Part 3
Finally! Lunch break! And a good one, too.
Not only were you able to tell those three fillies how you got your Cutie Mark, but you were able to do it in the middle of class, as a class project! Genius! Two birds with one stone!
With your troubles solved in the first half of the school day, you sit down in the school cafeteria, taking a large, welcoming bite out of your soft, scrumptious egg and cress sandwich…
“Hey, there you are! We wanna ask you somethin’!”
You don’t know how those fillies became so good at sneaking, but somehow they’re now all sitting at the same table as you. Apple Bloom, the girl who called you, sits opposite, while her two partners-in-crime sit on either side.
Sighing internally, you finish chewing your food before politely telling them to go away.
“Come on, girls, I already told you how I got my Cutie Mark in class. I wasn’t even aware of it until the next morning, so chances are you just have to wait until you find what you’re good at naturally. Now can you please- ”
“That’s not what we wanna talk about.” the bow-wearing filly clarifies, dumping her lunch bag onto the table. Looks like she intends to stay.
You cram another bite of your sandwich into your mouth with the intent of finishing it as fast as possible so you can leave. You’ve already had today’s fill of ‘stupidity’ with Snips and Snails.
“You see, a while ago, I learned a little something special from my big sister and her friends,” Apple Bloom begins what will no doubt be a boring girly-girl story, “You see, she’d learned that she had this special connection with her friends long, long before they’d even met. Like they were all experiencin’ the same funonimun.”
“Funoni-what?” Scootaloo asks. Sweetie Belle scratches her head in thought.
“Fun-nom-nom-um? I think it’s more like ‘fin-nonny-mum’.”
“Fun… femnomnoman?”
“Fee, no, nah, maaa..?”
“Phenomenon,” you drag the girls’ discussion back on track, swallowing another bite of sandwich and starting on the crusts like a good colt, “Your sister’s friends were sharing the same phenomenon. What‘s this got to do with me, again?”
“We’re just gettin’ to that!” Apple Bloom insists, “Anyway, they weren’t the only ponies who share that special connection. Apparently, all ponies with a strong sense of love and friendship end up with somethin’ similar. And a couple weeks ago, we found out what that was for us.”
Ah. The cootie-ridden ones think that the powers-that-be have some sort of divine purpose that links you to them for all eternity.
That’s not crazy and stupid at all!
“So if you’re telling me the truth here,” you slowly try to pick this theory apart, “Then at one point in our lives, we all had some major event that ties us together. Gee whiz, what about Nightmare Moon’s revival? Everypony had a longer night than usual, is everypony in Equestria best buddies now?”
“You’re cheeky,” the bow-maned leader pouts, her bottom lip sticking out in an uncomfortably adorable way, “But you know what I’m referrin’ to.”
Aw, come on, if they’re trying to pry their snouts into your personal life like they were in class… wait.
“Is this about my dad again? It was creepy enough that you knew pretty much everything about what happened to him, now you want to keep rubbing my nose in it!?” You can’t decide whether you should feign offence and grief so they’d leave you alone, or whether you were genuinely offended.
“But we’re not rubbing your nose in it,” the orange-coated tomboy suddenly butts in after giving up on hiding her frustration, “The only reason we know so much about what happened to your dad is because it’s happened to mine too! He died on the same train! And both of Apple Bloom’s parents! And Swee- no, wait, actually, they both survived. Her big sister too. But they were on the train when it happened, that’s the point I’m trying to make!”
“Scootaloo!” Sweetie Belle squeaks, “Apple Bloom was gonna break that to him gently!”
“She was takin’ forever-!”
“I’m done.” A simple declaration from yourself to the Cutie Mark Personalspaceinvaders. “Not listening to this anymore. I know for a fact that you’re making this whole thing up! I might not remember it fully because I was too young at the time, but we have the newspaper clippings back home and the paper clearly states that the only ponies that suffered in the crash were my dad - the train driver - a married couple coming back from Manehattan and a stallion protecting his foal.”
Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Ding! Your epiphany is ready!
“Oh.”
“Yeah.” the pink-bowed head of the group nods when it all starts to sink in, “So now that we’re all connected, you can see why we’d think you’re such a vital part of us getting our Cutie Marks.”
