Ascendant Shadows 13
The Commander’s spell had transformed Maresidian Fields into a charnel house. Burned skeletons dressed in the scorched remnants of their armor covered the blackened plains, and the stench of charred flesh assaulted my nostrils with every step.
Perhaps I should have turned my back on the spectacle instead of immersing myself in it. Howe’er, the Commander was doing much the same as I, her eyes drinking in every horror she had wrought. The pain upon her countenance was easy to see, but that was precisely why she was here. ‘Twas she who had unleashed this devastation, and anypony who could wield such power should do so with keen understanding of the consequences for doing so. Sunbeam stood at her side, scowling when she spotted tears in the Commander’s eyes.
We had found precious few survivors so far. Some of the earth ponies had been close enough to the dried up river to take cover within its banks, and others had simply been fortunate and avoided the worst of the blast through happenstance. Our chirurgeons saw to everyone we found. The rebel army had already been destroyed; now was the time for mercy.
My squire slowly trotted towards me, stepping gingerly around the fallen. She had rather prudently covered her nose with a handkerchief to combat the smell. Judging by the grimace on her lips, ‘twas only partially successful. Still, she was reluctant to remove it in order to speak. “Milady, the soldiers have found a body, and one of the Magi just confirmed that it is Steel’s. I thought you would want to know.”
I took a deep breath, then slowly nodded. “I did. My thanks to thee, White.” Part of me had hoped that he might have survived through some miracle, but that had been a foolish dream. Nothing could have survived the horror Sunbeam and the Commander had wrought.
‘Twas curious to walk upon the charred fields. Battlefields always had an eerie stillness to them once the battle itself was done, the silence that comes in the wake of war and death seeming deafening by comparison. But this ... this was no battlefield. There had been no glory or honor found at Maresidian Fields. Only fire, death, and the hope that what we had done would finally put an end to the madness our civil war had unleashed upon the world.
White grimaced as she followed my gaze, looking out o’er the blasted landscape. “I have heard it said that bards were already preparing new songs to commemorate your victory against the Avatar, milady. I do not think any of them will want to celebrate this.” (1)
1: Only one known song was composed about the event at Maresidian Fields in Shadow’s lifetime, and “The Field of Flame” was far more along the lines of a lament than a celebration. Sunbeam Sparkle was rumored to be quite fond of having it performed when she felt the need to make a point to her political opponents.
“I would prefer that they did not.” A part of me hoped that we could completely forget about what had happened here, though I knew that would not be the best way to address it. Such things should ne’er be forgotten, else they might happen again. Far wiser to remember what we had done, and the terrible consequences of it. Only a coward refuses to face the reality of their own actions, and so long as the world remembers the terrible price of war, we would be unlikely to find ourselves paying it again.
My eyes once more drifted to Sunbeam and the Commander. Sunbeam had taken her aside, and though I could not hear her words the tension in her shoulders and the scowl upon her lips made it easy enough to guess. The Commander responded with something short and sharp before abruptly turning her back on her advisor and stomping towards her tent. Predictably, Sunbeam followed in her wake to continue the discussion.
I judged it prudent to follow the two of them. ‘Twould be far from the first time they had quarrelled, and in the aftermath of the destruction on the Fields, the Commander’s temper would doubtless be far more frayed than usual. Thankfully one of them had been prudent enough to erect a privacy spell, though the relieved looks the royal guards directed at me ere I entered her tent made it clear that they knew what was transpiring.
I entered the tent to find the Commander in the midst of opening a bottle of wine. As soon as the cork came out, my nostrils were assaulted by the smell of old and especially potent alcohol. While I paused to take stock of the situation, Sunbeam scoffed contemptuously, her attention so focused on the Commander that she did not e’en notice me. “Oh yes, Majesty, I am sure that will solve all your problems.”
The Commander closed her eyes and took a deep breath, then deliberately poured herself a large drink. “Sunbeam, I have had a very long and very trying day. I would like the peace to find what solace I can in privacy, preferably without any further ... commentary from thee.”
Sunbeam’s eyes narrowed. “You will find no solace in the bottom of a bottle. There is nothing to be found there but weakness and failure, not to mention the spectacle of a drunken sot of a queen at a time when the army needs to see its ruler standing strong.”
