Chapter 2: Opening Salvo
“It takes a lot to make us go to war. We suffered under Discord for a thousand years without resorting to arms. Ponies were literally starving in the streets before the First Rune War started. We’re not predators—we don’t have that natural instinct for aggression, like the changelings or the gryphons. So if we’re going to war, you can rest assured that we’re doing so for good reasons, reasons that we can’t just talk out over a cup of tea.”
- Manehattan Minister of Peace, Hoofington Economics Conference
“KHORAIC VORTEX IN THE MAIN CHAMBER!”
The cry was just the first in a storm of screams and panic it sent off through the scientists in the facility. Twilight Sparkle watched, dumbfounded, as a vortex of deadly energy manifested itself in the center of the chamber, right next to her device. The sounds of panic were soon drowned out by the rumbling of thunder and groans of priceless machinery being smashed to pieces as shards of concrete and metal flew through the air.
“Shut it down, Twilight!” screamed a stallion next to her, hiding behind a console. “Shut it down!”
“No!” Twilight shouted, her eyes not on the swirling vortex but on the spirals of iridescent energy coalescing at the center of the golden egg. “It’s working! I can see it! It’s working!”
“Damn it, Twilight, you’re going to kill us all!” The frightened stallion reached for a lever on the console.
“YOU TOUCH THAT LEVER AND I WILL BURY YOU IN TARTARUS!” Twilight screamed, chest heaving as she violently slapped his hoof away.
The stallion leaned back against the floor, eyes wide. “You’re crazy!”
“I know what I’m do-” Twilight was interrupted as the Khoraic Vortex reached its apex and imploded in on itself, releasing a final burst of light that filled her eyes with stars and sent her body flailing backwards onto the floor.
Before her eyesight had even recovered she was galloping down the staircase as fast as her legs could carry her, only to stumble on the last stair, body violently wrenching forward as her face smacked into the floor. As she got up again she noticed her vision was shattered; it took a moment for her to realize that her glasses had been broken by the impact. She knocked them onto the floor, where they clattered several feet before stopping, then took another step forward and tripped on something warm and soft.
Seriously annoyed now, Twilight got back up and turned to see whatever it was that she had tripped on and saw... herself.
The other... her moaned weakly, and slowly raised her head into the air. Groggily her eyes scanned the room until they came to rest upon Twilight, at which point they snapped wide open.
Twilight stared into her own shining, glassy eyes. She opened her mouth to speak, but when she tried, her voice wasn’t there. It took a few moments to find her voice again. “Wh... wh- who are you?”
In her peripheral vision Twilight could see heads poking out from behind consoles, ponies cautiously treading down the staircase, all eyes on the two Twilights.
The other her opened her mouth. “You’re... me!”
Twilight’s eyebrows furrowed in anger. “No, you are me!” she growled, jabbing an accusing hoof into the other pony’s chest. There was only one thing in all of Equestria she knew of that could produce another pony that looked exactly like her, and she’d be damned if she let this thing put itself on equal standing as herself.
“Director!” An excited shout drew Twilight’s attention away from the other Twilight towards the Harmony Device. A researcher had climbed onto the center of the golden egg. Bathed in a sphere of white light, he held up in his hooves a large golden tiara, beautiful and ornate in design, trimmed with spirals of gold and embedded with round blue gems, crowned with an enormous star-shaped magenta gemstone that sparkled brilliantly with the reflected light of the Harmony Device. “It worked! It worked!”
The other Twilight’s jaw dropped. “That’s the Element of Magic! How did you-”
Whatever the remainder of her question was, it was drowned out by the sudden screaming of a siren: a single long, continuous tone, rising and falling in pitch, howling down from the roof of the chamber.
Of all the dozens of ponies gathered in the room, Shining Armor was the only one that didn’t miss a beat. “That’s an invasion siren!” he shouted from the top of the stairs.
A flurry of panic spread through the chamber like wildfire. Scientists and technicians ran screaming and yelling in every direction, while security guards tried to wrestle the confused stampede back under control.
Twilight Sparkle stared at the other, fake her. This can’t be a coincidence, she thought to herself. A shimmering purple aura surrounded her horn as Twilight picked up her glasses and her imposter. Keeping the other Twilight hovering in the air, she put her glasses back on her head, flipped up onto her forehead so as to stay out of her vision.
