Our Time to Fly

by Shokinaw

Chapter 10: Push to the Sky

Chapter: 10

Push to the Sky

Time was slipping away for Spike and the rest of the new Flight Team. There were only a few weeks left before the big show, and they were officially dubbed ‘crunch time’. Each when, where, and how in the show’s narrative needed to be answered with an appropriate flying formation or maneuver. Training quickly overtook almost every aspect of their lives, and it mostly consisted of drilling the timing of every little detail deep into muscle memory. Pushing themselves to perfect each stunt along their doggedly deliberated flight path, each flap had to be carefully considered in their rigorous routines. Mornings would find them in near non-stop rehearsals of their formations, control, and flight work. Afternoons were spent under Rainbow Dash’s tenacious tweaking and honing of each of their individual talents and chosen stunts.

Evenings were to be spent with family and friends resting their bodies, and mentally preparing for the quickly approaching deadline. Left to Spike’s own devices, life questions tended to win out over thoughts of the upcoming competition, usually somewhere between his overabundance of new chores and thoughts of his future. Especially the very new and raw idea passed to him by Rarity the night of her farewell party. He was laying down on his stomach in his sparse, little room in the library, going over old stories, books, and pictures of childhood dreams that were scattered around the floor. Tossing a clawful of small, flawed jewels into his maw like a pony would eat popcorn, his gem supply had never been so huge. Usually it was curbed by their vigilance to stunt his growth, but as long as he was eating them, and not hoarding them, his body obediently remained the same size much to his relief. He thought Twilight was going to throw a fit when he first brought home the strict diet Rainbow Dash had made up. Life was inexpensive for a pony, Dash’s diet was made almost completely of grass. It sounded incredibly bland, and when asked, his Captain confirmed his suspicions.

“Just one of the sacrifices a top athlete has to make when coming down the last stretch of competition training.”

That’s what she told him, but he sensed a hint of pride hidden in her words. Scootaloo’s was a bit different; lots of grass still, but there was an equal amount of protein-filled grain, mostly to help keep up with her seemingly endless supply of energy. His own made his mouth water. Gems, jewels, and coal! Well, the coal wasn’t great. He never really liked the stuff, but it wasn’t hard to tell the difference in him after he began eating it steadily. Getting up in the morning no longer seemed as much of a chore, and he just felt like he had more energy in general than he used to. Twilight just laughed to herself and handed him back the grocery list with wink, and said it wouldn’t be a problem. Much to his surprise, it didn’t seem to be either. By the next afternoon their cupboards were filled with different flavours of cheap gems, and there was a large horse cart filled with coal in the backyard.

Spike wasn’t the type of dragon to look a gift horse in the mouth, but it had made him curious about where Twilight had attained this supply so easily. Right now, though, his attention was more focused on what sat in front of him. Each drawing depicted him in a variety of dangerous endeavors that usually involved rescuing ponies, or fighting an over-powered villain. Twilight was always trying to spend her time as efficiently as she could, often looking for ways to combine many tasks into one. For example she would concentrate her magic studies in areas that would also help her friends out of a jam. Currently Spike was trying to mimic his mentor. He wanted to do as well as he could at the competition, but unlike Scootaloo, he now knew what he wanted for himself and his future. He wanted to become the dragon in these pictures.

Combing through all the resources the library had to offer, he looked for a type of hero training he could use to help his chances in the competition, but only one thing really stuck out. Before him, separated from the rest of the scribbles were many different pictures of a dragon using fire breath to get itself out of predicaments, fighting to help extinguish fires, rescuing ponies from fiery deaths, or anything that even remotely related to fire, and there was a lot of those. It had occurred to him that a heroic dragon could fly and do stunts really well, so he was already well on the way to his first steps of hero training without ever having known it. The pictures told him he also needed to have a lot of control over his fire, coincidentally their flight show called for a whole lot of that very same thing. Especially since Rainbow Dash figured that bouts of green flame is one thing they could be absolutely sure no other flight team had.

Now everything he could find on the subject of fire control could be found hidden among the childish drawings dotting his bedroom floor. Most of the books were about training firefighters. The training to be a volunteer firefighter in Ponyville was a pretty strict one unsurprisingly. It usually involved being a pegasus of some sort, and a lot of stormcloud control. Being able to make it rain anywhere was their largest defense against the ravages of fire. Unfortunately the books were always more about prevention measures over actual fire fighting methods. He found more information in reading about famous natural disasters, which made him feel morbid for taking so much interest in them. It also made him feel anxious as Twilight would most certainly start asking questions if she seen more than one book on disasters in his room. He was currently in the middle of this one article about a forest fire they’d managed to stop by setting controlled fires ahead of it. The idea was taking away the fuel the raging disaster would need to keep its wildfire spreading before it could get there when he heard Twilight’s voice float up from downstairs.

“Spike? Are you ready?”

“Does it matter?” He muttered to himself at the interruption, standing up to make his way down. He would have liked to say his evenings were spent entirely focused on the Fledgling Flier Competition like his teammates probably did, but Spike knew he had other responsibilities too. One of his newest came in the form of a somewhat dim unicorn Twilight had recently taken in as her secondary assistant. He liked Snails well enough, he was even known to hang out with Snips and him on a few occasions. He wasn’t sure why Twilight was insisting on turning the slow-witted pony into her new apprentice, though. He wasn’t against the idea, like Snips, he had a soft spot for the guy, but it just wasn’t very much like the Twilight Sparkle he knew. Snails would never have met the checklist criteria she’d have made for an assistant, so what changed? What had been going on while he was training? How far had he fallen out of Twilight’s life? How much had his big sister grown while he wasn’t looking? His pride and joy had always been being there for her, and now...

Now he had to wonder what he was losing spending all this time away from her. He wasn’t sure he liked it. Actually, no. He was absolutely certain he didn’t like it.

He trudged down the stairs to see Snails struggling to keep three heavy books suspended in the air. They were barely wobbling and trembling in place, and there was a look of extreme concentration present on the unkept unicorn’s face. It was a surprise to see! Telekinesis was never one of Snail’s stronger spells, usually he had trouble levitating even a single homework assignment for any real length of time. The magic required focusing on the task at hand, and Snails was always quick to be distracted. Holding up three books for an extended period as he was now, was actually really impressive! It must have taken weeks of training to get to this point. A twinge of regret kicked him when he had to wonder how all this came to be when normally he’d be the first in the know.

Spike instinctively grabbed a cloth to wipe the sweat from Snail’s brow. A slight nod of thanks was the only answer from the straining unicorn as he continued to concentrate on the task at hoof. It had been a token gesture he often did for Twilight when she was in the middle of a spell that took all of her focus. He was normally treated to a smile that had made him swell with pride all throughout his youth. His sister was treating him with another one now, and it was making him blush slightly with his previous thoughts still fresh in his mind. He swiftly found out that smile could still made him swell with pride.

“What did you need me for again?” He asked while trying to mask the mixed set of feelings. It wasn’t one of the many questions he wanted to ask, but he wasn’t sure how to approach any of those subjects.

“I know you’re busy preparing for the flight show,” Twilight answered as she moved over to him, speaking quietly so as to not interrupt the young stallion’s spell casting, “but Snails and I could really go for some supper soon. We ended up skipping lunch for his magic studies.”

“Oh, right. Sure I got that. I’ll just throw on some veggie burgers and hay fries, it won’t take long.” Ducking under the arch of the doorway and into the kitchen, the young dragon opened the wood stove and awoke the sleeping embers with a quick and convenient puff of flame. He let out a long sigh as he was setting up the rest of the food he’d need while waiting for the stove to heat up. His thoughts turned away from the mundane task and towards the many adventures he had shared with his older sister. Everything had always focused on her and her friends, of course, he was just there to help. In a way that was exactly how he liked it. Just helping others when and where he could. He was the side to their show, the extra guiding claw where it was needed, the underlying support to the Elements of Harmony. It was like a not-so-secret pride, a great respect he had for himself. He didn’t need the glory, their glory was his.

Before he knew it things had changed, as they so often did in the little chaotic town of Ponyville. This time, he wasn’t the sidekick, this time he was a large part of the flight show Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo cooked up. While he always enjoyed a copious amount of attention, the idea of being the one under the spotlight was a foreign concept to him. If he was honest with himself, he preferred the role of the sidekick. It was just enough attention without all the weight of responsibility that came with making those big decisions. He was a follower, not a leader, and he liked it that way. Most of his life had been spent letting the ponies around him make his decisions for him, and most of those decisions were made by the pony he trusted more than any in the world, Twilight Sparkle. She had proven herself capable time and time again. He’d trust her to lead him anywhere, even into the depths of King Sombra’s fortress when it came down to it.

Life at the castle with Princess Celestia wasn’t anything like that, though. In fact she would usually only give him vague hints of a direction he should follow, or sometimes ignore his problems completely, expecting him to sort it all out by himself! That was a lot of pressure on a little hatchling. Comparatively, Twilight never forced him to guess at anything. She either had an answer for him immediately, or would help him search one out whenever a problem arose. In turn he’d help her research the answers to her own. It was a pretty great team up as far as he was concerned, but now he found himself apart of another team. A team that often sought his advice and was now even depending upon him to do right thing at the right time.

Pouring the fries into a pan after the stove was appropriately heated, he slid them inside to cook. He snatched the patties he had molded with experienced claws as his mind wandered, and tossed them into a frying pan that he placed on the burner. The meal was well on the way. He watched the food cook without really seeing it.

Was a hero even appropriate for him? How much would he have to give up to take on that life? He didn’t want to ever leave Twilight behind, he wanted to continue to play a huge part in her life like he always did, and to be there for her like she always was for him. He wanted to be there for Rarity too, though. His relationship with her seemed like it was picking up, finally! Was he supposed to give that up as well? From what he read, heroes normally lead a very solitary life on the road and in the sky, travelling the world looking for danger and adventure. Meanwhile Twilight’s heart was forever tied to Ponyville, and Rarity’s to Canterlot.

“Spike? Is everything okay?” Twilight asked from the doorway, worry fresh in her tone.

“Wha-?” her sudden intrusion on his thoughts caught him off balance sending him stumbling backwards and the frying pan flying into the air! With a loud thump he landed hard on his rump shaking the whole tree. The pan slammed into his face immediately after, sticking itself to his forehead with a comical sizzle and whisp of smoke. He sat up and turned his pan covered face in her general direction.

“I’m just peachy.” He said, sarcasm dripping from each word.

“Let me help you with that.” She giggled at his predicament, taking the frying pan handle in her teeth and tugging hard until it came off with a pop! The veggie burger patties still sizzled where his eyes should be. A flash of agile tongue removed them quickly, pulling them both into his mouth at the same time, and he smiled, commending himself slightly for a well cooked, if ruined, meal. Eating, it makes everything better.

“Sorry, I’ll put a couple more on right away.” He got up and fished more patties out of the freezer and set about molding them again. He was stopped part way through as he hurried to catch up to where the meal was, Twilight’s hoof against his side.

“Nevermind that for now, are you alright?”

“I’m fine, Twilight.” He shrugged her question off with wide grin, “Scalding hot frying pans got nothing on dragon scales.”

“That wasn’t what I was talking about. You looked troubled about something when I came in, is there anything wrong?”

“Oh no, nothing like that, just... you know... cutting onions.” He gestured towards the condiments on the table, some of the onions had already been cut from previously made meals.

“Onions can make ponies cry, Spike, they don’t make them sad. Your tail and frills were drooping when I came in. Now talk to me.”

It wasn’t a request this time he noted, her stubborn tenacity born from years of effort in her friendship studies was making itself known as it so often did. There would be no escape without a very convincing lie, and he had no time to come up with a cunning enough deception to fool the likes of Twilight Sparkle.

“It’s just... everything lately.” He began, sitting down at the table. “The Fledgling Flier Competition, Rarity leaving, the training, Scootaloo and Dash counting on me, just... everything. It all got so complicated so fast!”

“Does any of this have to do with your old scribbles you left all over your room floor?” Twilight pulled over a chair and sat down beside him.

“Oh come on Twilight!” He promptly slapped his palm against his forehead. “Aren’t I entitled to some privacy?”

“You are my first major study project, my number one assistant, my coolest little brother, and my closest and oldest friend. So in a word? No. No you’re not. I will invade your privacy every chance I get.” She grinned, not even the slightest bit sorry. “I want to know how you’re doing, Spike, and you like to hide the most important things that bother you. I don’t want to miss out on any of them, so you’ll either have to get better at sharing things with me on your own, or you’ll never have even a shred of privacy from me.”

“I’m your only little brother.” He muttered, only half as upset as he probably should have been after hearing that. They’d always shared everything anyway, even the same room until he got too large for hers.

“Further proof of my point.” She cheered inwardly at her victory, knowing well the signs of her brother’s defeat. “Now, what is with all those pictures upstairs?”

“They’re my dream.” He blushed and shuffled awkwardly in his seat. “Rarity brought them back from the castle saying that her and the Princess think I should look into hero training.”

“Ugh.” Twilight rested her elbows on the table and covered her eyes with her hooves. “There’s no such thing as hero training, Spike! How many times have we been over this? It’s been years already, I thought we put all that behind us!”

“We did! I mean, I thought I did, but there is actually a kind of hero training out there, Twilight, in a way. Firefighters, rescue ponies, police, and guards... They don’t wear a cape, but they’re out there helping ponies, that’s all kinda what a hero does, right? Rarity thought if I trained with them I might-”

“You might what? Become some kind of superhero?” Frustration was evident in her tone, and she let her hooves fall down on the table. She was afraid of this. The moment she seen those long forsaken pictures scattered over the floor of his room, she knew it was coming. It was one of the very rare occasions she disagreed with Princess Celestia. And now it was that much worse because Rarity had taken up position on the other side of the debate. It had taken constant work to get Spike’s mind off of his hero obsessions when he was a hatchling, especially with Princess Celestia encouraging him every step of the way. It was like her mentor was blind to all the trouble Spike had gotten into in his endeavors to follow his dreams.

