Chapter 1: Happy Birthday Fluttershy
Fluttershy was hiding.
She was hiding from the most terrifying thing known to ponykind.
Nopony can outrun it.
Nopony can hide;
From a Pinkie Pie party on their birthday.
It all started about a week ago.
Fluttershy had gone into the town market to pick up a few ingredients for Angel Bunny’s newest and most delectable dessert. The streets were packed to the brim with ponies shopping; the air was rich with the smell of all sorts of baked goods being sold, but Fluttershy wasn’t there for her own satisfaction. She was here for her darling bunny Angel.
“Let’s see here. What do I have so far?” She looked at the small checklist that she pulled from her saddlebag.
1. 3 Carrots
2. 2 Heads of cabbage
3. 2 Tomatoes
4. 1 Bottle of whipped cream5. 1 Cherry
“According to this all I have left to find is the cherry. Oh, I just know Angel’s going to be so happy,” said Fluttershy. She couldn’t wait to make this salad for Angel Bunny. He had been asking for it ever since that incident with Iron Will; it would make him so happy, and nothing made her happier than when her animal friends were happy.
Fluttershy walked up to the cherry vendor, the pony being there being a blonde-maned pink mare, a cherry gracing her flank.
“Um, excuse me, I was wondering if you had any cherries left today.”
“As a matter of fact I do, but it’s my last one so it’s gonna cost you,” the vendor replied.
“How much?”
“Fifty bits.”
“F-fifty bits?” stammered Fluttershy.
“Fifty bits take it or leave it.” The vendor closed her eyes and turned around. Something was odd about the yellow pegasus.
“Oh. Well, I’m afraid I’ll have leave it. I only have 30 bits left.” said Fluttershy.
Fluttershy turned to leave.
“Wait,” said the Cherry vender bringing Fluttershy to a stop. “Aren’t you that famous supermodel Fluttershy?”
Fluttershy blushed.
“Yes, but that was a long time ago. I don’t model anymore.” Fluttershy preferred not to remember the days when she used to be a supermodel for photo finish. Even just thinking about it gave her anxiety.
“My daughter is a big fan of your work. Can I get a picture?”
“Well…I don’t like getting my picture taken. It bothers me for some reason.” said Fluttershy.
“Please, with a cherry thrown in?” said the Vender offering Fluttershy the last cherry.
Fluttershy reluctantly agreed, she would do anything for that cherry. The vender produced a camera.
“Alright say cheese.”
Fluttershy looked wide-eyed into the camera. Then there was a flash of light that made her flinch.
“Perfect!” said the Vender. Instantly the photo developed and the Vender took a look at it.
“Huh, that’s funny.” said the Vender.
“What is?” asked Fluttershy confused.
“The picture came out all distorted. Take a look:”
The picture was all pixelated and her face was blurred out making it look as though she had no face.
“That is weird want to try again?” Asked Fluttershy.
So they did, but every time they took a picture of Fluttershy the picture would come out distorted in some way or else the picture wouldn’t develop. They tried adjusting the shutter, and it seemed to work when she took pictures of anything else.
Except for Fluttershy. All the flashes were starting to give Fluttershy a headache.
"Stupid thing is broken. Sorry about that Fluttershy. How about you just autograph one of these posters instead?"
So Fluttershy put her hoof print on the poster the vender thanked her for the free cherry. And began to walk home when all of a sudden. Pinkie Pie.
“HEY FLUTTERSHY WACHA DOIN?” she said coming out of seemingly nowhere scaring Fluttershy half to death. When she recovered she answered the question.
“I’m getting some ingredients for Angel’s salad. How about you?”
“Oh I’m getting party supplies for your birthday party in a week.” said Pinkie Pie letting the words sink slip out. "Oops weren't supposed to tell you about that."
“A-a-a birthday party?” said Fluttershy disturbed. The idea of all of a sudden being the center of attention of a room full of ponies was absolutely terrifying to Fluttershy. For the last ten years Pinkie Pie had thrown her a surprise party on her birthday and every year she was startled out of her mind. “But-t-t-t”
“I’ll see you in a week.” Pinkie said trotting off back to Sugar Cube Corner.
