Weight of the Crown
Within the confines of the Department of Science and Research was a single room that lay at the end of an L-shaped hallway. Because it was the only room down that hallway, and it was out of sight, few ponies that worked there knew about this room. The ones that did found it was by accident, probably from getting lost, and believed that it was some supply closet or something of that nature.
However, these assumptions would be all wrong. The room was actually full of blacklist-level devices. Projects that were not mention on any official report and was requested by Princess Luna personally. She kept them a secret as an ace up her metaphorical sleeve, in case of an emergency. Like, for example, if one of her scientists decided to create a new weapon and planned to use it to take over the Lunar Republic, maybe more. Only two ponies have ever worked on these projects: Director Bunsen Burner and Assistant Director Twilight Sparkle.
Right now, Sunset was the first pony ever to experience the effects of one of these items. She had all four hooves restrained as her back lay against a smooth slab of metal. She had to be restrained and gagged, not just because she was a dangerous criminal, but because of the immense pain she was in. On her was something that looked like a metal bowl. When they had put it on, several needles that were inside of it had dug their way into her skin, skull, and finally her brain. The outside had several cables that connected the bowl to a computer.
Standing in front of the computer were two ponies. One was Princess Luna. After arresting Sunset, she had order her onto Crescent Hope under heavy guard, along with Twilight, Shadow, Scootaloo, and the rest of the ponies in her party. Once they arrived at the castle, Twilight took Scootaloo to get the treatment she needed. Meanwhile, Luna offered to have one of her guards show Celestia and Eagle Eyes around, while she dealt with the criminal unicorn.
Next to her, operating the computer, was a grey coated pegasus stallion with a long white beard and mane. He wore a lab coat, which covered up his cutie mark as well as his black rimmed glasses. He was Director Bunsen Burner, the inventor of the machine Sunset was currently hooked up to.
“How much longer?” asked Princess Luna.
Bunsen Burner didn’t answer right away. Instead, he used his wings to type a command into the computer, which turned off the device. He then turned to look at his princess with old, tired eyes.
“Maybe an hour or two,” he replied.
Luna raised an eyebrow. “That long?” she asked.
“This is a very complex procedure,” he said, turning back to the computer. “I have to go through a large amount of information before we can begin making the necessary changes.” He then paused for a moment. “If you have anything you want to say to her, you should do it now. You’ll never have another chance.”
For a moment, Luna hesitated. Was there anything she wanted to tell her? Right now, she was the most despised pony in the Republic. She was no Genetic Code, but she was close. Her own parents had washed their hooves of her. In her mind, there was nothing left to say.
Just as she was about to say no, she began to feel a twinge of pity for her. This would be the last time Luna would ever be able to talk to her. Maybe a message to somepony she cared about, like saying she was sorry. Even if nopony cared what she had to say, Luna thought it would be best to allow her this one last act of kindness. So, using her magic, Luna undid the gag and lifted it above her head.
“Sunset Shimmer, as you knows, you have been sentenced to Living Death,” began Luna as Sunset continued to lie there, panting. “Once we are done here, your body will be removed from the Republic, never to return. Is there anything you want to say while you still can?”
“…Yes,” said Sunset. “Please let me kill her! She ruined my life! I don’t care what happens to me afterwards, just-” Before she could finish, Luna shoved the gag back into her mouth before mentally scolding herself. It had been foolish to believe that Sunset could change, even in these last moments.
“Tell me when it is done, so that we can dispose of her quickly,” instructed Luna as she walked out the door. “I’ll be checking in on Twilight and her family.”
-x-
The waiting room of Healing Touch had never been so full. Twelve ponies sat there not talking, reading the large verity of magazines, or playing any of the foal’s games that were available. The television set was dark and silent as well. They all just sat there, waiting for some kind of news.
Twilight kept glancing at the door that led to the operating room every couple of minutes, as if she were trying to will Healing Touch to come out. She wanted, no, needed to know what was happening and if Scootaloo was going to be alright. She hated not knowing something and it was killing her right now. The only comfort she had right now was Shadow’s hoof that was resting on top of her own.
