Doctor Whooves and the House of Daring

by Paleo Prints

Chapter 4: The Mind of Evil

Doctor Whooves and the House of Daring
Chapter Four: The Mind of Evil

Once upon a time, near the magical land of Equestria.

The smoke-stained stallion walked out of the jungle tree line. He was dressed in wreckage from head to hoof, his once-white suit blackened, his collar garnished with a now-fried and unrecognizable vegetable. Holding on to the pile of used kindling that could arguably be called a hat, he walked to the edge of a sparkling crystal pool. A river-like torrent fed the lake from the rocks towering above him. Aside from the sound of the spray, the only other noise was the gentle rustling of trees, their fragrant red and white flowers slowly dancing in the wind. Surrounding by crimson blooms and the crash of water, the pony finally began to sit and compose his thoughts.

He was called the Doctor, and although he was younger than he had been in years, he felt old.

Long minutes passed as he stared into the glistening lagoon. As hoofbeats approached, his eyes stared into the shifting pool, watching the currents along the bottom carry things away. Reality suddenly intruded on him as deft feathers yanked his hat remnant from his head and skipped it into the waterfall. It skimmed along the surface, lodging into a rocky crevice near the cascading tide.

He cast an irritated glance at the golden-coated mare smirking above him to little effect. Daring Do regularly suffered glares from the kind of people who employed capable underlings of questionable morals, often employing them in her direction. Considered along that spectrum, an irritated stare from the Doctor was a reward.

“I can’t take you anywhere, Dorothea Do.”

Soot scattered as her wing ruffled his mane.

“And yet,” she said with a smile, “you take me everywhere. Cheer up, you silly boy.”

He sagged, staring into the water. “That was my hat.”

“You have twenty like it,” Daring replied with a snort. As she spoke, Daring’s primary feathers unbuttoned her jacket.

Staring at an incurious fish, the Doctor wondered if sentience was overrated.

“That was my favorite hat.”

As Daring rolled her eyes, she folded her vest and placed it on the ground, weighing it against the wind with her pith helmet. He’s in one of those moods, she thought with a sigh. “It could barely be called a hat anymore, Doctor! Cheer up. You’re alive, you’ve stopped a lunatic, and you’re with a famous and beautiful mare about to go for a swim in a lagoon. I know a dozen stallions who would knife-fight to be in your place. Geronimo, by the way.”

The Doctor’s eyes stayed unfocused as a torrent of water caught him squarely in the face. Gradually he returned his attention to his surroundings, thoughts swimming in his head as he watched Daring sit under the waterfall, her feathers nimbly washing ash out of her hair.

“I want wings,” he finally announced. “I’ve had horns, but never wings. They’re so useful. It’s not fair.”

Her answer started with another splash to his face, punctuated by her pointing hoof.

“You got youth this time. Try enjoying it. I certainly do.”

“And you,” he replied with a tentative smile, “are both washing your hair and gesturing accusatively. Still jealous.”

The minutes passed in quiet contentment, sunlight scattering over the still water

“We interfered again,” he said finally. ”We came for your treasure map and we still found trouble. Why did we become involved again?”

Daring pulled herself through the lagoon, stopping to fold her forelimbs on a rock while she rested her head upon them. She gave the Doctor a long look before speaking.

“Because you spoke up. You stood in the middle of everything, shook your hooves in your endearing little way, and said ‘This is Something Wrong. This Ends Today.’ I saw a good stallion filled with energy and righteousness do what he does best. If you hadn’t, you wouldn’t the Doctor I know and... admire.”

Centuries of focusing on the bigger picture allowed the Doctor to see the large vistas while missing the small, vitally important parts. He sighed as he composed himself, Daring’s words fading without remark.

“One day you’ll be a ruined mare because of me, Dorothea Do.”

A flick of her wing answered him with a wet spray. He almost managed not to smile as he wiped his face.

“My dear Doctor,” Daring said with a wiggle of her feathered water weapons, “I’m positively looking forward to it.”

Swimming over to shore, Daring lifted herself on her front hooves as her wings extended. Nimble feathers wrapped around a flower-covered branch, drawing it down within smelling range. She breathed in the sweet aroma of the red and white petals.

“Incidentally,” the Doctor said as he proved his innate ability to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. “I think your treasure map is off, I don’t know of any hidden gold here.”

“It’s very well hidden, apparently,” she replied while rolling her eyes. “This Scarlet Bloom blossom is gorgeous. Would I be ruining my image as a liberated mare if I put a flower in my hair, Doctor?”

Smirking, he stood and gently bit a flower from a low-hanging branch. Daring silently inclined her head as he furled its stem through her mane, setting it just above her right ear. He gently ran his hoof down her mane once unconsciously, staring into her eyes as her wings straightened up.

“Dorothy, I think the whole point of being liberated is being free to choose what you are without worrying about categories. Don’t worry about being a ‘proper’ adventurer; be who you want to be. What’s the use of liberation if you can’t be a mare as well?”

She watched him stare at her mane.

“Besides,” he concluded, “the red really shines against the grey. I like it.”

They sat there for a while until the Doctor raised his litany of crimes to committed multiple murder of quiet moments.

“That statue of Princess Mailaika they’ve put in front of the hospital is really something, no? You have to admire zebra art for tugging your hearts’ strings.”

Daring stiffened.

“When I think of what she could have done,” she started to say before closing her mouth. Looking up, she saw the Doctor’s eyes resting on her. Daring knew he’d give her the entire afternoon to compose her next sentence if she needed it.

“Tell me why, Doctor?” she finally asked. “How did a monster like Mfalme get to have a daughter like that?”

He stirred the waters of the pond with a hoof as he stared down and far away.

“He tried to grind the world under his hoof, yes,” the Doctor finally offered. “Always remember that he did it for her. He kept the nightingale in a cage, and tried to expand the cage to every horizon.”

He sneezed as Daring’s wing tickled his nose.

“So, if you love something,” she concluded, “you have to let it run free.”

Daring Do sighed. Paddling over to him, she rested her head on his crossed forelimbs. This time, the Doctor could sense her need for quiet. Thoughts collided in his head while he watched the shadows of the day lengthened. Every so often his hoof would rest on Daring’s mane, and she would freeze the way a naturalist does when not wishing to spook a timid, rare wild animal. Finally his long and meandering train of thought arrived at the station of his mouth.

“There’s something coming, Dorothy.”

Daring snorted. “There’s no wildlife or ponies around this lagoon. Trust me, I’ve scouted this place pretty well.” Swallowing in sudden embarrassment, she sunk back into bravado. “I told the little dog kid not to bring the airship for several days.”

His hooves lifted her head up, cracking her heart as she saw worry fill his eyes.

“I don’t mean beasts, zebras, or or little Shortwide,” he said. “I mean something’s coming for me, in a general foreboding kind of way. I’ve listened to the symphony of life, and I hear the first notes of an overture that will play as the galaxy burns. I don’t think it’ll be resolved for centuries, but I have to steer the symphony. Someone must be in at the beginning to leave their mark. Daring, I have to leave soon.”

As her hooves entwined around his, she said with confidence, “You’ll be back.”

“How could you know?” The Doctor with a cocked head and a curious smile.

“Because you’ll promise me, and I’ll hold you to it.” Her smile glowed with humor and a few other things the Doctor missed. “Because, if you don’t return to me, I’ll hunt you down and kill you.”

He breathed out slowly. In the eight short years in this form, he still enjoyed the taste of air in these lungs. In two weeks, that was one of two the memories of that day he would think of on a lonely planetoid as the regeneration energy flowed over him. The other was summed up in his mysterious last word, “Gold.”

At the current moment (or as close as one ever gets to that as a time traveller), he was still studying her face. “You’re not the same little girl in a dirty dress willing to take on zebrican assassins, Daring.” He nudged a lock of hair out of her eyes as she shivered at the touch.

“Thanks,” she said with a smile. “You did that. Without you, I’d be a proper Trottingham lady. While we’re on the subject of changes, I much prefer this year’s model of you to the interstellar tramp look.”

The Doctor froze for several seconds before gently pushing Daring back into the water. “Well,” he announced as he stood, “we should get a move on to get to the next point in the treasure hunt. Who knows, maybe we’ll be dodging stone arrows by breakfast.”

Water sailed into the air as Daring Do rose halfway out of the pond, her spreading feathers launching a wet cascade. Dripping partly with amusement, her wings snagged the Doctor’s lapel.

“We’re right where we need to be,” she said.

The Doctor pitched sideways at the tug and was dragged off-balance toward the pool.

“Um,” he declared as his hoofs touched the waterline. “Um, Daring, we should go meet up with Shortwide, shouldn’t we?”

Her face was suddenly so very more closer to his than usual.

“I said my companion has his own holiday,” she said as hooves locked around his forelimb. “Let the little scamp have a week in Mareocco. Your companion is right here, and demands attention.” Daring quickly yanked the Doctor off of his hooves.

A second later a bedraggled head broke the surface, spitting water. Finally able to stand, the Doctor felt a hoof move across his chest. His jacket, barely holding itself together after the misadventures of the past few days, fell apart into pieces.

“I-I thought you brought me here to seek treasure,” he managed to stammer as she gently bit his ear. “D-Dorothy, where’s the gold supposed to be?”

She snorted with his ear in her mouth, drawing a sharp breath of pain from him. Pulling back, Daring Do gave him a long-suffering look that a dozen other mares had given him over centuries. “Oh, Doctor. My dear, silly boy. You see but do not perceive. Have you looked at me lately, Doctor?”

With her wet wings encircling around him, the only color the Doctor could see was a shimmering gold. He had seen planets formed in supernovae-rich star clusters that glimmered golden from their sun’s light, but Daring’s warm coat seemed to outshine them all as she pushed him backwards against the stony rim of the pool.

“Daring,” he gasped. “What... are you.... ”

She stopped biting his neck long enough to whisper in his ear. “Alive, Doctor. Today, unlike others, I’m alive. Remind me what that’s like.”

The Doctor gently lifted her chin, readying any number of speeches his former selves had practiced for years. Her eyes stopped him. In this body alone, he had spent years watching the universe try to kill Daring. In all that time, he had never seen the fearful vulnerability that shone in her purple eyes now.

Of all the black deeds billed to the Doctor’s soul, he’d never add breaking a proud, dirty young girl in petticoats. And he was so young now...

“I won’t run, Daring,” he said before careful planting his lips on hers, drinking in her breath of excitement. As her wings closed around him, the beating of three hearts sang louder than the waterfall.
___

Smooth Storm always hated physical education teachers.

Growing up, he had spent his somewhat-difficult flight school years shocked at the state of his instructors. The harder the training regiment grew, the more out of shape the faculty running it seemed to be. He was shocked that Mister Cumulous didn’t bring Cloudsdale down single-hoofedly, or at least make it sag.

When he became part of the athletic world as a sportscaster, he promised himself the he would never be so hypocritical. Over the years he had always kept himself in shape, and the public, his self-esteem, and his wife greatly appreciated it.

As Smooth Storm collapsed onto the floor, he wondered if he should have done more.

“H-hold on, kiddo,” he said as he skidded to a slow walk. Minutes of panicked flight had turned into more minutes of gliding, and finally into a long stretch of running. Shaking, he gently placed Dinky onto the floor next to him as he collapsed onto the floor.

The worried sideways face of his granddaughter entered his vision. “Grandpapa? You’re not okay.” She looked around. “We need to get some cover.”

“No, Little Muffin.” He panted on his side. “Grandpapa needs a break.”

Are those the monsters’ footfalls, he wondered, or my own heartbeat?

Dinky let out a frustrated squeak as she looked around. “Does everybody with a cutie mark assume kids are dumb! Gellbiflorbit!” She reached for her grandfather’s glasses. “Lemme take a look at you.”

Storm blinked and pushed Dinky’s hoof away. “Sorry, those are a trademark.” He tried and failed to pull himself upright as his lungs started to get a handle on the situation. Storm noted that he was on some kind of upstairs balcony. The soft chairs and cushions looked comfortable. The visible starfield hanging just beyond the bannister didn’t.

