A Dodgy Business

by MLP-Silver-Quill

Chapter 11: Home Again

Applejack awoke before dawn, like any farmer. Unlike most days, she let herself lie a few extra minutes. Her legs were sore from the final harvest and the rest of her tired from being ponynapped, rescued, nearly crushed, and, well, it was time to go home.

She studied the patterns in the ceiling. Ms. Jubilee’s home. Hers again. No debts, no worries. Oh, there was plenty that still needed doing. She’d need an entire new staff, and loads of repair work for all the stuff that got smashed in Clutterstep’s return. The barn had a chifferobe through its ceiling. Gotta patch that up.

But she had the money to take care of that, and plenty of ponies who wanted to come back and work for her. They’d said so when Lucky Roll and Ms. Jubilee had gone into town to tell everyone about Penelope Preda’s arrest. Applejack and Big Macintosh had stayed behind to keep an eye on Clutterstep. He’d fallen asleep two seconds after tumbling into bed and hadn’t stirred all night. The Apple kin had listened to the celebration in the town square.

“Totally unplanned,” Ms. Jubilee told them on her return, “but so much fun! Why, you’d think that Princess Celestia herself was coming to visit.” That had been the old Cherry Jubilee. The one who’d taken Applejack in and given her a second home. All lively and friendly without tears. That had been celebration enough for Applejack.

A knock at her door. “Come in.”

Big Macintosh crept inside. He had his saddleback over his side.

“All set to go, big bro?”

“Eeyup.”

“Just gimme a sec.” Applejack had packed just before bed. A quick combing of her mane and she was set. She’ worry about a bath once they were back home and she’d hugged Applebloom twenty times. She paused when she realized that it’d been twenty-four hours since she been all set to give up the fight and lose this ranch. What a difference a day made. And the right pony.

“Heck of a harvest.” said Applejack.

“Eeyup.”

“And we still got Applebuck Season.”

“Eeyup.”

“Twilight and the others should be back the same time we get there. I reckon they’d be willing to lend a hoof.”

“Reckon so.” said Big Macintosh with a grin. Twilight could harvest a whole orchard with her magic. They’d have it done in no time. Famous last words. Applejack grinned. “Let’s say our goodbyes real quiet-like. Clutterstep should still be sleeping.”

“Eeyup.” They crept down the hallway and peeked in on Clutterstep’s room. Applejack had a note all set wishing him well and inviting him to Ponyville when he was feeling better. She’d just leave it by his bedside and hope to see him again soon.

His bed was empty.

“Oh, for the love of—!” Applejack charged down the hallway and into the kitchen. She was halfway to the door when a voice came from behind the kitchen table. “Sheesh, somepony’s in a hurry.” Clutterstep sat with a cup of tea between his hooves. Ms. Jubilee was next to him. She looked tired, but happy. She’d gone back to town after checking in with Applejack and Big Macintosh. By the look of it, she’d just gotten back herself.

“You should be in bed!” said Applejack.

“Nah.” said Clutterstep. “Too solid. Started to miss my hammock.” He offered up his tea cup. Ms. Jubilee topped it off using the flask she kept hidden.

“I’ve been trying to get Clutterstep to see reason, but he’s stubborn as a—well, it’s not proper to make comparisons.” Applejack was about to ask what Ms. Jubilee meant when she noticed a fresh pair of saddlebags resting next to Clutterstep. A small set, half the size of Applejack’s. A lighter shade of blue than Clutterstep’s coat and sealed with a silver buckle.

Applejack studied him. “What the hay is going on?”

Clutterstep shrugged. “I’ve resigned. Time to move on.”

“Huh?” Big Macitnosh sat down across from the pair. Applejack joined him.

Clutterstep cleared his throat. “I’m, um, taking off. Gonna say my farewells to Dodge Junction.”

“What for?” said Applejack.

Cherry Jubilee gave them each a filled teacup. “I’ve been trying to tell him there’s no rush. Why, once the worker ponies come back--”

“They’re not going to come back.” said Clutterstep. “Not while I’m here.”

“Aw, sugarcube, why would anypony think that?”