The Commander whirled upon her with a furious glare. “I have burnt an entire army to cinders. Thousands lie dead by my hooves. I think I have shown more than enough strength to satisfy thee for several lifetimes. Let me rest.”
“Rest?” Sunbeam repeated incredulously. “I think you forget the realities of leadership, Majesty. Those who wear the crown do not have the luxury of rest. You cannot ignore the responsibilities that come with your position simply because you are tired. You are queen, and must always conduct yourself as such.”
The Commander’s eyes narrowed. “Thou art quick to lecture me on the responsibilities of an office I held for centuries ere thou wert born.”
“Only when you need to hear such words, Your Majesty.” Sunbeam bowed to her. “I am, as ever, your most loyal advisor. A duty that occasionally requires me to remind you of things you should already know. The crown is a heavy burden, but you do not have the luxury of setting it aside.”
“Perhaps I should.” The Commander’s tone turned sharp. “Doubtless that would please thee. Thou canst rise no further without usurping me.”
Sunbeam’s teeth clenched. “I am and will always be loyal to you, my queen. I would have thought the lengths I have gone to in order to preserve your throne would provide ample evidence of that. If you find my words upsetting ... the truth is often unpleasant. However, I would be a poor advisor if I lied to spare your feelings.”
“The truth in thine eyes is often different from what any other sees,” the Commander snapped. “Thou wouldst claim to be my loyal servant? Then serve me by removing thyself from my presence until such time I require thy service.”
“Ah, so now you would hide from the truth rather than confront it?” Sunbeam asked archly. “‘Tis little difference ‘tween hiding at the bottom of a bottle and removing any who dare to point out the folly of such a course. I would be a poor vizier if I allowed either.”
The Commander grimaced and muttered something unexpectedly foul under her breath ere she addressed Sunbeam again. “Very well. What dost thou want? What must I say or do to be rid of thee and spend the rest of this evening in peace?”
“Act the part of a queen.” Sunbeam replied regally. “The army needs to see its leaders standing strong and resolute. A sobbing inebriate makes for a poor queen indeed, and I assure you that rumors will spread if you allow yourself to fall into such a state.” A hint of haughty disapproval entered her voice. “I and every soldier in the army saw those tears in your eyes. For the ones who betrayed you, waged war against your city, killed your loyal soldiers, and conjured an abomination that attempted to murder my daughter. Tell me, how many tears did you give to those who stayed loyal to you?”
“More than thou ever hast,” the Commander snapped, downing her drink with a single, massive gulp.
“That is true,” Sunbeam allowed before delivering a barb. “I do not waste my time with tears. They accomplish nothing, and are a needless distraction from actually achieving something useful. Tears would not win the war or save our soldiers’ lives.”
It took several deep breaths for the Commander to calm herself enough to answer. “I am not like thee, Sunbeam. And I am grateful for that every single day of my life.” She set about refilling her goblet. “The army needs time to rest, and ‘tis far too late to break camp and march. We can afford a single night ere we move again in the morn.”
“The army will rest far easier if its queen is actually leading it instead of making a drunken spectacle of herself,” Sunbeam answered coolly. “Spend a few hours with the common soldiers, hear their concerns and calm their hearts. Let them see the strength of their queen.”
The Commander grimaced, but slowly shook her head after several seconds. “I am sure Shadow can see to such things, and thou canst have words with the magi. I am in no mood to—”
Sunbeam cut her off. “Ah, so that is the way of it? You would accuse me of coveting your crown, yet when I ask you to actually be a queen, you cast aside your responsibilities to me? If that is to be the way of things, then perhaps you should give me your crown.”
The Commander drew herself up to her full height, glaring down at her archmagus. “Enough with thy venomous tongue.” Sunbeam began to respond, but the Commander cut her off. “I said have heard enough of it! Thousands are dead, Sunbeam! Is that enough for thy sanguine tastes, or must I reduce all Equestria to ash to satisfy thee?”
Sunbeam endured her rage, seeming unmoved. A long silence stretched out between them, until the Commander slowly shifted on her hooves, breaking eye contact with her advisor. That was when Sunbeam struck. “If I might be blunt, Your Majesty?”
“Hast thou e’er been anything else?” the Commander grumbled.
