• Member Since 18th Nov, 2012
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Dan_s Comments


Story teller at heart. I like to examine the unusual. I spend too much time being 'reasonable'. I write to play, and hope others enjoy the results.

T

Another Mystery Crossover: The Conversion Bureau has all but won, and the barrier is closing in. Soon Humanity will be a fading memory. A few last souls are preparing to hand over Earth to its new masters. At the proper place and at the proper time. Celestia is delighted, but should she be?

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 51 )

Someone had to do this. Poor, poor Twillight and Celestia.

NICE! Love it!

(Wonder what the Chatty One will say? Will she bitch that Xlestia is stronger than Cthulu? Demand the story be deleted? What FUN!)

Nice.

And thanks to her Genociding humanity the only thing that can stop Cthulhu ain't comming

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Matt345 #4 · Feb 19th, 2013 · · 1 ·

2144790 Most likely both. That and she'd probably be jealous that this story is better then anything she'll ever write.

Wow

You sicced C'thulu on them.

... You win. I don't think I could do better.

It's not a bad idea, but the delivery was... messy. I noticed a lot of chaff in this story, things that came off more like a "take that!" as opposed to something of plot relevance, and it threw off the flow of the story, in my opinion. While a lot of the points in this story have some meat to them, it's all very lean, like it needed a few thousand more words to flush out the concepts, and without that added weight, the overarching plot fell very flat.

That aside, it also is in desperate need of an editor, as the story is rife with a great many spelling and grammar issues, which also hurts the overall piece. Those caught my eye and ruined the flow every time I went and tried to get into it.

Ultimately, not a horrible story, but definitely not up to your usual standards.

This story has inspired me to do something. Not sure if anything will come of it, but thanks.

2144790
It's not who's stronger, it's who runs out of energy, Cthulhu can be killed, you just can't keep him that way.

2153561


He also eats 1d6 PCs per round

Well, this is definitely something.

2146871
Corrected. Proofreader sent back the uncorrected copy.

This was wonderful.

I salute you.

2155572

Shame they only have one and a bunch of NPCs...... :pinkiehappy:

2172725

That means the NPC die automatically.

2172792

Yes they do (barring plot immunity), it also means that apparently I fail at the funnies :raritydespair:

Still I won't explain the joke even if folks don't get it Initially.... :pinkiehappy:

...:derpytongue2: completely at a loss here

This ef-ing rocks :pinkiehappy:
You should do more stories about the following:
- Yuggoth
- the Nameless City
- Innsmouth
- the hidden city from At the Mountains of Madness

2187473
The only problem would be that before the new/old masters arrive those places are fairly quiet. Although Ponifying a Deep One at Innsmouth might be good for some laughs (Seaponies anyone?)
And after, it would be two minutes of screaming ponies and 90 seconds of damp, crunching sounds.
Although Luna stumbling onto the Dreamlands and running into Nyarlathotep might be rather interesting.

Yes.
Oh gods above and below, yes!

2187678 Luna and Narly? That would be entertaining.

IA! IA! Cthullu kickass!

I knew where this was going the moment those particular coordinates were mentioned.

Good show.

Interesting idea about the potion being also capable of 'newfoaling' equestrian ponies...

Would you believe I was thinking about this literally like 5 minutes before I sat down and read this - granted it included all the other old horrors of Earth's mythology. Anyway, any chance of us seeing a sequal with Luna and the Dreamlands, that could be pretty entertaining.

Oh, hell fucking yes. Poor, little Celestia. If only she'd kept the Tome of Eternal Darkness. Might have stood a fighting chance, albeit the chance of a helicopter fighting an F5 hurricane.

C'thulu Saves; He might get hungy later!

Of course, just wait until Lyra gets her hooves on "The King In Yellow"! Performing that in Ponyville should really change ponies perceptions! :pinkiecrazy:

3323866 Or just kept a few humans around.
3375269 It's Octavia playing the Music of Erich Zann that should be the troubling part,

3375911

Or Twily finding an original first printing of Al Hazred's Necronomicon for the library.

2145031

Okay, I'm curious. What exactly are you referring to here? :rainbowhuh:

3844667 Demonbane
Although a far better answer would be 'Humanity'.

Lä lä cthulhu ftagn

Oh my gosh. I love Lovecraft. This is beautiful. :pinkiecrazy:

4697447 That's the problem, he isn't any more. So lunch is served. And so colorfully arranged.

4766432 There's a Lovecraft group up in the group section of the story you might enjoy. Glad you like it.

Nice twist at the end. Immortal world-creator/eater Physical Goddess of the Sun versus the Godzilla-esque God-Priest of the Old Ones. Fight!

Honestly, the two verses colliding has been played out in full, and the Ponies won(see: The Shadow Wars by Jordan179). It was hard. And messy. But you can't fight Rainbows.:twilightsmile::duck::rainbowdetermined2::ajsmug::pinkiehappy::yay:
Anyway, the Old Ones have another disadvantage: they don't any prophecies regarding Equestria. They have this-and-that regarding humans and a few of the aliens, but ponies are a new variable. This variable literally bucks Gods every other month with Friendship.

2146871

It's not a bad idea, but the delivery was... messy. I noticed a lot of chaff in this story, things that came off more like a "take that!" as opposed to something of plot relevance, and it threw off the flow of the story, in my opinion. While a lot of the points in this story have some meat to them, it's all very lean, like it needed a few thousand more words to flush out the concepts, and without that added weight, the overarching plot fell very flat.

Anyway, all those little digs during the story at Celestia and the ponies... Brilliant! The deep ones have a certain world-view about how conversion and gods work, and they can't imagine it working any other way. This is Unreliable Narrator at its best. It looks on the surface like a terrible anti-TCB fic, but the deep ones genuinely believe that all this terrible stuff is happening on the other side. The wonders of PoV :pinkiecrazy:

Due to Poe's Law, I can't figure out if that was satire or not. :twilightoops: The Shadow War is not a Conversion bureau story, and is also fanfiction, not canon. The main characters are shoggoths and an old one, not deep ones. And the second shoggoths (Jeffers) did pass through the barrier and observe Equestria.

2172828 (Player Character/Princess Celestia both PC) I assume was the pun? Although honestly referring to everypony in Conversion Bureau as an Non-Player Character is incredibly fitting since anything that doesn't immediately and perfectly toe the line becomes Celestia's next sock puppet.

3844667 The Cthulu Mythos. Ancient impossible alien horror chaos gods prophesied to return to this plane of existence and destroy everything. Humans had the ability through sheer willpower and luck to delay the return but it is still inevitable. With the conversion of humanity there is no longer any such defense.

Haha! Serves those cunts right - fucking cthulu comes and kicks their asses!

Don't know who to root for.

6265743 The fish who ate that pegasus. Maybe it was Willy or Nemo.

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

6318834
Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn!

6265743 the drive, they at least only wanted to rule, not completely destroy. They wanted to be worshipped by beings and to, what I believe, have fun with us. It's like playing the Sims. Sometimes something interesting happens, sometimes you make something interesting happen and sometimes you kill everyone. You don't wipe away the cool stuff though.

You should expand on this.

Surprise, it's Cthulhu.

2145031
You say that, implying we could have done literally anything.

8295965
I was making a Demonbane joke

And so Celestia dreamed of things, of horrible eldritch things that cast shadows over stars born at the death of Creation. I'm bored :P

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