Deja Discord

by Ckat_Myla

9. Magic We All Share, How Much We Learn to Care

There was a very noticeable change in temperature the further down the stairs led her, and Twilight pondered whether or not that was from merely descending underground or – quite possibly – if she was going so far underground that the magic keeping the city warm was somehow dampened.

The unicorn held her head high with her horn alight, making note that there weren't even that many torches placed along the staircase, and that none of the few she spotted were lit.

The room at the bottom had to be a good twenty degrees colder than the library above, and not much in the way of lighting either. She cast her light from corner to corner, spotting mirrors placed at certain angles along each wall.

They were most likely put there to reflect light from above, something often used by ponies without the aid of magic to light such an underground room with what appeared to be little means of ventilation for torch smoke.

Using the mirrors along with her ball of light spell proved to light the room in a much more efficient manner than if Twilight had used the spell alone. It required much less concentration this way, which freed her up to begin exploring again.

The walls and shelves were made of stone rather than crystal, and with far fewer books and much more junk. Boxes of paperwork, unsorted books, and various other uncategorizeable things were stacked in piles nearly as high as the shelves themselves. The books and scrolls appeared fewer, but much, much older, and it all of the items coated with dust suggested that this was not an area often tended to.

Of course, Twilight was used to being amongst places like this. The smell of dust and decaying parchment were almost welcome, even if she had left the much friendlier and welcoming part of the library. This room felt like a combination of a dungeon and some pony's basement. If she asked permission, Twilight was fairly certain that she could put her own organizational skills to good use here.

With the state of the room, it was only a matter of time before she tripped over something. Even with the light aiding her. Sure enough, as she made to try and avoid a very old and fragile-looking chest, Twilight stumbled over a stack of books almost as tall as she and slamming her directly into the item she was trying to avoid.

The chest may have been locked at some point, but its rusted metal latch disintegrated in the unicorn’s fall on top of it. The lid slid sideways revealing the few contents that had managed to survive however long they had been kept in there. Twilight inspected the crumbling scrolls and books, only one of which didn’t look like it might fall apart if she so much as breathed on it.

The light seemed somehow more focused upon the one solid tome, perhaps it was the precise slanting of the lid that caused such prominence. As Twilight peeked in, creeping her nose cautiously closer to at least see the cover better, a tiny alarm went off inside her courtesy of her well-organized mind. This was getting her off of her set task, and she knew that. This whole excursion was possibly a big deviation from her plan, she really shouldn’t be indulging her curiosity so much.

That was completely right, Twilight told herself. Though as she thought that, it did not stop her still wanting to see. She would look at the cover, but she would not take it out.

The cover of the book appeared to be some type of leather, which was strange in itself. Equestrian publishers rarely used leather for fairly obvious reasons but as she analyzed it Twilight noticed that it wasn’t (thankfully) a leather made from a pony nor any hoofed animal she could name. But it wasn’t light enough a material to be anything else.

From her vantage point leaning into the chest, she could read only two words written in a language Twilight recognized as being very dead:

Statera Equus

It was a very old precursor to the contemporary Equestrian, but that clearly revealed this book to be centuries old. How it managed to stay in such good condition she had no idea.

Alright, so I’ll take it out to examine it, but only to see if I can translate it, she rationalized in her mind as she carefully freed the tome from the broken chest and placed it somewhere she could get a better look.

She had studied this proto-Equestrian somewhat, and she could manage a translation spell would help her with most of the rest. Upon further inspection the cover had smaller words underneath the two-word title. It was these words that caused all of that resolve Twilight had to get back on track to falter as dramatically as her eyes were wide.

Statera Equus: the Four Spirits of Balance

Four? Twilight thought. Wait, what? There were four spirit beings residing over the whole balance thing? But all of the history books she'd ever seen – even the ones containing the princesses' origins – had only ever mentioned Harmony. They barely even mentioned Discord, and Twilight only found out about his connection with The Great Pony when Princess Celestia explained it.

Her curiosity piqued more than ever, she swept the excess dust off of the cover and opened it. The first page held the same title, with a symbol of four colors swirling together in a circular pattern. Black, white, red, and blue. As they swirled, the colors appeared to pair up and intertwine with their partner: red with blue, white with black.

The table of contents on the next page listed a few titles Twilight recognized. The various origin stories of Equus and the countries that lay upon it. Her eyes caught a subsection dedicated to Princess Celestia and Princess Luna near the bottom of the list. From the page numbers on the right side of the columns, theirs appeared to be a shorter chapter.

The bulk of the book seemed to be dedicated to the titular spirits themselves. Twilight saw one sizable section for each of them listed. Harmony and Discord obviously, but below their names were two others labeled 'Mort' and 'Sef'.

Mort and Sef... Twilight did actually recognize the names. Mort was supposed to be the Reaper Pony, the one who supposedly came to claim the souls of the dead and escort them to the hereafter. Sef was just the opposite, she was supposed to be the one who selected souls to be born. At least that was the legend. She was always associated with life in any case. Twilight had never given those stories much credibility, especially since they were never shown in any actual history book she'd ever read.

Then again, Twilight was finding that history and mythology went closer together in this world than she had once believed. It hadn't been too long ago that a story she'd heard her whole life had been confirmed as more than just an old pony tale.

So these two had parts in the whole nature of Balance for the world. If this book was to be believed, that was. This was the only book in Twilight's current memory to say so, and it had been sitting here buried in the library of an empire that hadn't been seen for over a thousand years. She wasn't sure if that might actually lend it some validity or not.

She flipped to the section on Harmony to see if that coincided with what she already knew. It recited nearly exactly the story the princess told her with the memory spell, which Twilight knew now to be the true version. The other books she could recall almost never mentioned Discord, and when they did never depicting him as an equal or a partner to Harmony.

