The Dying
Rainbow sat up in the small crater she had formed when she crash landed and tentatively stretched her wings. Her left one moved fine, but when she tried to move her right one a wave of pain spread out across her back, causing her to fall back down in pain. After gritting her teeth and getting to her feet, Rainbow looked around. The first thing that went through her head was she was defiantly not in the Wonderbolts stadium anymore.
The second thought she had was something along the lines of; ohmygoshI’mnotintheWonderboltsstadiumIhopeIdidn’tfailthetest. She paniced quickly before she managed to calm herself down slightly, and have another look around. The surrounding landscape didn’t look like anything she had seen in Equestria before, in fact, the only time she had heard about somewhere like this was in her Daring Do books.
Rainbow looked around for a bit longer before deciding that she should probably get up and look around her surroundings. It was then she saw something moving inbetween some of the trees. As she got closer, she could see it was a strange creature, about the size of Big Mac, with two claws instead of front legs. It had a shell of pure black, and the only way Rainbow had managed to see it was by its piercing yellow eyes. Slowly, the creature came towards Rainbow, and, instinctively, she backed away from it. As the creature emerged into the light Rainbow got a better look at it. It had a small tail, not unlike that of a dragon, but what really frightened Rainbow was its head. Its two piercing yellow eyes stared at her, while a gaping maw filled with jagged teeth stretched wide. The whole thing reminded Rainbow a bit too much of the Changelings that had attacked Canterlot a few years ago.
Rainbow began to back away faster, but lost her footing as she stepped back into the crater she had made when she had crashed. She tumbled to the bottom and landed in a heap, causing her right wing to erupt into pain once again. The creature roared, and jumped into the air, bringing its claws down, Rainbow screamed and closed her eyes, waiting for the end.
It never came. What did come however was a warm rush of liquid and a heavy weight on her body. As she opened her eyes she saw the creature lying on her chest with a hole in the side of its head. She also saw blood. Lots of blood. Rainbow was about to scream again, but before she could a wingless dragon appeared in her view. What was stranger however was the odd Biped riding the dragon. From what she could see from under the creature’s body, it had a very strange, angular face with no fur on it, although it did have a large top knot and pony tail on the top of its head.
The thing looked down at Rainbow, and jumped off the Dragon and advanced towards her. She gave a loud Fluttershy-esk “EEP” and promptly fainted.
***
Elarique looked down at the small creature in the crated that had just fainted. He had never seen anything quite like it, although it did remind him of pictures of the ancient Eldar Horse’s he had seen. But they had all been much larger than this, and had certainly never had such a bright coat. Elarique decided to pay the creature no heed, and headed over to the Rock in the middle of the clearing. Elarique carefully removed his pressurised glove from his right hand, and laid it upon the World Spirit. Opening his mind, he felt his way through the infinity circuit and ascertained that no damage had been done to it so far.
A sudden roar brought Elarique out of his trance, and he looked round to see a trio of warriors beasts enter the clearing. Knowing he wouldn’t survive long against them, Elarique rushed back to his mount, suddenly though, he turned and looked back at the ball of fur in the crater. It looked so innocent, and so different. Quickly Elarique made the decision to take the creature with him. Scooping the unconscious form of Rainbow Dash up from the crater he dived onto his mount and sped away from the encroaching beasts, and hurried to get back to his village.
***
Rainbow awoke with a start, quickly looking around again, she saw she was no longer outside, but rather in a building of sorts. She did not have long to look around however, as a strange Cat like thing walked into the room, followed closely by the strange Biped she had seen earlier. The cat hissed at Rainbow, who noticed how large it was, and looked as if it was getting ready to pounce.
“Peace Hrythar” the biped spoke, in a soft yet commanding voice.
The cat seemed to understand the biped, and quickly stopped its hissing.
“What are you little creature” the biped mused, saying it not as a question, but more a statement to himself, Rainbow assumed it was a boy from its build and voice, as if he didn’t expect Rainbow to speak.
“I’m a pony, well, a Pegausus” Rainbow piped up hesitantly.
“You talk?” The creature asked, visibly taking a step backwards in shock.
“Well duh.” Rainbow said, looking at the creature strangely, “Everypony in the..world..can…talk.” Rainbow trailed off as the realisation of what this meant hit her like one of AJ’s bucks.
“I was not expecting this when I went out to the world spirit” the biped mused quietly, “my name is Elarique, do you have a name pony?”
“I’m Rainbow Dash, fastest flyer in all of Equestria” Rainbow stated, jumping on top of the covers and puffing her chest out.
