• Member Since 28th Dec, 2012
  • offline last seen May 14th

dragonpony111


Just a man who enjoys the show (especially Derpy and Dinky) that also has a thing for writing sad/feelgood stories, usually about baby ponies.

Sequels1

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This will be a short story, around the 2000-3000 word range (edit: I lied, this will hit the 10k word mark and possibly on up to 15k as I didn't expect to do this much writing for the amount of plot I had planned in my head).

Derpy has been deemed an unfit mother, due to her mental condition, and has a real chance of losing custody of her only foal. Before that day comes though Derpy remembers how Dinky came to be, how her only source of pride and joy is tied to such a painful memory, and all of the time spent raising Dinky.

I'm writing this story in honor of a friend of mine who went through a very similar situation.

Chapters (9)
Comments ( 161 )

Awesome! 5 mustaches for you.

:moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:/:moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:

A good start... tracking to see where this goes. :ajsmug:

Hmmm...........Interesting...........will track.

*X-wing Pilot*: STAY ON TARGET..............STAY ON TARGET..........

*Fat guy who gets shot down*: I CAN'T SHAKE THE FEELS!

I get the feeling that this will eventually make me cry.

loving it so far keep up the good work oh and you said without looking bank not back.

2083592

It looks like i was right. *curls up* I feel so alone right now.

So cute and happy. I am happy for Derpy.

2085356

If you think you are crying now, just wait until the next chapter!!! Your heart will implode!!! That's right the opposite of explode!

I'm loving this... though I'm waiting for the other horseshoe to drop :fluttercry:

2086793
lol thanks but what does this saying mean?

though I'm waiting for the other horseshoe to drop

2086805
It's a play on the phrase "Waiting for the other shoe to drop" meaning if one step is a good one, the next one is going have something bad happen.

2086850

Oh I get it now, actually you hit it spot on, the good ending of the 2nd chapter is in complete opposite of how the whole story ends.

2086868

Guessing that emoticon means you are being sarcastic? btw I'm like sheldon cooper from the big bang theory, I have an extremely difficult time picking up on sarcasm.

2086683

And what scares me the most, is that I want it to.

edit: It makes me want a child of my own. *starts crying again*

*starts tearing up* please continue. please, for the love of god, don't stop.:fluttercry:

2088471

Trust me there is more to come, and to be honest I'm not even at the sad part yet.

2088969

just coming to this page makes me tear up and start to cry.

Is it because, in my heart I know what's coming?

Mental note: Support New Lunar Republic.

Damn it... people (or ponies in this case!) just can't tell when they have a good thing going... *shakes fist at Ponet*

It was so beautiful:pinkiesad2:. I love the path the story is taking. The beauty of the last moment made me happy for Derpy.

This takes place in the past. Why is twilight there?
You can cut her out and it would be fine and still make sense.

2091498

Thanks for pointing that out, I'll get right on it as soon as I get home from college.

2091498

Fixed it replaced twilight with rarity

2090837

Just to remind you most of chapter 2 and all of chapter 3 are of Derpy's memories, and most of if not all of chapter 4 will also be her memories of dinky with hopefully the story resuming by chapter 5, keep in mind that during the present time of the story Derpy will be facing a tough dilemma in 2 days..

2089103

Yeah even myself I teared up heavily after finishing chapter 3, because I exactly know what will happen in the end.

Wait, wait!! What?! Celestia rejects Derpy because of her voice? And she can't make amends for Derpy to live with him? She gave Shining and Cadence a freaking empire! This whole predicament didn't make sense to me. You A.) Rammed an entire month-long relationship down my throat, and B.) turned Celestia into an intolerant, prejudice bitch. Mm-mm. Not gonna fly with Neko-sama. Sorry, but I think I might untrack because of this.

2094329

(not trying to start an argument here, just clarifying)

This story is tagged sad, and also Derpy and Ponet were engaged for many months, almost long enough to last the pregnancy, and Celestia wasn't proud of what she said and the choice she made, I just wish I had elaborated more on that point (which I might try and go back to do), but people like what they like and I respect that.

Ah! I do see now! Well then, yes, clarification would be nice :twilightsmile:

2094215 I hope to read it soon. I am hoping for a happy ending, but happy or not, II am going to read it.:pinkiesmile:

2094438

No problem, I always love feedback and helping others with clarification of the story plot.

2094532

Thanks its rough right now but the final draft of chapter 4 should be up by midnight or definitely before 2 am my time, whatever zone that is, I live in Texas, but I'll give you a little reward for loving my story so much, the title of the next chapter. Chapter 4: My Little Dinky: Memories Are Magic

2094803 I live in Texas, too! small world. I live in Dallas.
I glad it is almost done, but take as much time as you need to work on the story. I am happy to read it when it is ready. I have about 479 read later stories to choose from, so I have plenty to read, and I will probably not run out because I keep adding stories to it. At one point I had 530 stories marked to read later.

2086868 Since Rainbow Dash is still here... It's obviously FLUTTERSHY.

For some reason, it's harder for me to cry at sad stories when incorrect punctuation is used, but I can already tell that there would be a d'aww implosion of nuclear proportions in my heart if I could read into this more easily. Really good story, the punctuation is just a little jacked up, some commas aren't put where they need to be.

2086866 Loving the story, always a fan of Derpy stuff. A couple things.

Derpy is used to giving people things but not receiving them

You should probably change that to ponies. I personally don't care, but there might be readers out there who will get all nit picky about it.

After they leave the hospital Rainbow Dash goes with Derpy back to Derpy’s house.

I think it should be back to her house. Seems a bit redundant to say she goes with Derpy back to Derpy's house.

Still a very good story. MUSTACHES! :moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:

2094794 If this is before Twilight came about, you should also exclude Spike when mentioning them running to the hospital. If this ends with Derpy losing Dinky I will be soooooooooooooooooooooooo pissed! Also, Ponet is fucking asshole! And I got that Celestia wasn't proud of not allowing Derpy to come to Canterlot, but yeah that needs a bit more elaboration because it does make her come off as a real bitch.

This is a strange writing style :rainbowderp:

You've never hears of past tense?

She bit the end of the stick and waited for her target to come round the corner. After many minutes, a rainbow maned pony appeared, carrying a basket of muffins In her mouth. This was her only chance, to soon and the projectile would fall short, to late the target would have seen it coming and dodge out of the way. NOW! The stick snapped forward, propelling a cream pie straight towards her targets face, scoring a direect hit.
"PINKIE PIE!!!" Rainbow screamed, covered in Vinilla cream and pie bits. Pinkie Pie ran for her life, Rainbow Dash close behind.

Huh I'm getting good at making stuff up on the spot, too bad I can't do that when I'm writing my own stories :rainbowderp:

2101475

Well I'm writing it as if it is currently happening, and it happened that a big chunk of this story is a flashback of Derpy remembering the days of her daughter as a filly.

2101461

Thank you so much for that comment, I honestly thought it would get a decent amount of likes and favs, but never featured or in the popular section. Also I update at weird times of the night so not many people get to see it in the updated section.

2101485 This is just too sweet a story. I came very close to tearing up. I sure hope it all ends well or I'll be all :raritydespair::fluttercry::applecry::pinkiesad2:

2102479

That largely depends on your definition of what ending well means.

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