The Amazingly Awesome Adventures of Tank the Tortoise (by R. Dash)

by Bradel

Chapter 3 – The League of Equestrian Defenders!

"Sooo..." Pinkie took a deep breath. "Can-I-read-it? Can-I-read-it? Can-I-read-it?"

Rainbow Dash tried to ignore Pinkie's insistent chant by browsing through the treats on display in the Cake family's bakery. In the end, though, she could only look at so many pies and cookies. It might not be as cool as a sonic rainboom, but even Dash had to admit that Pinkie's manic exuberance had a certain awesome invincibility to it. No one could hold out forever against a concerted barrage of, well, Pinkitude.

That's a good word, she thought to herself. Might wanna save that one for later.

"I dunno, Pinkie... It might not be the kind of story that you like."

Pinkie Pie blinked. "Are you kidding me? How am I not going to like a story written by one of my friends!?" And then a mischievous smile stole across her face. "Unless you're telling me," she drawled, "that it's not cool enough for somepony else to read."

Dash's head whipped around. "Of course it's cool! Cool enough for anypony to read it! You're talking to the coolest pony in all of Ponyville, aren't you!?"

Pinkie Pie smiled and held out her hoof expectantly.

"Oh fine," Rainbow Dash muttered, plucking out the pages she'd been carrying since she'd finished them last night. She held them out toward Pinkie. "But in return, you have to help me pick out the awesomest cake in the store for Scootaloo's birthday tomorrow. I'm gonna make sure that filly has the best birthday ever, Rainbow Dash style."

Pinkie Pie nodded along, though she didn't really seem to be listening anymore. She'd grabbed the pages right off of Dash's hoof and was now pouring through them.

"Did you hear me, Pinkie? I want to make sure th—"

"Ohmigosh, ohmigosh, ohmigosh! You put Gummy in your story!?" Pinkie was bouncing up and down on all four hooves now, looking ecstatic. "Dashie, you're the best!"

A grin erupted on Rainbow Dash's face. "Well, I figured I had to put Tank's frien—"

"Ohmigosh! And he sounds just like he does when he talks to me!"

Rainbow Dash opened her mouth to respond, but found herself momentarily dumbstruck. She narrowed her eyes and gave the other pony a glare. "Pinkie, Gummy can't... Oh, nevermind."

Pinkie Pie stood in silence for another two minutes, flying through the pages of the story. At the end, she spent a full minute staring at the last page. She looked unusually serious. "Ya know what this needs?" Pinkie tapped her hoof on the pages she held. "More characters." She folded the pages and held them out for Rainbow Dash.

Dash scratched at the ground with one of her hooves. "Does that mean... you didn't like it?"

"Of course I liked it, silly!" Pinkie giggled like that was the most ridiculous idea she'd heard. "But it's your first story, right? ...I think you just need to trust me on this. You need more characters."

Taking the pages back from Pinkie, Rainbow Dash gave her friend an unusually shy smile. "So it really is cool?"

Pinkie giggled again. "Yes, it's cool. Just remember to put some more characters in your next story. And maybe give 'em a bit more development." And in the blink of an eye, she was back to full Pinkitude. "Now should we find a cake for Scootaloo? I think I know one that'll be super-ooper-duper yummy!"

———————————————————————————————————

The Amazingly Awesome Adventures of Tank the Tortoise

By R. Dash

Chapter 3 – The League of Equestrian Defenders!

The secret underground hallway below the library was lit by rows of glowing blue gemstones. Tank knew the way well enough to walk it in his sleep, but he was still excited. Being called here meant there was an adventure in the making.

At the end of the hallway, two towering oak doors stood open. The interior of the room beyond was lost in shadow. Tank walked inside, already knowing what to expect.

The doors swung shut behind him and small green gems encircling the room began to glow softly, revealing a figure seated at a large mahogany desk at it's center. The figure sat with his fingers steepled before him, clicking and clacking his claws together.

"Tank, just the tortoise I wanted to see," Spike the dragon rumbled in his low, authoritative voice. "We've got a job for you. The sort of work that needs someone with your... expertise."

Tank raised his arm in a military-style salute. "Sir. I'm always happy to help the League in whatever way I'm able."

Spike nodded approvingly. "In the last few weeks we've gotten some disturbing reports from the White Tail Woods. An entire troop of Filly Scouts has gone missing. And there are rumors of a..." Spike paused for a moment, clacking his claws together dramatically. "A giant orange tower hidden away in the darkest reaches of the forest."

Tank drew an involuntary breath. "The Carrot Citadel? Does this mean Dr. Angelbunny has finally returned, then?"