Sunbeam let the barb pass without comment. “I understand you are upset, but I am not to blame for what happened at Maresidian Fields. If you wish to find the cause of this battle, and find someone to blame for all the death, then do not look to me. Look in the mirror. You have done precious little since this war began to convince anypony that you are fit to rule.”
The Commander’s eyes widened. “Thou speakest out of turn to thy queen.”
“I speak what she needs to hear, howe'er painful it might be,” Sunbeam countered, stalking closer to her. “You are all too eager to call me a monster, but which of us spent years sacrificing her blood and sweat to make Equestria great, and which of stood apart from the world and did nothing? I care far more about the good of Equestria and ponykind that you ever have.”
The Commander’s fragile self control shattered, and her hoof smote Sunbeam across the cheek. “Be silent!” she roared, glaring down at the smaller mare. “I will not be called heartless and uncaring by thee of all ponies! There is nothing within thy heart but naked ambition and an endless lust for power! Dost thou covet my crown so much that thou must ceaselessly tell thyself that I am weak and unworthy, and thou wouldst make the better queen?! Such is thy vanity that there I times I am truly amazed thou didst not betray me to the rebellion!”
Her voice rose in volume with each accusation, until the very tent shook from its power. “For all thy claims that compassion and empathy are weaknesses, thou canst not see the strength they give to the ponies around us. ‘Twas not thy heartless logic and selfish ambition which held Canterlot, but ponies with love for kin and country in their hearts and unswerving dedication to our cause. Thou thinkest thyself wise for thy cruelty, but in truth thou art the greatest fool of all, so blinded by her own twisted soul that she cannot see the truth of the world.” Contempt flashed in her eyes. “But thy twisted mind could ne’er understand it. Thou wert quick enough to abandon thy firstborn when thy swollen belly risked thine ascent. E’en when consumed by my sister’s madness the Avatar loved hers. Wouldst thou cast Midnight aside as readily if she became an inconvenience to thine ambitions?”
Sunbeam slowly picked herself up off the floor, taking a moment to brush out her robes ere she spoke. There was a very slight tremor in her voice, but aside from that and the mark on her cheek there was no sign that the Commander’s words and actions had unsettled her in the slightest. “You are o’erwrought, and speaking many foolish things. If you have no further need of my advice at this time, Your Majesty—”
“GO.” Mine ears popped as the word physically struck through the air.
Sunbeam waited almost long enough to be insolent before turning about and moving for the exit. As she did so, she noticed me standing at the entrance and caught mine eye. She said nothing, but the brief nod she offered made her intent plain enough. Then strode out without another word, pausing only to apply a quick illusion to conceal the mark the Commander had left upon her.
I remained in place for some time after she left. The Commander’s choler would still be high, and because I did not share Sunbeam’s fondness for provoking her, I judged it wiser to give her some time to calm her unbalanced humors ere I spoke. After a few minutes of careful silence, I strode the rest of the way into the tent, clearing my throat to ensure that she was aware of my presence. “Commander.”
The Commander was in the midst of emptying the bottle of potent liquor that had escalated her disagreement with Sunbeam, but slowly set it aside when she realized I was there. Her eyes met mine, and I saw a confused tumult of emotions within them. Lingering anger at Sunbeam, regret o’er having struck her, sadness o’er the war and the terrible price it had demanded from all of us. But above all else, shame at the state I had found her in. “Shadow, didst thou...”
“I heard enough,” I confirmed.
Her shoulders sagged, and she slowly refilled her glass. “I should not have struck her, not spoken so cruelly. Such acts were beneath my dignity as a queen. Worse, I shall have to apologize for it.” She grimaced and downed the drink in a single gulp. “I expect she will make that already difficult process far more painful than it needs to be.”
“She has a singular talent for being vexing,” I agreed, carefully considering my words ere I continued. “Though I have found that sometimes, she is so vexing because there is some element of truth to what she says.”
The Commander’s eyes widened, and she turned upon me with an incredulous stare. “Thou thinkest me a distant and uncaring queen, then?”
“No,” I quickly reassured her, “but I imagine that I know you far better than most of your subjects. Precious few of them have e’er seen more than a glimpse of you at a distance. The truth of who you are with those few who truly know you is often far less important than how you are seen by those who do not.”