A wry grin spread over Clutterstep. “Well, I did blow up a mountain and rain down debris on their homes. Ponies tend to get a little jittery when you do that. Trust me, I know.” He spoke with experience, and Applejack wasn’t inclined to question.

“Well, shoot.” said Applejack. Then inspiration struck. “In that case, why not come back with us to Ponyville?”

“Eeyup!” Big Macintosh nodded.

“No.” Clutterstep sighed and sipped his blended tea. “I really appreciate it, Jack, Big M. But we both know I’d be knocking over your barn and toppling apple trees before the sun set.”

Applejack scratched at her mane. “That happens pretty often anyway. We’re used to it, aren’t we?”

“Eeyup.” said her brother, a little glum.

“My answer’s still no.” said Clutterstep. “I don’t want to do that to... my friends.” He smiled as he said the word. Like having a drink of water in a drought.

Applejack sat quiet-like for a spell. There was a piece to this she wasn’t catching. She tried to remember everything he’d said and done (which wasn’t hard, given most of it involved crashes). “Is this about Princess Celestia?” Clutterstep’s head snapped up, his eyes wide. Bingo. “There’s bound to be a royal investigation about that there mine blowing. And the arrest of two trolls and a griffon. Stuff like that’s gotta reach the royal ears.” Applejack set her tea cup down. “And then you got all serious when I mentioned writing the Princess. Is that why you don’t wanna come home with us? You think we’ll tell the Princess?”

Clutterstep turned his teacup this way and that. “I’d appreciate it if you didn’t mention me.”

Ms. Jubilee rested her hoof on his. “Clutter, dearie, are you in trouble?”

“No more than usual.” He chuckled. “I’d just rather avoid her as much as I can.” His tone said that was as much as they were going to get, and if they wanted to part civilized then they shouldn’t ask more questions.

“All right.” Applejack deflated. She didn’t want to part ways on bad terms. “But you know, that offer’s always open. Whenever you want a roof over your head and a full belly, you just come see us.”

Clutterstep smiled at her. A warm, genuine smile that lightened the mood. “Thanks, Jack. But no worries about me. I got a pretty generous severance.” He patted the saddlebags. They jingled.

“Which reminds me.” Ms. Jubilee produced two drawstring purses and set them before the Apples. “Your share of the bounty, plus pay for all your help.”

“Oh, Ms. Jubilee! We can’t accept this!” Applejack made to push the purse away. It was dang heavy.

“I won’t hear of it, Applejack. You two went above and beyond and I mean to do well by you both.” She winked at Big Macintosh. “And know that y’all will always have a special place in my heart and a place here at Cherry Hill Ranch.”

“Um... Eeyup.” Big Macintosh accepted the purse and tucked it into his saddlebag. After some extra hesitation, Applejack did the same.

Cherry Jubilee breathed a heavy sigh. “This home’s gonna be a good deal bigger with y’all gone. I really hope you’ll come visit from time to time. I promise the next time will be less, well, life-threatening.” They all shared a good laugh and were interrupted by a knock at the door.

“Now who in Equestria?” Ms. Jubilee went to the kitchen door and swung it wide. The two young Varmin, the ones that had disappeared for the last day or so, stood on the doorstep with paws held behind their backs.

Big Macintosh stood and went beside Ms. Jubilee, and the youngins shrank back.

“Beggin’ your pardon, Ms. Jubilee. It’s just, um, me and my brother was thinking of starting over, and I had this idea-”

“Oy!” said the other tyke. “It was my idea!”

“Was not!” The first Varmin grabbed his brother by the blue overalls.

“Hey!” Big Macintosh stomped a hoof and the Varmin froze mid-struggle. “Brothers don’t fight.”

The two let go and went back to fidgeting on the doorstep. “Yes sir.” said the first. “Anyways, my brother Scramp and me, we was looking for a way out of town after parting ways with Rawley and the others.” Their tails started to twitch, and Applejack could swear she saw a tear try to well up.

Scamp said, “But Scrap and I, we made a promise, y’see. We swore we’d never go back to the homeland. It’s a ruddy place, y’see. So, um, we didn’t know where to go.”

Scrap took over. “And we asked ourselves, what could we do around Dodge? We’s not much for selling or building.”