***
Today
Today was the day of the party and Fluttershy was determined not to have a party. She had taken the necessary steps to make her home pinkie pie proof.
1. Fluttershy had personally sealed every crack in her walls
2. She had spent a good amount of money making her windows “bullet proof” (whatever a bullet was)
3. She had set up a camera trap that took pictures if anypony was to so much
takes a step onto her property she would have a picture of it.
4. She locked her closet door
Her house was completely Pinkie proof. Her plan was to wait out her birthday in the safety and the comfort of her home.
There was a problem with her plan though. She had to go and feed the chickens eventually. she couldn't do that as long as she was hiding in her cottage.
Fluttershy looked to over at the chickens. The poor dears must be starving.
Fluttershy looked to her camera monitors. Checking to make sure Pinkie was nowhere in sight. She took a deep breath, unlatched all the locks on her door, and ran outside her house to the chicken coop. She threw open through open the doors to the coop began to feed the chickens.
“Hey Fluttershy whacha doing?” said Pinkie Pie. Popping out of the chicken coop.
Fluttershy let out a sigh.
“Fine Pinkie throw your party, I don’t care anymore.”
“A party?” Pinkie Pie giggled “Oh I would never do that to you Fluttershy. I know you hate being the center of attention. And you hate getting startled too. Have a nice and relaxing birthday Fluttershy." pinkie pie pranced away humming to herself as she went.
Fluttershy let herself breath for a second. Crisis averted. Though Fluttershy couldn’t help but feel a little bit sad. Pinkie had thrown her a surprise party every year since they first met. It was depressing to see the tradition end.
Fluttershy walked back past her camera trap and through the front door of her cottage…
"SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY FLUTTERSHY!" Yelled all of Fluttershy’s friends. All of them jumping out from all over Fluttershy’s house.
Fluttershy fell over onto her back in surprise.
“Oh my…you girls startled me.” said Fluttershy, “Pinkie I thought you said you weren’t going to throw me a party this year?”
“Well I’m not Applejack and I didn’t make any Pinkie promise soooo I’m allowed to lie.” said Pinkie with a smile. “Don’t worry though I only invited your friends and animal friends this time. She said as she gestured to her five friends and her animal friends which included harry the bear, Angel bunny, and the rest her animal friends.
“Well I guess that’s ok.” said Fluttershy.
“Alrighty then lets party!” said Pinkie Pie turning the music up.
Despite being the center of attention, Fluttershy had a fun time. Hanging out and being with her friends, even if the attention was sometimes focused on her it wasn’t that bad. They played all her favorite games. Like pin the tail on the pony(Twilight won), truth or dare. (Applejack won) and the quiet game (which Fluttershy won regaining her title as the quiet game champion)
And then, much to Fluttershy’s embarrassment, Pinkie Pie got hold of some of Fluttershy’s old pictures from when she was a filly. 
The picture was of Fluttershy looking around nervously. She was abnormally tall and lanky for a filly which made her like a baby deer.
“Awwww look at you were so cute!” said Pinkie Pie.
“Oh yea I remember when you looked like that.” said Rainbow Dash. That was a long time ago. You were a twig Fluttershy.”
“Yeah she does seem a little slender, how old were you when this picture was taken?” Asked Rarity.
“Um…Six? I think”
“Six! You look like you’re twelve in the picture!”
“I grew early.”
“You sure did I don’t think I’ve seen any pony that tall that young.” said Rarity, “It must have been hard finding dresses with that body size.”
“Yeah, they didn’t make them that length for fillies so sometimes I wore colt suits.
“Really?”
“Yes, that is, until I figured out how to sew my own dresses.”
“Oh that’s how you know so much about sewing.”
“Oh my gosh! It’s almost 4:44 PM! The exact time Fluttershy was born.” Pinkie said looking at the clock. “You have to blow out the candles at the exact right time.” Pinkie brought out a cake that read Happy Birthday Fluttershy lit with 19 candles for every year Fluttershy has been alive.
“Make a wish Fluttershy!” said her friends.
Fluttershy thought about it. She had everything she could ever need right here. Her animals, her friends what more could she want? She looked out her window. A oak tree was standing out there, high and proud. Animals critters had made their home in its branches. She bet it never had to worry about being shy. It never had to talk and yet it had so many friends.