She sighed heavily, slumping down in her seat. “Of course. I suppose, then, that you agree with most of what Sunbeam said, if not the manner in which she said it?”
I chose my words carefully. “How one is seen by the world is a difficult balance, and easily upset by the smallest action or inaction. Since the war began, little has been seen of you outside of court and the war council. Relatively small actions could have far greater impact than ‘twould seem like they should.”
“So thou dost agree with her, but are far more diplomatic in thy words.” She grimaced and set the bottle aside. “Dost thou also agree that I have been a poor queen, then?”
“I think you a queen who always seeks to do what is best for her realm and subjects. There is no higher virtue a ruler can hold.” I hesitated for a long moment, then carefully pressed on. “I also think that, like any other pony, you are capable of making mistakes. Mistakes are always far more likely when one is ill at ease, and I do not think you have truly been confident in your rule since you lost your sister to madness.”
The Commander closed her eyes and took a long, slow breath. “I fear you are right on that account. It has been ... hard, without her. Not only the pain of losing my beloved sister, but ... the leadership of all Equestria was ne’er meant to be borne by a single pony. In older times each of the tribes had its own leaders, and my sister and I shared the throne in better days. Perhaps the burden is simply too great for any one being to bear, e’en an immortal who is often said to be like unto a goddess.”
She took a deep breath, then nodded to herself. “I had been considering ... well, to be honest, it seemed more an idle thought, but these conversations have brought it into focus. That is to say...” She shook her head and paused several seconds, and when she resumed her words seemed much more confident. “I have waited for o’er a century for my sister to shed her madness and rejoin me. When I met her Avatar ... I saw nothing of the sister I once knew and loved. Merely a creature consumed by darkness and all the worst traits ponykind has to offer. Though I dearly hope she will recover, there seems little hope for it in the immediate future. It also seems that Equestria cannot afford to leave her throne vacant indefinitely.”
I could guess at what she intended, but could scarcely credit it. “Commander, what are you—”
She held up a hoof to silence me. “As you said before, Sunbeam is often vexing because there is an element of truth to her words. You and her have played a key role in ending this war and keeping my throne secure. I do not agree with Sunbeam’s claim that the both of thee have done more to rule the realm than I in recent days, but I think thou hast—” She hesitated a moment, and then pointedly corrected herself. “That you have demonstrated ample qualifications for the post.” A wry grin slipped across her lips. “That, and I certainly would not offer the crown to Sunbeam.”
E’en though I had already suspected that she would make the offer, to actually hear it spoken out loud... “Commander, I do not know what to—”
“I believe,” she gently interrupted, “that you should become accustomed to calling me Celestia.”
I took a deep breath, then slowly shook my head. “Comman—” I cut myself off as I noted her playfully amused glare. “Celestia. I am honored that you think me worthy of such praise, but this is perhaps not the best time to make such a momentous decision. You have had a very long and trying day, and...” I tried to think of the best way to say that her judgement was clearly compromised by stress and drink without being rude.
She took a deep breath, then reluctantly nodded. “You do raise a fair point: I am not at my best. I expect you will want some time to consider my offer, in any case. Not to mention that putting an end to this war must take precedence o’er anything else.” She smiled and gently placed a hoof on my shoulder. “Take that time to consider mine offer, and I shall ensure that it truly is what would be best for Equestria. Then we can decide.”
“Very well then.” Certainly something as momentous as the Commander’s proposal should not be decided upon hastily. In truth, the idea was so massive that I struggled to comprehend it. The idea that I might share the throne with the Commander, mayhaps e’en raised to immortality and equal power to her ... I could scarcely believe that such a thing was e’en possible.
We both fell silent for some time, neither of us entirely certain what to say next. As the silence stretched out long enough to become painful, I coughed and shifted topics. “Commander, I should see to my troops. Some of them are doubtless shaken by the day’s events, and we should begin preparing to march on Cloudsdale. Steel’s army might be undone, but Rightly still has a force in the field. Marching on Cloudsdale will force him to meet us.”
“Of course.” She sighed heavily. “At least then this war will finally be over. Far too late: I have wished for it to be over since it started.”