“Hey, kiddo.” His breathing slowed down. “What does ‘Gellbiflorbit’ mean?”

Years of parenting let him decode the blush on Dinky’s face. “Well,” she said as she scratched her mane, “Daddy says if I say it again around a universal translator or a native Jehk-Dallimak speaker again I’ll get my mouthed washed out.”

Storm sagely responded, “Huh,” just before the Nothing Man leapt onto the banister and roared.

“Run,” Storm barked out as his wing shoved Dinky away from the ferocious flicker. “Run now.”

Dinky leapt over the prone stallion’s limb and stood between him and the not-thing.

“Back off,” she cried as her horn glimmered. “You don’t know who I am, do you?”

In response, the not-thing raised its giant claw.

Storm’s eyes filled with tears. “Please run, Dinky. Please. Don’t look back.”

She stood her ground as the monster reared back, and saw it keep rearing back to a ludicrous degree as Dinky heard the bannister crack. As two strong hands pushed the wooden balcony frame and accompanying monster into the void, the Nothing Man reared back as far as dimensional physics allowed, screaming as it tumbled into everywhere.

“Well,” Molossus said as he wiped the saw dust off, “I’m glad that’s taken care of!”

Dinky galloped into him, sending the exhausted butler staggering backwards as she nuzzled his face.

“Molly Moo saved us!”

He nodded before hitting his back on the floor and sighing. “I did, didn’t I?”

A shadow loomed across Dinky, as she turned into the livid face of her grandfather.

“Why didn’t you run,” he whispered forcefully. “What ever taught you that you could stand up to a monster?”

Dinky blinked.

“My Dad. I learned it from watching Dad.”

Storm paused, then shook his head. “Molossus, can I help you up?”

The gigantic canine gently placed Dinky to the side as he forced himself to stand. “Not without a crane, Master Storm, but the offer is appreciated.”

Shaking, Storm nodded and collapsed onto a cushion. “I was worried about you.”

“Grandpapa!”

Actually flinching from Dinky’s tone, Storm found himself tongue-tied as Dinky pointed a reproachful hoof at him.

“Why would you worry about Molossus?” Dinky rolled her eyes, gritting her teeth. “I mean, if the monsters got him he’d cease to exist, right? So, if you could worry, there’s nothing to worry about!” Her front hooves shook in the air in frustration. “Does anybody else actually think about these things? Aargh!”

Butler and stallion shared a long look.

“Permission to giggle, sir?”

“Granted.”

Dinky huffed as the two adults chuckled as much as their energy allowed. She blew her hair out of her eyes and stared at Molossus.

“Mister Molly Moo? Have you seen Daddy?”

He slowly shook his head.

“Mistress Dinkestra, haven’t you proven that we shouldn’t worry?”

She snorted. “Right. I did.” Watery eyes stared down the hallway. “Still, sometimes he does crazy things to save me and Mommy and Sparks, a-and I... I wo... I’m just wondering.”

A hand that could crush watermelons caressed Dinky’s mane as Molossus bent down. “My dear child,” he said, “do you know who your father is?”

“Yes,” Dinky said as she wiped her nose. “He’s the Doctor.”

“Doctor?” Storm cocked his head. “Doctor who?”

“Master Doo-Smith would have enjoyed that,” Molossus said with a nod. “Give me a moment, Master Storm. Mistress Dinkestra, tell me more about your father. Who is he?”

Dinky straightened up. She blinked as she gave a deep breath.

“He’s really old.”

Storm rolled his eyes. “Think about how I feel.”

He was shocked into silence as Dinky said, “I think he’s as old as Celestia. Like, everybody in the universe knows him, and he knows everyplace. He’s saved lots of people.” She stared at Molossus defiantly. “And Mom says you have to call them ‘people’ because not all of them are ponies. I helped him do it, a few times.”

“Listen,” Storm interrupted, “I’m not sure that fairy tales... ”

“And what do people call him, Mistress Dinkestra?”

“The Doctor,” Dinky started, “an’ I think he’s the Wizard of the Travelling Box. Mommy said the bad things call him the Oncoming Storm. Some really nice purple oozy things call him the Bringer of Shape.”

Storm’s mouth failed to open wider as a tear glimmered in Molossus’ eye.

Molossus nodded. “Please listen to me. The four mares he has most loved in his life are under this roof. What does that tell you?”

“That he’s gonna come back for us. He always comes back.”

Only Storm noticed the way Molossus froze at Dinky’s statement, and the way he paused just before nodding. Slowly, his giant frame straightened to its full height.

“Then believe in him,” Molossus whispered. “Believe he will return, and make him proud. You are the Doctor’s daughter, and the universe has expectations.”

Dinky nodded, as she stood onto her hooves. “You remind me of that blue unicorn that Miss Savory travelled with.”

“That is high praise,” Molossus said as he bowed low. “Now let us find your father.”

As the group walked off, Storm gently hooked his wing around Molossus’ arm and pulled him closer. The obedient butler lowered his head.

“Listen,” Storm whispered, “I really appreciate you playing pretend with her to cheer her up... ”

Molossus shook his head.

“Have your own eyes not convinced you, Master Storm? Stars swirl around us as monsters prowl. The Doctor is real, sir, and everything we said is true.”

Storm stopped as Molossus picked up a squealing Dinky, placing the giggling filly upon his shoulder.

“It is far time you do as she did,” he continued, “and accept your family’s legacy.”

___

Inside the museum, incomprehensible death surrounded Topsy Turvy. The enigmatic monsters approached her and her family while the weird floating mask watched. Topsy had very little idea of the intricacies of the situation, but she knew it was serious from the way everyone acted. As a proper Bronxian mother, she had one responsibility.

“Mother,” Sparkler said as she whirled a suit of armor around. “Everyone else could fly. Leave me. I’ll-- ”

Sparkler stopped as a wingtip quickly smacked the back of her head.

“Don’t you dare.” Ditzy’s wings flared out protectively, the way her ancestors had displayed them at predators. “One, I am not leaving you. Two, Aunt Daring can’t fly.”

Daring smirked as she hefted a spear into her wingtips, watching the Nowhere Men circle. “Very perceptive, Grandniece. And three, I bet flying is a chore for you as well, lately.”

Ditzy swallowed, pretending not to hear. “Three, If they get Daring, it’s all over anyway from a chronological standpoint. We have to think-- ”

The not-things were almost within claw’s reach.

“Ditzy,” Topsy suddenly shouted, “I’m proud of you!”

Things went silent as the assembled ponies eyed Topsy curiously.

“I love you too, Mom,” Ditzy said with a sigh. “Anyway, we-- ”

If Ditzy thought that her mother was about to stop talking, she was suffering amnesia.

“I mean, it’s been so hard for you with the eyes and words and brain thing, and you raised two lovely daughters.”

The Nowhere Men paused for a second, startled by Ditzy’s hate-filled scream.

“What?”

“Kill them,” intoned Mfalme. “I command you.”

The Nowhere Men still paused.

The floating mask look from side to side. “Old habits. Well, If I can’t command you, I suggest it to you!”

They began moving again. WE END. WE COME NOW TO...

“Shut up!” Ditzy shouted at the stunned Nowhere Man before turning to Topsy. “Mother, is that all you can really say?”

Topsy’s wings flared, her brain reacting to Ditzy like a charging predator. “Well, I-I, I mean... ”

The entire room froze as Ditzy advanced on her mother. “Mother, my brain is fine--”

“More than fine,” Daring interjected. She leaned on a spear, enjoying the show.

Ditzy drew a deep breath as she saw the terror in Topsy’s eyes. “And you don’t know. How could you?” Ditzy smiled, then kissed her mother on the forehead. “Thanks, Mom. Okay, time to break Rule Number Point Seventy-Five.”

She turned to the Nowhere Men with the smile a schoolteacher gives to an unruly pupil.

“Excuse me, I think you should run.”

One of the Nowhere Men stepped forward toward Sparkler. A suit of armor slashed a sword through it, passing through harmlessly.

WE FEAR NOTHING. WE BRING YOU TO NOTHING.

Ditzy stepped between the monster and her daughter.

“I’m Ditzy Doo,” she said with confidence. “If you’re a representation of the universe, you know me, right?”

Topsy huddled next to Daring. “What in Equestria is she doing? She’s just a mail-mare!”

As Daring gently placed a hoof in front of Topsy’s mouth, she shook her head. “Enjoy this one, Topsy. I have a feeling its going to be good. Top ten, maybe.”

One of the Nowhere Men hesitated.

WE ERASE.

“Of course,” answered Ditzy in a barely patient tone of voice. “You’re one of the forces that protect the universe, right? Remember me, then? They call me the Grey Angel, and the Seer of Two Paths, and a whole buncha other things. Are you dense, or half-formed, or something? I’m the bloody Derpy. You can’t erase me.”

The beings turned from one to another in confusion before one advanced towards Daring. Daring stood her ground, saluting with a wing.

SOME WORLDS MAY BE SACRIFICED FOR THE UNIVERSE.

It stopped as Ditzy jumped in front of it, stamping her hoof. “‘Some’ worlds? ‘Some,’ buddy?
Listen, here, because I’m going to say this once. I deactivated the Entropic Bomb in the first singularity. Someone here stopped the Local Group of galaxies from imploding. Raise your hoof if it’s you! Hey, remember who stood against the Chronovorous Horde at the dawn of time? I do!”

As Ditzy advanced on the monster, grinning like a manticore, it took several steps back.

“You forgot the most important thing, Mister Flickerhead.”

UH. YES?

Ditzy sat down in front of the Nowhere Man. “I keep the Doctor in check. That’s right, you know the Doctor? The guy who keeps all the planets spinning? I’ve spent years convincing him to help instead of turn his back, make him spare civilizations instead of making examples of them. I have no idea how the universal census turns out without me, but I pretty sure he gives up at some point. Where does that leave your cosmos?”

Sparkler leaned on Daring’s side with a contented smile as Ditzy poked at the Nowhere Man with a wingtip.

“If you want to explain to whatever employers you have why all the worlds in all the galaxies wink out at once, then go ahead! Touch me,” Ditzy said as she unfurled her wings. “Heck, touch anyone in this mansion! They’re all the things that make me who I am. You wink out anyone here, and you break all of time and space.”

Silence fell over the room.

“Do I make myself clear?”

“Oh boys,” Sparkler said as she laughed into Daring’s coat, “she’s using her ‘disappointed’ voice.”

The not-things retreated a step as one.

YES.

“Yes, what!?”

YES. MA’AM.

Ditzy stamped the floor in triumph. “Now get out of my sight.”

The Nowhere Men suddenly... weren’t. Ditzy allowed herself a brief grin as she scanned the room, stopping as she locked eyes with Mfalme.

“You’re next, Mister.”

The mask winked out.

Silence filled the museum. Ditzy slowly spun around, taking in the scattered relics, fallen trophies, and her mother shivering on the floor. With a suspicious frown, Ditzy paced a circle around her family as she peered around. She nodded in approval as Sparkler cleared a path telekinetically, and finally let out a deep sigh of relief.

“It’s okay, everybody. Nothing’s here.”

As Daring started slow-clapping on the floor, Topsy got her own legs to lift her at last and walked over to Ditzy. “N-nothing?” she stammered out. “R-really n-nothing or... or those Nothings?”

Ditzy rubbed the base of her nose with a wing.

“Just ‘nothing,’ Mother. I think we’re back to just plain, simple and innocuous ‘nothing’ again.” She smiled as she turned to Daring. “How did I do?”

Daring’s nod of approval filled Ditzy with warm butterflies. “Bravo. Bravo, indeed. You know, I never told you I found an ancient Llama ruin with sketches of you saving the day, did I? They captured your angry face perfectly. You are quite impressive, Misses Doo-Smith.”

The following giggling and stomping could have been heard in most of the house, and Sparkler joined in, swept up in the moment.