Pushing through the crowd, Shining Armor tried to get down to his sister. “I have to get back to Canterlot!” he shouted. “If Solarium is under attack then they might be there as well!”
Twilight craned her neck to try and see her brother through the herd of ponies, but she wasn’t tall enough to see over their heads as they scrambled for the emergency shelter. After a few seconds she gave up. “Meet me at the teleportation array!” she shouted. Floating the other Twilight over to her, she wrapped a hoof around the other pony’s neck and channeled magic through her horn.
There was a flash of light. When it faded, Twilight was standing on an empty platform in front of the teleportation array. She dumped the other Twilight onto the floor and examined the console. Buttons and dials and levers lined every row, and although Twilight was not experienced in operating a teleportation engine, the Solarium penchant for user-friendliness meant that it was not difficult to understand. By the time Shining Armor shoved his way through to the teleportation array the rune engine beneath was whirring online.
“What’s... going on?” Other Twilight asked, sitting on the ground in a daze, staring at the herd of evacuating ponies. As Shining Armor passed her by he cast a look towards her of primarily disgust, mixed with confusion and curiosity. But, showing his military bearing, he kept his focus, and stepped inside the teleportation chamber.
Twilight pulled a red lever labeled “Canterlot - Main Hub.” The whirring of the teleportation engine rose to a crescendo, but then descended back to its standby pitch and volume. Twilight shook her head. “No receiver.” She glanced up at her brother standing inside the wire cage, his expression stoic and unreadable. The fact that the central Canterlot teleportation hub was down could only mean one thing. “What’s the closest array to the Royal Guard Headquarters?”
Shining Armor’s brows drew together for a few seconds, then answered, “Skyswirl Plaza.”
It took a few moments for Twilight to find the label within the array of levers. Once again the teleportation engine’s whirring rose higher and higher. There was a flash of cyan light, and Shining Armor was gone.
“Come on!” Twilight shouted to her imposter, magically dragging her behind herself as she vaulted over the railing. By now the chamber was empty, the researchers having all evacuated into the emergency shelter already. Twilight raced down the corridors to do the same.
The shelter was a large collection of underground bunker-rooms, connected by tunnels and hallways, built to house engineers working on the Solar Engine should Solarium ever come under attack. It had been intended to be able to be used as a backup shelter for government officials as well due to the close proximity of the Engine with Solarium’s administrative sector, so there was plenty of excess space within the shelter. As Twilight ran through the hallways, most of the rooms she passed by were only half-filled or had one or two ponies. But she was looking for one that was entirely unoccupied, so she pressed on.
A security guard emerged from around the next corner, forcing Twilight to suddenly skid to a stop. The burly pegasus was dressed in full battle gear, the sharpened steel running along the front edge of his wings sparkling in the light of the electric arc lamps. He glanced at Twilight, then at the other Twilight being dragged on her back along the ground behind her.
“I’ll take the changeling if you don’t mind, Director.”
“Wh- I’m not a-” Other Twilight started to yelp, but was silenced by a swift kick from Twilight.
“I do mind,” Twilight contended. “Its appearance in this facility is not a coincidence. It has something to do with my project, my machine, and I intend to find out what.” She looked fixedly up into the eyes of the guard pony, standing steadfast, refusing to give up one inch of space.
The guard pegasus took a deep breath and rolled his eyes up towards the ceiling, perhaps understanding the futility of attempting to argue with Director Sparkle. A few moments later his gaze fell back down to the unicorn. “Well, perhaps I could accompany you and keep you safe.”
“I’m sorry, but I can take care of myself,” Twilight replied. The irony of that statement was not lost on the security guard, who looked closely at the other Twilight as he shifted out of the way.
Twilight walked past him, still dragging the other Twilight behind her. “Thank you, sir,” she said in passing. The very next room over was empty, the only furniture a single wooden desk and stool. She entered and shut the door behind her, locking it with a half-turn of the metal wheel mounted on the back.