Twilight wasn’t as blind to it, though. Not at all. The first time it happened he jumped from the diving board, barely knowing how to swim himself. All in attempt to rescue a pony from the pool before the lifeguard could. It was the first of many troubles his hero worship would cause. The lifeguard ended up needing to save two instead of one that day. She remembered crying so hard at the time, it felt like she’d never be able to stop. The life the little unicorn had helped bring into the world was nearly snuffed out just like that. Then there were the times he tried to fly from high places with lack of wings as an afterthought, or learning about dangerous areas around the castle and testing his courage by invading them. All his self-imposed and unsupervised training more often than not left him swollen, injured badly, and sometimes bloody and broken and calling for help. It was her who was always the one to find him like that, not her mentor. It was little Twilight Sparkle who would cry herself to sleep worried about what new injury her charge had incurred, or would incur the next day.

It took years of persuasion to get him to stop, finally managing to convince her little brother to look at his role of being her ‘number one assistant’ as being her hero. After all, heroes were all about helping others, so to be one, all he had to do was to help her as best he could. She had been patting herself on the back for that perfect, little argument for a long time. Once she managed to fully explain the thought to him, the two were nearly inseparable. It was only after that she could finally count on him not to put himself in danger when she wasn’t around. And now? Now it was all threatening to begin again. She trembled a little at the thought, a thought that scared her more than any of her own adventures ever could.

“It’s not the same as before, you know?” He said quietly, hoping to allay her fears. “I’m a lot stronger now, I can fly, I’m better with my flame, and thanks to you, I’m a lot smarter about the way I do things.”

“Manticore.” Twilight muttered the single word and Spike swallowed. The mental image of him in bandages and stuck in bed invaded both their minds. The claw marks had disappeared not too much more than a week afterwards, but they were still fresh in Twilight’s imagination, and Spike knew it. He knew the moment she mentioned the creature’s name the brother she was looking at wasn’t the one that might have saved Rarity and Rainbow Dash, or held some kind of victory over the beast. It was the little brother with a broken arm and leg from a long fall. A broken, little hatchling she had rushed to after he tried to prove he could fly even without wings. It wasn’t a tale of rescue that he could be proud of to her, it was just one more time he placed himself in harm’s way and she ended up in tears over him. One among many.

“If it’s any help, Rarity didn’t give me the pictures until after the uh... manticore incident. I didn’t even remember about them until she did.” The words sounded hollow even to him. This time he had turned out okay, but what about next time? Even if he wasn’t afraid of getting hurt, whenever he did, it would be hurting her as well. He turned around, attempting to play off his inability to look her in the eye as the need to pay attention to the burgers before they burned. “I wasn’t trying to be a hero, I was just trying to protect my friends. I thought I was doing what you and the Princess would do.”

Twilight chewed her lip silently as she stared at his back. What she would do? She couldn’t deny the accusation of hypocrisy, even if it wasn’t meant to be one. How many times had he watched her risk herself for everypony else? Nightmare Moon, Discord, Queen Chrysalis, and even King Sombra? She could go on. She could say that it was different, that she never came home hurt from any of those adventures. The truth was if she failed even slightly during those events she wouldn’t have had the chance to come home at all!

More to the point, she was the one who gave permission to Rarity to take him into the Everfree Forest to begin with. She thought he was capable of handling himself, and then he proved he was. So why was she so dead set against this? Why was it that this path was the last one she ever wanted to see him travel? Guards, rescue workers, firefighters? They were all very noble careers, each deserving an immense amount of respect, but why did it have to be her brother taking the risks that they would take? How many times would he get himself hurt doing that? How many times could he continue to take the risks before the odds ended up against him? She already worried enough with one brother as a guard, let alone both!

How many lives could he save?

Twilight didn’t want to ask the question; didn’t want to compare those statistics in her head. What if he saved everypony in Equestria and lost himself in the trade? Would it be worth it? It was such a selfish question the stubborn scholar couldn’t even tolerate it. She didn’t want to think about it at all, but it was also the only thought her mind would currently allow through. Standing up and made her way towards the next room, deciding to let him get back to cooking without distraction. On her way out the distraught unicorn heard him stutter an attempt at spoken word. She paused and looked over at him. He was a little too interested in the patties as he flipped them. She waited as he tried to find his voice again.

“Would you mind... waiting? In here? Just until supper’s ready?”

“Huh?” The question caught her off guard, and she turned completely around to face him.

“I just... I’d like you to stay for a bit. I guess... well, I kinda miss you, like this, just eating supper and stuff.”

“Oh Spike,” Her heart reached out to him, and her forelegs followed suit, walking over to wrap him up in a hug. “I’ve missed you too.”

As soon as the words came out, she understood how true they were. Of course she had known it all along, but it felt good saying it out loud. Her number one assistant who was always there for her, supporting her, lending her fresh ideas and perspective, and sharing the workload. With Snails and Fluttershy around to work with, his absence hadn’t been hitting her as hard anymore, not until right at that moment.

“I’ve missed you so much.” She added, giving a second tight squeeze before letting him go. “You’re right, we don’t get together enough anymore to waste it over secret pictures and plans. I barely get to see you or Rainbow Dash at all. I know you two are both working really hard for this flight show of yours, but I really can’t wait til it’s over just so I can see two of my best friends again.”

“I know. I feel like a stranger here, like I’ve lost touch with everything. I don’t know anything anymore. I have no idea why Snails is here, where you go in the morning, what you were doing all day that made you so tired, what is in all those letters you make me send to Rarity, or anything. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.”

“It’s okay Spike,” she patted his back, “sometimes life takes the reigns from us every now and then, but that doesn’t mean there’s nothing we can do about it. How about I call Snails in here, and we spend the whole evening catching up with each other? One night off together won’t throw off your training routine will it?”

“No that... that actually sounds really nice.” This time the smile he gave her was a genuine one. Probably the first true one he used all night.

******

A light blue aura surrounded the sign in the door window before the magic flipped it over. At long last the store was closed, and the grand opening of Canterlot’s Carousel Boutique was completed. The business Rarity had garnered over the last two weeks of sales, crowds, and new contacts had already drummed up substantially more than her little shop back in Ponyville. Her efforts were instantly recognized, especially with the royal seal of approval on display from Princess Cadence’s wedding gown and Prince Shining Armour’s tuxedo. For weeks before the opening she’d paid for the distribution of pamphlets, and advertised on posters all over the city. She called every contact she could remember, suggesting they drop by and bring a friend or two. To her surprise all of the princesses had shown up at some point, and the news spread like wildfire.

“An early start to this years Grand Galloping Gala.” Celestia told the press, with a wink to Rarity. The fashionista nearly swooned then and there. Her first impression ended with an amazing success, so much so in fact, she had to call in help to finish all the custom orders and requests. Her boutique was already known all over the city as the place for any and all true upper fashion needs. She even had to raise her prices for custom orders more than ten times than what she had charged in Ponyville, not because of more work or expensive materials, but purely for time. She needed a way to discourage ponies from asking before she over-scheduled herself. She was very pleased wth it all, and very, very tired. There would be no work on fashion tonight, not for her anyway. Only some time for a well-deserved break, and perhaps some brainstorming for what she considered her most important of projects that had come her way.

She smiled, excitedly trotting up the stairs to her inspiration room. There hung a large red and gold banner from one side of the very large room to the other. She walked past the marvel of expensive material without sparing it a glance, instead going straight to her sketchbook which was lying open on it’s own extravagant pedestal. Throughout the last several pages the word ‘Crusaders’ had been marked down a hundred times in a hundred different ways. Some of them were very stylish and flowing script, others were large and bold, blocky letters like you would see chiseled on ancient stone, still more had their letters stylized to resemble pictures within the word. She looked over them all before letting her magic slam the book closed in frustration.

It wasn’t her work that troubled her. In truth almost any single one of the designs would catch the attention of the ponies at the Fledgling Flier Competition, which was all that Rainbow Dash had wanted. It was the name itself she struggled with. ‘Captain Dash and The Crusaders’.

“It just doesn’t seem fair, does it Darling?” She posed the question to her cat who had tangled itself up, ruining yet another ball of Rarity’s yarn. The unicorn paid the destruction no heed. “Of course Rainbow Dash has to her have her name out in front, it will be her reputation that everypony will be coming to see. ‘The Crusaders’ isn’t a terrible name either, I suppose, and I’m certain it means ever so much to little Scootaloo. It just makes it seem like he has no part in it.”

She sat down heavily in a very extravagant, cushy chair that stood exaggeratedly tall, while overlooking the scattering of fashion materials and tools that surrounded her. Resembling a throne it sat perfectly centered in the middle of the room, where it could keep careful watch over her subjects, these tools and cloths that obeyed her every magically influenced whim. Only one of those many subjects had her attention currently; her ever-present cat, Opalescence, found herself levitating towards Rarity’s lap. The sensation of being wrapped in magic was one the feline was well used to. She ignored it for the strands of yarn that shifted with her, continuing to swat at them as they moved through the air. Rarity slowly picked the strands out of her beloved little kitten’s fur even as Opalescence continued to play. Idly teasing her cat with the loose hanging strings, she attempted to organize her thoughts about why the banner design bothered her as much as it did.

“How long has it been now?” She asked the feisty pet, “Five, perhaps six years?”

She could barely remember him waddling after Twilight Sparkle the first time they met. Of course, who could blame her? Twilight’s mane was in a such a disastrous state that she had never seen the like before, or since! Who could possibly notice her strange lizard pet following her around with that disfigurement obstructing their vision? She was used to friends having reptiles as pets anyway. Pinkie Pie would take any chance she could get to show off Gummy, Rarity simply assumed it was just some better trained alligator or something of the sort.

“How wrong could I possibly be?” She leaned her head back against the chair and smiled at the memory. Her mind turned to the week after, and that whole gala ticket debacle. It was the first design she ever made for a dragon. She thought it was adorable, he was less than enthused.

“Well, of course he was, Darling,” She explained to her cat playfully, “it was a suit designed for little colts, and the wig was probably a tad bit too far.”

A dragon with a mane, what was she thinking? Well Aquas had pulled it off well, so she assumed Spike could too, and perhaps he could. The difference being that he certainly wouldn’t want to. He’d chosen the afternoon rainstorm and isolation at the library over spending even another moment in her boutique that day. She ran her hoof through Opalescence smooth fur coat as the yarn fell away with each brush.

“He came back, though, no matter what I put him through, he always came back.” Pins in his scales, having him do all the dirty work with gem digging, why she had even put him in danger of being stolen by those dreadful diamond dogs! He hadn’t thought of it as her fault, but it was obviously so. She should have been more careful. She could take care of herself, but Spike was just a baby dragon! She admonished herself for it time and again, meanwhile he had never even noticed, instead only thinking about her welfare throughout the entire affair.

“It’s always been that way with him, hasn’t it? Lending his assistance without qualm or regret no matter what may come? An unspoken and unquestionable devotion to us and our goals.” She continued to think out loud. “And even after we called him the hero, the crystal ponies only celebrated Princess Cadence’s success. They completely ignored him.”

Letting out a small hmph there was a fresh taste of disdain left in her mouth towards the kingdom she helped to save. The whole celebration felt like a sham, as if Spike hadn’t risked as much or more than anypony else. It wasn’t as if he had any tests to pass for royalty, and certainly nopony would think less of a little dragon that decided to play it safe at home, or in the confines of the town. He just wanted to help Twilight Sparkle, and his dedication to her ended up being the key to saving the kingdom and everypony in it. The picture of his triumph was now imprinted in the stained glass windows of Canterlot Castle, something Princess Celestia had seen to immediately. In the Crystal Kingdom, though, there were no parades in his honour, no celebration of the part Spike played. She stared silently at the banner. Would he end off being left out again?

A knock on her front door below interrupted her straying thoughts. She set Opalescence back to her place on the floor, and peaked out the balcony window. A young, blue-ish furred unicorn stood outside, fidgeting as he waited.

“Oh! Snips! How could I have forgotten?” It must have slipped her mind, she arranged a train ticket for her assistant earlier to help with the unforeseeable amount of work the day had garnered. She felt the need to congratulate herself again for her ability to pick him out when she did. Another diamond she found in the rough. There was much to teach him, but given the right advice, the chance was there. He had a perception all his own when it came to clothing designs, a talent for seeing patterns in cloth, and how to use it. There could be little doubt in his ability as far as she was concerned, the real challenge was convincing him of it. He was brimming with confidence issues, his portly appearance and prior adventures in their little town had seen to that. Canterlot would be good for him when she felt he was ready. The young stallion could begin with a clean slate, away from all the negativity that followed him around back in Ponyville.

“Snips! Oh Snips! Up here, Darling!” She called while stepping out onto the balcony, waving to the unicorn, utterly oblivious to the world around him as he waited awkwardly on the Boutique’s steps. Taking a moment to trace her magic over the lock on the door, she switched it over to grant her protègè entrance. “You’ve arrived so late, I wasn’t sure if you were coming!”

“Sorry Ms. Rarity! The train had engine trouble!” He called up in reply. “How was the opening?”

“It was magnificent! But do come in Dear, lets not keep shouting to each other like this. I’ll tell you all about it once you’re inside.

