Chapter Okay Everyone's Dead Move Along Please: Rock of Ages [Pen Stroke]
Ponemurdered XIV: Rock of Ages
By: Pen Stroke
There was no way to count all of the Star Octavias that stared down at the quartet of mares, whose life and death depended on Twilight's thin magical bubbles. There seemed to be more of them than there were stars in the sky, and yet they were all one. They were of one mind, one form, one voice except for a single mare. Octavia, the Octavia the girls had come to know and despise over their adventure, floated in the open space between them and the army, smiling smugly.
Her coat was peeling away, like the thin foil wrapping to a candy bar. Bit by bit it disappeared, revealing the sparkling undercoating of star-flesh as she moved closer to Twilight's bubbles, which condensed into a single great bubble to hold all four of the mares. “I'll admit, I was sure Luna's little trick was going to be the end of me. But, I guess her skill with her spells matches her musical talent,” Octavia joked as she reached the edge of the magical barrier. “In her attempt to stop me, she gave me the final step of my ascension. She returned me to the realm of stars that is my true home, and now Equestria, the whole world, shall join in the sweetness of The Harmony.”
Octavia placed her bow against the bubble, dragging it across the surface as she walked the circumference. The bubble's surface vibrated with a single note from the touch, and Twilight strained to maintain the spell while Rarity did all she could to wake Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie. “That's what I don't understand about you ponies. I'm going to bring Harmony to your world, to our world. Isn't that exactly what the Elements of Harmony would want?”
“You're not bringing harmony,” Twilight forced out through gritted teeth. “You’re bringing subjugation. Harmony, real harmony, is about different ponies working and living together in peace and friendship. You have to have differences to have real harmony!”
“But isn't that the greatest harmony of all. One mind, thinking and working towards a single goal?” Octavia asked. “ Well, I guess our difference in opinion won't matter for much longer. Soon, you'll see things our way... you all will.” Octavia stepped away from the bubble and moved back to her place in front of the arm. There, she turned, sat, and brought cello and bow into position. The whole army behind her did the same, each sitting on non-existent chairs and placing their bows upon the strings of their cellos. “And all it will take is a song.”
The first note came like a punch in the brain stem. True, there was no real note. In the vacuum of space, there was no air to carry the sound waves. Yet Twilight and her friends could hear the sound as if every cello being played had been jammed down their ears and into their skulls. They cried out in pain, they writhed, and covered their ears to try and stop a sound that was as painful as it was hauntingly beautiful. The bubble rippled too, affected by the magical waves put out by the Star Octavias. Its surface rippled, shook, faded, and danced the line between the life and death for not only itself but also its occupants.
The note then ended, the Star Octavias having drawn their bows the full length across the strings of their cellos. There was a pause, a moment to recover, a chance for Twilight and her friends to struggle to their hooves. And as they tried to stand Octavia's lips curled into a devilish smile as she, and the army behind her, pushed upon their bows, beginning a second note.
The sonata of suffering left the mares screaming. The notes began to come faster, an aggressive song being played by the millions of cellists who floated in space. Each drawing of the bows across strings was like a saw being drawn across the their minds. They were being carved to pieces by the quarters notes, mentally torn to ribbons by the crescendos, and stabbed in the psyche by every staccato note. It brought the four mares to tears from the sheer pain and left them writhing, unable even to comprehend the their looming demise as Twilight's bubble faded further and further.
Twilight was doing all she could to block it all out, but was a total mental overload. Her vision was blurring. She tasted blood in her mouth. Her horn ached so much she'd be willing to pop it off her head and throw it at Octavia just to make the song pause for a few seconds. She would have done anything to escape, but there was no where to go. There was nowhere to run. They had come so far, done so much to try and stop the assimilation... and it had all been too little too late. Their only friend was the vacuum of space that, like the grim reaper, offered the promise of a quick, painless end. She could release the spell and end it all. All she had to do was give up. All she had to do was admit defeat.
WHOOM
In a moment the song ended, sweet silence coming Twilight and her friends on soothing wings like the red haired goddess herself. Twilight was the first to rise shakily to her hooves. She called on her magic through her pounding headache to reinforce the bubble, and then looked to the Star Octavias to see what had happened.