With contempt Twilight threw her prisoner against the wall and tilted her head down, pointing her horn straight at the other pony’s face. “Alright, you changeling scum,” she spat, every word burning with scorn, “I don’t know who you are or how you got here, but I know this is not an accident. That was a Khoraic Vortex you arrived in, and those are only supposed to happen in extremely rare cases where a teleportation engine overloads. I want to know how you ended up in a time-space distortion that my machine generated!”
“I don’t know!” the other Twilight cried. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, I have no idea where I am, I have no idea what’s going on—and I’m not a changeling, for pony’s sake!”
Twilight lifted her head and stared down at the other pony, eyes narrow. They were both breathing heavily, their chests heaving at exactly the same rate. The other Twilight was scared; her hooves were curled up against her body, her eyes quivering. Even as Twilight glared down at her she turned her head slightly to the side, as though trying to hide from that penetrating gaze.
Twilight wasn’t convinced, not by a long shot, but the other mare seemed sincere. How best then, to ascertain the truth?
“Prove it.”
“How?”
“Do magic. Do a spell. Any spell.”
The other pony’s head twitched back and forth, her eyes flittering across the room.
“Hurry up!” Twilight snapped.
The other Twilight froze still for a moment, as though too scared to move. Then, slowly, her eyes closed, and her head drew down closer to her body. Her horn glimmered, then became enwrapped in a purple aura.
Twilight felt her glasses detach from her head and float into the air. Before her eyes, the delicate metal frames straightened, the cracks in the glass disappeared, and the delicate gears that controlled the mechanisms which switched lenses back and forth at will reassembled themselves.
That aura. That light purple-magenta-ish aura. It was the same exact color as her own familiar aura.
No two unicorns were supposed to have exactly the same color of magical aura. The fact that this other pony’s magic was indistinguishable from hers could only mean one thing.
“... Discord’s black bones...”
Against her will Twilight’s body fell backwards, her rump hitting the floor. Her mouth didn’t seem to want to close no matter how hard she tried. All her anger, her frustration suddenly evaporated, and instead her body just felt numb.
“How...” Her voice seemed like that of a newborn kitten. “How is this... you... you can’t be... it’s not... you’re not...”
The other Twilight picked herself up off the ground and dusted herself off. “I don’t know about you, but something like this has-”
And then the lights suddenly went out.
The sudden fall of complete darkness jolted Twilight’s body back into action. Energy surged through her horn, shining from the tip as a soft orb of light, tinging the room a deep shade of purple.
Thumping noises echoed from the outside the door. There was muffled shouting, and then, a scream.
“We’re not safe here,” Twilight said, her expression grim.
“What do you mean?” Other Twilight asked, confused.
Twilight grimaced. That voice. It resembled the voice she remembered from recordings of herself, but it was more organic, more alive. And yet it sounded wrong; it was too high-pitched, too young. It didn’t sound like the voice Twilight was used to hearing when she spoke.
She shook her head, pushing those thoughts out from her mind. Now was not the time. Twilight turned to the other unicorn. “This was a top-secret government project,” she explained. “They coordinated this attack with the activation of the Harmony Device. That means they knew it would temporarily disable the outer defenses by drawing power from them, and that means they must have had a spy on the project. Every pony that knew about this project that’s not a head of state was in that room when we turned that thing on, so that means that they have a spy, right here, in the shelter, that can open up the doors and let them in.”
As if right on cue there was a series of loud, irregular knocks on the door. The lock handle trembled and shook for a while, then fell silent. A bright golden line started shining through the crack in the door, accompanied by the shrieking sound of metal being cut apart.
Twilight turned to Other Twilight, her voice a low whisper. “Look, I still don’t know who you are or where you came from, but I don’t have any choice but to trust you right now. When I say ‘Go’, you open that door, alright?” Other Twilight nodded, and Twilight took position right across from the door, her head lowered and hooves spread apart. “GO!”
The wheel spun and the door swung open, much to the surprise of the would-be infiltrator on the other side. Twilight let loose with a massive burst of magical energy that blasted the armored unicorn off his hooves and flattened him against the concrete wall.
“Come on!” Twilight shouted to the other her, and took off down the hallway, firing beams from her horn as she ran that smashed into more of the Manehattanite soldiers that filled the hallway. Surprise meant that three of distinctively-armored ponies fell before the fourth and fifth started responding in kind, but Twilight summoned a purple shield and rammed it into the final two.