And that she did, from the moment he met her by the stairs, for hours talk continued on about every little detail. To his credit, Snips managed to retain his attention for longer than usual before it drifted off to the contents of the newly furnished Boutique. He hadn’t been here before, and he was unfamiliar with the place as a whole. He regretted saying anything about it, as it turned out Rarity was happy to rectify that, gladly giving him a tour of her new abode. It seemed like she had a story behind every decision. By the time they were finished her show and tell, he had heard about every tiny detail of gossip she had managed to pick up, as well all the major and minor events of the day. Most of which was set aside into a category of his mind filled with misshapen facts that would be lost into obscurity in the next few minutes.

His mind wandered as she continued talk his ear off about the most irrelevant, to him at least, details of the opening. They ended the tour in her inspiration room, probably because Rarity did, at some point, want to talk about the designs and patterns she’d want him to get to work on back in Ponyville. The large banner caught his eye, as well as a set of ponakins clothed in vibrant dresses and accessories, and a book left open with her thoughts on scripts. He took it all in, far more interested in getting this over with. There was still another late train to Ponyville he’d have to catch, and tired was not nearly enough to describe how he felt. Then he spotted something familiar. Over in the corner there was a set of clothing supplies he was surprised to see with the rest of Rarity’s latest designs. Without thinking, he trotted over to them and stared.

The absence of her audience was something Rarity always noticed, but she smiled inwardly as she took note of what had caught his attention. Wrapping the clothing in question in magic, she held the styles up, putting them on display for them both.

“They really are well done. I was quite proud of you when I first saw them.”

“A-are they selling?” He asked nervously. They were the first line he had ever created on his own. Never really sure about getting into the fashion design business, Snips was content to put his natural talent to use behind closed doors in the Carousel Boutique. His boss would hear nothing of the sort, however, instead insisting that he work as a sales rep at the counter, and that he begin to work on his own ideas. The intent was obvious, she expected him to showcase something. He tried a few styles of dresses, but they always came out dull-looking, and no pony in their right mind would buy them. Surrounded in a store of the most beautiful and amazing of wardrobes, and working for a fashionista of exquisite taste and design, any amateurish attempts of his own fell laughably below standard. If it wasn’t bad enough he was trying to make dresses, he had become the laughing stock of his peers, not that he wasn’t already used to that from his school years.

He finally found a way to sell one of his own designs by making a section that was completely separate from the rest of the shop, a small corner with a rack filled with shirt and pant styles he’d like to wear. Rarity was somewhat put off by the new display in the store at first, but it must have grown on her, because she would constantly say how proud she was of him. Of course she also said the same of Sweetie Belle’s attempt at cooking. It was often hard to read whether Rarity was just trying to be encouraging, or if she really did enjoy the whatever it was you were presenting her with.

“Here? I’m afraid not so much.” There was no hint of disappointment in the tone of her answer, but it made him feel sick inside. He put so much work into the line, she even set aside a place for it here in her pride and joy in the heart of Canterlot. It was encouraging to see it downstairs, but apparently it hadn’t hardly been touched. He had hoped to actually be able to go back to Ponyville with something to boast about, some amount of pride.

“I guess... you should probably take the display down.”

“Yes.” Rarity nodded, putting a hoof to her chin, “It does seem a bit too drab to keep here. Well, not to worry, everything else is doing perfectly swimmingly!”

“Yeah, great.” Snips tried to keep the flat tone from his voice, this was his boss after all, but element of generosity or not, she had a tendency to either miss the troubles of other ponies around her. This wasn’t one of those times, however. She picked up on his disappointment quickly.

“Oh Darling, don’t get so down about it, I didn’t really expect your designs to sell in Canterlot anyway.”

“Yeah, that makes me feel a whole lot better.” He rolled his eyes, and turned from the line sitting pointedly in the opposite direction.

“Perhaps I should have worded that better,” fixing his back with a glare, her own tone changed, “but really, did you expect to outsell me everywhere we go?”

“Huh?” Snips paused, turning back towards her as she magically folded up his designs and placed them neatly back in the piles where he’d seen them. “What do you mean?”

“I mean my designs, of course! You silly, little thing. You outsell me in Ponyville every month! I would hope that at least in Canterlot my lines would finally overcome yours.”

“M-mine outsell yours?”

“Well of course they do! How long have you been working the counter, and you’ve never noticed? Come here, let me fetch my ledger.” Moving to her throne, Rarity sat down comfortably before levitating her book of the past years sales into her hooves. The pages flipped quickly by through use of her spell as Snips stared over her shoulder.

“Here now, you see?” She paused at a point in the book when his line first started selling. “Your little section outsells the rest of the Boutique every single day!”

“Well, yeah, but ponies only come in to get little things like t-shirts, and overalls, and stuff. Maybe I sell the odd hiking boot here and there. It’s all so cheap that if even one dress gets sold in a month and the shop makes more off it than all of my stock put together. I might sell more stuff, but it’s your designs that make the money.”

“Snips! I’m surprised at you! Your first line is selling, and you’re utterly unaware of how important that is! I wish I sold even one of my first two sets of designs, it was the third before some pony bought something that wasn’t just out of charity. Profit is no way to judge how you’re doing, it’s necessary for a business to be sure, but what’s most important are the ponies who wish to wear what you made. I’ve been trying to outsell you for months, but no matter how I tried Ponyville just wasn’t suitable to my clientele. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised, Canterlot has always been where I truly belonged. As much as I dearly love Ponyville, the residents there simply have no vision for art in their clothing. They would instead prefer something a little more durable and easy to run in, I suppose. I must admit some envy over how well you’ve done there.”

“So, I am doing good?” He flipped through some of the pages himself, Rarity allowed him to take the book completely for him to browse through.

“See for yourself. My failure is all there in black and white. Truly disheartening for me, I assure you.”

“It’s amazing... I didn’t even know, but then why don’t they sell okay here?”

“It’s like I was saying, Darling, it’s all about clientele. Canterlot ponies are all about being upper class, as close to being royalty as they can be. Why, look at Sweet Apple Acres, the Apple family has no trouble selling their pastries and pies in Ponyville, but when she went to the gala, she had hardly sold anything at all. It’s all about knowing what your customers want.”

“So, since my designs are more casual wear, they’d sell better in towns where ponies are more casual, like apple pies?”

“Precisel-” Rarity’s voice caught in her throat, her eyes suddenly widened as she froze up in shock. Numbers on papers blurred through her mind, train carts filled with apples, and then the fateful image of the lonely looking apple stand outside the gala. The business pony bolted to her bedroom where she tossed the pile of Twilight’s letters into the air, leaving them suspended there caught in her magic, as she browsed through them.

“This is it.... This is what the problem is!”

“What problem? What’s going on?!” Snips hesitated at the doorway to her bedroom, nervous about following all the way in.

“The answer to Sweet Apple Acre’s problems!”

“Sweet Apple Acres has problems?” Snips tilted his head curiously.

“No.” Rarity turned with a flourish, offering him a wide smile. “Not anymore.”

“I- uh, think I missed something...”

“No time to explain! Princess Cadence is possibly still in town, Snips! We must meet her at once! Quickly, borrow one of the suits on display. Why is there never any time when you need it most?!

******

As evening fell, the day's flight training was over, and every muscle in her back stung with strain and protested the constant extra bounce in her each and every step. No amount of strain or tiredness could hold down this pegasus, though, not now, not with the newly formed image her flank displayed. Waking up after her ordeal had brought with it a change in her life, the likes of which was beyond what word could tell. Scootaloo was happy; totally, completely, and indisputably happy. In fact, she was happier than she could ever remember being before! Her parents had celebrated with her right through the night, just as proud of her as they could ever be. It was an amazing feeling, a feeling of accomplishment, of success, of belonging. She was now a full fledged pony by anypony's standard.

Her wings were far too tired to make any attempt at flying, but her heart was soaring higher than her wings could ever take her, and she happily trotted through town. Her flank, purposefully held up high, so the cutie mark would be impossible to go unnoticed, and what a cutie mark it was! A skyboard ramping along a cloud that was shaped in an arch, and a delighted additional hop entered her step as she thought about it. The fear that had held her back was gone now, she truly was made for the sky! No longer was she some strangely grounded pegasus that would never step on a cloud, but one who was meant to ride the wind like none ever had before her! Praise and congratulations were on the lips of everypony she passed. Their adoration only swelled her heart and head further. Could the day get any better?

"-and then Daddy took them for all they were worth! He told me he's going to sell their stock for at least triple the cost, that'll teach those Canterlot ponies to mess with our family."

And then it did. Catching sight of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon who were walking down the street, Scootaloo beamed as she listened to Tiara's latest story about one of her father's latest deals. Apparently Filthy Rich had gotten the better of some big business Canterlot type that wasn't used to dealing with the business end of a Ponyville pony. Scootaloo grinned, she never thought there would ever be a time she'd want to run across Diamond Tiara , but now it was just too perfect.

"Serves every one of them right! You know they consider us 'hicks'? Us? Hicks? Can you imagine? I heard them whispering about us at the last Gala! I've never been so insulted!" The dramatic grimace on Silver Spoon's face and the rising heat in her cheeks spoke of an anger that boiled beneath her skin at the slight.

"Let them think whatever they want." Her friend offered a devious grin in reply, "the more they underestimate us, the easier it is to pull the wool over their eyes. Daddy says it all the time, ponies with their noses stuck in the air won't see it when you swipe their business out from under them."

"Then you two better look for a new line of work, I've never seen your noses pointed any other way." The two friends turned to look at the offending interruption. Scootaloo was grinning like the cat that ate the canary.

"It only seems that way, I'm sure." Tiara smiled wickedly, "Our noses are always pointed away from you because we're trying to avoid the stench."

Glaring daggers at Diamond Tiara, the fiery pegasus searched her mind for a retort, but simply wasn't quick enough. Why did her rival have to have such a sharp wit?

"Besides, I’m not underestimating you at all! I'm banking on how profitable our latest wager is going to be for me. You know, we should really try to be more friendly towards one another," sarcasm leaked into every word, "after all, you're going to be working for me for such a long time, and Daddy says it's good business to show manners to your employees."

"Even her? That's going to take some getting used to." Silver Spoon snorted and the friends erupted in laughter.

"Daddy says this, Daddy says that." Scootaloo tried her best whiny impersonation of the frustratingly witty young mare in front of her that had made it a point to make her school days as long as possible. It sounded funnier in her head she noticed, "Can't you say anything for yourself?"

There was a returned glare even if only for a moment before the prissy pony closed her eyes and sniffed haughtily. The facade had dropped, if only for a second, Scootaloo had managed to crack the wall that was her rival's pride. She had finally struck a nerve.

"It's ponies like you that give us a bad name in Canterlot. If Ponies in this little, nowhere town bothered to listen to Daddy, my family could actually make something of this place. But certain ungrateful and uneducated misfits who have no sense of responsibility or pride in Ponyville bring our reputation down with every breath of air they breath! Why, if it wasn't for my daddy this town wouldn't be able to run for more than a couple months! And it’s all mostly because of miserable lay-abouts and blank flanks that don’t contribute!"

"Aah!" Silver Spoon gasped, pointing to the pegasus' flank, "What is that?"

Scootaloo smiled widely, standing somewhat sideways and presenting her newly won cutie mark for the world to see. This was what she was waiting for, the trademark 'blank flank' crack that Diamond Tiara would be tossing at her sooner or later.

"Could it be? Have you finally figured out something you're good at?" Tiara squinted, trying to make out the picture. "It's about time, it only took what? 6 years more than everypony else? What does it even mean?"

"That, is a 'Skyboard', and it's what's going to win our team the Fledgling Flier Competition this year! I've got a talent like nothing nopony's ever seen before, and it's purely about crazy stunts I can pull off while flying.” Gleeful pride filled shined behind every word. “I hope your getting hungry, cause you're gonna have to eat every word you ever said about me! We're not coming back without that trophy!"

"Oh, I'm so worried." Rolling her eyes, she nudged Silver Spoon, "You’ve managed to find a flying-related Cutie Mark. Of course I’m sure you’re going to be the only pegasus with one there, and like, it’s not like any of the others have had theirs for years of practice already.” Nervousness trickled around the edges of Scootaloo’s normally confident exterior. Diamond Tiara wasn’t wrong, every pony had way more practice time in the air to perfect their own stunts than she would, and she was still shaky on her gliding technique. The contemptuous earth pony must have somehow smelled the weakness, and as always she kicked for the sore spot. “Face it, you lost this bet before it was even out of your mouth! Compared to all the other competitors, your ‘sky board’ act will end up looking like another clown show, if you even manage to qualify.”

“Qualify?! We’ve got a dragon on our team, and the Rainbow Dash! You might remember her, she’s only the got the Best Young Flier trophy on her wall? We’re going to blow the competition away!”

“I suppose that’s true, with a team-up like that they’ll get past the qualifiers if only because they’ll be able to sell out.” Pushing up her glasses, Silver Spoon contemplated what that meant for the wager. Diamond Tiara was always so sure about everything it was hard to question her, and in this case she agreed completely when her friend first made this gamble. Scootaloo was in no place to make that promise, and it was her own opinion that Tiara had let the obstinate, little pegasus get away with too much over the years without paying her debts. Then things went overboard.

Over the last few months Diamond Tiara had changed her passive aggressive stance when it came to the town’s oldest blank flank. It seemed almost a sure thing that she would win the bet, and her friend started making investments towards that end! Scootaloo would be her very first employee, and she planned to have a job for her to come back to.Taking a lenient loan from her father, she began putting her entrepreneur business together. Months of checking expenses, down payments, and piecing together business plans, with her father’s advice, Diamond Tiara had become nearly obsessive about making it all come together.

