Twilight walked out of the platform station with Scootaloo in tow, along with several other ponies. The purple mare had some light bags under her eyes from staying up most of the night, only getting in a quick nap. The young filly’s saddle bags contained several books to study.
Twilight hadn’t wanted to take the young pegasus to work with her, but there was no other option. Originally, Derpy had volunteered to foalsit Scootaloo, as well as her own daughter. However, due to the situation going on at the castle, she had to go to work. In fact, nearly everypony who worked there was going to work. This was most likely due to Princess Luna leaving in the middle of the night.
Twilight could only imagine how scared and confused everypony was right now. Rumors had already begun to circulate. Some said that Princess Luna had gone down to the planet to fight Celestia, while others said she was trying to take what the Republic needed. Twilight had also heard, from some of the royal guards, no less, that Gigawatt was trying to get the other Senators to go to war.
Luckily, Senator Land Share held firm to the letter of the law saying that only Princess Luna can issue a war vote. The only exceptions to this were if she had been captured or incapacitated. Without proof of either, they could not proceed.
While this was good news for Twilight, she was still worried. She had no idea what her Princess was doing right now. Nor did she have any idea what was going to happen next. It was like there was an error in their computer systems that was causing everything to go wacky, that would eventually led to something horrible.
“Ah, Mom,” said Scootaloo behind her. When Twilight heard this, her eyes widened with some confusion. Did Scootaloo just call her Mom? Quickly, she turned her head to look at the filly.
“Did you just call me Mom?” she asked. There was no anger in her voice or anything to suggest that she was upset. Just a little confused.
“Y-Yeah,” stammered Scootaloo. “Is it ok if I call you that?”
“Yes, of course it is,” said Twilight with a smile. “It’s just that I’m surprised that you started to call me that so soon.”
“Oh,” said Scootaloo as she scratched the back of her head while looked a little embarrassed. “Well, last night Midnight called you my mom and it felt really good. Back in Equestria, I always imagined what it would be like to have a mom. She’d be able to help me with my homework, cook amazing meals, and be awesome! And that’s what you’ve been so far.”
For a moment, Twilight didn’t say or do anything. She just stood there with her head lowered. As time passed, Scootaloo began to wonder what was going on. Twilight had said that calling her mom was ok, didn’t she?
Before Scootaloo could ask what was wrong, Twilight raised her head to show the filly the tears running down her smiling face. Then, Twilight quickly wrapped Scootaloo in a big hug.
‘If only Mom and Dad could have met you,’ thought Twilight.
Scootaloo, at first, was a bit uncomfortable with the hug. It was, well, too cheesy for her tastes. But, after a few moments, she began to feel the same warmth that she felt last night. It was coming from inside her.
It was a warmth that told her that this was alright. That everything would be ok. And, Scootaloo began to wonder if this was what a mother’s love felt like. And, if it was, then she liked it.
-x-
Meanwhile, in Equestria, Applejack was heading to her family’s farm as fast as she could. It was only several minutes ago when their flying chariot had landed in Ponyville, but it wasn’t going anywhere for at least another hour. That was how long she had to get packed for a very important trip.
After seeing Princess Cadence off, the farming mare thought that she and her friends would be heading straight home. Instead, waiting in front of their ride home was none other than Princess Celestia. To their surprise, she announced that they would be the first ponies from Equestria to visit the Lunar Republic. Not only that, they were leaving today!
Applejack, Fluttershy, and (to everypony’s surprise) Rarity stated that they couldn’t go. According to Rarity, she had a mountain of orders she had to finish and that this trip had already put her far behind. Applejack said that she had been away from the farm long enough, and that she had to get back to work. Finally, Fluttershy informed the princess that she had to take care of her animal friends. Before she had left, she made sure that they had plenty of food for a couple of days. Any longer and they might go hungry.
Rather than being put off, Princess Celestia promised them that everything would be taken care of. She would have one of the royal dressmakers take care of Rarity’s shop, the royal grounds keeper look after Fluttershy’s cottage, and have several guards help out at Applejack’s farm. She was also going to let them head home to pack and say their goodbyes.
So, there Applejack was, heading back to her house as fast as her four legs could carry her. When she saw the front door, she came to a screeching halt. As she prepared to open the door, her ears stood up as she heard two ponies laughing inside. One of them was Apple Bloom, but she had no idea who the other was. It sounded like another mare.
When Applejack opened the door, the laughing stopped. She turned her head to look into the kitchen to see her sister and the other pony covered in flour. On the kitchen table were several pie tins.
“Howdy, sis,” said a happy Apple Bloom as the other mare took a few steps back. “We all thought ya’d never get home. What took ya?”
“I’m sorry, Apple Bloom,” replied Applejack. “Things kind of got a bit complicated. Ah wish ah could stay and tell ya more, but ah got ta get going soon.”
Apple Bloom opened her mouth to ask why, but at that moment Granny Smith walked into the room. The elderly mare surveyed the kitchen with her ancient eyes for a moment, taking in the mess and the lack of pies in the oven.
“Hurry up, ya silly fillies,” said Granny. “We got ta make at least a dozen apple pies before noon. Now shake ya caboose, Apple Bloom. Ya too, Zecora.”
At the mention of that name, several ponies in the room had different reactions. Applejack’s eyes went wide when she realized that the flour-covered mare was the evil enchantress of the Everfree Forest. Apple Bloom looked surprised and confused as her sisters eyes narrowed at her new friend. Zecora simply facehoofed.
“What in tarnation is she doing here?!” demanded Applejack. Then, to her great surprise, both Apple Bloom and Granny Smith moved so that they were in-between them. “What’s goin on with ya two? Don’t ya know who that is?”
“Applejack,” said Granny Smith in her best nagging voice. “Is that how we treat a guest of the Apple family? No siree!”