And then she rounded the corner and found herself in a room full of a dozen more soldiers.
As Twilight skidded to a stop and desperately tried to reverse her momentum, the soldiers in the room opened fire. Her shield vibrated as it absorbed magical energy beams and deflected throwing knives. Two pegasi took off and raced towards her.
Twilight dropped the shield, and ran.
The other Twilight was running down the hall towards her. “Not this way, not this way!” Twilight shouted, and the other her slid to a halt and turned around. Together, the two of them ran back down the hallway.
“Which way?” Other Twilight shouted as they came to the end of the hallway.
“Left!” Twilight answered. As the two of them galloped down the new hallway Twilight glanced back over her shoulder. To her astonishment the two pegasi were handling the tight corridors with ease; she watched as, one after the other, the pegasi hit the side of the hallway hooves-first, legs compressing like springs, then kicking off.
They’re going to catch us, Twilight realized. And although fighting two pegasi was well within her capabilities, it would give the other soldiers time to catch up. She had two, maybe three seconds to think of a solution.
Smoothly, Twilight flipped herself around and slid backwards to a stop. She closed her eyes and telekinetic energy surged from her horn, wrapping itself around one of the heavy metal doors that lined the hallways. There was a horrendous metallic screeching noise as the door was ripped off its hinges, and Twilight threw her improvised weapon down the hallway as hard as she could.
The expressions on the pegasi’s faces were priceless as the giant slab of metal hurtled towards them.
Twilight turned back around and started running, the sounds of crashing metal echoing behind her.
“Left,” Twilight ordered again as they reached the end of another hallway, but shouts and screaming drifted down from where she had intended to go. “Er, never mind. Other way, come on!” The two unicorns raced through the maze of hallways as Twilight tried to find a path out of the deathtrap that the emergency shelter had become. There’s only one direct route from the shelter to the surface, and that’s the one they used to get in, she realized.
They had no other choice. Twilight led the other her back into the main chamber. As she cautiously peeked out from behind the door, she saw a group of over two dozen ponies down at the bottom, taking apart the Harmony Device. Rage seethed in her at the sight of the Manehattanites messing with her machine, and that rage exploded into outright mania when she saw them carrying away the Element.
“GRAAAGH!” Her battle cry echoed throughout the cavernous chamber as she charged down the steps. Bits of concrete and delicate machinery whipped around her as though caught in a tornado while consoles arced through the air like artillery shells. The storm of steel and stone thundered its way across the chamber like a horde of angry ghosts, tearing through anything that crossed its path.
Mayhem erupted at the bottom of the chamber. The first barrage of improvised artillery smashed straight into the center of the Manehattanite formation, crushing several pegasi. The soldiers scattered, the Earth ponies ducking for cover, the pegasi taking to the air, the unicorns attempting to shield themselves from the telekinetic salvo. The Manehattanites, unable to see their attacker through the whirlwind of scrap tearing towards them, panicked. Jagged pieces of steel tore through skin and flesh, speckling the floor with red splotches.
It was not long before Twilight’s opponents recovered, however. As she continued down the stairs, drawing closer and closer, they soon realized that they had but only a single attacker. The very same pieces of scrap Twilight had been throwing began shooting back at her; she quickly threw up a shield and continued her assault. But such massively unrestrained use of magical power was taking its toll—she was slowing, tiring. The glassy plinks of debris pinging off her shield soon became a constant rhythm; it took all of her mental fortitude to maintain it as she tore another machine off the ground and threw it. The direction of the majority of the flying debris soon reversed. Cracks began to splinter across the surface of her magical bubble, but Twilight pressed on, teeth clamped tight, eyes burning with determination.
There was a sound like the shattering of glass as a throwing knife penetrated the bubble, and pain sliced across her left shoulder. A cry escaped her lips as she gazed down at her injured limb; there was a fleshy gash just beneath the joint, shining bright red as blood gushed out and leaked down her leg.
Her shield trembled under one last barrage, and then fell apart. Twilight closed her eyes, awaiting the end amidst the hurricane of metal and noise.
