Pinkie Pie shows up telling me she needs my help finding the others who are lost in my world. Though what we find isnt what we expect
Chapters (4)
- Member Since 6th Feb, 2013
- offline last seen January 31st
TheNewYorkBrony
The name's Dash. (Previously Ronnie) And I write humanized pony stories. Welcome to my humble page.
TheNewYorkBrony
Joined 6th Feb, 2013 ·
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Hmmm, maybe I don't wanna be nice. Just kidding.
So your character is unexcited about Pinkie sowing up in your apartment. Don't worry, I'd flip my shit too. How would I be able to explain to my parents that a pony had literally come to life and decided to contact me. Anyway you look at it, this made me giggle. You should probably go back and proof read. There were more than a couple of capitalization things that need a fixin'.
Now time for the hard part, this story has so many variants of it that many will find it boring and won't read it. Ponies coming to the human world and helping people learn the magic of friendship is actually overdone, as well as humans going into Equestria. The most famous one is known as 'My Little Dashie' and to be truthful I didn't care for it that much.
Time for good news, you write pretty well. the character is interesting (even if it is over done) and Pinkie's character is spot on. Just the fact that Pinkie is being Pinkie makes me want to read more of it. Plus it seems like you are going to go for the 'I don't want you here' approach to the story. I still wanna see more of it just to see how it all pans out. Good luck in writing more!
Final Verdict: It's like any typical 'pony comes to our universe' story, WITH BOOBS! but it's well written...
Grammar, please. (delete comma in first one, and change the two was' to were)
"I ended up with a Bloody nose."
Damn! those Popular kids must be on Steroids.
Anyway, I like where this is going. If you know what I mean.
I favorited, please if you can Moar.
Basically my life is close to this girls think are better, I have a few friends, some ridicule me and yeah I live in a apartment, with my family.
I
Pretty good. It's a lot better than my first fic (although that's not saying much).
2085731 The name "Ronnie" is derived from Veronica -- I had a co-worker who went by Ronnie as her nick-name.
2392101
Oh. Never heard such a nickname.
...And then, I realize that Applejack has a small red ribbon, hardly noticible to the lazy people, like me.
Danny Phantom!
2085731 Im gonna go...you know, delete that.
*becomes moderator on Sylph's profile, comes on to see a story I've never seen before* Huh, well, looks like I have a few new chapters to read.
Yep, all-in-all, this is a pretty interesting story!
~Sylpheed and Eli
I just now realized how appropriate it would be for AJ to dress up as Wonder Woman.
Both are strong, use lassos, and are big on honesty.
well, i can say im most intrigued, just finished the first chapter and you're going in my watch list :3 and i hafta agree with ronnie, i think id be more than hesitant about Pinkie of all ponies just crashing into my life >.> i love her but i just dont think i could handle actually being around her for extended periods of time xD
When pinkie said:" there was a great big flash and everything just changed"
I said:"his molucules got all rearranged" and then I suddenly read you did that!!!
Danny Phantom is awesome!!!
Is Ronnie a boy or a girl, because if he's a guy then why did AJ call him a girl? And isn't ronnie a boy name?
4111326 Ronnie is me, so yeah girl. Also Ronnie is short for Veronica too
4111472 can we get more