Topsy, however, was trying to keep her feet on the ground as reality spun around her.

“Pardon me,” she said with a wavering hoof in the air. “Why did the monsters run away from you, dear?”

Ditzy spun, slowly walking up to her mother with dignity. Suddenly she ducked forward, licking Topsy on the nose.

“Because I’m terrifying, Mom,” Ditzy said with a giggle.

Topsy was too startled to see Daring laughing into her wing.

“A-and this isn’t a joke?” Topsy blinked rapidly. “They acted like you really did travel around with... ”

“The Doctor,” Daring declared proudly as she hooked a proud wing around Dizty. “Topsy, it’s not only all true, it’s a bloody family tradition. After even I failed to net him, your daughter married the most eligible bachelor in the universe.”

“W-well. That’s great to know.”

With a satisfied smile, Topsy Turvy fainted dead away. Shaking with laughter, Daring Do turned to Ditzy, spreading a wing in front of her mouth to keep Sparkler from seeing.

“Well, Love,” she proudly declared, “if that made her faint, your next little announcement would have given her a heart attack.”

___

“Grandpapa? Does it seem like the house is getting smaller?”

His mind awhirl with thoughts, Smooth Storm contemplated the hallway.

“Well,” he admitted, “I don’t remember Molossus ever having to duck down before.”

“Indeed,” Molossus said as he stooped under an arch, “Mistress Daring constructed the manor with my eventual size in mind.”

Dinky nodded, raising a hoof. Molossus and Storm stopped in their tracks.

“What is it, Mistress Dinkestra?”

Storm’s mouth hung open. “Honey, have you ever consider work in entertainment? You got the charisma thing down.”

A wide smile flashed momentarily across Dinky’s face. “Yeah, the trick is to act like Dad. Shushies! Aside from the dimensionally wibbly-whasits, the place-time fabric is going all bendy-wendy. Also, do you hear that sound like a radio coming on in the next room? There’s a thinger manifestwhatsing nearby.”

Storm turned to Molossus. “Did that make any sense to you?”

“Yes,” he responded with a shrug, “but I’ve had some experience.”

Three hearts skipped a beat as a doorway opened up down the hallway.

A black-cloaked pony walked out of the starfield, mist billowing out of the door around its hooves. “Oily” was the word that jumped into Storm’s head. Every inch of the pony was black, from its body-suit to its worn top hat. Every inch, that is, except for the beak-nosed white mask that turned in Storm’s direction. The blank stare in those eyeholes made Storm break into a sweat.

“Everypony,” he said, “I think we should run.”

“Run,” the dark shape croaked out.

Storm feebly grabbed for Dinky ineffectually, feeling Molossus tense next to him. The butler advanced with fists raised, but Dinky outpaced him. She galloped towards the dark figure as her grandfather’s desperate grasp only managed to touch her flank as she sped further and further away from the grand-daughter he remembered.

She skipped to a stop in front of the masked pony, who stood motionless.

“Say that again, please.” Dinky’s eyes studied the porcelain mask.

“Run,” it repeated in a questioning voice.

Rage filled Smooth Storm’s brain. After escaping from monsters, no mere pony was going to lay a hoof on his grand-daughter. Storm found the energy to fly, battering the air desperately.

“Don’t you dare-- “

The masked pony pulled a cane out of its cloak, stepping effortlessly to the side as it guided Storm into a nearby wall. Nodding, the masked figure raised the cane into a defensive stance as Molossus advanced with raised fists.

Everything stopped when Dinky said, “Daddy, stop it.”

Storm pulled himself into shape, parts of him cracking back in place as Molossus stood still, transitioning from bodyguard to butler instantly. A high-pitched crack made Dinky flinch as the porcelain mask was dropped to the floor.

“Daddy,” muttered John Doo-Smith. Bloodshot eyes scanned Dinky, blinking many more times than necessary.

“Yes.” Dinky nodded. “Daddy.”

John fell to his knees, forelimbs pulling Dinky close. “Daddy. Daddy. Oh Dinky, is this you? This time, is it really you? Am I really me?”

“Yes,” she said as she nuzzled him with her eyes closed. “You’re my Daddy. No one tells ponies to run like you do.”

A gentle wing touched John’s shoulder. “Hey, that was a neat trick. We really should... ”

“No.”

The word stunned Smooth Storm. Volumes were contained within it, a long record of pained nights and angry days. Carefully, Storm pulled his wing away.

“I am holding my daughter,” John spit out fiercely, “I intend not to stop.”

He shook as Dinky kissed his cheek. Molossus minded his responsibilities, pulling out a hoofkerchief as the bravest stallion he had ever met sobbed on the floor supported by a child.

Eyes still unfocused, John’s mind was seeing things a little clearer. “Thank you, Shortwide,” he said to Molossus as he accepted the offered fabric.

Chest puffed out, Molossus responded back, “You’re welcome, Mister Doctor Smith, sir!”

They let John stay like that for a few minutes until his noises became words again.

“Dinky,” he said as he wiped his eyes. “Dinky, I love you so much. I need you to promise me something.”

“Yes, Daddy?”

John shook more every time Dinky said the “D-word,” and couldn’t imagine a more wonderful way to be addressed.

“Dinky,” John started, breathing heavily. He held her tightly by the shoulders, daring the world to pull her away. “Dinky, I need you to promise me to always wash your hooves before eating.”

Dinky looked into her father’s eyes. Behind them was a beautiful, intricate machine that had suffered kicks and twists, repair in places by pieces that barely fit. It hadn’t broken yet, but it was close enough to need repairs, and needed a little bit of care before it ran at full power.

“I promise, Daddy.” She held him as tightly as she could. “I really promise.”

Storm cleared his throat.

“John? You went into the stars?”

Shaking his head, John realized that the world contained ponies other than Dinky. “Had to draw away the Nowhere Men. Took a bit to get back.”

Molossus noted Storm’s confusion. “Master Doo-Smith, how long did you spend in the spaces between?”

“Between. Oh. ‘Beyond the fields we know,’ and all that, right?” He scratched the bottom of his chin, his mouth forming words for several seconds before finding a voice. “Um. Five.” He paused. “Five years, I think.”

He slowly stood up, throwing the cape off of his shoulders. Storm stepped nervously from side to side.

“Well,” he said with a snort, “you certainly don’t look a day older.”

John turned to him, eyes unfocused.

“I do that. After awhile, you forget how to stop.”

Storm nodded to himself, arriving at a conclusion. “Molossus, would you take Dinky around the corner and keep a watch on? I have to talk to John.”

Nodding in reply, Molossus leaned down and gently picked up Dinky, shushing the suddenly frantic Doctor as his daughter was lifted away. John watched Molossus go as Storm walked up and placed a gentle wing around John’s shoulders.

“Poor Ditzy,” Storm said. “We never believed her about the Wizard of the Travelling Box. You’re really him, aren’t you John? You’re actually the Doctor.”

“Yes!” John’s eyes lit up as he turned to his father-in-law. “Yes, I... ”

Storm’s hoof to the face floored John, who lay on the floor for several seconds before staring at the drops of blood snapped him back.

“Well,” John said as he held a hoof to his nose. “Well.” An anger years in growing prepared to flare. “Before I react, what stupid, simple-minded reason would make your throw that punch, knowing who I am?”

“Because you’re the Doctor, and you left her. I love Dinky, but her ‘father’ was a monster. You can travel through time and space and you let my daughter rot for three years, married to that thing. She spent her whole life writing about you saving worlds and you couldn’t save her from a single pony.”

John stared off into nothing. Gradually, his eyes swivelled to Storm’s own.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I was lost. I swear by all the stars that ever were I will never willingly leave your daughter again, and I will always find a way back to her.”

The silence stretched out as Storm scrutinized the Doctor. Storm’s smile slowly reappeared as he shrugged.

“Hey, all right. I get it. We make mistakes.” He stretched his hoof out as he concluded, “If you ever hurt her again no one will ever find a body buried in a box in a cloud.”

He took the hoof that Storm offered him, and stood up. Wiping himself off, he offered his own hoof towards his father-in-law.

“Fair’s fair. Let’s try this. Hello. I was the Doctor. My name is John Doo-Smith, and for your daughter I gave up all of time and space. I was a Lord of Time, and chose to be a second-rate toaster repairpony for her. Do over?”

Smooth Storm shook his hoof and nodded. “You have my blessing, but I still think she’s settling for you.” His smile softened the slightest bit, evoking a crocodile finding the drinking hole at the gazelle Special Olympics.
John returned the smile with a wink. “I know she is. Now, let’s get the buck out of here and find my family.”

As the two stallions rejoined Dinky and Molly, John looked at the diamond dog with hesitation. He started to work toward the question he dreaded asking.

“Molossus,” he said innocuously, “how many servants live here?

Molossus puffed out his chest. “I’ve taken care of Mistress Daring alone for years. It’s always been just us, Doctor.

“Yes, but these things erase you from history! Shortwide, has it always been always just you?” That was what John didn’t say. He decided that he didn’t want to know, and nobody else should ever wonder.

Instead, John was silent. As they walked on, Dinky stepped close to him, giving him a reassuring hoof touch when he started to shake. Molossus used this opportunity to lean close to Storm’s ear.

“Master Smooth Storm,” he gently said, “Respectfully, I should let you know that the last time someone laid a hoof on the Doctor, I broke a steel wrench beating them.”

Smooth Storm swallowed as Molly and Dinky shared a chuckle.

“I have really good ears, you know,” she said.

Reproachfully, Mollssus nodded. “Of course.”

Dinky sighed. “Do they really think we weren’t listening?”

“Of course,” Molossus said as he smiled and patted her mane. “It’s kinder to let them believe that.”

The group stopped at the next intersection as John raised a hoof. His eyes flashed with concern as he regarded the hallway’s ceiling shrinking a full hoof in front of his eyes.

“I think,” he said as he tried to sound confident, “that whoever is causing this is about to take his singularity and go home. It’s working a number on the property values.”

“The ceiling’s really shrinking on the housing market,” Molossus replied with a nod.

Storm stared at the pair. “You can joke at a time like this?”

“Keeps you sane,” John Doo-Smith said with a sparkle in his eye. “Keeps you calm. A little levity is good because now we run!”

___

Elsewhere in the shrinking manor, Topsy Turvy contemplated the way her world was rearranging itself. Hallways shifted, ceilings lowered, and she paid them no heed. She was focused on the words of the last half hour.

“So,” she said for the seventeenth time in four minutes. “So... ”

By now, Ditzy only threw an aggravated look at the ceiling as they trotted on.

“Yes, Mother?”

“So, John is the Doctor. John is an alien. My daughter is married to an alien from an advanced, space-travelling civilization.”

“Yes, Mother,” Ditzy said with a polite nod.

“Point of fact,” offered Daring Do, “Also a time traveller.”

“Okay.” Topsy breathed in carefully. “Okay! Okay. I have a question then.”

Daring quizzically regarded Ditzy, who rolled her eyes and nodded. The two mares turned to face Topsy. Behind Topsy, Sparkler stopped walking while continuing to cast challenging stares at darkened corners, daring them to produce threats. With her daughter on lookout, Ditzy felt confident enough for a minute of question-and-answer.

“Shoot.”

Topsy bit her upper lip.

“Well, if he can travel throughout all of time and space... ”

Ditzy gestured with a hoof, pleading for her to continue.

“Yes, mother?”

“Well,” Topsy said after a sharp intake of breath, “why can’t you two afford a bigger house? I mean, he could grab sunken treasure, or sell moon rocks, or something.”

Ditzy’s mouth fell open.

Daring raised a hoof questioningly but put it back down with a shake of the head. “Topsy,” she finally concluded, “I cannot believe you have the gall to ask that considering what’s at stake. I-I... ”

Topsy wing-patted her on the head as she walked past her. “Honey, back in Trottingham you may try for a stiff upper lip, but back in the Bronxco we get chutzpah.” She smiled at the two stunned mares as she walked past. Topsy was strutting like a Miss Equestria contestants until the spear flew at her.

