Chapter 1
Appledash
Short, sweet, to the point. Happy Friday, fimfiction.
"You're WHAT?" Twilight's voice resounded through the barn, her astonished tone causing fluttershy to cringe.
"We... We're in love."
Applejack's statement came as a shock not only to Twilight. The rest of the ponies in the room stood transfixed, scarcely comprehending the words they were hearing.
Twilight was adamant, her face contorted by shock. "Are... Are you sure you're actually IN love?"
Rainbow Dash spoke up. "Does this answer your question?" She pulled Applejack in close, their lips locking together in their first public display of affection. And boy was it a doozy.
"Wow! Dash, that was... Wow!"
Applejack was so caught up in Rainbow Dash's kiss she didn't notice Big Macintosh walk into the barn.
"Hey sis, I-" he was silenced by the scene in front of him. He locked eyes with his sister, watching his expression go from ignorance to shock to embarrassment. "Uhhh, maybe I should go-"
"No!" said Applejack, sporting an intense blush that threatened to burst right out of her head. "It's best that y'all see this, too." she turned, staring longingly into her partner's eyes. "Me and Dashie... We're in love."
For all his simple-mindedness, Big Macintosh was struck dumb. His own sister? In love with another mare? He had certainly never seen this coming. He knew he had to say something, but he was still in a mild state of shock. Finally, he managed to spit out, "Uh... Okay. I, Uh- I'm... Gonna go think for a spell." he strolled out of the barn, a look on confusion etched onto his face.
Dash turned to Applejack. "Is he gonna be okay?" For all her bravado, Rainbow was finally showing a soft, emotional side.
"Yeah. He'll be just fine. Ah think he just needs some time ta process the news. Ah mean look. Even Twi's gawkin' like a tourist."
Rarity cut in. "Well I think it's just wonderful! Wonderful indeed!"
Pinkie cantered around the new couple in circles, saying in a sing-song tone, "Oh oh oh! I'll have throw a 'Hey-guess-what-Rainbow-Dash-and-Applejack-are-doin'-it'-party!"
"Pinkie Pie!" snarled Applejack, "We are not 'doing it'! Right Dash?"
It was all Rainbow could do to keep her wings down in front of her friends, the memories were so fresh. "I don't know about you Applejack, but I'm sure that about sums up what happened last night." As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she collapsed on her back, crying tears of laughter. Even Twilight had to chuckle at the earth pony's reaction. As soon as Dash had stopped laughing, she received a not-so-polite shove from Applejack.
"That's NOT funny. I don't want y'all going round Ponyville and spoutin’ off about what went on last night." Apparently, Applejack had remembered the previous night as well, as she was shifting uncomfortably, a look of lust briefly adorning her face.
Dash went into another fit of hysterics. "So you admit it!"
Applejack could do nothing but roll her eyes. "This is the pony I just declared my love for!" she shouted, her voice laced with sarcasm.
"Oh calm down, Jackie. Laughter's the best medicine, and whatnot." After a few deep breaths, Rainbow regained her composure. "Now, as I was say-hic-" a petite hiccup escaped from her lips.
Now it was her partners turn to laugh. "Oh, now y'all done it!"
"Hic-shut up! It's not-hic-funny!" The five ponies overcome by laughter in front of her begged to differ, however.
"Oh come on now," Applejack said between giggles, "Ah think it's pretty cute." To reinforce her point, she planted a kiss on Dash's cheek.
The room was silent for a moment. "Hey, I think that worked!" said Dash. "My hiccups are go-hic-" anguish spread across her face, and she sighed, falling backwards in defeat. Seeing her marefriend in distress, Applejack flopped down next to her, cuddling up into her multicolored mane.
"Aw come on now. It's just hiccups. Nothin' to worry about."
"I just these darn hiccups make me feel so... Girly."
Applejack leaned in close, pecking her neck lightly as she spoke. "Well you certainly were a stallion last night."
Dash could no longer control her wings as they shot skyward, prompting an embarrassed reaction from the Pegasus.
"Oh my gosh, I am SO sorry you had to see that," she stammered, desperately trying to tuck her wings back next to her body.
"Are you okay honey bun?" asked Applejack, who was unsuccessfully trying to keep herself from laughing.
"Yeah, I'm fine," shot Dash, "I think I just need a drink."
Applejack jumped at the opportunity. "Oh! I got just the thing! I've been whippin' up a spiced cider that'll knock yer' wings off! Come on!" As she led the ponies off, Rainbow Dash dropped back next to Twilight.
"You've been pretty quiet, Twi. You okay?"
"Yeah," Twilight managed to get out, "It's just..."
A look of subdued horror spread on Dash's face.”Oh no. Please tell me you're not against me and Applejack being together, please!"
Twilight recoiled. "What? No! It's just... The whole 'mare on mare' thing is a bit... Foreign. Same sex relationships never really happened in Canterlot, or at least not publicly. I'm sure once do some research on it, I'll get better acquainted with the idea of you and Applejack."
Dash rolled her eyes. "Research? You are really something, Twi." Dash playfully punched her, but then became very serious. "Thank you, for being so supportive. We were really worried how you were gonna take it." she said, enveloping the unicorn in a bear hug.
"Hey, whatever makes you happy makes me happy." Twilight said. "Now, if you could just let go of me, you're kind of crushing me."