Harmony's chapters here mentioned him many times, specifying what the book defined as a 'sibling rivalry'. Once Twilight reached the chapter containing how Harmony had used her love for all the ponies and her own power of Order to create her daughters, there was a brief sentence about the events with Discord that followed, and an asterisk beside it.

Her eyes trained to glance down at the bottoms of pages at the sight of an asterisk, Twilight noticed a footnote:

For the tales of Discord's failed chaos creation and descent onto Equus, see the Discord section.

See the Discord section... as much as Twilight would like to continue examining the validity of this musty tome, she felt oddly hesitant to flip to that particular section. In all honesty the chance to learn more about him – especially when he hadn't offered much in the way of explanations – sent the flames of her curiosity to burn even brighter. Although it might be the same as it had been with Princess Celestia, maybe Discord had his reasons.

Her curiosity now threatening to burn her up, she decided to just casually flip a few pages while turning her head. After a few good flips she looked back down at the book's yellowed contents. A slight thrill of both guilt and a bit of satisfaction came to her when she saw that she had stopped near the beginning of Discord's chapters.

His section appeared to begin similarly to Harmony's, yet it was clear that even this book cast him in a more negative light. Or, perhaps that was merely Twilight's own perception of the book's tone. This would most likely still count as a 'biased pony recounting'.

His appearance is - like Harmony – said to be of his own choosing....Both beings seem to have chosen the forms that suit their realm best, which contrast each other in a way that also reflects their roles.

Twilight had wondered about that, and that explanation actually made sense. From the way it read, it sounded a lot like Discord created a body for himself to spite his 'sister', when she'd decided to as well. That was until she reached the next paragraph.

In the story telling of Harmony's creation of her daughters, Discord is sometimes mentioned to have also wanted to live with the mortals. His reasons are always said to be of a more mischievous or devious nature than his sister's.

Well, that was somewhat expected. As much as she knew his interest in ponies didn't spring forth from love or even a real respect as Harmony's did, Twilight knew that Discord did have some reasons for wanting to live among them. Maybe it really was simply that their plane was more interesting as he so often claimed, or maybe it was due to this rivalry between he and his partner. The book's author certainly seemed to think so. This was another reason for the unicorn to not fully accept the tome's facts. So much of it read far more from a certain point of view. Weren't all the best historical works supposed to be impartial, so they could give all the facts? They should, it certainly would make things a lot easier.

It wasn't a bad hypothesis. Like most of his past, Discord rarely mentioned Harmony. That was something Twilight might actually like to hear from his point of view. In this book as in all the others she knew, Harmony was lauded and praised for her great love and compassion. At least here it seemed Discord was getting a more full and equal representation, even if Twilight still gained the impression that they did hold her in much higher regard than he. She wasn't sure how much better or worse it was for these other two apparent spirits. The fact that they had never been presented to her as such in anyplace else was most likely her answer there.

But she could see why it made sense to the pony writers of old to play up the Great Pony. She was the ponies' champion among these spirits, the only one who seemed to care enough about them to create a brand new species of pony from her own self just so she could - in some way - be in the place she always wanted to go to.

Praising her was never the issue, it was the downplaying of Discord's role and the vilifying of him - even if his actions did warrant it - that caused Twilight to wonder as to the correctness of the stories. Well, maybe not the correctness, but certainly the fairness.

She chewed on that thought as she scanned the next page. The rising sense of injustice on Discord's behalf making them taste a bit more bitter than she was expecting. She was so focused on her own debates on conflicting sources that she was barely paying attention to the section she was reading. It was something about a 'failed attempt at recreation' made by Discord. She'd caught Celestia and Luna being mentioned again, and she supposed this was after their creation. It took her a few moments to really focus in on what the story was actually depicting, for at that moment her light flickered as a mirror was jostled, and Twilight's ears swiveled in the direction of the stairway.

She thought she had heard hoofsteps reach the bottom, and she lifted her head from the enormous book to glance around. One positive thing about the mirrors was that she did not actually have to move her head, for their reflections seemed to reach nearly the whole room. Out of one corner she could see movement, and she knew she wasn't alone.

Though it didn't keep her from giving a mild start when that somepony so swiftly and so silently placed a hoof on her shoulder. She turned from her seated position and saw - outlined by the light given off from Twilight’s magical source behind her - the slender form of her sister-in-law.

Her smile grew in relief when Twilight caught her reflection in the closest mirror even before she turned her head. The pink princess was a welcome sight and she gratefully accepted Cadance's hug.

"I didn't want to disturb you, but we haven't really been able to see each other," Cadance explained as she moved a few boxes to give herself a place to sit beside her sister-in-law.

"Well, this is a nice surprise," Twilight said. "I was actually getting a tad distracted so I suppose maybe a break is in order." She smiled back in response to Cadance's beaming, shrugging as she conceded and closed the book over her hoof to mark her place until she could find something else to do the job. It may not have been a book she needed, but she felt it was certainly something of worth… or it might be.

It was then that she noticed that it was only the two of them, no sign of her brother nor her royal entourage. "So you 're all by yourself? Where's Shiny?"

"It's actually getting closer to evening," Cadance answered, and Twilight had another sense of yet another day whooshing past without being really any closer. Now she felt more guilty about taking this little detour.

"It will be dinner time soon, but I sent my assistants ahead of me along with Shiny. I wanted to have a chance to talk, just you and me."

"Hmm, what for?"

"Do I need a big reason to want to have a chat with my favorite sister-in-law?" she asked, though it didn't appear that Cadance meant that to fool any pony. "I know you want to find answers quickly and I don't want to hold you up, but I did choose a time when we would have come and retrieved you anyway."

"I just feel bad now that I've wasted another day," Twilight sighed with an internal acknowledgement that she had allowed herself to be deterred. "It's not because of you, I shouldn't even really be down here."

"Yes, I don't believe I've ever seen this room before," Cadance said, taking in the dusty cobwebbed shelves and all-around neglected feel of the room. "Did you at least find something worth finding?" Twilight watched her eyes move to the book she had just closed, the one with her purple hoof still upon the cover obscuring the four-colored image emblazoned on it.