Even for a pegasus, whose race prides itself on reflexes, the pony brain isn’t fast enough to compose complex thoughts under stress. Topsy was barely able to think of the word “sharp” before the impact.

Then, all Topsy could see was gray.

She was still staring at gray and shaking when Ditzy placed a soft hoof on her shoulder and whispered, “Mom, are you okay?”

Show business reasserted itself into Topsy Turvy, and it told her that time for crying was alone in a dressing room. Topsy gingerly tapped the spear-point sticking out of the back of the now-impaled suit of armor. “Uh. Uhm-hmm. Okay. Good... good Sparky. Sparkler! Good job, Sparkler.”

Proudly, Sparkler reasserted her field around the armor. It pulled the spear out of its chest, mimicking gestures of obscene pain before it gave Topsy a salute and kept marching down the corridor.

Daring snickered. “Forethought, class, and style.” She gave Ditzy a sympathetic look. “My dear, aren’t you afraid some cradle-stealing time traveller’s going to whisk your baby away? It’s a family tradition, after all.”

Sparkler blushed.

Ditzy didn’t respond as she stared into the hallway ahead. She noted the empty display cases and bare podiums lining it. Biting her lip she picked up the spear and shook it, making several green sparks shimmer into existence as they fell away into nothingness.

“Telekinesis,” she noted. “Whoever this guy is, Auntie Daring, he’s a telekinectic in a house filled with weapons where the cabinets are suddenly all bare.” Ditzy took in a sharp intake of breath as she gestured to a stairwell up ahead nestled between two doors. “And if he attacked us now, I bet that means he’s down there.”

Daring stepped to the edge of the stairs and looked down. Staring into the gloom made the hairs on her neck raise up as her feathers rustled.

“Good,” she said with a twinkle in her eye. “Let’s do some spring-cleaning.”

Ditzy sighed. “Puzzle wob sideways barn waving.”

Daring nodded with a laugh. “I knew you’d say that,” she said before running down the stairs.

___

“Stay on your hooves or paws respectively, everyone.”

A single light illuminated the way down the stairs. John carefully stepped onto the floor, scanning the basement as Molossus’s flashlight scanned the room. Neglected crates stood in cobwebbed solidarity, creating a dusty maze that obscured the view of the sprawling room. Dead rats littered the floor, spaced among them shrivelled spiders corpses that had fallen out of their webs.

“Something psychic’s down here all right,” John said with a nod. “Smaller life forces tend to get snuffed out with enough mental fallout.” He shivered as he nearly put a hoof down on the remains of a particularly bloated rodent. “Awfully glad you had that torch, Molly.”

Leaning over Dinky protectively, Molossus inclined his head with pride. “Butler, sir.”

“You grew up good, ‘Shortwide.’ Careful now, everyone.”

Storm glided down onto the basement landing, sending a cloud of dust barreling away. As the particles enveloped the room a flurry of coughing and angry eyes greeted him.

Dirty and irate, John trotted over to his father-in-law with murder on the mind. “A little more stealth would be good, Storm, considering there’s someone down here who broke reality.”

Storm passed by him, bringing John’s slowly simmering anger to a boil. He leaned down to Dinky, wiping her nose with a wingtip.

“You okay, Little Slugger? Adventure not getting too much for you?”

“Ketchoo,” she answered as sarcastically as possible.

“Good,” he said with a smile, heedless of his son-in-law’s death glare. With the practiced cool of years of show business, he turned his grin to John. If he had been an actor in a low rent black-and-white film, Storm would have been fiddling with a cigarette and hitting on the leading lady, regardless of any attacking monsters made of paper-mache.

“So,” Storm said as he tapped a crate marked “EQUESTRIAN GUARD INTEL” experimentally, “are there any things in these boxes that would be useful?”

John righteous fury settled into a satisfied smile. “Yes. Well, kind of. Well, you could open the one you’re tapping.”

“Oh? Some kind of weapon?”

“That one?” John stepped carefully around Storm as he continued. “I think so. I dunno, Daring and I were tied up when it was activated. Tell you what, though. They had to clean up the ones who opened it with a bucket and mop.”

Storm’s tapping hoof froze in mid-air.

“Smelt faintly of mint, too. Can’t stand mint.” He turned back to Dinky, listening to her father with wide, awestruck eyes. “Never trust mint.”

Molossus carefully raised Dinky into his arms and followed after the Doctor. “Little Dinkestra,” he whispered into her ear, “I do believe your father is feeling like himself again.”

Storm stared at the crate before giving it the kind of pat that is usually accompanied by the phrase, “Nice doggy.” He whistled low before walking away. “Merciful Majesty,” he said softly.

“No,” John said as he turned, a haunted look in his eyes. “Don’t say that, Storm. She didn’t have any. I know. I was there.”

They moved through the stacks in formation, as stealthily as they could. John and Molossus moved with the grace of a lifetime of practice, and where thusly quite quiet. Unfortunately for them, Storm moved with the skills gained from several films he spent playing the square-jawed Equestrian Guardspony under fire, and his exaggerated movements knocked over a sarcophagus. The ponies Storm used to sneak up on used to be paid to look the other way, after all.

As the clattering sound of broken pottery ceased, John Doo-Smith settled a weary look at his father-in-law. “Athletes,” he whispered.

Storm very carefully stepped closer to his son-in-law, until they were standing eye to shades.

“Knock it off,” he said with gritted teeth. “Playtime’s over.”

John’s eyes searched the ceiling for patience. “Smooth Storm, the being we’re searching for-- ”

“Is psychic,” Storm said, poking John in the chest with a hoof.

“Psychic.” John rolled the word around in his mouth. “Oh. Psychic.”

“Psychic,” Storm repeated with careful pronunciation, “and we’re stealthily creeping towards him with a flashlight on.”

“Oh,” John said as his shoulders slumped.

Storm nodded. “Yep, I thought so. My daughter’s the one with the common sense.”

John’s hoof reached into his aged, now-patchwork trench-coat, pulling out a sonic screwdriver from a pocket filled improbably with rose petals.

“Well, then, Smooth Storm. It’s time to start the music.”

Aiming his hoof straight up, John sent a high-pitched pulse throughout the basement. The sound of decrepit generators filled the air with the clash of rusted gears as illumination filled every corner of the basement.

“It’s time,” John concluded as he spun his multi-tool like an Appleloosan gunslinger, “to light the lights.”

Dust began to shake off the nearby crates. Suddenly, tons of packaged artifacts and equipment skidded out of the ponies’ way. Within seconds, invisible hooves cleared the center of the basement, revealing a striped, wooden mask sitting on an ancient box. It slowly levitated into the air, glowing with a sickly green light.

“Yes,” it said in a voice that dripped menace in large globs, “why don’t we get things started?”

Molossus raised his flashlight defensively and Dinky’s snuggled into his neck.

“Daddy,” she whispered, “that’s the bad guy. Can we go home now?”

Resisting the urge to run, Storm leaned over towards John and spoke softly. “You know, I didn’t expect to swing this far in the other direction so soon.”

“Storm,” John said through gritted teeth, “it nearly kills me to admit it, but you were right. We’re dealing with a world-shattering psychic. What am was I going to do, sneak up on him and hit him with a brick?”

“Doctor,” the mask said. There were chapters of hate and scorn wrapped up into that single word.

“Mfalme! I could tell it was you.” John took a step triumphantly forward. “So obvious when you consider things.”

Storm’s eyebrows raised. “But you didn’t... ”

“Shh,” John hissed through smiling teeth. “Never let the baddie know he’s one up on you. Makes them insufferably smug.”

Mfalme’s masks dipped back and forth as laughter boomed throughout the basement.

“I told you,” John remarked. “There’s the smug.”

“Daddy?”

John turned to Dinky. “Yes, my pride and joy?” Suddenly his eyes went wide with shock. John stuck a hoof in his mouth, turning back to Mfalme with fear in his eyes.

The mask levitated forward, closing the distance between it and the Doctor. “Go ahead,” it said in a patient tone. “Explain it to her. I want to hear what you say to,” Mflame’s voice suddenly lowered, stretching the words out with malicious glee, “your daughter.”

As Storm snorted, John took a step back. “Oh, no. No. Not fair. Mfalme, that’s not fair.”

“Daddy,” Dinky asked worriedly as Molossus tightened his grip, “are you scared?”

Molossus silently leaned down onto one knee as John stepped toward him. He carefully placed Dinky on the ground before turning toward Mfalme and cracking his knuckles. John took no heed. The trembling Time Charger ruffled Dinky’s mane with a hoof. “Nothing’s wrong, dear. Everything’s going to be all right. I promise.” He swallowed. “I’d never let you get hurt.”

“Heh. I’ve heard that before,” intoned Mfalme with a chuckle as crates exploded, pieces of wood flying through the air toward the mask. Splinters twisted and entwined into a wooden, equine body. “Comfort your daughter, Doctor,” the zebra-thing announced as it reared back. “It’s more than I was able to do.”

Smooth Storm began pawing the ground, his wings flaring out.

Dinky quickly caught her breath. Can’t look scared while Daddy’s working. “Is he a zombie zebra?”

Despite the tight pit of cold fear in his stomach, John Doo-Smith laughed.

“What? No! Of course not!” He waved a hoof dismissively before using it to wipe the sweat of his brow. “Don’t be ridiculous. Mfalme is a powerful psychic. He’s been using his powers to keep his mind working for decades on willpower alone, feeding off other being’s psychic energy.”

“Oh.” There was a pause. “Daddy?”

John leaned in, tears in his eyes. He could sense the tense form of Storm preparing to charge, but his intellect wasn’t in control. John was too focused on placing his hooves on his daughter’s cheeks, feeling the warmth under skin. “Yes, my most wonderful joy and muffins?”

Molossus idly picked up a crate and hefted it over his head. “You ready, Master Storm?”

“Yes,” he spat out. “Let’s buy those two some time.”

John’s mind’s registered the stamping of hooves and paws and the cracking of wood, but as he held Dinky’s face, neither of them looked away.

Dinky rolled her eyes. “That means he’s both a zombie zebra and a vampire zebra, Daddy.” She poked her father’s nose with a small hoof. “Silly Daddy.”

“No, it… well, I guess it kind of does. All right, he’s a zombie-vampire zebra.” He turned his gaze away from Dinky with effort comparable to jogging away from a black hole. “Now, let’s-- ”

John grabbed Dinky and rolled to the side to dodge Storm, flying fast and unconscious. The pegasus-shaped projectile impacted through a crate, sending a cloud of sawdust and gems scattering about. Turning toward the origin of Storm’s flight, he saw Molossus standing astride a heap of broken boxes, his tuxedo falling off of him in tatters. Gripping a totem pole like a diamond dog gemball bat, he hammered it down on a wooden zebra. The monstrous construct only laughed, rearing back to smash the straining diamond dog in the chest with unyielding hooves.

Molossus raised an arm to his chest in defense before swinging it out out, his backhand knocking the grinning golem off its hooves. As it kicked out on its back, Molossus stepped forward and grasped a hind leg with both hands. A pained groan rose out of his throat as he strained. Suddenly a crack reverberated throughout the basement as he tore the leg off into the air.

“Hmm,” Molossus snorted in triumph. “Not a wrench, but it’ll do.”

As the masked zebra snarled, it turned onto its side. Kicking out its back stump, splinters of wood began to shoot into the limb, reforming into bones, muscles, and hooves. Molossus roared as he began smashing the reforming limb with the previous one.

“Get to Storm,” John muttered as he threw Dinky onto his back and ran. “Must get to Storm.” He galloped at full tilt into the maze of crates, skidding to the side to dodge a stone idol throne out of the titanic melee behind him.

At the end of a makeshift row of storage containers, Storm’s legs dangled helpless out of a broken box, sawdust spilling out over his rump. Dinky whimpered as her father carefully placed her down. John bit Storm’s tail, yanking back as hard as he could. The prostrate pegasus slid out into the pile of sawdust, groaning. He rolled over onto his back, covering his eyes with one hoof as his other felt around for his glasses.