"Oh! Sorry!" Dash squeaked, a sheepish grin on her face. "Oh, by the way, don't tell anyone I went all mushy-gushy on you. I have an image to protect!" she said, puffing out her chest.
"Alright, I promise. Now let's go, I want to try That cider Applejack was talking so highly of." Dash, nodded, speeding ahead to catch up with Applejack, the two gently leaning on each other for support as much as affection as they walked out of the barn.
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I love this story and lol about the wings.
God I wish I could like, make it a law that you are not allowed to write stories with kissing in until you can write a story that makes it clear two characters are in love without them doing anything more intimate than a handshake
XD oh my....cant wait for more
when i said that, i totally meant for you to make more :3
More!
For a little literary morsel such as this was, it was quite rich.
I look forward to reading more of your work.
I'm with all shippings, but so far, my favorites are:
1)Twilight X Trixie
2)Vinyl X Octavia
3)Rainbow Dash X Twilight Sparkle
4)Celestia X Twilight Sparkle
5)Luna X Twilight Sparkle
I still love Appledash fics and it gave me a laugh. Loved it, 4/5 :)
Bucking Beautiful
-Theengineerbrony
Can't ever have enough appledash! Great story
130668
I have to agree on this point, though to be fair the kiss was more about Dash showing off than showing to the reader. Still it's more convincing if an author can show signs that the characters are in love without resorting to more obvious actions like kissing or declaring they are in love. I would have probably had
------------------------------------------
With that said this fic was aptly titled. It's not particularly bad or anything, though it's not remarkable. I suppose that it wasn't aiming for much more than a drabble given the circumstances of the composition. (And writing these sorts of things can be valuable practice when learning the craft of writing early on.) I could offer some suggestions on prose, though given that I have not read your other stories and the circumstances of this story's composition I'm not sure if it's fair to make suggestions yet.
With that in mind I feel the need to comment on the following: you certainly have a facility for find humour in the everyday and trivial. If you aren't already working on that, it looks like something worth developing in your writing. Lines like Pinkie declaring they need to throw a "Hey-guess-what-Rainbow-Dash-and-Applejack-are-doin'-it'-party" or AJ's comment about Dash's performance in bed. (There's even a few ideas that could be expanded to a larger story like Twilight and Big Mac trying to come to terms with same sex relationships among people special in their life.) If nothing else the humour and simple prose give the story a breezy feel, which makes it move along quite easily. With some practice I can see you building comedies that find humour in the trivial, everyday happenings like the ones you detailed in the fic. You may want to look at writers like Douglas Adams, Terry Pratchett, and P.G. Wodehouse for ideas.
That was amazing, lovely, and funny. I really laughed loud with the "Well you certainly were a stallion last night." part. It just made my day.
You're a really good writer. I would love to read "the night before" Now don't you be getting bad thoughts about what I've said, I was referring at the part where they confess they love for each other and that, but I got nothing against clopfics so it's up to you to do what you want, but you need to do this! you're great!
130688 more appledash?
130688 more appledash?
131039 YAY
131464 I try to find humor in life (It helps make the day more bearable) and I guess that just sorta rubbed off into my writing. Also, I think that whole "Big mac and Twilight come to terms" tangent might just work out... it's worth a shot anyway.
132300 That... is a GREAT IDEA!!! I might just have to write that now
But just for you? I shall get to writing... (epic background music) THE NIGHT BEFORE!
However I can tell you right now there will be no clop. Insinuated clop? You bet, but no actual sex. I find that I usually end up just giving the reader an anatomy lesson, which infuriates me
I hope so see more of this. Really liking it!
ok, the kiss at the beginning was a bit much
there's a spelling error in the last paragraph, you capitalized that
and I admire you for jumping head first into this
just you may need to add a little backstory next time, but that's just a personal preference I guess
312899 I've improved on my writing a lot since this story. My best work to date has to be Serenade. It's a second person fic with "you" and Rarity. Read it!... or not.
whats the name of the sequal to this story ?
365867 It's more of a prequel, and it's called "The night Before".
365896ya but isnt there a story tht could take place after this story like further into the future not a prequal if tht makes sense
365904 I could certainly write one, if that's what you're getting at. It's Spring Break, after all! I have all the time in the world!
ok then y does this one say incomplete then
366912 that is a heinous error in my part. It is complete an meant to be a one-shot through and through. I apologize.
thats ok but it does seem incomplete at the end tho thats y i mentioned u should do another chapter contiinueing if u do dont be that guy tht makes it end sad or tragic those kinda suck from my point of veiw
368741 Beggers can't be choosers, my friend.
But yeah, now that it's in my head, I definitely have to write it now. I'm juggling three other projects, so don't expect it to be out tomorrow, though. :feelsbadpony:
no ik these things take time im trying to figure out what i should write but im stuck if its rushed it wount be good
Moar! you can never have too much appledash!
869269 I made a prequel to this, you can read it here if you'd like.
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/8257/The-Night-Before
869290 I know. I read it first. it was good. but I meant other than these two... um if that's alright with you.
869386 Goodness, so much shipping!
katenoble.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Overwhelmed.jpg
Nah, just kidding. Appledash may be OTP, but there won't be anything from me for at least another month or so. I hate saying no, but I have a big super-secret-snot-shipping project that I'm working on right now.
If you want, you can read what I have done.
Damn,this is.good for being made in like,what, fifteen minutes?
this is awesome good work
I agree with you Diamond Sparkle Its a good story and the thing with the wings LOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!\