Twilight returned again for a moment to her thoughts on the strangely contradictory book. Contradictory to other books, that was. It did have more about Discord than she had ever seen in any history or mythology book, more than Discord himself would most likely offer up willingly. Her curiosity still lingered, even if - now that she actually knew him - it still felt a little bit like prying.

"Erm... I suppose," she gave in answer. "Have you ever seen this book before?” It was a longshot, Twilight knew. The book had been buried here in this underground archive for who knew how long, but much longer than Cadance had spent ruling the empire. Still the unicorn held her place with her hoof as she tilted forward the cover for Cadance to see. The princess looked over the symbol emblazoned on the leathery surface, but there was no more recognition on her face than Twlight's when she had first seen it.

"It includes other spirit beings in the balance of the world besides Harmony and Discord,” Twilight explained, turning back to where she had been reading. “This is the first I have ever read of that, although I had heard of the other two. Mort and Sef...” her sentence trailed off in a questioning way, asking Cadance indirectly to chime in that she knew who they were as well.

Cadance nodded. “Oh yes, I do know a little about them. But I always thought they maintained their own balance separately. I didn't think they were all connected.”

"If this book is right, than they are,” Twilight said. Her eyes landed on the section about Discord, that was another thing about this book that was so different. “And here it talks about Discord, but in more the way Princess Celestia explained it to me a few months ago. I don't think I've ever seen anything that depicts him as in any way helpful, or working with Harmony like I know he did.”

It was a familiar sense of defensiveness that overcame Twilight at that thought, a feeling of frustratingly unavoidable unfairness. But she knew that it was only ignorance of both ponies and Discord that caused it to be so unavoidable. If every pony knew about these other things in this book perhaps that might be the next step into a successful integration for Discord.

Considering what she knew to be true – and what she believed could be true – she hoped that this book was the one that was actually factual.

"I thought you were researching about Cloudsdale, and the problems concerning Tartarus,” Cadance said quizzically.

"I am,” she answered, embarrassed to have been caught getting off-track, but at least she could make a bit of a defense. “Though this does have some relevance to the situation with the gates,”

Cadance looked a bit unconvinced as she glanced back down at the pages. “How so?”

Twilight winced inwardly at her blunder, she had been referring to Discord's current situation and hoping that this might help in some way. She didn't know quite how much Cadance knew about that. Although it came back to her that Cady had not been in contact with the princesses since before Discord had been ponified. She couldn't have known about that. Yet she did at least know about her association with the spirit of chaos.

She wanted to be able to talk about it with her sister-in-law. There had been a time when she would come to Cady about nearly anything. It wasn't only about an issue of confidentiality, but about Discord's relationship with every pony, and how it seemed to affect her relationship with him... and them. Twilight wanted to explain how she felt this could possibly help fix the rift between the two sides.

The unicorn sighed, choosing to not answer Cadance's question, her mind filling back up with thoughts that even deep sighs couldn't clear.

The young princess looked past Twilight down to the section on the draconequus, still seeming to be drawing a conclusion.

“This is about your assignment to Discord?” she inquired.

Twilight nodded with a side glance to Cadance, trying to find a way to explain what a frustrating ball of conundrum both he and this whole matter was… and frowning at her uncertainty that she could accurately do so.

"I suppose I'm just getting tired of defending them to each other. However much I try to explain things, it's a slow uphill road to get ponies to stop fearing him or to get Discord to appreciate them. Well, they need to appreciate each other, and I just feel caught in-between.”

When Twilight turned her face back to Cadance more properly, she noticed the princess was looking at her in sort of an odd way. She had narrowed her eyes and was blinking confusedly. It wasn’t something negative at all, more like she was searching Twilight over, studying her closely as if the unicorn had something written on her that Cadance could barely make out.

After about a minute of this, Twilight began to feel a tad worried. Perhaps Cadance could see something that she couldn’t.

"Everything ok?” she asked slowly.

She saw Cadance blink again and give a little double take at the unicorn’s words. She was back to smiling, although something in the older mare’s eyes held a bit more understanding than Twilight was comfortable with.

"Yes, I’m fine, everything is fine. But um…” she hesitated, and Twilight wondered what she had been looking at. “I didn’t know you were so personally involved.”

“Why shouldn’t I be, I want to find ways that benefit every pony, and he is part of every pony,” Twilight answered, though as she said it she knew that it wasn’t the whole truth.

“Of course,” Cadance agreed. “I should know you would take all of your duties so seriously.”

Again some pony mentioning her friendship with him as a duty, which Twilight did know that in part it was… officially it was.

It was that same feeling, that awkward jumble of her heart to convey the reality that - ever since she first extended that hoof of friendship to Discord - their connection had been harder to pin down. More than a responsibility, she was genuinely his friend, and in the time they spent together it had been proven that he had genuinely grown to be hers. That distinction was the what had made her feel so differently about this bond of theirs, bringing with it an odd sense of joy at the thought. But uncertainty reared its head again. Why then did Discord not seem to want to heed her instructions or advice?

“I want to do right by him,“ she said in all honesty, because she really did… and not only because it was the right thing to do. “I just wish I could tell if he understands that.”

The young princess looked puzzled again for a moment, one delicate eyebrow raised with an unspoken question clearly forming in her mind. Twilight was sure she was looking just as questioningly back at her. The unicorn waited, but in an instant a smile had returned to Cadance’s lips, and a different question sprouted from them.

"Did you know that I had a crush on your brother even when we were growing up?”

Twilight blinked, finding this to be an odd thing to ask out of the blue. "No, I had no idea,” she admitted. She had never really been all that perceptive when it came to noticing that sort of thing, especially not when she was a filly.