“More like stealing and sabotage.” muttered Clutterstep. Applejack nudged him under the table.

“So we asked ourselves what place we knew best around these parts. And it was decided,” Scrap shot his brother a look, “that we knew Cherry Hills Ranch the best.”

Cherry Jubilee’s eyes narrowed. “Meaning that y’all have been here enough times, stealing my goods and messing with the property.”

The two Varmin drew in on themselves. “Um, yes’m.”

Scrap added, “But we promise not to do that anymore. You... you gotta believe us, Ms. Jubilee! We ain’t got nowhere else to go and nopony would have us after what we done. But we thought, well, you... you...” The both of them started to shake.

“All right, all right.” Ms. Jubilee drew them both into a hug. She rubbed a hoof over their shoulders and looked to Applejack. “Light the stove, will you dearie? These boys look like they haven’t had a proper meal in a spell.”

Before long, the two Varmin were stuffing their snouts with cherry pancakes drenched in maple syrup. Applejack and Ms. Jubilee sat across from them while Clutterstep and Big Macintosh waited against the far wall.

“So you two want to work at my ranch?” said Ms. Jubilee.

“Yes’m.” said Scrap in between bites. “We’re good and carrying stuff, and we can move real fast.”

Scamp nodded and made to wipe his snout on his sleeve. Ms. Jubilee cleared her throat and nodded at a napkin. The youngin took the hint. “We’s also good and finding little weaknesses, you see? Places folks could sneak in and well...”

“Loosen a branch or two?” said Clutterstep. Neither of the Varmin would look at him.

Ms. Jubilee nodded slowly. “Before I decide anything, I want you two to answer me right honest. Did either of you have anything to do with that branch that hurt Clutterstep?” Both sat up straighter and opened their mouths, but Ms. Jubilee said, “If you lie, I will know. And you will not be welcome on this ranch at all.” That made them hunker back down.

“We, um,” Scrap stuttered, “we don’t know which branch dropped, mum, but we...”

“We did help.” said Scamp. “Rawley’s orders, you see?”

“I do see.” Ms. Jubilee looked at Clutterstep. “Was your noggin, dearie. What do you have to say?”

Now they tykes were looking at him. Had the look of caterpillars staring at a flock of birds. Clutterstep looked at them a good long while before he pushed away from the wall and stood behind Ms. Jubilee and Applejack.

“Give ‘em a job.” he said.

“Really?” said the twins.

“You sure?” said Applejack.

Clutterstep shrugged and helped himself to a leftover pancake. “For the most part, I was on my own growing up. I made a lot of stupid, stupid mistakes. Lucky I’m still standing here.” He glared at the two Varmin. “Now you guys, you’ve made some stupid mistakes of your own. And I want to make this clear: anything that Rawley taught you gets left behind right now. You take your lessons from Ms. Jubilee and don’t give her any trouble. Or I’ll find out and come back here.”

“Eeyup.” said Big Macintosh.

“Yeah, him too.”

Ms. Jubilee held up a hoof. “Won’t be necessary, though thank you both kindly.” To the Varmin twins, she said, “If you pilfer or mess with anything, I’ll tan both your hides faster than you can blink. If you’re gonna work for me, you’re gonna have to learn to be honest, respectful, and above all else, learn to share.”

Scamp leaned towards Scrap. “What’s a ‘share’?”

“Dunno. Right funny word, ain’t it?”

Ms. Jubilee cleared her throat, “Do you promise to honor my rules and respect my guests?”

“Yes’m!” They both said, then shivered.

“Cor! Never said a promise and meant it before.”

“Yeah. Feelings bloody odd, doesn’t it?”

Ms. Jubilee said, “And you should both thank Mr. Clutterstep.”

The twins smiled at him. “Yeah. Thanks, mister!”

“You’re not a big a git as Rawley said.”

Clutterstep blinked. “Um. Thank you?”

Applejack stood up and stretched. “Long as that’s settled, I reckon we were about to go catch a train. Losing daylight on the apple harvest now.”

Scrap and Scamp’s first duty on the ranch was to bear Applejack and Clutterstep’s luggage down to the train station. Ponies on the street nodded to Ms. Jubilee and raised eyebrows at the two Varmin, but Applejack noticed not a one looked at Clutterstep. If not for the quickened steps, a pony would think they couldn’t see him at all.