“As have we all,” I murmured. “When it began, I hoped that all the horrors we suffered would be justified with a better Equestria at the end of it. Now ... now I wonder how anything good could come from so much death and destruction.”
“Nothing good will. ‘Tis why I so truly despise war.” She closed her eyes and took a long breath. “There have been just wars in our past, foul tyrants o’erthrown and unspeakable monsters stopped. There was nothing like that in this. ‘Twas a war that ne’er should have happened, and not a single pony shall be happier for it. I only hope that we can heal the wounds this war has left upon Equestria as quickly as possible. Let us not linger upon old hurts, but move on to better things.”
“On that point, we are agreed.” I grimaced and shook my head. “Though I do not know what will become of the pegasi. Steel chose death o’er surrender and the end of the clans. If Rightly and his soldiers should do the same ... I have already buried far too many of mine own kind. If Rightly forces us to fight to the last to capture Pegasopolis, ‘twill be a bloody business. A part of me fears that precious few pegasi will survive the battle on either side.” I had already presided o’er the death of the clans. Would I also be responsible for the end of the pegasus race?
The Commander rested a hoof on my shoulder. “I will do everything in my power to ensure that it does not come to that. I hope that what happened here will be enough to persuade Rightly to make peace.”
“As do I.” ‘Twould at least give the burning of Maresidian Fields some purpose beyond merely destroying the rebel army. “You are not the only one to mourn the fallen, no matter their side.”
“I am glad to hear it.” A sad smile flickered across her lips. “Though I am afraid my mask has become quite brittle today. On days like this, it is quite difficult to seem like a proper queen.”
“Is there anything I might do?”
The Commander took a deep breath, then nodded to herself. “I think Sunbeam was right in one regard: I will find no comfort in the bottom of a bottle, just another form of misery to distract from my current troubles. I would not be alone, and there is no other I could trust to see me at my worst. Stay with me, my lady protector?”
I smiled and slowly stepped closer to her. “Of course, Commander.”
The Commander smiled and slowly wrapped one of her wings around me, drawing me nearer. “Did I not tell thee that thou must become accustomed to calling me Celestia? I think I shall have to insist upon it ere the night is done.”
“Very well ... Celestia.”
The rest of what passed ‘tween us on that night is a private matter that has no place in this memoir.
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Celestia wanted Shadow to take up Luna's mantle? Wow. How lonely Celestia must be...
So, yeah, they banged.
8542015
That I can understand. Wish Shadow took her up on it.
8542127
This would make an interesting "Road Not Taken" story, where Nightmare Moon returns with Shadow at Celestia's side.
I love and hate you so much right now!
... Anyone else picturing the Lannister Theme? Like, every meeting that goes South starts to go Red Wedding.
8542135
yup.
8542015
Lonely, but also poignantly aware that at this point she was not ready to rule alone. She ruled as a diarchy for a long time before this, remember. Hundreds of years, together. Now she is alone and should not be, she wants someone capable of ruling beside her where Luna sat until Luna is ready to return - a Night's Regent, perhaps. The weight of all those lives and histories and futures placed on her now that she is isolated and mournful, at her worst from grief and pain that seems eternal from a mortal perspective. Ponies have been born and died of old age in the time she's been mourning her lost family, family she sacrificed to protect them.
.. I think that's something ponies and readers forget too, is where a mortal is burdened with the past, not only does she have far more past to be burdened with, but the future is also her burden in that she can see it to some degree. And when those futures get cut off, the good ends thwarted, she has to deal with that as well.
What is essentially a god she may be, she is still a pony.
8542235
Fair enough. I'm not judging her, but I was just as surprised as Shadow at the offer
images.gr-assets.com/hostedimages/1380435156ra/879086.gif
8542239
You weren't, there are a number who do. Usually the sort who don't really see past their reader perspective. Still makes a good discussion point!
With how that phrase is used, I honestly think it would have been hardly less compromising to go ahead and admit what you two did -- especially if it wasn't sex, because that's certainly going to be what a lot of people are going to think after reading that.
8542214
No kidding. The Rains of Castamere started playing in my head as soon as I read that sentence.
You have a spectacular talent for cutting off the scenes with Shadow and Celestia just before we get to that good hurt/comfort shit. I just want to see em hug, dammit.