Cadance giggled at her own memory. “I'm sorry to say, but you weren't the only reason why I was always so happy to come and foal sit for you,” she said a bit pointedly. “One of the things I liked most about him was that he never treated me like the rest of our schoolmates did. Having the princess for a guardian – being a princess – it caused the others to feel like I needed some sort of special treatment, or assume that I was going to demand special treatment. I never quite knew how many of my friendships were true, but with Shining Armor... he never did any of that. I was just 'Cadance' to him. And that… that made me feel special.”

"Being treated like you weren't special made you feel special?”

"Being treated like a pony, like he saw me as an actual friend with no other preconceptions made me feel special. It made me remember him, and appreciate him. Then that grew to become something else.’

"Not that I actually told him,” she added, lost for the moment in her own nostalgic musings.
“ It wasn't until we saw each other again after years apart that I found the courage to say something. I didn't think it mattered anymore, but then he actually told me he had felt the same way for me back then. That sort of changed everything.”

"Why are you telling me this?” Twilight asked, politely attempting to guide her sister-in-law back to her point..

"Because that may be something Discord has found in you, too. Some pony that talks to him as an equal, who likes him for who he is rather than what he is,” Cadance explained.

"A whole lot of good it's done me,” Twilight said with a roll of her eyes. They settled themselves for a few moments to looking down at the book's elaborately-styled illustration of Discord and Harmony. “It's hard to tell if he even listens to me about important issues, and if he's so appreciative of our friendship why does he insist that I don't care about his problems?”

"Maybe he's actually afraid you don't.”

"But I do care!” Twilight's statement echoed as her hoof slammed onto the table. “That is how I show that I care. I've been going to see him for months, and every time trying to teach him about friendship, even though there is so much that he doesn't want to discuss, that he doesn't want to tell me. Sometimes I even come twice every week, even when I'm tired and no matter how busy my schedule is. I have always made time to visit. It was only these past few weeks I missed. Why else does he think I would do that?”

The memory replayed to answer her own question. When she'd returned to his home he had joked about her 'abandoning' him, but Twilight had even then figured that had been Discord hiding behind his humor, and then there was their last big argument in his bedroom. He'd again brought up the idea of her giving up on him. She thought she had given enough thought to his side... but at the time the very notion that he could be so ignorant – or even so insecure – had not entered her mind.

“You could be right,” the unicorn said with a glance to Cadance, much quieter at this realization. He hadn't seen a way out of his predicament a few months ago, either. Even when she had told him she had faith in him, and after he had tried to convince her friends Discord had still acted as if he'd expected her plan to fail. There had to be a connection.

“It’s almost like... he's confident in his abilities, and yet he is not confident in his ability to be anything but hated,” she spoke softly down to the inked-in visage of the draconequus. There again was that sense of near-uselessness, that Twilight hadn't been able to help him as much as she should have... as much as she wanted to.

It wasn't enough for her to believe that they could accept him or vice versa, he had to as well.

Finding herself getting lost in her own thoughts this time, Twilight slowly lifted her gaze back up to Cadance. The young princess still sat next to her, watching her.

“What else can I do to convince him?”

She wasn't surprised that even Cadance was having trouble answering, Twilight could tell she wanted to help, but it was a delicate matter, so terribly knotted up that even some pony as skilled as she was at unraveling emotions from a situation could be a bit stumped. It wasn't the unicorn's imagination either that Cadance still seemed distracted.

Distracted, just like Twilight had been. She shouldn't even be down in this place, even if this book could prove to be such a useful aid... it wasn't the aid she needed at the moment. As much as she wanted more of the princess's advice – and work on how she could continue working with Discord – Twilight knew she'd taken enough of a detour.

Snapping to her hooves, she closed the book with a slam and a grunt of indignation at her own procrastination.

“You know what, I shouldn't be down here. It's fine... well actually it's not but... the faster I can find a solution to Ponyville's and Cloudsdale's problem, the sooner I can focus on Discord's situation.”

“But what about dinner?” Cadance asked as Twilight was heading for the stairs, the Statera Equus floating beside her in her magical aura.

“Just give me ten minutes to look a bit more,” she called from the stairway, already half-back in her determined searching mode.

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Cadance remained seated next to the spot that had but a second ago held Twilight, but without really any warning the younger pony had jumped to her hooves and was already trotting up the long stairway before Cadance had had a chance to call her back.

She was fairly certain that the unicorn would probably forgo dinner in favor of getting back on track, so the princess knew she should follow and drag her out of the library if need be to get a good meal. The head start her hesitance had given Twilight was one reason that made it harder for her to begin her own climb back upwards, what she had seen while speaking to Twilight was another.

She slowly rose and used her own magic to form a ball of light to guide her, but she still wondered about Twilight’s words. Her mind was set somewhere between amused and bemused at the very thought. Her special talent having to much to do with love, the young princess could always sense the auras of connection surrounding all ponies. Different auras with varying strengths constantly exuding from every being she met without their knowledge, and sometimes even visible to her eyes if she focused hard enough.

There were of course different types of love, different colors swirling and mixing about a pony, for a pony’s heart was a complicated and turbulent place. It hadn’t been the number of colors Cadance had seen around Twilight, it had been the sight of one she had never seen coming from the mare before. It wasn’t quite as clearly-defined as say - the ones that showed her friendships’ strengths - but it was definitely something Cadance had not expected to see from Twilight, and certainly not while she had been talking about---

Cadance’s contemplation almost caused her to miss a step, she fumbled for a moment on the cold stone before continuing on. It had to have been a mistake, Cadance couldn’t read Twilight’s mind, but the correlation was sort of hard to miss. She had been so excited at first to see that Twilight might have actually taken an interest in some pony in that way, even if this particular shade was so faint that she must not have known herself. She had been eager to help Twilight sort things out, but if her suspicions were correct… she didn’t know what she should do.

