Thomas Kirby is a normal teen who likes My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, the fanbase of it, and writing. Except he now finds himself as a unicorn in the pony world. His insanity, and the knowledge of the world and its people, doesn't allow him to fit in. His compromise? Be the nobody that delivers strange books written by some xCrossx. But will the isolation be endurable? Or will this insane author fall over the dreaded edge?
Rated Teen for language, sexual themes, dark themes, and warping of canon.
Chapters (2)
I do need a good piece of artwork for this. Anything temporary would do fine, too. Just PM me suggested pictures and I will look into them.
Hmm... your avatar...
*cough cough*
Uh... yeah, it's alright so far... I'ma track it now.
Brony in Equestria, improper grammar, rainbow of tags, and a username that's physically painful to look at. NO.png
2052620 Improper grammar? Um, you must be kidding. And the tags aren't random. It's got a dark tone, it has plenty of joking and randomness, it's in Equestria so of course it's an adventure, it's not canon when humans don't even exist, and there is a human who turns pony. This isn't like your normal "human in Equestria and is a human and is best buds with everypony you can name plus a ton of OCs", it's a "I'm a human in this canon-following world turned pony who could ruin everything... I can't be somepony to anypony."
2052353 What about my picture? It's Insane Pinkie gripping a pillow.
2052620 And how is the username painful to look at? It's just a name, "Sagacity".
So far, the second chapter is uneventful. The first chapter was incredibly unnecessary as it was just one sentence. I'm not sure what you're trying to go for here as an adventure story, because this is starting at as a beginning for a Slice of Life story.
2053131 The first chapter isn't a chapter, hence it's title, "Part 1: Books". The line was just something to go with the title of the part, a subtitle if you will. It should be self evident. And, life doesn't have all that is in store. One single chapter doesn't dictate an entire story.
2053265 That is impossible because I am CURRENTLY on a school computer, and I'm sure you can see the hundreds of issues there, and I am busy writing more of the story, which I then have to type up into FiMFiction, which doesn't have any sort of checking system.
2053265 And be happy with this. This is my second writing of the chapter; the first one was recycled since I typed it up and the digital was lost when I switched the order of the Part declarer and the chapter itself due to stupid school computers. The original was 860~ words and not so detailed and more rushed. This one is very detailed, 120% better (for 220%), and the pacing is smoothed until the very end, when I was just wanting to finish it before class actually ended.
2053147
Well thank you for clarifying that, although I still find that to be unneeded. You could just stick all that at the top of the actual chapter, and separate it with [hr ].
Anyway, Human in Equestria stories are not really my favorite cup of tea. Only a few good ones popped up for me, and I just don't find yours to be exactly within my liking.
I do wish you luck on getting some readers though.
I'll see you later.
This is arguable the most overdone plot type in the whole of FIMfiction.
2055326 Plot type? You mean HiE? Well, no, there are probably more Changelings out there, to be honest. And this isn't the usual "human comes in as human and tromps through as a friend or some asshole", this is a different "human becomes pony and hides away a bit while doing some crazy shit."
This chapter should probably be taken down, it's not very relevant.