“Come on,” John snapped as he nipped Storm’s shirt and pulled him upright. “That was a damn foolish thing to do. Dashing and silly and stupid.” He smiled and sighed as his father-in-law rubbed eyes filled with sawdust. “You may be cut out for this after all, Smooth Storm. I’m seeing you with new eyes.”

The two Doo-Smith’s took a step back as Storm snorted out a dusty cloud before laughing like a madstallion. He was still snorting out wood debris as he cleared his face. “Okay, ‘Doctor.’ Maybe I’ve got a new pair to show off, too.”

He looked up. As an experienced chronal traveller, John would have sworn that time stopped in the second. He knew his hearts skipped a beat as he stared into his father-in-law’s eyes. Bereft of his sunglasses, Smooth Storm stared back as well as he could with his two gold eyes rolling in different directions.

John gasped as he stared in Smooth’s misaligned two golden orbs. Smiling, Storm offered his hoof.

“So, do-over indeed. Hello, John. I’m Smooth Storm. Let me just say, waffle neurotic harpist therefore larch.”

“What?” John shook his head in denial. “What? How... how hard did you hit that crate?”

Storm only giggled. “Come on, you know genetics.”

“What? But your wife is always trying to-- “

Storm nodded. “I learned to live with it. I took up radio as a kid to deal with the speech thing. Got the shades to cover the eyes. That’s why I know Ditzy doesn’t doesn’t need an operation. It’s why I secretly asked my aunt to cut us off. My daughter can handle this.”

Dinky took a step closer, examining her grandfather’s face. Her brow furrowed as she aimed a hoof at him accusingly.

“My mommy,” she pronounced with gravity, “is still the most unique mare in the universe.”

Storm hugged her tightly. “Granted.”

“Huh.” John tapped his chin. “But you’re not a genius”

“I thought that this was a do-over for us,” Storm said, tensing up.

“No, I mean Ditzy is. A genius. Like more than any other pony. Your genes and Topsy’s genes must have-- ”

“Daddy!” Dinky’s stage whisper exploded with excitement. “The smashy sounds have stopped.”

“Oh. Good,” said Storm.

“Oh, bad,” replied John. “When a ranty villain goes silent, it means he’s changed tactics. I should have realized; I had a whole conversation without being interrupted.”

A massive shadow loomed over the ponies. Silently, they turned to the dusty diamond dog.

“Master Doctor,” Molossus said. “It’s safe to come out now.”

Dinky whimpered as she backed into Storm, who covered her eyes with his wings. John stared in fear at the blood-covered butler.

“I-I don’t t-think so,” John said at last.

Molossus’ head flopped to one side. “Why would that be, Master Doctor?”

John bit his lip.

“Because, your mouth isn’t moving, and you’re glowing slightly green.”

A victorious laugh filled their minds as the limp form of Molossus was thrown into the air, landing splayed among them. The wooden wall before them parted, revealing a giggling ghoul made of a mask, splinters, and sawdust.

Storm rolled Molossus onto his back. “John?” He words came out haltingly and unsure. “John, is he...? ”

Sneering, John drew his multi-tool and stepped forward. “No, he’s not. His heart can’t have stopped. It’s too big.” He aimed the sonic screwdriver into the air and was rewarded with the creaking of metal. Sparks flew in every direction as a mass of iron and lights crashed onto Mfalme, scattering his bits. The mask hovered in the air, spinning as pieces of wreckage began slowly drawing toward it.

John snarled as he stepped back, drawing an arc through the air with his beeping wand. Dozens of screws on a lead ceiling pipe popped out, leaving the metal monstrosity to swing through the air freely. It smashed into Mfalme, scattering the reassembling body and sending the mask spinning before it imbedded in a stone sculpture.

“Go on,” said John as he advanced on the mask. “I’m a poor repairpony with a screwdriver in a room of unsafe equipment. Just see what I can do.”

The glow of the mask flared. “Enough of this!” The statue exploded, its dust hovering in a frozen clouded before shaping itself into the floating neck of a zebra. John flung his forelimbs in front of his face to block the shrapnel as countless statues in the basement erupted into fragments, the dusty clouds spinning through the air into the Mfalme’s congealing mass.

“You took my kingdom from me, Doctor!” The booming voiced screamed in frustration.

John rolled to the side as a still-forming stone hoof the width of a tree trunk stamped onto the ground. “Come off it. You tried to turn a wise nation of philosophers into a conquering army.” John sprung to the side to avoid a titanic kick. “It was a doomed relationship from the start.”

“You turned my daughter against me,” intoned the elephant-sized stone zebra as it tried to trample the sprinting Time Charger. “You-- ”

It stopped talking as a small piece of masonry sped through the air and bounced off the mask. The behemoth stopped. It lowered its neck until the mask was eye level with the still and defiant Doctor.

“You... threw a brick at me?”

John shrugged.

Mfalme cackled. “There must be only one pony on this planet stupid enough to thrown a brick at a psionic jugger-- ”

He stopped mid-sentence as a purple-glowing chunk of wall the size of a cart slammed into his head.

“Great work, Sparkler!” Ditzy gestured towards the staggered titan from the top of a wooden stack. “Hit him again!”

Sparkler rose into the air on a glowing stone platform. “Absolutes!” With a grin and an incline of her head, the teen propelled bricks, pipes, and stone into the mask. It stepped backwards under the assault.

“I love my family,” John said with a sigh. “Girls, great work! Keep hammering him until he loses concentration.”

Ditzy smiled at her husband’s voice until until her her eyes saw him struggling amidst the debris. “Oh, John!”

Topsy landed on Ditzy’s precarious perch of pallets. “What? What’s wrong? The big lawn ornament didn’t squash him, right? I mean, I didn’t miss that, I think.”

Ditzy’s chin trembled as she noted the weeks of stubble on her husband’s chin and the extra inches on his mane. “He’s been ‘unstuck,’ Mom. It’s... it’s time traveller talk. He’s been bounced around in time for a while since dinner.”

“How can you tell?” Topsy blinked, stepping forward and peering at John in curiousity.

Ditzy sighed. “I shave a distinctive pattern into his coat everyday,” she lied.

“Got it,” Topsy said as she tousled Ditzy’s mane. “My brilliant girl. Should we do something like that to the kids, too?”

Ditzy’s mind stopped, checked all the dials, made some adjustments, and finally approved the conclusion. She realized with a grin that her mother now believed every word she said. With a spring in her step, she took to the air.

“Come on, Mom. We’re winning this. I refuse to die now.”

As they flew over the snarling spectacle, Mfalme’s eyes glowed. Jagged bits of pipe narrowly missed Ditzy and Topsy they looped around in the air.

“Watch out, love!” John called from the ground, both hooves on the side of his mouth. “He’s a powerful telekinectic!”

Ditzy’s eyes spun in exasperation as she and Topsy dropped a few feet of altitude to dodge a headless statue. “Thank you, John! I never would’ve realized that!”

“Feh,” said Topsy. “Husbands. Think they know everything.”

Mfalme stormed through the cellar, shattering containers underhoof. As they exploded, they coalesced into lines of Zebrican warriors. “You can’t hide, Doctor!” He screamed, far past the edge of sanity. “Not when my legions reappear!”

“They were never that good in the first place, dear king,” drawled an amused voice behind him.

Past the point of coherent banter, Mfalme turned towards Daring’s voice. She walked calmly between her scattered possessions, finally stopping to offer Mfalme a wink.

The resulting scream shook the timbers of the manor as he formed a spear made of concrete, bricks, and hate. It flew towards Daring, embedding in the crate behind where she just stood.

“This is it, Mfalme,” Daring’s mocking voice called out. “This is my worst day, and you still can’t touch me.”

“Seize her!” Mflame roared as the zebrican constructs scattered throught the basement. His attention drawn away from the spear, he failed to see the blood drip off of it onto the floor.

As the girls drew Mfalme’s ire, John jogged his way back to his family. His mood soared as he saw Storm helping Molossus to his feet. The diamond dog was breathing with pain and effort, but he was able to stand. Dinky stood behind him, nuzzling his leg as he gently patted her head.

As John moved, Sparkler’s glowing stone platform dropped out of the air next to him, keeping pace easily. “Father,” she asked. “What is just happening?”

“Mfalme.” John breathed heavily, wavering back and forth as he reached Dinky’s side. “Mfalme... transferred his consciousness into a psionic entity, and he’s now creating sapient psionic constructs of his dead followers, probably by drawing on our applicable memories of how they were in life.”

Sparkler nodded. She immediately turned to Dinky.

“Sister, what happened?”

“The vampire zombie zebra made some ghosts,” Dinky said with a smile.

Sparkler nodded as John rubbed his eyes. “Dinky, if I wasn’t so proud of you for understanding and explaining that I’d be more exasperated.”

‘Kay!” Dinky paused. “What’s exasperated? You, Mommy, and Cheerilee use that one a lot.”

“Tell you when you’re older.”

Dinky nodded, thinking about the large dictionary in her home.

As Molossus leaned against a makeshift wall, Storm walked over to John. “Okay, so he was psychic while he was...” He looked at Dinky nervously. “While he was. Why won’t he stay... not? How can we ‘not’ him?”

As he spoke, Sparkler gasped at her mother’s eyes rolling around on her grandfather’s face. Storm gave them an extra twirl for her benefit.

“Well,” John said as he caught his breath. “Hmm. Well.”

Dinky giggled. “Daddy, you’re as silly as Mommy says sometimes.”

He swiveled, staring at her with anticipation. She stuck her tongue out at him before snorting.

“You’re awfully calm, Dinky,” he said.

She shrugged. “It’s just a monster, Daddy.” Dinky rolled her eyes. “Seriously, it’s not like its Diamond Tiara or anything. Anyway, all you have to do to ‘not’ a vampire zebra is drive a stake through his heart.”

His shoulders slumped. “Little Muffin, if you ever say that monsters shouldn’t be taken seriously again, I promise, no more family trips.”

John Doo-Smith sighed. He had expected one of those “out of the mouths of foals,” moments. “Honey, he lives on psychically-refined willpower. You can’t just... “

He stopped, lifted his daughter in his forehooves and kissed her on the nose.

“You’re a genius! That’ who you are, my genius girlie!” He spun his daughter in a circle, drawing a spate of giggles. “His heart! Brilliant! You’re the most wonderfully brilliant girl who ever lived!”

Dinky snorted. “Of course I’m a genius. Look at my Mommy.”

As Storm stared in uncomprehending wonder, John continued nuzzling Dinky.

She sighed. “Daddy, go save the day. You’re embarrassing me in front of Grandpapa.”

John blinked. “Right.” He passed his daughter to Storm. “Here, take over. Run if anything sounds like an imminent explosion. Sparkler, start gathering really big things in case this doesn’t work.”

As John ran back toward the fray, Dinky looked at Storm pleadingly. “Grandpapa, could you put me down?”

He looked at her before pulling her even tightly into his grasp. “No. Little Muffin, I don’t think I can.”

John crept low, ducking under the protection of the scattered debris as dust and shards flew past his head. Turning toward the melee, a wing weakly grabbed him from inside the hollow wreckage of a box.

“Doctor,” Daring said weakly. “Doctor, listen. Scarlet... Bloom.”

John looked inside at the trembling mare. He very gently kissed her, rubbing his hoof down the side of her neck lingeringly as he pulled away. “Shh. Stay here. You’re delirious. Shortwide will be here with the plane very soon. I’ve got to go. Got to save the world.”

As he left Daring blushed, shivering slightly. Suddenly, she weakly slammed her hoof into the side of the crate as he disappeared from view. “Oh, for pity’s sake,” she whispered. “Doctor!” She cried out as she tried to drag herself out of her shelter. “Doctor, I am not bloody delirious! Before you die on me again will you please listen to me? It’s about your -- ”

Hearing wooden hoofbeats, she pulled herself back into the darkness.