As Twilight turned to look at the door again, she noticed movement out of the corner of her eye. She turned her head and saw that somepony had just walked in from the entrance. It was Lightning Dust, still in her armor! And, she wasn’t alone. Behind her was a bunch of fillies and colts, including Dinky.
“Hey everypony,” she gently called out, while trying to be cheerful. “I hope you don’t mind. After what happened, I decided to let my Troopers know that Scootaloo was alright, and they wanted to see her.”
A small smile appeared on Twilight’s face. “Of course I don’t mind,” she said as she got out of her seat. “I’m sure she’ll be happy to see all of you.”
“I thought the kid would like it,” replied Lightning with a nod. “And we’ll all be here for her, no matter what happens. Right, Troopers?”
“Right!” they all cheered at once.
“I just hope she takes it well,” said Twilight as her worries reappeared. “She was just cured of her crossbreed syndrome and was finally learning how to fly. I don’t know how she’ll react to having one of her wings replaced with a cybernetic one.”
“That’s why we’re here,” announced a new voice. Walking through the door was Time Turner and Derpy. Derpy, the one who had spoken, ran over to hug Twilight. “We got here as soon as we could. I just wish there was something more we could do.”
Twilight hugged her back. “I think being here is enough for now.”
Once again, the door opened, to reveal Vinyl Scratch carrying a large boom box on her back. She looked around the door and smiled.
“Nice to see so many rockin’ faces here to support my number one favorite filly,” she said. “When she gets out, I’ll let loose the victory jams!”
At that moment, Twilight felt like crying. It wasn’t because she was sad. No, she was so happy that so many ponies came to see Scootaloo, even though they had only known her for a short amount of time. She opened her mouth to tell everypony there thanks for coming, when Healing Touch entered the room.
“So, this is the cause of the sudden noise,” she stated with a slight smile as Twilight and Shadow quickly approached her.
“How is she?” asked Twilight quickly.
“She seems to be doing alright,” said Healing, leaving Twilight to let out a sigh of relief. “We injected the nanomachines and they are busy repairing the damage to the wing. We’re also using magic to speed up the process by moving the bones into place. That way, all they have to do is connect the bones and she’ll be alright.”
The ponies from the Lunar Republic looked relieved to hear this news. However, those from Equestria just looked confused. They understood that Scootaloo was going to be alright and that was the important thing. But, how it was being done was confusing.
Rainbow opened her mouth to begin asking questions, but was interrupted when all of the lights in the office turned red and began to flash. At the same time, a female voice began to broadcasted, “Emergency! Dr. Healing Touch, please report to healing station one. Code Red.” As the voice began to repeat itself, all the color from Healing Touch’s face vanished.
“But, that’s impossible,” Healing whispered to herself. “She was fine when I left her.” The doctor took a quick breath before addressing everypony else in the room. “I need to go. Please wait here.”
“What’s going on?” demanded Twilight as her fears began to rise. However, Healing was already through the doors, which made a clicking sound as they closed. Twilight tried to follow her, but found the door locked. “Please, I can help! If you need more magic, I’ll give you all that I have! Just please!”
For what seemed like an eternity, Twilight continued to shout at the door while banging on it with her hoof. Fearful tears were running down her face as her mind began to spin out all sorts of possibilities. Was there some kind of complication? Had the nanomachines malfunctioned? Was Scootaloo…dead? The more these thoughts ran through her head, the harder she began to bang against the door while demanding answers.
Suddenly, she felt a hoof on her shoulder. She turned around and stared into the face of Shadow, tears rolling down his face as well. And he wasn’t alone. Nopony in the room was left unaffected by this news.
Fluttershy seemed to be sobbing just as hard as Twilight, while Rainbow Dash and Lightning Dust had turned away, so that nopony could see their tears. Rarity and Applejack were holding their sibling tightly. Even Trixie seemed saddened by this news as she took off her hat and began to stare at the ground. Upon seeing all of this, Twilight wrapped her hooves around Shadow’s neck and continued to sob.