When seconds passed and she found herself inexplicably still alive, she opened them again. A powerful purple force shield was absorbing every energy beam and deflecting every metal projectile. But it wasn’t hers.
A pair of hooves wrapped themselves around her body, hoisting her into the air. “Come on, let’s get out of here!” the other Twilight shouted, lifting the injured unicorn up the stairs.
“No!” Twilight screamed, fighting desperately against the hooves trying to drag her back to safety. “I’ve got to stop them, they’re taking the Element, they’re taking everything, I have to stop them!”
“You’ll die.”
Those two words. Those two, simple, short syllables, and all of Twilight’s fight simply vanished: evaporated into thin air. Her legs lay limp; her eyes stared uselessly at the rain of metal shards and energy beams that rained upon the magical shield. Her body was a ragdoll to her, unable to move, unwilling to respond to her commands.
Magic enveloped her, and she felt herself lift into the air. Some deep, animalistic part of triggered, and she instinctively curled up. Exhaustion lay on her like a heavy blanket, and darkness took her.
----------
It took all of Shining Armor’s resolve and dedication to his duty to tear himself away from Twilight. His instincts commanded him not to do it, to stay in Solarium and protect his little sister to the death. But a lifetime of living in Canterlot and years of fighting for his hometown had instilled in him an equally deep sense of loyalty to the city, and in his rational mind Shining Armor knew that Twilight would be well-protected in the heart of Solarium.
So he ignored his familial instincts, and left.
The acrid scent of smoke filled his nostrils as Shining Armor stepped out of the teleportation array into Skyswirl Plaza. Fires burned in the distance as plumes of smoke billowed out over the shining fortress-city, weaving between the white towers like black threads as they expanded into the skies. His ears, honed beyond the limits of an ordinary pony by years of training and combat experience, detected the sounds of war: blades swinging, magic blasting, ponies screaming.
And there were things, things in the sky. Big triangular metal things that dodged and weaved through the towers of Canterlot, dwarfing the pegasi darting around them. They were ungainly machines, in both their appearance and movement: blocky and crude in design, and easily outpaced by their pegasus escorts. As Shining Armor watched, one of the machines approached the plaza and came to a standstill, hovering in the air for a little time before descending to the ground.
Shining Armor ducked into one of the many stores surrounding the plaza and hid. Carefully peeking through a row of books in the store window, he watched the triangular flying machine deploy three stick-like legs and come to a rest on the white marble of the plaza. A ramp dropped from its belly, and a dozen soldiers, dressed in the distinctive dark green battle gear of Manehattan, marched out. Once they had exited the flying machine returned to the air and flew off.
Shining Armor considered his situation. He was unarmed and unarmored. To get to his gear, he had to get to the Tower of the Guard—visible from his window, just two blocks away. He could either break the rear window of the store and take the long way around, or he could go out through the front door. Out in the plaza were four unicorns and eight pegasi, most likely a single squad, plus two pegasi escorts. The squad that had come out of the flying machine were basic grunts, probably fresh out of boot camp without so much as a cat-fight’s worth of fighting experience, save for the sergeant in charge. The pegasi escorts, on the other hoof, had their dark green armor trimmed in gold—the mark of the Manehattan elite corps, the Rangers. Shining Armor himself had nothing but his own body, not even the non-combat uniform that marked him as a member of the Royal Guard.
But he was a unicorn, so he didn’t need armor or weapons. And more than that, he was a Commando.
Shining Armor ran out the front door of the bookstore screaming and flailing, doing his best impression of a panicking civilian. As his head swung wildly back and forth he picked one of the Rangers and started galloping towards her. The Manehannites looked at him with vague, detached curiosity, at least until they noticed he was getting uncomfortably close.
At about four meters away was when the pegasus Ranger realized it, but by then it was already too late. Shining Armor leapt the gap in a single bound, delivering a powerful kick through his enemy’s hooves, barely raised to defend herself, sending all his momentum smashing into the pony’s unarmored belly and knocking her to the ground. Before she could even react to the attack Shining Armor had brought his hoof to her throat, and pressed down with the full weight of his body.
Crunch.
The mare was almost certainly dead, but Shining Armor took no chances; telekinetically he ripped off the blades lining one of her wings and sliced it across her throat.