“How did you ever manage, Ditzy?” Daring Do grumbled. “That stallion is impossible.”

In the middle of the room, the mad giant was laughing now as it spun stone after stone at Ditzy and Topsy. Ditzy’s lungs burned in her chest as she strained to speak while flying. “Mom, watch out. There’s a wave of rocks coming... ”

Ditzy suddenly yelped as her wing collided with a support pillar. Topsy dived at the sound, wrapping her limbs around Ditzy as they dropped.

“My poor scatter-eyes,” Topsy said while shaking her head. “You did great for someone with your condition.”

Ditzy shook her head as Topsy’s words flew through her brain. “Mom! Slow down! You can’t let us crash. I working shower gellbiflorbit king!”

Topsy flung her wings downwards, straining to reassert control. As the hard basement floor rushed up at them, Topsy used the very the last second to spin around, using herself as a cushion for Ditzy.

Ditzy rolled unto the ground. She shook her head, only a little bit dizzy from the impact. Her eyes snapped open. “Mom? Mom, are you okay?”

The pile of orange hair and feathers groaned. “I swear, Bubbeleh, you’re going to be the death of me one day.”

As Mfalme’s hooves shook the foundations of Daring Manor, John Doo-Smith calmly stepped in front of the giant.

“Stop it,” he said. “We’re done. No more of my family gets hurt today.”

The stone titan peered down at the defiant Time Charger. “Why? Why should I not punish you for poisoning my own daughter against me?”

“Because you’ve won.” He flung his forelimbs, spinning in a circle as wooden Zebras closed in on him. “Look at the level of basic awareness you’re placed into these simple constructs. Truly, you are the most gifted psychic the world has ever known.” He stopped, looking away from Mfalme as a cruel grin stretched across his face. “So, what if you focused on just one?”

Mfalme paused. “Go on.”

“Well,” John said as he leaned against the crazed king’s leg. “If you focused on just one entity, you could infuse it with the shared memories of multiple individuals, Your Majesty. Give it full sapience and independent identity.”

Mfalme straightened. Wordlessly, his eyes gleamed with emerald light as the zebrican soldiers collapsed. In the midst of the psychic storm, a single equine body was weaving itself into existence.

Daring panted as she leaned on a crate, staring into the storm. “No,” she whispered. “Please don’t let him do this.”

With a final burst of light, a beautiful wooden zebra mare stood in the middle of the settled chaos. Eyes made of bark and stone blinked in wonder.

“My daughter,” Mfalme cried in triumph. “My daughter returns, Doctor! Now, we can rule this land together.”

The Doctor shook his head as she stepped towards him.

“Doctor,” she whispered.

He breathed deeply. “I’m sorry, Mailaika. I’m so sorry.”

She nodded, turning her face upwards. “Father.”

The mask nodded. “I have transcended the bonds of flesh and time, my little bird. Now, let us-- ”

“Let us die, Father,” said the Princess.

Mfalme shook, bits of debris falling of him. “What treachery is this, Doctor?”

Mailaika ran a gentle hoof down the stone pillar of her father’s leg. “Let the past stay buried, and stop inflicting your hate on the world for me. I do not crave it.” She looked back to John. “Doctor, it is I who am sorry.”

He nodded silently with wet eyes before turning around. “Mfalme, that’s it. Show’s over.”

The beast reared back, slamming its hooves into the ground. John and Mailaika were thrown backwards as Mfalme screamed.

“What have you done to her, Doctor?”

John pulled himself to his hooves with a minimum of bone-shaking pain. “I did nothing. But that’s your own memories you just kicked away, Mfalme! Your own thoughts and feelings made her! That means that, deep down inside, you know what that beautiful creature would have wanted. You know that you need to stop existing and your daughter would agree!”

The Princess tried to stand, but her shattered limbs cracked underneath her. “Father,” she said with effort, her throat nearly torn away. “Stop hurting me, Father.”

Mfalme stopped.

In every way, Mfalme stopped.

John’s eyes went wide as the giant equine above him began to collapse like a giant equine pinata filled with warriors. He leapt out of the way of a falling leg before pulling himself to his feet. Standing, he turned to see nothing but a pile of rubble.

Okay, he thought, briefly closing his eyes. Seven. Please, seven. I don’t know if this helps, but please make it seven.

John turned, holding his breath.

Molossus limped along the rows of wreckage, walking on a crutch of debris held together by a purple glow. Sparkler held her head high next to him, Dinky on her back. Nearby Topsy walked shakily, leaning on breathless Ditzy.

“Five,” John said with a gasp. “No, not five. Five’s not good enough.”

From a pile of dust a wing rose into the air. Smooth Storm coughed as he stood, lifting the other wing that was wrapped around his aunt. Daring Do weakly pulled herself upwards, one wing grabbing Storm’s shoulder and the other held in a bleeding patch of her flank.

“Daddy,” Ditzy said, turning pale. “What’s with your eyes?”

Storm sighed. “Yeah, there’s a conversation I’m looking forward to.”

“Seven,” John whispered breathlessly, falling to his knees. “Oh, yes, yes, seven!”

Dinky hopped down off of Sparkler as the pair lifted their father up. “Daddy, what happened?”

John pulled his girls tightly against him as he shook. “You said it. He was a vampire zebra. You kill a vampire by destroying his heart, Dinky. No matter what, a father’s heart is always his daughters.”

Ditzy smiled, lifted the fallen mask out of the debris in a quivering wingtip. “And this?”

He shrugged. “It’s just a mask, now. Harmless.”

Daring nodded. “Of course.” She coughed into Storm’s wing, then lifted her head. “Sparkler? Be a dear and do your me the honor, wouldn’t you?”

“Of course, Grand Aunt,” Sparkler said with a smile. Without leaving her father’s embrace, her horn flickered as the wooden mask imploded, crumpling in on itself until it was a small cube of sawdust.

“But,” the Doctor said rolling his eyes, “I guess there’s no harm in making sure.”

___

Minutes later found the Doo-Smith clan upstairs in the living room, laughing as they lounged on the couches. Having tucked in his aunt with a blanket, Smooth Storm walked over towards his wife. He briefly dodged one of several levitating drink trays (Sparkler having offered to help the injured Molossus) before reaching Topsy. Spinning her away from her conversation with the reclining Ditzy, he pulled his wife into a passionate kiss.

“You know, honey,” he said as he pulled back briefly. “I have it on good authority that our daughter’s a genius because of you.”

“Well,” she replied with a smile while she wrapped her wings around her husband’s neck. “Tell me something I don’t know.”

Dinky stuck her tongue out and blew a raspberry. “Ugh. Why does the end of an adventure also become kissy-face time?”

Sparkler’s tail pat her on the head as she past, a tray of appetizers balanced on her head. “My sister, do not knock it yet. I for one plan on trying it as soon as we get home.”

Dinky made gagging sounds as she crept up on her father and Daring, relaxing on the side of the couch. They laughed at some whispered joke as their great aunt poured a drink with her wings.

“Well, that was an adventure,” Daring exclaimed. “A toast, to impending retirement! May more of our kind live to see it.”

John nodded. as he checked the bandages on her side. “Yep. Gonna kick back in Cloudsdale, now?”

Daring nearly spit out her drink. “Cloudsdale? Can’t stand the place. If I recall, you and your jealous little box tended to fall right through the clouds. That’d make visits dreary, don’t you think?”

As the two giggled, Dinky bit her lip. “‘Priceless things,’” she said to herself while trotting up to her Grand Aunt, her mind racing with recent memories.

“Mommy? If Auntie Daring’s a pegasus, why does she live on the ground?”

“She always told me that the sky bored her. You don’t find priceless things on top of clouds. They tend to fall right through.”

“Grauntie Daring,” DInky asked innocently, “did you used to date Daddy?”

John blew a mouthful of champagne out over the couch as Daring laughed. She looked at Dinky with pleasure.

“This one is the sharp one, John. Keep an eye on her.” She leaned forward. “Yes, my dear. Yes, I did. That is why I am so happy he found someone as wonderful as your mother.”

Dinky nodded with a smile. “Thank you.”

Daring blinked. “For what?”

“Not treating me like an idiot,” Dinky said as she walked off with a spring in her step.

John said nothing as Daring shook with silent laughter.

“Daring, darling,” he said suddenly.

She sipped her glass, regarding Dinky with a curious eye. “Yes, Doctor?”

“I practice.”

To her credit, she didn’t say “What?” Years of experience taught her to smile and wait for the Doctor to explain himself.

“You asked me once if I was prepared to wait by Ditzy’s bedside. I... I reasonably expect to know when I’d have to. I caught a vague, fleeting glimpse at a memorial statue of her erected on some planet or another in the centuries between visits. Big thing, you’d like it.” He swallowed.

“You naughty boy!” She gestured reproachfully at him with her drink. “What about your rule regarding spoilers?’”

John shrugged. “I made a wrong turn at the restroom! That darn tourist map was useless.”

“My poor Doctor.” Daring reached over and ran a single feather down his cheek. “Always getting lost.”

“Anyway,” he continued, “I think I know the day. I practiced. I tried waiting outside the room. Didn’t work. I managed to get down the street, just within view of the hospital.” Bleary eyes pierced into her, begging for some kind of absolution. “I can’t bear to go in. I know I’ll have to one day, but I can’t do it yet. I’ll have to someday. I shouldn’t have to do it twice”

Daring threw both forehooves around his neck. “My dear Doctor. My poor, dear, lonely Doctor. Does she really deserve you?”

This time he didn’t need to think. “Yes,” he replied immediately.

Daring smiled. “Then I am more proud of her than I could ever say.” She sighed. “We’ve lived long lives, John. It’s good to be proud.”

“True. So many experiences. Submerged temples. Zeppelins. Things we shared. Things we missed out on.”

Daring raised an eyebrow.

“Well,” he said with a nervous hoof wave. “Children. I’m glad you married, but it would have been fun to see Mommy Daring at work.”

Daring gently put down her glass. “I had a child, John.”

“Oh, I missed that?” John poured himself another glass. “Strong Song must have preened all over his kilt that day. I always told that spunky young hooflander that he’d make a fine father.” He raised his glass for a swig.

“It was before I was married, John,” she said softly. “After you left.”

The glass fell out of his hoof into his lap before rolling off onto the floor. He sat still. He didn’t turn to her. At least, it didn’t feel like it. It felt like the universe turned him.

“What happened?”

“I raised her on my own while her father went to war. He... didn’t come back quite the same. When he left, he was the most courageous, brave, kind and gentle stallion I knew.” Her wings drew back. “When I saw him next, he was a brash, loud, bore of a stallion. The boy I loved was gone.” Her trembling hooves put down her drink on a table. “Lately, I feel like I’ve found him again.”

John’s eyes begged her to continue.

“We loved each other and fought constantly. She was so headstrong and stubborn.” A prideful smile flashed on Daring’s face. “I hadn’t been ready to settle down yet. Life was a trial and an adventure for us. Eventually, she was old enough that she could run away. She was good at running. Picked that up from her father.”

John leaned over, placing a hoof gently over Daring’s own. “What did you name her?”

Daring Do looked into her glass. “Scarlet Bloom. I named her after my favorite flowers.”

“The ones... in your room.”

“Yes, John.” She patted his hoof. “They help me remember the best times.”

John leapt to his feet, drawing glances from the rest of the family. “Where is she? She still is where, right? Please? Please.”

Daring’s face froze. “She took off on the relaunch of the H.M.S.Courageous. She grew up hearing stories of that ship.”

“No,” whispered John. “Please don’t... don’t say this to me. I don’t deserve-- ”

“She was supposed to be on it when it crashed into the canyon,” she continued conversationally.

John’s knees buckled. “Please.” Ditzy began to stand as she saw John shaking.

Daring lifted her drink. “Strange affair. They never found any trace of her.” She raised an eyebrow. “Or, even more bizarrely, her luggage. It had apparently disappeared out of the still-sealed and recovered cargo compartment, somehow. So did her favorite painting of all time, from the empty captain’s cabin.”

