• Published 4th Jan 2013
  • 3,682 Views, 126 Comments

Collide - KitsuneRisu



One can fall in love just as easily as they can fall back out again. But when Applejack and Rarity are trapped in the middle of nowhere, only fate itself can intervene and cause two separate stories to come mingling into one.

  • ...
12
 126
 3,682

The End

Chapter 3

Weather on the plains was funny.

For the most of it, populated areas had weather that was monitored and controlled by the Pegasus committee, and as a result, problems were kept to a minimum.

But the Pegasi didn't fly this far out to the middle of nowhere, where the ground grew dry, thirsty, and cracked from the lack of moisture.

It was only due to rogue clouds like these – which were more common than one would think – that the plains got any rain at all. They flew around roughshod and unguided, being pushed around only by the wind. It was only when they flew close enough to a settlement to cause alarm, would the weather Pegasi take care of it.

The cloud had only just made a pass, but already, the ground was once again dry and crumbly under Applejack's hooves.

The soil sucked it up, and drank heavily of it, happy to be refreshed after weeks of naked sun.

Applejack hoped that their disappearance had been noticed by the ponies on the train, although it was rather unlikely. Once their tickets were punched, for the most, there was no further monitoring required. They certainly didn't take care to note who had got off the train. At the very least, she had hoped Rarity's insane amount of luggage would have caused some heads to turn at the Ponyville station, and hopefully somepony'd remember and wonder why all that luggage wasn't there at Dodge.

But it was a stretch, and a humble bunch of wishful thinking.

If she remembered correctly, the next train from Ponyville to Dodge was in two days, which meant at the very least, it would take two days for her friends to realise something was wrong and come looking.

Twilight would probably ask the questions, investigate what might have happened, and come to the conclusion that they had dropped off the train during the breakdown.

Pinkie would spur the others into action, eventually zeroing into the most logical choice of what to do accompanied by shouts and screams.

And Rainbow and Fluttershy would scour the area and spot them from a mile away…

That was the most likely scenario. Perhaps she was wrong and some help was on the way right now, but she had to prepare for the worst.

The cloud that was circling the perimeter of the town didn't make it any better. It was never safe to be out during a thunderstorm, and this one was as ferocious as they came. It crawled along the outer rim, displaying its teeth, ready to jump back in at any time and endanger anyone foolish enough to stand beneath.

It was for that reason that Applejack gathered as many plants and fruit as she could, stuffing her bags full of nourishing flora, and carried them back to the hut. By that time the sun had already made its way across the sky and it was long past mid-day.

To be fair, she had taken as much time as she could afford; she was still feeling the after-effects of yesterday's altercation. Applejack was one who wasn't that easy to anger, but was also one who found it hard to return from her voyages into extreme temper. It was a mix of her in-built stubbornness and an unwillingness to forgive herself for her own behaviour – it simply troubled her in a vicious circle in which her own annoyance at herself caused everything around her to set her off more easily than it normally would.

But the ever-present looming of the cloud had meant she needed to cut her breather short and return to the hut.

And it was time to face down her dread and head back to Rarity.

Somehow Applejack knew that there was going to be something waiting for her when she returned. Somehow she knew that she was going to have to face a truth that she didn't want to. Or was that 'couldn't'? Was there a difference anymore?

It'd been so long that it was hard to tell.

But each step became harder than the last, and that look upon her face showed all the more signs of struggle as the tiny little house loomed into view.

As she approached, she almost considered staying outside.

And as she entered, her heart sank.

Her heart sank at the gorgeous sight that unfolded before her.

Her heart sank at the candle that sat, lit, in the middle of the boxes in the center – except that they were now a table, weren't they? What with the white linen sheet stretched across the top.

Her heart sank at the two trunks that she had placed against either wall, except now they were beds, covered with layers of random clothing and topped with a small throw pillow each. Sure, they would be a squeeze, but they were definitely far more comfortable than the floor.

Her heart sank at the watertight building. In a pinch, Rarity was just as good at repairs as Applejack was. After all, mending clothing was far more technical than mending a hole in the wall, and the only reason why Rarity didn't do it more often was just because she didn't want to get her hooves dirty.

The candle flickered as the cloud billowed above, like a rushing wave travelling across the sky, plunging the day into night.

And immediately it brought the rain, which stayed outside.

And behind it all was the pony for whom her heart sank the most. She stood there, perfect as ever, in a frilled dress, studded with black stones and bordered with fancy lace. It was a glossy gossamer thing, and showed off Rarity's assets perfectly in compliment.

Applejack finally remembered to breathe.

"Well, Applejack," Rarity trilled triumphantly, "what do you think?"

"Oh, Rarity," Applejack whispered sadly, "why'd ya have ta do this…"

The sound of rain, at first sounding like paper being torn, but then later billowing up into a low-toned static, tore through the hut, as the candle flicked in the gently-moving air.

Damn it.

Damn it!

Teeth grinded against teeth while Applejack's brow furrowed into channels of stress and frustration.

"Applejack." Rarity pressed forward. She could see Applejack's reaction clearly, but she had come too far, and sacrificed too much. "I need to tell you something."

Applejack shook her head, frowning at her companion.

"I- I have made a gift for you, and…" Rarity said, her voice losing confidence by the second. Her sultry wavering tones degraded into pale shambles of their former self, and she ended up sounding like a choking bird.

A small package, wrapped up in spotted paper and tied with a huge bow was lowered to the space between them.

Applejack pushed it away.

"Rarity... please," Applejack said, her throat closing up. "I'm beggin' ya. Don't. I know what yer gonna say and I'm… I'm beggin' ya."

"I have to!" Rarity yelled, throwing the package down onto the table.

"No ya don't!" Applejack shouted back. "I know what this is about and… please! I'm askin' ya for both of our sakes, please don't say it!"

"Applejack," Rarity stated, drawing in her last breath and holding firm, her tone dropping to a harsh vocal imprint that echoed in the rain.

"Rarity…" Applejack sighed. She was beaten.

"Applejack, I love you."

The words rang in her ears, and she shut her eyes up tight, but even then, the flickering candle kept throwing shadows at her from out of the corners. She placed a hoof across her face in a vain attempt to stop her head from splitting open.

"Please, say something," Rarity asked, ragged breathing passing over dry lips. "Please."

But all that came to reply her was the water flowing off the roof.

"Please," she repeated. "Please!"

"What do you want me to say?" screamed Applejack, lifting her head and staring so deeply at Rarity that she jerked her head back in shock. "You think you can just say things like that and… and what? What were you even tryin' to do?"