Discord, the princess pondered the name with an inward disbelief. A part of her wanted very much to be wrong about what she had seen, she knew that the two of them did have a connection that was irrefutable, she had seen some of that in there as well. Cadance almost wanted to convince herself that was what she had seen, only a very strong magical bond. Her heart ached at the half-truth she attempted to get herself to swallow, and it ached for her little Twily who had absolutely no experience in the kind of love she had sensed forming within the unicorn. To have such a thing bloom inside her for what might be the first time as far as Cadance knew, only for it to be… to be because of some pony like him… she dreaded what might come of this.

She wanted to help her little sister, that was her duty. Who knew - if Cadance was right - what might happen? Twilight could get over it, or (knowing her) she might never realize what her feelings meant or be far too sensible to act on them. Was there a chance however, that this could become something?

She had already suspected that Twilight’s original connection with Discord would be beneficial to her idea for the plans her aunts had for the future, a plan that Twilight was not completely in the know about, but that Cadance had known about since not long after she and Shining Armor became engaged. With this new piece of information though… Cadance wasn’t sure about it anymore. It could make things easier, or it could make things even more difficult for the princesses... and for Auntie Celestia certainly.

It wasn’t something Twilight had to worry about right now on top of everything anyway, not yet. It wasn’t really something Cadance wanted to focus on either, especially now she had the idea that her little bookworm of a sister-in-law could be falling in love at long last (which made her want to smile in a proud and sisterly way)… but that her heart’s choice had to be so… Discord (which had now caused Cadance to stumble on the stairs three times as she tried to wrap her mind around the concept).

Even if she very much felt like she should say something - at least to Twilight - her elder-sisterly duties were overruled by that of her own special talents’. She could not and should not interfere with matters of the heart unless called to do so. It was a rule made by her own design, to keep herself from meddling and causing harm to the bonds she saw. Cadance would remain silent about it until Twilight came to her on her own. She also concluded that it would not be in any pony’s best interest to tell either of her aunts. She would not want to be the spirit of chaos if/when Auntie Celestia ever learned about it, in any case.

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Discord trudged dejectedly along behind Spike as he waddled into the warm, vaguely-cinnamon scented bakery. Pinkie Pie was busy at the counter, and the Cakes attending to customers or in the back baking. He led the particularly sullen temporary-pony up to the bar and leapt onto a stool. Discord followed suit, looking sideways at the young dragon and unsure of what he should do now.

“What should I ask for, I’ve never actually eaten or drank anything for actual sustenance before,” he asked.

“Does that mean you don’t eat?” Spike asked him. “That sounds like a rough life.”

“No, I eat, but only when and what I feel like,” he explained. “Never actually had to be hungry or anything, so a little uncertain on what to do now.”

Spike shrugged. “Everything here’s pretty good. I’m more a fan of gemstones myself, but you take what’s available when you live in a pony town with no other dragons.”

After a few moments of staring at the menu, Spike pointed to an item to suggest.

“You like chocolate milk, right? Maybe to start you off with something simple.”

“Well, I never actually drank it. I’ve used it in my ‘redecorating’ fun, but I had much more fun drinking the glass around the beverage.”

Spike raised an eyebrow and shook his head. “I… wouldn’t recommend trying that at the moment.”

When Mrs. Cake came around to them, Spike ordered two chocolate milks and a cupcake for himself. When they arrived Discord only stared at it, then gave the glass a tap with one hoof, scooting it along the table a few centimeters.

“What’s up now?” the dragon asked, Discord only gave another dejected sigh.

“Hooves,” he grumbled under his breath.

“That’s an easy fix,” Spike said as he pulled out a white bendy straw with red stripes. He stuck it into the thick brown drink and nudged it closer to the unicorn.

His ears drooped, Discord tried to bring the straw to his mouth, but every time he tried to bring his mouth towards it, the straw would slide a little further down the rim of the glass. What followed was a three-minute war waged between Discord’s tongue and the straw, him chasing it around and around as it dodged him, fully intent on not going into his mouth.

At first this was hilarious to Spike, who giggled all the while, but as it went into its fourth minute, ponies were starting to look over at them, and Pinkie Pie had discovered Discord’s noble struggle and was cheering him on with much enthusiasm. The dragon evidently had had enough, and finally decided to just grab the straw from the farthest side of the glass and shove the bent end into Discord’s mouth.

He mumbled a ‘thanks,” before attempting to take a casual sip, he attempted because now all the ponies in Sugarcube Corner were staring at them, for Pinkie was jumping up and down with joy at Discord’s ‘victory’.

He took a long, long sip that filled his entire mouth with the cold, sweet, chocolatey goodness. He stopped only when he could physically not fit any more into his mouth. Taking a moment to swallow some of the excess, the pseudo-unicorn swirled it about in his mouth, savoring it with a critical mind, trying to decide if he liked it. It didn’t take very long however.

“Huh,” he concluded as he finished the mouthful of tasty milky milkiness. “So that’s chocolate milk. Did not know what I was missing.”

He slammed his hoof on the counter, causing his glass to jump and some of the liquid to leap out. “Another!” he shouted.

“Uh, how about you finish that one first?” Spike said, and Discord hurriedly gulped his present treat down and then slammed his hoof again.

“Ok… how about another round over here, please?” Spike asked Mrs. Cake with an awkward, apologetic tone. She didn’t look too perturbed about Discord’s behavior, only a bit surprised.

“Oh, ok dear,” she said and brought them two more, though Spike had not finished his own. Discord ended up drinking both new glasses in under five minutes, and then Spike had to ask for more.

After an hour had passed, the two where hiccuping and groaning, surrounded by at least thirty empty glasses and looking quite satisfied indeed.

Spike had taken a chocolate milk break and gotten himself a few more cupcakes, but Discord had completely glutted himself on the beverage, and now he sat with his head resting on one hoof, his other grasping for a half-full glass and scooting it along as he had been doing previously. Both pony and dragon were experiencing wicked tummy aches, though only the latter knew what was happening.

“I feel like I am going to explode,” Discord moaned, now using his magic to float his half-full glass, but not sure if taking another sip would ease the churning in his stomach or make it worse.

