Hello, my name is Octavia, and in only one short year I managed to climb my way up to the top of the world of classical music. Where I was world renowned for my masterful showings of the most beautiful songs created by composers over the eons, but now I play my beloved cello for mere spare change, taking shelter at night in the empty doorways of the back allies of the city that never sleeps....
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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you have officially crafted one of the most intriguing Tavi-centric fics I've ever read. please do more. soon.
You will write more, or I will hunt you down!
Kyle, write or your violin gets it
Interesting, different then the original start. I forgot to look for errors
.
I believe you mean "others". Nothing else really stood out to me. It was good. I can't wait for more.
Damn, I'm rather really impressed, I love your writing style, though you could be much more detailed speaking of apperance. I'm glad to see Fancy Pants being in this if only for a bit, he's a great pony, I have much respect for him, though I wish to learn what brought Tavi to such a dark life, poor Octavia. If you ever need any help, ideas or advice, I got your back, I shall be watching you
2132268
thank you!
I'm always looking for feedback to inprove in my craft!
2132286 Never a problem, it is my honor to aid a fellow amazing writer
Hoping you'll like my own fics if you ever have time to look them over, be warned now though some are very dark.
2132340
I dare say I've dapped in the art of the dark story, here see for yourself
The winds of the first storm that ever was assaulted the everfree forest with an ungodly wrath, unrooting ancient trees that have withstood the test of time ever since the first dawn. Sheets of icy rain, colder windigo soul bombarded the landscape below, as lightning dances across the heavens, illuminating the tree tops and the valleys below. While the deafening roar of thunder echoed throughout every crack and crevice of this ancient realm, but despite this rage filled storm an elderly cloaked stallion carrying an old farmer’s scythe walked towards the forest unfazed by what he was witnessing.
The blade of his weapon shimmered with the ghoulish aura of the souls he stolen hours ago, illuminating the path before him and old wooden handle as it moans and groans as the grain of the weathered wood shifted back and forth across the thin cloak, woven from the darkest shadows of the deepest depths depths of the void.
Behind him, two foals followed in close pursuit. The younger of the two, a snowy mare with a brilliant blue mane, glanced pleadingly towards her brother for answers. Her majesty ruby red eyes filled to the brim with terror, as they glaz at her brother. Tears of fear trickled from his stunning amethyst eyes, staining the deep charcoal black checks of his square, broad complexion.
Many a times had they tried to run away to the safety of the shadows. Only to be found and punished by black magic that’d send spasms of pain through their young developing bodies. Now they follow with fears reign tight around their throats, forcing their stiff sore limbs to move as if possessed by the spirits of the dead.
“Talvi!” the colt whispered to his sister, his eyes locked onto what he preseeded to be the back of the elderly stallion head, praying that he couldn’t hear him through the raging storm above. “Got any idea where he’s taking us?”
The filly named Talvi merely opened and closed her mouth silently, unable to summon her voice.
“We are almost there. Just a bit farther,” The Elderly Stallions announces over his shoulder, his voice echoing with that of his latest victims, the voices of the foals parents.
“But where are you taking us?” Asked the colt weakly, fear dripping with every syllable as his voice trembled.
Talvi nodded in agreement, bracing herself for a punishment that would never come.
“You’ll see,” The Elderly Stallion answered, picking up his pace. “Best hurry, the Lordes don’t like to be kept waiting.”
Trotting after their captor, hundreds of unvoiced questions drift in the foals minds, as they blindly follow the stallion towards an unknown destination. Causing a new found fear to have entered Talvis heart, as she approached the forest. The cries of timber wolves and crackling of trees being uprooted echoed out from the dark deeps of the forest. Causing a moment of hesitation overcame the young filly as the flowery meadows gave way to the shadows of the Everfree Forest.
Countless tales from the foals parents about how forests inhabitants that dwell within its deepest darkest depths have only one soul purpose and desire in life: to kill. Drifts into the fillies mind as she entered the old pine forest. Her heart jumped into her throat as hoof drawn images by her father of the creatures of this forest flash before her eyes. Detailed pictures of rotting timber wolves, plagued bears, and countless other foul creatures that stalk shadows of the most remote parts of the forest. Causing Talvis hair on her neck to stand on end, as her mind began playing tricks on her.