"I…" Rarity muttered, in shock.

"Did you really think this was the best time?" Applejack kept yelling. "After all the manure you put us through? After all you did?"

"Applejack, please," Rarity begged, desperation creeping around the edges of her tone.

"No!" Applejack shouted. "Don't give me that! There ain't anythin' you can say, anythin', that's gonna explain yourself!"

"But I know you have feelings for me too, Applejack!" Rarity pleaded. "I just wanted it to be special for when I–"

"I had feelings, Rarity! I don't anymore!"

Above, a shot of thunder careened through the hut, charging the air with a flash of light and shaking the foundations of the building.

Rarity blinked, not fully recognizing the depth of what Applejack had said until she said it again.

"I… I don't love you anymore, Rarity," Applejack said, lowering her voice in a pale defeat. They were the words that both of them didn't want to have been put out. Even Applejack, for declaring it suddenly made them more real than all the times she had said it to herself in her head.

At least while they existed in her mind, they could still be denied by some part of her deep down. But now, they were out, heard, and real.

"I don't love you anymore," Applejack whispered, her eyes feeling heavy.

Rarity's head began travelling. The ever-present smile that she usually put on had long gone, and all that was left was her roaming eyes and shaking hoof, as it came up to her mane almost instinctively to push it out of her face. But even then, all it did was to upset it, as the strands of her hair came loose to fly free and out of control.

"Why?" Rarity asked the floor, meekly.

"Because you ain't the pony who I fell in love with no more," Applejack explained, shaking her head.

Rarity didn't say another word, sufficing herself to keep staring at that one spot on the floorboards.

"I don't know who you are anymore, and you don't know who I am," Applejack continued. "And that's the length and breadth of it."

"Of course I know you!" Rarity cried. "And surely you know me! We've known each other for years, Applejack, how could it be any different?"

"Yeah… that just proves that you don't at all. I've been payin' attention. I know you knew I fancied you back then, but over these last few months, you didn't notice that I stopped, did ya?

"Used to be you were just a prissy fashion queen with a bit of a haughty streak. We all knew you were just actin' like that. Now? You changed, Rarity. Changed into… something I don't recognize at all."

Once again, Rarity kept looking down. She knew exactly what Applejack was talking about. But yet, as the thought travelled through her mind and to her lips, she found herself saying something completely different.

"I haven't changed…" Rarity declared, softly.

"Stop it, Rarity. Just… stop it." Applejack sighed, face scrunched up. "That's just the thing. All this… stuff you say. All these things you do. If you knew me at all you'd know I don't care for none of these things. I hate all your runnin' around and evasion and all your pointless talk.

"I hate how you ain't never sorry for a thing you did in your life. I hate all your fakeness, Rarity. That ain't what I like about a pony. And it occurred to me you ain't gonna like a pony who ain't your kind neither. You ain't even apologized for strandin' us out here. In fact, you ain't even offered up a simple explanation as to why you were so plumb stupid as to leave the train in th' first place!"

"I did it for you!" Rarity suddenly burst out, her turn to let loose frustrations. Applejack didn't even flinch. She was too tired to. "I did it for you¸ okay?"

"How was any of this for me?" Applejack cried out in frustration.

"I wanted this to be perfect! I just wanted it to go perfectly for you! My mane was upset in the train and I needed a mirror! There weren't any on the train so I left! How was I to know that the train would be fixed so fast?"

"How were you to know? That ain't even the point! The point is you don't go runnin' off! Do you even have a single considerate bone left in your body?"

Rarity stamped the ground in frustration. But to whom the frustration was for was unclear.

"I don't care about your mane, Rarity. I don't care about all of… of this!" Applejack gestured to the room. "I don't care about make-up or dresses or how nice the room is. I don't care that you have a fancy present in nice wrappin'! It don't suddenly make things better! You just can't act the way you want all the time and expect other ponies to be okay with it later!"

"I…" Rarity muttered.

Say you're sorry.

Admit you're wrong.

"… I don't act like that," Rarity defied, a small tear running down her face.

"That's it." Applejack shook her head. "I can't take this anymore. Rarity, I'm sorry. But there ain't ever gonna be anything between us. You ain't the same pony no more."

Suddenly, panic returned, as another thundering crash rocked the skies above.

It was the same panic that threw Rarity every time she felt in danger. It was the same panic that controlled her. But this time it swung her in the opposite direction.

"No! Applejack! Please! O- okay! I'm sorry! I'm sorry, alright? Please, just give me… give me another chance, Applejack. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for leaving the train. I'm sorry for how I acted," Rarity begged, franticly, stuttering over uncontrollable breaths. She pushed past the table unsteadily, bumping into it as she approached Applejack.

Applejack moved away.

"Please! I'm sorry!"

"And you think I can believe that?" Applejack huffed, walking back around to the other side of the table and facing away.

"No, no, I am… I can be who you want me to be. Just tell me what it is, Applejack. I can…"

"No, you can't," Applejack spat out. "You can't just be who I want you to be! You either are or you ain't, and you ain't! You can be whoever you wanna be right now. It doesn't matter anymore. Just be the one who shows up their friends at the most important competition of their lives. Just be the one who steals gems away from baby dragons. Be the one who chases away her own sister. Your own sister, Rarity!

"You know who I fell in love with? It was that pony long ago who stayed up all night makin' dresses for the six of us just because she was kind enough t' do it. And now, you can't even make Twilight a birthday present because you're so wrapped up in your own business, and you didn't even have the guts to tell the truth about it!

"It's pretty obvious t' the rest of us who you wanna be, and… you know what? The one I fell in love with is gone. So you know what, I just don't care no more."

When Rarity looked back up, her heart couldn't help but clench at the sight of Applejack wiping streaks of tears away from her eyes. It was the truth that hurt the most. And through those tears did Rarity realise that nothing Applejack said had been easy.

And therefore it had been nothing but the truth.

You're useless. Once again, failing at everything. Causing problems because of your greed and your selfishness. It's no wonder that you aren't loved. She probably never loved you in the first place.

Rarity shook her head, clenching her eyes tight to drive away the phantoms. But she couldn't hide behind a laugh any longer. The smiles just wouldn't come out.

Yeah, that's right. Little Rarity, all alone, as usual. Useless filly. Never once could you stand by yourself. Why not just pretend like nothing's wrong, like you always do? Why not just indulge in yourself like you always do? That always makes you feel better, doesn't it?

Hiding. That's all it had ever been about. Each disgraceful action leading to the next, all in an attempt to hide.