“They could at least say howdy.” she said.

Clutterstep said, “It’s okay.”

“No it ain’t! You helped save this here town.”

Clutterstep smiled at pointed across the train tracks. “Who needs a thank you when I get to see that?”

On the furthest platform, under the watch of several royal guards, Penelope Preda, the remaining Varmin, and the Grumble Brothers all marched into a steel prisoner car. They were bound by thick chains and a muzzle fit over Preda’s beak. She caught sight of them and that fever crazed came over her eyes.

Clutterstep waved, “Bye-bye, Ms. Feather Duster!”

Preda tried to vault away from the group, a snarl slipping through the leather strips binding her beak. The guards had bound her wings and shackled her claws, and with their unicorn magic she didn’t get half a hoof before being dragged back into the car. Applejack hoped that was the last she ever saw of them.

“Just can’t seem to stop poking the hornet’s nest, can you?” Sheriff Lucky Roll approached the group and took off his hat to nod at Ms. Jubilee. She smiled and nodded back.

Clutterstep grinned, “Just letting her know that she’s not forgotten. I’ll miss her, really. Who am I going to taunt?”

Lucky Roll snorted and said, “So you’re really leaving?”

“Uh-huh. You’re gonna have a much easier time of being sheriff, Rolls.”

“No sir.” said Lucky Roll, his left eye twitching at the nickname. “Just got off the wire with them Appleoosa ponies. Sheriff Silver Star’s sending up a deputy he thinks is ready to handle the bigger stuff. Be up here in ‘bout a week and then I’m out of a job.” He sighed, absently pawing at his badge. “Wasn’t fer me anyway. Too many rules.”

“Well,” said Ms. Jubilee, “if’n you don’t mind a few rules, I could use me some help on the ranch. Keeping these two in line, mind you.” She smiled at Scrap and Scamp.

“Cherry, I would be delighted.” They shared a look then, and Applejack had no doubt that Ms. Jubilee wouldn’t feel lonely for long.

A station conductor called out, “Train to Ponyville departing in ten minutes. Train to Baltimare departing in five!”

“That’s me.” Clutterstep accepted his bag from Scrap and tested the weight.

“It’s all there!” said Scrap.

“Sorry. Force of habit.”

“Baltimare?” said Applejack.

“Being a ranch pony didn’t work out for me. Thought I’d go by Horseshoe Bay and see if I’d made a better sailor.” He gave Ms. Jubilee a hug, nodded to Lucky Roll and the tykes. “Take care of yourselves, Apples.” To Big Macintosh, he gave a solid hoof bump.

Applejack beat him to the hug. “Listen, Clutter, you need to know that them other ponies got it all wrong. You’re a prince. A right prince.” And she could tell by his watering eyes and the broad, genuine smile he gave that she’d said just the right thing.

“Thank you, Applejack.”

“Last call for Baltimare!” Clutterstep turned and dashed into the train car, tripping on the top step. Several passenger ponies jumped off.

“Gonna miss him,” said Lucky Roll. “Bit like loosing a tooth ache.”

“You think we’ll get to see him again?” said Cherry Jubilee.

“Eeyup.”

Applejack grinned, “I can guarantee it.” She winked while she and her brother made their way to their own train. Back to home and friends and family. To a harvest that protected her own place in the world and the comfort that brought. “Clutter may be headed far and away, but we’ve got kin in just about every corner of Equestria. We put the word out, and there’ll be an Apple looking out for him no matter where.”

Because an Apple always honored her friends.

XXXXX

A right tragedy, it was.

Rawley had taken in the whole scene from under the train car. Harumphy and the lads carted off by the fuzz. Scrap and Scamp under the hoof of them ponies. Why, they might actually become honest boys. Oh, the horror!

Rawley offered them a silent toast with the bottle of bourbon he’d swiped before making his way to the train station. The liquor helped numb the ache in his joints from when the sheriff’s office came down on his. Right miracle he’d managed a way out. Someone up there might actually be looking out for him.

