• Member Since 30th Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen Jul 21st, 2016

A T L A S


It's just a hobby, something I enjoy doing. Maybe one day people will enjoy it too.

T

"My name is Jay, Jay Stevens, I'm a(n) (ex-)college student. My life always has been boring and hard... until today. I have found a strange creature in a forest during a "special" night. I've taken it home, and I'm just sitting here, wondering what it is this poor animal..."

When a solitary human finds a pony during the night of his graduation, his life will make a huge twist, for good. A sweet romance and a musical story based on friendship and love. A complicated relate with simple words.

(A first/third person fic, in past and present time) (Soundtrack by Owl City)

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 28 )

It's an interesting story. I noticed some strange grammar, but it's still very good for someone writing English as a second language.

Things would be easier to read if you start a new paragraph every time a new person speaks. For example:

"Wassup?! Who it is?" "Hank, I'm Jay. It is okay if I take your car to my apartment? I need to take someone home..." "Hehehe! Finally! Well, don't stop yourself, my car is yours tonight" "And what about you?" "I met a girl, she invited me to stay for a night at her place...you don't need to know the rest" "Thanks man, I owe you one." (He was obviously drunk. How could he believe I can take a girl in the middle of nothing while raining?)

Would be better as:

"Wassup?! Who it is?"
"Hank, I'm Jay. It is okay if I take your car to my apartment? I need to take someone home..."
"Hehehe! Finally! Well, don't stop yourself, my car is yours tonight"
"And what about you?"
"I met a girl, she invited me to stay for a night at her place...you don't need to know the rest"
"Thanks man, I owe you one." (He was obviously drunk. How could he believe I can take a girl in the middle of nothing while raining?)

I like it so far. Continue please. :pinkiesad2:

Will the rest of the Mane 6 come into the story as well?

Not bad, not bad at all!
I'm gonna track this one and congrats for an amazing story.


P.S: I love Owl City.

Sorry if I'm updating slowly, but I just don't have enough time to write. School here is very heavy. Next chapter will be uploaded (hopefully) tomorrow. So don't expect this story to update fast.
And about the soundtrack, it will began in episode 8 (as I have planned), don't despair, once the songs began they will be appearing more frequently.

Don't feel pressured to put out a chapter as soon as possible.
Quality takes time, we can wait. :twilightsmile:

May I ask when the next chapter will come out? :derpytongue2: it's been like 2 weeks since the last one :ajbemused:

1959782
This week. I'm really REALLY sorry, but I'm very occupied. Since my parents are separated and I'm always travelling from a house to another I can't take some time to sit down and write, but don't worry, the next chapter has already 5,700 words so far. Just be a little more patient. I hope you understand.

Already released second episode! Finally!
Hope the amount of words compensate the two week hiatus I took.
Now, let me watch the new episode, please.
I will be working quickly on the next chapter, don't despair.
:pinkiehappy:

I love this! Next few chapters: Fluttershy discovers the zoo. Pinkie Pie discovers human parties. Rarity discovers our fashion, and Applejack discovers human rodeos. Rainbow Dash discovers NASCAR, and Twilight discovers the library in your house.
Just as ideas. I:heart::yay:!

FINALLY!! :pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy: It was awesome! And the idea of using Owl City music sounds better!
Good work. I can't wait to read the next one!

1997680
Expect a song in chapter 4.

Sorry guys if I disappointed you with the tardiness, but things went really bad last week. PEMEX tower in Mexico City exploded and my dad was there. He was injured and we had to go the capitol. Don't worry, I'll try to finish the chapter (4,500 words already) soon.

Was this originally written in another language? Most of the grammar mistakes I'm seeing look like ones common to online-translation software, or just an author who isn't a native English speaker.

2133820
I'm mexican, and most of the time I need the help of the google translator...sadly.
If I could write this like I would do, the chapters would be uploaded more quickly and with better grammar.
My English level is very basic.

2142740

No worries mate. You're doing fine. If you scout around a bit I know there are editing group that could help you with the grammar, but its not bad enough to interrupt the story.

2143008
Actually, I've been thinking about it. I will ask for some help for the next episode, I just need to finish this one...and that is the real problem.
Thank you for your comment.

Jays just like me I like cloudy days instead of sunny days

LOL it was hanks birthday wasn't it! :rainbowlaugh:

This is one of my favorite Fluttershy and human stories now.:fluttershyouch::fluttercry::fluttershbad::fluttershysad:

When are you going to update the story? If something happened or you got to do something, then I understand bro.

Comment posted by Destiny_Ruins deleted Jul 8th, 2016
Comment posted by Destiny_Ruins deleted Jul 8th, 2016
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