Rage and Sorrow
The stars hung high over Ponyville and the Everfree Forest. Most ponies, who helped at the searching party regrouped at the hospital after they saw the green sparkles in the air. They all were happy that the party was successful, but this changed quickly, when they saw Big Macintosh and Crimson Tide. While Cal was on his way to get the caravan for the changelings, Rarity and Rainbow Dash explained what happened in the woods.
"And so Manic Moon, Lavender Shine, Octavia, Screwloose and Vinyl Scratch stayed at this tree to find out whats inside. It´s obvious that these changelings are up to no good." Rarity explained.
Major Mare and the rest of the Mane 6 listened to the story with growing concern.
"I´ve never thought about changelings in Ponyville. After this whole wedding fiasco I though they would stay in the Bad Lands. How could they get so close without us noticing it?" Twilight Sparkle asked.
"Don´t you worry about it Twi! We beat them. They won´t try something like this again. I´m pretty sure they´re finishing the problem, while we are..." Rainbow started as suddenly a black flash zoomed over their heads. A loud "No, no, no, no, no!" was all they could hear before the he disappeart.
"Oh my..." whispered Fluttershy.
"Was that Manic Moon? What happened to him?" Twilight asked.
"I don´t know, but if it´s able to make a demon pony panic it´s probadly a big problem for all of us." Apple Jack said with a worried look.
____________________________________________________________________________________________
Manic Moon flew as fast as he could. Every second was counting. They´ve got Trixie. The pony who trained Zelda for the last days was now sitting in a dark hole traped in a cocoon. And this means his daughter was alone with a changeling. The same race, who´s queen threatened him to never cross her path or she would end him and his daughter.
"No, no, no, no, no! Please. Everything but that! Not my daughter!" he screamed. In a record time Manic landed at the front side of his house. The door was wide open.
"No! This door shouldn´t be open." Manic Moon said with pure terror on his face. He stormed inside.
"Zelda!...... Zelda! Please answere me. Where are you.....ZELDA!" he screamed, but nopony answered him. The desperate father run into the kitchen, where he saw both, Zelda and Trixie, for the last time. The table was flipped over and the remains of their dinner scattered over the whole room. For Manic is was like a nightmare became reality. Tears started to form in his eyes. He´d know very well, what happened. The changeling in the forest warned his comrades in Ponyville and the one, who played the role of Trixie, not only ran off, he also took Zelda with him.
For a while Manic Moon just sat in the kitchen, tears silently running down his face. He wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. He just wanted to wallow in his sadness. But out of nowhere came a new emotion over him. Rage. Pure and uncontrolable rage. He would find this changeling and get his daughter back. And if he must end the life of every damn changeling in Equestria and the Bad Lands to get her, he wouldn´t hesitate one second.
He walked to the front door, looking at the night sky. He would show this changelings, how close a real demon pony could get to the old pony legends. But first he needs to find out, where the real hive is. And he´d know four little changelings, who would surely love to tell him the exact coordinates. With a mad smile on his face, he took of into the air again.
____________________________________________________________________________________________
Deep in the Everfree Forest Cal just laid the last changeling into the cell caravan. Two of them were still knocked out, a third one was about to wake up when he slowly opened his eyes and the last one was sitting in a dark corner of the cell angryly staring at the ponies outside.
"And he just flew of." Cal asked the others.
"Yes! He saw Trixie in this last cocoon and was gone. Who could blame him? He left his daughter alone with a changeling." Lavender explained.
"I hope Zelda is safe. She is the center of his world. Nopony could say what he will do, if something happens to her." Octavia said and looked sad on the ground.
"Don´t you worry to much Octi! I´m sure everything will be fine." Vinyl said to cheer Octavia up. She was about to say something else, but was cut of by a dark shadow who landed next to the caravan. Dirt and mud was flying around from the strong impact.
"Manic? Your back already? Is Zelda safe?" Octavia asked and run to him, but he simply walked past her without even looking at her. She turned around and wanted to put her hoof on his shoulder, but stoped. Something about him was off, Like a dark aura on his skin. For the first time in her life she was afraid of her good friend.
"Manic. What´s wrong with you?" Cal asked confused. He ignored him too. The demon pony stoped in front of the cell caravan.
"Are they inside the cell?" Manic asked with an emotionless voise. Cal nodded.
"Yes! They are locked away and I´ve got the only key to open the door. Why do you..." Cal explained before he had to jump aside. The big, iron door of the cell just missed him by an inch and slammed hard on the ground. The force of the impact wreaked her deep into the earthy ground of the Everfree Forest. All ponies looked at Manic Moon, who just a second ago ripped a iron door out of her anchoring like she was made out of paper.