“There’s nothing to worry about sis,” said Apple Bloom. “Zecora is a nice pony.”
“Nothin’ to worry about?!” yelled Applejack. “Don’t ya all know what ponies say about her?!”
Zecora let out a sigh. “I did not mean for my presence to cause a feud. Please listen to my story before you brood.”
Applejack looked at Zecora for a moment before looking at her family. Granny Smith was giving her a disappointed glare, the same one she always gave her whenever she messed up. Apple Bloom, on the other hoof, was giving her an innocent pleading look. Snorting in frustration, Applejack sat her plot on the ground. She would listen to Zecora and that was all she could promise at this point.
-x-
“Ok,” said Twilight after their hug ended and she wiped away her tears. “W-We’d better get going or else I’ll be late for work.”
“Do you think we can visit Shadow first?” asked Scootaloo. “I’d like to see where the Royal Guard trains!”
Twilight thought about this for a moment. The training grounds were along the way, so it wouldn’t take up too much of their time. Also, she wanted to see how Shadow was doing. Twilight knew he could take care of himself and all, but with everything that was going on, seeing him would be a big relief.
Of course, Twilight knew the most likely reason why Scootaloo wanted to see the training grounds. Last time she was in Scootaloo’s room, she had noticed one of the pamphlets the pegasus had brought back from the programming office had been taped to the wall. It was one for the royal guard.
“Well, now that I think about it,” said Twilight as she scratched her chin with her hoof. “I believe the Department of Research and Development is revealing a new fighter jet today. Might as well take a look.”
Scootaloo let out a cheer as the two hurried over to the training fields. But, when they got there, the two were greeted by an odd sight. Usually the field would be full of ponies in various forms of simulated combat, weapons training, or doing exercises. Instead, they saw that everypony was crowded up in the middle while looking up at the sky. Slowly, the two walked over to Lightning Dust, who continued to stare at the sky above without even noticing that they were standing next to her.
Finally, the two looked up to see what the big deal was. When Scootaloo saw it, her jaw dropped. It was a craft that moved faster than anything Scootaloo had ever seen before. It was almost half the size of her old school in Equestria with long silver wings. Whoever was piloting it was doing some impressive stunt work, like barrel rolls and the like.
Then, from underneath its wings, it fired six objects towards the opposite side of the grounds where nopony was. When they hit the ground, they erupted in a huge ball of fire. Moments later, the dirt that was shot up into the air began to fall on the crowd. Luckily for them, Twilight saw this and reacted by creating a magical barrier to protect them.
Just then, the fighter jet began to hover in the air, before it slowly began to lower itself to the ground. As it got closer, Scootaloo noticed a pair of strong metal legs that looked a bit like a chickens coming out of the fighter near the back. Also, two more smaller objects that looked like cylinders come out near the front. Once it landed, the fighter walked over to an area that had target dummies. From the cylinders came red laser blasts that shot holes right through all of the targets.
As all of the Royal Guard, as well as Scootaloo, began to cheer, the filly realized something. Sure, the legs did remind her of a chicken. A chicken of pure metal awesomeness!
There was, however, one pony who was not impressed. ‘That is what all those bits went into,’ thought Twilight with a frown. ‘What’s next, a high tech suit of armor?’
“Ok everypony,” came Shadow’s voice. The young filly moved to the outer edge of the crowd to see Shadow Blade standing in front of them in his armor. “This concludes the field test of the latest addition: the Windigo! Now let’s hear it for the inventor of this fine machine, as well as the pilot, Poindexter!”
The hatch on the Windigo opened up to reveal the nerdiest looking stallion Scootaloo had ever seen. He was a white earth pony with a slicked back brown mane wearing a green bowtie and thick glasses. As he tried to get out of the metal awesomeness, the stallion tripped and landed on his head. In this position, Scootaloo could see that his cutie mark was some kind of robotic figure.
Poindexter then rolled onto his back. “I-I’m ok,” he said as he touched his head with one of his front hooves. “Just feeling a little…dizzy.”
“Private Silent Strike,” yelled Shadow. A moment later, one of the unicorn guards appeared next to him. “Take him to the medical wing.” The unicorn saluted his commanding officer before picking up the fallen scientist and taking him to see a doctor.
“The rest of you, I want to see you all sparing.” This received a collective groan. “I know you all want to try the latest toy, but you will have to wait. Now, if I catch any of you paying more attention to the Windigo, then you will be giving me fifteen laps in the gravity hall. And it’ll be set to three times normal gravity.”
As soon as he finished speaking, all of the guards raced to begin their training while Shadow let out a little laugh. Once they were all on their way, Shadow notice his fiancé along with Scootaloo.
“That thing is awesome,” said Scootaloo, racing over to Shadow.
“It is, isn’t it?” replied Shadow.
“I guess,” said a slightly unimpressed Twilight. “I just don’t see why it needs legs.” This earned her a stare from the two.
“Well,” began Shadow. “Poindexter is a fan of those old cartoons. You know, the ones with the colts who piloted those giant mechs? Can’t remember what it was called. But, anyways, he’s always wanted to make one and the Windigo is the first prototype.”
“But, we have tanks that can fire laser cannons that can fire six times the energy that that thing does,” replied Twilight. “I will admit that it can only fire one blast at a time and then takes six seconds to recharge, while the Windigo can fire multiple energy blasts without needing to recharge, but that’s its only improvement. Also, the hover tanks are far more maneuverable on land.”
“Sometimes, you just have to go for style points,” said a voice behind the purple mare, causing her to jump. When she landed, Twilight turned around to see Land Share’s smiling face. “Trust me, Twilight, some ponies just prefer things like that.”
“What brings you out here, Uncle Land Share?” asked Twilight as she hugged the old stallion.
“Just doing a favor for the princess,” he replied. “The senate just got out of a meeting with the princess.”