Meanwhile, Luna stood outside of the office listening to everypony. When she had arrived, she had heard the doctor give the good news. But, as she was about to open the door, she heard the emergency message and froze.
As she heard Twilight’s cries, she took a step backwards. She wanted so much to go in there and see her student. To tell her that everything would be alright, that they had the best doctors looking after Scootaloo. Yet, for some reason, she couldn’t. She couldn’t face her student. Instead, Luna began to walk away with her head facing the ground.
Luna walked down the halls as if she were a zombie, thinking about the events that led up to Scootaloo’s injuries. While she didn’t place all the blame on herself, most of it went to Sunset, she did felt that she held some of the blame. In fact, if she had done things differently in the past, then none of this would have happened.
When was the last time she had messed up this badly? The answer came back to her instantly: Genetic Code. Both times she should have seen the signs that something bad would happen. She knew what their personalities were, and thus, should have expected something like this. The only comfort she had right now was that nopony was dead this time. From what she had heard, Blink would live, but it was still unclear if he could continue his job as a member of the Royal Guard.
But, that brought little comfort to her. Politically, it was a nightmare. A citizen of the Lunar Republic had foalnapped three fillies who were visiting from Equestria, while she had been talking to the leaders of two nations. She was sure that this would reflect poorly in their eyes. Then, there were her own citizens, whom she was sure were furious with her. They were probably wondering why she didn’t place Sunset in a prison pod in the first place.
Personally, on the other hoof, it was even worse. Twilight, the mare she saw as a daughter, was suffering. Luna knew that she couldn’t protect her from everything. Nopony could, it was simply impossible. However, she never wanted to be part of the reason that hurt her or her loved ones. She couldn’t bear walking into the waiting room and having Twilight blame her, even thought it was unlikely.
Minutes seemed like hours as Luna continued to walk without aim. It was only when she bumped into another that broke her out of her haze. Looking up, she saw that it was Emperor Eagle Eyes looking back at her. Luna then looked around and saw that she was now in a hallway, with windows looking out towards the lunar landscape.
“Emperor, I apologize,” said Luna quickly. “I was lost in thought and-”
“Think nothing of it,” he replied, politely waving her off. “I really shouldn’t be here. While on the tour, I saw these windows and snuck off. I know it was wrong, but I really wanted to see the moon’s surface up close.”
“I see,” acknowledged Luna. “Well, no harm done, I suppose. I will find your guide and inform him of where you are.”
As Luna began to walk away, Eagle Eyes spoke up once more. “Is everything alright?” he asked. Luna paused in mid-step before she turned to face him with a frown.
“Of course everything is alright,” she said, but judging on the look on his face, the griffon didn’t believe her. After a few moments under his gaze, Luna let out a sigh of defeat. “I…I messed up. I went easy on one of my previous students, which led to today’s events. And now a mare, who is like a daughter to me, is suffering.”
“I see,” responded Eagle after a moment. He then nodded before turning his attention about out the window. “We are more alike than I originally thought.”
Luna raised an eyebrow. “What makes you say that?” she asked. After all, they barely knew each other. It was a little soon for him to be making comments like that.
Eagle Eyes chuckled. “My tour guide gave us a brief history of the Lunar Republic, starting with why it was founded,” he began. “So, I know that Celestia is your older sister. See, I am also a second born.”
Luna’s eyes widened in shock. This was something she didn’t expect to hear. But, if that was true, then what had happened to his older brother? From what she could remember of the Empire’s politics, the first born almost always became the next Emperor. Was he dead, or did something else happen to him?
“You see,” continued Eagle Eyes, “I was never meant to take the crown. My father told me that at least once a week. It would go to my brother, Hawk Eyes. He always got the special attention. It…it was hard living under his shadow.
“And, what made it worse was that he knew how special he was, and flaunted it around. The way he lived was borderline dishonorable. Coming home drunk, having wild parties whenever our parents were away, and so on.
