Jokers Wild

by blowngasket

The Crazy Thing About Surprises

Chapter 4: The Crazy Thing About Surprises

"So there I was, face in the piece of cake, the griffin ambassador just looking at me as I looked directly at him. After a few awkward seconds, he started to laugh, and even to this day I was surprised that I didn't lose my head," Perry chuckled as he was telling stories to the group of girls. Spike and Twilight, having heard most of them already, just sat back and let him enjoy himself. They made their way over to Sugarcube Corner for Perry's party, knowing that a Pinkie party would seal the deal on the fun loving jesters stay. "...and then, Twily wandered the castle for hours, trying to find her stuffed doll. It was the funniest thing I have ever seen. She stopped sleepwalking soon afterwards. Most interesting way to meet someone," Perry smiled as he finished his story. Twilight, only hearing the end of it, had anger written all over her face.

"Twilight, how the heck did you manage to leave your doll in the icebox?" Rainbow chuckled. This only further made the situation worse for Perry, noticing her beginning to mumble a spell under her breath.

"Now Twilight...no need to be angry. We all do silly things every now and then..." Perry tried to reason with her, but it was no good at this point, especially when the sun got shadowed and he heard the familiar ending for the spell she was using.

"Lightning!" Twilight yelled as a bolt shot from the cloud forming above Perry. He started to twitch as the electricity flowed through him, leaving him a convulsing mess of a man where he stood.

"Fine...no mo...re Twilight stories..." he spoke slowly, the occasional twitch causing his words to be slightly broken. Fluttershy walked over to him slowly.

"Ar-Are you alright Perry?" she asked quietly. He looked over to her and gave a nod.

"Twilight will have to try harder if she wants to hurt me!" he laughed. Fluttershy smiled at him until he got up close, causing her to freeze in place as he grabbed her hands gently. "It's so wonderful to know that you care for me!" he exclaimed, chuckling at the petrified look she gave as he did this.

"Perry, quit teasin' her. You should know by now how she is," Applejack said, shaking her head. He looked over to her scratching the back of his head.

"I am sorry. It's just that it's adorable the way she becomes a statue like that," Perry said apologetically.

"I-I'm fine..." Fluttershy started to stir again. "Just...surprised...me...that's all," Twilight sighed watching them all. She let out a small smile after turning around walking away. As much as he infuriated her, Perry was still a good person, and she was glad it was him to be staying here. Looking back at Perry, still telling jokes and stories to the girls and Spike, she started to wonder about his mask, like many times before. She has never actually seen his face, no matter how hard she tried. Whenever she would ask, he would always give a different ridiculous answer that could not have happened, from the mask being super glued to his face, which could easily be fixed, to it being a mystical gift from the great mighty dragon king, granting him immortality as long as he wore it. She pondered in mental silence for the rest of the short walk, before being stopped feet from their destination.

"WE ARE HERE!" Pinkie yelled out as they arrived to Sugarcube Corner. Perry sniffed the air here and sighed happily.

"What a magnificent scent. It's a shame that the place looks closed," he said, looking through the window and seeing no lights."

"Don't worry yourself, Perry. I work here, so you can head on in," Perry nodded and headed towards the door. Twilight, noting the lack of lights and the odd dead quiet coming from the building, looked over at Spike nervously and whispered into his ear.

"Spike...you did tell her no surprise parties, right?" Spikes eyes widened, giving Twilight the answer she needed. She tried to quickly turn to Perry but he along with everyone already disappeared into the darkness. With an all too sudden flash, the darkness was drowned out by the lights quickly coming to life along with the combined screams of those hidden in it.

"SUUURRRPPRRISSSSEEEEEEE!!!!!????" the nice sized crowd yelled as Pinkies streamer cannons fired towards the group, though something was now very off. They looked around carefully, but try as they might, they could not find the guest of honor.

"Perry?" all the girls said in unison, looking around the room from him. He had just vanished from sight. The small gathering of people that were originally hiding were more confused then anyone else.

"Did we just waste the surprise?" one of them said, still looking around. Judging from the looks, the place was definitely ready for a party. Snacks punch and Pinkie even called in a favor to get DJ PON-3, aka Vinyl Scratch, to be the entertainment. How she could have possibly managed to pull that one off within the course of three hours would still be debated along with the meaning of life, and why hot dog buns came in packages of eight, while hot dogs themselves came in packages of ten. The blue haired girl, relaxing casually behind the sound system, could only smile as everyone looked around, lost and completely confused.

"Everything's ready!" she yelled from where she sat. Everyone looked over to her, and to their surprise, Perry was casually sitting on one of her speakers holding a Microphone.

"Oh you all are just too wonderful," he stated as everyone just stared at him in shock and amazement. "Well, I have two announcements to make. Number one, SURPRISE!" he yelled out.

"Perry here is one of my biggest fans..." Vinyl started. "...and the king of counter surprise parties. No joke. He has coined that one. I'll tell ya, if there is anyone out there that can possibly out party me...it's not him."