At this point the grunt squad was still in shock; the only Manehattanite to respond was the other Ranger, who had already bridged half the distance between him and Shining Armor. Shining Armor did a spinning leap towards the pegasus; simultaneously he summoned magic into his horn and pushed down hard on the other pony’s head, forcing the Ranger to stumble and fall to the ground. As Shining Armor spun above the pegasus he took his stolen wing-blade and shoved it downwards, aiming for a vulnerable gap in the back of the Ranger’s armor at the bottom of the neck. But the pegasus, anticipating the attack, twisted his body, causing the blade to deflect harmlessly against his armor.
Shining Armor overshot the Ranger and hit the ground rolling, smashing into the grunt squad like a bowling ball. With practiced ease he came out of his roll in a perfect combat stance. Surrounded by enemies on all sides, he summoned a purplish-pink bubble shield into existence, locking him in with the two closest pegasi, standing on opposite sides of him.
The one on his left recovered more quickly than the other, and attempted to thrust his spear at him. Shining Armor dodged backwards, letting the spear pass in front of him, but before the pegasus’s momentum had been fully expended he telekinetically forced the spear forwards, ripping it out of the other pony’s hooves. A slight adjustment to the path was all that was needed to send it plunging through the flimsy chest armor of the pegasus’s compatriot, who was only now finally beginning to react to the situation. Shining Armor turned around and delivered a powerful kick with his hind legs to the first pegasus’s head, then pulled out the spear from the other pony’s chest and delivered the finishing blow.
By now the element of surprise had worn off. As the Ranger barked orders at them, the unicorns were taking up positions at the edge of the plaza in teams of two while the pegasi started smashing against Shining Armor’s shield. He had caught himself like a mouse in a trap of his own design.
But mousetraps didn’t tend to explode.
Grabbing the other, unbloodied spear, Shining Armor made a flicking motion with his head. The sharp, distinct edge of his shield suddenly diffused into a cloud that blasted outwards in all direction, blowing the pegasi off their feet. Knowing that the other Ranger was still the most dangerous enemy present, he hefted the spear and threw it, giving it the telekinetic guidance it needed to plunge straight into the pony’s exposed face.
Four down.
The unicorns at the edge of the plaza opened fire, shooting bright multi-colored beams of energy at him. Rather than summon another magical bubble to defend himself, Shining Armor telekinetically lifted two of the still-stunned pegasi and used them as living shields as he charged towards two of the unicorns. One ran; the other tried to magically wrestle the pegasi from Shining Armor, but her magic was far too weak. Again Shining Armor tore a wing-blade from one of the pegasi and sliced it across the unicorn’s chest
Seven down.
The other two unicorns took one look at their squadmate that was running for dear life away from Shining Armor, then turned tail and scampered off. The two remaining pegasi watched their fleeing squad members, exchanged glances, and took to the sky.
And that's a wrap.
Panting hard and drenched in sweat, Shining Armor managed a small grin as his opponents fled. But that was all he allowed himself; time was of the essence, and he ran off towards the Tower of the Guard.
The great double-doors of the tower entrance had been left open; Shining Armor ran right through and up the staircase, passing by paintings and statues of former Guard Captains as he approached the top. Golden weapons and armors lined the halls of the Tower, relics of bygone eras. There wasn’t really anything “royal” about the Royal Guard—there hadn’t been for centuries. The days when princesses still roamed the streets of Canterlot were little more than legend now. But the name of the Guard remained the same, despite those they had been intended to guard being long gone; it was a memorial to those old days of peace and harmony and perhaps, the mark of a silent promise that they might return.
Such thoughts, however, were far from Shining Armor’s mind as he entered the royal armory. The shelves were mostly empty, save for a single locker at the other end of the room marked with the prestigious title, “Captain of the Guard.”
With motion so oft-repeated that it had become reflex, Shining Armor donned his battle gear. Silvery plate armor, enchanted to be as light as possible, fitted over his chest and back, while a thin layer of padded chainmail wrapped around the upper half of his limbs and his underside. A belt holding a series of razor-sharp throwing knives wrapped around his waist. His hooves fitted snugly into metal shoes; the front pair were equipped with rotating blades that could swing out and lock into place for combat, then swing back when Shining Armor needed his legs for running.
