I'm from, and I also consider myself a filly. And maybe I'm not stupid, but my mind is about as well ordered as a library with all the books thrown on the floor with all their pages ripped out and thrown into the wind with about ten pounds worth of melted chocolate on everything, and I can be incredibly ignorant sometimes."

I open my eyes and look up at Fluttershy. She is just looking in a very thoughtful manner from the ground, up at me, and then back at the ground again, probably trying to come up with something to counter my self-denouement.

She eventually looks back at me, and straight into my eyes with a motherly sternness.

"What you said about being alone is not true, you have friends like me, Twilight, Applejack, Rainbow, Pinkie, and Rarity to keep you safe and help you when you hit bad times."

I was taken aback by Fluttershy's firm and confident tone, usually she keeps a quiet and gentle tone for everything, but the tone she used just now I have never heard from her before. And thats saying something, considering I've seen every episode of MLP up to the season three finale. It was almost un-Fluttershy like, but she wasn't doing 'New Fluttershy', or Flutter-rage, but a completely new tone. And it made me feel... Safe.

"I..." I manage to stutter through and out of my mouth with everything going on in my head.

"You really consider... Me, as a friend?"

She looks at me with a slightly surprised face, then replies, "Of course I do! The more friends you have to better."

"I... Never thought anypony would care about me that much." I relax a little out of my protective ball shape, and lean into Fluttershy.

"Thank you Fluttershy." I close my eyes and stay close to Fluttershy, dwelling in the moment for as long as I can.

Suddenly, an old Incan proverb pops up in me head, just like that. I give a smile and a small chuckle, Fluttershy notices and looks at me with soft eyes.

"What is it?" She asks with an angelic smile.

""A rich pony is not determined by their financial wealth, but a rich pony is determined by their wealth of followers."

"This, I know to be true. Especially now." I finish with a smile.

She gives a shy giggle and looks away momentarily, "My... Who said that?"

"An old civilization back home. They weren't some of the nicest ponies, but their philosophy along with a similar civilization on the same continent was exceptional."

"Well then... Do you think you're a rich pony?"

...

Do I? Am I? What am I?

Looking back at my life, I don't see many "Riches" to count, only enough to "Keep me out of the red".

I must have blanked out for a minute or two, because when I came back to reality, Fluttershy was gently shaking me and was looking at me with her smile gone and looking a little worried.

"No." I simply say.

"No? No what?"

"No I don't consider myself a rich pony."

"But... But you're such a nice pony! I'm sure you had lots of friends back home." She says, clear that she wants to get me feel better.

"Not really many of note... And anyway, they don't really count a dimension away." I say shifting my view from Fluttershy to the now very interesting grass.

"All friends count, no matter how far away they are!" Fluttershy says as she uses her hoof to gently move my head to look at her.

"And maybe they are far away now, but true friends always have a place in your heart." She punctuates this point by very gently poking me in the chest, "And you have friends here too."

"Maybe I do Fluttershy," I say as I look deep into her aqua eyes, "But did I make the right choice coming here? Leaving my family and friends behind for my own pursuits?

"Sure, I would have been called a freak and people would try to lock me up and throw away the key, but can I call myself loyal when I left my friends behind? Can I call myself generous when I didn't offer anyone the chance to come with me? Can I call myself honest when still have to lie in order to keep myself safe?"

My gaze begins to falter and drops down to the ground, "I could go back, but what then Fluttershy? I used to live in a world of technology and science, I would be locked up as a test subject and be called un-human, and be denied human rights. What would I tell my friends? That I'm a dimension-jumping planeswalker? In my world, I would be classed as insane! Because in my world, if it can't be explained by science, then it's not real! It's impossible! An abomination of nature!"

I return my gaze to Fluttershy with a newborn sternness, "I would be called an abomination Fluttershy! A freak!

"I could go back and become "Normal", hide who I am under a mist of deceit and lies. But then what? I would be hiding who I am and wasting my life! I don't want to waste my life, I want to live it... I just want to live...."

I turn my gaze away from Fluttershy and begin to grind my head into the grass and dirt. I don't care if it hurts, If it stops be from lashing out at Fluttershy, then I'm going to do it.

I can't see Fluttershy, but I assume she is either mulling over what I just said, or getting ready to bolt in a trail of tears off to her cottage.

"Dreamstrider..."

I stop grinding my head into the ground and just go limp, splaying myself on the ground like a ragdoll with scratches, mud, and grass all over it's face.