"Hey, I totally resemble that," Perry said jokingly into the mike, earning quite a few chuckles from the audience.

"But this crazy man has definitely comes close. Sorry, bro, but you will never be able to out party me. You can continue with your announcement thingie now," Vinyl said, getting everything ready.

"Secondly, Twilight. You can tell Celestia that she wins. I'll stay! Besides, trains are terribly boring," he said dully. "And for all of you, you have been a great audience so I guess an encore is in order! HIT IT DJ!" Vinyl nodded as she put on a record. Music started playing as he jumped on top of a table from the speaker, dancing energetically before starting to sing loudly.

Everyone started by watching on in total shock. Being surprised by the intended victim was definitely new. But seeing how he was getting into it, people couldn't help but start to dance as well. Twilight still stood there, mouth agape at his actions, though the rest of them didn't need an invitation to start dancing. Even Fluttershy, who was normally trying her best to not be noticed in these kind of situations, found it quite fun to dance. She was dancing in a corner away from the crowd of people, but dancing none-the-less.

Folks in the crowd started to cheer his name as he was dancing and singing on the table. Perry was getting into it and loved every minute of it. Even Spike was getting into it, slowly dancing closer to Rarity to try to dance with her, only to be knocked over by a wildly dancing blond. She apologized and helped him up. Spike couldn't help but notice her strange eyes, but she was gone into the crowd before he even had a chance to let her know it was fine.

Even Twilight, who was in a state of initial shock and awe at everything irrational happening all at one, couldn't stay away forever. She started to dance as well, enjoying the party for being a party, whether Perry had commandeered it or not.

Perry started to whip out the air guitar as he was jamming across the table and really getting into it doing all sorts of fancy moves and causing the group of people there to whistle and cheer. The song, finally coming to its finale, ended with a bang as cannons filled with confetti were shot out, showering everyone with the colorful paper. Then the silence came, giving everyone the time they needed to soak in everything they had just witnessed, and for Perry to catch his breath before retiring from the tabletop.

"Thank you Ponyville! Perry loves you all!" he yelled as he tossed the mike back to Vinyl, who simply held out her hand expectantly and caught it. He did a backflip of the table landing it perfectly. Everyone, completely blown away by the sporadic and energetic newcomer, crowded him. They were asking questions many questions which he gladly answered. Of course most of the questions about his mask went in the direction of strange and completely nonsensical, but he was having a heck of a good time today and was glad to be here.

---------- ---------- ----------

The party finally died down after a couple of hours. Pinkie was busy cleaning up along with the help of Fluttershy. Applejack, Rainbow, and Rarity, who had to be up early to take care of job related issues, had left to go and get as much sleep as possible. Perry, having possibly enjoyed himself a bit too much, was face down on a table, groaning about too much super choco cake. The argument between him and Pinkie about there actually being a limit still up in the air, Twilight and Spike decided to simply sit with him, still chuckling about his self caused condition.

"When did you even have time to eat a half a cake, and how do you even do it?" Twilight spoke to him. "I didn't even see you take off your mask," Perry looked over to her and softly spoke.

"I have a second mouth on my stomach which I use to eat," he told them. His stomach started growling as he then and again proceeded to plant his face against the table. "So Twilight, think you can tell me where I will be staying?" he asked from his position. "Celestia told me to use some sort of private cottage, and that you knew of its location."

"The old vacation house?" she asked, making sure she wasn't wrong. He nodded, remembering that much about it. "It's a ways near the other end of Ponyville, by the Everfree Forest. Fluttershy?" She called over the pink haired girl carrying plates and cups. "Think you can take him to his place? It's that small empty cottage at the edge of the town. It should be right by your home."

"Ummm...ok...I guess," she said to Twilight. "If that isn't a problem for you, Perry."

"Not at all, Fluttershy. It would be a pleasure," Perry responded to her. She smiled and went to gather her belongings. Twilight got uncomfortably close to Perry and started whispering into his ear.

"If you even think of doing anything despicable to her, I'll do things so horrible to you that the punishment will forever be know as...getting Perryed..." she grinned almost evilly, causing Perry to shudder slightly.

"I would never even think of such a thing, lady Twilight. Your incriminating look apon me hurts," he responded honestly.

"Okay then!" she smiled sweetly again as Fluttershy reentered the room. "See you two later!" Twilight waved as Perry slowly moved up from his seat. He gathered his bags and headed towards the door. He opened it for Fluttershy, noting Twilight back at her seat slowly running a finger across her neck. If not for the mask he would have looked quite scared for his current situation. Twilight was always so nice to everyone, but when it came to Perry, she knew she could have a little fun and be a little mean. Both knew it was...mostly harmless fun, but it didn't help knowing Twilight's more wicked and sadistic side better than anyone else.

