• Member Since 4th Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen Last Thursday

faktopus


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Roughneck lance finds themselves stranded on Equis, an uncharted planet well outside of the Inner Sphere. They must make new allies, and find a place in this new society, but they've got questions as well.

Just as the Mechwarriors are beginning to settle in, they're rudely interrupted by some new arrivals. Pirates that have an old grudge against the Lance's leader: Alex

(currently re-writing/editing all 86k words, should be putting up about 10k words a day as I complete them. Thanks for your patience.)

Chapters (2)
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Comments ( 38 )

Sir I love you for doing this.
These are the games that got me Into gaming.

Hopefully this will live up to the standard set by The Thessalonica Legacy.

WHY THE BUCK DID I NOT FIND THIS SOONER

Mechwarrior and MLP......sounds like a plan to me.

YOU CRASY BASTARD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE YOUR EDITING YOUR WIRTEING ALLL AT ONECE NEIN NEIN NEIN UN ACEPTABLE
:twilightsmile::rainbowdetermined2::pinkiesad2::raritycry::unsuresweetie::trixieshiftleft::scootangel::twistnerd::twilightsmile:

Second verse, same as the first. A little bit longer and twenty percent cooler. :rainbowkiss:

From the looks of it, you seemed to have just merged the first few chapters together and added to it. The pre-touchdown scenes are much better, admittedly I sort of skimmed through those the first time around (in other words, I thought they were boring). Now, they are actually enticing enough for me to to enjoy reading them because it provides insight; it also does not sound too much like a quickie history lesson.

Though the rewrite is an overall improvement, there are still a few concerns. Most prominently the italicization (buck spelling) of 'Mech names. Ocassionally you wrote Hunchback as Hunchback, but more often than not you wrote Dragon as Dragon. Though I would allow the rare exception without much thought, yeah, they are actually being the rule right now. You may want to go back and italicize them at some point, not necessarily right now, in the wake of funny being posted. But eventually you should iron them out...

Other than that, I know I am going to love reading this again. :yay:

Ah I see what happened. . . deleting chapters deleted the comments posted in those chapters. *facepalm* anyway.

2408400 Glad you enjoyed it, I got a little rushed to put this first part out before I left this afternoon to do some stuff, however. . . yeah Mech names are meant to be italicized. I derped :facehoof:

Ah, Battletech: the thing that first made me give a crap about computers. I've probably got enough hours logged into Mechwarrior 2 to build a scale model Timber Wolf from memory.

This is pretty awesome so far, so I hope there's going to be more. The bit with the Everfree reacting to high energy events to the point of taking a mech for it's own was a spot of genius

Long live the Sea Fox.

I'd been meaning to leave a comment/review for this for the past couple days now, but originally I had wanted to include a picture with my post, but in my search for one I got lost in the Internets and much time was lost.

Regardless, as for this new and redone chapter, I was immensely impressed with what you've done here. The increased length was an unexpected but much welcomed surprise, cuz I'm sure I'm not the only one who can never get enough of certain great and amazing. Your attention to detail was great, I mean, the fact that Vlad's mech's weaponry shouldn't have survived the sideways crash landing after orbital re-entry completely flew over my the first time; I would never have noticed unless someone pointed it out to me.

Oh, and one last thing, the explaination of Vlad's Mech's special ability to divert all power to the mech's movement speed. For someone who's only ever played Mechassualt 2: Lone Wolf and essentially knows shit-all about the
Mechwarrior universe, it's incredibly useful to have there.


Anyway, now that we've gotten All'en that out of the way, we can finally move Foyward in this story.

CDR

Hey. Is this thing dead? Cause if it is, ima stop watching it for updates. Otherwise, update away. Rather interesting this single chapter.

2580396
Far from it, I've just been lazy for a bit. new chapter coming within the week. :moustache:

2609129
I KNOW! :raritydespair:
Don't worry. . . it's on the way. just needs some finishing touches so it'll be up tonight.

Oh boy... This will not end well.:facehoof:

Well, I will have to say that this is much better than your first go around:twilightsmile::twilightsmile:
Keep up the good work, I will be watching from the shadows:rainbowdetermined2:

Well, at least he didn't go all ape shit like last time:trixieshiftleft: I really hope that you don't kill off all the main characters accept like 2 like last time. Killing all your characters is bad:raritywink: You should have Pinkie tackle Zack and give him a big hug:pinkiehappy: Then he should proceed to passout like a boss:rainbowlaugh:
Keep up the good work, I will be looking forward to the next chapter. I will be watching from the shadows:rainbowdetermined2:

wait where'd the story go and why? :pinkiegasp:

You took down all the old chapters. I do not agree with that. No. You keep them up and have a note that you have gone back to edit and then transfer every chapter when you catch back up. This is how I do it, and it's how many others do it from when I have asked about such.

2995991
If I were just editing, I'd leave them there. As it is, the chapter content is changing drastically, and it would make no sense to read from start to finish.

2997341 I understand that "editing" could be a re-write. But to take it down just ruins it entirely. No, instead, keep them up until the edits are done via something like Google Docs or some outside source. Once ALL of them are done, do one massive switch here and add a note either as a chapter or in the bio that all the chapters have updated and a re-read should be done to truly understand what comes later, if there is more later.

Did you use Black Widow Company as the backers for the Roughnecks?

3018187
No? I've seen them around MWO though, played with them 1 match.

3020187 Feel like you did have them in the story. Anyways, I found them as Bravo Whisky Charlie in MWO. They sound awesome. Anyways, dude, we should totally play together sometime.

3022030
Sure, my mwo name is the same as it is on fimfic. Just shoot me a pm on here so I know what your name is in mwo, I don't really accept random friend requests.

I miss this story. I remember being so excited when I'd see that a new chapter had been put up; I couldn't wait until I could sit down and read it.

Outside his Mech, however, he was a very exposed target.

Then get back in, moron.

a simple shield spell could've stopped the projectile.

AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAH!!!! That is used against Battle Suits. You'd have been ****ed!

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