“One day, I finally had enough of it and went to talk to my father. When I got to his door, I heard him talking to my mother. They too seemed tired of Hawk’s actions. They were tired of making excuses for him, as well as his lack of attention to his studies.
“I heard my father wish that I had been born first, so he could make me the next Emperor. My mother asked why not, and he replied that Hawk hadn’t broken any laws or dishonored the family in any way that would permit him from taking away his birthright. I heard him say that a ruler whose choices which laws he will follow and which he won’t is one who will become a tyrant.
“I never spoke to them that night. Never even told them that I overheard them. Instead, I decided that I would help my country, so they would have less to worry about. I joined the military with the goal of becoming a general, so I could advice Hawk in military matters.
“Simply put, it was hard. My brother’s reputation had caused many of the recruits to think that I was just as spoiled as he was, and that I was here as some kind of punishment. But, I ignored them and worked hard. Eventually, I was promoted. I got married to a griffon I truly loved. And, I could tell my parents were happy for me.
“Then, one day, there was an accident. My brother foolishly decided to have a race besides an unstable cliff. Something happened and there was a landslide. Me, my father, and several other soldiers raced to help those who were trapped under the rocks. My brother just went home to take a bath.
“We returned to the palace three days later. Twenty griffons were dead. My father was furious, yelling at my brother for what seemed like hours. We could both see it on his face, Hawk didn’t care. He even asked why my father was making such a big deal about a few peasants dying. Before he could say anything else, my father collapsed due to a heart attack.”
Eagle then took a breath before he continued.
“He survived, but things were never the same after that. He couldn’t do all of his normal duties. He stopped trying to give Hawk his lessons. And, Hawk didn’t mind. He continued to spend his time like he had before, sometimes even going on long vacations and sending the bill to the palace. He didn’t even return when my mother died.”
Eagle took another, deeper breath.
“You don’t have to continue if it is too painful,” proposed Luna gently.
“I am almost done,” replied Eagle Eyes. “Then, about two months after my mom died, my father called me into his room. When I got there, I found him in his bed surrounded by high ranking officials, one of them being General Blaze Beak. As I made my way over to his bed, I saw that he was looking horrible. It was then that he told me he was dying, and that I was to become the new Emperor.
“As soon as he said that, I was full of doubt. I won’t lie, I had thought about how great it would be if I became Emperor, but now that it was happening, I…didn’t know what to feel. I guess mostly scared, since I didn’t know a thing about running a country. So I told my father that I was unworthy of such an honor, that there had to be another more suited. He looked at me, smiled, and said he felt the same way when his father died. That he knew that he was leaving the empire in good claws. And then, shortly after that, he passed away.
“Hawk, who was on one of his trips when my father passed, returned during my coronation. Needless to say, he was unhappy that I was named Emperor. As soon as he walked in, he ordered the guards to arrest me, yet seemed shocked when they didn’t obey him. The same guards and soldiers, who once mocked me during my training, were now loyal to me.
“When the event was over, General Blaze Beak wanted to know what was to happen to my brother. According to the law, his actions could be seen as treasonous. I knew I should have sent him to jail, or something like that, but I didn’t. We had just lost our father and he had just lost his birthright.
“And, despite knowing what kind of griffon he was, I thought it would be better for him to get a taste of the real world. So, I banished him from the Talon Palace for one year, with only a small bag of gold to get him by. My hope was that, when he returned, he would have seen the errors of his ways.
“Then, a few months later, I found out how he spent the gold. It was during the night and my daughter had just hatched. She began to cry, and I told my wife I would handle it, since she had been up three nights in a row. I…when I got back, I saw another figure standing above her. He…she wasn’t moving. The blankets were r-red. I-”
Eagle Eyes stopped there as the tears began to flow down his cheeks. Luna moved closely and began to hold him, with tears in her eyes as well. She felt his pain almost as if it were her own. Maybe it was because that he was right, they were similar. But, they were also different.
After a few minutes, he calmed down. “My guards were on the scene and caught the assassin. After torturing him for a bit, he revealed that my brother had paid him to kill the entire royal family. I ordered his arrest and immediate death, but he had already left the country.”