Several hundred of the the star-flesh cellists had been blown out of rank and file, left spiraling in space as they chased after their bows and cellos. Those that remained were glaring, jaws clenched and eyebrows furrowed in raw anger. At first Twilight thought they were glaring at her, but that wasn't right. They were looking past her, and so Twilight turned, her jaw quickly following open in disbelief.
A vessel, as large and radiant as Canterlot, now loomed over them. A vision in white and blue, the disk shaped ship guarded the tiny bubble like it was a precious child. With a bright flash, a trio of cannons from the vessel's underside unleashed roared. Great blasts of blue raced across the emptiness of space, blasting another hole into the wall of Star Octavias.
And the second blast was all the Octavias would stand. With a chorus of battle cries the wall of Star Octavias broke apart into small sections which zipped and flew through the sky in V formations. At the same time the great white vessel unleashed it's own horde, dozens of small, chariot sized ships that raced out to meet the attacking Octavias.
The war began like a pair of great waves crashing against one another. The smaller ships unleashed small bursts of what looked to be blue magic while the Octavias played on their cellos, forming volleys of musical notes that were hurled through the air like bolts unleashed from a crossbow.
Twilight did all she could to steady her spell, to keep herself and her friends alive as the battle grew in size and intensity. Yet the fragile bubble was like a big, pink target in the center of the battlefield. Every errant shot seemed to come straight at Twilight and her friends, and she could do little to avoid the assaults. Blasts of blue energy from the friendly vessels along with quarter and eighth notes from the Octavias hammered them, bring the bubble closer and closer to failure.
The bubble's edges stretched out, growing more translucent. The air inside began to spread thin as the vacuum of space began to draw the breath from their lungs. Their visions darkened and, oddly, their bodies began to tingle. A tingle like every muscle in their body had fallen asleep in anticipation for their looming doom.
Yet, when the tingling reached it's peak, the girls suddenly found themselves whisked away from the bubble. In a blink of their eyes, the empty blackness of space and the carnage of the waging battle was replaced by sterile white walls in a brightly lit room.
“That be the first time I've ever plucked ponies out of a bubble as it was about to pop. Kind of exciting, actually,” said a pony in a red shirt. He stepped out from behind what looked like a desk with flashing lights as he wore a broad smile. “Still, since it don't look like anyone's missing any limbs, you should head up to the bridge. The captain wants ta see you.”
The ship rocked, and small alarms about the walls began to blare.
“And I wouldn't take all day about it.”
~~~
With the swoosh of doors that opened on their own, Twilight and her friends arrived at what they had been told by passing ponies was as the ship's bridge. It was a room like many others they had passed, where the desks with bright, blinking lights were operated by ponies who shouted back and forth to one another as explosions rocked the ship.
“Squadron 6 returning to bay for emergency repairs.”
“Cannon five is not responding. Attempting a hard reset.”
“Shields are at sixty percent and falling.”
It was a cacophony of sounds, alarms, and chaos, and standing in the center of it all, soaking it in as if it was the best day of his life, was Discord. He was staring at the front wall of the room, which seemed to be a window to the fight going on outside, with a smile and chuckle on his lips. The smaller ships zipped this way and that, chasing and being chased by the small squads of Star Octavias who were playing their way through space.
“Discord? What are you doing here? And what is this thing?” Twilight asked, drawing the attention of the draconequus.
“Oh, this my dear Twilight is just a little something I borrowed from the universe next door. Lovely place, has this delightful character there who I'd almost call a long lost brother. They also have these wonderful toys. As to why I'm here...” He swooped over beside Twilight, putting a paw on her shoulder as his lips spread into a manic smile. “Well, with all the chaos you've been stirring up, how couldn't I join in on the party?”
“This isn't a party!” Twilight snapped, pulling herself away. “If we don't stop the Star Octavias they're going to take over.”
“Really? I hadn't guessed that. That would explain why they started throwing magical notes like rotten fruit the night Celestia tried stand up comedy.” Discord snapped his fingers and, with a pop, returned to his place standing before the captain's chair. “In any case, I'd rather not wreck this rental or get myself Harmonied out of existence. So, first, a little care package from Canterlot.”
