• Member Since 10th Jul, 2011
  • offline last seen November 18th

Ebon Mane



E

When Rainbow Dash crashes into an impromptu sleepover at Twilight's library, the unicorn seems to be acting strangely, though Dash doesn't think too much of it. As usual, the pegasus has little thought for the feelings of those around her. Some ponies are just oblivious.

Chapters (4)
Comments ( 57 )

I prefer the alternate ending, are you going to write another chapter? I would definitely like to read the events that follow :)

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Actually, Lunafyre on deviantart ( http://lunafyre.deviantart.com/ ) did a sequel titled "Through the Storm". It's longer than the original fic. You might find it worth checking out, though I warn you that it has adult content, so avoid it if you dislike lesbian ponysex.

I like this second ending, the happier one. I've never been one for sad ends.

Other one is sader but I prefer it, Dash is STRAIGHT people! :trixieshiftleft:

Wow, Twilight is in love with Dash, instead of the other way around? Way to break the cliche!

And beautifully written as always. <3

First you have Twilight in love with Dash instead of the other way around, and now you have Dash as the clueless one instead of Twilight? Such reverse cliches you got going on here! I love it! :D

ha ha ha rainbow is clue less about what happend

#8 · Sep 26th, 2011 · · · Chapter 2 ·

wow dash your so clue less

good story

wow good altered ending but sad still :fluttershysad:

good story i like this ending than the other one

I'm a sucker for happy endings :heart:
I'll have to check out that sequel, thanks for the suggestion!

:yay: ending 2! I love when everything works out for the sake of the to-be couple!

Happy ending for the win!! good work,. this was a great read and I had fun reading it

:twilightblush::rainbowkiss:

I read about it in 'Sleepover 101'

(buzz)ERRRRRRRRRRR you just lost one internet!

Slumber 101!

Oh this ending was a nice pick me up after the last Rainbow dash fic I read, made me end up in tears. Unrequited love makes me want to just kind of shrivel up and die in stories lol :fluttercry:

this is a much better ending than the other one

As much as I like both Rainbow Dash and Twilight, and as much as I want them to be happy together, I actually found the sad ending to be the more satisfying of the two. Don't know why exactly.

Personally I enjoy endings with more emotional impact (whether it be happy, sad, or down right depressing) so I kinda have to go with the first ending. Ya its sad, but it has the emotional impact that frankly the second is lacking. I have seen some otherwise great stories end up drab and boring because the writer tried to force a happy ending. Besides some of the best fan fics out there have sad endings, My Little Dashie would probably be the best example of this.

727
is there something wrong with mares liking mares? :rainbowhuh:

Well- written. You did a good job on the 'it could go either way' sense.

Regardless whether one thinks the mare(s) in question ought to be het, homo, or bi- it's well-written and it's about two people (in the psychological sense, not the 'humans' sense....).


Well-written bit of entertainment. :twilightsmile:

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I don't suppose you could provide a link? I can't seem to find it on her page.

"Dash, has anypony ever had a crush on you?"

"I don't know. Maybe?" Dash was caught off guard by the question.

Twilight's voice was quiet, "...Well, one does now."

"Who is it?"
i55.photobucket.com/albums/g140/MeepChick/Friendship%20is%20Magic/Facehoof.jpg
Good story, anyhow.

Hmm. I prefer the sad ending. Has more punch.

Well, I'm glad I read this. Occasional LUS and frequent derps in dialogue punctuation aside, this paints a pretty compelling picture of Twilight. I've never particularly been a fan of the ship, but you justify it nicely in a very short time with her speech about storms. The use of dramatic irony is very nice here: we know what Twilight's really talking about, but Dash is oblivious.

Both endings are good, I personally like the happy ending, but that is just because I prefer happy endings, if I had no preference the sad ending would probably be the one I prefer, It seems a little better written. I have read the sequel and it is very good I actually read it before this and I thought this looked like it was a precursor to through the storm.

Personally I like both endings equally. Was confused at first though, though the last two chapters both having the "Alternate Ending" title meant that the second part was the original ending. Big wut moment. I see now, though, that you just meant to leave it up to the reader which was "true," ambiguous a word as that is for fiction.

Very nice piece.

Unbelievable great Story! And i love the concept that dash didn't got it :heart:!

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Despite finding neither ending satisfying, I'm upvoting this. I will say it was quite a lot of buildup for not much payoff. I guess I just like shipping that much.

2512560

Also it wasn't a very good story.

So there's that.

gt

Silence to storm is my way. Silence is my way. Happiness is my way.

Storms are cool. To look at at least. Just not as an ending. In my opinion at least.


The grammar mistakes are supposed to be symbolic or some shit, but here are my thoughts. Sad ending was sad, Happy ending was happy. I love happy endings more. I admit I overuse happy plots to stories, but it's just how I was raised, with winners and happiness.

134318
I have to agree that I prefer the sad ending as well.

It is still a nice little vignette.

Reread again. I continue to enjoy the framing device of lightning used to capture moments of the world, both external while storm-gazing and facial in confrontation. These snapshots force periods of observation and reflection that control pacing and envelop the reader in the atmosphere. The storm feels very real. I like the storm you've written.

The stuff about ponies was ok. :)

Both endings were good. I preferred the happy ending, just because I like happy endings. I love how oblivious Rainbow Dash is in this story. :twilightsmile:

God this story's old. Guess I'm really digging deep here. :twilightsmile:
It's good thus far. Let's hope this keeps up.

This was the first TwiDash fic I've ever read, and roughly the 3rd-4th MLP fic I ever read. That was a few years ago, right after S2 finale- read at Fanfiction originally, not here at FIMFiction.

While this may not be the best-written story on the site, it will always have a special spot in my eyes, introducing me to this great new world of creativity. And for that, I thank you. :twilightsmile:

Dammit, I want clop! Where's the clop?

4029836

Well actually, someone named Lunafyre wrote a clop sequel to this and it is posted here: http://explicit.ponyfictionarchive.net/viewstory.php?sid=221&warning=9

I love storms a lot I love listening to them watching them etc but going out in a storm like that? Yeah, twi's lost it:twilightoops: lol

4031822
Wow. Tell me is that flattering or a little insulting?

Certain death is my bitch!
Rainbow you crack me up!:rainbowlaugh:

sad end is sad.

And sadly better. I would love to see some sort of epiloug to this. Maybe something showing them in a big get together with their friends, Twilight making sure to keep herself distant from RD so as not to make her remember the "Disgusting" thing Twi had done. Or something like that. It can be purely sad or somewhat upbeat with Dash showing that she's making an effort to keep herself acting like the normal loyal friend and not react poorly to Twilight being close to her.

Or something like that. X3 I just really want something like that X3

Either way. Sad end is good end.

Swift, brash, violent, beautiful." Twilight sighed

You just described Dash as well. Also, Rainbow! You heartless, souleating freak! You just insulted your best friend who, at the moment, has a crush on you!

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