Vinyl has been acting strange. The famous DJ PON-3 going on long walks outside Manehatten--in Nature?! She's a night-life pony; why is she now spending her nights alone under the stars? And what are the strange sounds coming from the forest where she wanders? Octavia is very suspicious of her flatmate's strange new behaviour.
(A short two-part fic.
The First: Octavia's Suspicions
The Second: Vinyl Scratch's Reveal)
(Joke) Alt. Title: Vinyl Scratch Visits Stonehenge
2030960 um, but she doesn't
2031295
Yes, but one of the many secrets of the Earth is that Stonehenge is actually a giant amp. I have to thank Nigel Tufnel for that bit of info.
2031308Really?! cooool
There are a lot of typos and wrong words, and the formatting is bad in a few places. Overall, it has some potential, but it could use a lot of cleanup and some expansion to get there.
permission
tiring
May want to cut this down to just a couple of those. Up to you.
Also, in the description, you misspelled "suspicion".
Good story so far. Can't wait for the next half. Keep it up.
2031536 Corrected! Thanks, by the way! (My comp has spell check turned off, cuz my litttle brother does coding on it. It makes it harder to find typos.)
2031516 Please, examples
2031612
Syvvak hit one or two, but you also used 'mist' instead of 'midst' as just one example. It's the kind of thing you are best served figuring out either on your own or with the help or a friend / editor.
Also, the series of quotes from other ponies is one of the spots with very bad formatting, and the end is... Eh. Abrupt and uninteresting. It needs work, but there -is- potential here.
2031630Okie dokie, thank you!
Yeah, I was unsure for the quotes, for I've seen both it formatted as I have it, and as a new paragraph for each quote.
Yeah, the ending is abrupt, but that's best left to being explained by Vinyl Scratch, not Octavia.
i like it, i shall await the next chapter in this with much eagarity
2031308
why am i only just learning this??!?!?!?!!
*packs bags for england*
later pony-bros
*10 hours later*
lies, all lies
how could you get my hopes up like that, gamer?
i thought we were friends
2032068
Admittedly, I only became friends with you because of your avatar.
2032092
FEEL THE D'AWWS
2032249>>2032092 *glances at own avatar to the left* My face right now.
Thank you very much, by the way, stiggerzz
2033928
ey, no problemo muchacho
O I am loving this! There are a lot of typos and such, but I don't really mind em. The story is great so far and I'm really sad to see that there will only be one more part. I could defenitely get on track with this becoming a 40k words story
2048399My, high praise for me, indeed. Thank you!I am very glad you love it!!
Yeah, and, perhaps sorry to say for expectations, the story was planned to be a short one-shot anyway, so the second part may only be just as long as the first,--but, I'm not sure: I've only just started writting it, with only about 300 words so far (and i would be writting more right now, but, alas, my bird is tweeting alot and is rather distracting). But we shall see in the end where Vinyl takes it (I need more things to work off for her lexicon, like I had for Octavia: Herman Melville). I'm not sure, with time to actually write in peace, when I'll have the second part up, but you'll be the first to know when I do
Don't worry, I plan more Vinyl and Tavi There will be portions dedicated to Tavi in my story: The Great Filly Violin Prodigy, if only for juxoposition, perhaps, but it'll be there! And for Vinyl Scratch...
2048399Oh, by the by, what kind of typos?
2048468
Not sure all are important or even necessary. I felt like giving you a few examples and taking time to reread your story two more times since you were kind enough to reply with quite the long message
I can't wait to see what other stories you plan on writing, and if you aim for more octyscratch goodness, then I will read the living shit outta them :D unless they're tragedy-sad stories, cuz those fucking break my heart 3 times before they violate my brain... Or it's cuz I'm a giant pussy
as an australian, this is gonna bug me persistantly unless i say something
proper spelling is "Didgeridoo"
'part from that, the story was good, i enjoyed it.
kinda an abrupt ending, but not so abrupt i don't feel the need to complain about it
just had to mention it
2166316 I've seen it spelled both ways, and just decided to go with this one as it seemed more Aboriginal
If you really think I should change it, I can
Don't mean to justify but: Kawabata!
bookpeopleblog.files.wordpress.com/2010/06/kawabata.jpg
2166316 By the way: you didn't fav before!!!!!
Just kidding, Love ya mate! And humble gratitudes from a meagre member of thy moltly crew!
2166587
ah, if you've seen it spelled both ways and you prefer this one, by all means
all the best to you
4.bp.blogspot.com/-OST3resAiUI/UBZJBiDsnUI/AAAAAAAAnBo/dANAgF7bUAo/s1600/Bowing+Man.jpg
2167900
fc01.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2010/188/4/f/Aang_and_Sokka_Bow_by_vamcatblaze123.gif
2167998
oh my go-
this should be our traditional greeting
2168030 YES!
waithow do you mean "traditional greeting"
2168053
you know how some society's have a special handshake?
and some organisations have like, a chant of something?
well, the motley crew will bow until we hit eachother in the head and fall over backwards
2168107
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw831_large.jpg
2168136
no one ever said the crew had to be normal
i mean....it IS led by me
2168164What fun is there if it's normal?