"Are you crazy? You could have hurt Cal, if he hadn´t jumped away in time. What´s the matter with you Manic?" Lavender asked and run to Cal´s side. But the enraged pony still wasn´t listening. He concentrated himself on the four changelings in front of him. Manic simply walked over the two sleeping changelings and kicked away the other one laying in his way. The still weak bug pony hit the iron bars of the cell with it´s head and was knocked out cold again. The last remaining changeling pressed himself against the bars in his back, but he couldn´t escape the angry father. Manic snapped the changeling, lifted him up and hammered the creature so hard against the iron bars that he screamed in pain.
"Where is she? Where is my daughter you stinking abomination?" he said with er stern voise. The changeling looked at him and Manic could have sworn that a weak smile formed on his face.
"She gone........never see again......now part of hive...ki ki ki ki!" was all her replayed. Rage overtook the demon pony again and he slammed his opponent against the bars three more times. The bars already started to bent to the outside.
"Tell me where this hive is or you´ll have more holes in your body than in your legs." Manic said with his face only millimeters away from the changelings face.
"Will not speak.....hive is secret....you´ll never find!" the creature answered with pain in his face. Manic took the changeling and clashed him with full force on the ground. The bug pony was laying on his side with Manic Moon over him. He stepped with one hoof on the head of the changeling and slowly heightened the pressure on it.
"Answer my question! This is your last chance. I´m pretty sure your friends are more willing to help me when they see your headless body." Manic said with an crazy face. The changeling thought for a moment and finaly started to talk.
"Hive in Badlands......in shadow of mountain.....in the west." the changeling said nervously. Manic took his hoof away and walked out of the cell. He was about to take off, when suddenly a magical aura pinned him on the ground. Manic looked over his shoulder and saw all members of the Mane 6, nurse Red Heart and the Major Mare.
"What is going on?" asked Twilight Sparkle while she pinned Manic Moon down with her magic.
"We just came here to help you guys and find out, whats the problem and the first thing we all see is like you´re torturing a changling. What in tarnation is wrong with you Manic?" Apple Jack said. The demon pony did his best to fight the magic aura, but couldn´t break free. He took a deep breath and started to calm down.
"Okey Twilight! Let me go. I promise I won´t fly away." he said and Celestias student did as told. Manic stood up and sat himself on the ground.
"I´m so sorry everypony. I guess I´ve just lost the control over myself. They´ve got Zelda and when I saw my empty home I saw red." Manic explained.
"Oh no! They realy kidnaped Zelda. But why would they do that?" Octavia asked.
"I don´t know. Maybe the changeling, who disguised himself as Trixie paniced when he heard the warning of his friend and thought a hostage who´d make sure nopony would stop him on his way home." Manic Moon said.
"Well, if that´s the case we´ve got luck, cause this would mean he can´t risk his only defence against royal guard and little Zelda is safe for now." Cal stated, but Manic shook his head.
"No! No! No! No! No! You guys don´t understand. We´re running out of time. Zelda must not reach the hive!" he said.
"Why? asked Lavender Shine.
"Chrysalis once wrote in her letter that she never wants to see me or my daughter again or she would end us for shore. Nopony knows, what will happen when she sees Zelda. What if.....What if..." he explained until Octavia cut him of by taking his hoof and holding him with her two front hooves.
"She would never hurt her own granddaughter Manic. I´m shore Zelda is absolutly safe." the music mare said and smiled at him. He raised his head and smiled back.
"I hope you´re right Octavia.....I hope you´re right." he answered.
"Don´t you worry too much Manic Moon. As soon as we are back in Ponyville, I´ll write a letter to princess Celestia. I´m sure she will know what to do. Til then we all should get some rest. There is a lot of work to do for us in the next time." Twilight Sparkle said.
"I guess she´s right. The night is almost over and we all could use some sleep." Red Heart answered.
"All right. Lavender Shine,Pinkie Pie, Red Heart and I will stay here and get this ponies out of the cocoons." Apple Jack said.
"Oh yes! The ponies in the cave. I´ve nearly forget them. We better get them out of these cocoons." Twilight said with a week smile and scratched the back of her head.
The group of ponies left the Everfree Forest and split up. Twilight Sparkle went to the library to contact the princess of the sun. Rarity, Fluttershy and Screwloose went back to the hospital, while Cal and Vinyl Scratch brough the caravan with the changelings to the police station. Octavia and Manic Moon stood at the front door of his house.
"Are you shore that I shoudn´t come in with you? I could stay over night if you want." Octavia offert.
"No, but thanks for the offer. I need some time alone to clear my mind and think about everything. I´ll see you tomorrow Octavia. Good night!" he answered and without waiting for her answer he closed the door. She turned around and started to walk back home.
"Please don´t do something stupid Manic." the mare said more to herself then to anypony else.
____________________________________________________________________________________________
There was no sleep for Manic Moon in this night and he knew that very well. At first he was just walking trough the house without any real destination. He wasn´t sure, why he did it. Maybe he was still hoping to find Zelda. That she just hide herself in a dark corner, to affraid to say something. Soon enough he gave up and sat himself on the couch. After a while he looked at the shelf over the fireplace. A lot of pictures were standing on it.