And now, of all times, Scootaloo finally starts rising to the challenge? Silver Spoon began to worry. What if the famous stunt pony and dragon stole the games for Scootaloo? What if that new Cutie Mark spelled the victory? What if Diamond Tiara lost?

“Isn’t that just like you? Always depending on your friends to pull your weight. Well it won’t work this time, they might even be your downfall. Have you ever heard of a dragon in the competitions? Do you even know if Spike would be allowed to compete?”

“Rainbow Dash says they probably haven’t made any rules against it because no dragon’s ever tried.” It wasn’t easy to bite back the retort over the ‘not holding her own’ crack, but her coach had warned her not to rise to anymore baiting after she learned about the bet. She swore not to go too far with ‘Daddy’s spoiled little filly’.

“Then he’s just as likely not allowed as he will be allowed, they’ll have to judge it one way or the other! And then there’s Rainbow Dash. Of course if she gets to compete she’ll probably steal the show, but that’s a really big ‘if’. Hasn’t she ever told you ‘why’ she never won the Fledgling Flier’s competition?”

“W-what are you talking about?”

“Oh, you know, that whole flight school complication? That kind of thing doesn’t just go away.”

“Are you talking bad about my Captain?!” Red flashed before her eyes and before she knew it the prissy earth pony was being held up by the scruff of her neck, her own breath was shaking in her anger, her other hoof raised threateningly, reason only just managing to give her pause. How far had Rainbow Dash gone for them? She was always there spending day and night beside them, training them, pushing them to be their best, even going as far as to discard her career just for her team. How far would Scootaloo have gotten without her help? She knew she was going nowhere without her coach, and hearing this pony, of all ponies, speak ill of her? It went too far. That cunning smile was still clinging to her face; that frustrating, taunting, know-it-all smile that Scootaloo failed to wipe off her face time and time again.

“So you really don’t know? Well it’d be rude of me to say anything more; you should go ask her about it yourself.”

“It’s rude of you to open your mouth at all.” The withering glare she tried failed to achieve any effect on the pony she held in her grip. She let the ‘royal-pain-in-her-flank’ go and instinctively looked towards the clouds in the distance where Rainbow Dash made her home.

Dusting herself off slightly, an insulting gesture suggesting that just being in contact with the ruffian was distasteful, and debasing to a degree, Diamond Tiara gave Scootaloo’s back a wicked sneer. She knew all too well about Rainbow Dash’s past. She had followed Scootaloo’s progress, and checked up on everything she did and who she contacted. Everything about the bet was already in her favour, she didn’t have to lift a hoof, not that she would have done so. Her father was against bribing, he felt it beneath the family name and, as a rule, there were far better ways to get what you wanted without spending the very money you were trying to earn to do so; for instance, learning every aspect about any wager you make. Besides, no amount of bribe money would make the odds any worse than they already were for this flight team.

“If you don’t believe me, just go and ask her yourself.” She snickered, sometimes it was all too easy to pick on the distraught pegasus. At the same time there was nothing sweeter than seeing a plan come to fruition, and watching her long time victim get put back into her place. Still, there was a new Cutie Mark in town to consider, one that would very likely be put under her employ. Her plans needed to be adjusted accordingly to the new information. Soon she would have this filly wrapped around her hoof, and the advantages of that were staggering to behold. No matter what she told Scootaloo, the truth was the pegasus was overflowing with potential.

“You sure showed her!” Silver Spoon denounced the retreating figure, “Trying to brag about something as silly as a Cutie Mark? How immature can you even get? I don’t know what you see in her, she’ll probably always be useless.”

“Silver, sometimes you tend to think so small.” Once again she had to question her own taste in best friends; hers often had trouble seeing the big picture. There was nopony more loyal though, and loyalty was a trait she treasured. Then again, not everypony could be as calculating as herself, now could they? Supposing she couldn’t hold that against her, Diamond Tiara began to explain. “Having her in my debt will give me many tools to work with. Don’t you see? The more friends she makes, the more ponies I have sway over. The more ponies they’re friends with, the more ponies I have some amount of leverage with. Even if she was worthless she has managed to get in good with the sisters of some very important ponies. A hoof hold with the Elements of Harmony? Yes please! And I’m sure don’t need to mention who the Elements of Harmony are friends with.”

“The Princesses!” The silver pony gasped, putting her hoof to her head as the realization became clear. Diamond Tiara confirmed her friend’s outburst with a confident smile.

“Exactly, talent or not, Scootaloo was never going to be useless to me. Now, with each improvement she makes of herself, the better employee I get! She can fly now, and that has some amount of usefulness on its own. The Cutie Mark she has earned herself has never been seen before! That makes it rare, and anything rare is worth bits to the right buyer.” She grinned wryly towards the empty street where topic of their conversation had disappeared into the distance. “Where you see worthless, I see an unending amount of opportunity.”

******

The early autumn sun was sinking behind the mountains on the far side of Ponyville. Streaks of red and orange light fell between lengthening shadows that traced their way across the land. Normally, that’s where she’d be right now; enjoying the light show from the best seat in the world, the one her wings allowed her. There’d be no evening flight for her though, this night like the past several weeks, Rainbow Dash would have to spend with her muzzle stuck in a book. No, not a book, a whole bunch of books. Some of the pages she’d been perusing weren’t even books yet, they were just notes for a book still to be completed! How egg-headish was that?!

The annoyed national hero rolled her eyes at the bookwork that was scattered across her room and wondered again if all this was a good idea. A weather pony didn’t offer the same excitement and esteem or the fame and glory that being a Wonderbolt would hold, but at least she never had to bother with all this reading before.

“Little late to think about that now.” She shook her head and reached over for another competition rule book. She’d been through everything Twilight could dig out and so far, so good. Nothing about dragons not joining, in fact, and the more she thought about it, the more promising it looked for Spike. Gilda, her old griffon friend, was on her team way back when. That meant it ‘was’ a cross-species competition, which was a huge load off her mind when it first came to mind. Unfortunately the rule books were pretty vague on the allowed competitors, there was a lot of wiggle room if, for some reason or another, the judges saw fit to toss out an application.

“How many rule books do they need for one competition anyway?” She skimmed through it quickly before tossing it onto a growing pile on her nightstand. Nothing about entries, and just more rules about qualification formations. Another subject of interest to her, but not tonight. She’d worry about the qualifiers once she was sure her team was allowed to join at all. The applications she’d sent out after Rarity’s Farewell party were taking their time in coming back, she could only hope Derpy hadn’t gotten involved again.

“Wait, isn’t she working the weather team again now that I’m gone?” Wondering idly what pony Mayor Mare replaced her with, she took a moment to sort her own notes about the areas the team needed to work on from Twilight’s dragon flight studies. It was strange not to think about the weather anymore, after all, her life used to revolve around that career path. Thoughts swirled towards her weather team. How were they coping without her? Were they even missing her? She hadn’t heard anything from them in quite some time, though it wasn’t strange that none had come to visit. Outside of her work with the weather her time was mostly spent practicing stunts, napping, or hanging out with the rest of her friends

“Well, they were already so perfect it was boring, whoever took that job will have a nice and cushy time of it.” Still, the breeze that drifted through the room left her ear twitching. There was something odd on the wind; something she wasn’t familiar with. Unfamiliar winds was never good news when it came to the weather around Ponyville. Their village sat too close to the Everfree, unlike the rest of Equestria, there was still some of the wild left in the weather in these parts.

This kind of thing used to excite her, but it might really throw whoever took lead now. She’d need to drop by the weather station tonight to make sure-

Then a loud, angry pounding smashed against her front door, Rainbow Dash nearly jumped right out of her fur! She couldn’t remember the last time there was a knock at her door, the idea was so foreign to her that the sound repeated itself twice more before it even occurred to her to answer. She quickly trotted into the living room before calling out.

“C-come on in! It’s open!”

The door slammed open and there stood Scootaloo, with a fire in her eyes Dash wasn’t used to seeing in her fledgling outside of practice.

“Is it true?!”

“Uh.... what?”

“Is what Diamond Tiara said true?” Scootaloo stomped into the room until she was face to face with her mentor. “Is there some pony going to try to stop us from entering Fledgling Flier’s Competition?”

“She uh... knew about that, huh?” There was no keeping the awkward smile from spreading across her face, and she scratched the back of her head nervously. “I guess I couldn’t keep it from you guys forever. That snoopy school friend of yours isn’t lying.”

“Were you planning on telling us at all? What if we can’t qualify, Captain? Who is it? Is there anything we can do?!” There was a panic in the worried fledgling’s tone that she couldn’t hide behind the anger that tried to take it’s place.

“Woah woah woah, one question at a time, Squirt.”

“Alright, first question,” the reply came with an indignant scowl, “WHEN were you planning on telling us?! After we got there and were told to go home?!”

“Well, yeah actually, that was kinda the plan.” The sheepish answer did nothing to quell the temper brewing inside Scootaloo.

“Why?! Why would you wait until it’s too late to do anything about it?”

“Because it already is.” Rainbow Dash sighed, moving over to sit by her table and gesturing for the irate pony to follow. “Have a seat Squirt, we’re probably going to be here awhile sorting you out.”

“Sorting me out?! Are you nuts? I’m not the one that needs sorting out, Captain! You’re the one keeping crazy bad secrets from your team! Why would you give us hope when you knew there wasn’t any? How could you do this to us? How could you do this to… to.. me?” Angry tears burned at the edges of her eyes and she looked away, ashamed of not being unable to hold them back. “Was it all just a joke, or some kind of prank to you?”

The slam on the table brought the young pegasus’ attention back to her mentor quickly. She expected some remorse, second guessing, or some form of pleading look from her coach, and she received not a hint of any of it. In their stead was a withering set of piercing eyes that were fixing her with an icy glower.

“Scootaloo, sit down. Now.” It wasn’t said loud, or in a shout, quite the opposite, it was said in a disturbing, quiet way that brooked no argument. Even though the rage still stormed inside her, the sudden fear that it all could end right here if she wasn’t careful grabbed hold of her anger and sat her rump down for her.

“You’re angry, and you have some right to be.” Keeping her voice calm, controlled, stern, quiet, Rainbow Dash wasn’t some wet by the ears brat leading her first couple of recruits. She’d been the lead weather pony for almost the entirety of her life in Ponyville, and she knew how to deal with angry, little amateurs second guessing her orders. Experience granted her authority, and it was something only to be used rarely and carefully. “Fledgling, as entitled as you think you are I want you to understand this. You don’t question my loyalty to my team, ever. Am I being clear?”

A nod was the only reply Scootaloo could muster the courage for.

“Good. Now I want you to answer me. Would I give up my promising career as a weather pony, three months training two of my best friends, spend all my nights reading rule books and science notes, and possibly risk my dream of being a Wonderbolt if I thought for even a second, that nothing would come of it?”

“N-no…?” She swallowed, the anger quickly seeping away.

“No.”

“T-then what about...” Finding her voice had a sudden difficulty to it.

“It’s a concern, yes, but we’ve been through worse. When we first started, two out of three of our team members couldn’t even glide, you were getting vertigo every time you spread your wings, Spike was spending more time swimming than he was flying, and I thought I wouldn’t be able to help either of you. On top of it all we all had to say some hard goodbyes to friends that have been supporting us the whole way through.” The serious tone grew light as Rainbow Dash ran through their various misadventures in her mind. “But look how far we’ve come, Squirt! You not only know how to fly, you have a sense of balance better than any flier I know, and you invented a whole new way of flying with that board of yours! In fact, you’ve got so much control over your Sky Call now, that you even ended up teaching me a couple new tricks in how to handle mine.”

“I did?” Eyes wide with wonder and excitement, the reason she came by falling flat compared to the idea that she had taught the Rainbow Dash something new about flying!

“No word of a lie.” Dash nodded, and stood up to trot over beside her protégé, “I never thought of it as it’s own song before, so I have Fluttershy looking in on all the patterns she can find in mine. You not only made yourself better for it Scoot, You made me better for it too. How awesome is that?”

“Only like the most coolest, most awesomest thing ever!”

“Nah, but it comes close.” Leaning in behind Scootaloo, she wrapped one hoof around her shoulder and stretched her other out before them both, gesturing to her kitchen but painting a different picture with words. “See yourself standing against the exhaustion threatening to take you right off your hooves, still panting, trying to catch your breath, and fur matted with sweat. You’re beside Spike and me listening to a sold out stadium of pegasi chanting our name while we hold a first place trophy over our heads. That, Squirt, would be the most awesome thing ever.”

“That is so going to happen.” Continuing to stare at the imagined scene her coach described, all doubts she had seemed to fall far away.

“Good, you just keep that victory in mind, and let me sweat the small stuff. That’s my job as Team Captain after all.”

“No.” Shaking her head to dispel day dream, Scootaloo looked up to her mentor, “Like you said, we’ve had our friends supporting us the whole way through, but maybe it’s about time we started supporting each other! We’ve been playing our parts as best as we can, but a team’s supposed to be more than that. You helped me and Spike with every problem that came our way, but we haven’t really been helping each other out very much, and neither of us have been helping you!”

“Is that what you think?” Dash stared back in surprise before smiling brightly, “You have no idea how much you two helped me, and I don’t think you realize how much you’ve helped each other. I was trapped in a job that wasn’t going anywhere before you came along with this challenge of yours. Your spirit has been putting me back on a track that I was beginning to lose sight of for awhile. I owe you a lot for that Squirt. And you and Spike would never have made it so far, so fast, if you didn’t push each other to do better every time you’re out there. Helping us out motivates him, watching him get better motivates you. Every wing beat either of you make, you owe the other for. “

“That’s great and all, but it’s only in the sky, Captain! I want to be a team when we’re on our hooves too.”