A loud metallic crash sounded as Shining Armor finished putting on his shoes. As he rushed out of the armory he almost ran into a small yellow stallion.
“C- Captain!” the yellow unicorn exclaimed, dropping papers all over the ground. “I- uh- er- I- uh- S- sorry, I didn’t realize-”
“Save the apology for later, Bright Hoof,” Shining Armor ordered. “Where is the Lord Magister?”
Bright Hoof desperately tried to gather up his papers with his hooves, mumbling something incoherently. Shining Armor mentally sighed; the little yellow stallion was a secretary, not a soldier, and it showed. Any of the Royal Guards would have answered immediately, probably by telling Shining Armor that they were escorting the ruler of Canterlot to one of the three maximum-security vaults scattered throughout Canterlot. “Forget the papers and just answer me, please.”
Bright Hoof continued mumbling as he finished picking up the papers in his hooves and looked up into Shining Armor’s eyes. “They, um. Took him to Max-Secure Bunker D.” His eyes shifted back and forth nervously.
“Thank you,” Shining Armor replied, and ran back down the stairs.
There was a small melee on the rooftops of the buildings across the street as Shining Armor left the Tower. Two Canterlot Earth ponies were dueling a pegasus while another Manehattanite unicorn provided ranged support. Unable to help directly, Shining Armor took one of the knives from his belt and, after judging angle and wind speed for a few seconds, magically fired it with deadly precision straight into the neck of the enemy unicorn. The unicorn’s cry as she fell off the rooftop distracted her pegasus companion for a second, just long enough a time for the Earth ponies to exploit and finish the pegasus.
One of the Earth ponies waved her thanks from the rooftop before the pair ran out of view. Shining Armor nodded before turning and scanning the deserted streets. Most civilians had already taken shelter in bunkers or buildings. In this situation, he was essentially blind; with no way to contact anyone in charge and no idea of what the overall plan of defense was, he was effectively on his own despite being in the middle of his hometown.
So he paused, and thought. The Manehattanite flying machines in the sky were numerous, but at one squad per craft they weren’t nearly enough to successfully invade Canterlot. There were no sounds of artillery in the distance, which meant that either there was no land assault accompanying the aerial one or that Canterlot’s defense turrets had already all been taking out, which was unlikely. The shield engines weren’t activated, which meant that whoever was in charge did not believe that there were more enemy forces incoming and had left the giant overlapping cyan bubbles offline in order to better facilitate mobility within the city.
It didn’t make any sense. Unless Manehattan was holding back the majority of its forces for some unknown signal, there was no way they could be seeking to occupy Canterlot. The flight of their machines and pegasi across the sky and the distribution of fighting across the city, indicated by the plumes of smoke that billowed from the white towers, seemed random and chaotic. The Manehattanites were wreaking havoc, but they didn’t seem to be going for any particular objective as Shining Armor would expect a relatively small strike force to be doing.
For some strange reason, his mind wandered back to the Tower of Guard. The scene played out in his mind again: him leaving the armory, Bright Hoof bumping into him and scattering papers all over the floor, Shining Armor trying to question Bright Hoof as Bright Hoof desperately tried to pick the papers back up with his hooves...
Wait. Bright Hoof was a unicorn. What was he doing picking up papers with his hooves? And what was on those papers anyways? Shining Armor closed his eyes, straining to remember.
Diagrams. Maps of the city. Information about the security shelters.
“They, um. Took him to Max-Secure Bunker D.”
There were only three of those in the city.
Shining Armor cursed himself for not realizing it sooner. Bright Hoof hadn’t been Bright Hoof; that was a changeling. And if that changeling had been looking for information about the maximum-security vaults...
Everything else is a distraction, he thought. They’re after the Lord Magister.
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Canterlot Military Propaganda Pamphlet (Excerpt)
The Canterlot Commando Initiative
In a world where war is dominated by images of massive telekinesis engine-powered cannons battering enormous city-spanning shields that can be activated at a moment’s notice, wars are still nevertheless won and lost on the backs of the soldiers who fight it. And there is no city that recognizes this fact more than Canterlot, as demonstrated by the Commando Initiative.