“10 seconds! 8…7…6…”
If there was one thing Fluttershy wanted to be…
5…4…3…2…
It was a tree, but that was something she could never be.
1…0
Fluttershy made a wish and blew out the candles…
And went into a coma.
***
Begin.
Hello little seed
It’s nice to see you again
It’s been 19 years already
Have you been having fun?
I have
Watched you
Grow
From the sky down.
Is your body ready
To change?
No?
Well
To bad
It’s time to go meet your siblings
My Keeper will be there to collect you.
Do you know him?
No?
You should.
He’s watched you grow down.
He will be by to check up on you.
Be alone. My Keeper is shy.
Happy birthday little seed.
~The Misplaced
Fluttershy was looking in the mirror at a younger version of herself. She smiled and the filly Fluttershy smiled back.
And then she started to grow.
Like a sapling. She grew and grew and through and through.
Until she was as tall as Fluttershy. She was not smiling anymore. She wore a sad expression on her face.
But she didn’t stop growing. No no no.
Two times the hight of a stallion than three times. She was a head higher then Celestia herself. Even the frown was gone from her face.
Everything was gone from her face.
She was faceless.
And then she screamed
***
“Perhaps the party was too much for her this time?” said a voice.
Fluttershy began to open her eyes. For some reason her face was covered with something sticky.
“Look she’s awake.”
“Thank Celestia. I thought we were going to have to call a doctor.” said Rarity. “Are you ok?”
“What happened?” asked Fluttershy.
“Well we’re not sure, you were fine, you blew out your candles and then… you faceplanted into the cake.”
Ah that’s what the sticky stuff was Fluttershy wiped the frosting off her face.
“Oh this is all my fault. I knew that you didn’t want a party. But I threw one anyways. Sorry Fluttershy.” said Pinkie Pie “I’ll pack this all up and get out of your hair.” Pinkie Pie began to pack up the party equipment.
Fluttershy remembered how the voice in her dream told her to be alone. Right now. The thought of being alone freighted the shy pony. She felt like if they left now. She would never see them again.
“Wait!” Shouted Fluttershy not wanting them to leave. “We haven’t even had cake or presents yet and those are the best part of a party right Pinkie?"
Pinkie Pie inflated with excitement.
“Of course, opening presents is the fun part of a birthday party, now everypony dig in.”
The cake was delicious (despite having a Fluttershy shaped indent in it) and it was time to open presents.
Rarity’s gift was new outfits for all of Fluttershy’s animal friends. (As if they wore cloths)
Twilight got Fluttershy a book An Egg Heads Guide to Pets. (as if she didn’t already know most of it.)
Applejack got a new country hat. (Probably won’t wear it, but it didn’t look to bad on her.)
Rainbow Dash got Fluttershy a copy of her new book “The Adventures of Technicolor Wonderbolt.” (seemed kinda like an autobiography to Fluttershy.)
Even though most of these gifts were useless to Fluttershy she was still thankful. After all it was the thought that counted the most. However when Fluttershy got to Pinkie’s gift she wasn’t sure what the thought was.
Pinkie Pie was had this peculiar knack of getting everypony a perfect gift, even if they didn’t know they needed yet. Like last year she bought Fluttershy a ladder and a few days latter she used it to get her animals out of the tree when they all got spooked one day.
Wrapped in a zebra colored wrapping paper was the biggest knife Fluttershy had ever seen. She expected some crazy fun thing, not a weapon. It was the size of her fore leg and sharp enough to cut through bone.
.
“Ummm…wow this is a sharp knife.” said Fluttershy admiring her reflection in the metal.
“Do you like it? I call it my lesser knife. I use it to cut cakes and other stuff. I wanted to get you my great knife but Mr. Pyramid is borrowing it.”
“What am I supposed to do this with this?” said Fluttershy letting the words slip out of her mouth.
“Oh I don’t know cut butter, make wood carvings, defend yourself.”
“D-defend myself?” said Fluttershy nervously. “From what?” Pinkie Pie gave her a rare serous look.
“From fear itself.” Pinkie said ominously. Then Pinkie went back to her normal happy self. “Anyhoo happy Birthday Fluttershy!” Pinkie Pie gave Fluttershy a hug and went to hang out with the others.