An uprooted trees roots looked like the heads of snarling timberwolves, saliva dripping from its dagger like teeth to Talvi, paralyzing her with fear as she stared back into it’s glowing red eyes. Until the blood curdling cry from her brother rang through the forest, louder than the storm above. Causing Talvi whip around towards the direction her brothers cry of agony came from, and start sprinting like she had never done before, to go to her brother aid.
Branches of fallen pines scratched at her face, as she made her way through the forest. The void in her stomach steadily grew larger, and larger until her brothers screaming came to an abrupt end, causing it to expand at an accelerated rate.
“Where did she go!” The furious voice of the Elderly Stallion rang throughout throught the trees. “Stop lieing to me, and tell me where the worthless wretch ran off!”
Another blood curdling rang through the night.
“Is her life really that important to you?” The Elderly Stallion demands. “Do you truly believe she’ll come to your rescue?”
“Tavy-would-never-abandon-me,” Came the faint labored reply of Talvis brother, as Talvi herself grew closer to where her brother was being tormented.
“Then where is she?!” The Elderly Stallion roared, as yet another blood curdling scream came from Talvi’s brother, this time incredibly weaker than the last.
“Stop!” Talvi screamed her voice thick with worry, as she bursts into a clearing to find the limp form of her brother held up into the air in a decay green magic aura.
“There you are,” The Elderly Stallion snarls, dropping Talvi’s brother to the muddy ground.
“Crescent!” Vinyl screeches so loud her voice goes hoarse, as she runs up to the side of her limp brother.
“See what you caused,” The Elderly Stallion laughs, looking down at Talvi, as she shakes her brothers side desperately trying to rouse him.
“Please wake up,” Talvi whines, tears brimming up in her eyes as she starts to shake her brother violently. “Please wake up Crescent, I can’t lose you like this. Not today, not right after losing mommy and daddy!, please Crescent wake u-”
The elderly stallion delivers a swift kick to the side of Talvi’s head. “Stop whinning,” The Elderly Stallions voice comes faintly, as her world begins to spin and come in and out of focus until everything goes black.
2132369 BUCK!!!!!! Wow......you have some very serious talent, shit, I wish I could write like you, you draw people into your work with the amount of detail, I do the same but no where near the way you do.....shit, this, this was amazing, and for some reason I thought the stallion was Death himself....huh. Shit, I'm glad I followed you, now I wsih to learn in the arts of writing such as your's my friend
I've seen several "Octavia Down On Her Luck" stories, but this one seems to be the most compelling. Bravo.
On the question of believing in what others deem folly: just because there are more of them doesn't mean that they're right and I'm wrong. (I may be wrong, but I reserve the right to find this out on my own.)
My word, you sir have a talent and please pursue it. I hope you enjoy this talent, and that you won't give up on it. Even in the face of extreme negativity. Keep this up, please.
Head kinda finally starting to spin alittle after being on a boat for a few hours, whale watching... ugh, several hours later, and the rooms all moving--stop it liquid in my ears!
I'll read later--I must!
Fantasique! What more can I say? Can't wait for more
Huh....swear to the Gods I read this before.....how strange, poor Tavi, got to be so tough having to be homeless and allowing your pride to overcome your need for food, bits and shelter....damn, this is very crazy, love it though
hmm I think i know where vinyl got the box......Though I was not able to feel much of the emotion in the story but the pace felt right. As for when the uncle dropped the adoption bomb shell well Octavia just kinda shrugged it off, I mean it did not much matter how bad her relationship with her parents is...that kind of thing is gonna hurt and cut very very deep, then again..it might be like a time released deal...hell when they told me my grand father passed away when I was like 10 it took a few hours for it to sink in and I just broke down into a total mess for like the next two hours
Please have vinyl come save the day
2163993
I'm a soulless bastard. No one may see my tears, no pain, lose, or tragic event can change that.
Just wait till the next chapter.
I'm gonna make Octavia like me and keep a hold of herself until she's certain no pony is around
I did it when my grandparents and uncle kicked the bucket
Then again, she could think he's lying. We shall see
good chapter,
now update
2164049
Well I am looking forward to it
2164718
M'kay, I'll try to get it out as soon as I can!
2163993
Where do you think Vinyl got her box?
2164124
Not so sure about that good chapter part.
Now that I read over this, I keep finding parts I don't think sound right. So I guess I should go back over this and make it all pretty and shiny again.
3354848
Hi, glad you return.