Look, see how you broke her heart? Look at what you've done.

Applejack stood there, trying to keep a brave face, but with every blink she gave, more and more tears ran down, and those tears told the whole story.

How are you ever going to get out of this one? Rarity, you selfish, selfish…

Rarity took a step back, not understanding what she was doing.

And then she swung around, wrenching the door open without a second's thought. Her mind had emptied itself from everything except the words that kept shouting at her, and Rarity tore through the wind and the rain, pushing out into the fall and disappearing into the darkness, all in but a flash.

"Rarity!" Applejack gasped, turning around at the sound and scrabbling towards the door. She winced as she came down hard upon her injured ankle again, but flew out the opening in an effort to keep up.

And for the second time in those two days, she was on the chase for her friend, who had taken off without a single word of warning.

Each drop hit so hard that it hurt, especially the ones that pelted her in the face and the eyes. The scattered dust got into her nose and throat, and the damp only made it harder to rid it from her face.

She pulled her ragged Stetson down a bit more, but the brim was already wavering in the wind, and the rain poured through the hole, and while it could keep a bit of the wet out of her eyes, it wouldn't help her if she was struck by lightning.

The bolts came every few seconds. Not all of them hit the ground; most of them were content jumping around inside of their host. But one might, at any time, and they were likely to hit the tallest thing standing up on the flat, flat plains.

"Rarity!" Applejack shouted again, over the storm, as the howling pushed both her words and her body aside effortlessly.

But she had to walk. She had to press on. The cold of the night helped to relieve some pressure off her swollen leg, but it still prevented her from running at full speed. All of her strength was put into fighting back the storm.

And she trudged onward, not bothering to yell any longer.

There weren't many places to run off to in this settlement, and most of them were incredibly dangerous indeed. But with a limited number of choices, Applejack made a guess and pushed toward the pond.

Like a world shrouded in veils, the darkness only lifted in a small area around Applejack. Everything else was impossible to see past a certain distance, but as she approached her destination, a familiar ghostly figure was revealed by the side of the pond, soaking wet and immobile.

Applejack stopped for a moment; a foolish gesture driven by instinct.

And suddenly did Rarity move, swiftly, and viciously. Applejack saw her silhouette grab at the lapels of her dress and tear at it, pulling as much as she could, and even using her magic to finally rip it off her back. It was no easy feat, especially now that it had been drenched right through.

She threw it to the ground and stamped on it, yelling inaudible threats against the horrid thing, before finally flinging it into the pond where it was swallowed by the bubbling darkness.

Her hair fell over, plastered to her head in strands that stuck together, and in the frequent explosions that came from above, Applejack saw her rub at her face, hard, fast, as if she were trying to claw it off. She held her hooves to her head, and finally lay it down at the water's edge, curled up in a weak, pathetic ball.

The thunder that crashed shocked Applejack back to life.

She blinked, as the image finally cleared in her mind, and she tore forward again, pressing past the curtain of rainfall and landing on top of Rarity's back.

She had to. Keeping low was important, and it was the only way her voice could penetrate the insulation of weather.

"Get off me!" Rarity screamed, struggling and slipping along the bank into the pond.

"Rarity! You have t' come back! Ya gotta get outta this storm!" Applejack pleaded, curling a leg around her neck and yanking her out of the water.

The ground ran with mud.

"Just leave me!" Rarity wailed, too far lost in her emotions to make any sense. "I have nothing left! Let me be!"

"Yer gonna die out here, Rarity!"

"S- so be it!"

"Rarity! Come back and let's talk about it, alright? Please!"

A bolt of lightning flashed in the sky, followed by a rumbling that was directly overhead. It shook the ground and caused Applejack to duck out of terror.

"Rarity!"

"N-no! You hate me!" she sobbed, lowering her head back into her legs.

There was no time. There was no argument. Applejack, fighting against her injured leg, fighting against the struggling form of Rarity, hefted her up onto her back, where she lay there like a stuffed doll, finally giving up her resistance and letting Applejack have her way.

And step by agonizing step, she carried Rarity back to the hut.


Applejack deposited her onto the ground, roughly, panting from lack of breath and lack of air. She could have drowned on the way back with how heavy the rain was, and it was only through an absolute stroke of luck that they weren't injured by lightning on the way home.

All Rarity could do was cover her head, sopping and wet, with her front legs and curl up into a ball.

Applejack too, dropped to her knees to take that chance to rest, where she landed heavily behind Rarity.

For a moment, all she could see was the un-rhythmic rise and fall of Rarity's shoulders as she breathed.

The open door had put out the candle while they were gone, and they both lay there in the darkness, neither speaking nor moving.

But she had to be the one, didn't she?

She had to take the first step. It was the right thing to do. The honourable thing to do.

At least Applejack knew how to follow through when she felt guilty.

"Listen, Rarity," Applejack finally said, after a few moments of gathering up her confidence, "I'm sorry about what I said just now. I guess I was just angry."

The puddles of water that flowed off their bodies drained down the floorboards.

"I mean… I was really mad, Rarity. Not on purpose, but… I'm really confused too. I really did use to have feelings, and it just hurt when I had to hear those words comin' from ya. I… I just reacted badly. I just wish…"

Applejack cut herself off. There wasn't anything she could really say at this point. Nothing she said would change anything.

I mean, what could she wish for? That Rarity had said it earlier? And then what? They'd have gotten together and it would have hurt even more that she'd change in front of her.

What else? She could wish that Rarity hadn't changed this much, but in the end, she just had, and that was the end of that.

Wishes were just that. Wishes.

They never came true, and you can't change the nature of a pony.

The voice that came after that short pause of silence came as a surprise in how different it sounded.

There wasn't a sing-song quality to it. There were no melodic chirps or accentuations. There was just Rarity, weak, sad, and thoroughly lost to herself.

"I know," the voice said, from the shadowy figure that lay just in front of Applejack.

It was Applejack's turn to deny a response.

"I know I've been changing," said the voice, with a level of purity; stripped of all farce. "That's why I needed you so badly."

"Me?" Applejack asked.

"Yes. I... I suppose it's silly now, to think about it."

"But?"

"But you were always the one I wanted to be."

"You wanted to be me?"

"In a way, I suppose."

"I don't… understand, I'm sorry."

Rarity shifted slightly, pushing her face a bit deeper into her legs. It made her a bit more muffled, but no less honest.

"It's why I like you so much, Applejack," she said, the tears in her voice apparent. "I- I just… you were always everything I wasn't. I couldn't… I just knew…"

Applejack looked toward her hooves, guiltily. She wasn't sure why.