"Well that’s it for the presents lets go party!” said Pinkie Pie.
And so the six ponies partied into to the night. They had lots of fun and made many memories of the night. However as the end of the party drew near Fluttershy grew increasingly nervous, taking frequent glances out of her window at the edge of the Everfree Forest.
The clock read 9:00
Finally it was time for everypony to go.
"It’s been fun Fluttershy, but its time to head out." said Applejack.
“A-are you sure? Wouldn’t you like to stay one more dance?”
“I would love to sugar cube. But you know what they say; early to bed early to rise.” said Applejack as she walked out into the night.
"I would darling but I have an order of dresses I have to finish by tomorrow I’m behind as it is. So sorry." Rarity walked out into the night.
“I have homework I have to get done. Sorry Fluttershy.” said Twilight. Twilight walked into the night.
“I’ll stay.” said Rainbow Dash picking up on Fluttershy’s nervousness.
“You can’t though, you have cloud duty at three o’clock AM tomorrow.” said Fluttershy who had overheard her friend complaining about it earlier.
“Oh yeah that’s right.” said Rainbow Dash as she walked out the door leaving only Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie left in the house.
“Pinkie Pie how about you? I bet you would love and stay and party some more.” said Fluttershy.
Pinkie Pie looked conflicted. It was as if she wanted to stay with Fluttershy, but something made her hesitant.
“I want to, I really, really do. But…HE is coming.”
“HE?”
“Yeah…”
“Who is he?”
Pinkie Pie looked like she was in pain.
“I can’t say any more, the more you think about him the worse it becomes. Try not to think about him ok?”
“Ok but-“
“If he does come try laughing.” suggested Pinkie Pie.
“D-does that stop him?” Asked Fluttershy.
“No, but it will make you feel better.” Suddenly she changed tones “Bye Fluttershy.”
Pinkie Pie bounced away from
“La la la la…” She prancing away singing as if she had already forgotten the conversation they had just had. The darkness seemed to swallow her pink mass.
This left Fluttershy alone in her house besides her animals, She immediately felt isolation set in. Fluttershy almost never felt alone in her own house, after all who could be alone when she had all of her animal friends to take care of?
But tonight some of her animal friends seemed to be acting strangely. Every time she tried to get near one of them they would slowly move into another room. Every single one of them was afraid to get near her for some reason. Fluttershy found it very, unsettling it was as if she had some sort or contagious disease and just by getting too close to her they could catch it. The only one that didn’t hide when Fluttershy entered the room was Angel Bunny, who stood by her side, giving her a strange look every once in awhile. His head cocked to the side as if confused by something.
Fluttershy shrugged it off and decided to take a look out her window at Everfree forest side. Nopony out there. No why would there be anypony out there? Fluttershy sighed and sat down to read a book.
The clock read: 10:20
Fluttershy’s reading was interrupted by a familiar yet unsettling sound. The sound of all of Fluttershy’s animals moving out of the house.
Like rats from a sinking ship.
Hundreds of animals birds, rats, mice, chipmunks, snakes, everything she could think of.
The only pet that stayed was Angel Bunny who as looking at Fluttershy and then the door more and more frequently.
Fluttershy checked her security cameras for a sign of what was spooking her friends.
There was nothing. Nothing at all.
The Clock read: 11:03
Angel was now visibly shaking. As if she were scared for her life. However he refused to leave Fluttershy.
The clock read: 11:07
Angel Bunny collapsed on the floor as if she was being stabbed by unseen needles. Fluttershy couldn’t stand to see him in pain so Fluttershy made Angel leave the house.
Now Fluttershy was completely alone.
The clock read: 12:00
After making sure every door was locked and the windows were secure, Fluttershy found that she didn’t feel like sleeping. She decided to take a look at an old photo album.
First she looked through the most modern photos. They were mostly of her and her best friends. Her gala pictures, pictures of the royal wedding, that kind of stuff. Then there were pictures of her when she was just a filly.