"We believe so, yes." Spike let out a low, rumbling sigh. "The League has been dreading this day. You know how much it cost us to defeat him the last time he appeared. We can't afford to take the sorts of losses we took back then."

Tank the tortoise was silent for a moment, remembering the good agents that had been lost in that fateful battle. Spike, too, seemed lost in somber reflection, until a loud bark broke through the silence.

"Ah, yes," Spike's white teeth flashed in the light of the glowing emeralds. "The League wants you to take a partner for this mission. As much as we trust your abilities, Tank, if this really is Dr. Angelbunny we can't afford to take any chances."

Tank didn't protest. He didn't like having to work with a partner, but Spike was right. They couldn't risk a lone agent getting caught and being unable to report back on the situation.

"Winona is a new agent, but she's already distinguished herself as one of our hardest-working assets," Spike continued. "She's studied up on all your old missions, and she's fully briefed on everything we've been able to learn about Dr. Angelbunny since his last appearance. She has our full confidence in her ability to assist you on this mission."

A small brown-and-white dog emerged from the darkness behind the dragon and gave the tortoise a sharp salute. "Tank, sir. It is an honor to be working with an agent of your stature."

Spike cleared his throat. "There'll be time for you two to exchange pleasantries on the train to Los Pegasus. You both know how much I'm counting on you in this."

Both Tank and Winona nodded to the dragon. "We won't fail you, Spike. Let the Keepers of the Elements know they can rely on us," Tank said.

———————————————————————————————————

Rainbow Dash frowned at the page in front of her. Pinkie was right. Having more characters, and spending more time talking about them, really did make her story more awesome. But she'd put so much effort into having lots of action in the last two chapters. How could less action and more talking make her story more awesome? It didn't seem to make any sense.

Then again, what Pinkie Pie said rarely made any sense, even if it was often right.

Tank buzzed around the room while she worked, chasing a moth that must have wandered in when it saw the lights of Dash's bedroom. She'd need to read it to him and see what he thought. She hoped he'd be okay with the idea of Tank taking a partner. It was always cooler to be a loner hero working on your own, but... An image of Pinkie Pie floated into Dash's head. But sometimes working together with a partner gave the best results.

Comments

[With A Bang]

Pinkie Pie: secret author of the Daring Do series.

Yup. I'm calling it now, people.

Also, Angel Bunny as a villain makes a scary amount of sense. Just sayin'.

[Rainbow87dash]

It's evil Dr Angelbunny

I had a fun day today
First I have a flu jab
Second I have a reaction to said flu jab and nearly pass out
Third spend rest of the school day in nurses office (couldn't contact anyone in my family)
Have my sister finally drive me home
Read ponies on iPad whilst in bed
FUN!!

[Namara]

Her skills have improved

[Scyphi]

Ah, Angel as the villain. Naturally.

I'm sure Spike would love his role in RD's story. I could see him just eating up that dramatic and mysterious persona up.

[MaronaPossessed]

Awesome story so far! Wait...it's like a new story each time! Sweet!!!

[Bradel]

2041821
Thanks! I have to admit that's also one of my favorite lines. Though I think Chapter 4 will have a couple gems to compete with it. As for , I will neither confirm nor deny except to say that the subtext in her demeanor was entirely intentional.

2042241
Sorry to hear about your day, but glad I could do something to brighten it up!

[Bradel]

2041693
Actually, despite the overt Darkwing Duck allusion, 2036333 really hit it on the head. It's intentionally a bit of a Batman pastiche, but I've always thought DD was the best Batman pastiche. He's the best superhero send-up around.

2042373
She's been practicing and getting feedback! (And I wanted Spike and Angel Bunny to get their introductions in a bit more style) "Chapter 4 - Ninjas on a Train" should be a bit of a return to form, though she's past the phase of serious narrative incoherence.

[Themaskedferret]

Oh gods this is just so many kinda of hilarious and awesome words cannot express. This really does feel perfectly rainbow dash. Also grats on getting onto EQD!

[SpikeyWikey]

The Totally Tubular underTakings of Tank the Tortoise.

[Kwakerjak]

"Tank, just the tortoise I wanted to see," Spike the dragon rumbled in his low, authoritative voice.

I'm now imagining Spike being voiced by Morgan Freeman. Thank you.

[danisanerd]

That was Epic!!!!

[keaton-furman-prower]

Pinkie Pie prereading proves powerfully pwniffic! (Ain't alliteration awesome?)

Also, Angel Bunny as a villain? OMIGOSH

[Ragingturtle72]

2076156 but you cant do that because you cant have spike being the best character in the fic, its just not fair, such is the power of THE VOICE