With a ninety-eight percent dropout rate even after selecting from the highest scorers in all branches of service, there is no training regime in Equestria that is more brutal than the Canterlot Commandos. There are rarely more than a dozen active-duty Commandos at any given time, and these gifted few wear their badges with pride. As they should, for these are unquestionably the best soldiers in Equestria. Trained to operate deep in enemy territory alone for long periods of time on the most dangerous and most critical covert operations, commandos are expected to handle jobs that would normally be relegated to entire platoons, and can easily best entire squads of enemy soldiers even when heavily outnumbered.
Commandos are tools of last resort. When a mission absolutely cannot be allowed to fail, they are who we call.
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Facinating story, I guess normal Twilight is in for one rude information dump by her cross-demensional doppelganger
So right now we have Other Twilight designated for the Twilight we all know and love, but that will still get confusing if you switch between their perspectives. Other than that, great chapter
Or?
Sorry couldn't help noticing.
Very good job. Hope to see more soon, possibly more cross-dimensional mane 6?
1933437
Thanks for catching that.
Ghostbusters!
No... wait...
The A-Team! da da dadaaaaa da da daaaaaaaaaaa...
Keeping up the work here - Twi vs Twi action here is pretty fascinating, but Shining's part is kept quite good as well.
You keep misspelling "changelings", though, so check/replace that. Otherwise, good work, and keep it up.
//Proofreader who is a viking
This review brought to you by the group Authors Helping Authors.
Fic Name: Fragment
Grammar Score: 9.5
Pros: The alternate uinverse tag is well-deserved and exploited to its fullest.
Description is hearty, not overwhelming, and within moments, conjures not just an image, but the entire feel of this alternate Equestria.
The separation of the Mane 6 is an interesting aspect that draws the reader into wanting to know what will happen.
Cons: Not much really. At max, there were a few times where a leap in the action caused minor confusion.
Also, I found the distinct lack of 'real' Twilight doing or saying anything after arriving odd.
Notes: As I said above, you've fully exploited the alternate universe tag, and I hope you continue this fic with much care. There is so much potential here, that I can't wait for updates. I should also say, that your lack of describing the exact manner in which runestone works or where it comes from is both a con and pro. The audience is left to (easily) infer what it can do, but the limits of it are rather open-ended.
Hope you found your review helpful. Please review my fic, Marks of Harmony.
This story, with all the mechanised war machines and cities powered by unfamiliar means...it reminds me slightly of a book called Mortal Engines, wherein all cities, towns and villages of the world move, and 'eat' each other to survive.
1938686
Thanks a lot for the review. To explain myself a bit, Original Twilight is suffering from rather severe shock after her experience. She's sleep deprived (having been up all night reading), utterly confused, and terrified. Twilight's been through a lot in the show, but this is her first real brush with death. Don't worry, she gets better though.
As for the rune engines, the next chapter's outro expands in detail on the nature of rune engines. Suffice it for now to say that there's a reason why ponies in this world are using swords and spears alongside tanks and planes.
Another review brought to you by Authors Helping Authors
Grammar: 10/10.
Pros: Great action, well described. Frenetic, but well-structured so i could tell what's going on.
Cons: More personal taste, but I'm starting to really not like one-pony armies like how Twilight and Shining are, although it's mitigated by how Twilight had surprise on her side and was eventually overwhelmed.
Looking forward to more!
Review from The Writer's Group.
God dang, I was not prepared for something like this. It's a really different sort of AU from what I usually read, and while it's overwhelming with how many themes are thrown at you at once, the reader can get used to it pretty fast. Of course, I haven't read everything, but your taste in action is great! I was especially thinking "Oh sh**" when Twilight got pissed and summoned up her tornado (although I also thought having that ability was a bit over-powered for her, unless this is just a completely different kind of Twilight altogether). You've got an interesting Sci-Fi, World War-ish scenario going here that is unlike a lot of what I find in other fanfics (if I even find anything like it) with lots of different concepts that I can tell you put a lot of time into thinking of and developing. It looks like you've got a fully fleshed-out world going for this! I'll definitely be back to check out more later, but because I found the information dump to be a bit much at first, I'll rate this an 8/10. Still, keep up the great work!
This reminds me of asri commados from Mass Effect