Her meeting her friends in ponyville. Her and Applejack going Apple bucking. (Applejack did most of the bucking). There was also a few pictures of her and Rainbow Dash from flight camp, oh and there was the picture of her and Pinkie pie. Although pinkie seemed to be focused distracted by something else. Fluttershy tried to see what she was looking at, but every time she tried her eyes would glaze over.
The album ended there. No that couldn’t be right. There where no foal pictures. How strange were they in a different album? No that wasn’t right either…this was her only photo album.
Then two things hit her like a ton of bricks
1. Her parents were nowhere to be seen in them.
2. She couldn’t remember her parents at all.
This is something she shouldn’t have been just noticing now. Why wasn’t this worrying her earlier! It made no sense! why was she just worrying about it now!
Fluttershy took another nervous look out her window at the everyfree forest.
Still nothing but trees were there.
The clock read: 1:30
There’s a colt in the photos.
After staring at them long enough he was there.
IN EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM.
He’s was in the background of almost all the photos and she never even noticed, and its not like he was hard to miss. An unnaturally tall pony in a business suit. His face is always too distorted to make out, but from the looks of it he had none.
But that wasn’t all, in one of the pictures, the one of her and Pinkie when they were just fillies, Fluttershy was covered in blood. Pony carcasses hung from the ceiling and Fluttershy was covered in blood. In this picture the suited pony was upright standing on his hind legs. His forelegs stretched to unrealistic proportions that aren’t seen in nature. branching off like tree branches.
Pinkie’s eyes were locked right on it, but Fluttershy seemed to be oblivious, just smiling away at the camera.
Fluttershy shut the book and peaked her head out the window in the direction of the Everyfree Forest.
The colt was there.
It had been there the whole time.
The clock read: 1:34
Fluttershy flew up the stairs, ran down the hallway into her bedroom, closed the bedroom door, shut her curtains and curled up in a corner facing her window.
“There’s no reason to be scared” She told herself. “I locked all the doors and windows and just in case.” She gripped her new knife tighter.
What the hay is that thing? Why is it following me? Why can’t I remember my parents? These questions seemed irrelevant as a overpowering sense of fear held on to her heart.
She sat there for a half hour not moving never taking her eyes off the window.
The clock read 2:00
A shadow of a tall thin pony crossed Fluttershy’s curtain. A second story window. Too far off the ground for any pony to be head height with. Fluttershy got the feeling that it was looking at her through the curtains. The grip on Fluttershy’s heart tightened. The shadow stayed put for about ten minutes. The only thing separating Fluttershy from the tall pony was a thin sheet of bullet proof glass and a blue curtain. Fluttershy prayed the shadowy figure didn’t know she was here. That he would at any second just walk away and never come back.
The clock read: 2:24
WHY IS IT JUST STANDING THERE! If it wants me it should come get me if not it should go away. Why is it just…standing there! Thought Fluttershy.
That’s then the pony began to move. It raised a claw like appendage toward Fluttershy’s window. Closer and closer until finally Fluttershy heard it make contact with the glass.
Tap tap tap
The colt began to tap on the glass. And then it stopped. And then it started again. And then it stopped and then it started and then it stopped and then started again.
tap tap tap
It was as if it were inviting Fluttershy to come outside.
This continued for about a half hour all the while Fluttershy stared in the corner eyes locked on the window.
She took a peak at the clock: 2:44.
The Pony tapped on the window one last time before stopping. The pony's shadow moved away from the window.
Fluttershy was still for a few minutes listening for any sign of the pony. After hearing none. She worked enough courage to walk over to the window and open the curtains to see if had gone. She would open then on the count of three. One…two…three…
Fluttershy threw open the curtains to find that there was nopony out there. She looked to the left. Only her chicken coop. To the right only the Everfree forest.
Fluttershy let out a sigh of relief. The nightmare was gone.
Knock, knock, knock
Fluttershy’s viens froze.
Knock, knock, knock
The monster was at the front door.
The knocking at the door stop for a moment. As if it was waiting for Fluttershy to come answer it. Too hell with that! She wasn’t about to walk out into the claws of that…thing.
The thing knocked twice more on the front door. And then was silent for about I minute.
She heard a noise. The sound of a pony walking, except it wasn’t outside the house.
It was inside. Inside the locked house.
