Bad Company

by Symphony

Ch. 38 - Echoes of a Choice

Author's Note:

DOUBLE WHAMMY!

But yeah, I thought of a conversation like this between Celestia and Jay today at work and decided to churn it out as a kind-of intermission chapter.

Celestia hobbled through a hallway, a pleased smile still on her face. She had to thank Jay for that experience but it would be incredibly awkward for both of them. Luna had explained to her that Jay had not stayed around after the portal closed and walked away.

She was sure that he wouldn't leave the castle, as Strawberry was still with Luna. So, while on her way to her room to wash, Celestia kept an eye and an ear open for the human. Her goofy smile turned serious.

Jay had willingly sacrificed his last chance to go home, just so he could stay behind and aid in closing the connection between the two worlds. For Celestia, it spoke in depth about the character hiding inside the human, covered by his impulses and often rude mannerisms. Sure, he could go very far to prove a point but in the end, he gave up his home and his family just so that no one, human or pony, would be put in the same situation as him.

As she passed a window, her eyes were drawn to a balcony on another wing of the castle. She saw the familiar shape of Jay sitting down with his legs crossed. He suddenly stood up and walked toward the railing and leaned forward, staring straight down. He backed away and ran both of his hands over his face.

A sense of unease wracked through Celestia and focusing her magic, she vanished in a pop of golden magic. Once her sight returned, she found herself standing a fair distance away from him. Jay had turned to her with wide eyes, a hand on his chest and gasping for air.

“Please stop doing that, or at least give me some kinda warning...” He said after composing.

“I walked past and saw you here and Luna told me that you were going for a walk.” Celestia said, approaching him. Jay sat back down on the balcony and rested his chin on a closed fist. She sat down beside him and he scooched away from her a little.

“I told them that I wanted to be alone for a bit...” He grumbled. Celestia sighed and tilted her head toward him.

"Your decision was incredibly unselfish, you put the greater good as your first priority instead of leaving it at that." Celestia shook her head. "It takes a lot to do that, believe me, I know..."

“I guess...” Jay groaned. “Being the head of a country makes your choices limited. I get that.” Jay moved his hand from his face and to the floor behind him, leaning back on his arms and looking up at the sky.

“Did you know that...” Celestia bit her lip. “I once had to banish Luna to the moon to save Equestria as a whole?”

Jay went completely quiet. “...Wow, how long was she gone? Ten years? Twenty?”

Celestia blinked and turned to him with a frown. “Jay... Haven't anypony told you how old my sister and I am?” He shook his head no and turned his head to her. “Well, go ahead and guess. I won't be offended.”

Jay pursed his lips and they became a very thin line. He coughed in his elbow before answering. “Uh... You look kinda young, you don't look like you're some old lady... So... what, fourty? Fifty?”

Celestia felt a warmth spread on her cheeks and she giggled. “No, you're very far off.” Once her giggling finished, she smiled. “I am just about one thousand, nine hundred years old. Luna is seven years younger than me.”

Jay's face morphed into a deadpan. “You're shitting me, aren't you?” She shook her head. “Alright then... How?”

“I'm an alicorn, once I came of age the sun itself was bonded to me as I took over the duties of my mother.” She had to fight back another giggle at the face Jay was making. “Luna is connected to the moon, continuing the legacy of our father.”

“That's... really weird...” Jay frowned. “So, how long was she banished then?”

The joy on Celestia's face diminished and a melancholy look crossed her features. “...A thousand years.”

Jay's eyes nearly bugged out of his head. “Holy fuck...” He breathed out. He was at a loss for words and scratched his left arm. “How did you deal with it?”

Celestia sighed. “...I was lucky that I had a lot of friends with me, I had my duties to attend to but the guilt of banishing her has never left me.” She wiped her eyes with a hoof. “At first I felt like giving up but I couldn't. Ponies depended on me to lead them through this.”

“Shit, I don't even know how to respond to that...” He crossed his arms and leaned forward.

“Don't give up, I know that it will hurt and it's only the beginning.” Celestia closed her eyes. “But please, never give up on your will to keep going...”

Jay stood up. “Of course I won't fuckin' give up!” He nearly shouted at her as he started pacing back and forth in front of her. “Back in high school, there was a girl I knew who was really down in the dumps.” He stopped in front of Celestia and leaned forward. “Wanna know what I told her?”

Surprised by his sudden closeness, she nodded.

“Dying is easy. Living is the hard part.”

To prove a point, Jay climbed up on the railing of the balcony and balanced there, still staring at Celestia. “See, if I stand here like this I'm a mistake away from falling.”

To Celestia's shock, he raised a foot from the railing and started balancing.

“The only thing keeping me from falling right now is my balance, and my will not to fall.” Beginning to tilt back a little, he continued. “It would be easy for me to let go.”

Celestia grabbed him with her magic and levitated him back on the balcony floor. “See what I mean? I have a life worth living, I'm not gonna waste it away cause I feel like a human piece of shit. Everyone has bad days, no matter who you are.”

“Besides...” He shrugged. “It's not a high drop from here. I'd probably survive, but Strawberry would be the one killing me.”

“I felt like you were trying to give me an actual heart attack with that stunt...” Celestia relaxed once he was on solid ground.

“Payback.” He grinned. “Alright, let's go back to the others. I hope you still have some meat in the kitchen, 'cause I'm fuckin' starving!”

Jay walked past her in rushed steps and kicked the door back into the castle, scaring the daylights out of a maid that had just walked past it. He apologized and started walking away in the wrong direction, whistling a tune.

Celestia shook her head and chuckled, then wiped some sweat off her brow. “That's the first time in recent years anyone said I looked that young...” She mumbled. “Do I really look that old to everypony else..?”

Whatever, she had to go and get Jay on the right path before he got lost and get her cooks to make a meat dish for dinner for her guest.

Comments

[killergoonie]

I don't know how anyone could think Celestia look old. Guess knowing how old she really is would skewer your vision of her. I really liked seeing Jay's conviction to his choice and to live, inspirational even.

[Kosmosu]

Really awesome couple of chapters. They were good on the heartstrings.