A frown replaced Dash’s smile, and a thought occurred to her that the young pegasus might have a point. How many years had she been apart of the Ponyville weather ponies, but never spent any real time with them outside of work? Maybe the reason she never had a friend darken her doorstep, was because she never sought out more than just being great at her job?

“Are you sure, Kiddo? My job isn’t exactly as fun as it looks.” heading over to her bedroom door and opening it to reveal the mountains of papers and piles of books, Dash smirked as she heard Scootaloo make an audible ‘gulp’.

“What is all this?” the fledgling tentatively peered into her idol’s room, glancing uncertainly at the array of source material scattered around.

“Well, those books on the bed are all the rule books for all the different races and competitions in Cloudsdale’s history, that bunch of papers half tacked into the wall are the notes I’ve been taking about our formation practice, and the rest of the ones on the dresser are all the science notes Twilight Sparkle lent me for her studies on dragon flight.”

“You’re reading ALL of this?!”

“Somepony’s gotta do it, and I can’t really push it all on Twilight like I normally would. She’s been way too busy lately.”

“And the rules… do they say anything about our qualifications?”

“I haven’t found anything disqualifying us so far. Some weird stuff in them though, like: Did you know there’s actually a rule against wrestling bears as part of stunt show?”

“Wrestling bears?” She paused to look back at her Captain to see if she was yanking her chain. Rainbow Dash just nodded with a shrug. “Actually that sounds pretty awesome, they’d be a tough act to beat.”

“Then that’s one team I’m glad we don’t have to face.” Laughing, Dash continued to walk over to the notes on the wall. “There is a bit of a formation problem I’ve been having trouble with where you might be able to help. You can also take a rule book or two home to browse through if you want.”

“Homework?” Grimacing for a moment before following her over the wall of notes, Scootaloo began to scan over the crude pictures and writings.

“You’re a mare after my own heart. Now have a look at these. They’re all about our gliding formations. You might notice something off about them.”

“I don’t have to look at them to know what’s off.” She gave her Captain a flat look. “They basically say I suck at gliding. You and Spike do it so easily, but I’m constantly trying to adjust myself to meet you, I look awful whenever I have to fly slowly like that.”

“And you said I wasn’t thinking team spirit enough. Like you just said, my problems are your problems, but your problems are our problems too, but you’re missing the real problem here. See these distances under you and me? This is how far I can go on average before needing a second wing beat.”

“Thirty-two meters?!” Scootaloo balked, “I got what, six? Six is all I have?!”

“Give or take…” Failing to mention that there was a lot more give than take seemed the better option here. “So, gliding is your rough spot. Don’t take it too hard, Squirt. You’re an impulsive flier and you like to move to your own beat, that’s going to make formation flying difficult, and you’ll have to work harder on it. The minimum qualification is ten meters, I’m sure you can work your way up to that over the next couple weeks with enough practice. The bigger problem is actually Spike’s.”

“Spike? But he isn’t having any trouble with gliding at all.” Looking at her fellow fledgling’s note left her kind of confused. “Why doesn’t it say anything?”

“Because he’s faking it.” A wry smile took over her features, a bit of pride slipping into her tone. “Every time he makes a wing beat, it’s perfectly synchronized with mine. He’s been trying to hide it, but I don’t think he even has a gliding limit! As far as anypony can tell dragons might be able to glide forever.”

“Jeez, how lucky can you get? How can that even happen, I mean, he’s a dragon! He weighs as much as both of us together, how can he hold himself up in the air so easily?”

“That’s where that pile comes in.” Dash pointed to the neat efficient notes piled on her dresser. “These are everything we’ve learned about dragon flight patterns. It’s all sciencey and stuff, but it’s actually a pretty cool read once you can get past that. Most of them are Twilight’s studies of Spike, so we’re not sure if it’s the same for every dragon, but we’re only interested in one anyway.”

“Alright, so how does it work?”

“Same idea as Twilight’s balloon from what I can tell. Dragon fire mixed with air makes some kind of gas inside him that makes him a lot lighter in the air than when on the ground.”

“So, the more fire he’s got, the easier it is to fly?”

“Keeping it simple, that’s why I like you. Problem is, it gets way more complicated than that, but it does all revolve around that fire of his. Have you ever noticed when you get close to him while he’s flying, the air around him seems warmer?”

“You noticed that too? It’s so weird right? Flying over him feels like you’re right on top of a big pocket of hot air.”

“That’s because you are. You probably heard Pegasi throw the term ‘thermals’ around every now and then, right? It’s short for a ‘thermal column’. They’re one of the three types of lift that keep you, and birds, and anything else in the sky that belongs there. Apparently, Spike makes his own wherever he goes! Those extra joints he has in his wings are basically for catching and controlling his own thermals. So if you combine gasses, wing control, and thermals, apparently you can even get a two ton dragon in the sky.”

“I think I liked it better when we just called it magic.” Scootaloo deadpanned, much to her coach’s amusement. “So why does any of this matter again? I thought you said it was a problem, it sounds like anything but.”

“The problem is all those thermals he’s making wreak havoc with our formations. He’s accidentally pushing you off to the side, that’s why you’re so shaky all the time. It doesn’t affect me because I’m in front, but you get caught with it during the entire flight path.”

“Wait, so the reason I suck at gliding because of Spike?!”

“I wouldn’t say that… I mean Spike isn’t helping, but no, you’re actually just terrible at gliding. Pretty much any other fledgling in the competition would be able to handle the draft Spike gives off with ease.”

“Gee, thanks.” The sarcasm wasn’t lost on her coach.

“Come on kiddo, like I said before, don’t take it too hard. We all have a tough time with one thing or another when it comes to flying. It’s just that the other fledglings have been training at this for over a year, where you and Spike will have just over a month of full on flight training. Give yourself another year and you’ll be able to handle Spike’s thermals like a piece of cake too. I’m more concerned on what we can do about it now.”

“There’s only two things we can do. Make me better at gliding or stop Spike from leaking.”

“Stop Spike from leaking?” The thought gave Dash pause. Spike needed the thermals to fly, so blocking them was out of the question, but redirecting them...

“Yeah, but at the same time, I don’t really want to.” Her coach’s response gone unnoticed, the young pegasus continued her ponderings. “I mean, my board only works on clouds and lifts, if he’s leaving a trail of lift wherever he goes, think of the stunts I could pull off!”

“Scootaloo! You’re a genius!” Grabbing a quill, she snatched a crudely drawn picture of Spike off her wall and began making adjustments.

“Naturally.” Nodding her agreement with her Captain’s assessment, Scootaloo looked over her mentor’s shoulder, trying to make out just what genius thought she had. Rainbow Dash looked back at her audience and grinned widely, and presented the new creation to her audience. The quickly drawn picture now had their draconic teammate sporting what looked to be like heavy, black, and villainous-looking armour.

******

“Fasten down the shutters! Stock the stores! Brace up the barns!” The cry of warning echoed out past the old farmhouse, over the hills, and far out into the apple orchard. The panicking, old green mare kicked open the door with a strength that belied her many years. Her white mane and tail, normally tied tightly up into neat little buns, now hung loose, leaving her looking frazzled and fearful, which indeed was not far from the case. Her trademark neckerchief was tied up awkwardly, sure signs there was a rush to her step. She stood panting in the doorway, an arm full of non-perishable goods gathered in her forelegs.

She looked this way and that out of the door before bolting for the old storm shelter built into the foundation of the old farmhouse with her precious supplies. Winona, the ever loyal Apple Family dog, was jumping around her ankles, barking excitedly and chasing after her, hoping to help in whatever way she could.

“There she goes again!” Applejack rolled her eyes, before springing into action. She snatched her up her rope with tail as she dashed by the bushels of apples she and Apple Bloom had been sorting through. Her little sister was fast on her tail, ready to play her part n the action that was sure to unfold. As Applejack ran past she called out to her older brother and her cousin Braeburn who were loudly sorting lumber onto a couple wagons.

“Big Macintosh! Granny Smith’s gotten herself loose again!”

The two cousins grimaced at each other before laying down their loads and took off after the sisters.

“Alright yah three, yah know what tah do?”

“Eeyup!” Her brother answered for the trio as they ran in a well practiced formation behind her. She began twirling the rope, and narrowed her eyes at her gran who was on her way back to the house for more supplies. The old mare caught sight of the four determined young farm ponies bearing down on her.

“You young ‘uns don’t know what yer doin’!” She shouted as she made a beeline for front door of the house. Apple Bloom was the faster of the two by far however, she squeezed past the open door before her Gran could get through, locking it behind her and sealing the poor mare outside. She quickly went to the closest window to keep an eye on how the rest of the plan went.

Her exit sealed off, Granny Smith ran from one side of the house to the next in attempt to lose her pursuers, but every path she took Applejack, Big Macintosh, and Braeburn were there until they finally had her cornered between them and the wall.

She backed up slowly as they moved in on her carefully, she was staring the three down, looking for any opening she could use between them. She jumped one way, faked another, and feigned a sprint, each attempt failed as the three expertly closed off every route she tried. Granny Smith eyed the lasso Applejack swung around slowly, menacingly.

“I ain’t beat yet!” She cried out before the spry, old mare suddenly bolted right up the wall to the low hanging roof, surprising them all. Climbing up to the roof was a skill she was well familiar with, and she could do so with ease in her younger years, long since memorizing every out of place shingle that was just wide enough to climb up. It seemed she still had enough tricks left in her to pull it off one more time. She turned to face her three onlookers triumphantly up on her hind legs and eyes closed in self admiration. “Yah see? Yah don’t be underestimatin’ me! Why, when Ah was young, Ah used tah out-race everypony in town! No one could ever come close to catchin’ yer Gran, cept this one time when-”

She felt a familiar tightness pin her forelegs to her sides when she stopped paying attention to tell her story. Her eyes opened in surprise and looked down at the lasso, now binding her. “Aw nuts...”

Applejack smiled and gave the rope a good tug, taking her right off the low roof and into the arms of the two stallions. They quickly used the rest of the rope to tie the old mare up tight, ignoring her protests, kicks, and struggles.

“Whew! Good job everypony! That was the quickest we got ‘er down yet.” Applejack congratulated her team’s efforts.

“Ah’m tellin’ yas yer makin’ a big mistake! There’s rings round the moon, and red skies in the morning! Birds are flying towards the mountains! All the cows got their backs to the Everfree! Salt’s clogged in the shakers, and now the windows are stuck tight just this mornin’! There’s a Nor’easter comin’! Yah mark mah words! Ah can feel it in mah teeth an’ mah knees!”

“Are yah sure about this sis?” Apple Bloom stuck her head out the window to listen. “Gran ain’t never been wrong before.”

“She’s been goin’ on like this since every day for the past week, ain’t nuthin come of it at all. Ah don’t know if the weather’s playin’ tricks on her signs or something, but yesterday mornin’ the weather ponies came back from every direction around Ponyville. Ain’t no storms in the works, they said, and weren’t none too pleased about bein’ sent off on a wild goose chase for days at a time. And Ah ain’t lettin’ ‘er pack up all our food stocks intah the cellar, we still got a farm tah run.”

“Even the critters are actin’ up! Look here!” Granny Smith gestured to Winoa who was indeed jumping around at Big Macintosh as he carried their hogtied grandmother back to their house.

“She’s worked up cause o’ all the ruckus yah been causin’!” Applejack called after her in frustration. Wasn’t it bad enough with the rest of the farm trouble that the Apple Family didn’t have to make more of it themselves, just when things were starting to look better? After what was being termed as ‘The Gathering in the Cornfield’,there was a bargain to see to with all the insects across their lands. They were busier than ever getting ready for harvest season with that whole new grove of land to farm and till for trees and crops. They had to go a long ways out of their way to plow it too, the bugs had chosen the west bank of the river as their new home, and it wasn’t anywhere that could be called close to the farm. Applejack wanted to make sure the bugs weren’t going to have to do their part completely on good faith. It may have been far from the farm, but her pride and gratefulness to them wouldn’t allow her to wait til next Spring before the land in the area would get its first tilling.

“Yah sure yah don’t need mah help, Cuz?” Braeburn offered once more. He’d been offering it more and more as the date of his return to Appleoosa came closer and closer. Come the next sunrise he’d be up and at the station. However, while he collected supplies over the last couple months to go back West with, he’d grown as anxious about the farm’s predicament as it’s more permanent residents. “Yah know Ah could put off the barn building a few more weeks without hurtin’ nopony, and y’all have yer hooves full here already.”

“Ain’t gonna hear no more of it.” She closed her eyes with a resolute look. “Yer all packed up and ready tah go already. Yah even got a cart on the train reserved for tomorrow, it’d be a waste o’ bits tah miss it. It’s been a rough patch here, Ah admit, but we got plenty friends helpin’ out already. Yah’ve gone and done more’n yer fair share. Yah’ve been a lifesaver ‘round here Braeburn, yah got our thanks for it too, but yah got yer own troubles tah deal with out your way. Now don’t you worry, if things get dire we’ll know where there’s help waitin’.”

“Yah just remember tah keep me ‘n mine in mind. We owe yer friends and yerself a lot, and we don’t forget our debts in Aaaaaaappleoosa” He began to make his way back into the house with Big Macintosh to help figure out a new way to restrain Granny Smith from barricading the house shut anymore than she already had. On his way in he paused by the mare in the window. “Apple Bloom, Ah’d like tah have a word with yah about yer barn designs, if yah got a moment.”

“Sure thing Cuz, anything Ah can do tah help!” The young farm pony grinned widely. She was really liking this barn project of Braeburns. Everypony looked to her to lead for once, and when you’re the youngest on a farm, authority is in small supply, and high demand. Chances to prove yourself capable only came by every so often, and those looks of admiration she’d get when working on her projects would soon be gone with her cousin. She was hoping to milk every last moment out of it it she could.