The sound of the demon’s hoof steps on Fluttershy’s wood floor echoed through the house like the sound of hallow bones on stone.
The creature made its way slowly and deliberately towards Fluttershy’s room. It walked up the stairs, the wood rejecting its very existence with moaning as it climbed up to the second floor.
Fluttershy was shaking out of control. Too paralyzed to move. Fluttershy could see the shadow of the creature from underneath the door. The unlocked door. All the monster had to do was twist the knob and walk in and would have her. It paused by the door. For about a half hour it stood there as if waiting for something. It began to very softy to tap on the unlocked door. God damn tapping never stopped. Mocking Fluttershy with her helplessness.
Tap tap tap
For what seemed like hours the demon taped on the door as if it expected Fluttershy to come let it inside. Fluttershy sat unmoving pressed against the wall just wishing it would go away. What had she done to deserve this? What did the monster want from her.
Then the tapping stopped for about five seconds.
And then there was a
BANGBANG BANGBANG
which caused Fluttershy to jump in surprise. Then there was another BANG on the door so loud that shook Fluttershy’s floorboards and then again and again and again the demon BANGED violently against the door. The door it’s self bucked with each bang.
Fluttershy couldn’t take it anymore. She wanted it to end. She didn’t care if she had to kill herself she couldn’t take this anxiety. She had to do something so she built up her breath and yelled as loud as she could.
“WHAT! DO! YOU! WANT!” Screamed Fluttershy
The banging stopped.
“IF YOU WANT TO KILL ME YOU SHOULD JUST BUCKING KILL ME AND GET IT OVER WITH! NONE OF THIS FREAKING ME OUT AND TAPPING AND SNEAKING! IF YOU WANT ME COME GET ME! THE DOOR IS UNLOCKED! SO COME IN AND KILL ME! KILL ME OR LEAVE ME ALONE!”
There was silence from the other side of the door. Then very slowly the shadow of the demon slowly moved away from the door. She heard it walk very slowly down the stairs, through the living room and then she heard it no more.
She walked to her window and looked out at the every free forest. The creature walked up to the second story window and stared at Fluttershy. It was ghostly white, eyeless and mouthless yet it was staring at her.
Fluttershy stared right back. Her face inches away from his. Fluttershy thought that it was impossible to be more frightened then she had been. But she was wrong. She was looking into the face of fear it's self.
My stare is stronger then your's little seed. said a cold voice in her head.
The colt gave her a mouthless smile as if amused by her and then walked away. Past the chicken coop into the darkness of the Everfree forest where it was impossible to distinguish him from the trees around him.
Fluttershy continued to stare off into the darkness for a minute before she unfroze. That was one of the most freighting things that had ever happened to her. She looked at the clock on her desk. It read 4:45. It was nearly morning already. There was no point in sleeping yet. Fluttershy carefully decided to looked down stairs. She carefully crept down the stairs. Listening for any sound indicating danger.
And then she saw it.
A doll. A abnormally tall and slender pony doll. It was in exact likeness to the pony that she has seen out of her window except for the fact it had buttons for eyes and it wasn't wearing a business suit. Fluttershy moved up to it. There was a note underneath it. In big scratchy letters it read.
Happy birThdAy little seED. i hope you enjoy your present. we will be back soon to pick you up.
-The Loved
Fluttershy read the message. She had no idea what to make of it.
All she could to was stare out into the empty everfree forest and wait for daylight.
*****
In the deepest part of the Everfree forest under an ancient tree, a slender pony and a freak were talking. Not out loud but in their heads.
“Where is she. I thought you went to get her?” said the Freak
"Not ready yet." said the slender pony brushing it off
“Not ready yet? but it was her 19th birthday right? She should be sprouted by now.” said The Freak.
"Not ready." Repeated the slender pony.
“But if she stays there the hunters will be on her tail faster then bugs on an apple.”
Silence
"You know you can’t leave her there. She’s going to start changing. She will start to hunt. She could hurt even kill her friends."
"Not ready." the slender pony repeated
The Freak sighed .
“Tisk, tisk your kind doesn’t care much for your family do you. Your just going to let her suffer?”
The slender pony tilted its head. Oak trees don’t take care of their saplings. Saplings suffocate each other to get to the light. There is only room for so many saplings...
