• Published 17th Jan 2012
  • 1,855 Views, 106 Comments

The Donors - GoesKaboom



The truth about Pumpkin and Pound Cake's parentage.

  • ...
2
 106
 1,855

Parturient

For a few minutes, Carrot just stared unseeingly at the pregnancy test, not sure if this was actually happening, or if it was some crazy dream that his stressed-out brain had come up with. Even Cup's words sounded eerily hollow- they were going to be parents. The long-shot, experimental treatment from Manehattan had actually worked. The odds of that happening were about equivalent to Nightmare Moon herself appearing in the middle of the shop and asking him to tea. He stared at the pregnancy test some more, and then, almost as suddenly as the news had come, his brain snapped back into business mode.

“This is terrible!” the orange stallion moaned. “Of all the days for you to get pregnant it had to be today! The anniversary party! How are we going to have everything ready in time if we're down a baker!?”

“I'll be downstairs in a minute,” Cup replied, making to get up from the bed. But Carrot put his hoof down.

“No you're not! Not in your condition! You are going to stay up here and rest. Then I am going to go find Dr. Null Result and get you checked up! Don't you know how dangerous this is- you can't go to a huge party like this when you're pregnant!” Before Cup could protest, Carrot cut across, saying: “Don't worry, Pinkie and I will manage.”


“You mean Mrs. Cake is PREGNANT?!” the pink mare screeched. “You are going to be a mommy and a daddy? You're going to have a foal?

“That's what it means, yes,” Carrot replied. Pinkie Pie immediately hugged him.

“Yay! I'm going to be the best auntie ever!” she chanted. “I'll make it cake and ice cream and teach it how to have parties, and how to eat sugar cubes and sundaes and sarsaparilla!” Carrot had to chuckle. Pinkie was almost as excited at the prospect as he and Cup were. But his happiness was short-lived. They still had the mother of all parties to pull off, and with Cup unable to help, there was simply no time for Pinkie Pie's shenanigans, not if they wanted to finish everything in time.

“Yes, we're all very excited, Pinkie, but we can be excited after work! We've got to get this food finished!”

“Oh, no worries,” the pink mare replied. “I finished it all while you were upstairs!”

Planning to rebut her, saying that there was simply no possible way that she could have finished all that work by herself in fifteen minutes, Carrot turned to survey the complete nightmare that he knew awaited him. The words died on his tongue, however- Pinkie had, in fact, finished all the work. Everything, from the gigantic cake to the armada of cupcakes to the bushels of cookies, were ready for delivery and consumption.

“Wha... wha... how?” was all the astounded stallion could manage. Pinkie Pie just grinned at him.

“I have my ways, Mr. Cake,” she replied cryptically before skipping off to load the treats into the transport wagon. Mr. Cake just sighed. He would never understand that mare... although he would have paid good money to figure out exactly how she'd managed to do all that work in such a short period of time. As it was, he'd have to look into giving her a pay raise.

The party turned out to be a roaring success. Lyra and BonBon loved the treats Carrot and Pinkie had brought, and Lyra insisted that the two bakers stay and enjoy the party. “It's my anniversary, and if I want you to stay, you're going to stay, and that's final!” the mint-colored unicorn mare said sternly when Carrot tried to make his excuses. Berry Punch and her husband, Malt Liquor, had provided the drinks, and the libations were freely flowing. The Apple family had supplemented the food the Cakes provided with their own delicious apple confections, and as a special treat, Derpy Hooves had flown all the way to Canterlot to pick up a batch of gourmet muffins from Princess Celestia's personal favorite bakery. Vinyl Scratch was DJ-ing, and almost as soon as she'd gotten started, Pipsqueak and Dinky Doo got into a dance-off, much to the amusement of the adult ponies.

“Carrot Cake!” an ecstatic BonBon shouted about halfway through the party, making her way towards the stallion through the sea of partying ponies. “You'ver really outdone yourself this time- these are the best bucking cookies I've ever eaten!”

“Actually, Cup baked these, and Pinkie Pie frosted them,” Carrot replied, not wanting to unfairly take credit. “I'll be sure to let them know you liked them!” BonBon smiled.

“Say, where is Cup, anyway?”

