How did you get in here, anyway?
Doctor Whooves paused to wipe the sweat off his brow. He couldn't afford to mess this up. For all he knew, failing this task would lead to the destruction of the entire town. He slid one last piece in, closed the hatch, and gave a sigh of relief. Possible crisis averted.
"Thank you for fixing my clock, Doctor Whooves." Mayor Mare said. "How much do I owe you?"
"Don' worry abou' it," Doctor Whooves mumbled from behind the disappointingly not-sonic screwdriver he was holding in his mouth. He spit it out and tried again. "Don't worry about it. I couldn't possibly charge anything for the mare that keeps our town running! Think of it as my thanks for doing such a fine job."
Mayor Mare blushed and waved her hoof. "Oh, you flatter me. Thank you, dear." Doctor Whooves just nodded and turned to walk out of the mayor's office. "Have a good day! Be safe!"
The Doctor just smiled. "What's the fun in being safe?"
---
The Doctor unlocked the door to his house in the woods. Sure, it was a little out of the way, but he liked it that way. Less ponies would notice the weekly card game he held with the king of Adipose-3.
On the outside, the Doctor's house looked well kept, with a garden full of flowers, bright paint, and a well kept lawn. Anypony who walked inside, however, would immediately realize something was wrong. The house was barely furnished, and the furniture that was there looked old and dirty. Dust was collecting in the corners, and cobwebs hung from the ceiling.
The Doctor didn't mind, however. He didn't spend any time in the house anyway. He walked through the dark hallways and dreary rooms of the house until he reached a trapdoor in the floor. He opened it up and looked down into the darkness of the cellar. The only thing that could be seen was a blue light. He descended the ladder into the dusty basement.
The Doctor let out a cough when he reached the bottom. "I really should do something about all this dust..." he muttered, looking around the basement. He raised his tie to his muzzle, using it as a crude gas mask. "All better!"
The stallion made his way to the back of the basement, where a large blue box was standing. He smiled as he rubbed the ship's wooden exterior. "Hello, sexy. I'm home."
The smile on his face dropped as he noticed that something was wrong. The door to the TARDIS was slightly ajar. "Did I forget to close you? No, I never forget to close you. How could I forget something so important? Okay, I once did forget to pick up the queen of Neighngland like I promised, but that was one time and I'm going off on a tangent now, aren't I? Hush, me, this is important! Now to find out what's going on..."
The Doctor pushed open the door to the TARDIS and wearily stepped inside. Quickly, he used his mouth to retrieve his sonic screwdriver from the hidden pocket in his collar. "Whoever's in here, show yourself!" he shouted, almost dropping his screwdriver.
The inside of the TARDIS looked untouched and pristine, in just the condition he left it in. There was no sign of any intruders, and after scanning the area with his sonic screwdriver, he deduced the that he was alone in the TARDIS. "I'd better go check in the house..." he muttered.
He turned, only to quickly stop when he bumped muzzles with a grey pegasus mare whose eyes stared in two directions. "Hi, Doctor Whooves!" she said. "I've got a package for you!"
The Doctor jumped back, letting out a rather feminine scream. "How did you get in here?" He questioned. "The door was locked!"
The mare put her hoof up to her chin. "Really? Because I just flew in. Anyway, I have a package for you, Doctor! Here!" she said, thrusting the package in the Doctor's direction.
The Doctor took the package. "Oh, good, it's those parts I ordered. But, um, why exactly were you in here in the first place?" he asked. "I'm no expert on mail delivery, well, okay, actually I am, I took a course once, but... What was I saying again? Oh yeah! Aren't you supposed to knock on the door when you have a package to deliver, not break in?"
"Well, I did, Duh!" The mare said. "But nobody answered, so I opened the door! I'm Ditzy Doo by the way, but everypony just calls me Derpy!"
Derpy flapped her wings and hovered into the TARDIS, looking around. "Wooah..." she muttered.
The Doctor grabbed for her, but missed. "Oi! Get out of there! I didn't say you could... ah, whatever..."
Derpy flew out of the TARDIS and circled it a few times, and awed look on her face. The Doctor smiled. "Go on, say it. Everypony does."
"It's... it's... it's smaller on the outside!"
The Doctor's smile fell off his face. "That's... that's not what they usually say."
Derpy continued to fly about the TARDIS, oblivious to the Doctor's reaction. "This is the coolest outhouse I've ever seen!" she cried. The Doctor just facehooved.
"It's not an outhouse, actually, it's a time machine. And a space machine. A time and space machine! The best in the universe. Maybe other universes, too, but I can't know for sure. I've only ever been to one other, and I didn't stay for long." He shuddered at the memory. "If I never see another Cybermare again, it'll be too soon."
Derpy looked down one of the hallways branching off from the interior section of the TARDIS. "Does it have a toilet?" she asked.