"Oh, A- Applejack, I'm so so- sorry," Rarity sobbed. "I've been an ab… absolute beast."

"Naw, you… you haven't," Applejack replied, answering from her heart instead of her mind.

"Yes, I have. I know I have. I've always known. I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry."

"It's… it's okay."

"I thought… I felt comfortable."

Applejack pondered on this for a while, the moments passing before she finally decided to ask.

"What do you mean?"

"With you, Applejack. I felt comfortable with you. Only when I was around you I felt… brave. I felt confident. Because you were. Because of how truthful you are. I need you, Applejack. You're kind… and loving… and everything I wish I could be again.

"I know I made such a mess of things. I know this is all my fault. But… I needed tonight to go perfectly. Because if it didn't…"

"What, Rarity? What would happen?"

"I mean… what do I do now? Without you… I don't think I can ever improve."

"Rarity… that… that ain't a good reason to love somepony. Don't you get that? You can't just love me because I'm somepony you want to be. It's more than that. It's about understandin' the one you wanna be with. It's about knowin' the one you love. Pretendin' just ain't good enough. And that's why it ain't gonna work out."

"I don't know who I am anymore, Applejack. I don't know the pony I'm turning into. And without you… what do I do now?"

"You just… get better. You don't need me for that. Like I said, that ain't the reason why two ponies should get together. We'll help you. All of us will. But… maybe a relationship just ain't gonna work out."

The hiss of rain continued to shower over the roof, and there in the near-pitch darkness, they both fought back the cold.

"But I still want it," Rarity said, sadly. "I still want it."

"Why, Rarity?"

"I… I don't know."

The door creaked, fighting back the wind.

"Rarity?" Applejack asked, after a pause.

"Yes?"

"Can I see your face?"

"W…why?"

"I just want to. Please. Let me just look at you for a while."

Rarity didn't stir. She didn't move to reveal herself, but didn't oppose Applejack when she gently lay a hoof on her shoulder and rolled her around.

Her pale, white face, now free from makeup, looked away from Applejack, eyes averted in some kind of shame. Her mane pressed flat against the sides of her face due to the wetness, and she looked not one iota less plain than any other pony to be found anywhere in Ponyville.

Applejack bit her lip.

Rarity blinked, a long blink, her eyes remaining shut for a few seconds before they fluttered open again to reveal her perfect eyes, unframed by false lashes or her traditional blue mascara.

A stone was cast down Applejack's throat, and it landed neatly upon her heart. It weighed it down with a thousand tons, and once again she found herself wishing for things that wouldn't happen.

The pale, white beautiful face turned, saddened, burying itself once again behind a cage of legs.

Why, Applejack would have asked.

Because I can't bear for you to see me this way, Rarity would have replied.

No words were said. None were needed. The actions and the sentiment were clear.

Applejack knew that Rarity still didn't get it.

It was that mascara-free face, those pure eyes and that innocent expression that Applejack wanted most of all, and it was those things that Rarity thought she hated.

It was that one instinctual need to hide that part of herself away. In that, Applejack knew that the Rarity she loved would always be hidden.

"Is there really nothing between us?" Rarity tried, one last time, muffled words through tear-stained flesh.

One last time did she attempt.

One last time did she ask.

And one last time did Applejack shake her head.

"I'm sorry," she repeated. "I just don't think you know who I am."

Rarity nodded, no longer troubled by it. She'd hit that point where she just wanted to confirm it again, and she didn't feel burdened by the answer.

"Then… we should get some rest," Rarity said, pushing herself up to her hooves. "I… I prepared a bed for you. You may use it as you wish."

The Unicorn walked to her own trunk, full of dresses and shirts and padding that stood in for a mattress. It was rather spacious, and Rarity found no trouble in huddling up against the far side, burying her head in the swathes of cloth.

Applejack just stood there watching. Looking at Rarity as she climbed in, thinking of things as she huddled up with herself.

Theirs were two lives set apart. It was a strange sort of circumstance that caused them to miss each other coming down opposite directions on the same road. Perhaps if she had been part of Rarity's life a little earlier… or perhaps if Rarity hadn't changed…

Maybe they might have collided.

Applejack wasn't against the idea.

She would have loved to be in love once more.

But if Rarity only wanted her because of arbitrary reasons… that wasn't real. There wasn't anything about this that was real. Not the mistake that caused the mess to this 'room' they were in. Not the presentation given earlier to the kerchief that Rarity had tied around her ankle.

Everything was dressed in fraudulence and fakery.

And just as Applejack had said earlier, there was one truth that she believed in. You can't change the nature of a pony.

Rarity had gone too far, and lost too much. The burden of herself had warped her into who she was now, and there was no going back.

This truth was what hurt Applejack the most.

And she wished. She wished.

She wished for some trace. She wished for some sign.

It was Applejack's turn to reach for the answers she already knew.

Not a single trace of the old Rarity was left. Not a single piece remained.

Oh, but how I wish there were.

At her hooves lay the present that Rarity had given, in its obscenely bright wrapping paper and its gaudy bow.

Applejack kicked at it.

At the very least… maybe.

She picked it up and put it on the table, the soft paper rustling as she placed it there and stared at it.

Well… it was the thought that counted, Applejack supposed.

She dug into the package, tearing off the paper, and taking full view of what Rarity had given her.

And for a minute, the rain took over her world.

"Applejack?" Rarity asked, in the darkness, the showers from above cascading down.

"W-wh-ut?" Applejack replied.

"Are you crying?"

"N- no, y'-y'-y'idiot! I-I ain't cry… uh…"

She couldn't finish her sentence.

She'd already taken the necessary few steps toward Rarity, and without even thinking, pushed her roughly aside, forcing herself onto the narrow bed.

And she threw her legs around her friend, as silent tears fell upon Rarity’s cheek.

"What's wrong?" Rarity whispered, laying there in the darkness, too stunned to move.

"I… I made a wish," Applejack burst out tearfully, burying her face into Rarity's shoulder, her words intermingling with heartfelt sobs that came from the deepest part of her heart.

On the floor lay the hat that Rarity had made. It was a plain, simple hat, in brown leather, exactly like what Applejack wore, and exactly how she liked it. It was a full replacement of the worn-down, old, tattered hat that she currently had, and not a single thing was changed in the design.

You couldn't change the nature of a pony.

Not at all.

And perhaps Rarity hadn't.