A snap of his claw, and Discord caused a large, blue chest to drop onto the floor in front of the mares, a chest that popped open to reveal the Elements of Harmony. Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy all smiled eagerly at the sight of the powerful artifacts, but Twilight's eyes lingered on the red lightning bolt necklace.
“But, we can't use them, we're missing—“
“Me?”
With a gasp, Twilight spun around, a disbelieving smile on her face and tears already pulling at her eyes. Standing in the doorway to the bridge was Rainbow Dash. In a flash Twilight tackled her, hugging her friend with all the strength her forelegs could muster. “Rainbow, you’re okay!”
“What, you thought a little something like that would keep me down?” she joked.
Twilight shook her head. “No, never.” Perhaps it was a lie, but she didn't care. A friend she had thought she had lost was back and—
“Ahem.”
Rainbow and Twilight both turned their heads to one side, looking into the annoyed face of Applejack who was standing just a few feet away. “Oh, Applejack, I didn't see you there.”
“No, no, it's fine,” Applejack said with a disgruntled huff. “If y'all think you can handle this without me, I'll just get on that fancy teleporter back there and go home. It's no skin of my nose. It's not like it was a pain in the flank to get here. And it's not like I was the one that remembered to bring the Elements of Harmony or anything when rainbow farts over here was ready to race out here without them. No, no... it's okay. You five have fun. I'm just going to go home and take a nap, maybe blend into the background someplace.”
Applejack turned to leave, and even got a few steps down the hall before she felt something yank her on the tail. She was pulled back into the bridge and surrounded by a group hug formed from her five friends. They squeezed her tight. “We're sorry, Applejack,” Twilight said.
Rarity nodded. “Yes, we wouldn't purposefully exclude you from anything.”
“Unless it was planning your surprise party. We'd kind of have to keep you in the dark then, but it would be so worth it because you'd be so surprised and happy and—“
Another explosion rocked the ship, causing a number of the ponies of the command deck to stumble. Fresh shouts of panic filled the air as everypony tried to figure out what had just blown up while Discord floated over to the Twilight and her friends. “Yes, it's a very touching reunion, but can you six wrap it up?” Discord asked. “There is a fight going on outside and we're about to loose the only thing keeping those Celestia flank sized musical notes from putting a lot of holes in this floating tin can.”
“Yeah, sorry,” Twilight said, her friends separating as her horn flared to life. In a moment Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Applejack were all wearing their respective Elements of Harmony. Twilight herself was about to don her own crown and begin to call on it's magic when Discord stretch his claw around her head and snatched it away.
“Hey!”
“Sorry,” Discord half-heartedly apologized, “but that rainbow light show isn't going to work against the orchestra of doom outside,” Discord said as he turned the crown over in his claw and paw. After a bit of digging, he managed to pop open a panel on the back of the crown's big, crystal centerpiece. The open panel revealed a small knob with a red arrow pointing to the word “Rainbow”. Discord took that knob and twisted it, going past the “Fiesta” and “Moon Cheese” settings before finally clicking it into a final position.
“There we go,” he said. He closed the hidden panel and tossed the crown at Twilight, landing it on her head like he was playing a carnival game. “Head up to the P deck before you activate them though. Trust me, you'll want the extra room.”
“But what did you—“ Twilight tried to ask, only for another explosion to rock the ship.
“We don't have time for questions now, Twilight,” Rainbow shouted. “Let's go!”
Twilight nodded, and soon the six ponies had galloped out of the bridge. At the same time Discord came up behind one of the ponies on the command deck, smiling as he gripped the back of her chair. “Miss Scratch, fire the bass cannons and prepare to open the P deck.”
“With pleasure, captain,” the famed DJ said as she brought a pair of headphones to her head and dropped a record on a nearby turntable.