“She’s back?” asked a relieved Twilight.
Land Share nodded. “Yes and she wants to see you,” he said. “Since Derpy is busy right now, I volunteered to get you. This works out pretty well for me, since I also needed to talk to you. I wanted to invite you to lunch at my place. You know, to celebrate your adoption and upcoming wedding.”
“I’d love to go,” said Twilight with a smile. “It’s been so long since we had shared a meal.”
“Good, but I think there might be some company,” noted Land Share with an odd look on his face. “Anyways, we’d better get going.”
Before Twilight took a step, she realized that she forgot about Scootaloo. A meeting with the princess might take a while and were usually private. She couldn’t leave Scootaloo sitting outside the door for an unknown amount of time. Luckily for her, Shadow realized the situation and had already come up with a solution.
“Why don’t you leave Scootaloo here with me,” said the bat pony. “While you’re with the princess, we can get some flying in.”
The orange filly’s wings buzzed with excitement. “That sound awesome,” she said happily. “Can I, Mom?”
When Shadow heard this, he looked at Twilight with a raised eyebrow. He felt that it was a little fast for Scootaloo to be calling her that. But, when he saw the happiness in Twilight’s eyes, it no longer mattered.
“I suppose so,” said Twilight. “It’ll give the two of you some future father-daughter bonding time.”
“Well then, now that that’s settled,” said Land Share as he got eveypony’s attention. “We really have to get going. I also have to inform you, Twilight, on just what is going on.”
-x-
“Now Apple Bloom, I want ya ta promise me that ya’ll be careful while Ah’m away,” said Applejack as she and her sister made their way to where the chariot was.
“Ah will,” said Apple Bloom for the thousandth time. “Geez, ya said you were fine with Zecora staying with us.”
This was true, to a point. She had, as promised, listened to Zecora’s story, believing that nothing the zebra said would change her mind. At first, she was right. She could understand why the good ponies of Ponyville would believe that Zecora would do something like that.
But, as the story continued, Applejack began to think back to the events of the last couple days. She remembered how she treated Shadow with fear and mistrust, because of what other ponies said about bat ponies. Then, she thought about Twilight, who was from the Lunar Republic. If she had told the farmer mare where she really was from, then Applejack knew she would have treated Twilight like a monster. Now that she knew the full truth, she didn’t blame either one of them for being upset with her and Equestria.
Then, her thoughts turned towards Zecora. The simple truth was that all she knew about her was from the rumors. She had never seen her do anything wrong nor do anything that could suggest that she had evil intensions. In fact, this was the first time the two of them had really spoken to each other.
As she looked the zebra over, Applejack noted the wounds she received. Zecora paused before talking about how she got them. She looked at Apple Bloom before saying that she got hurt, and then moving on. This gesture didn’t go unnoticed by either Applejack or Granny Smith. Zecora didn’t want Apple Bloom to hear the details of what she went through.
When the story was done, Applejack didn’t know what to think. On one hoof, she still felt there was something off about Zecora. Maybe it was because she talked weird or looked weird, or whatever. On the other hoof, the rest of her family let her stay at the farm. And, if they were willing to give her a chance, then maybe Applejack should too.
But, that didn’t mean she wanted her little sister to let her guard down.
“Ah just worry about ya sometimes,” said Applejack as they got close to the meeting spot. Looking dead ahead, Applejack could see everypony was there, except Rainbow Dash. Pinkie Pie was there with balloons tied to her waist. Fluttershy was there with her animal friends as she said goodbye to each and every one of them. And Rarity was dressed in some fancy blue dress, observing ahead toward another little filly that was putting her bags in the chariot.
“Sis, could you please lend a hoof?” asked the filly.
“And get this dress dirty?!” gasped Rarity. “Never! We are going to be representing not just Ponyville, but all of Equestria, so we simply must look our best.”
“Well, why don’t ya help Sweetie Belle out with your magic?” asked Apple Bloom.
“Well,” said Rarity slowly. “I guess that won’t be too much work. Don’t want to get a stain on this dress, after all.” She then sighed. “Very well, then.” With that, all of her seventeen bags were lifted into the air before being neatly placed in the chariot. While this situation was taken care of, a new problem was noticed by everypony, except Rarity.
“Great, now where do ya suppose the rest of us are goin’ sit?” asked Applejack.
“Well, it’s not my fault that-” began Rarity before Rainbow Dash crashed into her. The two ponies rolled around in the dirt for a few seconds before stopping in a muddy puddle. “MY DRESS! Rainbow Dash, I know you are used to-”
“Sorry,” interrupted Rainbow, getting to her hooves. “But, I just found out something big! Did any of you hear that Scootaloo has gone missing?” A few of the ponies nodded their heads. “Well, it turns out she’s in the Republic!”
-x-
“Come in,” said Princess Luna after hearing somepony knocking on the door to her private chambers. The door opened, revealing Twilight Sparkle. The Moon Princess smiled as her student walked in. “Good morning, Twilight. I take it you heard about what’s going on?”
“Yes,” replied the purple unicorn. “Land Share told me about the alliance.”
“And?” asked Luna.
“I think it better than merging with Equestria,” answered Twilight honestly. “Not only will we get what we need, but we will also keep our independence. Plus, over time, Equestria will see us for what we really are. But, by allowing ponies from Equestria into the Republic, we run the risk of them attacking us.”
“Senator Gigawatt said the same thing,” replied the princess. “Steps are already being taken to ensure that something like that doesn’t happen. Now then, do you know why I wanted to see you?”
“Uh, no actually,” replied Twilight.
“I called you here because I have an important mission for you,” said Luna. “Later today, Equestria will be sending their representatives to the Republic. I want you to show them around.”
“But, why me?” asked Twilight. “I mean, sure, I was down there for a while with Shadow, but surely there are ponies better qualified for something like this?”