John blinked. “No! Really.” He started to grin, tears flowing freely. “Really? Please, please really?”

Daring’s wings gently circled him. As he pulled him closer, she whispered into his ear, “Really. John Doo-Smith, I swear that whenever you find her, regardless of whoever you are at the time, if you don’t bring her back to visit before my end... ”

“You’ll hunt me down and kill me?” John asked with a grin.

Daring smiled. “I’m getting too old for that, and you’d just shrug it off anyway. I’ll do something that sticks to you particularly; I will be very disappointed. I’ll keep my schedule free, as it is.”

John Doo-Smith, last of the Time Chargers, the Oncoming Storm, the Bringer of Shape and the Shaper of History, collapsed into Daring’s forelimbs in an incomprehensible fit of joyful crying. He raised his sniffling head as he felt Ditzy’s hoof on his shoulder.

“Ditz’ Do! Luv’ you so much!” He squeezed her like an over-affectionate python.

“Urgh!” She wiggled out of the hazardous hug. “John, I think it’s time to tell you something before you try that again.” She stuck her tongue out of the side of her mouth for a second as her head bounced back and forth in contemplation.

“John,” she finally started. “I was worried. I mean, actually worried that time.”

“What?” He blinked away the tears before snickering. “No. I mean, psychic projection and broken reality walls? That’s nothing out of the ordinary-”

A hoof closed his mouth.

“John, shut up for a second. I was worried because I’m pregnant!”

The entire room went silent. Sparkler clapped her hooves onto the ground as Topsy made almost words with her mouth.

“Well, now,” Storm said with a smirk. “I really didn’t think he had it in him.”

Dinky scratched her mane. “Does this involve the blue box, somehow?”

Molossus remained unruffled and unfazed. He was a butler; he had standards to uphold.

“We... I... you.. we did,” John sputtered out a semblance of sentences. “We certainly did! We’ll have to tell Wandering Star. She’ll want to be there for the birth. I mean, she lives two hundred years in the future, but that’s just commuting. She’s going to be a niece again!”

Ditzy grabbed her husband tightly. “Promise me we’ll go together.”

“I’m here with you,” he said with a nod. “I’ll always be here. I’m not leaving.”

Daring smiled as she patted him on the shoulder. “Good choice. You’re a good pony, John Smith. See your child’s birth. Raise her. I think that’s the greatest gift you could give. You have all the time in the world. Spend it with her while you can.”

Ditzy pulled back, throwing a skeptical look at Daring. “Her?”

Daring smiled enigmatically. “It’s a hunch. And it’s what you deserve.”

___

Days later, John was shaking unsteady hooves with his father-in-law on the steps of the manor as Molossus loaded their cart.

“I like you without your sunglasses. You remind me of someone.”

Storm nodded. “Maybe I’ll go public. Raise some awareness.”

“So. Um.” John stared at the countryside for a few seconds. “Visit when you can, you know.”

Storm nodded. “Sure, John.”

“Yep,” John replied as they launched into uncomfortable silence.

“Well,” Storm said, trying his best. “We may not have much in common... ”

“Do you like sports?” John interrupted, scratching the back of his neck.

Storm stared at the son-in-law he had finally accepted as not being an idiot.

“Because, you know, I have a time machine and box seats to every zero-g football game for three hundred years and just maybe I still have two tickets to the Bucklyn Dodgers’ first seven World Series.”

As the girls walked out of the manor, all their conversations ceased at the sight of John and Storm patting each other on the back and laughing.

Topsy’s mouth opened. “Bubbeleh, that is the most impossible thing I’ve seen this weekend.”

As the family gathered for good-byes, Dinky walked up to her father with a perturbed look. “Dad, we missed something.”

“Oh?” He gently slid out of Storm’s embrace. “What is that?”

“Where’s the part where we cure Aunty Daring?”

An uncomfortable silence settled over the family.

“Because,” Dinky continued, “if this were one of Aunt Daring’s novels the end would involve us curing her, so when does that happen?”

John closed his eyes. “One day, Dinky Doo-Smith, I had to stop living up to your standards. Dinky, this isn’t a children’s adventure novel. We don’t get to fix everything.”

Daring Do turned away, walking to the other end of the stairs. “Someone deal with this. I’m rubbish at children.”

Dinky’s eyes widened. “That’s not fair.”

Topsy bit her wing. “Oh, boy. Let me make something-- ”

“Mom,” Ditzy said with warning in her tone. “I’m her mother. I’ll take care of it.”

Topsy smiled. “Yeah. You will.”

Ditzy slowly walked down the stairs, scooping Dinky up into her wings. “Little Muffin, life’s only as fair as we make it.”

The coach driver nervously kept his mouth shut as he watched the heart-breaking scene, aware that a little discretion was sometimes worth a large tip.

“That means we have to visit a lot,” Ditzy whispered into her daughter’s ear. “Starting now.”

Dinky lifted her head. “How...how long?”

There was a pause, broken by Molossus. He carefully knelt down next to Dinky and used a finger as wide as her leg to wipe her eyes. “Many months. Respectable months. More than February-level months, maybe not so many Octobers-sized. We might be able to string them into a year or two.”

Sparkler, pale-faced and shivering, walked into the cart.

Dinky lifted her hoof to Molossus’ paw. “Thank you for being honest, Uncle Molly Moo.”

He froze. “Pardon me, young miss, could you please clarify?”

Dinky nodded. “Well, Sparkler needed a family, so she became my sister. You’re going to be alone someday, so I’m making you my uncle.”

Daring Do lingered on the edge of the estate steps, barely able to catch the tones of conversation. She closed her eyes, weary, leaning against the side of a statue of Queen Majesty performing some viciously humorous punishment on an enemy of Dream Valley. Suddenly, a sound that she thought could never exist entered her mind.

It was the sound of Molossus crying. Opening her eyes, she saw Molossus on his knees, shaking back and forth as he cradled Dinky in his arms. Her family was surrounding him, sharing some warm smile that she had opted out of. Even Sparkler seemed to be coaxing herself out of the cart. Daring’s breath caught in her throat as she walked forward. When Daring Do cleared her throat, she spoke with none of the hesitation she felt.

“I have no idea what’s happening,” she pronounced, “but this stupid old nag will not be left out.”

Dinky crawled out of the arms of the blustering Molossus after planting a kiss on his nose. “I was trying to tell Mommy and Daddy that maybe I should miss school tomorrow.” She turned to her parents with tears in her eyes. “And… Tuesday, maybe?”

“Oh, no,” exclaimed Ditzy. “She’s doing The Eyes. I told you Apple Bloom was trouble. You deal with this.”

John clicked his tongue. “You just want to skip your geography test. It’s always a bit hard when places are laid out side by side, innit?”

Daring neighed in anger, drawing the attention of everyone around.

“My dear family, no granddaughter of mine is doing poorly in geography.” She dug into the pockets of her dress, throwing a bag of bits to the cart driver. “Sir, please give us another hour. Molossus! Pack my things! We’re going on vacation.”

She breathed carefully. “That is, John Doo-Smith, if you have the room for an old...”

Daring Do’s mouth failed her as she noticed the Scarlet Bloom flower carefully stuck into the lapel of his trench-coat. He gently pulled her into his embrace with Ditzy.

“My dear Dorothea, I will always have a place for you.”

___

Cheerilee’s class’ attention was beginning to sway as Truffle continued to drone on about his vintage pickelhaube hat. Cheerilee smiled, her inner teacher’s mask slipping in place to hide the look of a mare low on sleep from grading and about to pass out.

“That,” she said while stifling a yawn, “was wonderful, Truffle. Okay, so who’s next?”

“Not Dinky,” snorted Diamond Tiara. “She’s been too embarrassed to show her face all week.”

As the class started whispering, Cheerilee found herself wishing that Celestia would grant her the power of lunar banishment.

“Now, Diamond, why don’t we give Dinky the benefit of the...”

“I’m here!” Dinky shouted as she ran into the class. She skipped to a halt in front of the lectern. “I’m ready for show and tell.”

Revelling in Diamond’s shocked look, Cheerilee nodded approvingly. “Well, Dinky, you’re just on time for it.”

“‘Course I am,” Dinky replied, “I’m a Doo-Smith.”

Diamond Tiara snorted. “And what weird thing do you have this week? Maybe the stupid talking teddy bear again?”

The class held its breath as the aged mare in the pith helmet walked into the schoolhouse. “My word,” she said, “is that snarling little brute what passes for a girl these days?”

“Wubba wah wo Darh-Do,” commented Cheerilee precisely, swaying on the spot with starstruck eyes. The captivated eyes of the class stared as the mare in the green vest sat down at the front of the class. She rolled her forelimb at Dinky, who nodded in return.

“Hey, everybody. This is my grand-aunt. Her name’s Daring Do.”

The sound of Diamond Tiara’s unconscious head slamming onto the desk was as sweet as Dinky could have imagined.

The Whooves Family Trilogy will conclude this summer in "Doctor Whooves and the Mare in the Moon!"

Author's Note:

Well, here we are again. It's really quite a pleasure. I think that now I've tried to kill John twice.

This was the hardest chapter I ever had to write. In my mind the seen in the beginning had to be perfect. I hope that you readers appreciate and enjoy the way I tried to entwine Daring Do and the Doctor's history together.

Thanks for all the support. I wouldn't keep writing without it.

Comments

[Blue_Paladin42]

I wanna say this now, before I go any further in the story. That first bit, between 5 and Daring, is in direct competition with the scene from The Three Whooves where Dinky keeps the bear-general company as he dies for the title of "most moving thing you have put on paper".

[Paleo Prints]

2540275
Whew. High praise. Thanks. I really wanted that, above all, to come through. In Doctor Who, we've seen so much romance swept under the rug. Sarah Jane's remark that she missed Mister Right made me want to see what I could do about a companion growing up around and falling in love with the Doctor.

Hmmm. Have I ever actually put this stuff on paper?

[Siras-chi]

I love all of Ditzy's titles.

[Ponibius]

Really great chapter. Lots of things going on all over the place. So many great lines all over the place that I have trouble picking any one out.

[Unimportant]

Ahh Diamond Tiara when will you learn? In every fic where you have even the slightest of antagonistic roles you always end up unconscious or shocked or told off or punished and then there was that one time with the fireworks and gasoline...

[Blue_Paladin42]

“You remind me of that blue unicorn that Miss Savory travelled with.”

He DOES, doesn't he.

“I mean, it’s been so hard for you with the eyes and words and brain thing, and you raised two lovely daughters.”

t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS-NcMEZQJsQeUJqZD6I5amV4rP5yAwyTWfQv8w4GSitclGU0v4Ug

A wide smile flashed momentarily across Dinky’s face. “Yeah, the trick is to act like Dad. Shushies! Aside from the dimensionally wibbly-whasits, the place-time fabric is going all bendy-wendy. Also, do you hear that sound like a radio coming on in the next room? There’s a thinger manifestwhatsing nearby.”

Oh lawdy, she really IS the Doctor's daughter! I could see her in my head making the Tennant Face and everything.

Dat Muppet Show reference.

Ok, the Uncle Molly Moo was pretty heartwarming too. And whew, Mfalme's defeat... Alas poor villian.
Ditzy's speech was brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
So, Ditzy gets her eyes from her daddy? I can honestly say I did not see that coming.
This whole story was, once again, incredible. I cannot wait until Mare in the Moon. Well, except I want more Chaos first.
The Queen Majesty? Celestia in her younger years?
When Dinky asked, "when do we cure Aunty Daring", I very nearly died.
Take that Diamond Tiara!
Scarlet Bloom. Feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeels. Was that from her little time with 5? Or later? From Daring's description, it sounded like 8 might have been the father.

[Blue_Paladin42]

OMFG
How have I not given this story a thumbs up yet?

[Cirrus Sky]

Uh, as much as I love this chapter, couldn't it have gone live yesterday? I have spent a furative hour trying to read this properly in work.