“As long as you don’t explode in this direction,” Spike tried to joke through his own moan of gastro-intestinal distress.

After a few moments of silence, Discord noticed that Spike was looking over at him, a pondering sort of look on his face, though that might just have been his stomach.

The dragon finally spoke up, his little claw pointing to the former-draconequus.

“So... how's the shoulder?”

Discord gave his now-bad front leg a testing move, rotating it in a slow circle. It was definitely better than it had been, but the memory of what pain could be like in this form was still fairly fresh in his mind.

“What happened to your shoulder?” Pinkie inquired with a tilted head. She had wandered off from them for a few moments to do some bakery task or another, returning with her own glass of chocolate milk.

“Don't ask,” Discord said with a side glance at the pink pony.

“But I already did,” he heard her say before beginning to blow bubbles in her milk.

“Well, you seem to be okay now,” Spike continued over Pinkie's continued bubble-blowing.

“As 'okay' as it is possible to be in such a fragile state,” Discord's stomach was easing away from the queasiness of all that dairy product, but it didn't completely dissolve the uneasiness that experience had brought on. “I wonder what other unpleasant surprises await me.”

The dragon seemed to notice that he was not doing as good a job at cheering Discord up as he'd thought. True, the round of drinks was a welcome distraction and it did lighten his mood slightly, but Discord wasn't sure this trip to the bakery was all about making him feel better about the day's trauma.

“Come on, being a pony isn't all that bad, you've just been sorta unlucky and... maybe focusing on the wrong things. You've been here a few days, you have to observed some good stuff by now.”

Discord tapped his latest glass of chocolate milk in answer.

“Besides that,” Spike prodded him. “I don’t think Twilight or the princesses are gonna accept the refreshments as the only thing you’ve observed as good about them.”

He gave a slight shrug in acknowledgment to the dragon, for he knew that to be right. But what was he supposed to do, make a list and take notes? Write an essay using bullet points? Most of what he experienced was typical of or worse than Discord had imagined ponies’ lives to be. That might have had something to do with the cloud city dropping down on their home though, so perhaps he hadn’t been experiencing what would be labeled a typical day for them.

They were doing a lot though, he had to admit. Even if these methods seemed so arbitrary to him, that didn’t appear to stop them. If this was everything in their power and the ponies were truly utilizing everything at their disposal to at least treat the symptoms of this unknown force, it was at least respectable.

“They’re resilient, I suppose,” he answered after a while. “I don’t think I’ve seen any of the able-bodied ponies sitting still for long. They have a plan and they’re all sticking to it.”

He saw Spike smile and look to the room at large for a moment, then nodding as he picked up his own newly-poured glass.

“Those were the orders, and they have faith that Twilight and the others will find a way to fix it for good. So in the meantime yeah, they wanna do what they can.”

“And you won’t give up, will you?” Discord’s rhetorical question was thoughtful, thinking back to the limping pegasi and Rainbow Dash’s aggravated anxiety over it. It didn’t strike him in the same way as hearing Twilight’s worries, but it was difficult for him not to find some similarities the more he thought about it.

“You don’t have to do that,” Spike said from his side, pulling him away from the sorting of the memories. When Discord raised an eyebrow questioningly, he tacked on, “add me in with them. I mean, that’s nice of you, but we both know I’m not a pony. I haven’t been able to do much at all since I sent the letter. To be honest I’ve felt kinda useless.”

“Oh don’t take it completely as a compliment, it’s only since you are so well-integrated Pony Boy,” he tried to raise his glass to the dragon, but it only scooted away from his hoof. “And I’d dare say Twilight thinks you’re helping, cleaning up and foal-sitting me after all.”

Spike shrugged and stirred the milk slowly with his straw. “I guess, but every pony else has been able to use their talents to try and help. Being fast or strong or being able to use magic. I mean, I know a lot about magic - and ponies - but I can’t actually do magic or fly or anything. There’s stuff about pony life that I’ll never get to do.”

“Did you want to exhaust yourself pulling with those ropes or picking apples?” Discord asked.

Spike gave a half-amused sound that might have been a chuckle. “More like being counted, being able to do stuff that matters and that ponies acknowledge. Discovering talents and then being able to contribute with every pony knowing what you can do.”

Pinkie Pie stopped blowing bubbles in her glass of milk (which had now overflowed and was dripping on the counter) to pat the dragon’s clawed hand with affection.

“Aww Spike, we acknowledge you. You’re a great assistant to Twilight, and you’re helpful to every pony I know.”

The two males blinked at her, having nearly forgotten she was there.

“Have you been blowing bubbles this whole time?” Spiked asked her, but then shook his head as if it didn’t really matter. “Whatever, thanks Pinkie. I’m glad you guys appreciate what I do, but that doesn’t change that not every pony does. I’m still the baby dragon who lives with Twilight to some ponies, and the only one around.”

“But that makes you super special!” Pinkie said, to which Discord saw Spike roll his eyes with a smile like that was something always said about him. The pink pony then leaned over the counter a bit, scrutinizing Spike with a pondering “hmm,”.

“Wait, does this have something to do with Rarity?”

The young dragon jumped at the question and hastily grabbed the pony’s face to cover her mouth. “What, no way!” he said far too quickly, shushing Pinkie and glancing swiftly to Discord.

Pinkie backed over to her side of the counter and away from Spike’s censoring hold on her muzzle. “It’s nothing to be embarrassed about, silly. Maybe you just need to give her some more time to notice you. I mean you’re already over at her boutique practically every day, can’t be long now before she puts it all together.”

Spike face palmed, but Pinkie didn’t seem to notice, she now merrily began to clean up the mess she had made with her drink.

“And that was all about…?” Discord left the question open as Spike tried to hide from his confused stare.

“Nothing,” Spike tried, muffled from his head on top of his arm face down on the counter. He must have known that didn’t fool the pseudo-unicorn.

