• Published 3rd Feb 2013
  • 437 Views, 15 Comments

Maintenance Costs - FeinesFabi



When an unknown pony is found murdered in the Ponyville hotel, Princess Celestia seeks the help of a genius detective to solve this mysterious case.

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Help From a Special Someone

The terrible sight had a great impact on the princess’s face. Her usual smile was replaced by a most shocked and worried expression. For before the alicorn lay a dead pony, in a pool of blood. But it wasn’t the fact that there was a dead pony laying in the tiny room of the small hotel of Ponyville that scared Celestia. In the many years she ruled over Equestria she had had the sad duty to bury quite a few ponies. No, it was the fact that there was a knife in the back of the corpse that troubled her. It implied that right before her was the first case of murder in hundreds of years.

Sighing she turned her gaze away from the corpse to Mayor Mare, who was standing right beside her.

“I’m afraid you were right”, Celestia said. “This young stallion was most certainly murdered.”

“But who would do such a horrible thing?” the old earth pony asked. “I’ve never heard of such a crime before.” Celestia smiled sadly.

“Well, this is what we’ll have to find out.” She turned toward the door leading Mayor Mare out of the room. “We have to find out what happened here and catch the culprit fast.” Once both ponies were out of the room, Celestia closed the door and sealed it with her magic.

“What should we tell the others?”, the Mayor asked. Celestia could hear the curious crowd rumoring outside the hotel. Although she had tried to enter the town in discrete, her arrival with the two royal guards standing before the hotel did not go by unnoticed.

“Nothing”, she replied. “Just tell them that this very hotel is off limits for the time being.”

“But they won’t be satisfied with that, my Majesty. They will ask questions.” Celestia smiled.

“I know.” with that, she stepped outside the hotel where her guards saluted. The crowd turned silent immediately as they saw the sun goddess. Celestia saw her student Twilight Sparkle coming closer. She bowed her head and started right away.

“Princess Celestia. What are you doing in Ponyville? Are you staying? In this small hotel? Why haven’t you...” Celestia raised one hoof and her student fell silent immediately.

“Excuse me my faithful student. I’ll explain it to you later.” Twilight smiled curiously. “But for now, I want you to return to your library and wait for me. I’m afraid I will once again have to ask for your help in a serious matter.” The purple mare silenced her burning questions and nodded.

“Don’t worry, Princess. You can always count on me and my friends.” Twilight could see the smile on Celestia’s face, but it wasn’t as happy and gentle as it used to be. It looked rather forced. It was then that Twilight realised that something awful must have happened. The princess took a fast look over the crowd. Twilights friends weren’t there and for some reason she liked it that way.

“Thank you, Twilight. But please don’t worry your friends for now.” The lavender mare was very surprised. Well, that’s a first, she thought. But the princess continued. “We will need the help of a very special someone. I’m going to ask for his help right now.” Celestia spread her wings and jumped gracefully in the sky. With a few swings she rose as high as the sun. And with a sudden flash of light, she was gone.


The sun goddess entered the astral planes - a place where all dimensions were one. There was no gravity, neither light nor darkness, no air to breath and no borders of any kind. Celestia had walked this timeless place only once before - in her very youth during her studies. It was here that she learned that there are many more dimension than her own. Equestria was only a tiny part of the universe. So tiny that it was almost negligible to the whole. Celestia liked that. It took a little bit of the weight of her leadership off her. Nevertheless, she didn’t enjoyed being here. So she concentrated on her mission. I have to find him quick.

She walked past many creatures of every thinkable and unthinkable dimensions. There were robotic lifeforms traversing the space in search of a mighty cube. She passed them quickly for they didn’t seem all friendly. Next she saw a planet rich of nature with most different creatures. It was ruled by humans, elves and other human like beings. I’m getting closer.

She changed her approach and didn’t traverse through the separate dimension any longer. Instead she tried to group the creatures of the different dimensions into categories. She was looking for a certain human detective. The planes changed immediately. She was now walking down a corridor like hall. In the very front stood an older man in old fashioned clothes. He was smoking a pipe and kept looking through a magnifying glass. Celestia passed him and merely returned his welcoming nod. Right behind was a little boy in a blue suit with a red bow-tie. He looked curious up to the alicorn princess and she could feel that she was being analysed. Behind him stood a man in college age who looked just like the boy. He was like an older version of the boy - but without glasses. He kindly smiled at her. Celestia returned the smile and walked by the two. And there, in a far corner of the hall she finally found the one she was looking for - Lawliet.

He was ‘sitting’ on a very old chair behind a brown desk and was watching something on multiple tv sets. Celestia approached him slowly, but he didn’t show any kind of noticing her. Or was he simply ignoring her? She reached the desk and looked down at him, but he was still ignoring her. That was a new experience for the royal mare. But she smiled and sighed once.

“L Lawliet?”, she asked. He still didn’t look up. But he raised one hand.

“Please, call me L or Ryuzaki. Names can be very dangerous”, he finally replied and then took a sip of his coffee. When he finally took a quick glimpse at his visitor, he recoiled in his chair. “A talking horse!” The princess ignored his rudeness.
“Actually, I’m a talking alicorn”, she managed to reply in her usual kind and soft voice. “My name is princess Celestia. I’m the ruler of a land called Equestria - in a dimension most different from yours.” The young detective took another sip of his coffee before he jumped out of his chair and turned his back to the princess. He walked a few steps back to the wall where a silver trolley of some sort stood.

“I suppose you don’t like coffee - being an equestrian life form and all.” he said. Celestia chuckled.