Anyway, as the good Doctor says :Allonsy!

Wonderful, fantastic and extra good. Well written characters and an excellent Doctor worthy of the greats themselves. Resolution that did not ring false, seamless intergration of time "zones" within the story and a baddie deafeat straight out of the better (non big-friendly-button) episodes.
With the endings slotted in they were fantastic but IMO it needed a moment of Rainbow or Twilightreacting to Daring. Though Cheerielee sufficed.

I look forward to the next episode

[blastdragon]

I love the moment Ditzy talked the Nothing down. It felt just epic on a scale normally only the Doctor can reach. But somehow the whole Doo-Smith family is pretty epic, no, that's wrong, not just pretty epic, no, the Doo-Smith family is: EPIC

[DireCorgiKnight]

By Celestia's unholy hair conditioner, that Royal Road/Knave of Cups bit.

Just. Wow. I can't. I really can't.

SPOILERS:
Paleo really did it. Just wow. This chapter, the Doctor's tears. Remember them if you read the Knave of Cups in its completion. If you don't, why didn't you? So much wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey disappoint if you forget any part of this chapter while reading the Knave of Cups.

[Shantara]

From the first to the last word, this was absolutely GLORIOUS! This chapter made me smile, grin, brought tears to my eyes. I have very little doubt I'll return here and re-read it many times in future!

Mare in the Moon, huh? Now I'm officially hyped.

[CaptainSanchez]

You see this concluding chapter? It's the greatest thing I've ever read. I'll be impatiently awaiting the debut of Mare in the Moon.

[SIGWolf]

2541262

So it was a proper Doctor story, then, eh?

[Shantara]

2541879
Sure it was! It felt like an awesome finale to an interesting story arc. ...and everyone lives!

I wish there was more stuff like this on TV... <insert rant here>

[Captain_Savage]

Near the end
25.media.tumblr.com/1c63b3ba7349f2a9f2572ed3120e209a/tumblr_mgsvtysMFT1rzm77eo1_500.gif

[Firebirdbtops]

I have yet to catch my breath from cracking up. I can't wait to hear the name of the newest Do-Smith! Also, has Dinky ever played with Screwball? I would think they could have a fun time together.

[Reedemption]

Just today I commented on Davidson's Mighty Demon Slayer Grooms Ponies latest chapter on how his work tied with you as my all time MLP favorites.
You just pulled ahead.
Specific little moments when I could hear the Doctor's theme as I read a passage? And the way that Queen Majesty pops up in both stories? Dammit, I need some G1 under my belt.
Also have to agree with Blue_Paladin on the amazing first scene.
Now, continue! Continue to compete for my favoratism!

[Paleo Prints]

2540585
Glad to hear it. I had the last chapter of Three Whooves criticized once for being radio play like in the final confrontation, so I wanted a lot more descriptions of the physical actions of the characters.

2540737
Glad Dinky works. It's hard to make a kid imitating their parent not just spew their parent's lines.

"The Queen Majesty? Celestia in her younger years?"

On RPG.Net, we have a pony thread that involves scans of the old comics. The subject of Queen Majesty often comes up. Queen Majesty will turn an enemy wizard into melting candy, or turn them into a drawing and paint over them. The Silver Age Spectre has NOTHING on the insane judicial madness of All-Powerful Majesty. She will wish you into the cornfield.

The thread is called something like "Jewels in your eyes to light your way home!" That's Majesty in a nutshell.

"Scarlet Bloom. Feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeels. Was that from her little time with 5? Or later? From Daring's description, it sounded like 8 might have been the father."upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/e/eb/Fifth_Doctor.jpg/200px-Fifth_Doctor.jpg
" He was dressed in wreckage from head to hoof, his once-white suit blackened, his collar garnished with a now-fried and unrecognizable vegetable. Holding on to the pile of used kindling that could arguably be called a hat, he walked to the edge of a sparkling crystal pool."

upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/b/b1/Sixth_Doctor.jpg
“When I saw him next, he was a brash, loud, bore of a stallion. The boy I loved was gone.”

Although, I really want to do something with Eight and Nine one day...

2541948
Yeah, I considering killing off a cast member, but I didn't feel like it fit the tone of the story. Molly came closest, but I grew to love the big galoot. And really, who wants and Indiana Jones story where Shortround dies?

2542759
High praise.

2542768
I have an interesting name picked out. It's a word that fits a girl and a pony with her background, but it's not a standard name by any means.

Dinky and Screwy... would be cool. Hmm....

[Blue_Paladin42]

2544573
It was the way she describes Scarlet Bloom's father as such a sweetie. Something that fits both 5 AND 8. 8 might have actually been the nicest of them.
I was just checking to make sure whether her little tryst with the Doctor at the chap beginning was what got her pregnant, or if it was later.

And you should do a story involving 6 sometime. I like the concept with 6, but it was poorly executed in the show.

[Paleo Prints]

2544819

"I was just checking to make sure whether her little tryst with the Doctor at the chap beginning was what got her pregnant, or if it was later."

My idea was that they spend the week together in the jungle, thus Daring's comments on giving Shortwide/Molossus the week off. I definately intended that period of time to be the start of the pregnancy.

[Blue_Paladin42]

2544877

Just makes the beginning that much better.

[Talon and Thorn]

A few random thoughts about this wonderful work.

Nice to the see the fifth Doctor getting some love, figuratively and literally, although as a Big Finish fan I don't think sixie is all that bad, I think he might have made a good dad.

Well the Whooves-Doo family tree is rather complicated isn't it, Scarlet is both the new kids second cousin(?) and half sister? Personally I'd like the baby to be a colt as the doctor already has a bunch of daughters (Is there a Jenny equivalent out there as well?).

Dinky was as always utterly adorable in every scene.

Nice to see Sparkler planning to give Kissy face a try, she needs the love.

I liked the idea that the house could have had loads of servants that were wiped out and we would never know, its rather creepy. Glad to see Mollossus survived and joined the family.

[Paleo Prints]

2555248
From the writer of "Canterlot Follies," I consider that high praise indeed.

[Paleo Prints]

2558014
See Tartaurus, prison-city of the minotaurs, in the first chapter of Chaos and Darkness!

[Borg]

Thanks, Mom. Okay, time to break family rule number one.

But Sexy isn't anywhere near here! And if she were, why would you fly her alone (assuming she even lets you) when that would presumably mean leaving your mom, great-aunt, and daughter right here in imminent danger?

My dear, aren’t you afraid some cradle-stealing time traveller’s going to whisk your baby away? It’s a family tradition, after all.

Most likely. But every good parent knows that one day, you need to let your children fly free and trust that you've prepared them well enough to not fall. And Sparkler is certainly prepared.

Where’s the part where we cure Aunty Daring?

Sometimes, Dinky, you're so adorable it hurts. Sometimes in a different way from other times.

[Paleo Prints]

2558977
But Sexy isn't anywhere near here! And if she were, why would you fly her alone (assuming she even lets you) when that would presumably mean leaving your mom, great-aunt, and daughter right here in imminent danger?

Might have to change it to "the family's first rule."

From chapter 1
A civil war raged inside Dinky. Her mind reminded her that her Daddy’s Rule Number Point Seventy-Five was “No bragging!”

So, overall opinion?

[Borg]

2559028 My overall opinion is that I eagerly await the release of Doctor Whooves and the Mare in the Moon, and that you are one of my favorite writers in the fandom.

[rem-dog]

So, Strong Song=Jamie McCrimmon?
Scarlet Bloom =Clara Oswin, perhaps?
Looking forward to the next installment!

[Paleo Prints]

2564553

Yes! First reader to nail Strong Song! I thought it was appropriate to marry off one of the Second Doctor's companions to another.

As for Scarlet...maybe. I want to write a story there, so I'm getting different ideas of her in my head.

[rem-dog]

2564806
You know, a lot of the fannon has Jamie and Victoria getting together, but then their minds were wiped, in the end, so that doesn't quite gel.

Hope to hear from C&D next!

[The Specialist]

While i'm not normally a fan of this take on the ditzy do, doctor relationship, this was written so exceedingly well I can't help but applaud. Read the entire story straight through, all because happened to see a rec on psychicscubadiver's page. Looking forward to the next story.

[Paleo Prints]

2574063
Thanks! I'm getting a lot of new readers, so I have a question. Did you read "The Three Whooves" first? I'm interested to know if House of Daring stands well on its own.

[The Specialist]

2574303

I read it a while back, I can't remember when, but I can't remember the details. I also wasn't much of a Doctor Who fan when I read it. I think the story does fairly well on its own, it is more or less self contained.

[FortunateKitsune]

*inarticulate flailing*

I really need to watch DW already...

[Aurucite]

Fmugle kumquat abacus!
You had me laughing through almost the whole story, and Dinky has officially become weaponized cute.
But you broke the butler! I can't believe you broke the butler!
I will be waiting for the sequel with bated breath. Thank you for this story.

[BadgerLord]

Are you secretly Steven Moffat?

[Dragonsword35d]

I just don't know why Diamond Tiara even tries any more. She just keep getting shown up.

*Edit* Actually, did we ever actually here Ditzy's reaction to A) learning her great aunt was a former companion, and more importantly that B) she was a former lover of the Doctor and actually had a kid? Which, doesn't make much sense in the first place, as by my recollection, isn't the Doctors entire race sterile?

[Paleo Prints]

2779861

I don't think I wrote that scene, but I'd love to save it for an embarrassed teen dinky sometimes.

Are Timelords sterile? If that's in the canon, how did the First Doctor have a granddaughter? I want to check that, but luckily enough as a fanfic writer I keep my own series bible.

[Dragonsword35d]

2780546
In all fairness, it was never said if that girl was adopted or not. He claimed she was his granddaughter, but you know the rule. The Doctor always Lies. Just fan speculation. And the fact that the Master referred to her as one the Doctor had rescued from civil strife. And before Rassilon, a woman named Pythia led the Gallifreyans. She was something of a seer and chose to sterilize the race in response to some of the shit her successor does. For a while, they used Looms, a creation of Rassilon, to "weave new life from genetic materials". Pythia's curse was supposedly lifted during the 7th incarnation, but you have the Doctor trapped here, so I am not sure how applicable that is. That is all I know on the matter.

[Paleo Prints]

2782044
There is a lot of continuity on the matter from later one. For me, the deciding factor is that the actors stated they always played their roles as if a family relationship was there. I love that scene )it's why I put it in Three Whooves),It makes the good-bye scene that much better for me.

Continuity? This is Doctor Who; we've had THREE Loch Ness Monsters!

[Paleo Prints]

2802824
I always think of a rip where the other side looks like a dead TV channel. That's why I describe the flickering.

Then again, it's one of those things we probably really CAN'T imagine, like Lovecraft's Colour Out of Space? What does new color look like? Dunno, and don't try to make a film adaptation.

[Drebom]

Really enjoyed reading these stories! loved Ditzy's parents' reactions to the doctor, and when Daring came in for show and tell at the end, Cheerilee and Diamond's reactions were brilliant! A really good laugh. Looking forward to the next adventure!

[Rated Ponystar]

Best ending ever

[Reader Wolf]

This family is awesome.

[Azusa]

Wait, this is finished? I don't remember EqD saying that it was.

[Paleo Prints]

2982849
Yup.

[Paleo Prints]

3002041
If mine ties with that, I'm doing something right.

[Paleo Prints]

3012290
BY the way, you might want to know that Sparkler not only has a scene in Hooves Holding Hooves, she's going to get a bigger one in the future: she's Lyra and Bon-Bon's babysitter.

[Paleo Prints]

3238886
Yup, a few months after.

[Dark_Eccentric]

That was a great ending. And yes, I did like how you tied Daring Do and the Doctor's past together. Kind f saw that coming, but the bit with Scarlet Bloom? That, I did not see coming, and for that I applaud you. And Ditzy making her announcement moments after, was just perfect. That part I had guessed early due to a comment from Daring.
Anyways though, amazing work.