And in that, Applejack held Rarity tighter, sniffing, and soon Rarity joined in too, not even needing a reason why.

Together they lay, shaking and shuddering, and crying over laughs, not speaking a word, but each completely understanding what they were trying to say.

And in each other's embrace they stayed, until the tears finally ended.


Two Days Later

The speck turned into a tiny bit of blue, and that tiny bit of blue turned into a Rainbow Dash. Her multicoloured trail was easily recognizable, and before she even reached the town, Applejack and Rarity had already seen her.

Rainbow must have seen them too, as she slowed and banked down, flying past houses with finesse and depositing herself straight onto the dirt right in front of the pair.

"There you are!" Rainbow exclaimed. "We've been looking for you for ages! Lady Jubilee told us you never arrived, and the train ponies didn't remember ever seeing you two leave the train! So Twilight checked out the train roster, and guess what? She noticed your train broke down and figured something must have happened!"

Applejack quirked an eyebrow, smiling to herself.

"A- and!" Dash went on, landing next to Rarity and Applejack. That's weird. Rarity was wearing Applejack's hat. She never did that.

"And then Pinkie started yelling about finding you because you might be starving or dead or…"

"Sounds 'bout right," Applejack chuckled, giving Rarity a kind of glance, who responded with a titter of her own.

"And so Fluttershy and I took off and headed to find you! I hit the skies and well… I saw you from the ridges down south!"

"Where's Fluttershy?" Applejack smiled.

Rainbow returned that with a frown. "Um… I don't know! I lost her three miles ago!"

Applejack laughed.

Those were her friends, alright, and she loved every single one of them. She knew them so well, and she could always tell exactly how things were going to turn out.

And the one that she knew least of all?

Well, that was a whole new adventure, just waiting to happen.

Rarity beamed.

"So… are you guys okay?" Rainbow asked. They seemed to be far happier than she would have thought, having been stuck together in the desert for three and a half days.

"We're just fine, Rainbow. We got a lot of luggage to ship outta here, but we're fine."

"Oooh, yes, and that nasty old cloud over there has been tormenting us to no end!" Rarity chipped in.

Same old Rarity. With her perfect hair and her made up face.

But she nodded that made up face to Applejack, who looked back with a new kind of outlook.

Rarity was who she was. In the end, they'd talked about it a bit more, and it was unfair for Applejack to completely strip Rarity of everything that made up who she was. But all that Applejack required was for Rarity to realise who she was… where it counted.

Besides, if Applejack had to tell the truth, under less stressful situations, that playfully poised side of Rarity wasn't all too bad. It was a little bit… alluring, sometimes, and maybe Applejack could get used to it in small portions.

But in the end, it was still Rarity on the inside whom she loved, and she was going to stand by her to make sure that she never lost track again.

Applejack leaned into Rarity for a moment, taking in a breath as her smell filled her mind.

"Uh… what's going on?" Rainbow asked. "Am I… missing something here?"

"We have a lot t' tell you," Applejack said.

"And I have a lot I need to say." Rarity nodded, humbly.

"But th' two of us?" Applejack mentioned cryptically, to an ever-more-confused Rainbow, giving her a wink and a smile.



"I think we're gonna be just fine."

The End

Comments ( 113 )

I'll give this a read sometime
Even if it kills me:pinkiehappy:

I dont know if i should i read this.:applejackunsure: on your front page you said this was a hate fic right?:fluttershysad:

1904144
I was kidding. It's 'hate' because it's it's a romance born out of friction rather than lovey dovey stuff. It has... a satisfying ending, though. Bit different than my normal things, but... yeah! It's fun. I hope.

1904141
Yes. DIE! DIE!!! MUAHAHA!

Edited by the traitorous AppleDasher, TheShadow...?
I'm not sure whether to feel proud for editing something besides AppleDash or insulted...:applejackunsure:
But hey, it was a different reading experience for me, so yeah, good job on this Kit you silly pony :twilightsmile:

Oh... my... god.... This instantly takes a slot in my "The Faves of The Faves" box, no questions asked. I just, my feels, you... you broke them. At first, to be completely honest with you, I thought this was a remake of "Swayback Mountain"; which was alright, but this. This was something else. This was just... perfect. So much detail, it wasn't rushed in the slightest bit; you paced everything absolutely perfectly and the characters were portrayed so on-point, I could literally imagine every moment of this in my head with no struggle whatsoever. Other stories; it's not easy for me, but this... You see, you had detail, but not so much that it was overwhelming and boring. I often find stories with either too much or too little. Such a shame. It's close to impossible in finding something perfect like this. And the dialogue was just completely in character, sometimes, you can often find a point or two in a story where things go a bit OOC. There wasn't any of that in this. Fabulous. Just... yes. Thank my notifications for letting me know that this amazing fanfiction was added to the Rarijack folder, or I might have wasted my half hour listening to The Script and trying to write LyraBon. I just... despite, this long review, I must say, there are literally no words. I am breathless at how this story turned out. I also thank you, dear author, for writing it. This is like a late Christmas present for me. It made my week.

1904158
Oh i see thats cool,:twilightsmile: well i finished reading it and wow just wow i liked it. it was totally something different from what i have read before on this ship.:pinkiehappy:

1904209
Insulted. Definitely insulted.

1904220
Hi, my princess. =3 Honestly, I think your review is better than the fic. :twilightsheepish: Well, I'd never read swayback mountain before... but I'm glad I didn't accidentally write a total clone :derpyderp1: And I'm really exalted that I managed to at least make one person happy with this. =) Honestly, I'd been working on this so long I had no idea if I had something good or incredibly stupid... let's just say that I'm happy it's worked out in the end. Just like Rarity and AJ. *insert cheesy love music*

1904224
That's what I always try to do! I like being different. =)

1904321 Oh, pssh, you're being silly. My review was not better than this fic. You're talented, ok? TIME TO CHECK OUT THE REST OF YOUR STORIES!

1904339
I think you already read One Day, didn't you? I saw you comment there if I recall!

1904354
Cheers mate =D

I'm running out of metaphors... =(

1904356 You wrote that? Huh. Must've slipped my mind.

1904365
Yeah I did! =) It's ok, though. I tend to slip into the background a lot. hahaha!

1904372 You are now the owner of fics 93-98 that I have on my Read Later list. :twilightblush:

1904377
sheesh, lol
Thanks! I'm not sure the others will appeal because I write... very wildly different things, but you'll be able to see my style in each of them, I think. Also by now I think you know I like to sort of turn things around throughout the stories... good luck, and thanks ever so much for the support. =)

1904389 You're very welcome. :pinkiehappy: A talented writer like yourself deserves such praise.

Wow... :rainbowderp: this was really well done fanfic! And I really liked the issues that Applejack touched that felt untouched in the show. Kind of made the characters grow even more. The middle part of the story and especially the last part of the story really played with my emotions :fluttercry: and I was really conflicted about Rarity.