Eagle Eyes then left Luna’s embrace and looked at her directly in the eyes. “I tell you this because I know what you are feeling. I still blame myself for my wife’s death. Had I imprisoned him or left him with nothing, maybe she would still be alive.
“And, every time my daughter asks where her mommy is, I am afraid to tell her the truth, for fear that she’ll blame me as well. But, this is the truth I have learned: no ruler can make the right call every time. We’ll make mistakes and they’ll cast us. The important thing is to learn from them as to not repeat them.”
For a few seconds, Luna said nothing. “Do you ever plan on telling your daughter?” she asked.
Eagle nodded. “She’ll find out, sooner or later,” he said. “And, I’d rather her hear it from me than a stranger. And, regardless of how she sees me after that, I will stay by her.”
Luna regarded him for a moment. Then, much to Eagle’s surprise, she leaned in and gently kissed him on the cheek, causing his face to turn red.
“Thank you,” said Luna as she pulled back. “I must go now, before I make another mistake, one that will truly cost me if the worst happens.” With that, Luna began to walk away. Yet, as she did, Eagle Eye’s remained where he stood, as if he had been turned to stone. Then, slowly, he brought a claw up to the place where she had kissed.
“I’m never washing this cheek again,” he said.
-x-
Meanwhile, back in the hospital wing, Twilight and the others were being brought to health station one. There, they found a bed with Scootaloo laying on it with a tired smile on her face. Seeing her, Twilight raced over and hugged her. As she did, all the other ponies noticed that Scootaloo’s wing looked almost good as new. However, they also noticed the large scar on her side.
“Hey everypony,” said Scootaloo sleepily, seeing several ponies surround her bed.
“I’m sorry for that scare earlier,” said Healing Touch from off to the side. “We had assumed that Sunset had used a standard magical blast when she shot Scootaloo. But, when it got worse, when we tried to heal it, we realized that it was caused by Razor Shard.”
“Trixie has never heard of this spell,” said Celestia’s student.
“It’s like a curse,” muttered Vinyl as she took off her glasses to reveal her red eyes. “Me and Twilight learned about it in school. Nasty spell. The spell is like a sword wound that gets worse every couple of minutes. If somepony tries to heal it with magic, then it just opens up even faster.”
“How awful,” exclaimed Fluttershy.
“Indeed,” announced a new voice. Everypony turned to see Princess Luna as she walked into the room. Before any of them could bow, she raised a hoof to stop them. “There is no need for that. Not here.”
“Thank you for coming, Princess,” said Twilight as she continued to hug Scootaloo.
“I’m sorry it took me so long,” replied Luna before she turned to look at Healing Touch. “Was Razor Shard the reason for the emergency?”
“Yes,” replied the doctor. “When we tried to heal it, she almost bled out. Right now, we are using a spell to increase her blood count and, when that is done, we will do our best to remove the scar. But,she’ll need to be kept here for the next day or two. I also would like to recommend that she receives counseling to make sure there are no long term psychological effects.”
Luna nodded at Dr. Healing before making her way to the head of the bed. She then looked down on Scootaloo and smiled. “What you did back there was very brave,” she said. “As such, I believe that it merits a reward.”
“Do I get to join the Royal Guard when I’m older?” asked Scootaloo sleepily.
Luna chuckled. “I’m afraid not,” she said. “You still have to work hard at it, just like every other pony who wants to join. Instead, I’ll have it arranged so that you can enter my school next semester.”
“But, Princess, she still has a lot of ground to cover,” noted Twilight.
“Don’t worry,” replied Luna. “I’ll work something out with Bunsen Burner, so that you can work from home until then. That should help a bit. And, if you need an extra hoof, I’d be glad to help her with her studies when you do have to go to the labs.”
“T-thank you, Princess,” stammered Twilight.
Luna smiled as her horn began to glow. “Now, I think it’s time somepony got some sleep.” Gently, Luna brought her horn down to tap Scootaloo’s head. The filly’s eyes closed, drifting off to sleep where she would have pleasant dreams.