“You’re wrong. I love a cup of coffee every now and then.” L raised an eyebrow. He filled a cup of coffee for his visitor and turned around. Since he didn’t know how the princess could hold a cup with her hooves, he simply placed the cup on the desk before her. “Thanks, L”, Celestia said. She dropped two sugar cubes in the cup and took a careful sip. “Now, that’s one tasty coffee”, she complimented. L was still wondering about how she was able to hold the cup. Celestia placed the cup back on the desk and both fell silent once again. It was L who finally broke it.

“So - I suppose you didn’t came here for a cup of coffee?”. The princess cleared her throat. It was time to get to the point.

“No. I’ve come to ask for your help in a case of murder.” L tilted his head slightly. He was once again sitting on his chair with an empty expression.

“The investigation isn’t going anywhere?”, he asked matter of factly. Celestia shook her head.

“Without you, there won’t be an investigation.” He looked puzzled. “You see, we have a very low crime rate. And there hasn’t been murder for hundreds of years. The few detectiv ponies we have never had any case like this. They are usually dealing with neighborhood rowings or robberies in the worst case.” L smiled.

“Sounds like a nice place to live.” Celestia wasn’t sure if he was being serious or sarcastic.

“Yes. I guess you’d call it paradise. But...” she took another sip of coffee. L finished the sentence for her.

“...if you don’t catch the culprit, your paradise will fall apart. The longer he’s free, the more safe he’ll feel and the more likely he will repeat his crime.” Celestia nodded sadly. But L shook his head. “Sorry, princess. You’ve chosen the wrong detective.” The alicorn didn’t show any reaction to this. She merely kept her friendly expression.

“Please, explain”, she begged. L chuckled. He stared at her for a moment as if he was waiting for her to explain it herself.

“If your society has such a low crime rate as you claim, then the culprit is inexperienced and will be easy to catch for any experienced detective. I don’t want to boast or anything, but I think that your murder case won’t be any challenge for me.” He looked deep into the princess’s eyes. “It would be a waste of my time.” Celestia once again showed no reaction to that.

“Well, I think you’re judging this case too early. You see, the corpse was found in a locked room...”

“Now, I could tell you hundreds of tricks to do this right away”, L interrupted bored. Celestia nodded.

“But I don’t think that the culprit used any of them. I would bet that he used magic - which is a rather common skill in my dimension. Every unicorn has the power to do magic.” She could see the effect on L’s face.

“Magic, huh?” Celestia used her own magic to levitate her cup toward herself and took another sip of coffee. L smiled. “I see. But your magical powers must be way beyond that since you’ve been able to cross dimensions. And not for the first time, I assume.”

“You’re right. Although this is only my second visit to the astral planes” she stated. The young man tilted his head a little more.

“Why are you certain it was murder?”

“Because there’s a knife in the back of the corpse.” There was a bizarre smile on L’s face.

“Now that’s interesting. But still, I think that you’d do better with another detective. I’m sure the young Shinichi over there would take your case.” He was pointing at the little boy. Celestia shook her head.

“I’m sure he would and he may be able to solve my case. But I want you to solve it.” He was taken aback by her openness. “Not because of the case. I want you to solve it for yourself. Because my dimension has a lot to teach you.” An awkward silence followed once again.

“I’ve seen a bit of magic in my own dimension. I’ve seen notebooks that can kill. Magic is nothing I desire.” Celestia nodded.

“I wasn’t talking about something you’d call magic.”

“So what do you offer me instead? What do you think can your dimension teach me that I desire?” Celestia used her magic to turn one of the tv sets to face them. Although she hadn’t seen the images on screen, she knew exactly what he was watching. It was his own death. In an endless loop, he saw himself falling off his chair in slow motion. He saw himself crashing on the floor. The silent screams of everyone in the room. And then the body of his only friend leaning over him. He saw how the worried, shocked expression turned into a devilish smile of victory.

“You’re watching this loop over and over again, because you’re trying to understand why you failed your last case”, Celestia purported. “But the answer you’re looking for isn’t in this loop. If you solve my case, you will solve your own mystery too.” L was surprised by all the details she knew about him.

“So you know why I failed my last case?” he asked. “I hope you realise that I already knew who the culprit was when I died.”

“Yes, I know. It’s actually quite simple”, she said and leaned forward towards him. She was really close to him now. “You failed because you know nothing about the magic of friendship.” L backed away.

“Friendship? But the culprit was the only friend I ever had!”

“Exactly. And the funny thing is that you’re still calling him your friend. Now, come with me and solve my case. My most faithful student will assist you and incidentally show you what real friends are. Because, as a matter of fact, she’s studying the magic of friendship and she’s a real natural.” Celestia placed a hoof on his shoulder. “Once you know what real friends are, you will understand why you failed your case”. Lawliet slowly rose from his chair. He walked a few steps, obviously considering her offer.

“I’ll only say this one more time. You’d be better off with another detective. I’m used to operate in the background, leading police forces who get the job done. Sometimes I take risks and put others in danger - even sacrifice them. And I’m used to give orders to people”, he finished. “Do you think your student will like working with someone like me?” Celestia smiled happily.

“Oh yes, she will. Because she will heal your social awkwardness.” L took the remote from the desk and turned all his tv sets off.

“Well then, let’s go. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

Author's Note:

I hope this will be more than a "Ponified L in Equestria" story. This is my first fan fiction and the first story I write in English, which isn't my native language. Please be lenient with me and my grammar. Corrections and criticism appreciated.