• Member Since 9th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen October 4th

PseudoFiction


Okay, now I know the empty bottle of whiskey on my desk 'looks' bad, but there's a perfectly sober explanation.


T

A young priestess of the Covenant accompanies Equestria's Elements of Harmony with a particular mission. To uncover an ancient Forerunner ruin in the Everfree Forest. As time goes on she becomes witness to the magic of friendship, uncovers a series of disturbing truths and soon must make some harrowing decisions regarding her faith.

What is the greater sin; disobedience or desecration?

Rated Teen for violent themes.

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 10 )

You know? This sounds like an interesting plot. I'll check it out soon.

-Will

I saw the cover, and I thought it was just another Covie-invades-gets-beaten-by-one-human Halo fic.

I was pleasantly surprised. This is actually quite original.

I do think you may need a proof-reader, though. I spotted a few areas where you needed extra commas:

The doors had swished aside automatically spilling the harsh corridor lighting into her room, and letting the heavy odour of incense escape in her wake.

should be:

The doors had swished aside automatically, spilling the harsh corridor lighting into her room, and letting the heavy odour of incense escape in her wake.

There was also a phrase: 'black veil of infinity' that I thought needed work.

All in all, a very good start.

One more thing; I think 'Covenant' should not be italicized.

1943094
:yay: for constructive criticism. I'm gonna look into that. Thanks. You get a thumbs-up.

The commander saw his reflection flinch. When he was but a boy he was raised in the family keep’s common rooms by several mothers. And Celestia’s stern side reminded him of all six.

Even Sangheili shipmasters must return home in time for dinner :rainbowlaugh: I really like the story :pinkiehappy: The idea of a peaceful contact between Equestria and the Covenant is much more original than the cliché "We are the Covenant, your race is an affront to the will of the Forerunners, WORT WORT WORT kill them all, then arrives the humans and save the world"
it would be interesting if it were set just before the Great Schism and were the Sangheili, not the humans, to protect the planet against a Brute invasion
images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120409185526/halo/images/5/5c/ImagesCAHOYG3I.jpg
...
...
...
:fluttershysad: please, no nishum in the story

3448686
This is indeed set before the shism, and strangely the whole idea of a group of Sangheili protecting ponies is going to be the story - with a twist of course. I do hope to get back to this story some time. It hasn't even introduced a character I've been itching to showcase yet. I just need to get over myself and get to writing.

Thanks for taking the time to read and comment on Grasslands. It may be my least popular story, but it's my personal fave.

3448720
:pinkiesad2: it's a shame, in my opinion it's the best story you've written, along with Canis Fidelis: Harmony :coolphoto:
I hope that in the future Grasslands gets the proper recognition from more people (if not, I'll glass they're entire planet :twilightangry2:)

So is this thing dead or what?

What you've got here is pretty damned good, both an original premise and pretty well written and its explores where relatively little canon has been established in the Halo Universe.

If this thing is dead then that's a shame, but if you do ever feel like continuing this story then I think it could turn out really great.

4334311
As I mentioned in an earlier comment on this story, I love this story the most out of all the stories I've written. I'm desperately trying to piece together motivation to keep writing this story. It's hit one of those chapters that is really hard to get right. But some day...
Some day :pinkiehappy:

4346840 I see, that's good to hear and take all the time you need, I understand how difficult it can be to get aspects of the story to work as you want them to, but it's nice to know its still being worked on.

4346840

Assuming you ever do pick this back up. . .

Would humans ever get screen time?

Login or register to comment