I'm just imagining us meeting up in real life somewhere, maybe at a brony-con, or wherever, then we do our greeting---
online, we just post that pic
2168188
lol, i just got this mental image of a 17 year old aussie and a whatever-the-hell-you-are, bowing into eachothers heads right in the middle of a crowd of bronies
epic image was epic
but yes, what fun is there if we are normal?
2168226 21 year old Citizen of the World--or an American living in Southern California, specifically, in San Marcos--I ain't afraid of giving my location away
2168226I don't know how I should respond to the epicness, so here's Mozart laughing his ass off:
2168289
and now i know what-the-hell you are
img.photobucket.com/albums/v23/woody302/murica_zpsba40d50d.png
EDIT: "aint afraid of giving location"
next step is to reveal your identity
2168298
mozart?
why not OG Joker?
mark hamill ftw
2168302 Yup!
Not really. Judging by your own pic, I have about the same build as you(?) I wish I had a camera to just show you, but, eh... one day.
Nicholas! but you already knew that--remember me saying that Nicolas Cage stole my name and left me with the "h"? but i haven't a facebook, so you can no stalk me
And where do you live, senor nameless?
2168374
fear not, i haz facebook but i no use it
i've been meaning to cancel it....fb just doesn't appeal to me for some reason
i can tell you where i live
Bunbury, Australia
my name however is confident- joke, it's max
2168389 Bonjour, Max--hm, you're in the San Marcos of Australia--relationaly, that is. Is it nice there? It looks alot nicer than here. Hey, you even have a nice house
I actually live in a part of san marcos called san elijo. So you can get a better idea of what I see on a daily basis--nothing like your views, apparently
2168434
u dun googled mah town
ARE YOU A SPY?
eh...it's alright, not what i would call a prime tourist destination.
ho-....how did you find my-
no..don't question pinkie pie, max.....you'll only give yourself a headache
2168461Nyope, wasn't Pinkie who found you this time:
absoluteanime.com/detective_conan/jimmy.jpg
(actually... I look a surprising amount like Jimmy... 'cept, I have brown eyes... and I'm half Irish, quarter mexican, and some french or something and I'm not an anime)
I don't think I could have guessed a didgeridoo to be the reason for so much change, but I enjoyed the story. Up until this point, I had never heard a didgeridoo. I knew they existed, I just hadn't heard one. Hearing a didgeridoo adds extra depth to the story and it may make more sense to the readers that questioned the didgeridoo. Great story.
2168461 Far better tourist destination than here.... but, then again, we do have near here: Sea World, the San Diego Zoo, and the Wild Animal Park (now called the "Safari Park")....
2168506
trust me, you haven't heard a didgeridoo, until you've heard a bunch of them being played at once in a performance
it sound.....amazing
have my words as a australian
2168502
link broke
2168506 I'M SO GLAD YOU ENJOYED!!!Thank you!!
Well, the Didgeridoo helped her grow as an awesome lover of music, and did create change, but there was also something else I was kinda hinting at, that doesn't necessarily have great meaning to this story in particular, and that is what my penname means. Search it up all together on google, separating the words, of course, if you're interested
2168575You've heard them in concert? I've only heard that on the comp, not being in Australia
Just, google Jimmy Kudo
2168575I wonder if I can upload a vid of me playing my Didgeridoo from my phone? Though, I couldn't afford a real one, so I had to settle for a well-enough-quality PVC--but it's still shit to the real thing, I know... Don't know if I can or when, but I'll let y'all know within the week, probably
2168607
buskers in the street, when i was visiting sydney, there were two aborigines playing didgeridoos to promote their CD
i tell ya, recordings have nothing on IRL
Great story. I so called it <_< >_> <_<. It was wonderful. Just that perfect slice of life feel to it. Good job. Hope you do more with this (SHIP). Take my star and eye.
2170234 Thank you very much for, not just the like and fav and comment, but the follow!
Shipping is definitely something I've been keeping in mind. I'm thinking of having a little bit of Octascratch--Taviscratch?--suggested, perhaps, in my other story, The Great Filly Violin Prodigy at some point.... but I'm also thinking of writing a story focused on them shipped chiefly. For now though, I wanna work on (when I can between school and reading Tolstoy), and soon begin submitting on here, my Apple Pie ship--so many cute and fun ideas have I! So, if you like Apple Pie
(well, darn! I can't find the one without the weird color background, so this'll have to do)
fc00.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2012/237/7/c/mlp_applepie__by_mlpextreme-d5cddbl.jpg
Love It!!! Didjeridus for the YES!!! She also likes accordians!
i wub this