• Member Since 6th Sep, 2016
  • offline last seen Sep 3rd, 2020

Doldrum of Despair

There is no hope

Comments ( 36 )

Oh sweet Overlord Baal, what did I walk into, dood?

Please give us some warning that this was vore, dood.

I literally went derp face from this.

I think I would enjoy seeing twi vore pinkie...just maybe not with her mouth...:pinkiecrazy:

never read vore before....

Sorry, I only do oral vore.

never written vore before :pinkiecrazy:

meh it was worth a shot, still I would like a tad more detail on the act of swallowing and body motion of making twi or some other pony being moved through the body. Now the talk of vore has made me remember a fic I read a while ago about ponies being made of food, like rarity was realy a marshmallow. then again twi might find ponies have different tastes literly.

Sorry I tend to ramble

I'll see what I can whip up. Like it says in the description, this entire thing was thrown together and edited in 72 hours on the prompt "The First Time"

I didn't get to do much editing until now.:pinkiehappy:

I look forward to the messy madness. I might not be able to write for crap but I still enjoy talking witht he writers.
though all in all I was not really looking for any errors, not unless they are just glaring at me. I am in it for the story more than anything

As any writer should be, but fixing up the errors is akin to putting on a nice suit. It helps to look the part.

This story is so fucked up it's actually cool.

I can see that. I look forward to your further vore works and series


me too dood, me too
i knew something was up but i would never of guessed it was this...

anyway i wonder if pinke's coltfriend liked to do it too or just bore with it

eventhough this is just something that doesnt intrest me it was still overall pretty good

My Little Fetish: Vore is Magic

Baawwww, I was hoping for Same-Size...erm, because that would totally be weird, and I would laugh at it and think you are all weirdandyeahplzdomore:raritywink:

I've read and seen a lot of vore in my time and I got a say that that was one of the best.

Same-size? Guys pls. Micro is the best vore :D.
Awesome story dude. One of the best mlp vore I've ever read. You could write sequel with Pinkie play time inside Twilight. ;)

Did anyone else yell; "O S:yay:T SON" when they read the short description and title?

3236681 looks like we share a guilty pleasure :twilightblush:

2100413 I read this out of curiosity. Vore is not usually my "thing," you see, but this was at least done well. If you make any continuation at all, I would have to suggest you have Twilight returning the favor for Pinkie, but any of the Mane 6 works.

Heck, maybe have Twilight go to speak to Celestia about this, only to find the Princess of the Sun is feeling...curious.

Bah, fine. One more TwiPie vore chapter coming up. Role Reversal style. :facehoof::pinkiecrazy:

4810697 The bronies have spoken! Long live bronyocracy!

:pinkiehappy: This makes Pinkie Happy!

Nice chapter, but there are a few things you may want to edit.

Twilight tried not to squirm, but a chuckle from lotus told her the masseuse knew what her reaction had been.

You forgot to capitalize Lotus' name.

I always enjoyed when my sister would massage me from the outside.

Shouldn't that "inside", considering the subject matter?

She turned around so her rumb was on Twilight’s chest, and she could massage Twilight’s abdomen with her hooves.

That should be "rump".

But dammit Lotus was reeeealy good at this.

And I think there should be a second "l" in the there.


Shouldn't that "inside", considering the subject matter?

No, see, Lotus was the voraphile—she was the one wanting to be eaten. i.e. the prey. Lotus would have always been on the inside, and Aloe on the outside. Thus, by massaging her own belly to enhance the experience, Aloe would be massaging Lotus from the "outside".

Thanks for the feedback though. As you can see even after extensive edits, mistakes can still be missed. The rest of the stuff you mentioned should be and has now been fixed, thanks. :pinkiesmile:

This comments section is nilarious XD

Oh and the story was pretty good too :3

This is the epitome of a fetish story. This chapter right here.

3208492 "Same-size? Guys pls. Micro is the best vore"

When it comes to soft vore I am inclined to agree with you - I prefer things to be plausible within the context of the story. Magically shrinking ponies makes more sense than them somehow being able to contain something the same size as them without having their organs crushed and bones broken.

Well that's trippy. I didn't know they could restore deleted stories like that. :rainbowhuh:

Me neither, otherwise I would have asked. Convenient though.:scootangel:

Could it have been Touch, Don't Taste? It doesn't have Rarity in it, though.

I like how Twilight actually takes a studious interest in the fetish as opposed to just being for it like pretty much every other clopfic, kudos. :twilightsmile:

Not sure what I was expecting but certainly vore was not it.

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