“Oh... she's not feeling well,” Carrot replied, hoping that the other mare would drop the subject. Sure, he and Cup couldn't be happier about the pregnancy, but he wasn't sure if the time was right to let anypony else know, at least not yet. After all, wasn't it generally accepted that you didn't tell anypony until the mare reached the second trimester? So many things could potentially go wrong in early pregnancy... and if the unthinkable did happen and Cup miscarried, how would they explain it to the entirety of Ponyville? And there was no doubt in Carrot's mind that it would come to that- nopony in this town could keep a secret. Everypony would know within five minutes of the announcement.

Unfortunately, BonBon didn't get the hint. “Oh no! She didn't eat basil again, did she? She knows what it does to her. Oh, it wasn't the oranges, was it? I know Carrot Top and Bluenotes were sick after eating that last batch that came into the market.”

“Um, no, that's not it,” Carrot said haltingly, trying to quickly think up an excuse. However, he didn't have to- Pinkie Pie butted in.

“Oh, BonBon, Mr. Cake didn't tell you? Mrs. Cake is pregnant!”

There literally was a record scratch after Pinkie Pie's statement (Vinyl Scratch had slipped and accidentally moved the record at the wrong time). The entire party fell silent for a moment, and then, an excited “squee” sound began lowly, then crescendo-ed to a roar. Immediately, Carrot found himself inundated with well-wishers all congratulating him on the good news.

“I know you'll be a wonderful papa!” Derpy exclaimed, drawing the orange stallion into a hug. “If you need anything, just let me know, I'm sure I've got Dinky's old foal stuff around here somewhere!”

“Ah was wonderin' when a spry young stallion like yerself would git settled in and start yerself a family,” Granny Smith told him. “Ah was startin' to wonder if yeh were one-a them 'foal-free' types Ah keep hearin' about!”

“Oooh, maybe we can be Cutie Mark Crusader Babysitters!”

“Oh... oh my. You're going to be a father? Well, if you want, I can give you some baby blankets... that is, if you don't mind terribly much and you want them...” Fluttershy provided hesitantly.

“Of course you're going to need to read up on foalbirth and parenting,” Twilight Sparkle exclaimed, running up to confront the baker. “And you'll want some name books, of course... come by the library tomorrow and I'll have a stack of pertinent books ready for you!”

Carrot winced inwardly as pony after pony came up to him to congratulate him and Cup for the wonderful news. Unfortunately, a good amount of those congratulations came with parenting advice of one sort or another, completely unsolicited.

“Be as careful around Cup Cake as possible until the foals are born,” Cranky Doodle Donkey advised. “When I lived in Las Pegasus for a year, my neighbor bucked her husband out of a window when she was pregnant, because he didn't bring her the right kind of pie!”

“And you might want to lock Cup up away from any alcohol until your foal is born,” Malt Liquor advised. “When Berry was pregnant with Ruby Pinch I basically had to lock her in the bedroom so she wouldn't drink. It's bad for the foals, see?” Carrot backed away slowly. He knew that the relationship between Ponyville's resident liquor store owners was a complicated one, but he really didn't want to hear the details of Berry Punch's alcoholism, or the ways that her husband and child dealt with it...

Luckily, Zecora noticed the stallion's discomfort and intervened. “It seems you took my advice, and it was money well spent. It seems it worked, since now Cup Cake is pregnant.” Carrot smiled.

“Thank you, Zecora,” he replied. “You certainly did point us in the right direction.”

Eventually, though, the news spread throughout the party and everypony who wanted to come up to share their knowledge wit h Carrot did so. All things being equal, however, the party was for Lyra and BonBon, and once the novelty of the idea of the Cakes being parents had worn off, everypony quickly went back to partying, for the most part.

Carrot wasn't sure if he should be annoyed with Pinkie Pie or relieved that she'd taken the pressure off of him to come up with excuses for Cup. On one hoof, it wasn't Pinkie's place to tell everypony about the news, especially not without clearing it with himself or Cup first. On the other, however, he knew BonBon. That mare was notorious for weaseling information out of whoever she set her sights on. Carrot knew that if the conversation had continued, it would only have been a matter of time before she broke him down and found out what she wanted to know.


The next few months were among the best that the bakers could remember. Everypony was so happy for them. Derpy Hooves made good on her promise that she'd made at the party, and came by a few days later with a load of baby things. Including, of all things, a high-quality teak-wood crib. “I won't be having any more foals, so this stuff is all yours now!” the walleyed mare said cheerily. Cup and Carrot were shocked.