Good cool down chapter overall. I'm very interested in how the rejection of ascension plays out and Shadow's reasons.
She didn't have a problem going into TMI when she banged Sunbeam... 'course that was a hate-banging...
I wonder if it will come to pass that the earth ponies view Celestia coming out onto the field and massacring their soldiers as reason to jump ship, the ship being Equestria as a whole. Imagine the royal army showing up into the earth pony cities and towns, only to find it abandoned.
8542950
Alright, this AU couldn't be called "Road Not Taken", but I think Celestia wouldn't make the offer to give Luna's mantle to Shadow if that wasn't a thing that could be done. Correct me if I'm wrong, but in "Rise of the Phoenix Empress", Sunbeam thought Celestia was going to give her Luna's mantle.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2012/10/5/114565__safe_artist-colon-toonbat_derpy+hooves_rainbow+dash_and+then+sex+happened_and+then+they+all+fucked_banner_female_heart_mare_pegasus_pony_simple.jpg
8542950
well I actually don't like the premise of Phoenix Empire. I just can't see Tia giving up on seeing Luna again.
And then they banged
Celestia will learn some hard lessons from this, and her tutelage isn't over yet. Sunbeam? I'm not sure if she'll learn anything. And Shadow...
Well, we know how it turns out, but seeing how she contemplates the offer should be very interesting to see indeed.
How can a story that is incomplete have a sequel?
Never has the difference of personalities between Celestia and Sunbeam been so apparent as in this chapter. Where Sunbeam does have a heart, she has no reason to mourn what she sees as enemies and believes that the ends justify the means. Celestia is compassionate, and that is her downfall in situations like these.
And yes, Sunbeam spoke harshly, but there indeed was truth in her words... and Celestia, in the end, had forsaken the bottle for better company.
Lucky for her that she had the better company, else who knows how many bottles would she have gone through.
Also, Shadow got laid again, it would seem. Who knew it took merely something others would call an atrocity to bed the queen?
8548962
Well the overall outcome of the story is already known, so it's not like the Midnight's Shadow stories are spoiling much. They just explore the wider ramifications of the events in this story.
And now we are seeing the post-fire emotional toil Celestia has to go through. It's done excellently. Sunbeam just got on her case at the very worst/best time.
I wonder what stories the rebels that survived this specific battle would tell of Celestia, and what long term effects it would have aside from what we already know of in Midnight's stories.
Looking forward to the showdown at Cloudsdale! Great chapter, well done!
Also, obligatory
for what is implied at the end of the chapter. Love that it wasn't all just Celestia having a major crush with Shadow always too duty bound to acknowledge their feelings for one another. After all, Shadow was perfectly sober when *ahem* private matters came about.
Snuggles obviously, get thy mind out of the gutter.
8551721
So they're more like side stories that take place in the same universe as the main story?
8552479
More or less.
8552588
Thank you. Most stories will say 'Takes place in the same universe as X,' and this has confused me since I started going to this site.
8552803
Glad to help!
Hum. Everything about Celestia's attack happened off-screen...but I think I am fine with that. The consecuences are gruesome enough, no need to give details.
There can not be many chapters left...I am going to miss this story.
8542023
Twas a scant year later that Shadow's younger foal would be born, a surprise to... Well, not all, but most.
Well, dang, Shadow. I guess I see where Cloud got it from.
Emperor above.... Welp, I'm finally caught up, and holy shit has this been a roller coaster of a story so far! Can't wait for the next chapter!
8553462
Yeah, no kidding. This entire war seems to have taken ques from WW1. The loss of entire villages of young men is right out of the history books, and the tunnels bear harsh similarity to the trenches. As for that final spell... Flammenwerfer troops were hated and feared, to the point where it is said they bore their pistols so if they were captured, they could shoot themselves for their enemies would be far less merciful. I can only imagine the horrors would be tenfold to witness and entire army be immolated.
Sunbeam pulls no punches, as usual, but she is also very much correct this time.
8542214
I subscribe to the theory that Sunbeam loves Celestia. She is a creature of ambition, but I think most of her ambitions of good governance that serves the common pony would not be possible without an immortal ruler to safeguard them. Thus, especially now, half of Sunbeam's scheming focuses on making Celestia into the best Celestia she can be.