Once that was done, Luna turned to look at the rest of them. “Now then, I had arranged for those visiting to stay at one of the finest hotels in Dome One. However, in light of current event, you will instead be staying here in the castle. I will have your suites ready by tonight. I will also have your old room ready as well, Twilight.”
Twilight opened her mouth to protest, but closed it. Staying here in the castle would allow her to be closer to Scootaloo, which was most likely Princess Luna’s intention. So, instead she nodded.
-x-
It was about an hour later when a golden flash of light appeared in Celestia room. The sun princess had a look on horror in her eyes, looking at the body suspended in her magic. Slowly, she laid the body on her bed before taking a step back. In every way, it looked like Sunset Shimmer, except for one thing: her cutie mark was missing.
But, that wasn’t the only difference with her. No, the truth was that what Luna had done to her ran much deeper. Celestia had a hard road ahead of her, more than ever now. At least, she was still alive.
Just then, a soft moan escaped the mare’s mouth as she opened her eyes. Slowly, she looked around, looking a little confused. Her head stopped when she spotted Celestia.
“Where am I?” she asked. “And, who are you?”
“I am Princess Celestia,” was the reply. “And you are in my castle in Equestria. Tell me, what do you remember?”
“Remember?” repeated the mare as she closed her eyes. For a few minutes she sat there, as she held her eyes closed tightly, as if she were searching for something. Then, when they opened, Celestia could see pure terror in her eyes.
“Nothing! I don’t remember anything. Who am I? Where did I come from?”
Celestia looked upon Sunset with pity. Living Death: a process that deleted almost all of her memories. She still retained some of her knowledge, like talking, writing, and basic math. However, the more advanced stuffs, as well as all of her time in the Lunar Republic, were gone forever.
“Your name is Sunset Shimmer,” replied Celestia. “There was an incident. I’m afraid your memories are gone forever.”
“B-but, what will happen to me?” asked Sunset as tears began to roll down her eyes. In answer to this, Celestia’s horn began to glow like the morning sun.
“Don’t worry, my little pony,” said Celestia. “I’ll help you start over.”
-x-
“By the stars,” swore a pegasus who was sitting in front of a computer. “It’s doing it again!”
“Is something wrong?” asked Senator April Showing as she walked towards the other pegasus.
“Yeah,” he replied without turning to look at his boss. “The new system that those research ponies whipped up isn’t working so well with our old equipment. It keeps glitching, and I can’t get any water to Dome Eleven because of it. It’s getting to the point where I’m pulling the hair out of my mane.”
“Have you contacted any of the IT ponies?” asked April.
“Yes,” grunted the pegasus. “And, then it works ok for a while, before it becomes screwed up again.”
April let out a sigh. “Alright then, I’ll get somepony to come and look at it.”
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So living death is... format her mental hard drive and start over.
So, when do we get to the part when the Mane Six wake up?
Please don't misunderstand; I like your work very much. But it just feels like it's... dragging. None of the conflicts are overly tense and no result is overly surprising. You started the work by pretty much telling us that none of this is actually happening, nor will it, and I'm really very interested to hear what the canon Mane Six think about what they're seeing and experiencing within the context of this "dream".
I remember the Death of Personality from babylon five could be reversed, and how horrified the new personality was towards the action of the old one. If Celestia (or anyone for that matter) thinks it's a good idea to restore the old personality...
Looks like I'm the first one to comment
Thanks for the new chapter. I liked it, not a whole lot happened but it was a nice closer to Sunset's arc and we did get some character development from Luna and Eagle Eyes.
That being said, this chapter could use another pass through an editor or even spell-check.
The ones that did found it was by accident, probably from getting lost, and believed that it was some supply closet or something of that nature
This would be better as "The ones that did find it only found it by accident..."
Projects that were not mention on any official report
That should be "mentioned"
reading the large verity of magazines
The word you're looking for is 'variety'.
The sun princess had a look on horror in her eyes
That should be "of". "...a look of horror in her eyes."