“Derpy, there's no way we can accept this,” a surprised Cup said quietly. “This stuff must have cost a fortune!”

“Nah,” Derpy replied. “Almost all of this stuff was in an abandoned storage locker on Boxy Stacks' property. When he found out I was pregnant with Dinky Doo he gave it all to me for a couple bits. It's no trouble at all- you need it more than I do, and it's just taking up space in my house!”

The Cakes tried to protest more, saying that they couldn't possibly accept it for free, but Derpy was insistent. “Just consider it payment for Dinky's birthday cake.”

In the end, they realized that there was no way to make the mailmare change her mind, so the Cakes gratefully accepted the gift, only after making sure Derpy knew that she was welcome to free muffins whenever she wanted them. It went against the baker couple's code of ethics too much for them to accept such an expensive present for no payment at all, and figured lifetime muffins would be a fair trade. Derpy happily accepted, immediately chowing down o n a chocolate chip one.

Twilight Sparkle as well kept her promise and came by with a load of books on topics she thought would be of interest to the expecting parents- foalbirth, child psychology, parenting manuals, even a few baby name books.

Fluttershy and Applejack also came by the shop to share some things they thought might be useful, and Rarity sent a note wanting to know if Cup would need any maternity clothes.

What was harder to feel grateful for was the constant outpouring of unsolicited advice from the other denizens of Ponyville. “Be sure to watch your figure!” Carrot Top admonished, upon seeing Cup snacking on some flan. “You'll put on baby weight, of course, but if you put on too much, you'll never get it off! Besides, flan already goes straight to your flank as it is!”

“Yes, thank you,” Cup said dryly, not appreciating the other mare insinuating that she was fat.

“Oh, do be aware of your wife's moods,” Mr. Breezy warned Carrot one day, as he went shopping for a new exhaust fan for the oven. “My ex-wife was a complete monster when she was pregnant! Of course, it turned out that the colt wasn't mine, it was the damned delivery-stallion's...” he muttered under his breath, going on a tangent about horrible cheating wives.

A few more weeks passed, and Cup was beginning to show her pregnancy. Rarity finished making her a new maternity wardrobe (99% of which Cup wasn't sure where she would ever wear it, pregnant or not). And Pinkie Pie was getting even more excited for being able to play with the new baby pony. Even Twilight Sparkle was beginning to take an interest, coming to Cup with a proposition. Or, technically, with an idea that didn't start out as a proposition at all, but a passing idea. She had been reading a new book, and wanted to ask Mrs. Cake what she thought of one of the concepts.

“Have you ever been to a baby shower?” Cup couldn't say that she had. Of course, though, there was somepony in Sugar Cube Corner who had.

“What a great idea, Twilight!” Pinkie exclaimed. “We should totally throw Mrs. Cake a baby shower! Call everypony and tell them to bring presents! I'll get my spare party supplies! We can have everything ready in an hour!”

“Pinkie Pie!” Twilight nearly yellled. “Do you even know what a baby shower is?” Pinkie actually looked offended.

“Of course I know what a baby shower I! You have one when one of your friends is pregnant! Everypony brings presents for that will be useful when the foal arrives!” Twilight nodded.

“I think it would be best if we waited a few days, so everypony has time to come up with really good presents. And we'll need treats... maybe we can get some from BonBon's shop?”

“Okie-dokie-lokie! Just let me know when we should hold this party, and I'll get everything ready!” The two mares hurried off, probably to begin the preparations, leaving a rather confused Cup behind. Baby shower? Presents? What was going on?

To Be Continued

Author's Comments:

I don't actually have all that much to say about this particular chapter, but I am going to give a heads-up about the next one. I don't think this is really necessary, but in the past I've experienced on certain other sites that you need to tack warnings onto every single thing that could be considered potentially offensive unless you want the wrath of god rained down upon you, so I'm putting it here. Next chapter, we get back into the part of the plot dealing with the bio-dads, and as such, there is a portrayal of a very dysfunctional marriage. It is not abusive, per se, but it is definitely not the happy marriage that the Cakes have. Like I said before, I don't really think it's all that bad, but I just thought I'd do some good old CYA in preparation.

Thanks for reading!