Luna let out a soft sigh. ‘It’s now or never,’ she thought to herself.
“Twilight, what I’m about to tell you is something that my sister doesn’t want me to,” said Luna. “But, I’m going to anyways, because I believe you are ready to hear it.” Twilight’s eyes widened when she heard this. All kinds of possibilities raced through her head as she tried to figure out what it could be.
“Long ago,” began Luna, “my sister and I used several powerful artifacts, known as the Elements of Harmony, to fight the most powerful evil forces on the planet. The Elements were capable of doing what normal magic couldn’t. However, not just any pony could use them. Only ponies who represented each of the six Elements could use them. The Elements are Laughter, Honesty, Kindness, Generosity, Loyalty, and Magic. But, when I left Equestria, the connection we had to the Elements vanished.
“Over time, the Elements reached out to various ponies. Some had a strong link, while other had a weaker one. Sometimes, a few Elements found ponies that could be a bearer for their power, while at other times they couldn’t find any. It was only until a few years ago that all the Elements found ponies suitable to be new bearers.
“In Equestria, there are five. But, the sixth was born here in the Republic. And that is you, Twilight Sparkle.”
When Twilight heard that, her jaw dropped. How could that be true? She was no different from any other pony in the Republic. Ok, maybe she was a bit more knowledgeable than the average citizen. But, other than that, there was nothing that she felt made her worthy to be connected to such an amazing source of power.
“I don’t believe this,” said a shocked Twilight. Then, she looked up at Princess Luna. “How long have you known?”
“I knew you were a bearer the day your parents died,” replied Luna as she lowered her head.
Now, a new emotion entered Twilight: Rage. Princess Luna, the pony she trusted more than any other, had been keeping something like this a secret from her for years. She said that Princess Celestia told Luna not to tell her about this. Well, she didn’t have a problem with that before!
“Then, why didn’t you tell me?” demanded Twilight. “Why were you keeping this from me?!”
“Because, you had already been through enough,” replied Luna, which caught Twilight off guard. “You had just lost two of the most important ponies in your life. Reporters wanted to talk to you, wanting to talk to you about what happened in that cave-in. At the time, I thought that the connection you had with the Element was a temporary one. That you had instinctively called out to it with your magic in order to survive. So, I kept quiet and hoped that soon you could return to a normal life.
“As time went on, the link didn’t vanish. You entered my school and became my Prized Student. Again, I thought about telling you. But, I became aware that you were being bullied. Those students thought that I was giving you special attention. I thought that if I told you the truth, you might believe that as well. That I was only keeping you around, because of this link.
“So I let you live your life, like any other filly. Every day, I was so proud of you. You were once a shut in, but you worked past that to make many wonderful friends. You passed every test I gave with flying colors.
“And with all of your successes, you never let it change who you were inside. You remained the same kind filly I met all those years ago. You didn’t turn into an egotistical mare like some others. How could I not be proud of you?
“But then, I began to get letters from Celestia. She also sensed that the last Element had chosen its bearer. I became worried for you.
“I knew she wanted our countries to unite, so that she could get to the both of us. Me, her sister, and you, a new pawn. Once she had you, you would be sent on dangerous missions that should have gone to trained soldiers. I never wanted that kind of life for you.”
“That’s why you wanted the Department of Research and Development to find a way to stop enemies like Discord,” said a shocked Twilight.
“I started those long ago,” said Luna. “But, as time went by, I put more pressure in that department to make progress. I had hoped that the day would never come that I would have to tell you about the Elements.
“But, the situation has changed. We don’t have years until Discord awakens. We have months! I understand the need for the Elements, but I still refuse to let Celestia have you, just so she can use you. This alliance will allow you to remain a citizen of the Republic, so Celestia will have no power over you.”
“Princess,” whispered Twilight. All anger she had vanished. Princess Luna had done all of this for her own good. Because she cared about her.
And in the end, did it matter? She was still the same Twilight. Knowing this changed nothing about her past, for it could never be a lie. She had lived each day of her own free will. This was just some new data for the future.
“I understand,” said Twilight firmly. “And…I’m sorry I got mad at you.”
“There is no need to apologize,” said Luna with a smile. “I felt the same way every time I found out my sister kept something from me. It’s never pleasant to find out that somepony you trust is keeping something from you, no matter what the reason is. But, the reason can help speed up the forgiveness.”
Twilight nodded. “So, what happens now?”
“Now, we wait for the other bearers to arrive,” said Luna. “Sadly, they don’t know the real reason they are hear is to become your friend.”
“My what?” asked a shocked Twilight.
“Friendship is the key to awakening the full power of the Elements,” said Luna. “Without it, they will be useless.”
“Great,” sighed Twilight. “I just have to make friends with ponies who think that we’re monsters that eat fillies and colts. No pressure there.”
“Well, maybe this might help take some of that pressure off,” replied Luna as her horn began to glow. A moment later, a stone claw appeared in front of Twilight who took a hold of it with her magic. “This is one of Discord’s toenails. I took it with me after I talked with Celestia.”
“Did you tell her?” asked Twilight as she examined the object with great interest.
“No,” replied Luna. “She wants to use the Elements of Harmony to seal Discord away again. She has never considered any other possibilities. Perhaps reforming him, but that is much more risky. With this-”
“With this, we can test some of our anti-Discord technology,” interrupted Twilight with a gleam in her eye. “We might even be able to make sure that Operation Umbrella only affects Discord!”
“Very true, my little pony,” said Luna. “But, that doesn’t mean that I don’t want you to try and befriend those coming from Equestria. This isn’t just about Discord, but the fate of both the Republic and Equestria. Just keep an open mind. Who knows, after a while, you might realize you all have something in common.”
“Yes Princess,” said Twilight. “I’ll give them a chance.” And she meant that.
Is there a place where I could read the comics online? Because I'd be all over that in a heartbeat.