“Where” asked Elarique, looking confused. “Equestria? As in the Mon-keigh word for horse?”
“Equestria, although I the actual planet is called Equis” Rainbow stated
“Equis” Elarique muttered to himself, “who named this place? A female human?”
“Well if we’re not on Equis where are we?” Rainbow asked, tentatively.
“We are on Hannibal, an Eldar Exodite world under the protection of Saim-Hann craftworld” Elarique stated, as if this should mean something to Rainbow.
“A what world?” Rainbow asked
“An Eldar planet, do you even know what an Eldar is?” Elarique asked tentatively.
“Nope, although you do seem similar to those Hu-mans Lyra is always going on about, but their just a silly fillies story” Rainbow said.
“WE ARE NOT HUMANS” Elarique roared suddenly, surprising Rainbow and causing the cat to hiss again.
“Sorry, I was just saying that the closest I’ve ever come to seeing a human, or any biped, except Spike.” Rainbow said apologetically.
“I am sorry, you did not know” Elarique said, going back to the smooth voice he had held before. “Ask the questions on your mind, and I will do my best to answer them”
“Well OK.” Rainbow said.
Twilight would love this, Rainbow thought, at the thought of her friends a tear crept to her eyes and she fought to keep it from falling, but failed. A fact noticed by Elarique.
“Have I offended you?” The Eldar asked
“No, I was just thinking about my friends, I’m probably never going to see them again, am I?” Rainbow asked Elarique.
“Tomorrow we will discuss such things, but now I will answer one question.” Elarique stated simply.
“Ok then, what exactly is an Eldar?” Rainbow asked inquisitively.
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Nice to know I'm inspiring folks. First things first, though. In the description
should be
Okay, now I've read it. It seems a little rushed in places. There are instances of incorrect or missing grammar, and a few missed capitalisations. Nothing glaring, just noticeable. And did you copy me with the cake thing?
I can see why you chose Eldar, what with WH40K's humans being all "Burn the heretic. Kill the mutant. Purge the unclean", and their reaction to what is clearly a Xeno would not end well for Dash. Unfortunately, I don't know much more in terms of WH40K's lore.
Thumbs up and a follow for now. Keep it up.
Is that a Swooping Hawk?
Hmm... The Eldar are renowned for their arrogance and self-importance, despite said faults directly causing the birth of Slaanesh so I wonder how Dashie's gonna cope? Regardless, I like the idea of 40K/FIM crossovers. Gonna start reading now.
2005783
Yes I did get the cake thing from you, I thought is was a good idea, and does seem to be something Pinkie would do.
2006220
Yes it is a Swooping Hawk.
Wait, Tyranids? All the races in the Warhammer universe and the planet's threatened by the only one that cannot be negotiated with? The one what's sudden appearance forged an alliance between Space Marines and Necrons?
If it wasn't predetermined, I'd honestly be concerned for Dashies wellbeing. Eager to see how she ends up finding a place among the arrogant space Elves.
This is a great story ya have here mate. Hope to see more soon.
we seeth what thou hath performed there.
great work, can you perhaps, continue?
2007101
Why not Tau? They tend to be the most tolerant of Xenos. More so than the arrogant Eldar.
This... ugh. The grammar is just so awkward. Technically I wouldn't say "wrong" (even though it has its errors) which is why I call it awkward, but still, I can't read any more. No, nope, gave it a shot, read more than the first chapter, still not amazing enough to move beyond the language. Before I "leave", the two things I noticed the most was the lack of... uh, I forgot what it's called, but words like "and", "then", "of", etc etc, and a little disuse of commas and periods. I do however feel confident in saying the idea is awesome, and sometimes that's enough for me to like a story (even love, as in the case of The Black Knight), but not this time.
The FEELS!
THEY...they....DON'T EXIST AT ALL.
Why can she speak their language?
Wow i'm already loving this so far
causing her right wing to irrupt into pain once again
of the ancient Eldar horse’s he had seen
A Sudden roar brought
1. Erupt.
2. Horses, in this case.
3. Extra capitalisation.
4247367
The Tardis can do amazing feats...
Oy, that was awkward....
I can't even read these comments lol, I feel like I'm the only one out of the loop on this stories origins. idk about anyone else but I'm reading this story because I found it on fimfiction and it sounded interesting, everybody else seems to know what it's crossed over with and are reading it with a lot more info than I am.
The story writing seems rushed and lack of any proof reading is appalling and bars me from reading any further lest I get too irritated again. Discontinued, ta-ta.
11635729
Too bad, this is the authors early work and the story blooms into something great. Also the grammar does improve later.