~~~
The vessel was crumbling beneath the strength of The Harmony. It had gotten in a few good hits when it arrived, but now the vessel and it's tiny fighter ships were on the ropes. Smoke was spilling into the vacuum of space and metallic husks floated aimlessly in the void that would be their eternal grave. The robots from Luna's silly rock band had been saved and taken to the belly of the vessel, but it mattered little. Soon, Octavia would have her victory and become a full fledged member of The Harmony. She would be freed entirely of her mortal coil and join the army in its march to universal conquest.
But the interloping vessel seemed to have one final protest to make against the Octavias. After a barrage from the deep, booming cannons, the top of the vessel began to open. The plates fell back slowly, revealing a familiar bubble floating up into the open of space. Octavia dared to laugh, thinking that Twilight and her friends were surrendering themselves so the ponies on the ship might be spared, but then her happiness turned to dread at the sight of a glowing light coming from the bubble. She, herself, had never seen it before, but her instincts as member of The Harmony feared what she saw.
“Star Octavias?” Twilight's voice boomed out, echoing magically in their minds. “Are you ready to rock!?”
In a flash the Elements of Harmony took on one of their greatest forms. A stage magically manifested in the open space above Discord's vessels. Hundreds of lights in dozens of colors flared to life and towers of speakers hummed, waiting to blare with all their strength. And in the center of it all, wearing space suits and holding instruments that had formed from the Elements of Harmony themselves, were Twilight and her friends.
“Because this song is going to knock you into oblivion. Ready girls?” Twilight looked back over her shoulder. Rainbow Dash nodded, striking a ripping cord on her red, lightning bolt shaped guitar. Applejack tipped her hat as of her hooves tuned a string on her apple shaped base. Rarity gave a courtly nod from her place at trio of diamond pianos. Pinkie Pie put on her widest smile and twirled a pair of drumsticks on her hooves as she sat behind her yellow, blue, and pink colored drums. Fluttershy poked her head out from behind one of the speakers, holding the butterfly marked tambourine before shakily nodding her own head.
And then Twilight, in turn, nodded back to all of them before taking to the very center of the stage with a microphone in the shape of her Element of Magic. “Good! 1! 2! 1! 2! 3! 4!”
Rainbow Dash hit her guitar hard, the strum reverberating from the speakers on the stage not as a sound, but as a magical shockwave which rolled across the battlefield, knocking back the Star Octavias while sparing the remaining fighters from Discord's ship. From there each of Twilight's friends joined in, adding the unique voice of their instrument to the mix.
And with each note played the speakers about the stage's speakers unleashed blasts and waves of magic upon the battlefield. Dozens of Star Octavias were thrown back, sent spiraling into space. Some even burst apart into stardust, unable withstand power the mares and the Elements of Harmony were creating.
And watching aghast as the tides of battle changed was Octavia, the one Twilight and her friends had chased all the way to Canterlot's throne room. Her moment of accession, the triumph of The Melody was being undone. And as it was, a crawling sensation began to cover her body. She looked down at herself, and saw her star-flesh fading away to reveal a common, gray, earth pony coat. “No!” Octavia screamed, as if her shout alone might halt the reversal her transformation had taken. “They can't beat us. We are The Harmony! We are The Melody! Gather, sisters, and face them!”
The rallying cry drew all the remaining Star Octavia together into a single cluster, a growing mass of bows, cellos, and star sparkled bodies. They shielded themselves with their own melody, the coursing of their strings bringing a barrier up between them and the dominating rock concert that Twilight and her friends were putting on. Yet even that barrier began to fail, began to crumble under the pure power being unleashed against it with every strum of a guitar, thump of a drum, and jingle of a tambourine.
But the barrier was not meant to last. From the depths the power of the Octavias was building, fusing, and gathering. It began simply as a glow from the depths of the sphere the Star Octavias had formed, but the light grew brighter and brighter. Then, each Octavia played her cello once more, striking a single note.
And in that moment the light encompassed them all, and from the spell rose a single, gigantic Star Octavia. Her cello alone was larger that Discord's vessel, and the now colossal Octavia was done playing the instrument. Instead she gripped both hooves around its neck and lifted it above her head like a club. “You will submit to The Melody!” The colossus shouted before beginning to swing her cello.
“Not today.”