The Doctor nodded. "Of course it does! I wouldn't be able to live in it if it didn't have a toilet somewhere in it!"
"So it is an outhouse! A magic outhouse!"
"No!" the Doctor shouted. "It is not an outhouse! It's a TARDIS! It stands for Time And Relative Dimension In Space! It's a time machine!"
"But what if the T stood for Toilet?"
"It doesn't stand for toilet."
"Oh... does this place have muffins?"
The Doctor shook his head. "Not at the moment. Would you like to go get some?"
"I think Sugarcube Corner's closed..." Derpy said, a sad look on her face. "I hate when they close. They're the only place in town to get muffins!"
"Well..." the Doctor started. "This is a time machine."
The Time Lord trotted over to the TARDIS console and pulled a lever. "I hear there's a really good bakery on New Equestria. How about we go to the grand opening and snag a few of their famous iceberry-spacedust muffins?"
"Wow! Thanks Doctor!"
So the two got into the TARDIS, and after a brief mishap with Derpy and the TARDIS controls, they were off on their first adventure!
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I literally submitted this five minutes ago. What the hell just happened.
2026713 INSTANT APPROVAL
Well that was a fun romp.
Now please excuse me while I wipe the Coca-cola off my monitor.
Also, is this the 9th, 10th or 11th Doctor? Since they have such different personalities.
2026741
I like to think that all good Doctors are the 10th Doctor.
2026713
They streamlined the approval process, apparently, or something.
2026741
Neither, it's the pony Doctor!
2026757
Poni poni poni poni poniponiponi!
You didn't...
I like.
This made me smile. Also, I need to retrieve my mind from the gutter.
2026803
Sadly this didn't include the part where she says "Its smaller on the outside".
The way you portrayed Derpy/Ditzy reminds me of Clara Oswin Oswald.
Goody. A Doctor Who fic by you. This should be a fun romp.
Really? I find that many stories are entirely about the Doctor and Derpy meeting.
Not bad. Have a fave and a stache.
Quick! Don‘t ask questions! Just accept this review from: Authors Helping Authors
Name of Story: Get out of my TARDIS!
Grammar score out of 10: 9 I don’t think anyone’s grammar is perfect, but yours is still pretty good.
Pros:
Doctor Whooves is always welcome when it’s written well.
The Doctor was spot on.
I would rather like to see where this story could go.
Cons:
His companion is almost always Derpy. It’s become a boring cliché by now.
It felt like it could have been longer.
There isn’t really a number three…
Notes Section:
Not a whole lot to say here. For the most part, you did a good job. I don’t think I need to reiterate my pros section, now do I? BUT, I’m pretty sure you want me to talk about the cons, eh?
Too Bad.
…
Just kidding, I’ll totally elaborate.
Anyways, I shall start at the top. I understand that being the other half of what I call the “brony-made duo,” it makes sense for Derpy to be the companion. And it can still work, provided you write the story well enough. All I’m saying is it would be nice to see some other pony get to travel with the doctor. It wouldn’t have to be one of the mane six, either. It could be another background pony who was adopted by bronies, like maybe Lyra, or Vinyl. Heck, I’ll even give you a title for a Vinyl Scratch traveling with Doctor Whooves story: Wubs for the Doctor. Doesn’t that sound awesome?
(Psst. Hey, whoever is reading this. If you actually decide to use that idea, it’d be pretty awesome if you gave me a shout out for it. Just sayin‘.)
The second con isn’t really as straightforward as it sounds. What I meant was, it feels like there should be more to this story. I don’t know if there will be, so that may go away in time.
Overall, good job! You certainly earned a favorite and up vote from me!
Enjoy your review! I‘d really appreciate if you checked out my : Que Sera, Sera
I like it
Actually, it's the fifteenth since the original, so it would be new-new-new-new-new, new-new-new-new,new-new-new-new-new-new-new Equestria.
2038086
Yes, but that's a mouthful, so they just shortened it to New Equestria.
or New (15) Equestria.
2038095 media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4mw154CPr1qitwt9.gif
2036498
I like it too.
2026713 I guess everypony just like these kinds of stories
This is extremely silly.
Derpy X Doctor Hooves. My life is complete.
*looks at the chapter post dates*
I suppose the rest will be for January 2015?
Hah. I love this interaction
> Nieghngland
As pun on England, I think you have to write the "Neigh" part correctly. You switched the 'e' and the 'i'.
5126628
Shhhh that's intentional...
Now excuse me while I go edit something that TOTALLY isn't that because I don't make mistakes.
5126628
Oh, and thanks for the tip on replying, my friend! That problem could have caused some awkward or frustrating situations had it not been addressed.
5126666
The fact the chapter indication on the main listing is now a link straight to the post in the actual chapter comments makes it a lot less awkward than it was... though the notifications should really point to that link too, instead of the one on the main page view