Nothing that ruins the story, but a few little things that are rather irksome.
Finally, as a huge RD fan I will defend her lack of knowledge of the WB's in Testing One, Two, Three.
The WB's have a huge history of nearly 2,000 years. To an athlete like RD that's ancient history and has nothing to do with the present. It's likely she could have named the full roster of the WB's for the past 10-20 years backwards and forwards, along with the strengths, weaknesses and favorite techniques of each member but anything beyond that is "egghead" stuff.
Sorry, I kind of screwed up the quotes there.
That'll teach me not to add without previewing.
4282277 I predict that Sunset Shimmer will eventually go back to being a bad pony on her own accord. It is my belief there is more to personality than just memory. Call it what you will, a soul perhaps, but despite my mostly positive view of humanity I believe there also exists individuals who are inherently evil. Celestia will teach her, make her strong, and then Sunset will fit into this universe as she did the original one. This Celestia never had to deal with banishing her sister, this Celestia is too kind. Even Fluttershy would be angry at Sunset in this situation.
4282265
To be honest, the first chapter is entirely superfluous. I would have absolutely no problems in removing that entire chapter and labeling it a complete AU. While a part of me does wonder what the Mane Six will think of how history have played out in the alternate universe dream thingy, I think this story would work better without it.
Moving on, I pray that you, Darthvalgaav, will not go with the overused "bad guy who lost his memories regained them" cliche, and have Sunset Shimmer remain a background pony, or better yet, become a good pony. It would be a twist that would actually be surprising. Because at this moment, it is very probably that nearly all the readers are probably predicting that she will regain her memories and will probably work with the anti-Luna conspiracy to bring down Twilight.
4282364
Eh heh heh...actually, it did went through an editor and a spell checker. But, as good as an editor as I am, I am not perfect (and, unfortunately it seems, neither is Word). There will be a few things that I might have missed, or a few things that I might not sure how to correct, so I just do the best that I can do and trust the readers to help out. Speaking of which, thank for pointing them out. Hopefully, the author will correct everything.
> To be fair, I was a little iffy with the original version and wasn’t sure the best way to changed it. So, I did my best and just left it up for someone to catch.
> Eh, honestly, I was thinking the same as well. But, for some odd reason, Word was telling me that it was incorrect. I know that Word isn’t always reliable, and I really should have changed it when I caught it the first time, but grammar can be a wacky thing at time and Word had me doubting my own thought on this error.
> You want to know the odd and sad thing about this error...I did caught that bloody stupid mistake and I thought that I had corrected it. I just don’t know how it found its way back in...
> This one is just a simple, honest miss. Thank for catching it.
4282511
Honestly, I believe it's more that superfluous, it's misleading. This story is not about the 'real' Mane Six coping with 'what ifs', but rather the 'what ifs' themselves - hence, it is a genuine AU story.
4282446 the phase i think your looking for is 'Instinct of Darkness' but normal that can only reveal itself when 1. Your/or loved ones life is in mortal danger or 2. You find the 'Happy' center, then your new 'Light' and old 'Darkness' conflict leading you to Destructive Insanity. < I really hope this happens to her!
The body may be alive, but "Sunset Shimmer" is pretty much death. The pony Celestia pretends to raise is SS merely in looks and name.
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Whereas for me, that chapter is why I continue reading. I like having the mental escape hatch of "none of this is real".
Naw... she's become the deus ex machina! I'm totally serious... I think that Sunset Shimmer is now a goddess in the machine that they used to take her memories. I think that she'll end up destroying all that the Republic has built.
I hope so.
I admire and love what the author's done with this work but I'm slowly getting tired of my favorite among the three princesses (although it's a really, really, really close call because Cadance is best former-foalsitter-turned-royal) being the ruler of an empire that's riding the bleeding edge of technology but seems to have totally lost its soul.
Which is why, as I stated in a previous chapter, I really wanted to see Sunset Shimmer win. It would be the first time it felt like a truly monumental and important thing occurred, and it'd be the first time (in my opinion, mind) that it felt like the what was being called a serious matter by the story was actually genuinely serious.