“Good tah hear it, run and get some tea on, and a bite tah eat for us. We got some business propositions tah go over, and it’s always thirsty work.”

“Business?” Both sisters’ eyes widened at the word.

“Well o’ course. Family is family, but business is business. Yah’ve gone and done good by us with all yer work on these barn designs, it’s about time we talked about what Aaaaaaaaapleoosa owes yah for it.”

Apple Bloom’s surprise slowly turned into excitement as it dawned on her what he was saying. Payment? She never really accepted payment for her work before, it was still amateurish, and more or less a favour to her just to allow her to work on the projects before this!

“Yer sure about that? We ain’t lookin’ for charity here,” Applejack eyed her well-meaning cousin suspiciously.

“Charity nuthin’! Apple Bloom’s done us well on those designs, and there’s still a lotta town to build out our way. New settlers are headin’ out all the time, and bits are being spread out far and wide to expand, expand, expand! I’m ain’t just talkin’ ‘bout barn work neither. Houses, farms, wells, ranches, an’ just about every other kinda necessity yah can think of that a town has. They all need tah be built by somepony. We got one chance tah build the place up right, and this little one’s gotta knack for it. Havin’ her involved in the city plannin’ would be doin’ good by a lotta folks way I figure it.”

Satisfied with the explanation Applejack looked to her sister. “Whatta yah say tah that Apple Bloom?”

“No need to say anything right yet.” Braeburn advised the excited younger sibling, “Business first, answers last.”

“Then Ah say, lets get down tah business!” She hooted and reared up before running to put on tea and ready some refreshments much to Applejack’s and Braeburn’s amusement.

“Ah think she’s gonna do alright for herself.” He nodded at the retreating pony’s back with a smile. “and a whole lotta others, I reckon.”

“Braeburn?” The older sibling started, trying to put thought into word for everything he’d done since he first got off the train. Taking over her chores while she was gone gem digging with Twilight, giving Apple Bloom her hoof in the door to her trade, or just being around to comfort the family in the middle of some hard knocks. She couldn’t count the number of things he went out of his way to help them with while he was busy with his own tasks, and never a complaint or sore word from him; just another smile, a tip of his hat, and another offer of help. She guessed there was only ever a single word that could encompass all that, but it never seemed enough for those that deserved it most. She said it now with all the genuine sincerity she could.

“Thanks.”

Tipping his hat, he turned and treated her to a silent smile, there was a knowing look in his eye that told her he understood how much it meant. As he turned once more to head back into the farmhouse Applejack understood something too. Sometimes a single word was all that was needed.

“AJ!” The sudden, deep bellow from inside made her wince on instinct. When Big Macintosh got loud, it was almost always filled with disappointment or anger, and there was soon to be a pretty, hard scolding to follow. Nowadays it was Apple Bloom’s antics that caused the big, red stallion to raise his voice, but more than once she too had been on the receiving end of one of his angry lectures. There was something different in his tone this time, it sounded like… surprise? She didn’t stop to think about it, rushing past her cousin who was soon on her heels. Had Granny Smith gotten past the hulking figure her brother made? The squirrely, old mare could certainly pull it off! She skidded into the kitchen ready for anything.

There her younger sister sat beside her wide-eyed grandmother who was firmly tied to a chair. Her brother looked completely astonished, standing between the two, and staring down at an opened letter on the table.

“Big Mac? What in tarnation was that about?”

“Uh, Ah read it AJ, but Ah ain’t sure Ah read it right.” He gestured to the envelope.

The return address was to Canterlot. It was a letter direct from Rarity. The Apple family hadn’t heard much from Rarity directly, it was far faster to receive by dragon mail, and so almost everything came through Twilight first. Whatever was written in there was important enough that it was sent to them first, and had left her entire family silently dumbfounded. She moved over to pick it up, and emptied the contents, several pages fell into her hoof. One looked very official, the other was unsurprisingly from Rarity. She began reading aloud so Braeburn could hear.

Dear Applejack and family,

As you know, I’ve been looking into your financial situation for these last several months, and we’ve made progress towards your gains using the dwindling gem supplies near Ponyville. I’m sorry to say that our business together has come to its end. It was a pleasure working with you and yours, my jewel stocks are full for years to come, and while I love to continue our with our agreed arrangements, I am simply afraid you’ve no longer any need of me. With the signing of the official transport and customs agreement enclosed within this letter, any further time spent mining would be a detriment to your farmland pursuits.

Applejack glanced at the official looking sheets of hard to read text, filled with blanks for signatures and dates. It would take too long to read it all, so she just read the title instead for now.

“Equestria’s Service and Goods Transportations Office? What’s this all about?” Passing the papers over to Big Macintosh to browse over, she turned back to Rarity’s letter looking for further explanation.

I have finally determined the largest difficulty your efforts have been encountering. We’ve mistakenly been under the belief that the continued disasters that strike Sweet Apple Acres on regular occasion are to blame for the lack of profit coming in to support the farm. The truth is that many farms across Equestria have equally difficult issues to attend to, though perhaps not quite so often. There is something far more simple, and devious at work here, and it is the simple concept of supply and demand. Exports of common crops to Canterlot has been at an all time low for the past couple years, due to the stigma that has come with consuming what has come to be known around here as ‘common food’. I believe it is a term you are personally familiar with from your attempt to market your wares at the Gala.

Simply put, you have unintentionally been flooding the Canterlot market with apples to the point every pony here takes them for granted! I, at first, saw this as a necessary evil that we have no control over as Canterlot is the closest, and largest city to your farm, and therefore was set up to be Ponyville’s best trading partner. I was wrong. In fact, after only a quick glance I was easily able to ascertain a better trading party that is absolutely desperate for goods. The answer surprised me, and will likely surprise you, though it should have been obvious to us both!

The Crystal Kingdom.

As it turns out, being trapped outside our realm for millennia does very poorly for a kingdom’s countryside farms, leaving them without any at all! It is still a very new market that nopony has really picked up on yet. Grasping the opportunity I have worked out a deal with Princess Cadence that will supply them with goods from your farm for as long as you maintain in good repute. This deal will require lessening the wasted amounts being sent to Canterlot, and perhaps the less commonplace they become here, the more their worth will increase for future agreements. Those thoughts, however, are for years down the road. For now, it seems your best business would be to export your business to ponies who would better appreciate it.

Princess Cadence also wished me to send along her gratitude for helping her Kingdom in its hour of need, both in its creation and now in its continued support. Between the treaty you have arranged with the insects of Ponyville, Twilight’s adjustments, and the contents of this contract terms, it all seemed a little overcomplicated to me, so I had the gentlepoines I was working with break it all down to simpler form, I hope you don’t mind that I’ve included it here.

Your ever-loving friend, and fellow Element of Harmony,

Rarity

“There she goes again! Overcomplicated nuthin’! Honestly, it’s obvious as a cat in a hen house she knows exactly what it means. She probably thinks it’d be half a week before any of us figure it out on our own. Us poor simple folk can’t even read what them big city ponies like her put down on paper, why Ah got half a mind to-” She felt her jaw go slack as she went to glare at the numbers in question, all anger forgotten in light of their presence. “I-is this right?”

“Eeyup.” Big Macintosh answered, still looking at the contents of the contract.

“Does this mean what Ah think it means?”

“Eeyup.” Her brother answered once more, looking up from the contract.

“We did it?” Biting her lip, Applejack had to put the letter down, and wipe her eyes. “E-everything’s gonna be okay?”

“Better’n okay.” Large, red forelegs gathered her in a hug. She used them to hide the tears she couldn’t stop, crying into her big brother’s chest. “If that friend o’ yours got her numbers right, this ol’ farm might never have this kinda trouble again. We might even have tah look intah expanding. Yah done good AJ, yah done good.”

As the realization set in the burden began to lift, and Applejack was only now able to feel just how much she had been carrying on her shoulders. The relief that flooded her now shook her to the core and she shook with it, sobs escaping her in spite of her best efforts. The farm was as much apart of her family as the stallion holding her, or the other ponies at her side. Their great grandfather found it, and her parents worked themselves into the ground to make sure it prospered and flourished as a resource their children’s children’s children would be able to count on. An Apple Family legacy to supply for all their descendents as long as it was taken care of, and they’d come so close to losing it all. They had nearly lost everything their parents had died for.

For months the threat loomed at the back of her mind. The stress of the secrecy kept her away from most of her friends in fear of her own honest nature giving herself away. Week after week of digging up cartloads of gems with Twilight, dragging them to the train station, all in the middle of getting everything for the harvest just around the corner, and trying to complete her regular chores on top of it all. All that was keeping her from collapsing beneath the weight of it all, was the fate that awaited her family if she stopped for even a day. Now that it was over, all that held her up was her brother’s strong legs. She was finally calming down when she felt another sob wrack her body, but this one wasn’t from her.

The strong, silent, patient, and stable figure that was often the foundation and pillar of their family was quietly weeping against her. Him too, she recognized, everything she had endured through the hard weeks he had too. Unknowingly, each had been counting on the other to manage their own sides of the puzzle that were the farm’s finances. Where she had focused on making extra money in other areas to keep the farm afloat, he had been burning the candle at both ends to figure out how to stretch the money they had. Up long before everypony else on the farm, and in bed long after, pushing papers and numbers around the best he could.

He was studying the business books Twilight had advised him to look into, and new age agriculture techniques, both mundane and arcane in nature. Any new suggestion or change for the farm that came along, he was the one that to implement it. Change came hard for her family, and none more so than for her tradition-loving big brother. It must have been exhausting. They had been holding each other up all this time, and it seemed fitting they were all that was holding each other up while the end was in sight.

“You too, Big Mac. You too.”

“Well now, this calls fer a celebration!” Their hug was interrupted by Granny Smith who was already warming up the oven and digging out the cooking pots. The chair she was tied to previously was empty, the ropes chewed through by a loyal family dog that now played at her heels. “You youngsters jus’ gonna stand there all day? We got a humdinger of a supper to make! Apple Bloom, go on and get to invitin’ folk over. We’re gonna put together a kitchen party tah remember!”

“This ain’t just some new ploy tah stock more supplies into the cellar is it?” Suspicion clouded Applejack’s thoughts concerning the old pony’s intentions. The wild goose chases she had them on lately was still fresh in her mind.

“We’ll deal with it when it comes. Way Ah figure, it was you two that pulled the farm outta hot water that Ah helped get it intah. Ah guess Ah oughta trust yah both enough tah handle whatever trouble’s headed our way like yah’ve been doin’. Jus’ don’t say I didn’t tell yah so when that trouble comes knockin’.”

“Well dang, if that ain’t good timing all around. I won’t feel bad about heading back home now that this is behind the ol’ farm. I can’t tell you all how guilty I’ve felt about hitting the road tomorrow.” Braeburn sat down with a relieved sigh. Hanging around Sweet Apple Acres had been a wild ride that he wouldn’t soon forget. Feeling a hoof tap his shoulder he turned around, surprised to see the youngest member of the Apple Family looking more angry at the news than relieved.

“Name whatever price yah want. Ah just got one condition, Ah wanna be on the train with yah come sunrise. Ah’ll go pack mah things.”

Feeling like he just got bucked upside the head, the reason she was angry became all too clear. The secret the older siblings had been keeping from Apple Bloom was out. He gave a low and quiet whistle, grimacing at the cloud that was hidden behind this silver lining. Seems not everything was solved as neatly as he first thought it was. There was going to be an apology on the horizon, and though the Apple Family farm might’ve been saved, their family was going to be one less sibling for it for a good while.

Author's Note:

Hopefully this chapter is not as disappointing as that Superman movie. Hopefully if you were as tortured by it as I was this will lessen your pain somewhat...

Comments

[DARKPHANTOM13]

Another great chapter dude. A cool trick for him to do would be to either cover himself with fire and look like a green comet or fire mail one of his teammates and have her reappear in a huge blast of fire unhurt. And I also hate how Spike doesn't get the hero treatment. And just because he and Twilight are gaining some distance between each other doesn't mean they will stop being part of each others lives. If he and Rarity becomes and couple he does realize that he would have to give up some Twilight time for Rarity. And that goes double if Rarity asks him to live with her. While I normally prefer the version of Spike that wants his time to shine and prove himself I got to respect this version and the depth you have given him.

[Fido]

Great chapter as always. Haven't seen Man of Steel yet, though everyone seems to be raving about it.

[Neutrinos are Magic]

Everything had always focused on her and her friends, of course, he was just there to help. In a way that was exactly how he liked it. Just helping others when and where he could. He was the side to their show, the extra guiding claw where it was needed, the underlying support to the Elements of Harmony. It was like a not-so-secret pride, a great respect he had for himself. He didn't need the glory, their glory was his.

It was just enough attention without all the weight of responsibility that came with making those big decisions. He was a follower, not a leader, and he liked it that way.

This is so me.

[Shokinaw]

2734522
Difference of opinion I guess, Spike is a background character who has always enjoyed his role as a sidekick. I think it'd take a pretty monumental or epic scenerio to change that aspect about him. I think most fics where he wants to shine on his own without showing some major reason why his main mindset changed are missing out on one of his greatest traits. Contentedness in servitude is not a detriment as many seem to think.

2734601
I would like to rave, but the thing I hated most about it is what he did to defeat Zod, and saying it would be a spoiler. When you do see it, know that at that precise moment is when he was simply not the man in red and blue I've rooted for for most of my childhood.

2734685
This is a LOT of people, the far majority actually, but we all have to make those tough choices sometime. Whether we choose the right or wrong choice, doesn't matter as much as the courage it took to step up.