“I see. So you’re going to let the stronger ones live and let the rest kill each other? But if that’s the case why not bring her here? Let her fight it out with the rest of the saplings.”
The two were silent for a second.
"Not ready yet."
The freak sighed in frustration.
“Whatever there your siblings do whatever you want.”
The two sat in silence underneath the ancient tree.
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i liked and fav the story
1921353 thank you!
chan.catiewayne.com/z/src/130831979143.jpg
I like. Faved! It has a very interesting take on the slendermane story idea.
1921356 welcome
1921817 oops your right. i'll fix that.
Oh goody. another one...
1921843 don't fret this one is not based on slender, it's Tribe Twelve. And things are going to be different. Slendy himself is not going to play a major role.
The picture of fluttershy is going to give me nightmares I just know it!
Wow. May have been terrible grammar, but the suspense and creepy, hair raising images plastered in my brain cover it up.
Really good job, now if you'll excuse me, I have to go lock all my doors now.
1922299
it won't help you know. Doors never work.
Yeah I should have edited more before posting, but I can't seem to find a editor.
1922316
Fine, I'll go retrieve my exploding rooster and splatter his guts against the wall when he gets towards me.
Yeah, the only trouble was grammar. Your emotional depth and plot was really good.
should i be scared of slendy, fluttershy
, or both.
Slendershy now that sounds scarier than Slendermen
Haha, ha.. uh, yeah...
I already beat the original Slender game, but Slendershy might be a different story...
Anyways, you have a nice storyline and emotional depth going on. Work a bit on your grammar and you'll be fine! (Maybe not from Slender, but oh well).
1926413
1922349
I'm trying to locate some of the grammar mistakes but i'm having trouble,
a little help?
1922103
did you end up having nightmares?
1924799
The tree at the end is the scariest. but out of the two I think Slender Mane is more scary then Slendershy.
1926600
I hoped I didn't get nightmares and I didn't!
so my night was ok.
1926600
Well, some of the times, you don't start out with capitalization, and you forgot to put some commas where some of the dialogue ended.
Also, you capitalized the first letter after the dialogue. Unless you're ending the the dialogue with a period to start a new sentence, that's a big no no.
1926600 What Gear Grinder said. I'll skim over it later to look for specific, notable mistakes.
1927369
1928703
Oh iIsee it now. this line
The capitalized letters letters are HTAED, but wait a second what happens when I reverse them, DEATH :rarity wink: see what I did there.
That was awesome!! And was that a Pyramid Pie reference I saw
... Anyway, I still can't believe I didn't see this 3 bloody days ago. And this is very well written. I could feel Fluttershy's fear
last thing before I fly, I can't believe no one saw the hidden message in Fluttershy's birthday note. But oh well. Keep up the awesome 
Dang that is creepy, but there are some things that should be addressed.
I'm not scared, on an unrelated note, I will be sleeping in a high security bunker tonight.
Also, what is the secret hidden in her birthday message?
W-w-why did you h-h-have to write this.
Slender: the one thing that scares me.
.
I feel restless.
I wish Slenderman gave you stuffed toys.
I like it to but I'm slitelly terrorfide
i cant sleep Im so scared i hate you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
im younger than you think
3786086 what grade are you fifth?
Happy birThdAy little seED
Hmmm.
The Day?
TAED? Deat? Date?
Hi... Awesome story so far though you just gave nightmares to a 13 year old girl (NOT me, my friend. You just made me laugh cause' I liked it, especially seeing my friends reaction.)
You have some grammar errors if though it's fine because I still liked your story. At fist I was a bit skeptical but I was right to read this story. You really outdid yourself with this story (even if it is a tad bit creepy) and keep writing things like this your stories will be top of the list. I had fun reading this story!
3819802 Bit narcissistic, isn't it, commenting on a story about you?
"Happy birThdAy little seED" ... It says DEATH backwards... That's creepy XD really subtly creepy
4650850 I just noticed when I looked at your comment
Good chapter just one thing... a colt is a young male pony and a stallion is an adult male pony, GET IT RIGHT!!!
sorry that just bothers me to no end.
Muhahahahahahahah!!!!!
Must read all of the dark fic's