Twilight levitated her microphone up to the front of her helmet. “You want to know why?” She asked, even as the cello swung down at her and her friends. “Because we never quit. Because we never gave up. Because we kept fighting to the end.”
“Because we! Are! The! Champions!”
The spears of the stage blared with light, unleashing a torrent of magic the likes of wish the universe had never seen.
~~~
“It's good to finally be home.” Twilight said as the train pulled into the Ponyville station. She and her friends stepped off quickly, each wearing the medal they had received only a few hours before in Canterlot. From the platform they could already hear the din of the ponies shouting in celebration from the street, but they lingered in the station for just a moment.
“Yeah, it was quiet the wild ride. I still don't understand all of it myself,” Rarity said. “But we certainly do have a story to tell.”
“No doubt about that,” Applejack said. “Now, come on. There's a party out there with our names on it.”
“Oh, can we play that song again with the Elements! That would make this the best party EVER!” Pinkie Pie shouted as she bounded along side Applejack.
“Well, maybe someone else could play. I mean, I didn't mind helping save the universe, but I don't think I'd like it if I had to go on in front of other ponies,” Fluttershy said.
“Oh, I'm sure we'd all do wonderful, darling. Now come on, I think I can see some stallions who'd love to carry us on their shoulders.” Rarity said, nudging Fluttershy forward before looking back at Twilight. “Are you coming?”
“In just a minute,” she said, smiling and waving to her friends until they had left the platform. She then glanced to her side, smiling as a single figure walked out from the steam that was venting from the train. Trixie was a vision to Twilight in that moment, and the pair of mares smiled at one another as they drew closer. “There's somepony special I need to see first,” Twilight said, more to herself than anyone. She drew closer to Trixie, looking deep into those loving eyes. They leaned in close, bodies less than a breath away. Close and closer they drew—
~~~
“—, and then they kissed,” Discord said, reading the final line of the story before smiling and looking up from the manuscript. He was grinning ear to ear as he looked into the stunned faces of Twilight, Fluttershy, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and the princesses. “So, what did you all think? Now be brutally honest. You loved it, right?”
Only silence came from the eight mares.
“Oh, you loved it so much you're speechless. That really is the best compliment you could offer. Oh, I feel like I could hug you all right now. In fact, I think I will.” Discord tossed the story over his shoulder, quickly moving up to and hugging the cold, dry, and rough forms of the eight ponies. “It just means so much to me that you liked it. I mean, there were times I thought you didn't. I mean, have you seen your faces. It looks like you're screaming in terror and begging for mercy. But, no... you really did like it. After all, you'd say something if you didn't like it, right?”
Again, only silence came from the eight mares.
“Of course, you don't want to ruin the moment,” he said as he quickly returned to his seat. “Well then, let's keep this gravy train rolling. I've got another story you're just going to love. Twilight and the Meatloaf Menance. It really is one of my best works. Now, why don’t we get started?” Discord made a pair of reading glasses appear on the bridge of his nose as a new booked appeared in his claw and paw. “Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, there was a meatloaf.”
And thus the story continued, one of millions of nonsensical tales that Discord had told to the eight, statued mares as the world of wild, raw chaos raged around him. A world he had conquered so very long ago.
The End
Is it really?
Are you sure?
Are you really, really sure?
You are?
Okay, if you say so.
The End
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I'm Obselescence and I approve this message.
The eagle has landed.
We are go for pony. I repeat we are go for pony.
I am impressed, so this monster shall be read later.
My name is Magical Trevor, and I approve this fic.
I have no idea if the name is a joke on Boatmurdered, but I'll probably know if that had any impact on this.
The fun starts but never ends. This is the story of ponies and wayward friends.
2850158 Yes it is, and no it doesn't.
All your questions answered for the low low price of $9.99
this is an interesting turn of events
pinkie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/thumb/mlfw8901.gif
This will be featured.
Romance Dark Comedy Random Adventure, Teen, Gore
Sure, why not?
Liked and faved for the concept alone, this is going to be good .
im mad at myself and im mad at the authors
i havent even read the story yet lol 
1) the authors for having chapter names full of spoilers
2) MYSELF FOR READING THE CHAPTER NAMES!!
