• Member Since 25th Aug, 2011
  • offline last seen Jan 15th, 2016

Balkanboy


Became a brony after I inadvertently stumbled upon an episode. Interests include: Halo, Civilisation 5, C&C, D&D (sometimes), sleeping, etc.

E

After the 'Canterlot Wedding' incident the Changeling swarm was scattered across the land, enslaved by pony warlords and slavers beyond the borders of Equestria. Weak, desperate and with only a dozen changelings to her name, Queen Chrysalis resorts to summoning one of the most obscure creatures in mythology; a human.

Thanks to zinger906 for giving me the idea for this story.

Chapters (5)
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Comments ( 315 )
Karna #1 · Dec 27th, 2012 · · 2 · Dinner ·

William's thoughts: Ha. Ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha! NO.

Damn, how is this already featured? Still, it's not bad. Not bad at all.

Very well done sir! I eagerly await more chapters.

i must say congratulations it's pretty interesting . i like it good job

Meanwhile…
His eyes were clenched shut waiting for the pane or some other sensation. He felt tingly for a moment but nothing else really happened. Slowly he opened his eyes to reveal his normal hole ridden hooves. He lifted one of them and poked himself a couple of times.

“I’m alive! I’m still alive!” He shouted in joy, hovering up and doing a quick spin in the air before settling back down to see…

Creatures, al sat around dozens of round tables looking rather shocked. But not just any creatures, creatures that roughly resembled the one Chrysalis meant to summon.

Somewhere in the back ground a glass smashed against the floor.

Smiling sheepishly he searched for something to say. “Uh… Hi!” He guessed the Queens interpretation of the spell hadn’t been the best.

Layeth the smacketh down on these holy bugs.

Can I get an amen?

1861700

:rainbowlaugh: Yeah I was thinking of doing that. I still haven't made up my mind...

I actully went Awwwww at the shivering filly part.

Exellent fic so far, it's so going to my favorites.

1861744
Do it if you can. That should be interesting.

Your chapter title is evil! I keep thinking I have a notification or something :derpytongue2:.

My thoughts (In emoticons):
:ajsmug:
:derpytongue2:
:fluttershbad:
:fluttershyouch:
:raritystarry:
:raritywink:
:pinkiehappy:
:twilightoops:
Anyway, good story, i'll be keeping up with this. :twilightsmile:

1862037 Agreed. Balkan? Could you remove the first parenthese to keep the confusion down?

Now back to the chapter. I'll edit in my review when I'm done.

Edit: Alright, now I'm curious how long ago the last human summoning was.

So far all we know is that they "know" humans like the cold and are bloodthirsty.

I ignore the "eats fillies/children" because EVERYONE in ancient times used that to describe their enemies and inspire hatred in their fellow man for said enemies.

This very weakly points to Scandinavian viking berserkers or the post Rome Galic tribes... we'll have to wait and see.

i think this is the first human in equestria story i've actually enjoyed reading

1861514
I dunno, if it's anything like veal....nummy.
Just, you know, ignore the whimpering and crying for mommy. Easy.

...a shivering filly, her head in her hooves.

Ah, I like to see the monster stereotype much more than the "Human's are assholes" one, good to see that someone else agrees!

1862214 Monster stereotype? This sounds more like my lawyer.:pinkiehappy:

Aru
Aru #17 · Dec 27th, 2012 · · 2 · Dinner ·

At least filly is alive....... fresh and good for consumption.

Edit: Okay that sounds plainly bad.

This... sounds actually pretty good, I am curious as to if our protagonist has any technology on him. The filly should also provide fruitful entertainment for the future. Fav'd and Thumbed

1861700 Best "MEANWHILE" I've ever read. Here, have a moustache :moustache:

OK, how could a hamburger possibly end up looking like a pony? lol. This guy must have negative skill level. Or maybe the pony is just paranoid.

1862256 Ah lawyer jokes, they never stop being funny. I mean the stereo type that Humans are child eating monsters and such

Dark and Everyone tags? ....I'm in.

why can there not be ONE story with blood-lusting, russian-style humans?

1862824

Heh, yeah. In case you're wondering how, think batman the cartoon series. It's got some fairly dark things in it, but anyone can still watch it.

1862835 Just so you know: Most of the stories I read with dark in them are teen rated. So I am pretty much happy that there is another good story that doesn't over do the dark themes.

Horse meat, yum! The older ones have more flavor, but eh. Still a good source of protein. :applecry: Don't tell me you wouldn't nom a horse if you needed it to survive in harsh, snowy, wilderness, just because it is a cowering tiny animal, that might have sapience?