Rarity, the one who’d made him these clothes, and the one supposedly next to take him for a time (no doubt she would want him to attempt that spell as well, being the only unicorn of the group at present). Discord thought he had noticed a certain… preoccupation of the dragon’s when they had been in her store. He had nearly floated off the ground when she’d given him that glowing commendation. Even with that he didn’t think he would have thought too hard about his comments if Pinkie hadn’t said something, or if the drake had kept his cool.

He smirked at the obviousness, he didn’t suspect his feelings were all that secret. Discord hadn’t meant for his chuckle to come out derisive, but he couldn’t help but laugh even if Spike scowled up at him.

“What?” he grumbled, having left the safety of his own folded arm.

The face he made then only caused Discord to chuckle again, lifting a hoof in a kind of hope that Spike wouldn’t take it too seriously. “Well, it’s just… she’s a bit old for you, don’t you think Pony Boy?”

Spike scoffed. “You’re one to talk,” he said a bit defensively. That was clearly a deflection, but it surprised him. What was that supposed to mean?

“You’re a bit too old for Twilight, don’t you think?”

Discord froze at his accusingly-toned clarification. He felt a jolt that gave him a little jump of his own, knocking over his still nearly-full glass of chocolate milk. His first instinct at Spike’s words was panic, but the way he said it, almost as an insult… like he was calling the former-draconequus out on something. It gave him this strange sense of frustration and embarrassment, like whatever he was getting at Discord should deny at all costs.

“Wait…” it took him a moment, but the pieces clicked into place. He waved the dragon’s statement away before he knew what he was doing. “You think that--- you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Uh huh,” Spike said sarcastically. “And you only tried to pop in on her at the library because she was taking too long.”

He was regaining a smile quite similar to the one he’d had when he came to see Discord to tell him what had been keeping Twilight. That smile that made Spike look like he thought he had it all figured out, when in actuality it was him - Discord - that knew it all. This baby dragon shouldn’t assume to know things he didn’t understand. Even if Discord maybe didn’t quite understand either… but that was besides the point.

“I’m more observant than you think, “he added. “I may not have seen you around her much, but you always seem to compare every pony to her, like she’s your base line. Plus you keep complaining about her not being here, and that just keeps me thinking about the other day. I guess I can’t blame you. She was your first friend for a while. I kind of want to be wrong about it though, no offense.”

Discord hoped his expression conveyed that there was indeed offense taken. “I am sure that I have no idea what you could possibly be referring to.”

“Well, the cat’s out of the bag on my feelings for Rarity - you can’t tell any pony about that by the way - if you feel like coming clean about anything, I promise I won’t say anything.” Spike crossed his heart and then poked his eye, as he waited for Discord to speak.

What was he waiting for, a confession? Well, there wasn’t anything to confess in Discord’s opinion. The tightness in his chest was probably just the vest he was wearing, and was this place getting warm? It was probably just too crowded.

“That’s none of your business,” he managed to say, which was obviously the wrong thing because it just caused Spike’s smile to grow. “I am not discussing something like that with you, even if things between myself and Twilight were what you’re suggesting--- which they aren’t,” he emphasized, mentally cursing the dragon for catching him off guard with this. “I mean there’s absolutely no way…and I’m not going to talk about this anymore.”

Discord turned away from his companion but he just knew that Spike was still grinning smugly behind his back. Discord didn’t know why he’d had such a visceral reaction to it, he’d been able to talk about Twilight around and with Spike normally before. But what he was inferring… that his friendship with her could be anything other than what it was… well, he didn’t know anything now did he?

“Yeah, you’re right,” he heard Spike say, which caused Discord to turn back towards him. “She’s way out of your league.”

“Excuse me?” he took the bait, like a putz he took the bait. Discord back-tracked like a wild pony then, pretending he had not said that and attempting to slip back behind his mask that so often hid his true motives.

He wasn’t sure he had convinced the dragon, but Spike at least shut up about it then. It was quiet and perhaps a little tense between the two of them, Pinkie having finally departed to some other part of the shop.

“I know Rainbow Dash probably won't say so, but I'm sure she really did appreciate your input, or at least you know... the effort you were making there.”

The pseudo-unicorn propped his head on the hoof whose forleg had not been wrenched from its socket today as his dragon companion tried to look on the bright side. That was no doubt a pony-like trait as well, even when things were literally crashing down around them.

“I'm sure she appreciates that I won't be making any more request to go up there again,” he said.

“Didn't think you would be in a hurry after that,” Spike said. “But seriously… you weren't really just trying to skip spell duty were you?”

Such disbelief, even from this dragon? Was it so hard to believe that he might have more than one motive for doing the things he did? True he did have the desire to avoid the exhaustion, boredom, and pain he'd been experiencing as a pony so far, but he'd have thought at least his appointed shadow would think somewhat better of him than the others Twilight had left him with.

...but he couldn't completely deny that had been part of the plan either, and that might have been what Spike picked up on.

“Maybe I did, then again perhaps I really did want to see what all the fuss was about for myself.”

“But you know that was the only thing Twilight specifically said she wanted you to do while she was gone, why hold it off?”

“As if Ms. Sparky really knows what she wants,” the non-sequitur rolled out of his mouth to keep from answering the question.

It may well have been because that was the only thing she'd told – practically ordered more like – him to attempt in her absence during this whole 'lesson' that he'd avoided it. A bit petty yes, and a bit of an empty victory if Twilight was not physically there to see him not-helping with that. But so what? He'd been forced to labor for an entire day and then the next day – when he actually went out of his way to do something he considered ‘helpful’ in some small way – he got to enjoy the fun of injury.

It was that, and the thought of his inadequate unicorn magic being able to pull that spell off. Even if this method still felt overcomplicated to him, all of these ponies had been able to keep it up. What if he couldn't--- or, what if this body's magic wasn't equipped enough to handle it? It was hardly Discord's fault if the princesses had stuck him in a defective model. Even if he did, again it wasn't as if she would be here to see it. He could surely learn more about ponies some other way.