2850281
Fun fact, the chapter names do not directly correlate with the events of the chapter.
I.....I love you all. I don't actually know what else to say. What else can be said?
2850281>>2850295
Except for those two times. Doooohohohohoho
2850295>>2850310
which 2 chapters?
EGGGGSAC-wait......
2850347
I'm Dawnscroll and I approve this fic! And tentacles!
2850295
Mine most certainly does. :P
2850354
fine you wont tell me but what the heck iz that
I pass out for a few hours and I miss this.
Go figure. Reading to follow shortly.
~Skeeter the Lurker
There are no Elephants.
But is there miasma? Is the countryside scourged into a barren, charred waste? Do they pull the lever! ?
Instant favorite, lets do this shit!
Welp, that was the best thing I have ever read.
2850221
You'll have your chance at the Table, Chrome.
th09.deviantart.net/fs71/150/i/2012/064/d/9/fluttershy_wink_by_drdraze-d4ruexe.png
Eventually...
This story somehow became Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann, but with less Kamina and more Discord.
I blame Wanderer D.
2850176
Well, I suppose not everything in life can involve pissed-off pachyderms and biannual cleansing lava rinses of the country-side. Honestly, who would carry all the socks if that happened?
But then again, some things can.
Totally envisioning this when the Mane six start playing. XD
THAT EXPLAINS SO MUCH
What am i supposed to think of this .__________.
I dont need to read this to know its so full of random that it will make me laugh so much
but I will read this and I will be happy
2850413
Actually, that would be times e, or about 8.54
You had me at the DF reference.
Well. THAT was a trip.
I wonder if something like this will happen again.
And I have GOT to read this while baked off my ass.
~Skeeter The Lurker
So this story was written by most of the "popular" writers on the site...
Taken as a whole, the entire thing reminds me of an anime by Gainax, including the Or is it?! random maybe downer, maybe not ending. FLCL on steroids plus pony.
Didn't think I'd run into an exquisite corpse here o.o
The chapter names alone made me start laughing. Can't wait to read.
Why can't I hold all these Skeeter the Lurker comments
...all those wonderful authors... in one fic.
Down... braining shut...
My face already hurts from laughing, and all I read was the chapter names...I feel unprepared
2851439
Hm. Shoulda figured that.
~Skeeter The Lurker
2851156
Best cutie mark ever
Oh, Blueshift, you silly pony.
While I will maintain that the story was at its best immediately before a certain someone (*cough*Wanderer D*cough*) got his hands on it*, I do have to commend Pen Stroke for tying everything together as neatly and coherently as possible. And, of course, I also extend my compliments to all the authors who participated in putting this together. It would be fun to see (and perhaps even contribute to) more stories like this in the future...
*I would explain my position, but frankly, I don't want to start a long, drawn-out debate on this when I know (or at least suspect) that I'm in the minority in this regard. Besides, what's done is done, so there wouldn't be any point to voicing my grievances anyway.
.......oh...my...sweet...celestia....
My brain hurts...
Wanderer....it was going so beautifully...and then you happened...
Massive props to Pen Stroke for still finishing in a way that is still acceptable.
Gainax ending or no...it just makes sense that the chaos is all a story written by Discord.
What the FUCK did I just read?
I have to admit, considering this was an attempt to recreate the insanity that was Boatmurdered, they did a damn good job. I just, there are no words for the madness. This is completely insane. This is beyond insanity. Holy crap.
Wow. That ending actually made sense. In retrospect, it was probably the only thing one could do when you know literally nothing about the plot. Such as why Vinyl revives or why everyone's memory is full of more holes than a pumice rock and existence is as temporary as a backup file.
*claps*
Still a few errors here and there though. I'm sorry, I should've copied it, but now I can't find it.
Here are a few I managed to catch. There should only be one more.
ripping cord: I believe you meant "Chord"
string on her apple shaped base: I had a bit of trouble with this myself IRL. Yes, it sounds like this, but the proper term for this instrument is "bass." Yes, I agree, it's stupid.
2850413
That would be Pi times e