[Path_of_cloud]

Aren’t I entitled some privacy?” to some

Dischord, Discord is spelled as such,

we are having a formation problem you I’ve been having trouble. Need to replace you with something else, maybe that, or perhaps adding something.

He beganto. began to

“Yer sure about that? We ain’t lookin’ for charity here,” Applejack eyed her well-meaning cousin suspiciously.
“Charity nuthin’! Need an extra enter at this paragraph break.

Rarity has a throne, always the princess It's just to her not to be funny. Filthy Rich always seems like a pretty good guy to me, even here helping his daughter into the business world... shame DT is a bitch and all. Still, she certainly has a talent for business.

I sense a storm coming, in more ways than one.

[DARKPHANTOM13]

2735372 I see where you are coming from on this. The Spikefics that I like the most often have him doing something incredible making him realize that he could be truly great if he tries hard enough and that he doesn't have to be the side character that usually in the Mane Six's shadows. That is what Celestia was more or less trying to do.

[Imaginary Valued]

This was a great chapter and a wonderful read. The characters were, as usual, portrayed very well and were engaging in their interactions. What I didn't expect was Diamond Tiara, who really stole the show in this chapter. She was an utter female dog this time around as usual, but also conniving and diabolical in an almost respectable way. Truly furthering the up-and-coming evil-ish businessmare image she's striving to be.

[Shokinaw]

2735819
Yep, I just don't think he'd take that plunge without a big push from some pony he really respects.
(And yes, that is exactly what Celestia was trying to do in this fic,)

[Shokinaw]

2736291
It's great to see what different parts of the chapter caught different people's attention. For you, DT kicked a lotta arse this time round. Many felt that it was the brother and sister relationship between Twilight and Spike that captured their attention. Still my non-fimfiction reader felt it was the science of dragon flight and the solution to the farm troubles that held their applause.
It's too bad no one said anything about Scoot and Dash's little exchange, there were quite a few little tidbits in that conversation that had me cracking up while writing it.

Myself I really enjoy writing for DT, a lot of writers, I notice, write her as a bully and nothing else, but they're missing out on the best part! Is she ruthless? Yes, but she's also very successful if left to her own devices. DT is a very intelligent pony that knows what sells and how to sell it. She doesn't think inside the box either. Where most ponies are compassionate and caring before anything else, DT stands against the grain and pushes back, and she does so with a surprising amount of ingenuity and success rate. She turned an elementary school paper into a gossip rag that every pony in town wanted to read. She may have been punished for it in the end, but no one can deny how well it worked. There's few stories out there where she's written with intelligence in mind, I wanted to add to their number.

2735640
Thanks for catching the mistakes, it was so late by the time I ended up posting this chapter... That's not a good enough excuse, but it's the one I'm going with.

"Well, I am living in Canterlot now, after all, a bit of... extravagance here and there is expected!"

I think people write Filthy Rich to be more than just a rich version of his daughter is because he remembered Granny Smith, and where his start came from. In either case, I do kinda like the guy. I even like DT, though, so I'm probably not the one to say. I can really picture her with 'want-to-be-like-daddy' issues, is that just me?

[Path_of_cloud]

2737412 There were a lot of things that got me laughing... Spike trying to fly without wings for one.

She certainly has the abillity.

Yes, what is wrong with you! Spike makes a much better seat.

Yeah, Filthy Rich is a pretty nice guy it seems. It's good to see him worry about DT.

[Shokinaw]

2737637
Hatchling Spike breaking his limbs from a horrible fall is funny to you?! Dark fic authors.... *shudders* I will never understand.

Yeah, I like him worrying about DT, but more than that, I like her worrying about him. showing that she does actually think about somepony other than herself is the main point I was trying to push there. Farmers aren't the only families that can be real close.

[Path_of_cloud]

2737829 It's more the idea of him going "I'm gonna fly... I was totally wrong about this!"

Indeed.

[Shokinaw]

2738100
Okay, that is kinda funny with the mental picture that goes along with that dialogue.

[Frazzled Pony]

Great chapter. This story is impressive, both for it's emotional depth and for how much there is in it. A story with three different storylines, Rarity, the Flyers and The Farm, would feel stuffed to the breaking point if it weren't for your inspiring ability to juggle the storylines and characters. Also, while I'm mentioning emotional depth, have a cookie for doing this story with great emotions but without getting melodramatic. Many fanfics get really melodramatic, but you've avoided that trap while still writing strong emotions. Well done.

Time for the criticism:
You have quite a few places where you either seem to miss a word, a letter or have an extra letter or an additional space. As in "here is too much space".

You also have problems with past and present tense. Quite a few places you shift to present tense, and though some places you could argue that it is correct, a few places it's seems jarringly incorrect, at least to me. I suggest keeping past tense constantly, because none of your present tense sentences (in the narration) would be wrong if written in past tense, but some of them are wrong as they are now.

Specifics:

“...” Twilight chewed her lip as she stared at his back. What she would do? She couldn’t deny the accusation of hypocrisy, even if it wasn’t meant to be one. How many times had he watched her risk herself for everypony else? Nightmare Moon, Dischord, Queen Chryslis, and even King Sombra?"
First, avoid those "...". It is an amateurish way to write people hesitating. Write that Twilight stays silent. Don't make an empty comment like that. Second, you've misspelled both Discord and Chrysalis.

"and new contacts had already drummed up exponentially more than her little shop back in Ponyville." Exponential is a growth form. You can only use it if you say that something is growing exponentially. Something can grow exponentially, sales rarely do, but one number of sales can't be called exponentially more than another, that is simple wrong. Use some other word that actually works.

"She was very pleased over it all, and very, very tired." I suggest "with" instead of "over". Pretty sure that is the correct wording.

"It wasn’t her work that troubled her, in truth almost any single one of the designs would catch the attention of the ponies at the Fledgling Flier Competition, which is all that Rainbow Dash had wanted." One, I suggest replacing the first comma with a full stop. That's my opinion in a lot of places in this fic actually. Two: tense trouble again, most of this is in past tense but then you suddenly use "is" in the last part. That is simply wrong, replace it with "was", so you get "which was all...".

"Her mind turned to the week after, and that whole gala ticket debacle. It would be the first design she would ever make for a dragon. She thought it was adorable, he was less than enthused." "Would" is kinda odd here, as it relates to the future and she's remembering an event. I suggest "It had been the first design she had ever made for a dragon".

"The absence of her audience is something Rarity always noticed, but she smiled inwardly as she took note of what had caught his attention." Mixing up tenses again. I suggest "was something Rarity always noticed", particularly because "noticed" is in past tense. At least keep your tense consistent in a single sentence.

“They really are well done. I was quite proud of you when I seen them." I think you mean "when I saw them".

"Rarity was a hard read when she was trying to be nice about something she did not exactly care for." This is just odd, because this seems to imply that she is only hard to read when she doesn't care for something, which somehow makes her easy to read, because if she is only hard to read when she doesn't like something, then you can read the unreadability as disapproval. I suggest just "I was always hard to read whether Rarity was simply being polite about something she didn't care for or if she truly liked it."

"Dash’s diet was made almost completely up of grass. It sounded incredibly bland, and when asked, his Captain confirmed his suspicions." Separating "made" and "up" looks odd, I suggest "diet consisted almost entirely of grass."

"he would usually only give him vague hints of a direction he should follow, or sometimes ignore his problems completely, expecting him to sort it all out" Here you missed the importatnt "s" in "she", when talking about Celestia. Pretty sure the princess is a she.

"The early autumn sun was sinking behind the mountains on the far side of Ponyville, streaks of red and orange light fell between lengthening shadows that traced their way across the land." Again, I suggest replacing the first comma with a full stop. It just seems more correct in my head.

"Some of the pages she’d be perusing weren’t even books yet, they were just notes for a book still to be completed! How egg-headish is that?!" First, it should be "she'd been perusing". Second, I suggest using "How egg-headish was that?", because multiple punctuations in a sentence is amateurish and the change in tense seems jarring here.

"If you do really want to help, we are having a formation problem you I’ve been having trouble with, and you can take a rule book or two home to browse through.” You write "problem you I've been having trouble with". It should either be "you've been" or "I've been". Not both. Also, I suggest "If you really do want to help", instead of what you have.

"which indeed was not far from the case." Odd mixing of expressions. I suggest sticking with "not far from the truth" or "indeed was the case".

"Winoa, the ever loyal Apple Family dog," Pretty sure it's "Winona".

"Her little sister was fast on her tail, ready to play her part the action that was sure to unfold." Missed an "in" in "her part in the action that was..."

" CLimbing up to the roof was a long practiced skill for her, and she could do so without issue in her younger years" Additional space, capital "L" in "Climbing", and the sentence is just a little odd with the "long practised skill". I suggest rewording it to avoid "long practised skill for her", because it just looks odd to me.

"Seems she still had enough tricks left in her to pull it off one more time." Again, I suggest a different tense, as in "It seemed she still had..."

"Why, when Ah was young, Ah used tah out race everypony in town!" Think it should be "out-race".

"They quickly used the rest of the rope to tie the old mare up tight, ignorant of her protests, kicks, and struggles." They're not "ignorant" of her protests, that means that they don't know about them. They are ignoring them.

"He’d been offering it more and more as the date of his return to Appleoosa came closer and closer." I suggest using just one "closer" here, because two "something and something" in the same sentence seems too much somehow.

"He beganto make his way back into the house with Big Macintosh to help figure out a new way to restrain Granny Smith from barricading the house shut anymore than she had." One, missed a space between "began" and "to". Also, I think an "already" between "she" and "had" would to wonders.

"Everypony looked to her to lead for once, and when you’re the youngest on a farm, authority is in small supply, and high demand. Chances to prove yourself capable only came by every so often, and those looks of admiration she’d get when working on her projects would soon be gone with her cousin." This is not a criticism, this is one of the few places where I think your change to present tense works. I still think your "small supply and high demand" is a little odd.

"Nowadays it was Apple Bloom’s antics that caused it the big, red stallion to raise his voice, but more than once in her younger years, she too had been on the receiving end of a chewing out." Remove the "it" before "the big red stallion. Also "chewing out" as a noun looks odd to me, I suggest either "scolding" or "she too had been chewed out".
“
"There her younger sister sat beside her wide-eyed grandmother who was firmly tied to a chair. Her brother completely astonished, standing between the two, staring down at an opened letter on the table. The last sentence lacks a proper verb.I suggest "Her brother looked completely astonished. standing between..."

"It was a letter direct from Rarity." "Direct" looks odd here. To me at least.

"Whatever was written in there was important enough that it was sent to them first, and had left her family, even as wild as Granny Smith had been over the last few weeks, silently dumbfounded." Kinda clumsy here because there is such a large sentence in between "family" and "silently dumbfounded".

"Grasping the opportunity I have worked out a deal with Princess Cadence that will supply them with goods from your farm for as long as you maintain in good repute." Might be me that don't understand the fancy talk, but the "maintain in good repute" looks odd to me.

"This deal with require lessening the wasted amounts being sent to Canterlot, and perhaps the less common place they become here, they’ll be worth trading with once more." One, it should be "This deal will require lessening..." Two, I think it should be "as they become less common here, they'll be worth trading once more."

"The farm was as much apart of her family as the stallion holding her, or the other ponies at her side." It should be "a part". "Apart" means being separate from.

"For months the threat loomed at the back of her mind, the stress of the secrecy kept her away from most of her friends in fear her honest nature would give herself away." I think you should change the first comma to a full stop and I suggest "...her friends in fear of her honest nature giving herself away."

"Suspicion clouded Applejack’s thoughts of the old pony’s intentions." This just looks odd.

Anyway, still a good chapter, I only try to help you improve because I enjoy your work. Happy writing and update soon!

[Christian2400]

Lovely chapter

There is something far more simple, and devious at work her,

Guessing you meant here?

[Shokinaw]

2752545
It has been fixed! Glad you enjoyed, and thanks for helping me make it better,

[Shokinaw]

2739558
Whew! Sorry this took so long to reply to, I didn't want to comment until the long list of corrections were made. Let me start again, first, by responding to the good. Thank you so much for your huge endeavor to make this fic far better than it would be if it were just me continuing to type on as if I know what I'm doing. I really do appreciate it. I think the whole fun of writing for me is getting into into the character's moods and mindsets, and their chemistry with those around them.

Unfortunately, you are correct, far more often than needed, drama turns into an anguish to read about. I do love me some dramatics, but I always try to keep in mind that this is a cartoon I'm writing for, and as such the light-hearted side of things should win out in the end. Hence tidbits of humour, slapstick, saying the wrong thing, clumsy antics, or whatnot split up what could be a scene far too depressing. A story is nothing without some tension and complications of the protagonist's goals, but I do my best to leave people with a smile.
(even though sometimes there's a tear that comes with it)

I have a few questions to toss your way, as you seem to have a lot of experience writing, or at least editing. My first would be, what defines a storyline? I'm not sure where the sub plots end and main plots begin half the time. For you there's three storylines, and for me well there is:
Rarity moving away, the crusaders growing up and moving away, Rainbow Dash's flight lessons, the farm troubles, Twilight's assistant needs, Spike's dragon dilemmas,
I would include any one of these as a main plot, and I feel knowing the difference would be a benefit to future stories of mine.

Mistakes in plenty? Please bypass next part if you hate backpedaling, whiny excuses!

First excuse, is I'm a blind idiot and I don't notice half as much as I would like to when I edit the chapter before posting.

2. I am the definition of an amateur writer, actually, I might not even be counted as that! This is literally the first piece of hobby writing I have ever done, and very rarely have I ever done any other form of writing. I mostly use what I've read among other fanfics and fantasy novels to help guide me.