Don't get the wrong idea. Sentience and sapience are different. Proper word choice goes a long way. Not that I've noticed any problems yet. Just in general. I believe if someone does not use a word often, or has not heard it in context from reliable sources; it should be looked it up.

And if ponies like the two that encountered William this chapter are that stupid, aggressive, and cowardly, they deserve to painfully run into trees, every day.

“You’re lying.” Her horn started to glow. “Tell me what you did!”

“Nothing, I swear! He hit his head on the floor then ran into a tree!” That had sounded better in his mind.

She seemed shocked, but that quickly turned to anger as she let off a bolt of energy at him.

You can't get much more clear with that phrasing. It was an accident, William let her know, and the pony still attacked him.
So I don't get why William thought his explanation sounded better in his mind. Jeez, why does everyone who encounters a human, in most stories, have some insane confirmation bias? Doesn't anyone follow something resembling scientific method? :facehoof:

So far, so good!

1862882

Basically she thinks that what the sentence means is the human slammed his head against the ground then smacked his head against the tree. She didn't really think that her friend would run into a tree on purpose. I probably should have made it clearer.

Also thanks for that advice on word choice. I was very close to making that mistake.

The idea? Genius!:pinkiehappy: The reactions? Meh, could be better. But thinking about it would make the updates take too long, so I don't care! ...Wait... Didn't I get a negative outcome when I think like that? :rainbowderp:

Wow, there is some stories out there with humans that have strong immunity to magic but this is on a new level. He is completely disrupting their magic ability by just standing close to them.

and please don't tell me he is going to kill that filly.

still, can't wait for more.

If I were in this story:
"Chrysalis got me a pet pony? YAYY!" *heart attack*

1862941
What you've said about the female pony's interpretation of the situation, and William's phrasing; it backs the points I've made.
You could make her confusion more descriptive if you wanted, but it is unnecessary in my opinion. The thoughts behind her actions are evident, by the path she took.
The situation itself, in how he attacked him, was shortsighted. It was irrational fear. If anyone did something like that to me for a similar situation, and apologized afterward, if at all, I'd at least grill them for it, and make it public, so that they don't forget, and hopefully not do something so rash again. Some people sue, which I am not sure is what William would do, or if Equestrian legal courts would recognize his claim, seeing as there were no witnesses...if they even have courts. No harm, no foul, is not enough for intention, and what could have happened. What if the mare decided to use physics instead, blasting a tree so it would topple on him, or hurling a stone at William, rather than shooting a beam at him since it dissipates? An object in motion, remains in motion, unless stopped by an outside force yeah? Tragedy.
Assault, without attempting proper diplomacy is serious business. Shoot first, ask questions later, trigger happy, on the verge of hysteria... Those descriptions come to mind when I view the mare you've written.
She asked him what he did, and he has the intelligence to provide a clear answer. She screws it up by letting emotion take over so much.

1863062

You're right, it's true. There is a reason why she acted so stupidly though, one which was supposed to be explained later, but it looks like I should have explained it here. I won't say what it is, but just think about the story's title.

1862374>>1862814

Yay! My first three mustaches!

Good start, you got a fav and a like good sir.

Suggestion though, continue to show changeling quirks and try to build on that. Don't forget to come back to the human perspective on things.

Other than that, good luck!

1863095
So This village is one where the tales of humans are still told?

1861700 This needs to be a side story now

lol! She thought he liked to snatch up children and eat them XD

1861700 That should totally be a story of its own.

Chrysalis, myth does not usually translate to fact. Take everything in those stories with a grain of salt.

awww that poor filly hope she's going to be okay

1862471 I actually wasn't joking.........she is a frightening woman.

1863934 If it ever came down to it, I'd much rather have a lawyer that can intimidate someone rather than one who looked too easygoing.

1863948 Yeah. That's why I never hired a new one.:ajsmug:

messed up cliffhanger but I still want to see what happens.

Zed

Very interesting. Now we get to see who's the bridge burning champion of Equestria.

It would be awesome, if human "influence" would prevent ponies from holding things with their hooves. Just to see the look on the guards face when he cant even get a grip on his spear....:pinkiecrazy:

1861700

Throwing my vote in for side story. Make it happen :pinkiehappy:

1864736
"Someponies think they can outmagic me.
Mabye... -sniff- Mabye....
I have yet to meet a pony that can outmagic bullet:pinkiecrazy:"

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