"You made the choice you had to make darling, there was no right or wrong."

That wasn't Fluttershy's voice...

I lift up my head to see Rarity looking at me from a few hoofsteps away, with her elegantly styled amethyst mane, and alabaster coat.

"No-pony blames you for your choice. You faced ridicule in your own come and you saw a chance to go somewhere where you could be yourself, and took it."

Rarity pulls one of her white handkerchiefs out of nowhere and begins to clean my face with it.

"But... What if I did make a mistake? What if-"

"You shouldn't be so hard on yourself darling, no-pony blames you, I don't blame you, and neither does Fluttershy."

She finishes cleaning up my face and I can start to feel the scrapes on my face begin to burn. I look down In thought, then back up to Rarity.

"You're right... There was no right or wrong choice, I saw a place where I could live my life and be who I am, and went there. I... Shouldn't blame myself for a fault that isn't mine."

I turn to Fluttershy and begin to apologise, "I'm sorry that I made an outburst like that infront of you-"

"It's fine... I'm just glad I could help."

"I... Well... I guess we're okay then..."

I turn back to Rarity, "So... What are you doing here Rarity?"

"Oh, I was just on my way to ask Fluttershy if she wanted to come to the Spa with me when I overheard your little conversation. I am in desperate need of a hooficure." Rarity announces in her usual over-dramatic fashion.

"That would be nice..."

"Oh spectacular!" Rarity says as Fluttershy walks over to Rarity.

"Dreamstrider, darling, would you like you come with us?"

Well... This is different...

"Um... I don't really have the bits with me..."

"Oh nonsense! I'll pay. A gift between friends!"

"I... Uh..."

"Oh come on dude! Your not a guy anymore, give it a chance!"

I take a deep breath, "Alright then."

"Splendid! We'll make our way there now."

I nod and begin to walk beside them as we make our way back into town.

Author's Note:

Sorry if if it's taking awhile to get the chapters out as of late, April has been a pretty full-on month for me because of Easter, holidays, and my birthday all taking place within a few weeks.

Hopefully this chapter isn't too all over the place (I've been writing this one on-and-off), but I hope it's okay enough to be understood.

Comments

[Alasdair Edom]

I'm sooo sorry that I'm taking so long to finish the next chapter, but my writers block isn't budging. I might have to mark this story as On Hiatus if this keeps on.
I PROMISE that I will get around this writers block, I'm just having some trouble at the moment as I'm writing about everything but the next chapter.
I'm really sorry everyone but please be patient, I'm working on it as hard as I can

Hopefully I'll have the chapter done some time this millenia.

[Hirovard]

Come on! This is an awesome story. Buck up and show that block who's the mare! ;)

[Alasdair Edom]

2702875 Thanks for the encouragement :D I'll buck that block to the moon! (Obvious reference)

I've made a little progress on the next chapter, but I'm (very) easily distracted, and I've been occupied with writing chapters for my concept-stage fics, and the next chapter of my other fic. But I will get round to making chapter eleven! I won't quit this story (Mainly because if I did, my mind would get full of crazy again), and the next chapter is inevitable

I'm also glad someone thinks my story is good ^.^ I personally don't think it's that brilliant, but I still write it because I find it fun.

Thanks for the encouragement, it's what turbo-boosts my day x

[Hirovard]

Np, I just spent today rereading it for the third time.

[Alasdair Edom]

2703168 Dayum! You've really re-read it three times? I feel honoured

[Hirovard]

I enjoy your story simply because I feel like myself and dreamstrider have a number of things in common (minus the magic)

[Alasdair Edom]

2703211 Well, score for me I guess :3

(On a slightly unrelated note) I've actually contemplated if Dreamstrider's magic is too powerful and makes him/her too powerful, and as a result he/she will have some special rules put in place when using magic so I don't end up writing a Mary Sue.

[Hirovard]

As long as she cannot destroy the universe, or the planet for that matter, on a whim then all's good IMO.

One request, when dream can fly properly, make her do a barrel roll!

[youtube=http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wIkJvY96i8w]

[Alasdair Edom]

2703267 She won't, she's far too sensible for that... Right? Anyway, I will most certainly carry out this request :3

[Hirovard]

2703282

Yes... Sensible.

Also AWESOME! :D

[Alasdair Edom]

2703304 I aim to please <3

[Hirovard]

And please you have :3