4282277 wrote : "I remember the Death of Personality from babylon five could be reversed, and how horrified the new personality was towards the action of the old one. If Celestia (or anyone for that matter) thinks it's a good idea to restore the old personality...
"
Actually on Babylon 5 the old personality was never restored. What happened was he was forced to experience snippets of memory from his old life. This was done by someone who wanted revenge on the old personality, but since it was gone settled for tormenting the "new guy".
Wait... We are now facing an AI villain now? OR... Did Discord's claw give some kind of virus in the system.
Oh wow blank memory and flank Sunset Shimmer in Equestria under the guidance of Tia. This should be interesting. Maybe she will join the CMC!
DAMMIT TIA, Why can't you learn the leave things the fuck alone.
Nice chapter. I liked how The griffion king told his story and how is crush for Luna is growing. I can't wait for the next chapter. Best of luck.
4283144 Yea at this rate, the gryphon princess is gonna have a powerful baby hippgryph brother. :P
4283263 I never thought about it but yeah. THat is the baby of an alicorn and a grphyon. I am still wondering though when will shinning see Cadence again. I think that will help solve his overbearing brother issue completely. Though that would make quite the stir in both empires.
What happened to the parasprite plot thread?
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Next chapter
One that would help Sunset build a new life is a guard whom she would bump into, Flash Sentry.
Just finished this chapter and loved it. However, does anyone else here think that Celestia was using an age spell when she said she would help Sunset start over?
oh no... no no no! not that... she didn't do what i think she did, did she...? did she download her brain into the mainframe?
... aww shock...
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Lunar Republic, meet your new goddess:
derpicdn.net/img/2013/5/21/330234/full.png
"What's the matter Twilight? Don't you like my new look?"
Nice this is a great chapter.
I know what you were talking about from Stargate Atlantice.
Nice use by the way.
Thanks for writing it.
Mane 6 Comments:
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*from out of nowhere Brony-wan-Kenobi slowly approaches the mane six* Hello there girls. I couldn't help but overhear your conversation. Very sorry about that. I was just wondering what you thought about that spell Celestia used at the end there. See, I believe that Celestia is using an age spell so that Sunset can better fit into her new life since she has no memories and only basic skills. What do you think?
I hope the lunar republic is able to flash burn the parasprites once they realize they have an infestation.
Otherwise they are going to have to trade tech with the Gryphons to get their food stuffs back in order.
also it would be all Celestia's fault for sending an animal obsessed pony onto a lunar space station with limited supplies, right after she finds the newest cute animal to take along..
please update soon.
I really really really hope that updates pick up for this story again.
I hope this story is alive.
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It is, just waiting on my proofreader
I know that! Secret of My Excess reference!
So, what's happened to the Canon Mane Six?
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Did the author not explain that in one of his announcements at the end of one of the older chapters.
Christ, this chapter was a trainwreck. Between absurdly cruel and absurdly apathetic, there is literally nobody in this chapter who doesn't look either revoltingly incompetent, just plain revolting or both. I am continually amazed how this story manages to get things working so right in one moment and then completely screws it up again in the next. The worst part is that there isn't even the slightest indication that this is how we are supposed to look at the characters or that the author is even aware of what they're doing. The sheer and jarring inconsistency of it makes it almost ludicrous.
Wow, I was expecting Living Death to be something horrible, but that's actually an excellent alternative to the death penalty. In a way that's actually merciful because the pony forgets everything that caused them to go bad in the first place and then they can be happy and not be evil anymore. I hope the human race figures out how to do that and replaces the death penalty with that.
Speaking of which, you forgot to reveal what Operation Umbrella is.
I remember that from SgA!
Oh wow there is some really interesting stuff here.
Also, am I the only one who thinks that Blueblood's assassin Griffon is actually the disposed brother?
This crush is so great!
That damn critter is messing up things
*shudders*
Lobotomy makes my skin crawl.
Same as in Dishonored 2. I can never let Jindosh live, because honestly the nonlethal alternative is... far worse.