Almost on cue, Discord noticed the hulking red form of Big Mac out of the corner of his eye. Leaning his head towards the line of ponies waiting for pick up orders, he spotted him. The stallion wasn't exactly difficult to spot, but it was almost amusing that Discord only noticed him now. Of course he would show up at this moment. Mac looked over at them for a second, gave a curt yet not unkind nod to him, and then moved up two ponies in the line.

It was something she wanted him to do, and he had been avoiding it. Even if Twilight’s ideas about their friendship may not be quite the same as Discord’s, it was something that he should be willing to ‘do’ for her.

He sighed deeply. He knew he still wasn’t going to enjoy it, but he’d already had to endure frustration, tedium, and both physical exhaustion and pain. The spell couldn’t be that difficult.

“Fine,” he said as he stood to stretch his now cramping back legs. “If it will get every pony to stop pestering me about it, let’s find your mare friend and get me on the dumb spell duty.”

Spike looked more than surprised, but he hopped up as well. Discord didn’t glance at his face for long however, just in case the little dragon was still reading too much into things.

---

---

---

The night was waning, coming very close to time for Celestia to begin her preparations to raise the sun, but the white alicorn still stood at the gates of Tartarus for as long as was responsible. Celestia was determined to make the most of her turn, and to give her sister a bit more time for rest.

Both princesses had been up for far too long, and the strain of this was taking its toll. Luna had been resting for much of her own night. Not long after she had raised the moon and brought out the stars did she return to the hidden gates of the prison to help her sister use their mother’s ancient power to keep the seals from weakening any further.

It was now time for Luna to take over for her sister, and this changing of the guard needed to be done carefully, for there was a slight chance – however small – that during the few seconds between one princess ceasing her spell, and the other beginning hers, that something might be able to escape through the gates.

So far they seemed to have been lucky, for As Luna stood to begin shooting her portion of the order magic, Celestia nearly crumpled upon stopping her own. The alicorn shakily got to her hooves, giving Luna a nod as she was able to stay upright.

Luna nodded in return, and as the dark blue alicorn began to focus on the seals upon the gates, so did the white alicorn open her wings and – with a moments reluctance to try and summon the strength – teleported herself out into the night. Her other duty to bring about the day was calling her, and that was one she must never put off, even for the ponies' own safety (and although they did not know it).

With both princesses so focused on their task, so weary but determined to continue, they were not quite as observant as they might have been under the usual circumstances. For during their silent goodbye, and as Luna was focusing and Celestia was regaining the strength to leave, there was the perfect instance, a split-second moment for something very small to find its way through the weakening gates of Tartarus.

Something small, but not for very long.

Comments

[BBkat]

Part of me still can't help but wonder if Cloudsdale sinking is somehow connected to Twi having a chunk of Discord's magic in her. I mean she hasn't used it, and I'm sure it's bound to affect stuff. Or it's the world's way of trying to balance out the lack of Discord or something.
I'm probably way wrong though.

[Thadius]

Good stuff. Keep up the good work!

[MrSpartan]

Wonder what fresh hell has been unleashed from that split second lapse in Tartarus's security.

[khatre]

Life, Death, Harmony and Discord ...
It is going to be real interesting to find out exactly how (and what) threw balance out of wack enough to disrupt magic in Equestria (and maby even the whole world ... )
I do not know what the answer is but it will probably be much more complex than just giving Discord his full powers back.

[JeromeSaur]

OH MY GOD
THAT MOMENT WITH SPIKE AND DISCORD I JUST COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING AT

He smirked at the obviousness, he didn’t suspect his feelings were all that secret. Discord hadn’t meant for his chuckle to come out derisive, but he couldn’t help but laugh even if Spike scowled up at him.

“What?” he grumbled, having left the safety of his own folded arm.

The face he made then only caused Discord to chuckle again, lifting a hoof in a kind of hope that Spike wouldn’t take it too seriously. “Well, it’s just… she’s a bit old for you, don’t you think Pony Boy?”

Spike scoffed. “You’re one to talk,” he said a bit defensively. That was clearly a deflection, but it surprised him. What was that supposed to mean?

“You’re a bit too old for Twilight, don’t you think?”

Discord froze at his accusingly-toned clarification. He felt a jolt that gave him a little jump of his own, knocking over his still nearly-full glass of chocolate milk. His first instinct at Spike’s words was panic, but the way he said it, almost as an insult… like he was calling the former-draconequus out on something. It gave him this strange sense of frustration and embarrassment, like whatever he was getting at Discord should deny at all costs.

“Wait…” it took him a moment, but the pieces clicked into place. He waved the dragon’s statement away before he knew what he was doing. “You think that--- you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

THIS IS ALL I COULD THINK ABOUT WHILE READING IT:

[JeromeSaur]

Oh my f*cking god guys
usually with such an extravagant story such as this one you'd expect her to update within, like, a month or two.
I was thoroughly satisfied that I only had to wait two weeks.
More, please!

[Xion_Stellar]

It's a pleasant surprise to find out that I didn't have to wait long for this update and I really did enjoy very much so!

[Sada Pazaki]

I'm loving this story SO much!

[JeromeSaur]

Hehe
another story for me to obsess over

[amiamera]

You handle the internal conflicts very well. I particularly enjoyed twilight, cadance and Discord's internal conflicts over their feelings, their duty, and who they think they are.

[PrincessLaLa]

Cadence's Talent : Ship. ship. ship. ship. ship.
SHIP THEM!
Cadence's Mind: MUST NOT SHIP THEM....*Cadence squeal* okay I ship them.

[Drake-O-Kid123]

“No, I eat, but only when and what I feel like,” he explained. “Never actually had to be hungry or anything, so a little uncertain on what to do now.”

Sounds like a dream