• Member Since 27th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen May 29th, 2019

ShadowWalking18


T

When the Mane Six find the barely alive body of a strange creature with gold slitted eyes, they must help it not only adapt to life in Eqestria but help it regain its lost memories. For those memories are the only thing that stands between life and death. But are all those memories safe to be remembered?
*Trying a photo cause my friend says i should get one. Let me know how it works I got dozens to use. Thank TwixSchitz from Deviant Arts she is a good artist*

Chapters (33)
Comments ( 563 )

What do I think? ...I THINK ITS FANTASTIC! :pinkiehappy: It's very original, and one of a kind!:twilightsheepish: Unlike so many other fics I've read recently. :ajbemused: But there are also a bunch of grammatical errors in there, and you should probably get those cleaned up. :twilightsmile: But this is really cool, and I wanna know what happens next! Keep it up! :yay:


Nice to know my work is appreciated. Yes ill get those grammer mistakes take care of. mind pointing them out? I kinda suck at seeing them sometimes :P. Still glad you like it. ill be addin another chapter here in a bit. Only problem i forsee is that damn southern accent of AJs. really hard to get that typed down so any help is welcome.

I'm gonna track this on faith and rage

I see potential in this. I have only one problem.. Sweet Apple ACRES, not Sweet Apple FARM. Please be carful on the names of locations, it can really take away from the story when you call a place or character the wrong name.

is your pic the crimson king

Nope but sure does look like it. but its not. might change it to something more intresting but no its not the Crimson King.

very nice i wonder if it will come too (of course it will you retard)

This is starting to look interesting :pinkiehappy:

This is AWESOME! Btw, I bumped you up 0.2!

This is very good so far, keep it up.:pinkiehappy:

So far so good! This story has great potential. MOAR!!!
ps. I know you know this, but in case you didn't... May be useful for the next chapter :)
Bone fracture

I found some spelling errors:

"But since you are awake I beleive you should be okay though if you will make a full recovery is still unknown you are badly injured."
Correct: believe

"Pinkie you should lay off the questions, he is still recovering for Celestias sack."
Correct: Celestia's sake

That's all I could find!

thank you :) what you think of it?

I gotta say. You definitely have me curious.

Only thing im unsure of is i should remove the dark genre. I dont intend to really kill off anyone important, does dark only count for murder or does it mean other things. like lots of bloody fights and such?

awsome cant wait for more :pinkiehappy:

Very good, keep writing these cool chapters!:pinkiehappy:

I enjoy this so far, tracking but holding back rating for now :pinkiehappy:

Mina-Ka approves.

Hmmm, lets see, so Tez is some type of alien experiment that either escaped or was dumbed into Equestria and he is considered by his creators to be highly dangerous. Judging by the fact that he was one of three objects that fell from the sky, there are at least two more "experiments" loose in Equestria, and I am betting they are not suffering from memory lose. I imagine things should get very interesting soon.

By the way it is nice to know that you planned out the story before you started writing. I have seen more then a few good fics go south because the author didn't think his or her story all the way through.

I like planes.

DAM UNKNOWN POSABLY ALIENS FROM THE MOVIE ALIENS U SCARY.

177106
They are obviously aztec gods, not aliens.

177712 Flake
aztec gods....eating ponies and ripping out their hearts for no fucking reason?
fuck yea now i can try out the starship troopers
-massive fleet flys over equestria to help-

178606 I agree with flake Tezcatlipoca is the name of the Aztecs central god
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tezcatlipoca

More.
"MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERHHHHHHH"
Quiet goat!

I sense a conflict in the coming chapters, not sure when. Possibly a conflict between these mysterious creatures. Either way, great story so far! :pinkiegasp:

This is good, but please proofread your chapters more. I noticed quite a few grammatical errors and awkward phrasings. It is not quite to the point of taking away from the story, but it is getting close.

181189will do. I am accepting proofreaders if anyone intrested.

really cool chapter, i didnt see any spelling?grammer errors but i proberly didnt notice them

If you need any help proofreading, my grammar nazi friend and I are willing to help. (we are currently proofreading another fic)
Great Fic btw; I love it:pinkiehappy:

this may be gory, but it's not DESCIPTIVELY gory (an example of descriptively gory is the well-known story of 'cupcakes' )

SO what do you think. Im trying real hard to do the proofreading, but my schedule gets in the way sometimes.

What you could do is getting some pre-readers (3-5 would probably be a good number)... Sure, this will delay the posting of each chapter a little bit (2-8 hours, which depends on where in the world your pre-readers live). But this would give you some good insight on what could be better, like spoting grammar errors (even a broken clock is right 2 times each day), maybe sharing ideas for future plot development or simply giving you a new perspective on where you want your story to go......

Still hope everyone is enjoying the fic. Now that all of that is done we can begin the more entertaining portions for a bit :) hope you all enjoy that. I know I will.

Enjoying it very much, and what I've seen till now has been very entertaining indeed (remember entertaining does'nt nesseceraly mean action/Micheal Bay/...), like in this chapter when Tez realize he's late and starts to go bananas.

PS: Find my little ''trick'', and I will consider becoming one of your pre-readers.... if I have the time and you want one, that is.:fluttershysad:

Well things just got more interesting. want more

i love the direction this is going:heart:

GOD I love this story..... I major in archaeology, and are more interested in the skandinavian history during the viking age. But I do know of some very basic framwork of the aztecian history, which makes this more and more intriging!

I'm just wondering.... is the others Cort├ęs and Alvarez?
and are you going to implement the Tlaxcaltec in the story some how?

196038 Glad you like it :) glad everyone likes it. I'm a big history buff. I know almost everything there is to know of ancient history, sticks inside my brain like glue. Anyway another chapter will be up very soon.

196072 which part of ancient history? and is this just a hobby or do you actually either study or work with it?

BTW... right now I'm a little torn between if I'm either want Tez to talk about his fragmented memory and confine himself with twiligh about this or keep it hidden! Will wait in great anticipation for how this story will develop. Continue the great work!

196180 for western history its up to the renassiance. for american history only a little. hoping to take a class that deals with it more. Im hoping to teach history one day.

196463
I wish to be an history professor its my dream any way the dark gods demand more or we will need to sacrifice another innocent to the blood god.

201463 Same I want to teach history as a college professor :)

as for more do not worry, the dark gods have been appeased.... for now :pinkiecrazy:

ooo cant wait fo next chapter

wait a sec... is this an aj ship or a twi ship..... godamit please be aj

I'll be damned... would you look at this.... Three major aztecian gods with an identity crisis;
ACOLMIZTLI - ''taking'' ponies over to the path of death instead of keeping the living from passing into the kingdom of the dead.
TEZCATLIPOCA - being all nice, instead of leading the one to the path of evil and confusion.
MEXTLI - God of war and sacrefice... ok he fullfills his roll quite allright!

I was starting to wonder when Quetzalcoatl would show up..... since hes tez rival and all!

Can it be that we will son see a certain jaguar? I must say... the deeper we get into this plot, the more intriging it gets!

206246 :) heh well there will be some explanations to this, and some moments where they act as their nature. But then again a dieties nature is not so easily determined by mortals :P There will be answers of the madness eventually.

I love the new cover art. Is that supposed to be Tez himself, or just just one of the Aztec gods.

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