Before I begin to read:
Is Twilight changing thousand years of history, or is she swapping places with herself from an alternate universe or is she just "looking through some kind of portal"?
Is she still an alicorn on the "other side"?
While there are no sad/dark/tragic tags, does anyone important die / go evil / have a much more worse life than on the "other side" / hunt twilight for some reason like something ursa minor something?
Before I start to read this "Lunaverse" fic, I would like to know something about it. Because the popular version with Trixie as main protagonist... well, I can't say anything nice about it, so I shan't say anything.
Ok, just finished this chapter. AWSOME!
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The way this story is set up is a little confusing. Twilight set up a spell to see is her and her friends would still be friends in Luna had never been banished. They were supposed to be like ghosts in this world, but so far we haven't seen them. It seems to be taking place around the time of the first episode so no, Twilight is just a unicorn.
While there are some dark elements, no pony dies. Also, I wouldn't call this a Lunaverse fic. You just have to read to find out more
I'm still waiting some redemption for Celestia and Equestria, while I am enjoying this fic the whole "The Lunar Republic and Luna are Just Better" angle still leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Also still waiting to see how the regular main six react, are they watching or did Twilight's spell erase them from existence? (which would be tragic IMHO). The "Tyrant Celestia" "Victim Luna" dynamic just feels so... uninspired to me.
Apologies for the length
Well it seems that with these last two chapters the time has come for me to part ways with this story, keep in mind that this is not intended to be an insult but a simple acknowledgement of the realization of my main fear in regards to this story, and that is quite simply that the hole you dug for Celestia and Equestria is simply to deep to overcome.
To be fair since my last comment I have noticed a effort to fix some of the issues I several others have had with your portrayal of Celestia. However just as you seemed to have her take positive steps to mend her relationship with Luna you opted to have her violate Luna’s mind, binning painful memories of her childhood in a rather despicable attempt at manipulate her into some form of reconciliation. That development for me essentially erased any progress you made in redeeming her in this story. At the same time we found out that Celestia was the one who was selected by their father to be the future ruler and raised with this in mind, that she has depicted as failing so utterly in that role does nothing to help her depiction. As a side note I have to say I see Candace acting more like Celestia then Celestia herself.
Now I was about to right the whole story off at that point as “not for me” but I decided to wait to see how the meeting between Luna and Celestia played out, I have to say basic trade agreement and an establishment of diplomatic relations between the two nations was about the best possible outcome that one could hope for out of that situation. Unfortunately despite of your effort to cast some of the fault on Luna and the republic, as I said previously this latest chapter with its breakdown of the basic differences between two nations as well and the way in which the two sisters interacted, the disparity seems to be to great to realistic overcome within the confines of the story.
With that said I feel the need address your portrayals of Celestia, Equestria and the Republic specifically. I had said in my previous comment that you had portrayed her as comically inept as a leader and I feel that this situation has only gotten worse with her recent actions and revelations that they lead to, in-fact with this latest chapter and your authors note you really seem to view everything about her in the worst possible light. Now unless I have missed something we are to believe that after being brought up to rule she is so terrible at it that she got ever intelligent and forward thinking ponies to agree that there was a serious problem, but that they also universally agreed on how to deal with said problem and that was to abandon the country. Not only did they ALL flee but in the intervening 1000 years no new intelligentsia rose and next to no progress socially or technologically was made, that is the single most damning aspect of her portrayal in this story. On top of that you seem to have taken the fannon position that she is a “master manipulator” or “chess master”,a position I generally disagree with. While I see where people are coming from when they make this claim, in my opinion you have taken this idea to far, as well as make her incompetent at that as well, not one of her schemes has worked thus far in the story, someone can correct me if Im wrong on that. I was going to suggest you look at her mirco comic for different take on how she goes about solving problems but given your authors note it seems you already disagree, for a very weak reason in my opinion I really seems like a Lunar Republic story can not exist without tearing down Celestia and/or Equestia in some way.
With regards to the Republic the technological disparity is the second biggest issue I have with your story, I know i am over thinking the whole thing but I cant help myself. Your reason for the state of the republics technological superiority is that all the forward thinking and intelligent ponies fled with Luna. now here is the problem, the republic apparently has issues with food and basic resources, so we have a small group of admittedly inelegant ponies living in a harsh environment with little food or other resources....how did they develop their hyper advanced tech, I could by them having very efficient hydroponics and recycling technologies but not everything you have depicted them having, where are they getting the resources to develop it all. Im left with few possibilities.....magic made it all possible in which case the resource problem is not really a problem, they are trading with other nations, again no real resource problem or simply that there is no resource problem. My point is that if you have a small group of people with scarce food or resources they will be spending their time on basic survival, not developing a utopia (told you I was over thinking it)
You can take or leave any of this its your story and as i said before it seems popular enough, a final thing you may want to keep in mind you have a tendency to “tell” us and not “show” us you say Celestia is a grand manipulator but you show us she fails at it and can not spot treachery amongst those closest to her, and as of this latest chapter apparently Luna is better at coming up with alternatives , you say the Republic is harsh place resources issues but you show us a near utopia with an admittedly harsh justice system, these are the two biggest examples I have but if I recall correctly there have been numerous smaller ones throughout the story.
Cheers
The old teacher in the Celestia mini isn't really causing problems -- that was sort of the whole point. Everyone was assuming she was senile because she was old, but it turned out she actually wasn't. They were just going out of their way to interpret everything she did in the worst possible light. It's almost the exact same message you've been going for with this story, in fact.
Now, the Spike mini... OH MY GOD. WHY.
Gooosed
I know you said a couple chapters ago that you where going to tone down the bashing of Celestia and Equestria and try to show that the Republic has its fair share of problems, the thing is, you really haven't done that. Now normally I would list my reasons for thinking this, but EternalLurker already said most of it so I would just be restating what he already said. I'm hoping you have some kind of redemption plan in store, but I don't know what you can possible do by this point.