“And then there’s the whole ‘cosmic friends forever’ thing.”
“Priorities, Scoots. Priorities.”
As shocking as this revelation is, you still aren’t entirely comfortable hanging out with these girls. Best use whatever resources you have to make them go away for now. You can worry about supposed destiny - and with that the giant question mark hanging over the very concept of free will - later.
“So, you think I can help you get a Cutie Mark, right?” you muse aloud, recalling your own experience as much as you can, “I think you girls should, uh, instead of just thinking of silly things to get a Cutie Mark in, wait for the opportunity for the Cutie Mark to come to you. It’s what I did.”
Your idea is met with silence by the three fillies. It’s as if it never occurred to them to just chill out for half a day, waiting for a situation to arise rather than just kicking up the situation itself.
“That… might… work?” the unicorn shrugs, “We could give that a shot, at least.”
“Oh, come on, Sweetie Belle,” Scootaloo moans, “Why spend our time waiting for our Cutie Marks to come when we can get them ourselves? What are the odds that our destinies are gonna just pop up in front of us like-”
“-a bag full of chocolate muffins?”
The three Crusaders turn their heads toward the source of the voice; Dinky Doo, a dainty filly from the year below, is sitting across the cafeteria table from you, peering into her brown lunch bag with a hum of disappointment.
“But Mom knows I can’t have too many chocolate ones, or else I’ll get a tummy ache!” she continues, “Aw, what am I gonna have for lunch now..?”
You nod at Apple Bloom, as if to say ‘Yeah, that’s your cue’. The terrible trio exchange knowing glances before going into full ‘Crusader’ mode.
“Cutie Mark Crusaders Independent Traders! Hooray!”
A blink later and they’ve left your side, only to commence a series of rabid bartering with the confused filly.
Great job! They’re distracted! Now get out while you can!
You snatch the remains of your lunch and high-tail it out of there.
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Asosmwe
YES! Operation Muffin Button was a success!
i.chzbgr.com/completestore/2011/9/6/f8c3b45c-a44f-4663-805b-3bb46fd90465.jpg
Now that's a little harsh, using Dinky to distract them.
Oh man, this is epic. I'm so that colt! I'd be a little younger, but good with mechanics, distracting people, sidestepping others, etc., that's so me! And the epiphany part; LOL!
cutie mark crusaders free Traders? i swear i heard that one before......... oh yeah the one with the post Office unicorn and ditzy.
Dinky!
, she just makes everything better with your presence....I love her cameo and tying in with "More than Buddies"....right now, her mom is getting it on with her new Dad 
-- will we ever see more of that story? 
Hehe, "phenomenon"...suddenly, I'm having trouble spelling that word XD.
As I expected, now you are beginning to link "me" with the CMC...I like how you play around with the whole "cosmic friends forever" thing - indeed, this kid is looking smarter and smarter for his age, with every chapter, but it is funny in it's own way...like how he begins to question free will
Can't wait to see what happens next ^_^
According to Pinkie Pie logic, yes
i feel like it should be "So, you think i can help you get a Cutie Mark, right?" Also, they usually yell "YAY!" not "Hurray," but that's a minor nitpick.
2362010 Tis a reference to one of Crowley's fics WAY long ago. Read his
fic, and all shall become clear...
2365150 I did!
MWAHAHAHA!
2367116
And I helped!
This is basically me. You have created me. I bet that in your mind he has a dark blue coat with a silver mane. It's true. You know it.
lol, I was wondering when I would see this
And there we have the connection to "More Than Buddies".
This kid is not me, he's a pure grade A douchebag... i'm like grade C.
I understand the feelings and the behaviour of that colt since I am like that, I never liked socializing with anyone unless I am forced to, the main difference between him and I is that I don't speak much to others, regardless if they do talk to me. It's not because I have nothing to say It's because I am not interested in their conversation so i don't want to have anything to do with it
Still me. I never liked being around people.
Is it just me or does everyone imagine a foal form of their OC on these kind of fanfics?
Look! A Distraction!
"What where?!?"
2370695
how did you know?
2367155 they got the parts off me