Well written story! And the fact that this is a RariJack ship fic makes me even more happier :pinkiehappy:
Well done!

Welp, that was an enjoyable read. In the first two chapters, it was fun piecing together just exactly what the two characters were feeling, and what their motivations were. By the time you're entering the third chapter, it's like watching two trains inevitably crash into each other, and all you can do is stand in awe and witness the explosive aftermath.

Will they work out together? Maybe... maybe not, but what matters is that Applejack took that necessary plunge.

Good story, will read again.

Simply lovely. :pinkiehappy:

This story was amazing. The characterization really blew me away. Most writers just pick one personality for Rarity and go with it, but you balanced both sides of her in a beautiful way that captured the hypocrasy of her character. I found myself getting frusterated along with Applejack at how fake she was being. I'm seriously worried that you have permanently altered my thoughts on Rarity to the point that I will always question her character in other fic I read. That sounds bad, but I think its a good thing in a way that I can't place.

As for Applejack, you highlight ed the complexity of her character just as well. What impressed me the most was the ending. You actually took the tough road of leaving Rarity's character flaws unresolved, which makes me happy in a sad sort of way. Having her change completely would have felt fake after the amazing character buildup leading to the ending.

Sorry for rambling, just know that this is beautiful.

Nice job, a well written story even if I thought the drama was a little over the top there at the end.

I think it needs a sad tag, and I also think you should write a lot more shipping stories.

Keep it up. :twilightsmile:

This is a beautiful piece of writing artwork; a pantheon of emotional gamut wrapped in a believable premise and executed appropriately. This is precisely why I read KitsuneRisu and follow him; there are those who try, like myself, and those who accomplish - this is an infectious tease into a creative nuance I have yet to perceive. The technical opulence intermingled with the heartwarming evolution marries together in a very impassioned, believable way.

Bravo, and encore. Well done.

This is the story you were telling me you couldn't get the tone to come out right for? :ajbemused: Man, you could tune a flippin' orchestra to the tone you set here! This was beautiful. Just... beautiful. Your take on Rarity was fresh and interesting, and the way AJ handled it, and the stellar-as-all-of-your-stories descriptions, and the intensity of emotions, and... just... yeah. This was good pony words, friend. Good pony words.

1908071
Mainly because after the 2nd rewrite I lost ALL MY OBJECTIVITY. Up until now I still can't see anything in it. It's like... looking at it through a dull cloud of poopy gas. It's the problem that in my head, along with this finished product, I have the essence of the past 4 rewrites still in there, so everything is sort of jumbled up into a mess. But I guess it worked out in the end! I'm glad I made the changes, and I was worried because I can't tell a shit if it's good or not on my side. After a month it'll probably clear!

1904456
Thanks =D If I can make people feel something from the tale, that's all I need. To feel and think. :raritywink: <- She'll get better! :ajbemused: <- She'll one day be happy.

1905123
Already told you this but thanks for the comments. The original title of this was 'Masks' but I think this fits better for the analogy eh?

1906964
Hey thanks for the insights! This was exactly what I set out to do. I was never a fan of the 'single layer' of characters... and in my romance fics I try to always have more than just the one motivation for anything. If I changed your perspective of Rarity... Muahahaha! =D Well, it's ok. That's how I see her in my own headcanon too. It's the only way I can see AJ tolerating her in the show's canon. And from the very start the idea was to leave things unresolved but hopeful. This fic is more like... the road leading UP to the romance rather than the actual romance itself. It's really just the beginning!

1907456
Which parts did you feel were overblown, exactly? I'd love to know so I can improve. =)
But I can't put a sad tag on this because it's not like... the fic isn't meant to set out to make people sad. The sadness comes from the hope and second chances and I think that's the opposite of sad! =) Even though it plays with the same feelings... :twilightsheepish:

1907699
*opens dictionary* uh huh :twilightoops:

1908123

You carried the rejection a little to far for it to be believable that Applejack would change her mind after opening the gift, no matter what it is.

This pushed a whole lot of my emotional buttons, including some I'm prepared to deny having in the first place.

1914939
I'm not sure... which emotions those could be... :twilightoops:

1914948
Let's just say I am entirely too familiar with the idea of a single act precipitating something that could reasonably be dubbed The Worst Possible Thing.

1914978
I... Um.. is that a good thing or a bad... thing... :derpyderp1: :derpyderp2:
What like... uh you were.. scared? :rainbowhuh:

1915012
You're talking to a man who's laughed in the face of death, sneered at doom, and chuckled at catastrophe.

I was petrified.

(I now owe several bits to the Wizard of Oz for stealing his routine.)

1915037
Are you sure you weren't reading a different fic? haha
But anyway, that's an interesting reaction. I definitely didn't intend to make people scared... But.. if it works for you. At least there's a hopeful ending huh? :ajsmug:

1915048
There is that. And as long as I'm swiping stuff from old MGM musicals, you may as well know this: one of our class activities when I was in high school, back in the Cretaceous period, was dropping in at a downtown theater which did first-runs at night and classics during the day.

The following is quoted from my personal nonpony site:

The trick about the town of Brigadoon, you may remember, is that it’s not always there: the enchantment that preserves it does so by bringing it to life only once every hundred years, thereby making sure it’s not influenced by contemporary evils. Which means that when Tommy Albright (Gene Kelly) falls hard for one of the town girls, he’s faced with the sort of choice you wouldn’t give Hobson: either he stays with her, thereby giving up his life in this world, or he returns to New York and never gets another shot. I remember yelling at the screen: “You fool! Go back to her!” (I saw the greatest minds of my generation garner detentions for just such breaches of conduct.)

Pretty much any romance story I've read since that day, and certainly any such story I've written, has been in some way influenced by that scene.

And "once every hundred years"? Make that once every thousand years and you've got yourself a Crystal Empire.

1915118
The hinge on the question... is a dire one. I'd actually admit that in pre-planning I never intended it to go this far, in fact. It wouldn't have ended on a complete failure, nor a pass, but somewhere inbetween; as if Tommy stands forever right on the border, sticking his head in and waiting for a sign. (I am very slightly familiar with Brigadoon. It was a classic, as I recall. Watched it when I was VERY young.)