All in all, not a bad getaway. He hadn’t a coin to his name and no one to take the next fall, of course, but those details tended to sort themselves out. So long as he had all his parts in the proper place, he could bounce back from anything.

So adieu, Ms. Preda. Fare thee well Dodge Junction. Spin on it, Harumphy and you thickheaded twats. Rawley took another swig and allowed himself a smile.

Security on the train was pretty lax what with them Grumble Brothers being carted off to the great unknown. Be a proper shame not to take advantage of this unique situation.

Rawley crept out of the private cabin he’d helped himself into and stalked down the hallway. Bit of a trick, getting into the passenger car unseen, but nothing beyond his experience and the shadow of a tunnel. Was nearly deserted, which suited him just fine. Them Dodge Ponies would be too busy getting their lives back in order to worry about travel any time soon.

The jingle-jangle of bits in a bag caught his ear and the sweet scent of opportunity filled his snout. One passenger, asleep in his window seat, bit-filled saddlebags next to him. Bloody stupid. Ponies just were too trusting. That’s what made them so wonderful targets.

Yeah, the whole of Equestria was open to him. With deep pockets and low guard. If this weren’t the Infinite Garbage Dumpster’s paradise, it was a bloody fine preview.

Rawley padded up and smiled at the target. He slept with eyes closed and bead of drool coming off his lip. Oh, someone up there definitely likes me. He waited for the car to go over a particularly loud set of tracks before reaching for the saddlebag strap.

A blue hoof slammed down on his paw, pinning him to the seat. And Rawley had just enough thought to send a message to whatever might be watching. Well, bugger you too!

“Hi Rawley.” said Clutterstep. “So good to see you.”

Comments

[bahatumay]

denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw332_small.jpg

[Vailen]

LOL, love the last line there.

[tropenamer]

Clutterstep. On a ship. In the ocean.
This can only end wet

[SFaccountant]

Hooray! Rawley's okay! :D
I like that little bastard! <3

[Lucky424]

I think it would have been better if Celestia saw him just as the train was leaving. And he saw AJ talking to her as if she wasn't a princess.

[Shadow_Wolf]

Excellent story!

[toddmartinez13]

EPIC ENDING! 5 out of 5 stars loved every bit

[toddmartinez13]

EPIC ENDING! 5 out of 5 stars loved every bit

[Burning Sky Cloud]

This chapter of Clutterstep's has drawn to a close, but a new chapter in his life is about to begin. The set up to Imani confirms that! At least the townsfolk of Dodge Junction will now be able to sleep easily at nights now.
I'm glad to see Scrap and Scamp are turning over a new leaf. They'll become right honest boys before long. Reminds me of the two boys in The Ballad of Ricky Bobby. So out of everyone who's going straight to the penitary, it's Preda, the Grumble Brothers, Harumphy and the hissing pony.
I sure wasn't expecting to see Rawley out from the collapsed building. At least he didn't get away totally unscathed. Clutterstep is such a troll though. I wonder what he's got to say to Rawley.

I really felt bad for Lucky Roll. The guy knew what he was doing was wrong and allowed for the law to go awry. And seeing Jubilee in so much pain and turmoil was punishment enough. But thanks to Clutterstep, he was able to perform his duties and make up for what he's done. Kudos to you, Lucky!

And of course, the Apples finally set out for home. Their farm is safe as well as Ponyville and I long to see the day Clutterstep shows up and reunites with Twilight, putting the pieces together for Applejack!

[SweetCaptain77]

Oh, that ending. I could easily see a series of MLP comics with Clutterstep and Rawley. If not, a series of Novelas.

[son_of_heaven176]

That last line!

Epic story, you awesome hippogriff, you.

[SWEETOLEBOB18]

and (at) carrying stuff, and we can move real fast.”

Scamp nodded and made to wipe his snout on his sleeve. Ms. Jubilee cleared her throat and nodded at a napkin. The youngin took the hint. “We’s also good and (at) finding little weaknesses, you see? Places folks could sneak in and well...”

[Rhettbutler]

“Cherry, I would be delighted.” They shared a look then, and Applejack had no doubt that Ms. Jubilee wouldn’t feel lonely for long.

Aw that's nice