Are we going to revisit what is going on with the Bat ponies and the Buffalo? I find that subplot intriguing.
3511639
I'm sorry for that. Personally, I thought I toned down on it a bit.
3511727 Well, to be fair, you were starting to, then you had Celestia do that mind thing with Luna which pretty much destroyed any progress that she had made by that point.
3511264
It is unknown to rather if the Mane 6 are merely fellow watchers of the events going on, or if they actually redid history. I like to believe the first, which can be seen in my Mane 6 Comments throughout the story.
From a strategic level, a jet that can walk on the ground seems a bit risky to use since it'd be lightly armored and prone to the environment, then again they wouldn't really understand weather a ton.
Scoots was cute
Seeing as this was a mostly serious chapter, and I have no jokes to think of atm. There will be no Mane 6 Comments for this chapter.
3511639>>3511378
Ok, I get what both of you are saying. Celestia hasn't been the best represented. Maybe the author is having troubles getting over his own personal feelings towards Celestia. Or maybe there is a plot reason. It's the butterfly effect. A single change from a thousand years ago can possibly change the way an entire world acts. It would be nice if the author showed us how Celestia and Luna were before this change, then maybe we could see how things changed. Maybe Celestia blamed herself for what happened to her sister and changed how she did things. From what I have been able to gather, Celestia did feel sorry for what happened to Luna's image after seeing what had happened to it after 200 years.
Also, in the last chapter, I can kind of understand what Darthvalgaav was trying to say with Luna. Leaving the Elements in an old, abonded castle just seems stupid. What if some treasure hunter or stupid teenager walked in and found it. What would happen then? Or what if something like somepony stealing Discord's statue occurred? What if some careless grounds worked knocked it down, broke it, and thus released Discord before Twilight went to Ponyville?
But, in the end, Celestia is trying to do the right thing just in the wrong way. She wants to help her country, but is doing it by manipulating everypony around her like chess pieces. And now, after a thousand years. she is finally treating her sister like the princess she was meant to.
Maybe now we'll see Celestia treating Luna a bit better.
3511378 I honestly do not believe that the author has to fix anything. I mean this is a pro Lunar Republic story, so it makes sense that the Lunar Republic would be shown as the better of the two. I do not speak for the author of course on that front. I am just giving my views on the matter, but all the 'problems' that people have mentioned seem to be the major and minor plot points that are in effect driving the story.
Celestia being a master manipulator is entirely probable even in the cannon. I am not saying she is in the cannon of course, but this is an intelligent thinking pony (alicorn) that has lived for thousands of years dealing with politics for a good deal of it. Is it really such a stretch to assume she would become quite good at getting others to do what she wants without using force, or indeed without the other pony even realizing it? After that I could easily imagine it turning into a game of sorts to pass the millenia, and from there to simply becoming how she gets things done as she no longer even has to conciously think about manipulating ponies because after so many years of doing it the act of manipulating others is as natural as breathing. I am not saying that she is doing it maliciously. She is doing it to prevent ponies on either side of the issue from getting hurt, and after several thousand years of doing things this way she does not see the need to change. In the cannon we can assume that the incident with Luna turing into Nightmare Moon was what became Celestia's wake up call, and galvanized her to change her policies on dealing with others. Thus turning her from the political manipulator in this story to more of a mother figure manipulator in the cannon.
The reason it looks like Celestia is falling apart as far as being a master manipulator in the story is in part because she is desperate and desperation will lead to mistakes. It also stems from the fact that once you know someone is trying to manipulate you it becomes harder for them to do it, and any attempt they make is going to seem very obvious as well as incredibly insulting. I doubt very much that Celestia has had to deal with other ponies figuring out her manipulative ways before, so it stands to reason she would be very bad at recovering then continuing. Manipulation has been her fall back for thousands of years, and she believes is the main reason she has a (relatively) peaceful kingdom. We may see it as cruel that she forced a bad memory on her sister, but from her point of view she was doing it to save not only her sister but everypony else as well from Discord.
Imagine if you will your friend is drunk, and trying to get into his car to drive home. Anything you say to stop him will start a fight that will end up with him getting hurt. Will you start the fight to keep him from getting in the car and possibly killing himself as well as someone else, or do you let him go because you do not want to seem like your being mean. That's the situation Celestia thinks she is in with Luna.
As far as the Technology differences go it is simply a matter of need. The ponies on Equestria do not need high technology because they have magic to do everything they need, and the time to recharge said magic. The ponies of the Lunar Republic however did not have the luxury of having spells for everything they needed on the moon, and even with the invention of said spells they would still need time to rest and recharge. The ponies of the Lunar Republic needed high technology to exist on the moon where as to the ponies of Equestria high technology is a novelty. I mean why waste years perfecting a robot to lift heavy objects when a halfway decent unicorn could lift it with magic? I could go on listing every little detail that magic is better for than tech, but you get the point. Technology in its later stages does become better than magic, but you have to work past the intial 'novelty' phase and Equestria just has not felt the need.
When it comes to how the ponies survived on the moon in the intial stages I can only speculate. I personally believe that the intial group was not overly large, so it would have been easier to provide for their needs. I would imagine that in the beginning Luna as well as any unicorns would have had to do most of the work to keep breathable air in magic domes, and switching off when one got tired. Meanwhile the earth ponies and pegasai would be focusing on trying to get plants started so they could recycle their air supply as well as grow food. Then there was probably an R&D group that set to work trying to make the first air tight domes. I can only speculate at this point, but who knows may be the author will do a prequel to show how the first colonist on the moon survived, and the hardships they went through.
I am sorry this is so long, but I believe this addresses most of the issues people have with this story.
