Well ti was funny but lets see here. Quotes...need commas errr They don't have coke or Dr.Pepper in Equestria i think and over use of omgs but other than that incredibly funny.
1889961 Ah, but how do you know, they don't have it? There's obvious evidence of fizzy/foaming drinks, and there isn't anyevidence to prove it doesn't.
Erm i just realized you told me Twilight was going to have a heart attack realization when she finds out its a strip club. I didn't see that in the story. But it's epic anyway.
This was an interesting story, but you might want to slow down a little bit, give the characters some more reactions or develop the timing of the story a bit further - Everypont just seemed to dive into everything without thinking.
Still, I'll keep an eye on this for a few chapters.
lol what
so u approve of it
Well ti was funny but lets see here. Quotes...need commas errr They don't have coke or Dr.Pepper in Equestria i think and over use of omgs but other than that incredibly funny.
Plasmadon edited version rewritten by this user helping me out alot so i thank em
Short description, what is your deal?
1894751 i am gonna be adding more soon so hold ur ponies
Where the hell did you get that cover image.
I want to know.
This story was quite funny!
Well done.
1894866 its called google my dear
1894961
Well, I don't really want "Twilight strip club" on my search history.
1894987 The artist is one 'Junglepony'. A simple Google search should bring up the dA account.
1894987 um ok
1894999
Thank you sir.
I take my leave.
This was an interesting story in any case.
I dont even....Ok this explains all of it
1895121 lol it gets better
1889961 Ah, but how do you know, they don't have it? There's obvious evidence of fizzy/foaming drinks, and there isn't anyevidence to prove it doesn't.
1895162 ..................................................................................Its....perhaps Cider?
1895219 Dr. Cider... interesting. You have just given me an idea for a one-shot. Thank you, sir!
1895248 lol lovely
1895248 That is just........Perfect...
1895321 hey no hating allowed :P
1895331 But im not a hater
1895344 i am picking dear amd i am happy i got my story offically published
1895353 Good fo you have a dashie
Before I read, as I am about to, they are all naked anyways, how does a pony strip club even work?
1895400i have a derpy lol
1895413 read and see lol
1895420
It is good so far. also, my exact response to how fast you replied was "HolyshitIdidnotexpectaresponsethatfast!" all in one word in my head!
"Well, that escalated quickly..."
I anticipate more.
1895661 yea next chapter is gonna be hell for twilight
1895495 teehee lol
chapter 1 comming soon
She then walked through the door, and things went wrong in so many ways., i love it when things go wrong. makes the story interesting.
Erm i just realized you told me Twilight was going to have a heart attack realization when she finds out its a strip club. I didn't see that in the story. But it's epic anyway.
1897609 oh trust me she will get her heart attack lol
1897793 alright....
Good luck with your Story, SilverPony. I'll do the same to mine as well.
Last line = Story told in one line
Twilight x Rarity? Now theres one I haven't heard before. Interesting story, but I don't think i'mm going to continue it. Sorry.
1899518 its ok
1899238 glad you enjoyed it
This story. OH, THIS STORY.
Made me lol
1902425 glad u like it
Not First!
1905686 haha
i like how applebloom was oblivious
1905930 it gets better
dear god
This was an interesting story, but you might want to slow down a little bit, give the characters some more reactions or develop the timing of the story a bit further - Everypont just seemed to dive into everything without thinking.
Still, I'll keep an eye on this for a few chapters.