Perry followed Fluttershy out of the building, walking side by side with her as they slowly made their way to his temporary home. "So, Fluttershy, I never found out what it is that you do here," he asked as they walked. She nodded, looking over to him and starting to speak.

"Well, I take care of the animals around here, injured or lost," she told him, feeling a bit more comfortable talking about her job than most other things. It made her legitimately happy, giving even her meek personality a small sense of pride.

"Does it pay well?" Perry asked.

"Not really. I usually make my living taking care of others pets. I'm not a vet, but since Ponyville doesn't have one, the people here usually bring them to me. I'm more than happy to help, getting to make all of those cute little critters all better. It is enough to live comfortably, though sometimes those animals can also get really rowdy. I wouldn't have it any other way though!" she smiled happily towards Perry. He couldn't help but feel giddy at how happy she looked, though it was hidden by ceramic and paint.

"You know, Fluttershy, this has got to be the most I have ever heard you say," he chuckled. She blushed and looked towards the ground.

"Sorry...it's not that...well I don't like...to talk, it's just...umm..." she quietly spoke to him. He gently placed his hand on her head, causing her to freeze up again at the sudden contact.

"It's fine. I understand. In my line of work, actions tend to be more powerful than words. You're a good person, Fluttershy. Don't ever change. The world needs more people like you in it," even with his hand on her head, she managed to look towards him, her hair hiding her blush and smile. "Now let's go! Don't want to keep you out too late, Twilight would have my head," he said to her, taking his hand off her head. He started a goofy march down the road, earning a soft laugh out of his guide. She quickly followed him, though walking more normally than he was. They finally managed to make it to the cottage after about half an hour of walking and simple chit chat.

"Well, this is it..." Fluttershy told Perry as he looked over the place. It was a nice one floor cottage. A good size, but a bit bland for his tastes, which he would most likely remedy when he had the chance. "Well...I have to get home now. Have a good night, Perry," she said to him, waving and turning to make her way back home.

As Fluttershy started walking away she heard footsteps behind her. Looking over her shoulder she watched as he casually strolled behind her. After a few more steps, she stopped and turned around, causing him to stop as well. "Excuse me for asking...but why are you following me?" she asked, slightly nervous at his strange and unnecessary behavior.

"Well for starters, it would be very disrespectful of me to not walk a woman back to her house at this hour of the night. And secondly..." he thought back to Twilight, though his mental image of her consisted of her with large red horns and a small straw doll of him with pins in it. He shuddered at the thought. "...secondly, I owe you for showing me the way to my house!" he lied, not wanting to tell her the real reason and ruin her perception of one of her best friends.

"I guess it's alright. If Twilight trusts you, I can trust you as well..." she said softly as she started walking towards her house again.

---------- ---------- ----------

It was a good ten minutes more, but after arriving, Fluttershy finally said her goodnights to Perry for the last time tonight. "Thank you very much, Perry. The story about the group of cute bunnies was adorable."

"Adorable to you...you weren't the one getting chased through the garden by a mob of angry rabbits," he laughed lightly, causing both of them to laugh. "Well, you have a good night. I am sure we will see each other later."

"You have a good night as well, and be safe walking home," she told him as she entered and closed the door. He nodded, though no one was there to see it, and started on his way back to the vacation house. The walk was uneventful and kind of boring now that there was no one to hear his tales. It didn't take him nearly as long now that he knew where he was going. He got to the door and walked inside after unlocking it. The place was a bit dusty with a few cobwebs here and there, but nothing a serious cleaning wouldn't fix. Even so, it was well furnished and more then ready to have a resident living there.

Deciding to finally crash for the night, the sugar rush from the cake wearing out quickly, he went into his new bedroom to get ready for bed. Searching throught the few boxes shipped over from the castle, he found the one with his sleepwear. He changed into the comfortable new clothes, a generally goofy looking pair of sleep pajamas, and laid down in his bed. For the final and most important touch, he took his mask off, replacing it with one that almost looked the same, but had closed eyes instead of the open ones and was made out of a softer, easier to sleep on material. He held the original mask up in front of him, just staring at it for a good ten minutes. Deep within its grinning gaze, he started to shake slightly. In almost an instant, he quickly chucked the mask at the wall, causing a small dent in the wall as the mask fell to the floor with a thud. Sighing slightly at this outburst, he quickly pulled the covers over his head and tried to catch some sleep. He couldn't put his finger on it, but something seriously bothered him, frustrating him to the point where he had felt all desire to sleep completely leave him. "It was simply going to be another sleepless night, I guess..."

Comments

[doctor_n]

place. It was a nice one floor cottage,

He went upstairs

...ummm

[light snow]

So are the animals in this equestria not sentient like the cows? Because I do to think they would be eating hot dogs then

[1st Lieutenant Dave]

2927482 Fuck logic

[Dragula]

SHH SHH SHH Doctor _n
He's Sheogoraths cousin, He could reverse the flow of water into bagel dancers