C. Back in grade school my teachers taught me to read a sentence out loud, if it sounds right go ahead and use it. The thing about that is I'm a native Cape Bretoner from the east side of Canada. We have pretty heavy accents, and often speak however we like. As long as the point gets across, we feel we've done it right. That's where this whole 'tense' problem comes in, where it's jarring to you, it sounds absolutely perfect to me, and I miss it every single time! This also accounts for when things read very odd to you most times.

Last but not least, the few places I didn't take your suggestions, I hope you'll forgive me. In the end some expressions are just how we say things where I come from, and I don't like the idea of changing them, because, hey, it's just the heritage of the writer leaking though, and that shouldn't be a bad thing right? As long as everyone understands what they're saying anyway. At least that's the way I see it.

Also a question about the whole "..." thing. I see it in a lot of professionally made books, so it confuses me a lot when people have a problem with them online like this. ( I guess that was more a statement than a question)
I'm also not sure if I'd want to lose it, I like showing the hesitation in their voice when in the middle of dialogue. Admittedly your example, I can easily just say Twilight stayed silent (and I did make that correction to that effect) but when they're in the middle of talking to each other, and I want them to show hesitation without saying 'she hesitated' after every dialogue (because that would get far more tiresome to read than the '...') what would you suggest in its stead?

And the last, most vital question. You're going out of your way for me like this a lot lately, and I was wondering (if you had a mind to keep doing so anyway) would you like to help me edit a chapter before I release it?

[Frazzled Pony]

2757557

Well, it's nice that you can use some of what I say. I never expect people to take everything to heart, people always disagree on some of what I say, be it because they just love their own wording or because they are stubborn idiots. You can decide what you are yourself.

My only experience and training is reading a lot and writing sporadically, so I can't really be sure what defines a storyline. I thing it's the whole thing actually, while plot and subplots are the pieces of the overall narrative.

You're probably right with the multiple storylines, there are a lot of them, but my point was simply that you handle having a lot of them very well, without losing focus, meandering and getting boring. Also, this story is probably more of an ensemble story, so I don't think you can claim to have a main plot, everyone is trying to fly.

With the "this sounds right so go with it". That's probably correct in a lot of cases, being too strict will stunt your writing, but the things I point out are the places where the (at least to me) odd grammar jars me out of the story. And you should remember that we are a lot more casual with what we say than what we write.

In particular with the tense issues: To me, the fic needs to have a "main tense", be it past or present. If you write in past tense, then, to me at least, the only thing that should be in present tense should be statements that are still true (for the narrator) "at the time the story is being told".
If I write "Spike was walking through the streets of Ponyville. Ponyville is a nice town." That is correct, if Ponyville still is a nice town "at the imaginary time I tell you the story." However it gets nuked or everyone turns evil or something and it isn't reversed in the story, it ought to be "was".
And it obviously could be just as correct to just have the whole thing in past tense.
Aaaaarh, buck it, tense is really hard to make work, that's the reason I recommend sticking to one, because there is less risk of doing something that jars people out of the reading.

I have never seen "..." in professional writing and even if I did, I'd still be annoyed. I'm so set in my ways that I find issue with some of the methods of writing in A Song of Ice and Fire, so take that as you will. To me, "..." is just lazy writing. In general, any use of "...", be it in speech or descriptions or thoughts, annoys me and simply looks wrong and lazy. I subscribe to the notion "write your pauses".

"I am the definition of an amateur writer, actually, I might not even be counted as that!" That's horseshit. You're a great amateur writer, far superior to at least half of the fics here, but that's because people have depressingly low standards for what they decide to put up. You're not perfect and I've seen better, but you are in the top 25%, if not top 10%.

As for beta-reading: Well, I end up droning on and on when I comment anyway, so sure, I can check your chapters before you put them out for all to see. I just can't be expected to always be there right away, but I'll gladly do it.

Happy writing.

[Shokinaw]

2759866
- I like stubborn idiot, it suits me better.

- The search continues for the main plot! Seriously, I cannot for the life of me write a good description to the story because there's just way too much going on.

- Thanks again, explaining the tense thing will probably be very helpful, and I'll try to keep it in mind. It'll just be difficult because it flows so naturally to me no matter how wrong it is.

- We'll probably be at odds over the "..." stuff, though I'll try to write away from it for now on for your benefit. No promises though, the characters often write their own conversations. I can say I'll toss it out the door outside of dialogue for sure though.

- I don't know how to respond to compliments well, so I'm just going to say what I think helped me a lot? Does that sound alright? The truth is, if I was going to write something I wanted to do it well enough that 'I' would like it. I decided to create an outline for every chapter, and when designing it I also researched some basic fundamentals of movie scripts and similar, and all the different 'parts' involved in telling a story. Along with that, I've read every wiki entry on all of the characters you see a lot of in this story. If I have any success, I contribute it mostly to the research and preparation before going in. (This is also why I despise it when my chapters get too long and split up, I put that outline together very carefully and deviating is kind of a kick in the pants)

- I'll toss you my next chapter before I post it then! That'll be awesome! PM me to let me know how you'd like it whether through email, or if you know how to work Google Docs, or however else you prefer. If you ever get really bored, there's like 8 chapters before these two that apparently need much in the way of work too!
Especially that first one since that is likely the worst chapter ever. >.>

[Shahrazad]

This story has been reviewed by: The Equestrian Critics Society

Story Title: Our Time to Fly

Author: Shokinaw

Reviewed by: Shahrazad

Our Time to Fly is a story about growing up. It’s also a story about friendships. And loss. And business. And it has a dash of comedy. And two dashs of romance. It has so many things competing for screen time, so many plot threads, that the entire tapestry is set to unravel at the seams. Our Time to Fly is really more like three stories (or more) rather than a single, cohesive piece.

Full Review

Score: 5.5/10

[Shokinaw]

2809319
Well summarized!
In fact, it's so well summarized, I kinda want to quote it for my story description. Would you allow it?

Though I still think there's actually more than 3 story lines going on myself, but everyone keeps going to that number without being able to say which is which. Do you, by chance, know a better way to differentiate a story line plot from a side plot?

The pacing is pretty slow considering all the things that are going on at once, I suppose. Never had a complaint about it before now, though. If the only way to fix that is to retcon plots, no thank you. I love me some many intricate plots. Tis why I managed my way through the Wheel of Time and Sword of Truth novel series so easily. A slow pace is the suffering for the other interesting things going on. I get way too bored by a story with only one thing going on myself, and usually end up asking "Where is every one else during all this?"
If there's any other way outside of destroying plots to help speed things up, I'd be glad to look into fixing it.

You make a good point about the lavender pony syndrome thing. I was under the impression that enough clever ways to disguise pony names would destroy the repetitiveness, I've never heard of actually 'wanting' a repeat of names, so I'll keep it in mind with the ending chapters of 11,12, and 13. After which I'll go back and revise the previous ones and their sentence structures. Despite the many plotlines, I'm actually on the last leg of the fic. Chapter 12 will be the climax, and 13 the conclusion. At least this is a fix that's possible to repair. Cutting out plotlines would rip the poor fic asunder.

"There are a couple of decisions made by characters that seem to do nothing more than increase tension and drama."
That right there, believe it or not, is the part that saddens me most about the review. I'm sure the other parts are killer for you, but agreeing to disagree is part of life. I don't suppose you could tell me where their decisions stuck out as weird to you? Most of my concentration has been in attempt to keep the characters in synch with themselves, and to annihilate these kind of issues. Call it a pet peeve as you like, but this kind of thing coming out of left field can kill a story for me so easily.

I am 'very' surprised to find out that Pee Wee is the cannon break for you. For me it's the fact that Twilight isn't an alicorn, and Rainbow Dash kicking it at the Wonderbolt Academy she probably wouldn't have been able to enter if this fic had happened. I mean, the Pee Wee thing was like a 5 second pan at the first of an episode, where the entirety of an episode was devoted to Rainbow Dash being awesome, and the big finale was devoted to Twilight's alicorness! But it was the phoenix chick that broke it for you? I think we have different priorities.
( I suppose I shouldn't need to explain, but might as well, this response is already super long anyway) Season 3 wasn't out yet when I started this fic, I've tried to incorporate what I could from it, but needless to say, there are definitely some areas of episodes I had to ignore to keep writing.

All in all, thank you for the time you devoted to reading this, and really all the fics that come under your review. It's bound to be time consuming, and time is a very precious gift; one that should not be taken or given lightly. Know that I haven't taken it lightly and that I have appreciated you going through this for me. If this story is beyond repair, I'll remember it for my next ones at the very least.

[Shahrazad]

2819018

Quite a lot to respond to here and I'm working on a laptop while out of town. I will try to be brief.

You can use the summary, but may I suggest writing your own? You know better than anyone what the story is trying to say.

As I see it there are 3 main story lines and a few subplots. This is judged mostly by how long it takes to resolve these plots, how much screen time they get, and how much they impact the story as a whole. Differentiating isn't necessary. Subplots take up screen time as well, so if they don't contribute to the story, you should leave them out (next time).

I wouldn't retcon plots/story either. It's just something to keep in mind as you write more/your next story. As a rule of thumb the more plots you have the slower your story will go.
Two plots works well.
Three plots will cause some waiting, especially if all three are main plot threads.
Four plots or more will probably break the story down into waiting.

If you want to improve pacing, read up on "Show vs. Tell." Writers are often told, "show, don't tell" but should be told, "show the important parts and tell the rest." This is a complex subject that I cannot do justice in a tiny comment, you'll have to read up on it. Ezn wrote a guide that might help (hint hint).

I don't want to devolve into an argument, so I will give one example of a "drama decision" and try to show why it isn't really a problem. Rarity moves to Canterlot to increase her business, leaving her friends behind. We have an entire cannon episode about how important it is to remember where you come from. Again, this whole thing is O-K. If the characters didn't do these things there wouldn't be any drama/story to tell. It doesn't hurt the story so long as the decisions are plausible (which yours all are). If it really bugs you, give them a reason to do whatever it is you need them to do. This goes for cannon breaks as well, so long as they aren't over the top you can just do some hand waving and the audience along with our willing suspension of disbelief will go with you. We're cool like that.

I don't think your story needs "repair" as that implies it's broken. It isn't broken, there are just things it can do better.

Good luck, and keep writing.

[Shokinaw]

2825641
Your advised reading was quite informative, and I enjoyed it. Ezn's guide gave a lot of good advice that the EqD's guide did not, I'll look forwards to keeping the newly attained knowledge in mind.

I'm still not sure if I agree with the whole 'multiple story lines' trope as a bad thing, as most of the shows I've ever enjoyed had often far more than two, as well as novels that kept me interested. Perhaps what I need to do is find a way to better implement it, rather than getting rid of it. Maybe better designed story archs that focus on one or two at a time, and sink into new ones as the others end.

I guess we seen that episode a bit different. I looked at Rarity's trip to Canterlot as a lesson that you should never forget one's heritage and friends, which of course is perfectly true, But trying to say 'don't move away' seems unrealistic compared to most of the other lessons they presented us with. Rarity's story line in my fic is trying to balance both, advancing her work, and keeping in touch with her friends.

Summaries. Blarg. I think that's the worst part about having this many plot lines is trying to come up with one. I'm on like my 7th attempt and to show everything that's happening in a few lines tends to get all into existentialism just to be broad enough to encompass everything that happens. I try to avoid the over dramatics with spots of humour, and I can't really do that in description and still keep it short enough. I will give it, yet, another attempt.

Thanks for taking the time to respond, I wasn't actually expecting it. Keep on making stories better, it will not go unappreciated.

[Fury of the Tempest]

'Where you see worthless, I see an unending amount of opportunity'

You know, hope we have more development from this... if Diamond Tiara actually starts working with them instead of against them, they would be unstoppable.

[Shokinaw]

3379177
As you have read, more has indeed come from this, you sly, side plot noticing reader you!
And there'll be more to come in the final chapter! Tiara still has a part yet to play!

[djthomp]

Interesting details regarding Snips and his clothing line. Makes sense that Ponyville would be a better market for working clothes than high fashion.

Also an interesting direction to take with Diamond, I've been hoping all story long that she would end up with some additional depth (I've been really hoping that her taunting and the series of bets were going to turn out out to be her slightly messed up approach to encouraging Scootaloo). It occurs to me that if her plans are for a tour, Scoots winning the competition isn't really incompatible with that even if it means she wins the bet and Diamond loses.

[Shokinaw]

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I'm glad you also think so too! Of course, the main reason it was introduced was to get Rarity thinking about how supply and demand differs from place to place that she might come up with her business plans to save the farm.

She's a sly one, that Diamond Tiara. But I say not a word more, lest spoilers come a calling.

[Hekate Sketch]

He was a follower, not a leader, and he liked it that way.

huh, that sounds oddly a lot like me. I may be in JROTC, but that doesn't mean I want to be the one ordering people around. Social Anxiety sucks, but I just don't want all the attention being squad leader gets me.

[Shokinaw]

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I don't know many that are naturally inclined to lead. Following is way easier. The most important thing to me is having the courage to step up to the plate and take command in spite of that.

[DarkDMan]

That was one amazing chapter! All except Diamond being a royal bitch, but every plot and sub-plot was on point! Now only if they would listen to their elders like they are suppose to than at least one of to of their new problems would be solved.

Love the feels between; Spike and Twilight, Dash and Scootaloo, and The Apple Family. Even if the later one just pissed off their youngest member.

That's two members gone, and one to go.

[Shokinaw]

3562038
It is Diamond Tiara's way. Forgive her, she knows exactly what she does. (Wait, I don't think that's how that expression is supposed to go... ah well)
*raises glass* To feels and farewells! And wherever they lead us!