Just like in the analogy. it'd probably not have worked. I cleaned it up in the future drafts, and made her turn around. I trust the scene was gripping enough that you rooted in favour of characters regardless of motivation, and I hope that the final choice was the right decision for me to have made.

:twistnerd:

1915176
I wouldn't have had it any other way. :yay:

I'll leave my kind sentiments too. I thought it was really good. The best rarijack I've ever read. I mean, you can convert some appledash shippers with this fic.

I believe everyone has expressed my thoughts in their comments, so I'll just post this:
25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m48ix4Jno41rwn89bo1_r1_400.gif

Holy shit. The final breaking point of AJ, I'll just say: "Feels ahoy!". This is an amazing fic, I congratulate you for this fine work of art. Time to read the rest of your stuff. :twilightsmile:

I'm still not quite sure what to think of this story, it was really good but something about it rubs me the wrong way and I'm not completely sure what that is. I know its not your descriptions, those are good enough to make me want to stop writing since I view mine as sucking. I'm guessing its how you handled Rarity, thinking back on it, allot of her actions seem like she only did them to drive the story, not because they made sense or really seemed like something she would do.

EXCELLENT. Superbly written; you captured the voices of the two characters very well.

I also enjoyed that you struck on my exact feelings for how Rarity has been acting, and how I feel she should be acting. Applejack's feelings and views on Rarity's selfishness and shallowness mirror my own almost perfectly.

And the ending? As much as I may dislike Rarity, knowing that she does truly have that spark of true goodness and generosity deep down only needing that breath of truth to rekindle it... that does redeem her.

I say again; superb. :twilightsmile:

1969752
Hm... well, I'm sorry you didn't enjoy it! Either way, thanks for giving it a shot too. If you ever figure out exactly what it was that you don't like, don't hesitate to tell me =) I'm afraid most of how I wrote Rarity in this fic was part of a modified character based on my headcanon, so her actions weren't that of what she would do in the show. Not exactly, anyway. But well, thanks for the honest feedback nevertheless!

1973987
I sincerely appreciate it. I sincerely need to pull a page out of your book, though! You have the best writing for 'pure' scenarios. :twistnerd: Never before had I read a Slice of Life fic that did that genre justice before I read yours. :twistnerd:

I have to learn how to integrate parts of that into what I write... hopefully that'll enrich my vapid scenes!

1974879

You miss understand, I did enjoy it but something about it still kinda rubbed me the wrong way so that I can't add it to my favorites to read at a later date. I think I'm getting a better understanding of what bugged me about it now too. I like the setup for the story, where its :duck: and :ajsmug: stranded in this odd deserted town near the tracks and have to come to terms with their feeling etc etc. I think the problem I had was just that everything comes across as :raritydespair: fault. I don't agree with what :ajsleepy: yelled at :raritycry: about but I can see it from a headcannon thing or whatever but the way they got stranded left something to be desired for me. I can see :raritywink: wanting to look her best for somepony shes hot for but her going out into the wasteland to fix her hair when that would result in other parts of her getting dirty doesn't work I think and it kinda sets the tone for the whole story as "its all Rarity's fault." I think simply having a different reason for them getting stuck or even it having been a plan by Rarity for them to get more alone time would have helped.
Actually I think having Rarity have planned this out a bit for them to get stuck might work best, there are a few hints in the story that make it seem like its going that way and if you did it that way then it would seem like like Rarity was just a damsel in distress and more like a character who knew what she wanted and was prepared to go to lengths to get it, combined with the ending where Rarity gives AJ the gift, would make it seem a bit more whole to me. As it stands now Rarity reminds me of a child character in a videogame, really just there to mess up and need to be rescued over and over. I think thats what rubbed me wrong about it.... I hope that made sense.

1975240
Hi! I absolutely get it! Thanks very much for getting back to me, in fact.
I see your point, and honestly, I hadn't considered the idea of her actually intentionally stranding themselves just to get alone time before.
Your time in explaining to me is very much appreciated. Thank you! =)

That was incredible. My metaphorical hat is off to you good sir and I am bowing low great job excellent. :heart:

Brilliantly characterized, and I can picture every scene and hear all the dialogue in my mind's eye without a hitch. I do agree that as written it leans toward "WTF was Rarity thinking?" but that's not necessarily a bad thing. The "gift opening" scene seemed a tad rushed considering the amount and intensity of angst that came immediately before it, and I'm not sure the Mane6 epilogue was necessary, or at least not as much of it. AJ's reflections on Rarity's character at the end redeemed that a good bit.

In the end it gets a big thumbs up and a gold star from me. As a writer of a little RariJack myself, I'll say - excellently done!

I liked your story. I think your scene creation at the end was spectacular. You had me giving up hope for both AJ and Rarity, but gradually if you see what I mean. I think that may have been aided by knowing roughly how long the chapter was supposed to be, but even so, I felt like something had to give right up until the moment where AJ confirms she has no feelings for Rarity. For you to have concluded those feelings at exactly the right moment was exemplary story telling. Then once I feel thoroughly upset by them not getting together, boom, open the gift.

You got me onside with the character's too! I was rooting for them, even though RariJack isn't a pairing I usually go for. I think you deserve recognition for that. The setup was a little confusing, but I liked where it went, so I'll forgive that. The pacing seemed very good and the weight of description/exposition/action was pretty spot on.

I only have one big concern overall - and I urge you not to dwell on it too much. That concern is language use and grammar. There were quite a few misused words (that is to say, right-click thesaurus moments), some incomplete participles and a few significant grammatical errors which forced me to reread sentences to properly understand their meaning from context. The reason I say not to dwell is that these pale in to insignificance when you have such a good story and such a fabulous creative mind. They're nothing a proof-reader couldn't fix.

But overall, for sheer enjoyment, I would give this story an 8/10 and I'll rate it up.

2403504
Hey man, I appreciate the feedback!

First of all, I'm happy you enjoyed the story, and thanks for the time spent to give such a detailed review.

Surely I won't dwell on the language use. Although in my defense, I actually tend to switch words often as part of my writing style, and it's something a lot of my longer-time readers already sort of got used to me about! Haha, Well. Usually when I say something I don't necessarily use the words that precisely send the meaning, but I use words that carry similar tones. Consider them as sort of... mini metaphors, if you will.

But of course, if there are genuine mistakes, then I put my hand up to them. Most of the 'weird use of words' though, are usually intentional and are there for poetic license, which may or may not work given the circumstance, but I'm rather a purpley writer of sorts. Perhaps if you gave me an example or two of some lines in which it stuck out a bit more for you and I'll take a look?