The first one on the left was the oldest too. The picture showed his grandpa and a very young Manic Moon. He was sitting on his back and both smiled. Manic was always proud that he could life his grandpa´s dream for him. The next picture was cut out of a newspaper. On it was Manic and two other ponies. One was an earthpony mare with a white mane and a light orange fur. She was wearing a brown hat and had a candy corn cutie mark. The other one was a colt with a long grey mane and light blue fur. He had two burning aces for a cutie mark. All three stood in front of a bar. Manic remembered that day pretty well. It was the great opening of the Red Aces club. For Candy Corn and Ashes, a dream come truth and for Manic, it was his first real job since he lifed on the surface.
He moved on to the next one. On this picture stood Manic behind the bar. On the stools in front of the bar sat 3 ponies. A brown colt with dark/brown mane and a black beard, holding a wine glas. A mare with a light purple mane and orange fur. She wore a black necklace and had a beer glass in her hoof. The last one had a dark blue fur and a light blue mane. The mare had a big cup with a black liquid inside. All three were waving at the camera and smiling. His best costumers and good friends of Manic Moon. He was still hoping to see them again one day.
The next picture showed Manic Moon and Light holding each other. His first and only Hearts and Hooves day with the love of his life. He would give all his bits for one more day like this with her. If Light was still alive, all of this might never have happened. Zelda would still be here and he would now lay in his bed, peacefully sleeping next to her. But this would never happen. Light was dead and Zelda was abducted.
What brought him to the last picture. On this one you could see Manic Moon holding baby Zelda in his hooves. She was laughting and Manic was looking at her with the unbreakable love of a father to his daughter. Octavia took the picture for him just 3 weeks after Zelda was brought to him. Most of the time he loved to look at all these pictures. They showed him all he archived in his life and all the ponies he met. But right now none of them could light his mood.
He stood up and walked upstairs in Zeldas room. The room was a complete mess, but not because of the changeling. His daughter wasn´t very fussy and before he got her, Manic wasn´t either. He was sitting on her bed and looked around. He saw all the toys he bought for her, all the pictures she drew for him, everything was full of memories. Finally he saw Ms Bugg Pants, "Zeldas" most favorite toy. Manic would never forget how happy she was when he suprised her with the doll. He took the doll and pressed it against his heart. Tear started to run down his face.
"I´m sorry! I´m so sorry Light! I promised you to protect our daughter and failed." he whispered. He sat there for a long time silently crying. But then he stood up, laid down Ms Bug Pants and walked back downstairs to the front door.
"I´m sorry everypony, but this is family business. If anypony dies because Chrysalis hates me and my daughter I would never forgive myself. I will save her alone or die trying!" he said and opened the door. Carefuly he looked around, if anypony was watching him and than flew away. He knew his destiny. The changeling hive in the Badlands.
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"Celestia show mercy to the ones, there stand between him and his daughter. Because he will not."
That will be very interesting.
was reading through your newest chapter and I found a few errors/typos/things:
I think you might have meant "these" instead of "this"
"not only ran off" could work better here
I think you meant for a "With" instead of the "White". Also, a comma after the "face" would make this grammatically correct.
it should be "center" instead of "centre"
"sure", not "shore"
not so sure that the "him" is needed here
"about to take off..." and "...a magical aura..."
add an "I" in between home and saw with a comma before it
"who'd" instead of "whould" and "would" instead of "wpuld"
"too" instead of "to" along with a comma between ponyville and I'll and " 'Til" instead of "Till"
maybe "I'll" instead of "I"
also, pretty much every "shore" should be "sure"
3291773
Thank you for the tips. Just changed everything.
shit just got real
Shores shores SHORES for the love of baby black jesus its sure! :
3292056
you're welcome, but I wasn't done reading it when I posted the comment. here are a few more things:
"he" instead of "her", add a comma before "was" and the ever loving turning of "shore" to "sure".
"both" instead of "bouth", "grandpa's" instead of "grandpas", "cut" instead of "cute", and "newspaper" instead of "newpaper".
"come true" instead of "came truth", add a comma after ashes and Manic, and a ";" after true. should flow a bit better.
"one" instead of "on"
"If Light was still alive, all of this might never have happened." sounds a bit better to me.
I think "took" would work better than "made".
"complete" instead of "completly", possibly an "either" instead of "too, and possibly commas after "and" and "Manic".
"everything" instead of "anything", "Finally" instead of "Finaly", Zeldas needs a " ' ", "favorite" instead of "favorit", and "surprised" instead of "supprised".
Also, just to help readers out a little bit more, try to increase the space between paragraphs when Manic was in his home by himself. By that, I mean another line or so, just like the other paragraphs.
So many shores
Isn't it beautiful?
On another note
I sads now
Alright than..........TIME TO GO KILL A BITCH