3512084
The only reason I said anything is because the author has said a few times it was not his intention to have the story come off so one sided, haven said that, at this point i don't see anyway to correct that. And before I go what I meant about technology and resources was not so much about need and more about capability, for more mundane example if a society has little or no access to iron they wont be able to develop iron working no matter how much they need it to exist, or bronze if they have no access to copper and tin they wont be able to develop bronze working, no uranium or plutonium no nuclear power and so on. I brought this up as the Darth had stated several times that the republic suffered from a lack of resources seeing all the high tech tells me that resources are not a serious problem. As i said i know I'm over thinking it but stuff like that will take me out a story far quicker than most anything else, that and a large nation somehow loosing every intelligence individual and over the course of a 1000 years not developing any new intellects.
Anyway I knew there was a strong likelihood I would have to give up on this story it being a Luna Republic story and all that entails but I hung around to see if Darth could balance it out, I cant see that happening at this point so I shale respectfully take my leave.
Gooday to you all
4 days until season 4!!! Luck us drink and read ponies sand be merry!!!
3512340 I did not mean to offend you or anything I am just trying to explain how I personally see the author's world unfold, and may be get some of the others that are on the fence to give it a second look themselves.
I am like you in the sense that i do tend to over think things from time to time, but then after I ask the question I cannot help trying to then answer it for myself. I do agree that oddly enough they do seem to have enough resources to make such a civilization, but not enough to sustain it for the long term kind of seems weird. I look at it like this though...in the beginning they were not a 'nation' yet so Luna could probably appropriate what they needed from the surface. Celestia, still thinking this was just a phase her sister was going through, would not have seen the need to step in just yet. This would also explain the stories of Equestrian ponies thinking moon ponies are thieves, and/or even why bat ponies started getting blamed for things getting stolen. Once the Lunar ponies discovered they could mine ore and water from meteors and various space debris they relied less on taking things from the surface. After a few hundred years it probably became a point of pride that they could sustain themselves without help from the surface, and since they had by that point become their own sovereign nation they could not simply keep stealing from their neighbors. Unfortunately meteors are not a stable or predictable resource which leaves them where they are now.
As far as intelligent ponies left on Equestria I would say there are most likely many. I mean Luna did not take all the Intelligent ponies although she did take many that were willing to think outside the box. The tech again comes to necessity...the Equestrian ponies do not need high tech stuff, so it was never focused on. It was not that they were not smart enough, but that it was simply not important enough. In my head cannon I could see the 'noble' unicorns keeping such technology held back simply to keep their own position of superiority. After all if an earth pony with the right tech can do what a unicorn can then suddenly they are not so special. Although in a high tech world i could see unicorns being able to make computers easier due to fine magic control, and be able to handle things like plutonium and other dangerous materials much easier thanks to their magic fields.
I wish you luck on your future endeavors, and hope to see you on some other fics!
Get ready the Fail bomb! Chaos has no master, Discord is just one of the many outlets of it.
Nice choice Princess Luna, consider your chances of surviving a Discord break out reduced by 25%. He knows where you live now and attempting to fight him.
3512652
Oh there was no offence taken so don't worry about that. I said all the intelligent ponies based of Darth's comments that ever single intelligent forward thinking ponies fled to the moon leaving nothing but racist ponies behind, guess i should have been more clear on that. See what you suggested about the ruling class suppressing all social and technological development, that is the only way i could see such a stagnation actually happening, although even then the whole thousands time frame that this would have had to last presents its own set of problems. However that also would simply add into my other major issue with the story. Clestia would have to be incapable of fulfilling any leadership roll if that type of suppression was to go on for that long under her watch, while at the same time being a 'master manipulator' or 'chess master' she cant be both, I guess she could be actively participating in the suppression but then that just makes her a tyrant.
Just once I would like to see a story with the Lunar republic that does not justify the republics existence by throwing Clestia and equestria under the bus......well there was that one that made both of them evil and locked in a near eternal war, Celestia is a mad god empresses, Twilight's life is sustained by unholy magic and like 16 generations of descendants of Trixie have fallen before her in combat, oh Luna sold the republic to the changelings as a food source. Kinda sad that that is the most 'balanced' depiction Ive ever seen in a Lunar Republic story.
Ooooh this is getting juicy with some nice plot : D
3511329
Amen brother.
3511727...
Missed out upon fully commenting upon Chapter 34 [damn you Real Life & work, damn you..! ], but I can toss in 2 pony-bits towards it before moving forward...
You have taken some forward steps in redressing the problem so many have with your Celestia being a literary anchor dragging down the overall quality of your fan-fiction; and that is a good thing, keep it up such efforts . As I also previously mentioned, you still have a long way to go before your Celestia is viewed more as an worthy story antagonist (note "antagonist," not "villain," knowing the difference is what makes for good writing) that the reader-audience can enjoy disliking/hating, rather than an object of contempt that is weighing down your story.
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In regards to Chapter 35...
1. Overall another good chapter, though I felt that the "mom" scene could have had a greater emotional impact with more work on the scene, but not everyone has had field-experience with orphan-adoption & -integration, so I can let that pass easily enough .
2. I look forward to seeing how you portray bonding between Scootaloo and Shadow Blade. I would it think the bonding process flow even easier since so many factors are in symmetry between the two flyers (or is it "fliers"...?), from flight-training, to Scootaloo's desire to become a Lunar Royal Guard, and even Shadow having been the one to have found Scootaloo in the first place. I can see Scootaloo coming to call Shadow "dad" fairly quickly.
3. An potentially "interesting" set-up for what will happen to the Element-bearers' homes & businesses while they are away up in the Lunar Republic. With the current still-incompetent Celestia, who has no control or loyalty among her own staff and Solar Royal Guards, it would not be terribly surprising if things went to Hades in a hand-basket...