No! I'm not dwelling! I'm just saying because this fic had 3 proof-readers, and those 'errors' may have been intentional all along! Similarly to the grammatical and participle errors. I am well aware of certain rules, but I sometimes choose to ignore them, again, in favour of flow and poetry. I make use of things like asyndeton a lot, and they tend to look like run-on mistakes or comma splices.

However, what I don't like is if something is unclear to the point where you have to re-read things. So, I'd be concerned about those! Well, again, if you have any off the top of your head that you recall, I'd love to know them so that I might not make the same mistakes in the future of overly complicating the delivery.

Once again, thank you very much for the feedback, and please enjoy everything else I have to offer.

2403571 Oh no, now that you've said that I feel like I was questioning your style which is the last thing I'd want to do! Now that you say you were intentionally omitting conjunctions etc. I can actually see it. And since you're saying your using words for aesthetic reasons rather than particular meanings (at times), the right-click thesaurus comment seems to have been debunked too.

So as you've addressed my two big concerns, I have no real criticism. The rereading was to do with these two things because my mind was trained to read in depth more than it was to glean a definition/concept from the context of a paragraph as a whole. So when something looks odd to me, I naturally check that I read it correctly then I'll switch to the other style of reading to get what I need to from the paragraph.

So now that I consider it, perhaps it was my mistake! In any case, I'll try to have another read and see if there was anything that I was particularly confused by but also from the perspective of understanding what you were trying to do too!

2403921
Well, I'm feeling bad too, now, haha.

Please don't trouble yourself on my account. I only made so much mention out of it because this is one of the things most people complain about the most in my writing, and for 75% of the case they were deliberate word-swaps or what have you. Not to say I DON'T have any mistakes, of course.

The curious thing is that you seem to be doing in opposite what I set out to achieve by doing it. The evocation of the mood and tone through how things are written is something I believe strongly in, and with the specific words I use sometimes, the idea was for the casual reader to read one first and -then- notice something off, to which a bit of in depth thinking would reveal the double meaning, or a comparison between what I should have said and what I did say.

However, you've gone and went in depth FIRST, so perhaps that's muddling the intention. =)

But again, I'm really sorry to trouble you with all this. Certainly, I didn't mean to suggest that you were doing anything other than giving your frank and honest feedback, because then what is feedback for? I'm concerned about clarity first and foremost, as I've mentioned, so even with my style if I find that I need to tone it back in future stories then I will based on your comments.

So again, thank you for being honest! That's the best kind of comment. =)

I must not be in the right frame of mind right now. That must be it. Maybe if I gave the last chapter another look with a fresh mind... but as it stands, I hate Applejack. The candlelight dinner...the gesture alone was the only thing that should have mattered. The hell with whether or not it was the kind of thing she liked. And if she really ever 'loved' Rarity she would have accepted her faults. But she didn't. So I can't believe she ever loved Rarity. the hell with that. And that thing about Rarity stealing gems from Spike? That came out of left field, and why would she even do that? Yeah, right. The way Applejack treated Rarity was wrong, and Applejack didn't deserve a happy ending in this story. I love Rarijack...but Applejack didn't deserve Rarity in this story. Well this makes two non-tragedy romances out of four that I was interested in. *facehooves* I'll give the other two a look tomorrow, and this one another look tomorrow just to give it a fair shake.

2469480
Haha, that's new...
I never had a guy tell me they were against APPLEJACK in this one. That's an interesting perspective.

Well, you don't have to like it, of course not. The story was written about the late hours of a relationship that MIGHT have been but got nowhere. So the idea was that AJ was very worn out and tired by this point, and you know how when you're sort of over someone, everything they do gets annoying and irritating? Sort of like that. AJ lost belief in the chance. And what made it hard for AJ was that she wants to be in a relationship with Rarity, but everything about it is saying it'll not work out, so it caused a bit of confusion in AJ and she just became a bit lost.

Why she got frustrated with Rarity's gesture is more to do with the appropriateness of the situation than anything else. If I were angry at someone, and they knew it, bringing up old scars would piss me off too, and regardless of the intent it would probably stress me out even further. The idea of them being together is a point of pressure and a point of stress for AJ, so at the sight of the romantic sort of gussy up of the place just put more pressure on AJ's mind that "This is why I like her but at the same time this is why I hate her".

When AJ started listing all the things Rarity did wrong (ala the gems and all that) it was to point out the things that AJ was unhappy with regarding Rarity. It was the reasons BEFORE the story starts that she stopped liking Rarity. Basically AJ started to find Rarity more and more shallow, as Rarity kept trying to struggle with herself and her own addiction to be petty. That cumulated in the intro to the fic and the fic resolves the 'potential' of something happening.

That's just how I reasoned it when I was writing though. Certainly, if you don't like it, it's not to do with your frame of mind! People like different things, and maybe my own reasoning is messed up as well. I'll get better with time!

I felt that I should have known from the begining that they almost ended up in a relationship and were well aware of their attraction toward each other, rather than believing them ignorant to each other's feelings only to have that rather jarring twist at the end. Both characters knew it, so it's strange that I didn't. The character I saw in the story was Rarity to a tee. I thought AJ had lost her mind when she started talking about Rarity not being her anymore. The element of generosity stealing a gem from basically a kid that's infatuated with her, for reasons never explained, when she can easily find gems with her magic. A brief mention of that from AJ couldn't make make me believe it, especially so late in the story. Then AJ cites so many things about Rarity (makeup an stuff) that make her "not her"...but those were traits of hers from the begining. Traits she should have accepted if she ever loved her. And lastly to be offended by a romantic gesture because it opens up old wounds, [continued..text limit]

that's still being just as selfish and unappreciative the same as if the reasoning had simply been that it's not her thing. That AJ fell in love with her, then out of love with her over this stuff, it comes off as fickle fake love through and through. It seemed to me that AJ was the one who wasn't getting Rarity, that Rarity WAS the very same pony she fell in love with. I thought that AJ pretty much got away with murder in this fic, though. I'm exaggerating, but It drove me nuts that Rarity didn't stand up for herself. There was a lot she could have said to Applejack. Give her a piece of her mind. Get angry. Punch her in the mouth. She certainly wouldn't be wrong, and it'd probably do AJ some good. Whether you mean to or not, your ability to write characters that piss me off is...a very scary tool and an interesting one at the same time. I've never felt such emotion over a story.[end]

Login or register to comment