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4. I liked the scene between Twilight Sparkle and Princess Luna. Whether it backfires upon Luna; or even if it does backfire, yet Twilight still finds a way to push it through and make it work, will be interesting to read. Regardless, it is a vast gulf of difference between being an unknowing pawn, or striding across the board with your eyes open and head held high.
What is the difference between "Fate" and "Destiny"...?
"Fate" is when you surrender your choice & will to whatever Life carries you along to.
"Destiny" is when you take control of whatever "Fate" or Life throws at you, and lead it to whatever ends you choose.
3511981
I disagree with the elements being kept in the old castle. It was in the Everfree Forest home to DEADLY MONSTERS! Not only that but remember that when the elements were first found they were just stone spheres so somepony who didn't know what they were( good possibility of that since the elements wouldn't have been used since Discord since Luna didn't become Nightmare Moon) the pony would just go "All that for a bunch of rocks?"
Great chapter. So Dash and the other finally know about Scootaloo being in the republic.
What Luna did was kind of risky ... oh well.
Everything is going to be fine anyway...or not.
Yay another update. Though I am starting to wonder just why the Lunar Republic has so much crazy super tech. It makes me wonder two things at the same time, one being no wonder they are having a resource shortage if they keep building weapons of war centuries beyond any other civilization they know about...and also I wonder HOW they have resource shortage if they could afford to make such weapons and tools. @_@
3511264 I honestly have no idea why your comment has so many thumbs down. Your question is a legitimate one that even I don't know, even after reading 40 chapters. It does bother me that I don't know if she just changed all of history, or if they are viewing it all but the author is ignoring them. Honestly, if history was changed I don't even see the point of the spell to view 'what ifs'. The author could have just wrote this story as an alternate universe. But I guess the premise does get a bigger audience.
3518748 I know the unevers always faverred the bold
5509667 A-are you misspelling words intentionally?
Note: I tend to not read comments, or at least very many, so of I repeat someone else, sorry.
Well Twilight, those are good points. But remeber: this machine, as both an air based and land based weapon, can be used in more places. This alllows you to bring armor to the battlefield swiftly, as well as allowing it to cross gaps or terrain your hover tanks can't. It can also be used for recon and quick hit-and-run strikes, or for flanking. Imagine if an army is fighting you, and then suddenly, a bunch of armored mechs drop in at your back, guns blazing. And last but not least:
VIKINGS ARE AWESOME!!!!!!!
th07.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2010/235/3/e/Starcraft_II_Viking_by_ZergRex.png
3527589
It's more about water, food, and space than raw materials amd money. You can get a lot of the later from mining astroids, while the former is harder. As to why militarize? The Republic is like a short kid, who is fighting with his brother, has health issues, no friends, lives far away, and is encircled with nasty rumers. How do they avoid getting picked on? Be smarter, faster, and stronger to such a degree that no one messes with you for fear of a well-kicked ass.
But what if it wasn't? Would she still like it?
Sorry, I just came out of Philosophy Club.
Because ... well you know =
3515647 Maybe and maybe not. Already we have the Batponies making a home there, so Luna's concern is valid. Fact of the matter is, some treasure hunter could have gone in there. Heck maybe someone like Maud might be able to tell that they are special!
Oh my gosh I hovered the mouse over the Next button and it said "To the Republic!" and then I hovered the mouse over the previous button and it said "Alliance" and I'm like "Heck yeah, I'll take the Republic please!"
I'm laughing my head off right now!
So...a few thoughts on Celestia and this story.
In this timeline, Celestia becomes ineffective due to taking far too long to make decisions and an unwillingness to be the iron hoof. She also wants her ponies to figure things out themselves. That means that in the normal timeline, Equestria is better off because Luna becoming Nightmare Moon forced her to both act quickly and to make hard, painful decisions. Ironic isn't it.
Next, you have issues with Celestia not bringing her sister places...but from what Hasbro has been showing us, Luna sleeps during the day mostly.
Then there are the missions...namely the dragon. Now, it's been a while so I may not remember correctly, but did that dragon do more than toss Rainbow out when she got rough? It could just as easily be that Celestia knew that dragon wasn't particularly dangerous, but stubborn. After all, it's living in Equestria, so it must behave well enough.
As for not telling Twilight, which everyone seems to have issues with, the Twilight of Canon would never have been able to handle the knowledge that she had to make friends with these specific ponies. This Twilight can.
And now for the Zecora debate. Consider this: There is someone, who lives say....in the heart of the dark woods filled with man-eating beasts (say rabid tigers, bears, and wolves), but is not harmed by them. They rarely ever come to town, but when they do, their faces are concealed by a long cloak. They never talk to anyone, just buy stuff and leave (we're going to assume that everyone doesný close down their shops due to the Flower Trio). How many scary, messed up stories would be floating around your small town just from that? Without someone like Pinkie Pie spreading random messed up gossip....most likely because it's too fun? People do that to each other all the time, IRL! And that's just because they never leave their house, have too many pets, or some other nonsense! The show wasn't trying to do a lesson on racism, it was trying to show how you should get to know people before you judge them. Hasbro is not about to take on racism at this point if they ever will. That's why the episode was called Bridle GOSSIP.
Plot twist: scootaloo is secretly a changeling... Somehow...
3527589
Their resource shortage is water. Food has been mentioned as well. I don't think the war plane mech thing was made of water or food.
More Celestia slander. At this point if you have this level of distrust for your sister it will never work out. I find it hilarious the first time your sister let you in on the plan until you don't tell anyone you tell the person you probably should have never told. I have a feeling this is probably going to end badly but maybe not. But I'm kind of getting mixed signals here Luna is saying that we should work together but behind celestials back she's bad-mouthing her at every chance she gets. If I was a citizens a soldier or someone who worked in the government I would think I should never trust Celestia no matter even if Luna at the presence of Celestia tells her to do something.